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  1. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    Remove full stop(?)
  2. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    got a rogue ] there.
  3. BlackCoat13

    Applied Mathemagics

    Are you just cross-posting it or are you going to resume writing this?
  4. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    That is what happened, yes. Clone Hitler also married an South American black woman and had... I want to say three kids? And also stabbed one of the Nazi villains with the Spear of Destiny? I'm pretty sure I'm remembering that right but I've vaguer on the specifics. It was a mildly amusing arc.
  5. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    either. It's (remove rogue [ ) soldiers, and
  6. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    kidnapping / kidnapped victim-. kidnapping victim. Kidnap is only used as kidnap in present tense as a verb. "I will kidnap you." Unless it's different in British English?
  7. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    sometimes x2 Politicians do foolish things sometimes, / do do foolish things
  8. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    About half of the chapter is in orange, and about 2/5ths of it is in italics.
  9. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    Somehow this is the weirdest Paulcert.
  10. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    No. If I'm remembering the conversation right P. Sephtian and another animal form hybrid were talking to the MC, and the MC asked if they would be willing to take a conversion to a pureblood if it became available. The other hybrid was a bit offended, but Professor Sephtian was willing to...
  11. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    Got a tag.
  12. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    And?" Did they mind control Zatanna there? I don't really get what happened.
  13. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    Well, A: I'm not sure he'd exactly care, but Paul is not a member of the Justice League so his actions can't be held against them unless it's in a 'why didn't you stop him' manner, in which case it's because he's pretty much impossible to track, divert, or halt, and can casually defeat teams of...
  14. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    then."
  15. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    Orin has two
  16. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    Paul: *Was nearly killed 'by complete accident' by an incredibly powerful wizard / sorcerer whom the group doesn't have sufficient reason to view as anything better than tensely neutral with them who is currently being very sus and dismissive, and is absolutely going to either betray them...
  17. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    And to do / or, I suppose 'And due to' though it doesn't really fit. No, I don't think Smiley has any interest in allowing specific plotlines to play out rather than preventing the broad Earth setting from changing. Which he notably kind of failed at, since Earth is a massive mess after the...
  18. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    First, is 'Is he what, you-!' is that meant to be dialogue? I don't think so, but if it is it needs quotation marks. Second, 'looking a awkward.' is probably meant to be 'a bit awkward.'
  19. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    Ah. My bad.
  20. BlackCoat13

    With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

    Seems a bit odd that the MC doesn't notice him being enlightened. You'd think he'd comment on it, due to the relative rarity of meeting Enlightened individuals. I recall that Red / Rage Enlightened English... cop? from way back who the MC notices had reached Enlightenment all on his own purely...
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