Christ, you doing okay mate?
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Questionable Questing
0Jordinio0
Im_just_a_Reader
Too numb to be honest, not much motivation these days. Grandma and my sister are always nagging and Shouting and I just stood there. Listlessly listening in their words as I feel guilty whenever I look at my grades.
Im_just_a_Reader
It wasn't the best, I missed 2nd and 3rd quarter and I'm honestly not in the right state of mind.
My friend.. well, he move out with his relatives a few cities away and I can't help but feel guilty whenever I have a conversation with my mother who's abroad
My friend.. well, he move out with his relatives a few cities away and I can't help but feel guilty whenever I have a conversation with my mother who's abroad
Im_just_a_Reader
I feel like shit, but unlike in my grade 6 and 8 where suicide is still viable, the idea that I'd be leaving an elderly, a grade 7 Lil sis, a single mother and a fucking crackhead of a sister in a small town makes me fucking crazy, guilty and absolutely insane from indecision.
Im_just_a_Reader
It was agonizing, the only good thing that happened is that I'm far too numb to physically react.
Sorry for the rant, I don't have anyone to talk about this, my closest and only friend is out of reach and I can't even properly vent because I know damn well they'd be affected if they ever saw me having a meltdown again.
Sorry for the rant, I don't have anyone to talk about this, my closest and only friend is out of reach and I can't even properly vent because I know damn well they'd be affected if they ever saw me having a meltdown again.
Im_just_a_Reader
Last time it didn't go well, I keep screaming to go away because I don't want to hurt them. Physically and emotionally
Im_just_a_Reader
, I'd rather have my fingers dislocated and bleed over again rather than hurting them.
It was horrible, and it felt disgusting that I'd even yell and I'd rather not do that again.
It was horrible, and it felt disgusting that I'd even yell and I'd rather not do that again.
Im_just_a_Reader
Having my head smashed with a chain and padlock in fight couldn't compare to this, I'm supposed to be a man.
I'm supposed to fill the role as a provider to help my sisters and mother. I shouldn't even be anywhere close with my FUCKING father who abandoned his own responsibilities to fuck someone else wife and leave us alone.
I'm supposed to fill the role as a provider to help my sisters and mother. I shouldn't even be anywhere close with my FUCKING father who abandoned his own responsibilities to fuck someone else wife and leave us alone.
Im_just_a_Reader
I should've been stronger than this! I Couldn't even buy an antidepressant because for some reason my grandmother and
Im_just_a_Reader
mother doesn't want me to when they're aware of my suicide attempts last month, can't even buy on my own as it needs doctor transcripts
Im_just_a_Reader
.
My sister offered a magic mushroom but I immediately refuse it out of wariness when it comes to addiction
My sister offered a magic mushroom but I immediately refuse it out of wariness when it comes to addiction