• The site has now migrated to Xenforo 2. If you see any issues with the forum operation, please post them in the feedback thread.
  • Due to issues with external spam filters, QQ is currently unable to send any mail to Microsoft E-mail addresses. This includes any account at live.com, hotmail.com or msn.com. Signing up to the forum with one of these addresses will result in your verification E-mail never arriving. For best results, please use a different E-mail provider for your QQ address.
  • For prospective new members, a word of warning: don't use common names like Dennis, Simon, or Kenny if you decide to create an account. Spammers have used them all before you and gotten those names flagged in the anti-spam databases. Your account registration will be rejected because of it.
  • Since it has happened MULTIPLE times now, I want to be very clear about this. You do not get to abandon an account and create a new one. You do not get to pass an account to someone else and create a new one. If you do so anyway, you will be banned for creating sockpuppets.
  • Due to the actions of particularly persistent spammers and trolls, we will be banning disposable email addresses from today onward.
  • The rules regarding NSFW links have been updated. See here for details.

Angel of the sea

Created at
Index progress
Hiatus
Watchers
158
Recent readers
0

Angel of the Sea - One Piece SI

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oo-o-o-o-o

Being a baby sucks.

Oh, I'm sure...
Chapter 1

abyss_kaiser

Ruler of the Darkest Depths
Joined
Oct 23, 2018
Messages
3,403
Likes received
104,997
Angel of the Sea - One Piece SI

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oo-o-o-o-o

Being a baby sucks.

Oh, I'm sure normal babies don't feel like that much, but when you are an adult mind stuffed into such a form you tend to swing wildly between boredom, embarrassment and horror.

Ah yes, when I died in my last life, apparently something stuck with my soul (which I'm fairly sure exists now… or at least I hope so) and I had all my memories of my past life.

Once I got over the panic and confusion, I found a bright side.

23 extra years of life sounded like a good enough deal.

Still, I couldn't do much as a baby, as previously stated.

Plus, I didn't just get born back in my old world.

Oh, how do I know this, you might ask?

Well, it might have something to do with the wings my parents, and me I assume, had….

Yeah...

O-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I stared at my mother meandering about the hut.

Other than the wings, she was the image of a Native American, just… off.

Chewing on my teething toy, I grunted with pain as yet another tooth came in.

A distinct difference from my past life. Human teeth were almost cartoonish in their simplicity. The only real difference each tooth had was that the "molars" were wider and better for grinding, and the front teeth were thinner, better for cutting through meat and such.

I paused in my teething as my father come rushing into the hut, face scrunched up in fear.

"Kasa, we need to go now!"

My mother grabbed me and swiftly followed without much complaint, and soon I foud n out why as the sound of gunfire filled my ears.

"Yama! Where-" With a sharp crack, my mother fell limp, and I cried out as I fell on my wing.

Before I even had a chance to figure out what happened, strong arms wrapped around me and hugged to to their chest.

Looking up, I saw my father with his jaw clenched tight and slight tears beading in his eyes.

"Papa?" I asked, and he glanced down at me.

"Quiet now Aki." Was all he said, and suddenly their was a larger series of gunshots, making him curse.

Eventually we were far enough away for him to stop alongside several others of what was apparently our village.

Most were leaning on their knees and gasping for breath. One stood up tall.

"Men! The Shandia cannot take much more of this! God's soldiers have killed innocent women and children this day, and I shall never surrender until he is lying dead at our feet! Who is with me?!?"

The growing crowd roared, raising spears and guns into the air.

It was only then that I truly realized what had happened.

I was in One Piece, and I didn't have the luxury of avoiding danger.

I'll have to make myself strong.

o—oo-o---oo-o-o-o----o--o-oo-o

A/N – Time for me to jump on the One Piece train, let's hope, like Rocketman, it has no breaks!
 
Last edited:
Chapter 2
Angel of the Sea – One Piece SI

o-o—o-o--o-oo-o-o

I dodged the clumsy swing of my "sparring partner"

Since we were 10 right now, we were hardly seriously being trained.

