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Sneaking His Way into the Multiverse (RWBY Jaune, WC-lite mechanics)

Chapter 30: A Song of Fire and Pickle (Part 1) New
A soft boom rang out behind Jaune, followed by the hissing sound of an object shooting upward. Seconds later, the sky behind him bloomed bright.

A signal flare?

Not important. He ran on, eyes trained upward. The forest canopy was growing denser, making it difficult to catch more than fleeting glimpses of red scales and widespread wings. Unlike him, the Rathalos bypassed the need to traverse the uneven ground, and so pulled ahead with every passing moment. It would take him one wrong move to lose the pursuit.

Tattletale had begun screaming, which was very helpful in keeping him on course.

Also, very worrying.

He activated his League Stepper boots—max settings, no gradual climb—and jumped above the trees. That granted him an unobstructed view of the monster a distance ahead, and of a screaming Tattletale aiming a handgun at the monster's talons. She pulled the trigger.

Accompanied by a loud bang, an angry screech shook the sky.

Tattletale continued firing, angling the gun so the bullets would ricochet away from her. Shot after shot struck the Rathalos, yet they failed to do much that Jaune could tell other than angering it further.

Feeling his balance slipping, Jaune released the triggers for the rockets, allowing himself to drop back down. He landed on one of the large tree roots and forged onward, barely paying attention to where he stepped while leaping from one traversable root tendril to the next. Light rocket blasts covered for the occasional slip-ups, and [Third Arm] helped him clear the larger gaps, gradually bringing him lower and lower until once more he raced along the forest floor.

Rapid gunshots prompted him to jump high again. Tattletale was unloading the whole clip in quick succession now, desperate to get free. He missed what happened next, already falling below the treeline, but he spotted the Rathalos pulling into a steep dive.

Not a minute afterward, Jaune broke into a clearing, finding both of them there.

Tattletale—mud-splattered, leaves stuck in her hair, but alive!—was scampering across the rough ground. No longer screaming now, the desire to avoid being turned into lunch kept her focused on running. Behind her, the Rathalos gave chase, far less graceful on its two legs than when it was flying.

Compared to the Hellkite Drake, the wyvern boasted a sleeker form, its red scales vivid and the spikes along the back less pronounced, less aggressive. More… natural?

Licks of flames flickered between its teeth, growing brighter in intensity.

Jaune did not waste a moment. "Hey, ugly! Over here!"

He aimed with his empty hands. From thin air, a machine gun materialized in them, and he held down the trigger. A stream of bullets slammed into the side of the wyvern, chipping the spiky scales.

Uh…

"It's not dying. Tattletale, why isn't it dying ahhhh—!" He dove out of the way in the nick of time, and the fireball flashed on by, the searing heat lingering on his skin to let him know how close it had been.

The smoke cleared to reveal the Rathalos in flight. Banking hard, the monster looped around a tree, emerging on a direct course for Jaune.

In its movements, he saw brutish aggression. Blind animal impulse. It's a beast, not a man. Predictable.

"Okay, I got this," Jaune said, psyching himself up. "Come get me, you overgrown lizard. I'm ready. So ready!"

In answer, a mouth filled with sharp fangs opened wide.

It snapped down on empty air.

Above the wyvern, Jaune soared with boots trailing fire. The gun returned to his Pocket, and he drew Crocea Mors. Sunlight glinted off steel. The blade flipped to point downward.

Wham!

Jaune saw stars as his head met the thick, unyielding trunk of the tree branch above him. Unaccustomed to using the rocket boots in combat, he had neglected to keep track of his position and where the momentum was taking him. Power to the boots cut out, and he dropped out of the sky to land in the dirt with an "Oof!"

And by the time he pushed off the ground, the Rathalos was already way too close.

Its eyes, a gemlike blue, peered down at him with a spark of cunning. The monster possessed enough of an intelligence to know the meaning of victory. Fire bubbled within its throat.

Note to self: flight tactics require full 3-dimensional awareness. If alive tomorrow, practice.

Extra note to self: if not alive tomorrow, don't worry about it.

An inferno burst forth. Jaune hunkered behind his shield in a futile bid for survival.

Just before the fireball hit him, Logy the monster Hunter slid into the space between Jaune and the Rathalos. It was his shield, not Jaune's, which caught the brunt of the attack, the flames splashing onto the near-fireproof Anjanath hide. Biting teeth slammed against the shield in the next instant, stopped by the metal beneath and a body that refused to buckle under the tyrannical weight of the monster.

Jaune blinked to clear his vision. No, he had not seen it wrongly. Somehow, the Hunter endured the collision with an object measuring in the tons. In fact, he was beginning to push it back.

They didn't have Aura here, right? Right?

"Don't worry. Everyone will be here soon!" Logy said.

Who, he wanted to ask, but his voice trailed off as he watched Logy reach for the contraption strapped to his back. A smooth flick of the wrist, and the segments snapped into place. Bone and metal formed one continuous whole.

Oh. That was a lance he's carrying around.

Boom!

And, oh. It's also a gun.

Driven by the explosive shell that had crashed against its jaw, the head of the Rathalos jerked to the side. Jaune and Logy darted away during that opening.

"Space ourselves apart, divide its attention," Logy called out.

With a nod, Jaune heeded the suggestion, and spared a moment glancing behind him to check on Tattletale.

She had stayed within the clearing, and was in the midst of deploying her camouflage cloak. It worked by her first taking it off.

…Again, limitations defined Academy City tech.

Invisibility cloaks did not work as imagined by science fiction movies. Shaken out like a sheet, the cloak stiffened to a flat, rigid shape. Flexible rods hidden along the bottom edge were manually extended to function as anchors, then impaled into the ground to create something resembling an outdoor cinema screen.

A bit more than a mere resemblance, really, since the concept started from that same place. Lights, and the manipulation of it, laid at the core of this technology. Once activated, the white, almost translucent fabric began a gradual process to adopt the colors and shapes of the area behind it, refracting light through embedded optical amplifiers to create the vividness of reality.

The transformation was taking too long. The Rathalos, recovered, flicked its gaze between the Huntsman/Hunter pair and Tattletale. One registered as a threat, the other as easy picking. It made a choice.

Leathery wings unfurled. The Rathalos took flight.

"We have to get it down!" Jaune shouted. He summoned a rifle, popping off another burst of unimpressive gunfire. It was like shooting at a Deathstalker Grimm. The bullets drew flecks of blood at most despite him aiming low at the scaleless underbelly.

Logy called back, "Way ahead of you. Flashpod, cover your eyes!"

Flashpod?

Flashbang! Jaune recalled the earlier lesson and squeezed his eyes shut, turning away. The resulting flare paled in intensity compared to the modern explosive, but was effective enough against naked vision. The ground shook with the impact of the wyvern's fall.

Jaune reopened his eyes to a Rathalos roaring while trying to climb to its feet. The massive head, nostrils spewing flames, swung every which way without seeing. It passed right across the camouflage cloak, now activated in full with Tattletale ensconced behind the screen in a safe position to observe the battlefield.

Without having to worry about her, he could focus on the Rathalos, and this seemed the perfect opportunity to bring it low. Jaune rushed in, drawing his sword… only to screech to a halt at the frantic signals coming from Logy.

"What?"

"Be careful," the Hunter said as the Rathalos swept its spiked tail through the space Jaune would have occupied. "Blind doesn't mean helpless. The big guy's enraged!"

The monster knew it was in a vulnerable state, and lashed out in a storm of talons, tail, and flames to deter would-be attackers. Against that, Logy advanced in cautious steps, and hovered just a bit outside the range of the Rathalos to harry it with quick swipes of the lance, adding in an explosive shell here and there.

Jaune stuck a little closer, sometimes within clawing distance, for better reach. The first hit he managed got the Rathalos on the snout, and failed to even break the scales. All it did was alert the monster of his position, forcing him to take a dive as sharp talons scythed through the air. Rolling under the Rathalos, he then tried an upward swing to scour a line across the chest. It left a cut to mark his most effective attack thus far—too shallow by half.

To his consternation, the blood dripping from the wound stemmed in seconds, scabbing over. Before he could wonder about it, the Rathalos took a hop, intent on trampling him underfoot. Another dive moved him out of danger.

Glancing over to Logy's side of the fight, he noted that the man seemed to have met greater success. Jaune's efforts, at the least, were serving as a decent distraction to keep the Rathalos facing the wrong direction, and the openings allowed Logy to strike with impunity. Each blow of his lance drew out a grunt from the monster, and sometimes fragments of the scales.

Still, nobody could mistake that the battle was going anywhere close to their way.

"Logy, this isn't working. We're scratching it."

"All according to plan, don't lose heart. Rathalos are just tough fellas."

Jaune leveled an incredulous stare at him. "I think this goes a little beyond 'tough.' The thing's as hard as a rock!"

"Are you kidding? The hide of a Rathalos is waaay stronger than that."

"Not helping…" Jaune whimpered.

Logy laughed at his morose expression. "Steady on. Our backup should be here any second now!"

"I hope so, because it's back in action."

With a final headshake, the Rathalos regained its faculties, and turned its baleful glare directly at them. A slight contraction of the neck warned Jaune of what was coming. The jaws unhinged.

A projectile smashed into the open mouth, bursting to release a pocket of water. A second and third shot followed to douse the impending fireball. The remaining flames flew towards Jaune in a weak stream that fizzled out before the halfway mark.

The shooter emerged from the woods, clad in dark leather and a cowboy hat. He held what looked like a portable ballista cobbled together from monster parts. (Why did it have horns sticking out?)

The blond man, who seemed too skinny and underweight to hold his weapon, called over to them. "Startin' the fun without me, Logy? For shame." He then directed a curious gaze at Jaune, but did not comment.

"Reyfer, good timing!" Logy replied. "Where's Linca and Escha?"

"Right here."

Horns must be in vogue, because the woman that crashed through the underbrush wore the skull of a beast with two great, curving horns pointed to the sky. The rest of the skeleton went into her armor, panels of strung-together bones protecting sections of her body. The midriff was left bare. She had better abs than him.

On her shoulder rested a hammer that was really a giant chunk of bone attached to an iron haft. The size of it looked rather comical on her short height, and an eyeball estimate suggested the thing weigh more than her.

Then, after her there arrived a… a cat? In armor? With a knife?

As the newcomers formed up with them, Jaune stared agog at the fluffy, white, long-haired cat wielding a tiny sword. The thing was adorable.

The cat turned to look up at him, and waved.

He nearly died then and there.

"Jaune, my team. Team, Jaune. Ready to show the big guy what for?" Logy asked.

Cat, he thought, dearly wishing someone would explain to him the why's and how's of it. Aloud, he shouted an enthusiastic "Yeah!" along with the rest of them.

The Rathalos beheld the line of enemies arrayed before it, and weighed the risk. By all evidence, it found the odds favorable as, rearing back on its two legs, the wyvern gave a mighty roar.

Logy and the hammer girl named Linca rushed in to meet it head on, while the guy with the ballista—Reyfer—hung back. Seeing the cat, Escha, flanking the monster on one side, Jaune decided to head for the other side, filling the empty spot in the formation.

Midway there, the phone in his pants pocket rang. Picking up the call, he looped the attached strap around his neck so he could talk hands-free.

"Jaune, can you hear me?"

Sliding into position, he summoned a gun with a fresh clip. "Loud and clear. Looks like the Handy Antenna tech works anywhere, not just in the apartment."

The Rathalos flapped its wings, blowing Logy and Linca off their feet. Immediately, Jaune fired off a few bursts around the monster's eyes. None were a direct hit on target, as after the first few shots the Rathalos turned to avoid the barrage, but it had to abandon pursuing the off-balanced Hunters in order to do so. That gave them the chance to resume their offensive before the wyvern could chase him. Linca smacked it upside the head with her hammer as it tried to breath fire.

Using the free moment, he addressed Tattletale, "Hey, do you have an idea of what's wrong with these guns? And my sword? Like, I'm tickling the Rathalos right now."

"It's not a fault on your end. Forget bulletproof jackets, those scales are the equivalent of inches-thick steel. Not just that, but the muscles underneath, the bones, they all have to be in comparable range to shrug off those attacks. The strength of that monster in relation to its size is disproportionate to a ridiculous degree."

And it already looked big to begin with. Great.

"Don't even think about engaging it head on."

"Wasn't going to."

"Uh-huh." Skepticism dripped from her voice. "Your best bet is to continue playing the distraction. Support the Hunters, and study what they do before you commit to anything rash. They're the pros, not you."

That was actually good advice, and in between bursts of gunfire, he observed his allies for hints to the finer points of monster hunting.

Despite their heavy armaments, the two main melee fighters on the team stayed light on their feet. They didn't plant themselves in one spot and go to town on the monster, even though Logy likely could have with his shield and fire-resistant gear.

At first, Jaune thought it a mirror to conventional Huntsmen combat styles. As the minutes wore on, he revised that opinion.

After ducking a swing of the tail, Logy had the perfect opportunity to lay into the Rathalos. He forwent it, and skipped back. His partner, Linca, could have gone for a truly skull-shaking overhead swing. That was given up, too.

The Hunters were not displaying the aggression typical in Huntsmen. Offensive undertakings rarely lasted for longer than three or four attacks before they broke off from the Rathalos. Oftentimes, Logy or Linca would settle for a single glancing blow.

Was it borne of caution? Fear? Not quite.

Reyfer, safer from his spot at the back, shared the mannerism. His ballista fired at an uneven rate—a three-shot burst here, a lone one there. He took frequent pauses, picking and choosing projectile bolts that bore a variety of effects, from a purple cloud to sparks to sharp spikes that attempted to pierce the scales. Every once in a while, he relocated to a new spot. Always near cover. Always at a set distance.

The strange ease to their movements spoke of practice. Experience taught them to fight this way.

Tattletale's voice came over the line. "They're conserving stamina. Targeting weakpoints. Jaune, slow down. You're out of step with their goal here."

Because a Rathalos was not a Grimm, and Hunters were not Huntsmen. A creature of flesh and blood, it can tire; lacking Aura, they can die. The flowing dance of offense and evasion ensured a constant barrage to wear the monster down, while minimizing the risk of a Hunter taking a debilitating injury. Considering the ludicrous level of toughness possessed by the Rathalos, decisive blows were off the table. He compared it earlier to a Deathstalker Grimm, which was not so far off the mark. Unlike Beowolves and Ursas, where one untrained but powerful slash can kill the creatures, whaling on this armored body accomplished not much of note. Striking a weakpoint achieved better outcomes for the effort expended.

Jaune began spacing out his shots, taking the time to put them where he saw the Hunters aiming. The ankles, to weaken its balance. The wings, to strain the smaller, more delicate bones, and tear at the wing membranes. The head he left to Linca, the hammer wielder. Her method to use a giant lump of monster bone to rattle another monster's bones seemed to be going well, whereas his bullets were useless on that skull.

His plan, uh, his plan worked a little too well.

Jaune gulped as the Rathalos, thoroughly annoyed by the gnat that won't stop buzzing about, focused on him. An angry blast of fire exploded from its throat.

[Third Arm] yanked him one long step to the left. Another fireball was there, because it wanted him dead, with a side of deader. With no time to think, he activated his boots and threw out another shadowy hand. A little voice in his head was screaming that either would be too late.

A shelling round struck him first. It hurt like hell. It hurt like fuck.

But it also launched him out of the path of the fireball.

He hit the ground on his back a short distance away, arms curled around his chest and a chunk of his Aura missing. It was better than being set alight, he tried to tell himself. Strangely, that did not at all make him feel better. Woozy eyes found the person responsible.

Logy sent him a thumbs-up, smiling.

"I got you, Jaune!"

You sure did.

"Tattletale, our ally just shot me. Maybe you were right about him."

"Ehhh." She sounded hesitant. "I think—no, it's definitely something normal for them. His teammates didn't even flinch when they saw that." Her speech shifted, becoming faster. "He's done it before. To them. He fired on them and they're still friends. The maneuver is part of their playbook. Their physiology allows for that kind of strategy. That girl's hammer is three hundred pounds on a stick, and he's swinging a lance with one hand. They should be breathing hard—they're not. This is the human baseline, and it's comparable to a person with Aura. Big insects—big trees—big everything. This is a worldwide effect."

They say you were what you ate. Perhaps this was that old adage in action. Whatever super nutrients giving the monsters their strength found its way into people's diet, and imparted to them the same unbelievable vitality. In a world like that, tanking a shell fired by one of their own may well count as a valid strategy to rescue a teammate, the damage recoverable with a draught of healing potion.

It sounded insane.

And made so much sense! Why hadn't he ever thought of that sort of strategy back in Beacon? Aura can mimic the requirements, as proven with him!

(He later realized why, upon recalling that Nora's weapon was a grenade launcher.)

"Sooo, how does that explain the cat?"

"…I'm working on it."

"Oi. What's takin' so long over there?" asked Reyfer in a rough drawl, hurrying over.

Climbing to his feet, Jaune said, "Oh, sorry—"

"Did that darn Rathalos get you, after all?" Reyfer scrambled for his belt. "Here, I have a potion. A mega potion, too, if you need—actually, drink it anyway, just in case. Come on, if you're hurt bad, I'll carry you from the fight while that thing's distracted."

"Omigod they're all like that." Tattletale sounded ill.

Arms full of medicine jars and herb pouches, Jaune rapidly shook his head. "No, no, no, no, I'm good. Completely fine. Logy took me by surprise, that's all." He tried to return the items to no avail, with Reyfer waving him off and rushing back to the battle now that he was assured of Jaune's health. Reluctantly, he deposited them in his Pocket.

A second flashpod stymied another attempt by the Rathalos to fly. This time, though, it landed on its feet and quickly set into a wild, thrashing frenzy.

A ballista bolt alerted it of Reyfer's presence, and it charged in his direction, forcing him to abandon his position with a long roll that covered quite a distance. The Rathalos skirted on by the escaping prey to slam against a tree, snapping the thick trunk almost in half with how hard it struck, afterward dropping to the ground in a stunned daze.

