Chapter 31: The Interview Part 1
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Chapter 31: The Interview Part 1
The Mountain, Colorado, United States, Earth, September 7th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"The visitors have arrived, Sir."
Jack O'Neill nodded at Siler. "Thank you, Siler." He sighed and got up. Usually, he'd appreciate any break from paperwork, but today… "Let's go give the commies the tour."
"Russia isn't communist any more, Jack." Daniel had to comment, of course, as they filed out of his office.
"They've still got the same people in uniform. Every one of their generals was in the Red Army," Jack retorted. "And the Chinese are communist."
"Well, that's a matter of debate," Daniel replied. "Some might claim that they are more capitalist than many western countries since their economic reforms took off."
"They're still ruled by the Communist Party," Jack shot back. Who had brutally crushed protesting students not even 10 years ago. Literally crushed in some cases, or so he had heard.
They collected Carter on the way. Teal'c joined them before they reached the elevator.
"And the British are ruled by socialists," Jack said as they stepped inside the cabin.
"Sir?"
"Just telling Daniel why calling our visitors 'commies' is perfectly factual, Carter," he explained.
"It's actually not," Daniel insisted. "And calling the delegation from the United Nations Security Council 'commies' would be a major diplomatic blunder!"
"I'm not going to tell them that to their faces," Jack assured his friend. "But I am permitted to be grumpy about a bunch of strangers coming and taking over."
"Our government agreed with the decision," Daniel said.
"Under protest."
"Actually, they didn't file any protest," Carter said.
"Because that would've been bad for our image." Jack snorted. It had probably been inevitable - not even the United States could defy the entire world. Especially with the Etherians willing to uplift, as Daniel called it, other countries. But that didn't mean that he had to like it.
"Well, that is a consideration," Daniel said. "But the Stargate is supposed to be for the entire world, so… we shouldn't expect to be able to monopolise it."
"Monopolising is a proud capitalist tradition," Jack quipped as they entered Hammond's office.
"Don't make any jokes about communists, Colonel O'Neill," the general told him. "The President himself told me to extend every courtesy to our guests."
"My lips are sealed," Jack replied and mimed zipping them.
Hammond snorted. "I don't like this either, but politics are politics. We can but try to make the best out of this."
"At least it's going to be a military operation," Jack said. "Some people wanted to put us under civilian oversight." You couldn't wage war like that.
Daniel was about to comment, as Jack had known he would, but Siler's voice over the intercom informed them that the delegation had reached their floor.
And there they came. Russian, Chinese, British and French officers. Undoubtedly taking in everything - this was, after all, one of the most important military installations in the United States even if you didn't count the Stargate.
"General Sidorov, General Li, General Haig and General Dubois, welcome to Stargate Command," Hammond greeted them. "This is SG-1, our best team."
"Thank you, General. And I think everyone here knows SG-1." Sidorov smiled. "We've met at the United Nations."
Jack returned the smile with about as much sincerity. Yes, he remembered those briefings. Or interrogations.
"And I think you've met Dr Georgovich already."
The Russian scientist beamed at them. "Yes! Hello! Fancy meeting you here, da? Who would have thought we meet again so soon!"
Just about everyone with half a brain, Jack thought. Too bad that telling Georgovich to drop the act would be undiplomatic. He glanced at Carter - she was smiling. She didn't actually like the Russian, did she?
"So, gentlemen, let me give you a tour so you can get an impression of how we run things here," Hammond said.
"Yes," General Haig replied. "We need to know that in order to determine how to transfer the entire operation to a more suitable location." He looked around. "While this is very secure, I can't see us operating an entire invasion through this installation."
"Or peaceful exploration and diplomacy," Georgovich added. "Bunker makes not good first impression, no?"
The General Sidorov didn't look angry that the scientist spoke up without having been asked a question. That told Jack a lot about the dear doctor's standing in Russia.
"So the decision has been made to move the Stargate?" Hammond asked. He was taking that much better than Jack would have in his place.
"Yes. Although the new location hasn't been finalised yet," General Dubois answered. "The need of the new location to be accessible for bulk transport as well as being secure and easy to defend pose a slight challenge."
"And prestige warring with security. Great honour to host gate, but great embarrassment if gate invaded and need to be blown up," Georgovich said.
"It's a tricky decision indeed," General Haig agreed. "Completely out of our hands, though."
And that was another reason Jack wasn't happy with this. He didn't want to move to some foreign country where he couldn't go out and have a decent American dinner in town. It was petty, but after travelling the Galaxy - and getting shot at - he really liked heading home instead of to some barracks.
