In the realm of animal summons, there is a tanuki missing. It is not where it should be. It is instead tied to a chair in a dark room with a spotlight shining in its face.
"Auuuuuu... please, I didn't do anything to deserve this..." it whimpers in terror.
There is movement in the darkness that the tanuki can not see. "Exactly. Was I not promised a post once a day? Did you not slack off to a post every other day, and then to a post once every few days, and then to once a week? But this time, you go too far!"
Pink eyes flare into existence and continued to glow a bright neon pink. "Auuu!!!"
"Once every few weeks is not acceptable," the tanuki now looks around in desperation as the pink eyes moved forwards. "And I've see how you've been sniffing at other quests like a shameless raccoon dog... oh yes... even now, even now... I've noticed you plotting out a Dalek Quest and a Dark Kingdom Kwest..."
"
Shun Goku Satsu!" "Auuuu......"
A spider comes over with a siren on its back and carries off the tanuki. "Make way for delicious... erm... mostly dead tanuki."
Is this the end for the poor Tanuki? Or will some miracle miko come by at the last minute and save the Tanuki?
Sauce is Naruto anime and not Danbooru.
[X] Taxes and tariffs?
Sakura Bureaucracy -
8d10 → [3,3,5,1,1,10,8,10] = 5 suxx
Accountant Nin -
9d10 → [5,7,8,5,9,6,6,7,1] = 4 suxx
You couldn't let this stand. No, you couldn't.
This stood against everything your father showed you, taught you. Taxation and tariffs were the most vilest of things that strangled trade. More to the fact, they were foreign nins bullying Konoha nins... such a thing was reprehensible!
Breathing in, you focused your mind on what your father had taught you.
This was something you had to do.
Could do.
Would do.
For are you not Haruno Sakura?
Daughter of Haruno Kizashi, the merchant of steel? Were you not trained in the arts of merchanting by your father? Had you not expressed interest in the art of wheeling and dealing with your father alongside the fighting arts by your mother?
You could totally do this.
"E... excuse me," You attract the attention of the jounin who had been talking to each other. "But I think there's been some mistake here, as you appear to have misconstrued the purpose of this journey. You can see this, yes? You are, after all, applying a form related to the importation or exportation as it were of bloodline blessed individuals during a business trip."
"It's fairly obvious that this is a vacation. And as is clearly evident here and in our paperwork, we are on a pleasure trip. As such, every one of those individuals here with bloodline limits are passengers, not crew or active nin, and are thus naturally exempt from taxation as citizens of the Country of Fire. In fact, if you look at the trade treaties between The countries of Fire, Tea and River, you'll see that sub-paragraph B in section 5 and..."
The Kumo nin cuts you off with a sharp wave of his hand after a too quick set of handseals. It's a literal negation of sound from your mouth as you talk, but your words are not heard. Not even by you.
You looked at the Kumo nin in surprise. Was this where hostilities would break out?
The answer appeared to be no as he waved at the ship. "Hey, new girl... looks like you're going to get a chance to shine."
There is a pause and an explosion of smooth before you which rapidly cleared to reveal another Kumo jounin posed in what you were sure was an intimidating stance. It certainly looked impressive. "It appears that there is a merchant who desires..."
She paused in her speech as she turned around and saw you. "Wait... what?"
There was a frown on her face as she turned to look at the Kumo jounin who you had been speaking to. "Is this some kind of joke?"
"Nope," He shook his head. "She started to do that inane babbling that merchants are wont to do, and as you're the certified accountant of the assigned nin, you get to handle this."
"No, seriously, are you telling me that just because I'm the only one who could be arsed to sit through the accounting and general taxation law classes, I have to deal with some mouthy merchant kid," The look the blonde nin directed at the older nin was one that indicated that she wasn't impressed.
There was a simple tiger seal and a wash of chakra from her later, and you found yourself able to talk once more. Or at least be heard. There was an apologetic look from the jounin guards, a quick pat on your head and you were pushed forward to deal with the bureaucratic nin.
Well... you can't say you were expecting this, you had to admit as you looked at the nin with dirty blonde hair gathered into a single braided pig tail at the back. You've heard of going mano-a-mano, in duels between two nins, you just weren't expecting it to be one of words, and over tariffs at that.
"So," She looked at you with lazy eyes. "First generation nin daughter of a merchant?"
You shook your head. "My father is a merchant who used to be a nin, same with mother."
"I see, fair enough," She nodded regretfully. "I don't suppose I could convince you to back down and not dispute the taxes and tariffs? It would make things a lot simpler for everyone, really."
"Well... you could not try to tax everything," You tapped the receipt and went down the inventory. "I mean, you guys even listed the... the... the cat?!? as an luxury and exotic beast worth way more than it could possibly be... There's taxes with skimming and stuff, but this is beyond what you would expect."
"True true... on the other hand, I should note that I could invoke a certain newly passed law in Fire Country," You blinked at the nin, not quite sure where she was going. "I don't think they intended foreign nins using it on a would be merchant from Fire Country, what with it being nins doing border patrol can treat attempts to smuggle precious goods like now, and disputes with a duel."
She looked at you in your eyes. "And miss 'smuggler', you don't get to pick a champion to do the fighting."
Oh... that law, you heard about it and really what kind of asinine idiot would pass it without provisions about it being Konoha nins and foreign merchants, really? Wait... they would need to have it appear fair, you suppose. But they had made... oh right, you were still technically in the border zone between Konoha and those two other countries.
- - -
Pink Blossom Quest - Year 10 Accountant Nin
What Do?
[X] Back down and let Hyuuga-hime and the Konoha jounin get raped by taxes and tariffs?
[X] Continue the tariff dispute, she had to be bluffing. What kind of fool would want to fight a little girl like you?
[X] Try to talk her out of smuggling and tariff dispute. Use your puppy-eye technique!
[X] Write In with some Brilliant Plan!