All of a sudden, a flip switched, and the monster Hunters sprinted for the downed foe.

Now they went all out. Logy unloaded shell after shell, reloading and doing it all over again. Reyfer changed to bladed projectile bolts, and directed them at the tail; those saw great effect, leaving grooves that refused to heal. Meanwhile, right in front of the Rathalos, the hammer rose and fell, each blow stronger than the last as its wielder found her rhythm.

Jaune heard a distinctive cracking sound after one of the hammer strikes landed. His heart swelled with anticipation. The monster was not invincible.

Once his current gun ran out of bullets, Jaune traded it for his sword, and dashed forward into melee range.

Logy greeted him with a grin. "Jaune, Reyfer's softened up the tail! Finish the job!"

He didn't have to say it twice. Jaune hacked at the open wound with abandon. Crocea Mors felt more akin a dull knife against the tough flesh of the monster, but he kept at it to do his part, sawing through the tail inch by agonizing inch.

Even the cat pitched in, sitting on the back of the Rathalos with a hammer and a chisel in its paws. One, two, three, four scales were pried away in succession.

Everyone paused as a roar that did not belong to the Rathalos rang across the forest. There was a desperate pitch to it, a whine of want so stark that it bordered on madness.

"What was that?" Jaune asked once it faded.

Logy furrowed his brow, lance never ceasing in its movement, "I don't know, but it sounded like Linca when she's hungry." Nods all around, even from Linca. Logy bit his cheek, looking a tad anxious. "It's far off. We should be fine."

They resumed their onslaught against the Rathalos. It had begun stirring, but a glance at the others told Jaune that they were committing to this until the very last possible second.

Good. He had no intention of stopping at this point. That tail was a sliver from being down to the bone now. Feverishly, he chopped at it, putting his whole body into the motion.

The Rathalos jerked awake, screaming, the moment he sawed into the bone of the tail.

The forest answered with another roar.

It sounded closer now. Like, a lot closer. Jaune might be imagining things, but the rousing Rathalos seemed very aware, and very hostile about that development, attempting to disengage from the Hunters to move in that direction.

Which was great, because the monster probably would have gone for him first otherwise.

"This is bad."

No, it's great. "Tattletale, the monster making that noise…"

"Is coming straight for us."

Trees started falling. Further away in the beginning, patches of the canopy vanishing as tremors ran through the earth. Then whole sections went down. In the murky depths of the jungle, they saw thee trunks shoved aside with ease, and the shape of something…massive.

Reyfer the gunner was the first to call it quits, folding his ballista into a more compact form. "Pack it up. Everybody, pack it up! Turf war incoming!"

Linca tch'ed, but heeded the advice. Logy fired one last potshot with his lance, then retreated. At the edge of the clearing, Tattletale was pulling up the cloak from the ground, clipping it back on her.

Jaune held no notion of defiantly pushing onward, not when the Huntsman equivalents of this world was running. He turned to follow, making it two steps before he snapped around again.

The cat. Where was it?

He spotted it still atop the Rathalos, paws clamped around a loosening red scale. It was yanking on the piece with all its might.

Logy had noticed the same scene. "Escha!" he yelled. "We need to get outta here!"

Everyone (except Tattletale) had stopped in their tracks. The whole team (except Tattletale) turned back. Decisions were being made, Jaune could read it on their faces. Weapons appeared in hands. They were going to go back for the cat.

Too late.

The second monster arrived, and the Rathalos shot into the air with Escha clinging to the loose scale. It started blasting fireballs, one after the other. All Jaune saw was a flash of green and too many teeth, before smokes obscured the newcomer. The Rathalos refused to relent in the onslaught until only faint sparks remained within its mouth.

That's when a huge maw erupted out of the inferno. It swallowed the final fireball, continued on, and would have clamped shut hard on the Rathalos had it not twisted its neck out of the way, losing a chunk of flesh rather than the entire throat. Batting its wings, the Rathalos gained altitude at speed.

Emerging in full, the monster—the T-Rex—glared at the wyvern through crimson eyes.

Jaune thought the Rathalos was big. This creature measured thrice the size, colored green from tip to tail. Slobber poured out in long trails from a mouth overfilled with teeth, to the point that the teeth left the mouth to grow on the chin and snout.

The stubby forearms almost looked comical on the monster. Then it unhinged its jaw, and any idea of laughing at it went out the window. The monster could swallow a car in one gulp. Or half a dozen people along with their gear.

In a breathless murmur, Linca said one word. A name. "Deviljho."

The two monsters crashed together, and from then on, the humans ceased to matter. Forces of nature clashed in a struggle that broke the land.

Trees uprooted. The ground tore up. Spewing flames with wild abandon, the Rathalos engulfed the clearing in fire, avoiding the hungry, snapping jaws as its talons carved deep gouges in the sides and back of the Deviljho. In turn, the Deviljho swung its head, toothy snout bashing into the Rathalos with the power of a freight train. It would leapt high after the wyvern, each landing followed by an earthquake. Twin roars drowned out the forest for miles around.

The Hunters ran pell-mell with never a single moment to swing their weapons. Mere ants beneath the feet of giants, this wasn't their world anymore.

Throughout it all, a cat jumped from the back of one monster to the other, its throat locked in terror. Time and again, it tried to escape the battle altogether, stymied in whichever avenue it took by the biting, slashing, and wrestling titans that got in the way. Simple luck kept it from missing a footing thus far.

As it once more scampered along the spine of Rathalos, that luck ran out. The Deviljho caught its foe by the neck, and twisted to throw the Rathalos end over end. The sudden rotation flicked the cat through the sky.

Jaune judged the direction, the distance, and then he latched [Third Arm] onto a branch to slingshot him past the tree into the air. Rockets took over, accelerating him further. A twist of his body puts him facing his target, and he flung out both arms to catch the cat.

He had never seen a cat smile before. It was adorable.

"Thank you!" Escha cried, hugging him.

She can speak!

Jaune nearly faceplanted in the dirt upon landing, too taken aback by the talking cat. Higher-pitched than a human, her voice carried the slight rasp of a cat's meows. (He couldn't believe that the voice carried anything except a cat's meows!)

"Jaune, did I hear someone else talking? I thought everyone was accounted for."

"Did you include the cat?" he asked weakly.

"...Excuse me?"

The cat was now staring at the phone hanging from Jaune's neck, jaw dropped open in awe. "How are you doing that?"

"Uhhh, interdimensional whimmy whammy stuff. It's—" Jaune looked past the feline, and paled. "Not the time. We need to go!"

Man and cat fled before they could be squashed flat by the struggling Rathalos that the Deviljho swung around like a flail. Spotting their allies waving to them at the edge of the clearing, they headed thataway, chasing after the group as they found shelter among some bushes set far inside the treeline, with Tattletale already there. Escha outran him, dropping to the ground to speed ahead on her four limbs, and she dove into an embrace comprising all the Hunters.

Jaune arrived to much rejoicing, and hearty slaps on the back that registered against his Aura. Since he had apparently put his life on the line to get one of their own out of danger, that seemed to have made him their new best friend.

It's a pretty nice feeling.

A weight settled on his back, squishy paws clinging onto his head. Escha's face swung into view a moment later, upside-down in front of him. "Hey, hey, how did you fly? And what did you mean, interdi-meow-sional whatsit? Who are you!?" Her face grew closer and closer with each question, eyes practically sparkling

The rest of the Hunters also voiced their curiosity. Logy was the sole local person to have seen his rocket boots in action before, and everyone now wanted to hear about it, along with the guns (they had gunlances and bowguns, but not gun-guns), his mechashifting shield (they, unlike many, understood the appeal of a portable weapon form), and his clothes (Hunters were somewhat fashion-minded, it seemed). He fielded them as best he could, which consisted for the most part of him attributing to interdimensional shenanigans all the minor details he was not quite sure about.

Once he extricated himself from the slew of questions, aided by the awe-inspiring sight that was the ongoing battle between two monsters, Jaune sidled over to Tattletale.

"Hey, did you get out of that mess okay?" he said.

"Yeah…" Her reply lacked spirit, and with a closer look, Jaune soon noticed the usual signs of a budding headache on her. Squinted eyes, a clench to her jaw, peace and quiet in her immediate vicinity, and so on.

Frowning, he said, "If you need to, why not shut your power off for a while? You're overdoing it."

"Actually, can I get a Remedy?" she asked hopefully. Before he could answer, she continued in a rush. "You know what, nevermind. I'm totally A-okay right now."

The one twitching eye suggested otherwise. Reading his micro tics to deduce the (very valid in his opinion) concerns about her growing reliance on the Remedies would only serve to exacerbate the headache she suffered, but warning the girl of things like that tended to never go far with her. He hesitated on whether to bring out a vial for the pain anyway, in the end deciding that she had already made known her resolve to not use one, which was ultimately a development he should encourage.

Their conversation tapered off after that, the pair returning their attention to the scene in the clearing.

The Deviljho had the Rathalos gripped in its mouth, but the Rathalos had in turn dug its talons deep into the base of the Deviljho's neck and was doing its best to pull in opposite directions, the two monsters engaged in a bout of mutually attempting to rip the other's head off. It locked them in a stalemate, a green tower pointed to the sky capped by a red roof. The creaking of bones, and the sound of gnawing teeth, could be heard loud and clear in this corner of the jungle now depopulated of wildlife.

Then, the balance shifted. The Deviljho, uncaring of its wounds, jerked to the side. Talons tore ribbons of flesh as they were pulled out by force, and the Rathalos scrabbled for new purchase.

With a whole-body twist, the Deviljho swung the other monster high above its head, and slammed it down. The ground cratered beneath the Rathalos, the moment of impact more akin to a missile strike. One of the legs landed wrong with a break that pierced the skin, leaving the monster lying collapsed, unable to climb upright. The mouth fell open, gasping for air as the winner of the bout released the grip on its neck.

The victorious cry of the Deviljho, shouted to the heaven, proclaimed to all and sundry its might.

That was its mistake, because in a flash, the Rathalos pulled a last gambit. The wings had survived intact, the flying wyvern protecting them by wrapping the appendages tight to its frame. They unfurled in a snap to bat the Deviljho in the jaw. Driving the broken leg into the ground, the Rathalos forced itself to stand. Frantic beats of the wings lifted it in the air, narrowly avoiding a bite from below as it withdrew out of range.

It circled once, and wailed its anger towards the winner in a keening cry. Then it flew away.

That might have been the worst outcome of all, to the Deviljho. It screamed, and screamed, and screamed at the Rathalos. A tantrum followed, the monster battering down trees and—for whatever reason that made sense only to it—bit huge mouthfuls of dirt out of the ground and spat them back out.

The fit continued for a good few minutes, but upon realizing that the other monster wasn't coming back, it… well, it didn't calm down, but it stopped flipping out and began to focus on searching the ground in agitation.

"What is it doing?" Jaune asked in a murmur. The group had ducked low ever since the battle ended, hiding deeper in the bushes. They peered out through the leaves at the monster.

Linca answered, "I've heard of this species. They are supposed to be always hungry. And angry. A carnivore that kills and eats whatever living thing is in sight—"

The monster passed its gaze over their hiding place, and on instinct they fell still, stifling their breaths.

The gaze moved on, completing a full circuit of the clearing. Once that was done, the Deviljho shouted another roar full of rage, before stalking off to seek new prey.

Linca resumed talking. "It's said something went wrong inside them long ago, that they were never able to recover from. They would eat their own tail if there is nothing else available. Eat until they kill themselves." She pulled a face, though the skull helmet that covered the upper half of it made the expression difficult to read. "We should hunt it," she concluded.

Jaune ran the conversation back in his head, wondering if he had missed a detail. Nope.

"Aaaand why would you want to do that?" he asked.

Tattletale cut in before Linca could answer. "These Deviljho guys eat too much, right? I bet that would wreck the local populations of whatever area they settle in. And if they self-cannibalize, it's probably hard to find remains of an intact specimen out in the wild to study."

"Pretty much," Logy spoke up, nodding. "Deviljho is incompatible with all known environments, and our researchers would love to get their hands on that treasure trove, especially since this is the first Deviljho I've ever heard of in the New World." He rubbed his chin, mulling on matters.

Escha hopped onto Logy, gathering everyone's attention. "Hey, hey, so does that mean we're letting the Rathalos go?" she asked innocently.

The Hunters halted at those words, staring at the cat as if it had started talking grown two heads.

"You mean, drop the hunt?" Logy lowered his voice to a whisper at the end. An instinctive, visceral reaction to an alien concept. Linca mirrored the expression, yet Reyfer looked to be giving serious thought to the suggestion, working through it slowly to grasp the nuances of this novel approach.

"You've got the Rathalos on its last leg." Tattletale pointed out in agreement, then switched sides. "On the other hand, that Deviljho is valuable. One belongs to a species that will be plentiful in the future, but the other's a tough customer that you may not have the resources and energy to fight." She crossed her arms, shaking her head in sympathy. "It's a toughie."

The Hunters looked at her, looked at each other, and broke into fierce arguments.

Jaune slapped a hand over his face. He muttered out the corner of his mouth, "You meant for that to happen."

"I don't know what you're talking about." Tattletale smiled impishly. "So, which monster would you want to go after, Jaune? If the Rathalos wasn't what we're here for, I mean."

"Both."

She quirked a delicate eyebrow. "Bold of you." Stupid of you, she probably intended. "Any reason?"

Jaune gave a shrug.

"I dunno. Two monsters translate to twice the reward, I guess."

As one, the Hunters spun towards him, fingers pointing.

"""You're a genius!"""

Tattletale's smile grew stiff.



Author's Notes: Early chapter. One left to round out this world.

Tattletale—Oh, Jaune~ I've been captured by a big, wicked dragon~
Jaune—*arrives late*

Cat—*
stuck in a high place*
Jaune—*
locks in*
 
Chapter 31: A Song of Fire and Pickle (Part 2) New
A group of four hiked up a tree root large enough to accommodate two-way car traffic. It was one of the traversable routes mapped out by past Hunters of the Guild, and led all the way to the top of the ancient tree that was more akin to a mountain.

Near the head of the party, Jaune turned over his shoulder—his third time in the last minute—to take in the view. How high were they, now? A thousand feet? More?

His spot offered a spectacular vantage point. There was the forest below, rolling on and on. It gave way to deserts, canyons, then the crags and cliffs of a volcanic land beyond, with crystals the size of buildings rising from the rocks. To his left, far in the horizon and near the sea, he saw a forest of corals, the remnants of an ocean floor in aeons past, exposed aboveground as the seas receded. The reef was yet alive, an explosion of colors in every shade of the rainbow.

Logy had pointed out Astera for him. It's a settlement along the coast. Not that far, but still at a distance where he had difficulties telling the details. There's something like a boat sitting on a rock? Oddly-shaped, was all he could say for sure about Astera.

If he focused, he could spy the tiny, tiny forms of monsters roaming amidst the disparate biomes. They must tower over a man in person, to be visible from here. Some flew in the sky, some raced along the ground. Far away from his adventure, they clashed, and hunted, and lived. What a world he had stumbled upon.

"Hey, hey, whatcha thinking about?"

He turned back to the path. Escha crouched there, the steep incline putting her at eye height. The cat—or felyne, rather, as they were known here—tilted her head in curiosity.

"Just looking," he said. "Everything here is new to me. It's—"

"Amazing? Pretty? Stupendous?"

"Heh. All of that, I think."

Escha broke out in a beaming smile.

A cooing noise arose behind him, choked off midway with a fake cough. Tattletale drew level with the group a moment later, clearing her throat and refusing to meet his eyes.

She had been quite taken by the fluffy furball that talks.

"Quit dilly-dallying, Jaune. We have a timetable to keep."

"Yeah, but, you know…" He added a hop to his next step and rocketed forward, clearing a few yards in one stride. Turning on the heels of his boots, he took a bow, calling back to her, "I think I'm okay on that front."

The slowpoke flipped him off. He smiled and waved at her.

Past her, down in the forest, he caught a flash of sickly green among the greens. The Deviljho, still on its eternal rampage to seek sustenance. Linca and Reyfer should be engaging it right about now, harrying the monster to weaken it while waiting for a sign of their success up here.

That rather depended on them locating the Rathalos, and once more he checked the Olfactory Sensor. The signal strengthened as he pointed the tracker above them, confirming they had a while longer to go before reaching its hiding place. It wouldn't be at the very top, Logy had speculated. The scent of the former apex monster still lingered there, proclaiming for every would-be claimant to the throne that the king of the jungle died in that place. No, they'd be cautious. Staying lower until they developed the strength and arrogance to consider themselves unbeatable.

The first to catch up to him was Escha, who clamored for another look at the screen of the tracking tool. He wasn't sure if she understood what all the data presented on it meant, but he let her see anyway, the felyne meowing in wonder as she directed him to move the device this way and that.

How he recognized it was 'wonder' and not, say, a random meow spoke to the expressiveness of the felyne species. They're… well, they're not pets. Felynes were a sentient people. People who, yes, happened to enjoy scritches. They also liked the same foods that humans ate, slept in houses (though what constituted a house differed in their mind), and even took jobs to get paid. Escha referred to herself as a Palico with the pride that someone would say they were a Huntsman or Huntress.

She enjoyed flying, too, and latched onto his back the next time he rocket-stepped, afterward jumping off to land on a thinner tree root running parallel to the path at waist height. As they waited for the others, she pelted him with questions about anything and everything that she could think of on the wider universe.

"How big do the big monsters get?"

"Massive, sometimes." The Grimm Dragon came to mind. "Although there aren't always monsters at all." Escha blinked in surprise at that, as did Logy who had just joined them. "Some places I've been to have them. Some didn't."

"Places?" Escha asked, confused at first. Then, her eyes opened wide, and she stretched her body to lean closer. "You mean, you've been to more than your world and this one!?"