That didn't mean I didn't take it seriously.

Dodging the next swing, I responded with a swing of my leg, making the boy fold over his damaged stomach.

I huffed when he didn't get back up.

"Wimp." I muttered, moving on to return to my actual training in peace.

"Wait, Aki! The Elder says none of us are allowed in Upper Yard without a party!" The boy shouted, but I ignored him to pay attention to my shooters, making sure they were secure on my feet.

"Meh." I stated without care, kicking off the ground and shooting away, hitting the kid with a blast of air.

Swiftly making my way across the White White Sea, I pulled out my pipe club in preparation, patting my waist to make sure I had my knife belted on.

Ah, yes, I do train in the Luffy manner. It gets the best results in this universe from what I can tell, I just keep a knife in reserve just in case.

Hitting the shores of Upper Yard, I weaved through the trees with an ease only gained through many embarrassing falls over the course of my childhood.

Coming to a stop via skidding along the ground with the blades of my shooters, I grinned at the sight of a giant boar sniffing in the bushes.

I haven't tried to take down one of the huge animals yet, but there's no time like the present.

Besides, I had a pretty obvious reward if I could do it.

Raising my pipe club, I screamed a challenge as I charged, and the boar swiftly turned and squealed back at me.

Dodging to the side at the last moment to dodge it's tusks, I swung down on it's spine with my club, making it squeal in pain.

Unfortunately, I missed the fact that it had back legs.

Crying out as hard hoofs dug into my chest, drawing blood, I grunted when I hit a tree.

Barely managing to keep myself from slumping over, I saw the boar snort and shake it's head.

Ah, a charge then, yeah?

With another squeal, it came charging.

I expertly rolled awa-

Ow!

Fuck!

Goddammit!

I screamed as I rolled down a hill I hadn't noticed before, gathering many small cut and bruises along the way.

Finally coming to a sudden halt via another tree, I groaned in pain and dropped my head back.

"Fuck me and my big head." I groaned out, before jerking up at the sound of trees snapping and pained squeals.

Looking up the hill, I paled at the sight of the boar performing a repeat of my folly.

"What're you doing you idiot!" I screamed, leaping to the side.

Just barely managing to dodge, the boar tore through the tree I had hit, before continuing on.

Sweatdropping, I sighed and tapped my shooters to make sure they could still function.

With a puff of air, they brought me back up a foot into the air.

"Damn wasted trip." I muttered, wincing at my many cuts and bruises.

Opening my satchel, I filled it with as much dirt as I could so that the trip wouldn't be too wasted, before shooting off.

o-oo-o—o-o-o-o-o-o

It was only as I was Exiting Upper Yard that I finally found civilization again. Unfortunately, they weren't happy to see me.

"Aki! What're you doing!" Roared the Warband leader Jin, swiftly approaching me and before I could get away he cuffed me on the head, hard. He knew I was tough enough to handle it.

"You know why I was in there, got some dir- Vearth on the way back." I said to him, fists on my hips defiantly.

The leader just sighed harshly, turned and waving an arm at me.

"Raki, take care of her, I need a smoke before we fight."

At that, a teenage girl came over and knelt next to me.

"You do know the men can handle the fighting right, Aki?" She asked without expecting an answer, swiftly applying salves to my cuts and occasionally wrapping me in gauze.

Ah, yes. The Shandia weren't the worst example of it, but women rarely became warriors in our tribe.

The fact I was reborn as a female wouldn't stop me from become a proper One Piece badass though.

"I don't see you taking your own words seriously." I uttered lowly, causing her to giggle and look into my eyes.

"Yeah yeah, just be more careful. Did you at least manage to get anything out of this trip?" She asked, and I nodded, opening my satchel.

"Just some dirt, not much."

She hummed, sifting her finger through the fertile soil, long used to my "strange" method of referring to dirt.