But there was nothing he could do about this.
Dulles International Airport, Washington DC, Earth, September 7th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"...and I believe that it is past time to start giving interviews," Julie finished her, well, briefing. Even though she was a civilian. "Some members of the press are already portraying you as 'aloof' and 'distant', and the longer this goes on, the worse it will get. If you wish to improve your public image, you need to start talking to the press."
Adora frowned. They had been busy with negotiations and diplomatic meetings nonstop - even the so-called European Union hadn't actually spoken for their members. Apparently, the military alliance part wasn't included in the Union. But since they regulated trade, they had a say about any agreement being made. Or something - even Glimmer was still a little confused about how this was supposed to work.
"Democracy in action." Catra snorted. "Why is it that the people's opinion only counts when it's making trouble for us?"
"That would be because the media and the public in the United States have certain expectations that politics need to take into account," Julie said. "And in true American fashion, they extend that to everyone else."
"Charming," Glimmer commented. "And once we start giving interviews, we can't really stop until everyone got theirs, right?"
Julie shook her head. "You can stick to the most important ones. A snubbed journalist is one of the worst enemies you can make in the USA - if they have the backing of their employer. Some of them are so petty, they will portray everything you do in the worst light possible in retaliation. But if they don't have the reach to cover the country, they can't really hurt you no matter how hard they will try."
"You mean they aren't doing that already?" Catra asked. "Some of them could've fooled me."
Adora nodded. "Do they really expect us to talk to them before we actually finish our negotiations with the United Nations?"
"In a word, yes," Julie replied. "Some of them - most actually - will understand that you're not American and won't act like our own government. But a few have such huge egos, they think they have more influence on the public than the government and should be treated accordingly. And in some states, they would be correct. Now, some of them won't really change their attitude and will use the interview merely as another source for their criticism. They are too invested in their fanbase. But others can be won over if you handle this right." Julie slowly nodded. "But you will have to prepare thoroughly for this - a blunder could seriously damage your reputation."
Adora perked up. She was good at such preparations! "Oh, we can do that! We'll prepare as if this were a diplomatic mission of utmost importance!"
Glimmer sighed. "Oh, great - it's Princess Prom again."
Adora frowned at her friend. Granted, her preparations hadn't been as helpful as she had hoped, but that didn't mean they had been bad. If she hadn't prepared as extensively as she had, things might have gone worse. And her worst mistake had been that she hadn't accounted for Catra's presence, anyway - and that wasn't a problem any more!
Julie wrinkled her forehead a little. "Princess Prom?"
"The most important ball on Etheria," Bow explained. "All the princesses and their consorts gather at the Princess Prom every ten years. It goes back centuries, to the Age of War, and is used not only to socialise but also to negotiate agreements, alliances and settle disputes."
"Oh, yes," Adora added. "And the list of rules for it is longer than I am tall - as She-Ra."
"But you don't need to know all of them, just the most important ones," Catra said.
"You would think that - you blew up the last one!" Glimmer protested.
"You blew it up?" Julie looked… well, the most surprised Adora had ever seen her in the week since they had started working together.
"Not really," Catra said, making a dismissive gesture with her hand. "It was mostly a distraction. I didn't use decent charges."
"Yes." Entrapta nodded. "Those were microcharges. Scorpia told me about them after I joined the Horde."
"They caused a panic," Glimmer said.
"And they caused Frosta to ally with us," Bow added. "Even after Adora alienated her."
"I was surprised at her age," Adora defended herself.
"And she would have joined the Princess Alliance sooner or later anyway," Catra said. "But others were scared off, and we got our objectives, so I'd say, overall, it was a qualified success." She turned and flashed her fangs at Adora in that way of hers that made Adora feel butterflies in her stomach. "And I got to dance with you!"
"The dance that will live in infamy," Bow said. "Or would, if there were any records."
"Actually, there are," Entrapta said. "I recorded everything for my research into social occasions and interactions."
Adora felt herself blush a little. Entrapta had recorded that dance?
"Oh, great! I need a copy!" Catra beamed. "Did you record how I fooled Adora as well?"
"I think so?"
"You recorded the Princess Prom?" Glimmer blurted out. "But that's against the rules!"
"It is?" Entrapta looked confused. "They said you weren't allowed to use magic to record the events at the ball, but I used a completely different way of recording things!"
"I think you and I both better clear our schedule to prepare for your first interview, " Julie commented.
Adora frowned. The Princess Prom had been an exception, and that had been years ago. Everyone had changed since then. And for the better.
But Julie didn't look as if she'd believe that.
