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Hypervane

Remember, it's humans who are weird. The internet just lets us see that a bit more clearly.

___

D'awww. Nothing is more adorable and arousing than someone who loves you, who doesn't have a choice in loving you, who doesn't care that they have no choice, and who doesn't care that they don't care. <3
► IshtarsLittleLoveBird
Replied on March 1, 2011:
No that is impossible. The Simurgh is in space not on Earth. They cannot be in love. It is inappropriate to suggest that The Simurgh attacked Boston simply to be near Ishtar and grew to immediately love and cherish her. The Simurgh does not love. I love her. I am not the Simurgh. The Simurgh is a giant bird. I am small and not a bird.
What makes you think the gods of Ancient Mesopotamia don't operate under Hentai Physics?
I think Professor Dick Beefwood PHD is a little too good at being Professor Dick Beefwood PHD to not actually be Professor Dick Beefwood PHD.
I just find there's more charm to raping a person, when you still respect what sort of person they are, if that makes any sense.
I'm reminded of the fishing minigame from Ocarina of Time where you have to alternate between giving the fish slack and reeling it in. So basically, courting a tsundere is like catching the Hylian Loach.
If you're doing anal prolapse porn, have the damn foresight to hire a guy with a big enough dick to fuck her ass back in after the dildo prolapses it.

It's just common sense!
"Honk the horn, jesus god, Sheev!"

The high pitched blaring of the horn sounded as the speeding car crashed through stands of fruits and vegetables.

"The white supremacists Christopher, they've sabotaged the car!"
In real life, Duke would be a terrifying rape monster that would probably be legal to shoot on sight. Here, he's an adorable housepet who just wants to fuck every woman he sees into a drooling pleasure coma.
The tall man shook his head, "Oh heavens no, I purchased a de-sanctified Swiss monastery and staff it with previously homeless art students to paint it all for me, I certainly don't paint any of these things myself."
"I played a game called Babylon 5 Wars once, before I met Lisa's mother. A man broke into my home, and held me at gunpoint to force me to play, as he heard I had the only full collection of miniatures for that game left in the world." Lisa's stepdad looked around them, a self-satisfied smile on his face. "To my annoyance he was winning, until in his frustration he turned his back and I restrained him until the police could come arrest the miscreant."
The bedroom closet had room for at least half a dozen lesbians, but wasn't occupied.
I looked at that section when I was done and thought to myself "If I can't even write about someone being stimulated during a video call while she tries to keep her composure without that being heartwarming, I may have a problem."
I thought it was self evident that the Naruto Run was the optimal mating display. Sticking out the ass, leaning forward and curving the spine to display the chest, and arms positioned as if being used as handholds for getting railed from behind. This is basic ninja shit my dude.
NOTE: the Kunochi Run obviously displays cleavage and submissiveness, while the Shinobi Run displays the broad shoulders and pectoral muscles, as well as the musculature of the ass and thighs for thrust power. The arms are to show solidarity and a willingness to reciprocate via pegging.
You've successfully extricated yourself from a sticky social situation using the black art of Necromancy. There's no longer anything they can directly do to stop you from going to the whorehouse!
All those moments will be lost in time, like jizz in a drain.
The Triumvirate were a bunch of disaffected Generation Xers, and thus, immune to the Bieber Fever.
The breeding fetish and erotic technique of the Silver Eyed Warriors has been passed down for countless generations. It is genetic, and also the reason why there are still a couple of them around, probably.
"You have North America's most sought after femboy on your team and you're not sleeping with him?" Magos asked Grue incredulously, "Are you gay or something?"
Blessed is the mind too small for doubt.
feeling gloriously self-righteous about having reaffirmed the core of my moral fiber, with steel in my backbone and my head held high, I began preparing to whore my body out to a violent, superpowered, neo-Nazi supervillain.


I no longer remember why I found this one funny, but it was the first quote here so I'm keeping it around.
"... Just wondering here." Alec raised a hand, the motion almost as lazy as the slouch he was doing in his chair. "I've got to ask. Are we allowed to say 'fuck' as much as we want in the new world order?"

"Only if it makes grammatical sense. Otherwise, feel free. It makes you relatable to the youth."

He nodded. "Fuck yeah."
Birthday
May 4
Location
Lost
Occupation
Being lost.
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