"It'll be good for a plant or two, do you want to plant the pumpkin Aki?" I nodded firmly, I love gardening, at least in a world without internet.

I paused, looking around at the group of warriors.

"You guys are attacking?" I asked, and Raki looked to me firmly.

I snorted.

"I'm not suicidal Raki, I'm not interested in joining in yet, just tell me what's going on."

She sighed, before looking up to the larger cloud the beanstalk connected to.

"The Skypieans are being invades by the Birkans, We're taking advantage of the chaos to attempt our own invasion. Hopefully this one actually achieves something."

I tilted my head, looking to Upper Yard.

Then my eyes widened.

"Raki, If you see large amounts of lightning, run. Just run." I said seriously, but she just laughed a little.

"Lightning? That's rare up here. Don't worry, I'll be fine." Walking away with a little wave, she started double checking her own weapons.

I huffed a bit, nobody took my "Predictions" seriously, mostly because I didn't have much to predict yet.

Still, if Birka is invading now, that meant Enel will be taking over as God.

I'll have to find other methods to train, Upper Yard is now untenable.

o-o-o---o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-oo

I was tending to my new pumpkin seedling when I noticed the war-band come stumbling into our current village, some were supporting their fellows, and others just collapsed once they found solid cloud.

Raki herself stumbled into me and my dad's hut, clutch me by my shoulders tightly.

"How did you know Aki, how could you possibly..." She said weakly, and I looked past her, seeing so many Shandians half dead and covered in distinct lightning patterned burns.

"I've always known Enel would come here and become God, but the details are hazy. All I know further is that he himself is effectively invincible to us, but, hrm." I looked up into the air, I'll have to keep my trap shut now.

Rushing into the house, I swiftly scribbled on a piece of parchment with my pencil (stolen from Blue Sea pirate ships of course) and shoved my message to her.

Raki gazed down at the scrawled message with a squint. The Shandia weren't exactly the most well read.

- Enel has incredibly powerful Mantra reinforced by a lightning devil-fruit which extends his range to ridiculous levels, he could listen in on any conversations we have. I'd advice moving our village as far as is viable from Upper Yard and only writing important matters.

As it were, he has a weakness. A sufficient amount of water, or direct contact with a material known as "Seastone" to the Blue Sea dwellers, can make him effectively helpless. Seastone should be our number one priority. -

Once she looked up to me with a shocked look, I shrugged.

"I know it'll be hard to convince the others, but if nothing else keep an eye out when we raid ships, alright?"

She nodded, before slumping onto a chair and immediately falling asleep.

I gave a short laugh before looking out the window nervously.

Big Brother's watching now.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o—o-o-

A/N – There isn't much I can cover in Aki's childhood. She's generally just trying to train as much as she can in preparation for the future, and avoiding getting blasted into ash. So from now on she'll just be avoiding Upper Yard like the plague until canon
As it were, next chapter will be, I think, just before canon to set things up.
 
This went under my rader.

Skypea huh?

I have to see more chapters to past my judgement.

The two are simply lacking for me.

I can already see the SI either being a pirate or a revolutionsry just like all One Piece OCs and SIs out there.

I will be surprise if SI becomes a Marine but....

:p
 
This went under my rader.

Skypea huh?

I have to see more chapters to past my judgement.

The two are simply lacking for me.

I can already see the SI either being a pirate or a revolutionsry just like all One Piece OCs and SIs out there.

I will be surprise if SI becomes a Marine but....

:p
Unless you're evil or delusional there is no reason to join the Marines. (at least if you have knowledge of what thew world government really is)
 
Unless you're evil or delusional there is no reason to join the Marines. )

So you're saying that Pirates are just a bunch of happy-go-lucky merry band of sea travelers exploring the seas?

Or Revolutionaries are heroes whose actions are not disrupting the peace some people have?

Seriously?

To paint the Marines as an evil entity is simpy delusional thinking.
 
So you're saying that Pirates are just a bunch of happy-go-lucky merry band of sea travelers exploring the seas?