The Mountain, Colorado, United States, Earth, September 7th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"...and this is the central vault where we store the recovered alien technology. While I'm not going to detail the exact security measures, you can see that it is quite secure," Samantha Carter said as she approached the vault and nodded at the two guards there.
"Yes, yes. Very solid door," Dr Georgovich said, nodding. "The walls - reinforced as well, right?"
"Of course," Sam replied. "It wouldn't make sense to have a reinforced door anchored to walls that you can easily breach."
"You would think, but sometimes, mistake happens. I saw vault that had door one metre thick, stainless steel, but the walls? Natural stone. You see, specifications only said thick door, not walls, and workers did follow specifications to the letter. Was very embarrassing for officer in charge when hinges broke out of wall and door almost fell on important visitor." The Russian eyed the door - no, the guards. "Ah, no flinching, they trust door. Good."
Sam narrowed her eyes at the man. "I can't believe someone would make such an obvious mistake." He had to be joking.
"Ah, you never visited Soviet Union, da? If door was your task but not wall, you only did door. Wall was other problem. You did your problem and done."
"Yeah, I can believe that," the Colonel commented.
"Ah, you've visited Soviet Russia, da? No comment or no confirm or deny?" Dr Georgovich beamed at the Colonel.
"Something like that, yeah." The Colonel shrugged. "Anyway, that's the vault."
"So, can we enter? Just for a look - evaluate."
"We do need to take stock, after all," General Haig added.
"As long as you keep your fingers to yourself," the Colonel said.
Sam would have frowned at him - suggesting that their guests might attempt to steal from the vault wasn't very diplomatic - but they were under scrutiny right now.
So she had the guards open the vault and then stepped into the door - she wouldn't let anyone actually enter the vault. Not until and unless they had the necessary clearance.
"Oh! I feel like Dr Jones! You know, movie with Harrison Ford, Han Solo, right?"
"Yeah, we know Indiana Jones," the Colonel said.
This had to be an act. Sam was certain now.
"I have watched Star Wars fourteen times," Teal'c said. "Han Solo is undoubtedly Harrison Ford's best role."
Dr Georgovich blinked. "Fourteen times?"
"It was thirteen times, but I found myself with time on my hand after our return from Etheria," Teal'C replied.
When he had been sidelined by their superiors. Sam clenched her teeth for a moment - she didn't support that decision. Teal'c had earned their trust over and over again.
And seemed to have confused the dear Dr Georgovich - a feat not even the Colonel had managed so far.
"Ah, I see." The scientist blinked. "So… how many alien artefacts are in vault?"
"That's classified," the Colonel told him.
"I thought you were told to cooperate," General Li said.
"Yes. Within limits set by the President himself." The Colonel grinned widely. "You aren't in our chain of command yet, and treating you as if you had the necessary clearance would be a grave breach of regulations."
"Da!" Dr Georgovich smiled. "Very loyal, very obedient, yes! Good soldier follow orders, right?"
"Yeah…" The Colonel narrowed his eyes at the man, but the scientist was already talking to Sam again. "So, here is vault, but where is your lab? How do you work here? I am very curious about working conditions!"
"My lab is a level above this floor," she told him.
"For safety? So not blow up both vault and lab, da?"
"Oh, Carter hasn't blown up anything in ages - it should be pretty safe to enter her lab."
That was too much! "Colonel!" she hissed under her breath.
He made an innocent face.
And Georgovich beamed again. "Ah, joke! I understand. Good joke!"
Sam turned to lead them to her lab, rolling her eyes as soon as she was facing away from their guests. What was with the Colonel? He couldn't really be holding a grudge from the Cold War, could he?
They reached her lab after another short ride in the elevator.
"Oh. Very small. Not much room for pacing - do you not pace? I think best when pacing."
Well, Sam hadn't really expected that their guests would be impressed, but… this was a little rude.
"Think when relocating, get better lab. More spacious. And with bed and shower, in case you work late. Maybe kitchen and fridge, tto. Good idea?"
Sam blinked. That was actually a very good idea. She had lamented the lack of space in her lab a few times in the past. And to be able to sleep in the lab would save time in a crisis…
"Carter! Accepting a bribe is illegal!" The Colonel commented - she must have let her expression betray her thoughts.
"No crime!" Georgovich protested. "But scientists need space to work. No poaching - unless you feel like getting poached, of course!" He beamed at her. "We offer spacious lab and much better coffee!"
He was joking. Probably. But the Colonel was glaring as if this had been a serious attempt to recruit her.
"As things stand, most of Stargate Command will be transferred to the United Nations Stargate Command," General Haig cut in. "But we will add both military and civilian staff. The scope of the operation has to expand, after all, now that we're going to have a proper war."
