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  1. TimBaril

    Save the Girl (and Get the World)
    Threadmarks: Chapter 5 - Will It Be a Watery Grave?

    The Oasis I watched that huge-ass papa scorpion coming for me. Maybe it was the way the starlight reflected off the thing's shiny exoskeleton. Maybe it was how it dwarfed me in size and power. But it reminded me of Beef, someone I hadn't thought of in a while. Seeing it reminded me how much...
  2. TimBaril

    Dungeon Master: It's a Magical World
    Threadmarks: Chapter 5 - Wood Collector

    Kai soon realized that his sense of space had been totally screwed up, thanks to his transformation. What had once seemed close in human terms now seemed much, much further away in gremlin terms. Shorter legs. That was partially why all his exploring in the first couple of days here had seemed...
  3. TimBaril

    Dude! Where's My Princess?
    Threadmarks: Chapter 6 - Bonus Life

    ARWIN There was an indefinite period of nothingness. Then bright sunlight blinded Arwin. He rocked and rolled in his seat as the car sped through the musical blue field. Instinctively, he slammed on the brakes and twisted the wheel. The car swerved, slid sideways, and came to a halt a hand's...
  4. TimBaril

    Save the Girl (and Get the World)
    Threadmarks: Chapter 4 - Flashback to Dragon Dojo

    Flashback Some Years Ago Despite the badass name, Dragon Dojo was very much a typical suburban attraction. No cobras, no wax on, wax off. It catered to local kids, families, and the occasional housewife who wanted something different from the many aerobics classes down the street at the...
  5. TimBaril

    Dungeon Master: It's a Magical World
    Threadmarks: Chapter 4 - How Unexpected

    DUNGEON CORE (POOR) UPGRADE FOUND UPGRADING… Had he bought a poor-quality dungeon core? Figured. That sales guy had been sketchy as hell. Kai felt a burst of loathing for the man. Then he took a moment to think about it and realized that the transaction had probably been fair. After all, he...
  6. TimBaril

    Dude! Where's My Princess?
    Threadmarks: Chapter 5 - Blue Screen of Death

    ARWIN The old timer frowned, then caught on and burst out laughing. A moment later, the others got it, too. "The naked guy!" "A not-so-heavenly body. A local one!" Arwin nodded. "I'll bet he has one. We've got to capture him and get a key from him." He thought quickly. "We need a...
  7. TimBaril

    Save the Girl (and Get the World)
    Threadmarks: Chapter 3 - All right, I'll Kill You Too

    The momma scorpion rushed me straight on, no more games, causing the bastard of a baby scorpion to flee fast. I pathetically tried to fend the momma off with the spear, but it was having none of it. It just kept attacking, big pincers punching and snipping at me. It drove me back into the soft...
  8. TimBaril

    Dungeon Master: It's a Magical World
    Threadmarks: Chapter 3 - Error

    Kai's pulse picked up as he stared at the messages floating in his vision, his little gremlin heart rapidly fluttering in his chest. This was just like one of those stupid litRPG novels or isekai light novels or anime where some idiot gets reborn in a new world and is given overpowered abilities...
  9. TimBaril

    Dude! Where's My Princess?
    Threadmarks: Chapter 4 - Blue Collar Slavery

    ARWIN Arwin fled from the bluebloods as fast as he could, heart racing from the danger and the pace, vaulting roots and gullies, swerving between trunks, and trying to find the most difficult terrain that might slow down the horses hot on his tail. A thunderous crack sounded from above...
  10. TimBaril

    Save the Girl (and Get the World)
    Threadmarks: Chapter 2 - Momma Scorpion

    When I crawled out of my hole, the ring lit up, and the holo-screen appeared. I was level 2. My health stat had gone up. I felt better. Relatively. My full-body sunburn was peeling, and the electric burns stung. The sores were still leaking pus and stank, so I forced myself to open them up and...
  11. TimBaril

    Save the Girl (and Get the World)
    Threadmarks: Chapter 1 - Arriving in a New World Sucks

    "I hate Truck-kun, and I hate the four wheels he rode on!" The blazing sun overhead seemed to take up half the otherwise empty, pale blue sky, while golden orange sand dunes stretched to the horizon in all directions. I stood there, trembling with grief and shock in the hot, dry desert air...
  12. TimBaril

    Dungeon Master: It's a Magical World
    Threadmarks: Chapter 2 - Divine Wish

    The salesman pulled the cube back as he straightened, winked and clucked his tongue with a roguish smile. "Don't you worry, sir." He put the cube back under his cloak and pulled out a roll of paper. With a flick of his wrist, it rolled open. It was a rather nice scroll, with heavy paper filled...
  13. TimBaril

    Dungeon Master: It's a Magical World
    Threadmarks: Chapter 1 - Wanna Buy a Dungeon?

    "Hey. You wanna buy a dungeon?" The shady salesman's eyes warily shifted left and right like some cartoon villain before returning to land on what he seemed to think was a potential customer. Not that he looked much like a door-to-door salesman. He was scruffy and unshaved, his blue eyes were...
  14. TimBaril

    Dude! Where's My Princess?
    Threadmarks: Chapter 3 - The Garden

    ARWIN Disheartened expressions melted away, and both blue women beamed up at him with pearly-white teeth. Aoi's expression was brimming with hope. "You will?" Bleu seemed excited. "But what of Lord Azamont? They are in his possession, after all. He's the most powerful noble in the land...
  15. TimBaril

    Dude! Where's My Princess?
    Threadmarks: Chapter 2 - Blue People

    ARWIN Looking out over the field and listening to its mournful sounds in the breeze, he realized that he very much didn't want to go home. In a whole new world, a dazzling place he'd never before known, where he didn't dare close his eyes, he felt free of all that had been dragging him down...
  16. TimBaril

    Dude! Where's My Princess?
    Threadmarks: Chapter 1 - Magic and Puns!

    ARWIN Love is an adventure, so they say. You know what is also an adventure? Leaving the world you know and entering a new one. One Saturday, in a bit of a blue funk, Arwin tried to distract himself by helping out around his parents' house but quickly grew restless and put them aside. His...
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