Or Revolutionaries are heroes whose actions are not disrupting the peace some people have?

Seriously?

To paint the Marines as an evil entity is simpy delusional thinking.
I meant as somebody who knows what the world government is up to. I'm not saying the vast majority of Marines aren't good people, just that knowing joining the military arm of such a legitimately horrible government as the World Government is pretty shitty.

But I've already argued this exact point on SB, so i'm ending this here.
 
Chapter 3
Angel of the Sea - One Piece SI

Oo-o-o-o--o-o-o

I nervously cleaned my pair of pistols and sword.

At 14 most everybody was expecting me to join in on the raids. If I hadn't made myself so strong they would likely have allowed me to live in peace, but since I was just about our strongest tribesman, I'd certainly be shunned if I didn't join in soon.

I paused as I was making sure my dials were in working order. Wyper had already taken over as the War-band leader at the tender age of 16, but even so I could still beat him more often then not during spars.

Funny, how the boy I bullied had grown up so much already...

He probably wouldn't be leaving anybody alive to fend for themselves on a successful raid.

I sucked in a deep breath.

I'm going to go kill people.

Reassembling my pistols, i glanced over them.

Built pretty much exactly like Braham's flash guns, except instead of flash dials I had Impact dials installed, effectively making each shot resemble something more like a high caliber rifle than a pistol.

… I made a lot of money off hunting beasts nobody else could.

I shook my head and stowed them on my thigh holsters, then grabbed my mediocre but effective sword and knife, putting the knife in my tanto style holster.

Standing up, I looked into my small mirror.

I wore simple getup of grey halter top and short shorts, I've never been afraid of showing a little skin.

No shoes other than my shooters, because fuck shoes.

Palming my long black bangs out of my face, I grabbed a bandoleer of grenades before exiting my hut.

Hugging my father (He's our resident farming expert) he hugged me back tightly.

"Be careful Aki, I know you're smart enough to run if needed, so there'll be no excuse if you die, alright?"

I laughed.

"Great vote of confidence dad." I said, grinning before turning to the warband.

Wiper was looking particularly pissy today. Hah, just because your older doesn't mean I can't knock you out.

"You done?" He asked, no real venom in his voice. Even Wiper wasn't going to be giving people any real shit about this kind of thing.

I nodded.

"Let's go."

O-o-o-o-o-o--o-o-oo-o-o-o--ooo-o

With one hand holding my sword and my other a pistol, I shot a man who could barely breathe in the chest.

A massive bang followed, and the man fell back, a gaping hole in his chest making me turn away, sick rising in my throat.

"Aki!" Wiper shouted urgently, and I spun my head before raising my sword to block a strike from a screaming man with curly hair.

Kicking his legs out from under him, I stabbed down into his throat with a shuddering breathe.

"This isn't Heaven, it's Hell!" Cried another blue sea dweller, before the blast of a bazooka followed. I didn't dare look at that particular section of deck.

Finally, the ship was silent.

Quickly and efficiently, the Shandia searched every bit of the ship for useful bits and bobs, meanwhile I took the chance to puke over the side.

The others gave me some space to come to terms with what I just did, until finally I was able to move about the ship and help out.

Dint find much but some useless gold. I took a nice set of bracers and simple earring studs and a bit more gold for later, but otherwise all I found were books.

Hardly worth any extol, but should be good for some entertainment.

It was only while we were leaving that I realized Wyper didn't bother scuttling the ship.

I thought about how Merry would feel, being left to drift until she rotted enough to sink, and I used some grenades to blast a hole in the hull myself.

"A small mercy to a ship's soul." I said when Wyper questioned me, which just made him snort.

O-o-o-o-o---o-o-oo--o-o-o

Over the course of the next few years I quickly adapted to killing people, as much as I may be personally horrified by the fact.