"'A proper war'?" The Colonel narrowed his eyes at the General. "Sir?"
The British officer didn't seem impressed at all. "Yes. So far, you've conducted the war through special operations. With the Etherians, this will change. We'll be shifting to conventional warfare, with special operations in support of planetary invasions."
"There will be independent operations as before," General Sidorov said in accented English, "under control of the United Nations."
"We will have to hash out with the Etherians how best to move troops and supplies," General Haig went on. "But the Stargate will play an essential part of any invasion, I think."
"You seem pretty confident that you will manage to negotiate an alliance with the Etherians," the Colonel commented.
Sam had to agree - this sounded very optimistic to her.
"Shouldn't we?" General Haig shrugged. "The conditions set by them can and will be easily fulfilled by Her Majesty's Government."
"Indeed," General Dubois agreed with a smug smile, "full equality before the law for every citizen, no matter their sexual orientation, is certainly in line with the founding principles of the république. France is united in this."
The Colonel pressed his lips together instead of answering at once. That wasn't a good sign.
Daniel, though, spoke up: "But the Etherians expect more than lip service. They expect full commitment to ensuring that the laws you pass are enforced."
General Haig was unfazed. "As I said, Her Majesty's Government's stance is that such conditions are easily fulfilled. Inquiries were made, and assurances received that the Etherians are aware that attitudes among some part of the population wouldn't change overnight."
The Colonel glanced at General Sidorov. "Equal rights by authoritarian decree should be a good trick. Especially after killing off the Tsar and his entire family."
The Russian didn't seem to let himself be baited. "That is a matter for politics. Even without an alliance with the Etherians, the Stargate will be under the control of the United Nations, and exploration and diplomatic missions will continue - for the world."
Sam blinked. That sounded like…
"You want to keep us out of the war?" the Colonel blurted out.
"That's a question for the politicians," Sidorov replied. "But in order to wage war, we need an alliance or at least a way to coordinate with the Etherians."
"And with their allies," General Dubois interjected.
"We only know for sure that the Stargate will be under international control," General Li said. "but we remain optimistic that an agreement can be reached - in a war, compromises must be made, after all."
"Good luck getting the magical princesses to compromise," Sam heard the Colonel mutter next to her.
"In any case, we will do science!" Dr Georgovich spoke up again. "And in new, spacious lab!"
That would be a small consolation, in Sam's opinion, if Stargate Command ended up relegated from Earth's premier force facing the Goa'uld to some… guard and support unit for diplomatic missions. She wasn't arrogant, but SG-1 had the most experience in dealing with the Goa'uld. That kind of knowledge shouldn't be dismissed.
And she wanted to keep doing crucial work, a small voice in the back of her mind added. Especially now that she could publish her findings.
Dulles International Airport, Washington DC, Earth, September 8th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"I agree with my colleague," Brown said. "An interview is almost overdue. But you need to prepare extensively for your interview. And you need to pick your interviewer carefully. I would suggest CNN - the channel has a global reach and a good reputation."
Catra suppressed a snort when she saw Adora nod eagerly - she'd already had to keep her lover from spending all night working out increasingly complicated relations between the most prominent journalists without even knowing who would be relevant - or what.
"They're an American channel," Gimmer pointed out. "And one that isn't too popular in the conservative circles, as far as we could tell."
"Yes." Brown nodded. "But you hired me to improve your image with the American public, and picking a news service in the USA will play better with the conservative crowd. Though no matter their views, almost everyone will be watching CNN for your interview."
"No pressure," Bow mumbled with a grin, too low for anyone except for Glimmer, who was sitting very close to him, and Catra to hear.
She chuckled. Adora was fretting already about being watched by billions.
"Won't that be resented by the other countries?" Entrapta asked, tilting her head.
"Not as long as you don't wait too long with giving foreign news services interviews as well," Brown told her. "And your image in most countries in Europe is better than in the USA, according to the latest poll we ran."
"Oh! You've got new data?" Entrapta piped up.
Brown smiled. "I'll send you a summary."
"Thanks!"
"But now for your preparations. I don't know what my colleague told you already, but there's a whole science to presenting your best side on television. Elections were lost for bungling up a TV appearance," Brown went on. "So, I would like to hire a specialist for the visual aspect of that."
They still hadn't hired more public relations consultants from other countries, but this sounded like a good idea. Catra glanced at her lover. Adora was already fretting too much about this as things were. If she had to sit through a few hours worrying over what to wear… "Good idea!" she said.