Jaune replayed their conversations since ascending the tree. "Huh. I guess I never told you. But yeah, my method lets me go to multiple universes. I've visited, what, seven or eight worlds in total now? Hey, Tattletale," he addressed the approaching girl while rechecking his mental count, "how many worlds have we been to?"

"Discounting that one that we spent, like, five minutes inside? Nine for you, eight for me," she answered while gamely waving for them to resume the journey, nevermind her heavy breaths.

"Weird. I counted eight for myself. My world, yours, Dunwall, Undead Burg, bunny cave, Steelport, Academy City, and here. What's missing?"

For a person half a head shorter than him, Tattletale somehow managed to look down her nose at Jaune. The corner of her mouth quirked upward with a hint of satisfaction. "Our apartment is in its own universe."

"That's the one!" he exclaimed, smacking a palm to his forehead. "I keep forgetting since we haven't stepped a single foot outside the room. One of these days, we really need to figure out that teleporter."

"Maybe. I see us affording a new base of operation before that becomes a necessity, so it doesn't matter much to me."

More like she's miffed that all her attempts at getting it to work were stymied and she never wanted to look at the contraption again, but Jaune wasn't going to tell her that.

"Nine worlds…" muttered Escha, still stuck on that bit of news. From her tone, she couldn't believe it.

Meanwhile, Logy focused on the other part of Jaune's revelations. "So monsters aren't common elsewhere. How about that." He wore a thoughtful expression on his face as he strolled along the path, one that had Tattletale raising an eyebrow. Neither chose to comment further, however.

They found their target, as Logy surmised, about three quarters of the way to the top, in a hollow that was better described as a cavern considering they could fit a house, a yard, and a thousand garden gnomes in here—which would be kind of creepy now that he was picturing it in his head. Analogies were hard.

Hiding behind the corner, they peeked inside to see a half-built nest tucked into the depths of the space. The sleeping form of the Rathalos laid atop it.

Escha ducked low to the ground, as if it would make her less noticeable. With utmost seriousness, she warned them, "Be vewy, vewy quiet."

Tattletale nearly woke the monster up then and there by breaking into laughter, clamping both hands over her mouth in the nick of time. She shook with the force of her mirth, eyes closed and face turning a shade of red.

Everyone stared at her.

After a beat, Escha asked, "Why is she laughing?" She looked to Jaune for an answer, and he spread his hands in helpless silence. Nothing had seemed amiss insofar as he recalled, so he could not even begin to guess.

"W-W—" Tattletale struggled to speak, and managed to force the words out in a rush. "We're hunting Wathalos!" She then fell into another fit of muffled snickering.

But they were, though…

Shaking his head, Jaune said, "Okay, Tattletale. You stay here and… and try to snap out of whatever it is that's setting you off. We're going to get closer to the Wa- Rathalos."

Doubling over in renewed laughter, all Tattletale could do was acknowledge him with a thumbs-up, the other hand pointing to the pouch where she kept her phone. Call me.

"Got it," he said.

Once again, the phone hung off of his neck, the soft giggles of his partner filtering through it as he advanced alongside Escha and Logy further into the hollow. They moved with care, avoiding the bones of past meals to reach a better vantage point where they could study the monster.

"Thing's in pretty bad shape," Jaune said.

The Rathalos breathed in laboured gasps, and blood covered the once pristine scales. Gouges littered the body of the monster, ripped by the teeth of Deviljho.

He indicated the misshapen bones on a shoulder, muttering low, "One of the wings looks done for after the flight here. A weakpoint?"

"Don't bank on that," came Tattletale's voice through the line. "The wounds all over it, did they stop bleeding?"

Checking, he noted that, for the most part, yes it has. The copious amounts of blood smeared on its body weren't flowing like he would expect, hardening within the many wounds to form—not quite scales—but something tougher than mere wounded flesh.

"I can see the tail from here, and that's the only part yet to staunch. There are scraps of a recently eaten animal. Eating, and sleeping. Is it… healing?"

Logy nodded, too unfamiliar with phones to realize that Tattletale wouldn't see it. "Bioenergy. It's especially strong in the New World. A few days of hunting, and the Rathalos will be right as rain."

"Then it might decide to fly on a bum wing anyway, since that will fix itself with time. Jaune, I want you to focus on the tail."

"Because it's an open wound?"

"Exactly. The damage is too much for it to come back from. Worsen that, and it'd waste the 'bioenergy' on something it can't fix. Chase it, and don't let up."

"You know, it's sleeping. Unmoving. That's the perfect chance to hit hard. I have a—"

She had already read ahead of his thoughts, being the one to assist in organizing his equipment. "Might not be enough. Those scales could mute the impact. Keep it in reserve for a good opportunity, and whittle the monster down. That's the surest method here."

Conceding the point, he drew his sword, while Logy prepared his gunlance. They moved to opposite ends of the Rathalos.

Escha hovered between them, prepared to aid either one. Despite the felyne-sized sword she held, her position as a Palico was geared more towards support for Hunters. According to her proud explanation, Palicoes fought when times called, but they excelled at gathering materials, applying medicines mid-fight, distracting the foe, and a host of other minor roles that allowed the monster Hunters to perform better on a hunt.

What she didn't know, was that Logy informed him on the quiet that the felyne had a penchant for the material gathering part, often to her own detriment, and if Jaune would please keep an eye out for that problem and pull her out of trouble like he did previous, then the Hunter would appreciate it.

At the mouth of the cave, Tattletale waved to him. He signaled back his readiness. She repeated the process with Logy, presumably receiving a similar reply, and proceeded to hold up a hand, fingers splayed. They lowered one by one in a countdown. As the last finger curled, Jaune raised his sword, and chopped at the exposed bone of the tail with all his strength at the same time he heard a shell explode on the snout of the Rathalos.

The monster roused with a roar that shook the cavern, and the fight was on.

Jaune used the opening seconds to the fullest, raining blows on the same spot while the Rathalos was still getting its bearings. The tail swung to the side in a bid to escape the pain, and when that did not work a full-body roll followed to carry the monster out of the nest.

He doggedly chased after the Rathalos as it climbed to its feet. Directly in front of the monster, Logy targeted the head, darting in to slam his lance on the cracked skull, disorienting the Rathalos with each careful swing. Jaune timed his attacks with these moments, shaving the bone thinner slice by slice. The monster had lost much of its control on the tail, and so the clumsy retaliatory sweeps of the limb, along with the wyvern's blind kicks behind it, did almost nothing to hold Jaune at bay.

Thus, soon, his persistence attracted the attention of the Rathalos. Seeing it starting to turn, he dashed in the same direction, sticking to the rear of the monster as it pivoted around. Talons raked thin air, leaving a confused monster to search for its prey. A sharp pain on its tail alerted it, as Logy bashed his gunlance against the damaged bone, cracking it further for Jaune to saw off an additional inch with his blade. With a snarl, the monster twisted his way again, leading with a headbutt.

Logy skipped back, but Jaune caught the full brunt of it. The battering ram of a good two tons met his shield to send him flying to the far wall of the hollow, where he slammed against what felt more akin to concrete than wood, the air blasted out of his lungs.

Gravity peeled him off the wall, and he dropped to the ground.

"Are you alright!?" shouted Tattletale through the phone.

Meh.

The pain was fine, he had experienced worse. Except, woozy, he could only answer with incoherent mumbles, laying there as he tried to get his breath back.

Her state of fright was growing, which he didn't like.

Then, a jar filled with a golden liquid smashed into his face, shattering to splash him with the contents. Drops of it hit his tongue, sending a jolt of energy through him that had Jaune sitting upright with a gasp, inhaling a lungful of air.

"WHOOOO!"

Whatever was in that, it felt like he chugged a pitcher of coffee.

A second jar bonked him on the head, this time covering him in green healing potion, likely intended to heal the bruise that the jar-thrower thought they gave him, not accounting for Aura dampening the blows. He wanted to ask the point of giving a person an extra whack before healing them, but he supposed it was the thought that counts, so he raised a thumbs-up toward the culprit, Escha, receiving one back with her paw in acknowledgment. Bouncing up, he scooped his sword off the ground.

In his absence, the Rathalos had focused on Logy, and Jaune capitalized on the chance to rush back into the fray. An application of [Third Arm] dragged him under the monster and out the opposite side, back in his original spot.

One hit on the tail, and the Rathalos shrieked in anger. The source of its pain just wouldn't leave.

Leathery wings spread wide, taking the Rathalos into the air. Its mouth fell open, gasping with each clumsy flap hampered by misaligned bones and torn wing membranes, but sheer stubborn will got it staying aloft. The ceiling of the hollow was high enough that the monster hovered out of weapon reach. Sparks built between its teeth.

Jaune watched carefully for where the fireball would land, prepping his escape methods.

In an odd maneuver, the Rathalos tucked its head under a wing, facing none among the group.

"Jaune! It's coming for you!"

He grinned. Good to know. "Thanks, Tattletale."

"Yea—don't stop moving!"

He had been in motion when he heard her, rocket-stepping to the side as the Rathalos launched its attack. Not quite understanding the why of it, he nevertheless heeded the warning to keep the triggers pressed, zooming across the ground. It was a good thing he did, because the Rathalos had not spat a fireball, but a long stream of flames that criss-crossed after him.

Light taps against the cavern floor adjusted the trajectory of his rocket boots, letting him escape from the path of the flames time and again, yet the sensation of heat remained on his back. In rage, the Rathalos pushed beyond its normal limits, scorching its own throat, weathering the explosive shells Logy shot from below, all to kill him. Smoke and fire began to drift throughout the space, weighing on their breath, obscuring their sight, wood catching alight.

A boomerang smacked the monster on the nose with a thwack, making it flinch. The beam of destruction, thankfully, cut out.

"Hey, red and angry! Pick on someone your own size!" shouted Escha, four paws extended wide to make herself look as big as possible. Mighty meows resounded to intimidate her foe.

Despite the situation, Jaune had to bark a laugh at her boast, and as the Rathalos sluggishly banked around to roast the felyne, he zipped on by to scoop her up and take them both out of harm's way. A fireball landed behind them.

"Thanks for the save," he said, getting a happy nod from the Palico in return. Then, he addressed his phone, "Tattletale, how long is that thing going to stay up there?"

"Forever. It learned that the ground isn't safe."

"Where's Logy with the flashpod, then?"

"He threw one but the Rathalos barely noticed. This smoke is lessening the impact of it."

A modern explosive appeared in his hand. "A flashbang should take care of that."

"And risks wrecking all of you guys' vision. Drag it outside instead," she suggested.

He considered it. Flying monster in the open air, fighting with a cliff on one side? "Nah. Let me think—I got an idea." The flashbang vanished, replaced by a smoke grenade. Activating it, he tossed the explosive over a shoulder, severing line of sight with the Rathalos.

"Am I going to like this idea?"

"Heh. What a silly question."

Answer's obviously no.

Letting the Palico down, he raced out of the smoke. The Rathalos hadn't detected him yet, head swiveling in vain to peer through hazy darkness. Perfect.

What use was waiting, giving it free license to rain fire on them all? If he cannot make it come to him, then he just has to go to it.

A rocket-step propelled him high into the air. Belatedly, he noticed the weight on one of his legs and glanced down to find Escha had followed him, clinging to his knee. She waved a paw.

Grinning, he allowed her mischief, and aimed a hand at the Rathalos. The tattoo on the back of it shimmered. A shadowy limb burst forth. It slapped the Rathalos across the eyes as the monster turned in his direction, latching on and blinding it long enough for him to soar forward.

His boots stomped on the monster's snout, and he used the momentum to walk on, striding over the head before the Rathalos could react. Escha jumped off him to scamper ahead, racing along its back, while he landed to sit at the base of the neck, gripping the spiky scales as the Rathalos began to thrash about.

"Jaune, what the hell are you doing!?" Tattletale yelled, her voice shrill with panic.

"Yeehaw! Call me Cowboy Jaune from now on!"

"Idiot! Idiooot!"

Or that. Either would fit, really. Hahaha!

Seriously, what was in that drink Escha gave him? He wanted more.

The hovering flight of the Rathalos, already shaky, was thrown further off-balance by his presence. Drifting to one side, it beat its wings at a frantic pace to compensate, head twisting to try and bite Jaune's legs. An admirable stretch of the neck that must have strained its muscles to the utmost placed its mouth at an angle to blast a shallow wave of fire, forcing him to duck.

Once the attack ended, Jaune gave a firm shove that pushed him away from the Rathalos. Freed, it did not waste a second, flying clear. Or it tried, at least. Jaune threw [Third Arm] out to snag it by the lower back now, putting him again on the Rathalos to a truly hateful yowl from his ornery mount.

Fed up, the Rathalos banked hard to face the nearest cavern wall. Jaune gained a clearer idea of its plan as the monster accelerated on a direct course for the surface of the ancient, half-petrified wood. Twisting in the air, it aimed to take the collision on its back.

Yeah, no. Getting squished between the two wasn't his idea of a good time.

"Escha! To me!" The felyne scrambled onto him, and Jaune leapt high just before impact.

The tree hollow shook as the Rathalos crashed into the wall, hurting nothing but itself. Talons scrabbled on the wood, finding purchase and a moment for the Rathalos to recover, after which it launched off in flight once more.

If a wyvern could cry, this one might have. Jaune and Escha touched down on the limply-hanging tail, and grabbed tight. The Rathalos gave a violent shake to dislodge them, failing to its extreme frustration.

Jaune accepted a mallet from the Palico, pulled out of a pouch that almost made him suspect dimensional shenanigans with how much she can fit into it. (That, or good organizational skills, which still counted as magic to him in any case.)

Gripping with his legs, he wound back an arm, then swung down with his full strength to strike the chisel Escha had propped into the broken tail section. A sharp crack rang across the cavern, followed by an ear-splitting shriek. The Rathalos went berserk.

The monster veered, and rolled, and flipped in midair, accepting to wreck the muscles and bones of the maimed wing in the process just so that it may rid itself of the two unwanted passengers. Fire spewed every which way in the hope of clipping them.

[Third Arm] granted Jaune leverage to stay in place and raise the mallet. Escha wasn't needed anymore, the chisel lodged deep in the crevice formed between the bone. It drove an inch further as he smashed the chisel handle with another strong blow.

The keening wail did not sound like it came from a beast at the top of the food chain. No, in this moment, the Rathalos recognized the truth. It was prey.

A whimper followed the third blow. Defiance, after the fourth, with one last ditch effort to bash them against the tree. Resignation at the fifth, it cannot feel sensations in the tail any longer.

The sixth time that the hammer fell, it gave a cry of loss. The tail snapped, held together by flesh and skin that tore with every movement the monster made, dragged down by the sheer weight. Hot blood poured freely from the wound, no stemming or scabbing this time to alleviate the damage, worsened when Jaune carved into it with his sword.

Escha clambered over him as the tail at last severed from the Rathalos. The sudden absence of the weight, and with exhaustion taking hold after the rampage, led to the monster following after the lost limb in a crashing fall.

Jaune jumped from its back, carrying Escha, slowing his descent on each step with light activations of his boots until they landed nearby.

"Good job, you two!" Logy praised as he regrouped with them. "Come on, it's almost over!"

Almost? Shouldn't it be done?

The Rathalos disabused him of that delusion, slowly climbing to its feet. One wing laid crumpled against its body, damaged beyond use, and a thick line of blood trailed behind the monster. The leg broken by the Deviljho had the bones poking through the skin, but one would not think it mattered with how the Rathalos stomped forward.

"How hardy are these things?" Jaune cried, brandishing his weapons.

This time, the Rathalos abandoned flight. Forsook fire. It charged, relying on pure simple mass. If it could not defeat them by everything else, then it still had this.

The cavern shook with the force of its footfalls. It began slow, laborious, growing faster as it picked up momentum. In the end, a car, a truck, a damn train sped towards the party.

"Uhhh, Tattletale? Plan?"

"Run. Duh."

"Logy?"

"I agree. Run."

"Escha?"

"Are you kidding? Run!"

Jaune spun to the side as the party scattered, swiping his sword along the Rathalos in passing, cutting a shallow scratch.

The Rathalos ran on, crashing into the cavern wall. It had been ready for that, angling to take the impact on a shoulder. One leg kicked off the wall, the entire frame of the monster turning to face them. One stomp, two stomps, three stomps, it was gunning to run them over, as many times as it took. Jaune, especially.

"Alright, I've done this before." It's playing matador. He managed to do that against faster opponents. This was no problem.

The Rathalos made another unsuccessful pass. Jaune scored another meaningless attack.

"These guys are so annoying."

The incredible vitality of this world's monsters necessitated a strategy of striking a weakpoint over and over again, breaking one's way in. Strength, his strength rather, wasn't enough. Precision mattered. Perseverance mattered. Keeping the thing pinned so they could shank it in the soft parts mattered.

"Head or tail, Jaune. Anywhere else is too thick to pierce right now."

"If I could get it to stay still, sure."

On the third charge, he jumped straight up. The Rathalos, sensing a chance, reared its head after him.

A shade from getting eaten, Jaune triggered a rocket blast to flip past the monster. He landed right behind it and, spinning, shoved his sword into the tail stump. Accompanying the bestial shriek, blood spurted from the aggravated wound.

It fell far short of a killing blow. There's nothing important there. The monster would fall in time, but not now.

The Rathalos kept moving, yanking Jaune along until he managed to withdraw Crocea Mors. For a moment, it turned its head to look back at him, and he entertained the hope that he had angered it to the point of engaging him in a direct battle. But no, the monster was committed to its course. It reached the wall, and returned for a fourth pass.

Was it even thinking anymore? Or was it betting on him tiring out first?

Letting slip a sigh, Jaune once more got ready to dodge.

Logy threw a wrench in his plan, planting himself in front of the Rathalos with his shield raised high.

"Logy! What are you doing?" he yelled.

"Steady on," the Hunter said. "I've got a plan."