Sometimes Wyper would get this manic look in his eye, and he'd order us to raid Angel Beach or Upper Yard, but every time his ambition was tempered either by Enel's priests or, if he was particularly bored or it looked like we were going to achieve something, Enel would blast several of our number into ash.

Wyper's never ending lust for revenge despite the harm it brought to our tribe finally got to me one night…

o-oo-o-o-o-oo-o-o

At 17 I sat down next to a totem pole towards the edge of our village.

Resting an unopened bottle of wine against the bottom, I chuckled a bit at the sight.

The Shandia didn't practice burying our dead, at least not in modern times. We had been forced to become a migratory tribe, moving from place to place dictated by war or Vearth accessibility.

So, instead of graves, every fallen Shandian had their name carved into the totem pole given pride of place somewhere in our temporary village. If we had to leave and set up a new village, we would either take it with us or come back at some point to retrieve it.

I gazed down at a particular block of names.

Despite my loner tendencies, fighting together in a constant war forges unavoidable bonds.

I uncapped the wine. I'm not a drinker, but I know they were, so I poured one out for them, and hey, if the others on the totem want some, I'm not going to complain.

Leaning back and staring up at the top of the totem pole, where an ancient and worn carving of a Southbird stood, I closed my eyes



"Aki!" A familiar voice called.

I narrowed my eyes. Soon enough Raki came around the corner, bags in her eyes still from our last assault.

"Wyper's calling together another invasion, he's got this plan involving some Seasto- uh" Raki trailed off at my expression, as I stood up and marched right passed her.

I don't know what she's so afraid of, I mean, my fury isn't for her.

It was only as I reached the center that I heard her call out not to do something stupid.

Too late.

"WYPER!" I roared at the sight of him, and he visibly grit his teeth at the sight of me.

"Aki, why aren't you preparing?" He stated, tone cold.

I clenched my fists.

"No, no we aren't doing this again. Our Warriors aren't even properly rested and already you want to throw more of our people to die!" I screamed.

Wyper's face darkened.

"Are you challenging me, Aki?" He said, eyes dead focused.

I took a deep breath. Others have, of course, brought up concerns with Wyper before, but whenever it reached this point they always backed down.

But now, not a week after I had last seen my friends laughing and boasting about their skills, not a week after I had to burn their bodies?

"Yes." I said quietly, and the Shandians gasped around me, stepping away nervously.

Wyper's brow furrowed.

"You know what this means then, right?" He said, and I growled.

"Yes I do, now are you going to man up and face me, or are you going to continue to stand there and look angry?"

I didn't even have any weapons on me right now, but I was too angry to care.

Wyper dropped his bazooka, cracking his knuckles.

"Fine."

The Chief quickly made his way to the front of the crowd.

"Stop this madness!" He cried, but we both ignored him to charge at each other.

I started with a wild punch into his gut, sending Wyper flying into a hut and sending
debris in all directions.

Shit, I'll fix that later.

Crawling of the ruined wall, Wyper used his shooters to
launch himself into a wide sweeping kick, which i ducked under and stopped by grabbing his face and smashing his head into the ground, sending solid cloud flying everywhere and leaving a crater.

Wyper was still for a second, before swinging his legs and kicking me in the side of of chest, making me grunt and leg go.

Wyper got back up, blood leaking from his hair and eyes barely able to stay open, but still. he raise his arms.

Fucking-

I faked a hit, before switching to a series of light punches all over his body, until i ended it with an uppercut to send him flying yet again.

And when he got back up again, i tightened my fists.

I took a deep breath, before letting my anger go.

I need to keep our people safe.

This time I charged, him trying to guard against or dodge my attacks this time, but instead of punching or kicking him i spun around him to wrap my arms under his armpits, and proceeding to flip him over my head.

When he landed on the ground, I pinned him down so he couldn't move to attack anymore.

"Do you yield?" I asked, and he continued to struggle from beneath me.

I've always been the stronger of the two, if just because I was always training my whole life.

He awkwardly raised a bandaged hand, and my eyes narrowed. I could see the bulge of his impact dial in the wrappings.


