Questionable Questing

I'm actually quite skilled in the writing of the second-person narrative. I struggle with first and third person. Especially third person limited.

Literally everything I write I feel ashamed of. Because I compare it to the works of authors who I admire. And I feel like a piece of shit, a child trying to write and wondering how many compliments I'm receiving are just empty pats on the head.

I wonder how many people are just saying nice things because they feel they have to. And how many are mocking me.

I mean, I have an actual plot outline for my story. My issue is trying to flesh out the plot outline into actual narrative.

I even had a draft for a good boss fight action scene. Essentially taking place mid-story. Imagine a relative newbie at the dragonborn business going against someone with far more experience.
It's basically my protag literally trying not to fucking die because she got surprised by a fight she had no idea was coming. And only not getting killed because she had more raw power.

And didn't let herself fall onto being on the defensive. Because the moment she relents in just hitting with the figurative hammer? Is when she would die/lose. She lacks experience, so she keeps the enemy from being able to pull out fancy offensive tricks she can't counter.

Was a solid action sequence. But lost it with the old harddrive.

Were I to rewrite it, I'd have the prologue expanded upon and paced differently. With it being published later. Yet parts of it referenced in the story proper without being the focus of its own chapters.

Essentially, if my character came into contact with people who were relevant to her remembering stuff that happened during her first week or so. I'd reference it by way of fitting dialogue that hints at it, or internal thoughts that hint at it. Leaving readers wondering PRECISELY what the fuck happened at Helgen and Riverwood.

My plans for Riverwood include her leaving mostly out of a sense of obligation and my own personal issue of never wanting to be a burden or impose myself on others. I HATE needing help. Which sucks when you've just become a different sex, race, and in a different world with no resources.

I'm proud, and not afraid to admit it. And as such, my character's first few adventures were mostly an extension and consequence of feeling obligated to pay someone back for what she perceives as a favor.
I'm not a hero of justice. I just have a sense of obligation and personal duty. I hate receiving material help, because I feel like I'm in someone's debt. And I can't STAND that.

So there's a lot of interesting things I could do with that kind of SI. Less dicking with the THalmor. More "Joining the Legion because they pay well and I owe them a favor/Joining the Stormcloaks because some Stormcloak dude kept me from literally freezing to death once on the road because I was too fucking dumb to pack proper survival gear."

A character whose motivations aren't based on abstract ideals and more on interpersonal relationships and dealings with other people could be FUN.
I also don't make promises lightly.

I sincerely apologize for rambling so much. Just stating that I run with character over themes or plot.
I'm also not some charismatic brilliant person. I'm just good at finding out what people are good at, and assigning them to roles they'd work well at. Less conquering hero, more middle management.:lol:

Why does she go to the Mages College? Because her body sucks at actually fighting, and isn't built for it and exercising properly is tough because of curves.
Also magic is a relatively easier route to power for her. Even if she'd probably spend more time reading history texts than magic books.

https://i.imgur.com/JQ9K4vR.png
http://img06.deviantart.net/c642/i/2016/294/6/5/brinja_by_talitapersi-dalqbio.jpg
Think a combination of these two in build, once she's gotten in good shape after joining a faction that emphasizes it. Still curvy, but definitely toned and strong. Also magic undergarments keep tit bouncing to a minimum.

You definetely put far more thought into your story idea than I ever did into one of mine which is not saying much but is definetly a good thing.
No need to apologise - I'm actually quite interested in how stories are made which of course then includes outlines and stuff.

I spend more time outlining a story, doing the worldbuilding, and other things than I do actually writing.
And with Skyrim I spend so much god damn time trying to make something interesting out of the source material. To the point where it's barely recognizable. Save for in broad strokes.

I think I also made it a point to essentially write the Skyrim my SI was dropped into as a clear continuation of the type of world that Daggerfall and Morrowind were. A High Fantasy setting with complex political elements where mortals are the primary focus.

Fun fact, outline included in one "path"... well, my Dovahkiin bungling her way to becoming Jarl over Winterhold, and then managing to rally some support for her bid for the High Kingship. Because the Blades had a vested interest in making her High Queen. Even though she'd fucking rather just be at home in bed with the strong handsome man she'd gotten close to over the past two years. But, you know, life sucks.