Jaune skipped to the side, then skipped back, torn between moving out of danger and staying to support his teammate. "And this plan is?" He stumbled as Logy tossed the gunlance to him, and he juggled it alongside his sword and shield, ultimately vanishing the latter pair so he could hold the lance with both hands.

The weapon looked like a mishmash of a giant revolver and a jousting lance. It would fit right in with Beacon if not for the animal skin and bone parts meshed among the metal.

"It's simple. I'll make the fella stay in place. You beat it to death."

"I have many questions."

"Ha! It's too late for that. Here we go!"

Finding its targets stationary at last, the Rathalos opened its jaw wide, and pushed itself to speed up.

Jaune rolled aside. He was the only one who did. Logy didn't move, not even at the last second. Teeth met shield, and the Hunter wedged the thing straight inside the mouth of the Rathalos, his feet carving two grooves as he was pushed backward.

The grooves deepened, then caught, digging no further. One would think that would result in Logy being squashed flat by the massive frame of the monster, yet he held firm, knees bending under the force but refusing to buckle.

"You're kidding me," Jaune said, not quite believing it.

The Rathalos was the one to lose momentum, grinding to a halt. It strove to overpower the Hunter, pressing down with all its weight.

Logy turned, and cheerily called over, "Your turn!"

Right. This wasn't the time to gawk.

"Head or tail, huh?" He cast his gaze between two choices.

He first thought to aim for an eye, or the open mouth. The furious push and pull between Logy and the Rathalos prevented a clear shot. The tail was a death of inches, an arduous bloodletting that would require who knew how long. Tattletale interrupted before he could decide.

"Wait, Jaune, what's that spot on its back?"

Jaune blinked, and flicked his eyes up.

There, near the base of the neck, was a spot devoid of scales, revealing the pink flesh beneath.

It was where Escha harvested the scales in their first encounter with the monster. Her light touch had left little trauma there, and so avoided activating the hardening process that would toughen the affected area.

"I think you've got a winner."

"Yeah. I do, too."

An easy rocket–step dropped him onto the monster's back. It noticed, and attempted to dislodge the shield so it could go after him. Logy put a stop to that by jamming the shield further, locking it between the sharp teeth.

Lifting the lance high, Jaune pointed the tip at the unprotected flesh, and stabbed downward as hard as he could. The bone of the Anjanath, honed to an edge, parted the flesh to slide a few inches deep, provoking a roar from the Rathalos.

Jaune furrowed his brow. The attack hadn't been all that impressive, and he was now considering the idea of swapping to Crocea Mors. The lack of the lance's weight meant he wouldn't achieve the same penetrating power, but the speed of his lighter sword—

"Pull the trigger!" Logy shouted from below.

Checking the handle of the gunlance, he located the item in question. It resembled one that would be found on a regular gun. Reversing his grip to hold the weapon the proper way, he obliged Logy's request.

Boom!

With just a light click, a gunlance shell slammed into the Rathalos, right next to the lance tip, striking flesh that had been softened by the first stab. The resulting explosion pushed the lance out.

The Rathalos bucked, nearly throwing Jaune off. Lassoing with [Third Arm] maintained his balance, and he drove the lance into the wound a second time, deeper now. Something clicked as the gun barrel pressed tight against the Rathalos.

Logy called up, "Hit the catch next to the trigger, and pull again! Fullburst!"

Boomboomboomboomboom!

This time, the trigger depressed flat against the handle, and a section of the gun barrel unlocked to unleash the remaining shells in one fell swoop, the explosions combining to blast the gunlance out of the wound. It flew past Jaune, and he strained to keep the lance in his grip while a vibration worked its way up the weapon, up his arm, and thrummed through his whole body. He was standing horizontal, almost, hanging on to the Rathalos like a rappelling mountaineer as it reared back.

Logy, dangling off his shield that was still inside the wyvern's mouth, smashed a flashpod directly into one of its eyes to overwhelm the senses of the Rathalos, blanking out its mind.

During that opening, Jaune stabbed the lance back in the wound, and Logy roared his next order.

"The catch on the other side! Wyrmstake cannon!"

A smaller tube extended, just below the long gun barrel. A sharpened spike rested at the tip, resembling a bayonet. It shot out in a drilling motion, spinning round and round to dig into the Rathalos before setting off in—BOOM!—yet another explosion, this one shattering the layer of bones weakened by the fullburst barrage.

The Rathalos slipped to the ground, on one knee, then the other.

"Brace the lance! Lever at the top!"

Searching for the best stance to do that, he adjusted his grip on the handle, tucking it under his arm. Finding the switch, he thumbed it.

From within the lance there came the sound of fluids racing from one end to the other. It had to be some kind of fuel, because an igniter near the tip of the gun barrel lit a flame. In a flash, Jaune experienced a vision of what would soon follow, and his heart fluttered in anticipation.

"Wyvernfire!"

The Anjanath, long dead, yet breathed again as a jet of flames shot out of the gunlance and straight into the Rathalos, powerful as anything it ever sent at Jaune. White-hot, the intense force was such that it launched the gunlance like a rocket in the opposite direction, taking Jaune with it. He flew in an arc, landing yards away from the Rathalos that was now cooking from the inside.

Lying on the ground, Jaune stared at the cavern ceiling and muttered to himself.

"Oh please, oh please… let me do that again."

Stubbornly, terrifyingly, the Rathalos hadn't died then and there. Crawling, it turned to level a baleful glare at him. Jaune sat up as the monster opened its mouth, seeing the last spark of fire flickering within.

"Yoooou... are entirely too much trouble."

Answering the challenge, Jaune summoned a loaded weapon to hand, grunting as the weight settled on one shoulder. He aimed it directly at the mouth of the Rathalos.

But then, the monster reached the limits of its strength. With a final roar, the Rathalos sank down, expiring where it lay.

He took his finger off the trigger. Suspicious eyes studied the monster for one last trick. Finding none, he relaxed and fell flat on his back.

"Alright, guys. Let's get that Deviljho."

Outside, a signal flare screeched into the sky, lighting up in fireworks to alert their colleagues of their successful hunt.


-o-​


A lone tree grew by the coast, and Jaune sat beneath its shade. Nowhere as big as the ancient tree at the center of the jungle, it was mighty in its own right with the trunk wider than he was tall, and perfect for him to rest against while enjoying the seabreeze blown in from the ocean at his back. Next to him lay a pile of assorted knick-knacks, objects from his Pocket he judged would be unnecessary during the next hour and thus removed to make space for things that were. On his other side, Tattletale huffed and puffed, wiped out by the return trek down from the Rathalos nest.

"Have you ever seen anything like it?"

He was referring to the stampede before them, with creatures big and small rushing out of the jungle in a chaotic scramble. Dinosaurs lumbered in packs that split in halves to run along the coast. Monkey-like lizards scampered underfoot, or clung to larger beasts. Above, colorful tropical birds flew in one great flock.

"Nope…" the tired girl replied in a soft voice. Her eyes were shut, head tilted back. "Means that… it's close…"

He could have figured that out for himself. Unless there was a third big monster hanging around the area, it had to be the Deviljho responsible for the mass exodus. Linca and Reyfer were supposed to lead it here to the rendezvous point.

The first faces he recognized weren't them, though. Logy, accompanied by Escha, exited the jungle from a different direction, making a beeline for them. Escha went ahead, zipping across the ground to climb onto Tattletale's lap, where she offered the girl a jar of golden liquid with both hands.

A small smile tugged at Tattletale's lips, and she accepted the jar with a muttered thanks. As she sipped at the energy medicine, her hand rose to brush through the soft fur of the felyne, eliciting a contented purr; Escha wasn't shy about it, pressing her head into the hand.

Somewhat rejuvenated, Tattletale greeted Logy as he neared, "Got what you needed?"

Logy nodded. "The treetop camp still had a supply of sleep herbs. Took a bit to find the parashrooms, but I fashioned a couple of tranq bombs out of them." He showed them two pink orbs composed of what looked like wadded-up clay. "These will harden in a few minutes, then one good throw can crack them open."

"So that's what they look like… You sure this is enough for a monster?" Jaune asked.

"Two tends to be the amount that affects most species. Any more and it could mess them up when they inhale the fumes, which is a problem if it's a monster we decide to relocate instead of slay."

Tattletale held her chin, studying the bombs. "Things can't be that simple, or the monster hunting gig would end pretty quick. The toxin in those bombs isn't that strong, is it? And really only works when the target is somewhat worn down."

"Exactly," Logy said. "Toss these at the Deviljho now and it wouldn't do a thing. If it's already half-unconscious? Knocks the fella right out for our retrieval crews to move."

That still sounded dead useful to Jaune. A method to shorten battles, to retreat from danger, or, say, to put a dragon in a position for him to strike a decisive blow? Color him intrigued.

"This could have been useful when we fought the Rathalos," he remarked.

Logy pulled a face. "No way, nuh-uh. Guild regulations are clear on that, and I agree with them. Overuse of these when they were first invented bit us in the butt. They're best for the ones we want to capture and nothing else. If we're slaying a monster, we do it right. They have the same reasons to live as we do."

"The responsible slaying of monsters, huh?" Jaune said, musing on the concept. On Remnant, that involved massive firepower, the bigger the better, until the Grimm population of an area hit zero. Although, he had to admit that this universe didn't face the same sort of foes. Monsters here weren't evil, from what he had seen. Vicious, pissed off, and gluttonous, but not evil. And so, for all the tricks and traps that Hunters employed, they gave the monsters a chance to fight for their lives.

Jaune wasn't as sure about that last part, because seeing the trees collapsing in the distance was hitting every alarm button. His instincts screamed at him to either run, or kill whatever was the cause of that.

He jumped to his feet, and recapped, "Step one: Tire it out. Step two: put it to sleep. Got it."

"Shouldn't be too hard," Tattletale chirped, peppier now with the super-coffee she just drank. Brushing off her outfit, she got up and moved to the stretch of sand set further down the coastline, where she had planted the camouflage cloak. Ducking to the other side of it, she vanished in a blink, with her next words coming from his phone. "Good luck, Jaune."

"Easy-peasy," he said, psyching himself up.

His preparations were simpler. They didn't want the Deviljho near the tree, and the knot of vines strung on the branches, just yet. It was a contingency to keep in the back pocket. The area in front of it featured mostly flat ground, with a few outcroppings. That would be their battlefield, and he advanced into the center of the space. The others joined him there, and not a moment too soon.

Their missing members sprinted into the open, arms and legs pumping.

A distance behind them, the Deviljho barreled out of the dense foliage in all its green T-Rex glory. With spittle flying and each step leaving a groove in the dirt, it mounted a charge that none dared stop.

The Hunters have left their mark on it, however. The Deviljho breathed in heavy gasps as it ran, stomach starved of food and growling, with some of the exterior teeth broken, presumably due to Linca smacking it with her hammer. The scorch marks, mud splatters, and unrepentant grins on the two Hunters' faces spoke of a wild time fending off their target. Neither carried worse than superficial wounds, and seemed in fighting shape.

"We dropped a dang cliff on it!" Reyfer boasted upon reaching them.

Logy raised a thumb. "Nice!"

Yet despite that, Devijho survived. Jaune once again marveled at monster physiology. Frankly, this one might be beyond them. Good thing they didn't have to kill it.

And if it could survive a rockslide…

The Hunters drew their weapons, and they along with Jaune fanned out in a loose half-circle, dividing the monster's attention. The tactic was doubly effective on the ever-ravenous Deviljho, now rocked by indecision on which prey to eat first. It'd get to them all, of course, that was never a doubt in its mind, but the choice of appetizer could set the tone for the whole meal.

Lucky Boy Jaune received that honor. He would have liked to attribute that to a magnetic charisma or dashing good looks, except he had the sneaking suspicion it was more because he dressed in a flashy white and red poncho, the colors blaring his presence.

The Deviljho unhinged its jaw, the mouth opening impossibly wide, head lowering until its chin scraped the ground at the perfect height to scoop him in.

"Might want to move there, just saying."

"Yeah, yeah, I will." He summoned a long metal tube, propping it on a shoulder. It was what he would have used on the Rathalos, but never got the chance. "After this. Bets on it surviving a rocket launcher?"

The responsible slaying of monsters called for the most super ethical of weapons.

"...Where are you putting the shot?" Tattletale was game.

Taking a knee, he aimed the rocket launcher. At this distance, and with how big the monster was, he couldn't miss. And there was only one target he could go for, as it blocked the bulk of the Deviljho from sight.

Observing from her hiding place, Tattletale figured out his intentions. "Ah. Dead as a sandwich, then. Bet."

Jaune pulled the trigger. A line of smoke trailed the rocket as it shot straight down the gullet of Deviljho.

The monster jerked its head, swallowing on instinct.

BOOM!

The explosion rocked the Deviljho, sending it stumbling. Its belly distended with the force of the blast, bulging in an almost cartoon fashion. A slip, and the monster struck the ground with a slam that raised tremors below their feet. It laid on its side, twitching, with a column of roiling smoke rising from the open mouth.

In that moment, Jaune became the envy of all the Hunters as they stared at the rocket launcher.

"Sooo, did I win the bet—I didn't!? It's still alive! Holy crap!" Tattletale gasped in realization. "They're a species that eats everything, even trees and dirt. To digest that… The stomach is probably the toughest organ in a Deviljho!"

"Pretty much what I thought," Jaune said. "The thing shrugged off a rockslide."

She scoffed. "There's no way you predicted it would live through this."

He didn't. In truth, he was also hoping with all his might that it dies when he pulled the trigger, capture be damned. Because if it lived, then it was going to be pissed. At him.

The Deviljho rolled onto its stomach. Scarlet eyes locked on Jaune, and the monster growled through its teeth.

A change came over the Deviljho as it laid there. The smoke pouring from its mouth took on a new consistency, thicker and scattering ominous sparks. With a tearing sound, the scaly hide on the back and shoulders of the monster split apart in long seams, the muscles beneath swelling to bulge through the gaps. The exposed flesh pulsed with a red glow, slowly spreading to the head of the monster—at which point Jaune recognized what was happening.

The Deviljho had gotten really, really angry. And that gave it a power-up.

"I might have made a mistake."

Logy laughed good-naturedly. "Don't say that! You did great! Fella may act tough, but that did hurt it badly. See how it's trembling?"

"That's not rage?" Hope sprang in his chest.

Then the other man killed it.

"It's not all rage. There's damage being done inside, where we can't see." Logy pointed with his lance. "So, new plan, everybody. No need to defend yourselves, there's nothing on Deviljho's mind except Jaune. Just focus on attacking."

"And what about me?" Jaune whimpered asked in a calm and collected manner, very much holding out doubts on this strategy.

"You, my friend, will be putting your strange abilities to use, and—"

"Run, Jaune, run!"

"What she said."

Jaune looked at the monster bracing one leg under itself, then the other, before pushing off the ground. The whole time, its gaze refused to stray from him. The red glow had reached the eyes, and the monster growled hoarsely through a scorched throat.

"Oh, joy."

The growl ramped up into a roar, screamed to the sky, as the Deviljho broke into a new charge. Long strides carried it on top of them in a matter of seconds. The head reared, jaw spread wide to let Jaune count the rows and rows of sharp fangs.

"My, what big—"

The head slammed down, crushing the spot he just vacated. Rock and dirt flew high in a spray, some hitting Jaune as he floated in the air.

He tried to calm his breathing, a hand over his thundering heart. "Fast, aren't you?"

A red eye flicked in his direction.

Jaune cleared another hundred yards at a sickening speed, because oh wow can that thing stretch! The monster was standing vertical on tip-toes, the massive jaw clamped shut way past Jaune's previous position, which would be somewhere around the height of the stomach now. Legs tucked into his chest, he looked down, gulping in apprehension at how close that had been.

Then, he put out a hand and summoned the boulder in his Pocket. The size of a person, and many times denser, it immediately dropped, bashing the Deviljho right on the nose to make it go cross-eyed.

His other hand took a picture with his scroll.

Heh. Throwing out most of his stuff to free up room was so worth it.

"Jaune, twenty seconds," Tattletale warned.

Already? Time really flies on rocket boots. Shutting off the power, he fell after the Deviljho. Near the ground, he began rocket-stepping to slow down, angling to land beside his rock while the Deviljho was still shaking off the hit to the face. A tap and it returned to his Pocket, primed for a second run should the opportunity arise.

Meeting the eyes of the Hunters hard at work chipping away at the ankles, he saluted them before escaping ahead of the monster. They went ignored by the Deviljho as it pursued him with single-minded focus, especially since they stayed in place rather than joining the chase.

Logy, in particular, had turned toward the beach and was signaling at Tattletale. A few moments after that, her voice spoke to Jaune from the phone, relaying what the Hunter said.

"Circle around, and come back to them. Do your best to stay low to the ground so their attacks can reach the head. Stunning the monster will make it easier for the tranq bombs to take effect." She continued the explanation as he followed the instruction and banked to the left. "Basically, we want to scramble those brain signals hard before adding the toxin to the mix."

"You make it sound so simple," he said, half-jesting.

The other half was pure adrenaline giving him a case of motor-mouth, because his route allowed the monster to cut on an angle to intercept him, which it did, and he was coming into range. He watched the teeth.

He should have watched the tail.

The shape of the Deviljho lent it an impression that was easy to underestimate. Long, fat, and green…honestly, it looked like a pickle. One would think it clumsy, and lazy. The way it pivoted on the balls of its feet was anything but, resembling the graceful movement of a dance more than anything.

A dancing pickle.

The tail whipped through the air, a solid block covering the height of a double-decker bus at its thickest, and almost as tall as Jaune at the thinnest.

Launching [Third Arm] to pull him, Jaune ducked low in a slide. Not low enough. The tail cracked him on the chin.

Momentum continued to carry him forward. He hit the ground, bounced, hit it again, bounced again. Unable to tell up from down, his attempt at recovery via rockets scraped his face on the earth for a good length, eating dirt the whole way.