"Are you sure you want to do that?" I asked, and he grit his teeth before dropping his arm.

"I… yield."

And with that, I was the new war-chief.

Taking my foot off and letting Wyper get to his feet, I glared at the distant speck that was Upper Yard.

"No more raids on the Skypieans, we'll stick with the blue sea ships. That is all."

I glared at Wyper.

"Is that understood?"

He grit his teeth.

"Yes"

o-o---o-o-o-o--o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It was hardly half a year later that the Strawhats were spotted approaching Heaven's gate.

I suppose it's time, then?

O-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

A/N – Sorry for the wait, I was almost done editing the chapter before I had a burst of inspiration, and now Aki's apparently the war-chief. Funny how that happens, huh?
As it were, is the fight scene good enough?
 
Last edited:
Man I can feel the tension and build up. Something to keep in mind is the fact that Haki is a thing. I don't know if your Mc learned any of it but she should have had some training because it's a standard Skypean technique as far as I can tell from the series.
 
-EDIT NOTICE-

I've edited the fight scene between Aki and Wyper to better represent their power levels, Aki was boasting about how she was the strongest in the tribe at 14, after all, though obviously Wyper isn't just going to sit and take it :p

This is due to some discussion on SB
 
I'm using the black theme and as it turns out your text is black. Heh. Heh.

Would he have won the bout if he cheated like he desired to? Would his hands have been broken when she would have to counter him - not just from the impact dial?

It's really nice. Especially cause she managed to intimidate him into not cheating. I wonder what the consequences would have been if he went for it.
 
Last edited:
All the text in chapter 3 is written in black even when I'm using the dark theme for some reason.
 
All the text in chapter 3 is written in black even when I'm using the dark theme for some reason.
then use the normal theme....
actually, that's a pretty dickish thing to say, i'll fix it to whatever is standard after i get home.
EDIT: finally remembered to do it, i think it works now?
 
Last edited:
Chapter 4
Angel of the Sea – One Piece SI

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-

I hummed along to the music in my tone dial headphones as I skated across the sea.

It always surprised me how much I enjoyed such a simple activity. Suppose it's not much different from the concept of skating on a frozen lake for fun, especially with good music.

Just wish I had a wider range, while the Skypieans did invent the music industry, they didnt actually produce much music. What I'd do for some metal, or jazz.

I'd kill multiple people for swing.

Still, Skypiean orchestral, harp, and chior music was among the best I've ever heard, so despite the lack of variety I got by.

Shaking my musings from my head, I focused as the Going Merry came into sight.

Grinning at the symbol of my childhood, halfway there from the horizon I spotted figures come up on deck to look towards me.

When I was a dozen meters away, I lowered my headphones and raised an arm.

"Yo!"

Immediately exclamations of shock sounded out, and I grinned as Sanji immediately cried out.

"It's an angel! I'm ready to be baptized!" He screamed, spinning in place with hearts in his eyes.

"I'm an athei-" Er, actually kind of complicated at the moment, "-I'm not Christian." I corrected my self, before jumping up and landing on their railing.

Immediately making myself comfortable by sitting cross legged, I rested my chin on a fist.

"Just came to see you guys come in. It's one thing to watch your story, it's another to see it in person."

Confused looks were given to me, and I tilted my head slightly.

"Oh, suppose I should introduce myself. The name's Aki, War-chief of the Shandia, at your service Captain Luffy."

Luffy stepped forwards, a serious expression on his face.

"So, are you an Angel?" He asked, and I huffed.

"I'm not nearly so pretentious to call myself something like that, I'm just a Sky Person. Specifically Shandian."

Luffy nodded.

"Do you poop?" He asked.

The entire crew froze from sheer shock, but I nodded back solemnly.

"Yes."

Everyone except Luffy fell back in shock, but before they could recover something tingled my senses.

Glancing upwards, I grinned at a confused looking Sky Knight.

"Yo Gan Fall! Long time no see!" I shouted up at him, and everybody turned to exclaim in shock again at the sight of a man flying on a bird.

Dropping down and turning to me, Gan Fall narrowed his eyes.

"Aki, what is the meaning of this?" The former God demanded, and I shrugged.

"Can't a girl welcome visitors to the White Sea?" I asked, spreading my hands.

"Obviously, but we both know what usually happens to visitors when you get involved."

I laughed slightly, standing up.

"I see my welcome is fading. No, Sanji, don't worry about it. I was just here to get a good look for myself anyway."

Looking over the legendary crew, I smiled and jumped backwards, before righting myself on the White Sea and shooting away.

Now, time to start the plan up for real. This is the day Enel dies.

O-o-oo-o-o-o-o-o-o

On the ship

-

After Gan Fall had explained himself to the Strawhat crew about his services, Nami asked him about Aki, and why Gan Fall was so suspicious of her.

"Oh, that would be because of how, typically, when the Shandia find a pirate crew like yourselves, they kill the crew, ransack the ship, and run off with the spoils." Pointing to the distance, he continued, "Not five minutes ago they sunk a different ship, so I'm wondering what the guerrillas are planning, is all."

Nami hummed thoughtfully.

"But she seemed nice, if overly familiar." Pausing after that, she frowned.

"Wait, how did she know our names?"

o-o—o-o-o-o-o-o--o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

I was meditating when Wyper came into my hut.

"Aki, you sure about this plan?" He asked, making me open my eyes to look at him.

Wyper had taken well to not being in a leadership position anymore. Much of the obvious signs of his stress were abated, less smoking, less constant rage, resulting in a generally calmer man who still fiercely tried his best to help the tribe.

The fact he could devote more time to preserving our history also helped. I'm sure he would be the next chief for that alone.

"Yes, the Strawhat pirate crew will cause a ruckus no matter what happens next, their captain has a unique immunity to Enel's power, so this is our best chance…. and our only chance." I said, muttering at the end, a slight dread filling me.

Even if Enel was to be distracted by Luffy and co, he could still easily throw a few "God's Judgment"s around like nobody's business. But if we didn't intervene, then who knows what slight differences to the timeline would cause havoc to the Strawhat crew, and in return, the Shandia.

We had to perform our invasion soon, the timing would be key.

I glanced out a window to the totem, which stood in the center of the village at the moment.

I'd make sure no more names were added today.

o-o-o-o-o—o-o-o-o-oo-o-o-o-o-

A/N – Sorry for the wait and short chapter, I was having a hard time writing it (who knew how hard it was to write the Strawhats) but I hope the next few chapters come easier.
In return, have an art! (I am an amateur with digital art, so bear with me)


angel_of_the_sea___aki_by_abysskaiser_ddi9utj-fullview.jpg
 
Huh, neat. I like the build up. I'm worried your going to underpower your character as some authors tend to do when trying to keep it from being a "super OC with both sharingan and wood manipulation" but end up making the character weak or even wimpy instead. You haven't really shown these characteristics anywhere other than dialogue though (only chance to beat Enel being specifically Luffy's power) which isn't necessarily wrong but is a hint that your character might be strong for her tribe but this is a relatively early arc and things escalate massively later on.

to summarize; I like your stuff and I'm worried your character is underleveled.
 
then use the normal theme....
actually, that's a pretty dickish thing to say, i'll fix it to whatever is standard after i get home.
EDIT: finally remembered to do it, i think it works now?
It is still black.
You can either cancel formatting by clicking on the text color changing, A symbol, and picking the color that is the X symbol at the bottom right of the tab. Or you can remove all formatting with the Tx on top left.