Salvation came in the form of abs with him smacking face-first into Linca, who had missed the catch. Rock hard, they were still softer than the monster bones she wore as armor, so he was quite grateful for that.

"Owwww…" he said in thanks.

It was the best he could manage at the moment.

"You did good, Jaune!" Logy praised, slapping him on the back with the others quick to pile on. "You did good!"

"Owwww…" ("Glad to hear it!")

An energy shot from Escha got him standing in time to meet the Deviljho. He waved for the Hunters to split to either side, leaving him alone in the lane. Shadowy wisps wrapped around his hand, and he tapped his heels impatiently, stamping light scorch marks below.

He was beginning to get a grasp on the monster. The speed it can bring to bear meant he shouldn't move early, lest it adjust for the maneuver. Put a lot of distance between them, also a mistake. For the Deviljho, its size was a weapon, and the sweeping blow reflected that. Leave space, and it filled the space.

Evade, but keep within a tight area. That was the key.

The chin of the monster hit the ground, driving a wide groove as the mouth stretched wide.

[Third Arm] extended out. Not to the full extent it could be. Not even half. A long hop's length. A tug, and he turned on his heels to watch the Deviljho brush past, smiling as he listened to the sound of explosive shells and Linca's hammer cracking the monster on the chin—revenge by proxy, he considered it. A step back avoided the wider bulk of the body.

The monster dug its talons down to bleed away the momentum, swinging around. To help it locate him, Jaune brought out one of the few firearms he kept on him—there weren't many that still had bullets—and popped off a couple of rounds, the loud noise attracting its attention.

It didn't rush this time, needing two strides to close the distance. The head reared, a familiar tell. Jaune backstepped as the ground exploded before him, one hand raised over his eyes to ward off the spray of debris, then skipped behind Linca to give her room to slap her hammer on the chin again.

Reyfer got his own licks in, eliminating an eye with his bowgun projectiles to elicit a screech. The Deviljho almost lost interest in Jaune at that point, averted with him peppering the other eye with gunfire. The threat of total blindness refocused it real quick, and Jaune had to dodge another chin slam.

A number of exterior teeth were knocked loose with that attack. Jaune wondered if the monster realized.

Linca broke a couple more, and Jaune sticking around to bait the Deviljho soon made him her favorite person in the world as she went to town with her hammer. The massive chin became pockmarked with craters under her hand, faults forming through repeated strikes.

A cheer went up among the party as they witnessed the first of those faults shattering to reveal a softer meat beneath the hard outer carapace.

By this point, the Deviljho hated all of them, not just Jaune. With multiple annoyances scurrying underfoot, it chose to attack every single one at once. Corded muscles flexed as the monster squatted, then leapt upward.

"Scatter!" Jaune and Logy both shouted.

Reyfer was already safely outside range. A sprinting Logy scooped Escha into his arms in passing. Linca dove clear.

Jaune slipped below the now falling Deviljho, dropped his rock there, and blasted his rockets at full power to escape the area.

The Deviljho came down, and one foot landed right on the boulder. Its weight drove the rock into the ground, but not before the monster slipped on the unexpected impediment. Instead of two feet, the entire frame of the Deviljho landed on its side, kicking up an earthquake that had everyone stumbling.

When they regained their footing, it was still lying down. Identical grins grew on their faces.

Jaune pointed at the monster. "Charge!"

The Hunters gladly obliged, rushing in from every direction to unleash their most devastating attacks. To Jaune's eternal jealousy, Logy got the chance to pull off the full breadth of gunlance functions, drilling into the broken gap. A massive bowgun bolt struck the same spot, exploding to widen the wound, helping to prepare it for the third Hunter of the party.

Linca, caught on the opposite end of the monster, ran up an incline with her hammer wound back. Taking a jump, she threw the heavy weapon forward, and followed the momentum to spin round and round in a tight revolution that repeatedly smashed the hammer all along the length of the Deviljho, carrying her ever closer to her target.

From the phone, Jaune heard Tattletale groaning through a headache. She's an odd girl, smart yet sometimes confused by the simplest of concepts.

The final hammer blow slapped the Deviljho in the cratered chin, and with a sudden jerk, the monster relaxed in a boneless stupor.

Red, glowing muscles faded in color, shrinking to fit within the skin.

They had stunned it.

Reyfer called over, "Logy, toss the—"

"Way ahead of you!" The pellets were already in his hand, and the Hunter pitched them at the Deviljho, They shattered against the snout, releasing puffs of pink smoke that the monster inhaled in one breath.

Nobody moved, or made a sound. Six sets of eyes stared hard at the monster, waiting for a reaction.

Just as they began to let their guards down…

It twitched.

"Uh-oh," Logy said, utterly failing to convey the trouble they were in.

With laborious effort, the Deviljho rolled to its feet. It swayed like a drunken sailor, but remained upright. The working eye rolled in their socket, bleary and lost, taking a long time to find the party. Though once it did, it never left them for a second. A rumbling growl rose from its throat, matching the one in the stomach. Hate did not spur it on this time. It was ravenous.

"You didn't exhaust it enough," Tattletale explained, rather unnecessarily.

"Yeah, I think we got that," Jaune said. "What now?"

Logy answered, "Heh heh. That's why we have backup plans. Lead it to the tree!"

They retreated in a disorganized mob, sure in the knowledge that their foe would pursue the snacks on legs that it saw them as. There was little grace in the mighty footfalls now, the Deviljho too groggy to stay on a straight course.

Reaching the tree, they ran beneath the outstretched branches, guiding the monster so that it would travel through the same spot. Jaune rocket-stepped to draw level with the foliage, among the criss-crossing network of vines. Many had been cut free beforehand, with just the two key tree branches that Tattletale identified left intact to support the arrangement.

As the Deviljho passed under him, he swung his sword to sever these last connections. The cords of thick, hardy vines fell onto the Deviljho, and in the subsequent struggle tangled hopelessly around it. Once more, it crashed to the ground.

"Good!" Logy said as Jaune landed beside the Hunters. "Alright, everyone." He cast his gaze across the party, meeting their eyes one by one. "This is it. The finish. Either we exhaust it, and the tranq bomb toxins take effect, or we slay the Deviljho for good. Whichever course it shall be, none could deny that this was our greatest hunt to date!"

Linca, Reyfer, Escha, and Jaune raised their weapons to the sky, and roared their approval.

"Now, let's get that Deviljho!"

No sooner as he said it, a tranquilizer dart flashed by the group, zipping straight into the monster's nostril, causing it to sneeze a glob of mucus. A second dart joined the first. Then another. All were shot with unerring accuracy despite the target twisting and turning in a wrestling bout with the vines.

By themselves, they would do little to a creature of that size. Combined with the toxin already wrecking havoc inside, the flagging strength, and the many blows to the face… they did just enough to push the monster over the edge of unconsciousness.

The red eye blinked. It blinked again, slower. The third time the eyelid fell shut, it did not open.

Slowly, the head lowered to rest on a layer of vines. The Deviljho ceased to struggle.

Snores soon arose.

The people standing over the sleeping monster turned their heads in the same direction. Their gazes landed on a stretch of sand along the coast, where a girl posed with hips cocked and a crossbow held aloft. Smiling sweetly, she greeted them with a wave, wiggling her fingers.

Tattletale stole their kill!


-o-​


The wooden gates opened, allowing passage to the procession.

First through were the lumbering dinosaurs used as beasts of burden, dragging behind them a cart the length of a cargo truck. The Rathalos rested upon the cart, and sunlight cast a rippling shimmer on the red scales to draw the eye.

A second cart trailed the first, and if the last one attracted attention, then this one commanded it. A monster never seen in the New World. A species thought to exist only across the sea. Known as "World Eaters' for their all-devouring hunger, a Deviljho crossed the gates. Alive.

Among the onlookers, a researcher dropped the stacks of thesis papers in her arms, and salivated. A gluttonous Hunter looked at the puny bird drumstick he was eating, then at the legs of the Deviljho, and did the same.

After them came the heroes of the hour. Monster Hunters, and two strangers. A rousing cheer greeted their arrival, and that was how Jaune got his first look at Astera.

More outpost than settlement, Astera was built for function. Built as shelter and defense in one. Beyond all that, it was built—

"Are those ships?"

Logy laughed, and turned around to spread his arms wide.

"Welcome, you two, to Astera! Where ships are houses!"

He hadn't been kidding. The people of Astera ascribed to the idea that anything can serve a second purpose. The multi-level outpost stretched its way up a waterfall, and comprised dozens of ships recycled after completing their voyage to these lands. Hulls and sails formed freestanding roofs to provide shade for the port, in one case with an entire clipper turned upside-down to be raised aloft by ship masts. The floors were made of deck planks, as were the bridges crisscrossing the inlet. Ships rammed into rocks became buildings, move-in ready, stacking one on top of another to create a residential district.

Above the settlement, resting on separate rock spires, there balanced two halves of a ship prevented from collapsing solely by the support beams connecting them.

Tattletale shook her head at the haphazard construction. "It's a madhouse…"

So she judged. That wasn't the impression that Jaune received as he followed Logy and the others through the shipyard, turning every which way to take in the sights. The individual parts may seem messy and chaotic, the many voices and meows merging in a rowdy din, but everyone moved with purpose, whether human or felyne. Running, in cases. Always off to somewhere, a destination on their mind. A thousand different stories, tied to one unified goal.

And that was the Guild. The Research Commision of the New World.

Here, the city never slept. Never stopped advancing.

Reyfer the gunner soon split off from the party to go report their findings, heading to a corner of the outpost where a grizzled old man that looked like he bench-pressed people for fun stood at the head of a table strewn with maps and notes. That old man met Jaune's gaze across the distance, before glancing to Tattletale, keen eyes scrutinizing what did not belong amidst the tableau that was Astera. He then broke into laughter, giving the pair an approving nod.

Jaune got the feeling that this was a man who would very much enjoy hearing about the impending Rath species influx.

Directed onto a platform lift, he marveled at the water-wheel pulley system that carried them to one of the overhead bridges. There was a rough simplicity to it that hid the ingenuity of the Astera locals.

As they stepped off it, Linca bade leave, adjusting the sack of modern firearms on her shoulder while pointing toward the entrance to a nearby building. An orange glow, and heat, emanated from the open doors.

"I will go put in the equipment orders now. That way, they can rush it for when you leave tomorrow." The Hunters had voiced their full confidence that the guns—especially the rocket launcher—and remaining bullets Jaune was leaving behind for them would be more than sufficiently interesting to the smiths to wrangle them that favor. "Final call, you are definitely fine with the shares?"

Jaune nodded. "We can't stick around for the days it would take for the Deviljho to be studied, so it only makes sense you get the parts from it. And I should ask you the same question. The Rathalos—"

"Is one of the many to come," she finished for him, with Logy and Escha humming in agreement. "We will soon be up to our ears in Rathalos gear. The Deviljho is… rare. Very rare. The bones would make for a wonderful hammer." The hammer enthusiast pumped her fists in anticipation.

Faced with her eagerness, he could only chuckle. "Fair enough."

Both sides were getting the best of it, so what was there to complain about?

Well…

After Linca left, Jaune turned to Logy. "I still think it's best we leave now. That portal gets finicky once our reason to be in a world is over."

Logy would have none of it.

"You earned those monster parts, and you earned your rest for the day. That's what a hunt is. If your portal is so smart like you said then it'd know that."

Tattletale facepalmed. "And I told you that's not how it works! A sophisticated program doesn't equate sentience, or understanding!"

The mad shrugged his shoulders. "The portal is in the mosswine grove, right? The retrieval squads are spreading the news around now. Our people going into the forest tonight will check on it. If oddities spring up like you warn us, we'll tell you right away. Otherwise, why worry?"

It wasn't the first time they had this argument, or the fifth. The Hunters had insisted on celebrating. Once they learned that the portal in Dunwall took time to spread, and had started to revert the moment the two of them left that universe, no dire warnings would persuade them from this course.

"Just…" Jaune gave up. "Just don't touch it."

"We're a careful lot, didn't ya know? Now, come on! You need to experience a real meal!"

That was another point of contention between them. The locals had been aghast upon hearing what Jaune considered a proper-sized dinner, let alone Tattletale and her tiny portions. Linca even cried tears of sympathy for the pair.

Jaune would be lying if he said he wasn't tempted. Forget dino nuggies, he could eat dragon meat!

Or, well, wyvern. Whatever. Those counted. If anyone has a problem with it, they can make their objections known, like with his title (proven twice more on this most glorious day!) of dragonslayer.

Heading in the opposite direction of the forge, they arrived at the bustling canteen. Set on an overlook, it allowed a stellar view of the outpost and surrounding lands. That wasn't what caught Jaune's eye.

Cats.

Felyne chefs cooked food in cat-shaped rock ovens carved from the cliff decorated with cat art. One among the chefs stood out, and not for the deference that the others gave him. The brawny felyne had muscles on his muscles, bulging beneath the fur.

He took one look at Jaune and Tattletale, and balked.

"Who starved these children!?"

Logy waved his arms in denial. "Nobody did!"

"You lie," the felyne hissed. Slamming his oversized knife on a cutting board, he pointed at Jaune. "He's scrawny." The word carried the sort of horror-struck grief that one used with phrases like 'It's too late for him' and 'what monster would do this.'

Quietly, Jaune flexed his arm, poking at a bicep to check his physique. He wasn't scrawny… was he?

Tattletale gave him an odd look.

"And he wouldn't be, if you fed him, Meowscular Chef," Logy countered. "That's why we're here after our hunt, so that they can bulk up like you're always saying." He leaned over the stone counter, lowering his voice. "Get this. They've never eaten wyvern."

Meowscular Chef (and that has to be a nickname, right?) gasped.

"That girl thinks tomatoes are 'kind of gross.'"

Meowscular Chef fainted into the arms of his assistants.

"Oh, and they said two chicken eggs is enough protein for the day."

That was the final straw. Even the other felynes in the kitchen looked offended. They roared (meowed) a warcry alongside Meowscular Chef, who began shouting orders to his subordinates, screaming about how Jaune and Tattletale were in desperate need of 'gains.'

Logy smiled evilly as he led them to a free table, nabbing two extra seats for their absent members in the process. "My friends, we are eating good tonight! After hearing that, I doubt Meowscular Chef is gonna let any of us leave before the fifth course."

"...Tell me you're joking," replied Tattletale. There's a slight quaver to her voice to suggest she might already know the answer.

Escha, climbing into the seat next to her, lightly patted the girl on the arm and shook her head.

Tattletale paled, while Jaune pounded a fist on the table's stone surface, signaling his acceptance of the challenge.

The open-air canteen was giving him a front row seat to the chefs at work, and his stomach growled at the scene. Slabs of meat heavier than him were being sliced into inches-thick strips, or tenderized into patties. Fire blazed in the rock ovens, and the hearty aroma of grilling fish wafted over the air. Golden grains of fried rice danced merrily in a giant wok.

In no time at all, a feast laid before the party, one that Jaune doubted they could finish, and that's counting Reyfer and Linca who had rejoined them at the table. Then he saw the chefs start on the second course.

Oh, boy.

His first taste of dragon meat, Jaune fell in love. The steak measured thick as his arm, yet was so tender after cooking that it tore with the lightest of bites. It didn't taste like any animal he had ever eaten, boasting a natural spicy tang that paired well with the flagon of honey mead they gave him. Veggies made their way into every dish, so crisp and fresh were they that he could imagine his body swelling with energy for each stalk of carrot or lettuce leaf consumed.

…Exactly like that, in fact. Eating the food didn't weigh on his stomach, didn't bloat him. Rather, it made him feel like he could run a marathon real quick before returning to continue the meal. The flavors seemed to almost sharpen the more he ate, the vividness of the ingredients striking differently on his tongue than minutes earlier.

Tattletale stared as he blazed through the dishes to advance to the second course. When she managed to push herself to the second course, he was on the third. She, and Escha, threw in the towel there. He went for fourths.

The Hunters were on their sixth. Yeah, even he had to take a step back and say 'enough' there.

It was around that point, sitting there snacking on morsels, chatting to the Hunters while listening with half an ear to Escha pestering Tattletale for stories of other worlds, that the thought struck him.

Today was his first true hunt.

No life-threatening ambush that forced him to fight. No complicated mess that he had to untangle. He found news of a monster causing trouble, and gathered a team to chase after it. Bringing it down, he got paid. After a hard day's work, the world became a little safer because of him. It was the life he signed up for.

But what he remembered, what he treasured were the unhurried, lighthearted times. The stroll through the woods, learning of the local fauna and flora. Chatting with Logy and Escha as they climbed a tree that was more akin to a mountain. Taking in the views.

It clashed with the lessons taught at Beacon. There, they pushed the value of speed and expediency, the need to focus on the battle before all else. In time, he would have learned to shut down his thoughts, good or ill, until a Grimm was dead. Nothing mattered but that a Huntsman completed his hunt without delay. The people of Remnant depended on it, each and every day.

Living was for when the job was done.

Here, always, the Hunters lived. Even as they hunted, they lived.

He envied them. Envied that the world did not wish for them to die. That, for all that they struggled, they could exist in harmony with nature. That they laughed because they wanted to, not because they had to. It seemed to him a fairer world.

Perhaps that was why he had let these guys convince him to stay the night.

Pushing a smile to his face, he snatched up a dino drumstick, and took a great big bite of it as he rejoined the revelry, joking with the Hunters and recounting to them tales of his adventures.

Tomorrow was another day. In this moment, as the sun set over Astera, Jaune chose to fool himself for a little while longer.

And dreamt that this was the life he was meant to live.


-o-​


The next morning, Jaune walked out of the forge, having donned his latest set of equipment.

Coming to a stop in front of Tattletale, he spun in place to let her see it from all angles, before spreading his arms. "So? How's it look?"

Tattletale leaned closer, chin in hand, to scan him up and down for a good long while. Afterwards, she rendered her judgement.

"Very samurai. Very…" Her eyes darted to the side, and she waffled for a bit before looking back at him. "Very Japan," she decided.

Jaune beamed. "You like it, then?"

The smile faded somewhat when she refused to answer that question.

Well, he loved it, and that's what mattered. Blended of Rathalos scales and metal plates lined with the wing membrane, wearing it reduced the roiling heat of the forge to a warm breeze for all of him except the exposed face. He was also quite pleased with how the tests of the defensive properties turned out. A heavy sword blow deflected off his arm with barely a scratch to his Aura, whereas before a bigger chunk would have been lost.

Nobody could say the armor set was subtle, of course. The red and black scales rippled in the light, covering him from head to toe—no footwear, as he requested, but the smiths crafted an outer layer that could be attached to his rocket boots. Sharp spikes were placed in strategic places to enable unarmed strikes. A half-visor hid his eyes. Overall, it combined to lend an aggressive image. This armor was forged for battle, not games.

And not for strolling down a modern city street. People in Vale understood a Huntsman's need for a few bits of armor, sure. A few. Manufactured from normal materials. With a giant lizard making up the majority of the outfit, they would be giving him side-eyes the whole time.

"This would probably have to be kept in the Pocket, huh?"

Tattletale nodded. "I'd recommend it. Staying under the radar has worked in our favor so far. Is it hard to put on?"

"Not at all," Jaune denied. "If I hurry, two minutes tops? The armorsmiths added a bunch of little ways they showed me to help speed things up."

"Two minutes? That's pretty good. Unless it's a threat coming out of left field, you can wear regular clothes to blend in and change over when you think you'd need to fight…" Trailing off, she studied him again. "Hey, can you…"

"What?"

"Let's say the armor is in your Pocket. Can you pull it out and have it appear on your body? Instead of in your hand?"

Jaune went to answer, paused, and thought it over.

"I don't know?" was his conclusion. "I've never tried." From the beginning, using his hand just seemed more intuitive.

"Do, then. It could turn two minutes into two seconds," she advised, a pleased smile growing as he nodded. "Now, where's your shiny new whacking stick? I want to see!" Snickering, she made a show of peeking here and there, knowing damn well where it was.

They appeared from thin air. Taking her advice to heart, he had visualized the shield coming to hand with the strap around his forearm, and the result suggested Tattletale may have struck on an interesting idea that very much warranted further exploration.

Similar to Crocea Mors, it was what's referred to as a heater shield, leading Jaune to wonder if perhaps its maker had a sense of humor. A sense of irony, too, seeing as it incorporated parts from the back of the Rathalos, specifically the section just behind the spot he pulverized. Scales colored in red and black traced the shape of the spine, the raised ridge serving to deflect blows to either side.

A heat-resistant heater shield, protecting with materials that couldn't protect its last owner.

It tanked a barrage of explosive shells earlier, though, so he won't complain. The smiths knew their craft.

In his other hand, he held what Tattletale mockingly called his 'whacking stick,' and he hated how apt a term it was. The gunlance was, in essence, exactly that. A big stick that he can deploy in situations where a small stick won't cut it.

He had inquired about an upgrade to Crocea Mors at first. The blacksmith had taken one look at the blade and bopped him on the head with a pair of tongs for asking silly questions. It wasn't possible to smelt metal and Rathalos bone together in a continuous whole. A sword of monster parts would constitute an entirely different sword than Crocea Mors. In the end, a thin strip of Rathalos scales, shaved from the outermost surface layer, wrapped around the handle for a better grip, and that was the furthest extent of changes there.

New fabrication was a simpler matter. Reflecting a sort of Hunter philosophy, the bulk of the lance came from the tail he cut; his achievement, now finding purpose as his weapon. Thicker and shorter than a jousting lance, the part above the handle was divided into two sections.

A lower gun cylinder half, reinforced with the Rathalos materials—cinched with metal supports—to handle the exhaust heat arising from the various incendiary functions contained within, from the explosive shells, to the wyrmstake cannon, to the wyvernfire.

A less complicated and primarily-metal upper half, serving both as a blunt instrument and a casing for the gun barrel, which was hidden under the sole monster part put into it, a lance tip shaped from the main tail spike that blended in with the dark metal.

The weight and balance would take getting used to. Still, it can swing hard, stab well, and go boom. What's not to like?


Red Rook
Universe: Monster Hunter
A lance. It's also a gun.
Long, thick, and hard. With this in hand, one may roar with the might of Rathalos.
Disclaimer: Not intended for use with one's Flame Atronachs.



"Wowee, look who's a proper Hunter now!" called a voice.

Jaune and Tattletale turned to see three monster Hunters stepping off the platform lift near the forge. Logy was the first to reach them, and he observed Jaune's Rathalos gear with approval, the gunlance in particular.

"Metal tip? Nice. I prefer bone, myself, but the Anjanath is better for that. Theirs are denser."

With the expert present, Jaune fell into discussion with the man on the intricacies of the weapon, comparing gunlances.

The gunlance was more finicky than, for example, a hammer. It required taking apart from time to time for maintenance, the way a gun would. Combat-wise, the gunlance and shield combo shared certain principles at the base level with his current sword and shield style, but the disparity in sizes meant he would need to accommodate fighting at a different speed, along with a host of other changes. Logy had a hundred such tips to impart, and Jaune eagerly memorized them.

Soon, though, he had to ask. "Soooo… what's with the barrel?"

Set between Reyfer and Linca, who had carried it all the way up here, it was bursting with plants, fruits, cured meats, potion jars, bug cages, ammunition shells, and various odds and ends.

Logy skipped back next to his teammates, and the trio flourished their hands at the barrel.

"It's our gift for you two!"

"Ain't we awesome?"

"I included my personal stock of Dodogama jerky. It is delicious."

Tattletale narrowed her eyes at the theatrics.

"They're hiding something."

Logy clasped a hand over his heart, wounded. "What? How silly!"

"Wait wait wait," Jaune interrupted, pointing at the barrel. "Where did you get these from?"

"Bought'em, obviously," Reyfer answered. "We weren't about to scrounge them up all in a morning, but the quartermaster stores are always a sure bet for picking things up on short notice."

"Felyne fur…" Tattletale muttered.

Logy said quickly. "Escha helped with it."

Whatever mystery Tattletale was stuck on this time, Jaune didn't know. He was more concerned with the fact that these three spent their money on so much stuff. It couldn't have been cheap.

"I can't take this. I mean, it's necessary supplies that you can use for yourself!"

"That so? You want to give it back?" said Logy. "And what if we say we'll throw it in the harbor first thing? That sounds like a fun idea, don't you think, Linca?"

Linca nodded with a dead serious expression.

"I…" Jaune paused, searching their eyes. He sighed. "Seriously, guys?"

"Just accept it, Jaune. We thought this over already." A slight smile flashed across Logy's face. "This is a decision everyone agreed would be good."

Reyfer turned to Logy. "I don't know, on second gander, his weak noodly arms might not be able to lift the barrel. Maybe we should get 'im a cart."

Jaune snorted at the joke. Wiping the beginning of a teardrop from his eyes, he affected a playful tone. "Yeah? Did you forget about my magic trick, Reyfer?" He placed a hand on the barrel.

And as the barrel vanished, he did, indeed, see them panicking as they recalled he had the ability to pull his possessions into his Pocket.

"What the—" Jaune stared at the cat that had appeared where the barrel once stood. A felyne, to be specific. "Escha? Why were you in the barrel!?"

"Ehehe…" Escha rubbed her ear with a paw, nervous.

Jaune whipped his head to the three Hunters. "Did you guys know about this?"

"They did," Tattletale confirmed before they could.

The story spilled out from there.

Escha had asked for their help last night, after Jaune and Tattletale went to bed, and the group concocted this plan. Since they intended to put together a parting gift anyway, why not store it all in a barrel? Then rig a false bottom for Escha to hide inside? That way, she could come along through the portal, and go explore other universes!

"I told you that I still don't know if the portal is anything but a one-way trip!" Jaune scolded them.

They didn't get it. Or they did, and didn't care. To the cat, the risk of leaving forever would be worth it for the chance of a lifetime.

Her friends? They were cheering her on, telling her to follow her dream.

"Look, Jaune. Even if she isn't here, we'll know she's doing okay out there, and that's enough for us," Logy explained, pointing to the sky and what lay beyond.

Jaune retorted, "There's a thousand things that could kill us, kill her, during our travels!"

"Are you going to let it happen without a fight?" Linca asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Well… no."

"Then we don't see a reason to worry," Logy said. "Like you told me before, there's not always monsters out there, and I want Escha to experience that kind of place. It's her curiosity that led her to the New World, and now it's leading her to her next destination, with you. And someday, Escha will find her way home, where she'd tell us all about her adventures. This isn't farewell."

These guys…

They were too carefree, too hopeful. Too good.

Appealing to their emotions was impossible, when the strength of their hearts were already guiding their actions.

So, Jaune cheated and turned to Tattletale for help. Her logic would win the day.

Before Tattletale's sharp tongue could cut down the foolish, kind Hunters, Escha leapt upon the girl to hug her around the neck.

"Please, please, please, please, please!" the cat pleaded. "I loved your stories, and I want to hear more about everything! About Aladdin! And Robin Hood! And Sherlock Holmes!"

Pressing close, she let Tattletale feel her fluffy, fluffy white fur, and the soft rumble of her purr.

Tattletale scoffed at the blatant and, frankly, amateurish attempt to sway her mind. Rolling her eyes, she turned Escha around so she could hug the felyne into her chest, the head tucked under her chin.

Then, she looked at Jaune with a slight grimace of embarrassment and defeat.

"...I'm okay with it."

Jaune slapped a hand over his face.

"Alright. Guess that's that. I give up. Escha can come with us."

A cheer went up among the monster Hunters, and he had to smile at just how honest and happy it was. Lifting his head, he continued to speak.

"The rest of you, get over here. I've got a present for all of you, too. A little thing called Aura."

He grinned, as did the Hunters.

"Those monsters won't know what hit 'em."

Universe: Monster Hunter. Location: Ancient Forest.
Event: Rathalos Hunt.
Loot: Red Rook gunlance, Rathalos armor, healing herbs, antidote herbs, sleep herbs, blue mushroom, mandragora mushrooms, might seeds, adamant seeds, flashbugs, thunderbugs, godbugs, bitterbugs, bees, healing potions, energy drinks, antidotes, various potion recipes, food ingredients, whetstones, gunlance spare parts, explosive shells, shell recipes, Meowscular Chef-approved gains, mosswines (x4).

~Ting-a-ling~ Escha the Palico has joined the party!



Author's Notes: After writing this, I kind of want to replay MHW now.
.

Lisa—Jaune, chase that bone!
Jaune—Woof! Woof, woof, woof!
.

Chekhov's abs.
.

The felicitous furry feline finds friendship in the flippant and felonious fox.
.

Of the Monster Hunter weapons:

Longsword—too different a style, for the same result of a sword
Dual blades—ditto, and he dislikes dual-wielders beside.
Greatsword, Insect Glaive, Hunting Horn, Light Bow Gun, Bow, Switchaxe—I'm just not familiar with them.
Hammer—a good option, but the best moves—spin to win!—relied too much on MH logic to translate well.
Heavy Bow Gun—clashes with Jaune's method of fighting.


Then there's the weapons with shields!

Sword and Shield—Redundant. He already has a set.
Charge Blade—We can do a sweet, sweet upgrade for Crocea Mors, but how do those phials even work, lorewise? Is it ripping monster lifeforce out of the flesh it cuts? Would that work on non-monsters? Many questions, few answers.
Lance—Similar in that swing, swing, block lifestyle; different enough that it doesn't replace Crocea Mors. A wonderful choice… were it not for the gunlance with its mechashift aesthetic.
Gunlance—A lance. It's also a gun.
 
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Chapter 32: A Job for This Otherworld Dropout New
With a tap, Jaune sent the four mosswines from the apartment. They're in a better place now, off to wherever sold things go.

…Okay, in all honesty, he expected the piggies to end up in a restaurant kitchen somewhere. Not one of the five-star ones, either; they fetched a pretty low price in the Marketplace. Mosswines may be delicious from what the Hunters said, but that probably translated to nothing special in the wider universes, what with food able to grant immortality or give your fist the destructive strength of a ship cannon. It wasn't even rare like wyvern meat, nor as tasty. Selling the lot got him two hundred Points.

To Jaune, it was the cherry on top of a fruitful trip.

New protective armor, an extra weapon to expand his repertoire, a whole host of useful materials that can multiply, and now this? Life was good.

Passing by the dining table, he tossed the Company scroll onto the surface. It landed near Lisa who paid it little attention. The girl was engrossed in her laptop, flipping from one website to another at blistering speed in an attempt to stuff her brain full of knowledge, all in the admirable goal of someday exploiting them to strike it rich.

Lisa did not aspire to be an academic. She aspired to own the academy.

If she didn't die starving first, of course.

Pausing in his steps, he said, "Eat your breakfast, Lisa. It's getting cold."

The reminder snapped her out of her fugue. "Oh, oops." She stabbed at the plate of chicken salad with a fork. "I got to a really interesting part and—wait a second, salads are supposed to be cold." She glared at him.

"And your plate's supposed to be empty. Come on, don't you want more gains?" He flexed his arms as emphasis.

The food that Logy and the others included in their gift was another boon he won't soon forget. Chock-full of nutrients and 'bioenergy,' it practically reshaped Jaune and Lisa after each meal, with the incremental changes stacking up over the course of three days already matching what they'd see after a couple weeks of physical exercise and good dieting. Combine that with the daily training, and Lisa was advancing in leaps and bounds in terms of fitness—she's reached forty push-ups in a row now! Meanwhile, the weight of the gunlance grew lighter in his hand by the day.

Shame that nobody in this apartment ever learned how to prepare a live pig for cooking. The mosswines might have earned themselves a spot here otherwise, and ended up in his stomach instead of someone else's. (He assumed this was the highest aspiration of edible food everywhere.)

Lisa stared at him posing for a good, long while. Then, mumbling half-hearted protests, she pulled the plate closer and got to work devouring the oversized portion. Jaune considered it a victory.

With the uphill job that was turning Lisa into a warrior handled for the moment, he moved on, filling a bucket with water from the sink before navigating through the growing piles of supplies towards the window. The newest member of their team was there, frolicking among the haphazard garden of glass jars that had overtaken the area, each hosting a medicinal plant or mushroom. She held a cup between her paws, and was using it to carefully water the garden.

"Escha, here's some more."

The felyne turned to look up at him, beaming. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome." He placed the bucket next to another that was almost empty, then squatted down to put himself at her height. "Anything I can do to help?"

She nodded. "The bugs need to drink, too. Can you please pour a little bit in the terra… terra…"

"Terrarium?"

"That!"

"Sure thing," he said. Grabbing the near-empty bucket, he scooted over to the insect cage that they repurposed from a blue delivery box. It would have been more than enough for normal bugs, but was a little small for the collection of fist-sized beetles now calling it home, especially after Escha added a bunch of random knick-knacks she pulled from the cabinets to clutter up the terrarium.

Beetles, like people, couldn't just live in a blank room of four walls and a ceiling. Nor could they thrive in this cramped a space.

Still, they had food, shelter, and—he tipped the bucket to soak a corner of the box with moisture—water. Serviceable conditions, if not ideal.

That done, Jaune sat down on the floor, where he began asking Escha for tips on the best ways to take care of the different plants and bugs. Gardening was a hobby right up until it could mix into a potion to save his life; he'd rather the specimens didn't die. And while the cat might have an uncertain grasp on bigger human words, it had no bearing on the fact that she was an expert on a wide range of subjects related to her work as a Palico, horticulture among them. He learned quite a lot by just listening to her.

More than that, he wanted to keep Escha company.

It had hit the felyne in the middle of her first night here, what it meant to be a universe away from home. He had woken up the next morning with a mass of white fur snoozing atop his face.

She's been doing better since then, courtesy of the treasure trove that was the apartment. Everything fascinated her, from the kitchen appliances, to the clothes they wore, to Jaune's scroll and the music on it. By the end of the second day, wonder had won out over homesickness.

Oh, and—

Whirr, whirr, whirr.

Escha's eyes flew wide open. She peeked behind him, head turning to follow the cleaning robot that had once again taken to zooming around the room. They've yet to figure out its schedule, with the robot activating at what seemed like random intervals, but Escha wasn't concerned about that.

The cup she held was handed off to Jaune so that she could drop on all four paws. Slinking past him, she hopped up the nearby couch, padding along the backrest over to the other end. There, she crouched in wait with an intense focus as the unsuspecting robot carried on its business, unaware.

After a few minutes, it passed by her vantage point, well within range. Escha pounced.

The poor robot stood no chance.

Unable to resist, Jaune raised his scroll and snapped a picture of the aftermath. If the device were to ever run out of storage space, it would be because of that ball of fur curled atop the cleaning robot. Checking the picture, and seeing how content Escha looked lying on her favorite perch, he had to smile.

Yes, wonder had won out over homesickness, and their new companion would be okay. Slowly but surely, life settled into a new routine, with three where there were once two.

Which made this a good time to shake things up.

"Escha?"

Pointy ears twitched. The cat poked her head up. "That's me!"

"Ready to go traveling?" he asked.

The happy meow said it all.


-o-


Universe: KonoSuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World! Location: City of Axel
Event: Emergency Cabbage Harvest


Axel, a city by the river.

Sensibly surrounded by tall walls to keep the dangers outside, its people lived peaceful lives so far as Jaune could see. With bright-colored roofs and a thousand smiles, this place was, dare he say, idyllic. A wonderful destination for Escha's first foray into the many worlds out there.

"God, we are so in the boonies," Tattletale groaned.