I feel like her having become the leader has changed the timeline A LOT more than it could possibly be done with deciding to invade or not.​
 
Last edited:
Huh, neat. I like the build up. I'm worried your going to underpower your character as some authors tend to do when trying to keep it from being a "super OC with both sharingan and wood manipulation" but end up making the character weak or even wimpy instead. You haven't really shown these characteristics anywhere other than dialogue though (only chance to beat Enel being specifically Luffy's power) which isn't necessarily wrong but is a hint that your character might be strong for her tribe but this is a relatively early arc and things escalate massively later on.

to summarize; I like your stuff and I'm worried your character is underleveled.
Oh dont worry, there's been enough One Piece SIs who are physically weak, she's definatly strong enough to face of against, say...
sanji or zoro
in an equal fight at least, without any of her dial tricks
 

It is still black.
You can either cancel formatting by clicking on the text color changing, A symbol, and picking the color that is the X symbol at the bottom right of the tab. Or you can remove all formatting with the Tx on top left.

I feel like her having become the leader has changed the timeline A LOT more than it could possibly be done with deciding to invade or not.​
i figured out what i was doing wrong. i was trying to change the background, not the text :p
 
Oh dont worry, there's been enough One Piece SIs who are physically weak, she's definatly strong enough to face of against, say...
sanji or zoro
in an equal fight at least, without any of her dial tricks
So, with her dials, she's stronger than the monster trio? It's one thing to avoid having a weak SI, but I feel like you're going too far in the other direction.
 
Then why is Luffy always the one who faces the BBEGs? Sanji and Zoro always struggle with the top 2 lieutenants, and Luffy faces the boss. They all struggle, so Luffy must be more powerful.
So basically, the protag is an on-tier fight with Luffy right now, but since Luffy has insane growth rates because of D stuff, he'll pull ahead a bit.
 
Then why is Luffy always the one who faces the BBEGs? Sanji and Zoro always struggle with the top 2 lieutenants, and Luffy faces the boss. They all struggle, so Luffy must be more powerful.
So basically, the protag is an on-tier fight with Luffy right now, but since Luffy has insane growth rates because of D stuff, he'll pull ahead a bit.
Those lieutenants have always been close in power to their bosses. Remember when Luffy and Zoro fought each other in Whiskey Peak? They were clearly evenly matched.

And no evidence supports being a D as increasing your power growth. There are some things that it increases, such as willpower, but I don't believe that there is any evidence of it directly increasing the rate of growth.
 
"Sweatdropping"

Please never use this word again, all it does is give your readers cancer.
 
Randomly turned into a female MC mid chapter 2? That is just weird... 0 indications for, every tom-boy indication against, and no tag? I'll frankly state that it just doesn't feel quite honest... I'll keep reading tho, unless I find out it's a forced genderbend, hate reading that confusion and drama. Still think you should just have stated it in the tags/description.

Another minor concern is that in general, women do indeed seem physically weaker than men in One Piece, much like reality. Discluding true freaks of nature like Big Mom, who is basically some sort of naturally mutated giant - There are pretty much 0 top tier players who are female in One Piece. The closest would be Boa, and most of her power comes from a devil fruit - While most of the rest comes from being randomly born with Conqueror's Haki. In terms of pure physical power, it's pretty much not a thing(relatively speaking), further reinforced by the statements from Kuina's father. But these are ofc just plausible canon issues that one can magic away with a soft "AU." To me it feels like the author wants to make the obvious statement, but refuses to for social/political reasons: Men are at an advantage when it comes to physical growth in general, but it's not completely impossible to overcome, or compensate for that. And so while it is much less likely for a woman to ever become a top player, it's not impossible(Big Mom-esque freaks aside).

PS. Sorry for the long speculation, it was perhaps not entirely necessary... But in my defense, your sudden reveal gave me reason to consider all the pro's and con's. So perhaps you can live with it? xD
completely ignoring all the obvious biological bullshittery that goes on in one piece where such factors become null and void with any degree of WillpowerTM, have you noticed the thread hasn't been updated in nearly two years? You necroed my thread to go on a tangent about women being weaker than men in an anime world such as One Piece, really?

If any mods are looking, pls lock the thread to prevent further necro.
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Back
Top