He looked around again, wondering if she had seen something he didn't. They were standing on the corner of a bustling shopping street, with one colorful storefront after the next putting on attention-grabbing displays. Two long lines of carts and carriages traveled on the road, with the pedestrians crisscrossing it as they pleased. "What are you talking about? Sure, it's not what I'd call a city-city, but this is solidly in the upper range of a settlement. Hell, it reminds me of my hometown."

"Yup, the boonies."

"Oi."

Lisa rolled her eyes. "No power lines. No vehicles more advanced than a carriage." She stamped her foot twice on the cobblestone. Her cloak swished with the motion. "No asphalt. We're at least 150 years behind modern times."

When put like that, he supposed she had a point. His home, at least, featured some of the amenities common in Vale, if a little dated in comparison to the capital. Axel resembled one of those old-timey, pre-Great War paintings where all the ladies wore dresses at a picnic.

A girl with silver hair passed by him, and their eyes met. She gave him a wink, continuing on her way.

Well, maybe not dresses.

"I guess it's summer here." Shorts and a crop top? That seemed pretty modern to him. And those pretty eyes…

Tattletale snapped her fingers in front of his face. "Focus! We're not here to mess around."

"Uh, no, we're here to do exactly that," he retorted. "That's the whole goal of this trip, so we could ease Escha into things." Jaune paused. "Although, I gotta say we made a good pick." He waved a hand at the normal, everyday scenes. "The cabbage harvest part was already a clue, but Axel looks even less dangerous than I expected."

"There are people carrying weapons, so it can't be completely safe," Tattletale pointed out.

He nodded in agreement. "True. You know what it reminds me of? Fantasy video games."

"How so?"

He indicated a quartet on the other side of the street. "The ones that are armed tend to move in groups. In teams. That blondie at the front? He's carrying a sword. Guy behind him, sword and shield. Next guy, a bow. The girl bringing up the rear—"

"A staff," she murmured.

"With an orb at the end," he added. "A magic staff. And they're the classic party line-up for going on a quest."

Tattletale was nodding now. "I can sorta see that. It's like one of those tabletop games, and would explain the weird fashion sense."

"Practical, you mean?"

Shorts, crop tops, leather pants, capes, miniskirts, bare-chested with spiky metal shoulder pads. These were just some of the types of clothing that came into popularity due to the advent of Huntsmen and Huntresses in the decades following the Great War. Whether for freedom of movement or hardiness or whatever else, each style had its merits. Presumably, their local analogues sparked the same developments in this world.

"Weird," she insisted. "The clothes don't match this level of civilization. But, anyway, if there's magical goods here, then Axel might hold more promise than we thought. How about this, you go with Escha as planned to harvest cabbages, and I'll investigate."

He cocked an eyebrow. "You're not using this as an excuse to skip menial work, are you?"

"No way," she answered quickly. Suspiciously so.

"Uh-huh. Well, I'm against it, in any case. Today is about helping Escha settle in. She'd want you there." He struck with a low blow.

The confident smirk suggested Tattletale had a ready argument waiting in the wing. A flash of white rushing between the legs of the passing pedestrians stopped her.

Escha appeared from the crowd, back from her carefree jaunt—ahem, her very serious scouting trip of their immediate surroundings. Running on all fours, missing her pouches and armor pieces, she was in her disguised form at the moment. Nobody who took note of the big, long-haired cat would suspect her of being a big, long-haired cat that talks.

She screeched to a halt before them, looking proud with a grilled fish on a skewer clamped between her teeth that she held up for Jaune.

"Hey, hey, look what I got! Want some?"

"Thanks, Escha. Don't mind if I do." Leaning down, he accepted the skewer and bit off a mouthful. "Oh! It's delicious!"

"Isn't it?" gushed the Palico, forgetting that she was supposed to play the part of a cat that did nothing but meow. "I was just in front of the stall to smell the yummy fish, but the fisher lady let me have this one!" The entire time Escha spoke, her gaze had not strayed from the skewer, mouth watering.

As an experiment, Jaune moved the fish to the left. Her eyes went left. He moved it to the right. She followed with rapt attention.

He took a second bite, then passed the skewer down to her. "Want the rest? I'm still full from breakfast."

Escha didn't need much prompting, seizing the fish with both paws—another slipup they would have to work on. After offering it to Tattletale, who shook her head no, she happily dug into the snack.

Above her head, Jaune noticed Tattletale biting her lips in indecision, and he said in a low voice, "Oh, come on. Don't."

"She'd agree to it," was the blithe reply. Or so she tried to play it off as. Tattletale wasn't doing her usual grin.

"It's her first day."

"...I hate you."

"Heh. Don't look so glum. A few hours work will get us paid in local money, and we can go browse the stores. I'll bet they can be convinced to accept gold, too."

The proposal mollified her somewhat, and Jaune rode the momentum to wave down a passerby. The middle-aged man in rough working clothes was wary of them at first, but his face cleared up as he listened to their inquiry on the location of the cabbage harvesting activities.

"You'll be wanting the adventurer's guild. Take a turn at the next intersection, and it'd be near the end of the street. Look for that tower." The man pointed to a tall watchtower covered in—Jaune squinted his eyes—gramophone speakers?

While he would like to get the story behind that design choice, another tidbit took precedence. "Adventurer's guild? Not the farmer's association or something?"

"Oh no, this is best left to that lot. It's too dangerous!"

He looked at the man oddly.

"What?" the man asked.

Reluctant to out their group for what seemed to be common knowledge, he said, "No, it's nothing. Thanks for the help." The moment the man left, he turned to Tattletale. "Something's up with the cabbages. Or that guy."

She shrugged her shoulders. "Maybe they're zombie vegetables. We'll find out the specifics at the guild."

The adventurer's guild (and didn't that just make one feel giddy hearing it? Like a video game!) was a grand building, eye-catching in the peculiar way that government buildings were. Stately, was the word people often used. Big and officious, to intimidate as much as impress.

That perception changed once they walked inside. The main lobby might have conducted very important business in the past, but it looked as if someone had decided that a restaurant made more money, with tables stacked in rows and waitresses moving between them. Despite the morning hours, there were adventurers deep in their cups, or ordering a feast to celebrate completion of a late-night job. A bulletin board drew a good half of the visitors. Occasionally, a team would snatch a slip of paper off of it, before rushing out of the building on their quest.

"It's like the Astera canteen!" Escha squealed.

"Did that cat just talk? Hey, Aqua, cats in this world can talk. Wouldn't that make a cooler pet than your rabbit?"

"Don't be silly, Kazuma. It was probably that girl and you misheard. Also, Sir Bunny D. Fluffy is the strongest member of the party after me. Show him some respect."

"Excuse me!? My Explosion—"

"Ahhhh don't start chanting here!"

The attention their trio garnered lasted only a brief few seconds before it was lost in the general commotion. Adventurers, similar to Hunters, seemed a boisterous lot quick to gravitate towards new entertainment. Jaune capitalized on it to hurry his companions along.

The back wall was taken up by a reception counter, and judging by the forms being signed and clinking coins exchanging hands, the people in uniform stationed there were the guild staff. Deeming it their best bet to gain information, their party joined one of the briskly-moving queues. Soon, they stood in front of an employee.

"Jaune, why did you pick this line?"

"Because it's the closest?"

"Uh-huh. It wasn't because of the pretty lady?"

"Course not."

The wavy-haired employee coughed into a fist to draw their gazes, before giving them a gentle smile. "Welcome to the adventurer's guild. My name is Luna, a guild receptionist. How may I help you today?"

"Good morning~." Tattletale seized the lead, leaning forward to put her elbows on the counter. "We would like to request more information on the cabbage harvest. Do you know if there are still openings available?"

Luna blinked blankly for a moment, before her gaze drifted to something behind the counter. She began to frown.

Tattletale broke the silence, speaking quickly, "Because, you see, my friend and I thought that this was the prime harvest season for it. So I figured, hey, why not check in and maybe pick up a job?" She hesitated a beat, suddenly looking down at her feet, nervous. "I-I wasn't wrong about it, was I? It should be this month. I could have sworn it was. P-Please don't tell me we traveled all this way for nothing!"

Jaune resisted the urge to applaud her act—or maybe gag. If he didn't know any better, he would believe her to be a shy, innocent girl from the countryside in great distress.

The receptionist hurried to reassure her. "Oh no, sweetie, you weren't wrong!" The budding suspicion faded from her face, replaced by a far kinder expression. "My apologies, I was simply astounded by the coincidence. We do indeed have a request to help hunt down the cabbages."

There's the strange connotation again. Hunt down?

"In fact," Luna said with a soft chuckle, "you could not have come at a more opportune time. The guild is preparing to make the announcement within the hour for our adventurers." She caught Jaune's wince. "Am I right in that you two have yet to register as members?"

Tattletale nodded her head, in a surprising move opting for the truth. "We can do that here, can't we? Unless it's too late?"

"Not at all, miss. I can help you with the process. Now, I must note that there is a registration fee of 1,000 Eris for each person."

What currency was 'Eris'? Were they cards like Lien? Paper? Gold?

Tattletale's innocent act didn't work this time despite her doubling down on the 'poor girl traveling a long distance' story. Luna's polite demeanor remained firm, if sympathetic. The fee was a sticking point. An IOU won't cut it.

Jaune interceded, fishing a gold coin from his Pocket that he held out to Tattletale. "Hey, there's this coin we found in the…" His mind raced for a good excuse. "The ruins near our village. Is it worth anything?"

Tattletale beamed at him. She snatched the coin and slapped it on the counter, looking expectantly at the receptionist.

"A coin from the ruins?" Luna reached for it with their permission, holding the coin up to the light—what source powered the light fixtures, Jaune couldn't tell, and he chalked it down to magic. "Hmmm. I don't believe I have ever seen this design. It looks like gold, and an almost comparable size to a ten-thousand Eris coin, but we will have to appraise it to confirm, if that is acceptable?"

"It is," said Jaune.

Luna waved down a coworker, who took the coin before removing to another room. During that time, she chatted with them on the responsibilities of an adventurer—protecting the town and surrounding area, responding to threats, basically everything a Huntsman did—which boded well as it suggested a measure of confidence that they weren't trying to swindle her with the coin.

And they're not. They may be lying through their teeth about everything else, but that coin? 'Tis gold, thank you.

That matched the verdict Luna's coworker gave, upon his return. The purity was a tad lower than the local currency, meaning they got back a small stack of eight coins, each worth 1,000 Eris. Jaune submitted three of the coins to Luna, pocketing the rest.

"Wonderful!" the receptionist exclaimed as she retrieved three rectangular sheets—each was a bit bigger than a person's hand—stored below the counter, passing one to Jaune, one to Tattletale, and one to the person standing next in line. "Then let me be the first to welcome you to the adventurer's guild. These are your adventurer cards. Please fill them out now, then tap the bottom left corner. Once set, a card is linked by magic to its owner, and will be very important in your line of work as it allows you to choose a job class—"

Interrupting, Jaune said, "Hang on a second?" Turning, he plucked the card from the very confused person behind their group, then bent down to pick up Escha and placed her on the counter.

With solemn dignity, Escha accepted her adventurer card.

"Sorry," Jaune said, dipping his head in apology to the receptionist, "but this is our third member, not that guy. Please, go on."

Luna's smile, so kind and gentle this whole time, twitched.

"This is a cat."

Jaune looked at her in blank incomprehension.

"Cats cannot become adventurers," the receptionist explained, enunciating each word slowly and clearly for his benefit. "Leaving aside the sheer absurdity of the idea, for the underlying magic of our adventurer cards to work in the first place, it requires the subject"— *ding!* —"to be sentieeent?"

A long lull ensued, filled with choking noises as the receptionist stared at the completed card held between Escha's paws. It dragged on to the point where Jaune started to worry this was a medical emergency. But then, her expression smoothed out to a picture perfect smile.

"Then let me be the first to welcome you to the adventurer's guild. These are your adventurer cards. Please fill them out now, then tap the bottom left corner. Once set…"

A perturbed Tattletale murmured under her breath, "Why is she repeating herself?"

"I think I broke her," Jaune said.

"...allows you to choose a job class. Note your level located near your p-portrait."

They weren't portraits, really, just silhouettes in the likeness of a card's owner. Escha's card depicted the shape of a cat.

"The level corresponds to the amount of Experience Points, the fragments of the soul which exist in every living thing that you will absorb, whether it comes from foes you kill or creatures you cook and eat. That number is displayed next to your level. As you accumulate Experience Points, you will grow stronger, a phenomenon known as leveling up. This grants you skill points which can be used to learn new skills, depending on your stats."

Soooo, video game logic that was realized through magic. Got it. Wild and unbelievable, but got it.

"Jaune, you're turning red. Are you okay?" Tattletale asked in concern.

"If she's serious and everything is true, defeating monsters can grant us Experience Points."

"Yeah?"

"I killed a Rathalos, a damn dragon, right before I got this card. So it doesn't count."

What was this feeling in his chest, the desire to scream and scream and never stop?

"Oof. Tough luck."

"Um." The receptionist raised a hand. "I don't quite understand, but why not try to look on the bright side? You might have missed out on the Experience Points from a, ah, a 'dragon.' That's one enemy. There are many more foes to slay out in the world. From now on, you will only get stronger."

That… okay, that did make him feel a little better.

Things didn't work out. What's new? Story of his life. If he was going to wallow in regrets, he'd be here all night. The best way to change that was by taking a step forward.

"You know what, you're right." His back straightened. "I just have to think of all the dragons I'm beating up in the future."

Luna giggled. "Yes, 'dragons.' I wholeheartedly wish you luck in the endeavor, but remember to pace yourself, okay? Don't take risks. And before everything else, you should pick a job class. Your many adventures can come after that. Here, allow me to help."

For new members, a box on the right side could be tapped on to generate a list of jobs fitting their parameters. It even included a scroll down function, proving that magic was carrying the technology hard in this world, emulating functions Jaune swore shouldn't have occurred to people yet.

Assisting him, the receptionist analyzed his stats with a practiced eye. "High strength and Vitality, average in dexterity and agility. That would open up most of the warrior branches—I can definitely see it~." She raked her gaze over him. "Although, how strange. You should have enough magic to qualify for the Paladin job but the option isn't here."

His neglect of Outsider worship was probably responsible for that.

"Still, that leaves you with quite a few options. Fighter, barbarian, shieldmaster, huntsman, crossbow—"

He slapped both hands on the counter. "Huntsman."

"A-Are you certain? That job, while it could be taken, benefits the most from agility, with vitality and strength in minor roles."

"Huntsman," he repeated, determined gaze rooting the receptionist in place.

With what looked like an anguished expression on her face, she confirmed the selection. A shaking hand returned his adventurer card to him. He paid it no mind, a fluttering giddiness welling up within him upon reading the new job title emblazoned below his portrait, which now sported a pointy cap decorated with a feather.


Job: Huntsman
Skill Points: 2
Current Skill List
[Sense Rabbit]
[Set Bait Trap]

Available Skills
[Marksmanship]


…Something's wrong.

These weren't the skills associated with heroically killing terrible beasties and saving townsfolk. Why?

The answer, when he asked it aloud, came from Tattletale. There was a Huntsman, and then there was a huntsman. One protected the world from the rising darkness, keeping the ravening hordes of monsters at bay. The other was a man who hunts. Like, for food.

Sighing, Jaune purchased Marksmanship, and stowed the card away in his Pocket. At the very least, he now had improved aim.

Up next was Tattletale.

"You have high intelligence," began Luna.

Tattletale puffed up in pride.

"But middling to low on everything else. Especially magic. I'm sorry, I don't think you can cast spells at all."

"...I didn't want to, anyway…"

It seemed Magical Girl Lisa shall never see the light of day.

Once they moved on to the job list, Jaune peeked over her shoulder to see what options she could pick, as was surprised by the shining border that ringed the entry at the top of the list. It denoted a rare job according to the receptionist, to stoke his envy.


Job: Politician
Current Skill List
[Set Bait Trap (Verbal)]


Tattletale scratched her head. "The heck? No. Why is that even on there?"

It fits you to a tee, Jaune refrained from saying aloud, as they checked the next choice.


Job: Scammer
Current Skill List
[Hidden Smirk]
[Grab Attention]



"Oh, fuck you," she spat venomously at the card. By now, the receptionist was eying her with great suspicion.

In the end, she chose the job of Scholar. It had no combat applications. However, the starting skill claimed to increase her reading speed, with Luna mentioning that future options include better memory retention and delaying sleep to burn the midnight candle for days at a time. Subtle skills that complemented her core strengths.

It just… It didn't wow anybody, which Jaune thought might have been something she was hoping for. More than once, he caught her sneaking looks at his card, comparing it to hers. Having one's capabilities quantified into numbers was turning out to be a sobering experience for the girl. She owned two stats higher than his, intelligence and dexterity, the second one winning by only a couple of points. All in all, she wasn't that special.

He would have to cheer her up in some way later.

It was with trepidation that the receptionist picked up the last adventurer card. All of them put their heads together for that one, the curiosity too strong to ignore.


Job: Cat
Current Skill List
[Feline Battlecry]
[Feline Climbing]



"Seriously?" shouted the receptionist, her composure gone, as the people closest to them craned their neck to catch a peek. Someone gasped.

"Kazuma! Kazuma! If we get an adventurer card for Baron Bunny D. Fluffy, we can level up—"

"We are not helping that apocalyptic murderbeast become even more broken! And you two! Do you think the Adventurer's guild is some kind of joke?"

That seemed to have been directed at their party in particular, so Jaune turned around, as did Tattletale and Escha. The receptionist, meanwhile, had brightened upon seeing someone else voicing the thoughts she could not. Her face quickly fell as she recognized who it was.

The boy there couldn't be any older than Jaune, and unless he had a baby-face, must be younger by a year or two. Dressed in hardy garb suited for the outdoors, he wore a sword on his hip. Arrayed behind him stood a group of girls, his adventuring party at a guess. A witch, a knight, and a drunk.

Though, the knight was fidgeting, and stayed at a remove. Maybe she wasn't part of the team?

"Who are you?" Jaune asked.

"Hmph!" The boy flicked his cape. His voice, a deep baritone, declared, "I am Satou Kazuma, an adventurer. And as your senior, let me give you some advice."

One of his party members, a girl with blue hair and a half-empty wine bottle, piped up, "But Kazuma, we finished our first quest yesterday—"

"Ahhh, don't tell them that!" The panicking Kazuma, voice reverting to a higher pitch, slapped his hands over the girl's mouth. "It counts! It totally counts!"

As the pair struggled back and forth, Jaune leaned down near Tattletale's ear. "What's his problem with us?"

"Oh, it's not much of a mystery." Tattletale flashed her teeth. Less smile, more cat that scented prey. "This insecure boy saw a chance to throw his weight around now that he isn't the newest face around here, and couldn't resist."

The boy, Kazuma, spun back to them. "That's not true!" The red glow to his face said different. "I was just—"

"Jealous?" Tattletale suggested. "Oh ho! Right in one. You've been paying a lot of attention to us. To me?" She struck a pose, cocking her hip. "Hmmmm. Not quite. Why, I'm offended, mister Satou Kazuma."

Kazuma spluttered excuses, but unfortunately for him, Tattletale was having fun.

She tapped her chin with a finger. "I suppose it's more accurate to say you're jealous of Jaune, with me as one of the reasons. I wonder what the others are?" She gave an exaggerated look between Jaune and Kazuma, calling on everyone to wonder.

The suppressed laughter and snorts that soon arose within the crowd suggested that people were reaching the conclusions she wanted them to make.

The difference in stature. The way each boy stood. The face.

For a moment, Kazuma looked like he wanted to cry. That led Jaune to realize that things were getting nasty, fast, and he moved to rein Tattletale back. They didn't need to put anyone down to assert dominance.

But then, the other boy recovered to display a sly grin.

"A man is measured by the company he keeps," declared Kazuma.

Silence.

Then, clamoring.

A wave of murmurs washed over the onlookers as they considered this sentiment. Many found that they agreed with it. The tide began to shift the other way, because people were no longer judging the two boys on their own, but on the quality of their respective adventuring groups. The equipment, the numbers, the human-to-cat ratio. The faces.

The knight raised her hand. "Kazuma, does that mean I am now—"

"Yep," Kazuma said without even glancing at her, so he missed the look of pure joy on the knight's face as she scooted closer, cutting the distance between her and the rest of the party members down to zero.

Oi! Dirty! Recruiting mid-battle to pad the numbers was unfair!

And, yes, it was a battle to Jaune now. Being the better person took a backseat once his pride got dragged into the matter.

"This isn't my full team," he said, thinking of the NPR of JNPR, who definitely counted if they were talking about teammates.

Kazuma made a show of scanning their surroundings. "Oh? Where are they, then?"

"Around." In another universe. Frozen in time. Still counted.

The other boy smirked, conveying all that needed be said. 'Around' was not 'present,' and maybe not 'exists' either. Proof, or get out.

Jaune debated the merits of pulling out his scroll. A photo of him with his team would settle it in a decisive manner. He could just say the device was magic.

Tattletale seized his sleeve the moment his hand twitched towards his pocket. "Jaune, no."

"But he's—"

"No," she insisted. "Look, I think this has really gotten away from us all, and we should calm down. Alright?"

What could he do, in the face of that gentle smile? Taking a deep breath, Jaune released the tension in his shoulders, and with a clearer head, he started to understand how silly he had been to become so riled up. They'd be here a day. Any clout he attained would vanish with tomorrow.

She patted him on the arm. "It's no good to get caught in someone else's pace. Besides, a team isn't about numbers."

"Yeah… wait. I think numbers might be in the literal definition of the word. Like, you need more than one person to make a team."

Kazuma chimed in, "He's got a point."

"Okay, you know what?" Tattletale whirled on Kazuma, the mask of gentleness slipping off her face. "I tried to be diplomatic, but having more people doesn't amount to squat. There, I said it."

"Oh, really?"

"Really," she shot back. "A proper team depends on the effectiveness of its members. Shove a bunch of clueless idiots together, and all you'd have is a mob, right?" She addressed this to the onlookers, sweeping her gaze around the room.

Behind her, Jaune muttered, "Whatever happened to calming down?"

"And don't forget," Kazuma hissed out of the corner of his mouth. "She had a huge part to play in how things ended up here before she tried to sell herself as the peacemaker."

"Making us look bad in comparison."

"How underhanded of her."

Tattletale ignored them. "The point is, it's skill that matters most. Everything else is small stuff if you have good people." She nodded sagely.

That struck a chord with the crowd, and Jaune could get why. As professionals who made a living batting monsters beyond the city walls, they must have learned that very same lesson through experience. There were things out there for which no fancy swords or simple force of numbers can match.

"So you're saying we need to prove our skills?" he said.

Tattletale balked. "What? No. Why would you even think that? I said it to settle your stupid argument."

"I dunno, the man's on to something," said Kazuma. "This does call for a match."

Jaune nodded. "Exactly. And there happens to be a special event today, isn't there?"

"The cabbages have been sighted on the horizon! They're flying straight for us! Everyone, it's time to harvest cabbages!"

The announcement cut through the hubbub, amplified to be heard far and wide beyond the building. In its wake, a cheer erupted from every adventurer except for four.

Jaune, Tattletale, Escha, and Kazuma, who were just plain confused.

"The cabbages are doing what?" Escha asked with her head tilted to the side.

"I knew that cat could talk!"


-o-​


In this world, cabbages fly.

Every year, at the moment they ripened, cabbages would take flight to avoid being eaten, entire fields of the vegetables journeying across the land in a great migration. They attacked anyone and anything that dared to stop them, necessitating evacuations of the townsfolk while the adventurers put on their farmer hats (armor) and farmer tools (big, big swords). As harvest season came, the curtains rose on a glorious battle of eat or be eaten.

And they have eyes, sort of.

Jaune still wasn't sure how he felt about that.

Although, these cabbages were delicious. After he smacked one too hard with his sword and it burst into a bunch of cabbage leaves, he was poking around to find if they had a brain or another creature inside, and that turned into a taste test when the search turned up nothing of note. He has never regretted it since then. Crisp and fresh, the leaf boasted a sweetness that compared to fruits, the tinge of bitterness towards the end adding a counterbalance to complete the experience.

"Twenty-two. Twenty-three. Aaaand, twenty-four!"

He dispelled [Third Arm] and batted the last cabbage into the sack, tightening the string to prevent his harvest from escaping. With so many together, they were reaching the critical mass required to lift him in the air, and the sack floated behind him as he hurried back to the guild's command post for a drop-off. A familiar face greeted him.

"T-Thank you for your contribution!" said Luna, the receptionist. She never quite recovered from their earlier encounter, and Jaune suspected he had a part to play in the empty bottles poorly hidden behind her. "Let's see here. One, two, three… twenty, twenty-one, twenty-two in total."

Say what? Jaune looked down at the trussed-up cabbages. Counting one by one, the number he arrived at was twenty-two, as Luna determined. Quickly, he checked how many heads of cabbages he had hidden in his Pocket. Fifteen additional specimens, stowed away to be absconded with, due to their Experience Point-rich deliciousness. That number had remained the same for a while, meaning he didn't shove some more inside the Pocket by mistake. Was he just bad at math?

"Coming through," said a voice behind him. Kazuma pushed past a second later, a sack over his back and two cabbages tucked under his arm which he offered to Luna. "Can you get these two first?"

As the receptionist did so, the other boy turned to Jaune and stuck out his tongue, while his hand made a strange wiggling motion.

On Jaune's next trip, he discovered the significance of it.

"Steal!"

The word would have been lost in the general commotion, had not for a sudden lull in the cabbage swarm at this part of the field. Jaune turned his head to see Kazuma with a cabbage held in his hands. The other boy had a deer in headlights look as he stared back.

With deliberate slowness, Jaune opened the sack to tally up his harvest.

There were some missing.

"Cheateeer!" Jaune shouted, pointing at Kazuma.

Kazuma avoided his gaze, looking to the side. "I don't know what you're talking about. We never set rules on what skills are and aren't allowed. The only condition is whoever gets the most cabbages, wins." He raised the prize secured in his grasp. "Which will be me."

"That's how it's going to be, huh? I'll make a note of that." The rocket boots might see use, in that case. Screw holding back. "Oh, by the way. Where's your party?"

"Around."

Past him, Jaune saw one of them clear on the other side of the field, running from cabbages whilst crying. Another stood motionless as cabbages took turns outright dive-bombing her from the sky. The last laid flat on her face near Luna, magic spent after letting loose a giant explosion which wiped out a bunch of random monsters that tried to poach the harvest, and made Jaune fear for his life.

"Ha. So much for your vaunted team, 'Satou Kazuma the senior adventurer.'"

"You're alone, too! Where's your team, you blonde bastard?"

"It's Jaune Arc. And they're hard at work, same as me. Because we all contribute to the success of the party, and—"

"Not working together."

"—not working toge-ack!" That was close. He almost fell for the masterful manipulation! "I mean, the situation doesn't require us to be in one place. We stationed ourselves where we each would do the most good."

"Jaune, Jaune, heeeelp!"

They turned in the direction of the cry. A small sack, presumably filled with cabbages, drifted along a few yards off the ground. A fluffy mass of white fur dangled from it, front paws gripping tight and little feet wiggling to no avail.

Below her, Tattletale hopped up and down, too short to reach the felyne.

"...We're working out a few kinks."

"Glad I'm not the only one," Kazuma whispered to himself, not quiet enough. Before Jaune could hurry off to rescue Escha, the other boy stretched out his hand. "Steal."

A cabbage appeared, and without it adding to the buoyancy alongside its brethren, the sack started to lower, soon putting Escha back on solid ground. She looked their way, and waved her arms while shouting her thanks.

Kazuma noticed Jaune's glance. "What?"

"That's such a broken skill." Jaune cracked a grin. "But thanks for the help."

The other boy shrugged. "I like cats," he said simply.

"Funny. Same here." He cocked his head. "Then again, I like most kinds of animals. The only ones I can't deal with are rabbits."/"Rabbits."

By heretofore unknown instincts, they fist-bumped. Because fuck rabbits.

" So you're going to give that cabbage back, right?" Jaune asked.

Kazuma responded by scooting away a step. Jaune followed suit, putting them side by side again.

"Right?" He repeated.

"This is a finder's fee."

"It's theft. You literally said 'steal' as you stole it."

They grappled for the vegetable. Jaune's strength won out, earning him a cabbage that he stored in his bag. Afterward, they both returned to the conversation, as if nothing happened.

Kazuma said, "Why do you hate rabbits, anyway?"

"I was ambushed by one that tried to tear my throat out," Jaune revealed.

"What a coincidence. Me too, except it's been almost every day."

"Does this place have an infestation of killer rabbits or something? Asking for a friend."

Kazuma shook his head. "Just the one, owned by my useless party member. She said she bought it off a glowy screen in a pub bathroom stall that wasn't there the next morning."

"That sounds…"

"I know. She was definitely drunk. But the murderbeast is here now, and for weeks it's been trying to escape and kill everyone, including her. So far, nobody believes me when I warn them about it. I'm the Boy Who Cried Rabbit."

"Hey, quick question. Which party member is it, the one with the rabbit?" Jaune asked while pressing a hand to his temple.

"She has long blue hair, with this weird-looking loop at the top. Her name's Aqua, and she—"

Jaune cut him off. "How big is the rabbit?"

"Normal size? Why?"

"It'd fit in a cage about this big, then?" He mimed the dimensions.

"Yeeees?"

"I guess that explains why my [Sense Rabbit] skill is pinging like crazy."

Kazuma looked where Jaune directed, and spotted his teammate running towards him. He began to hyperventilate. Wide, bulging eyes filled with terror zoomed in on the pet cage she was holding.

"No. Nononono. Not now."

"Kazuma!" the girl shouted. "Kazuma, I have an amazing idea!"

The boy waved his arms wildly. "Aqua! Listen to me carefully! Put that cage on the ground!"

Her eyes lit up. "I knew you'd get it!" To Kazuma's relief, Aqua stopped and followed his order to set the cage down. "Rabbits are the natural predators of cabbages, aren't they? Viscount Bunny D. Fluffy will have these stupid things running scared in no time!" She then unhooked the latch keeping the door shut.

"Did I say to let it out!?" Kazuma wailed.

From the depths of the cage, it crawled. One furry limb extended out of the darkness, the other following soon after. The head came next. A twitching nose snuffled, as if scenting blood in the air. Long ears flopped, menacingly. With a mighty hop, the foul beast leapt a full body's length to escape its prison, landing on the grass, a spot of white amidst the green.

The rabbit looked at them—at him. In those eyes, the vicious streak was clear for all to see.

And that's when Jaune knew.

"No. No, it can't be! I defeated you! You're supposed to be gone forever!"

Yet the Beast of Caerbannog was here. Here, all along.

"Welp, it's loose. We are all going to die," Kazuma said in a matter-of-fact tone.

It was that, the resignation, which awoke Jaune from his stupor. Gritting his teeth, he banished the terror in his heart to a small, distant corner, and strode forward.

"Not if I have something to say about it," he declared, surer than he had ever been.

From one moment to the next, Jaune stood bedecked in a suit of blazing red armor. One hand held a shield that could ward off the fires of wyverns. The other wielded a formidable gunlance to slay the greatest monsters in the land. His boots left scorch marks with each step.

He wasn't the same person he was back then.

"Kazuma, run. I'll deal with this beast."

Beneath a cabbage-dotted sky, man and rabbit dueled once more for their lives.


-o-​


As the portal closed, Lisa arched to stretch her body, making a long, satisfied groan with her arms reaching for the ceiling. Escha, following on her heels, copied the motion.

"Man, that was more fun than I thought!" the girl said. "Who knew an honest day's work could be so exciting?"

Jaune, back slumped, marched by her. "Oh, I'm sure it was fun for you. You didn't have to face this little fellow here." He plonked the cage down on the table. It didn't stay still, but rattled violently. A gesture of his hand, and a box materialized next to it, filled with odds and ends that they bought in Axel—a couple flasks of healing potions, an enchanted set of pillows that stays cool all through the night, dumb bells heavier than they looked, and such like. Magical goods in Axel were just too expensive to get anything with oomph. On the other side of the cage, another gesture summoned a pile of stolen cabbages.


Universe: KonoSuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World! Location: City of Axel
Event: Emergency Cabbage Harvest
Loot: Cabbages! (x26), adventurer cards, Evercool Pillow, healing potions (x2), exercise equipment, daily goods, food ingredients, Beast of Caerbannog (Earl Bunny D. Fluffy)


Dropping into a chair, he fished out the Company scroll, opening it to the inventory screen. A swipe down landed him on an entry he never thought to see again. And with a tap of his finger, there hopefully won't be a third time. The cage stopped moving.

Now that the rabbit was a long ways off and couldn't hurt her, Lisa skipped over to the table, plucking a few cabbage leaves to munch on. She shared them with Escha. "It went a lot better this round, right? Should have been no sweat… Mmmm, this is so gooood!" She held her cheek, humming in enjoyment.

No arguments there. The cabbages counted among the grand prizes they obtained from the trip. His [Sense Rabbit] pinged right up until he sold the bunny, which was proof enough that the adventurer cards were still active on this side of the portal.

That meant they could level up. And what do you know, the cabbages contained a bunch of Experience Points in their leafy deliciousness.

Sure, his Huntsman job didn't wow. For now, that was. Maybe in the future, it will wow. They shall find out.

"Have we had a world this easy?" Lisa continued. "Heck, I still don't feel tired yet. We should go for another one to hit a new record. Two worlds in one day."

Drawn by her energetic mood, he made a show of navigating to the portal app. "Well, since you're so gung-ho for it…"

"Ah no, no, no!" she jokingly cried, leaning around Escha to make half-hearted attempts at snatching away the scroll, with Jaune holding her back with his longer arm.

But then, he happened to catch what was written on the screen.

A portal swirled to life on the wall.

"Jaune! What the fuck?"

Thumb pressed to the screen, he turned to her, "I… Sorry, Lisa, but I had to. This world, it's… it's there."

Lisa grabbed the scroll. This time, he let her; it was no time for jokes. Springing up from his seat, Jaune rushed around the room, tossing supplies into his Pocket. In twenty seconds flat, he was standing in front of the portal.

"Wait. Jaune, wait."

"What's there to wait for? Lisa, we have to go!"

The scene on the other side started to come into focus. Brick walls. Strewn trash. A dark alleyway. The scent of salt in the air.

"Because this can't be right! What's written here, it's already—"

The portal flared to signal that the process had completed.

What lay beyond was a city by the sea. Perhaps it was only appropriate for there to be a light rain.

Hello again, Brockton Bay.


Universe: Worm. Location: Brockton Bay.
Event: ABB Bombings.



-o-​


The girl with silver hair appeared in a place she did not recognize.

"Whoa… Where am I?"

A young man with dark eyes answered her. No one could say since when he was there.


"Welcome to the theater. Are you here for the show?"

"Theater? No, um, I wanted to poke my head through the portal thingy for a second. I-I just thought those three were interesting, I didn't mean to sneak in, ahaha."

The girl scratched her cheek, right above a faint scar.

The young man did not seem put out by the admission.


"My, you would fit right in, then. The world can wait, don't you think? Stay a while, mister…"

"Ahaha… my name is Eris, but I go by Chris in this form… and I'm actually a girl."



Author's Notes: I figured, the cat didn't deserve what Jaune got.

Although, the cat still got what Jaune got.

.
An artist on Tumblr made cover art for this story on a whim. Unfortunately, I don't have an account there, so in the hope that they read this, I'll ask here.
Jauneglazer, do you mind if I display your work as the cover for this story?

.
Making edits to this tomorrow. If you spy a typo before then, let me know?

Then gonna go write Yakuza Arc for a bit.
 
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