Bow stared at her. "You want a stylist working on you?"
Catra returned his stare with a frown. Why would that surprise him? "Why do you think I wouldn't want that?" Granted, it was mostly for Adora, but it wouldn't hurt her either.
"You're always wearing the same clothes!" he blurted out.
So was he. "Did you forget Princess Prom?" she shot back.
He blinked, then nodded. "Ah."
She rolled her eyes. She was wearing her old uniform so she had a reminder of… things she wanted but couldn't allow herself to forget. Not because she thought it was the best outfit ever. And she wouldn't beg for a new outfit.
"It's more than styling, actually," Brown spoke up. "It's also about how to sit, move and talk, treat the camera, body language in general and, crucially, what pitfalls to avoid.
"Pitfalls?" Adora tensed.
"Verbal pitfalls - statements that might be misconstrued, phrases and their meaning in the United States, and such things. How you say something is as important, sometimes more important, than what you say." Brown spread his hands. "It's a science."
Entrapta perked up. "Fascinating! Can we do experiments?"
Brown's smile slipped a tiny bit. "I think rehearsals would be mandatory, but I wouldn't experiment with public relations. Failures will have consequences."
"Oh." Entrapta blinked. "So, if we wanted to test a hypothesis, we would need to run an experiment without the test subjects being aware of our involvement. Although that might influence the results…"
Catra drew a breath through her clenched teeth. "Maybe wait with running social experiments until you have a better baseline?"
"You mean stick to passively gathering data?" Entrapta cocked her head. "I guess that would make sense. You need data to prepare a proper experiment, after all." She nodded with a smile. "I bet we'll get a lot of data from this!"
Brown wasn't the only wincing, Catra noted. But when it came to wrangling Entrapta, this was a good result.
She was a great friend and a very nice person, but she could scare you without meaning to.
The Mountain, Colorado, United States, Earth, September 7th, 1998 (Earth Time)
Jack O'Neill was thoroughly sick of Dr Iwan the Terrible Comedian. His - absolutely fake! - accent grated on Jack's nerves, his constant smiling made Jack feel like he was about to be ambushed, and his subtle-as-a-brick-to-the-face attempts to poach Carter begged for some good old Cold War-style retaliation.
"...oh, what ingenious solution! Very Impressive, Dr Carter - I mean, Captain Carter. No wonder you are head scientist here."
"Thank you, Doctor."
"Call me Iwan, please - we are colleagues of sorts, yes?"
No, you are rivals. Rivals from rival powers, Jack thought.
But Carter didn't rebuke the man - she was just too polite to do the right thing. "Call me Samantha, then. Or Sam."
"Thank you! Which do you prefer?" The Russian spy was beaming again.
"I don't have any preference."
That was a lie. Jack was sure Carter had a preference.
"Samantha then. It is a beautiful name."
"Thank you."
"And speaking of names," Daniel cut in, finally making himself useful, "I noticed on your name tag that your name doesn't use the usual Russian spelling of 'Ivan'. Do you have German ancestry, perhaps?"
Asking a Russian if he was German? Jack winced.
But the man smiled at Daniel. "Ah, common assumption, yes, but mistaken. It is actually Welsh name."
Jack blinked. "Welsh?" he asked before he could help himself.
"Yes. Grandmother was from Cardiff."
So he was both British and Russian - that explained why he was doubly annoying.
But the man was still talking. "She was nurse in Spanish Civil War, fighting fascists, and met my grandfather, who was volunteer from Russia. Commissar, actually, but we don't talk about that."
Then why are you mentioning it? Jack thought. But both Daniel and Carter were listening attentively.
"So, they met, fell in love, and when fascists won despite best efforts, she went back with him to Russia. She was killed in Great Patriotic War but already had my father, also named Iwan. Family tradition of naming first son Iwan."
"Ah." Daniel looked torn between his curiosity and empathy. And Carter looked…
…entirely too sympathetic for Jack's taste. The man's grandfather had been a political commissar, for crying out loud! If they hadn't killed more republicans than fascists in Spain, it hadn't been for lack of effort!
"That is why I have been learning English. Too bad grandmother died before teaching father. I also hope to learn Welsh - perhaps after retirement."
And there went Daniel. "Oh, it's a fascinating language!"
"Da! But need to improve English more, to work together at Stargate! Fortunately, science is universal language, right? Especially mathematics."
Carter smiled far too kindly at the man.
"Do not worry, O'Neill," Teal'c said, sotto voce, as Carter showed Dr Iwan-the-Terrible the main gate control room, "Captain Carter is an honourable soldier and will not leave your service in the middle of a war."
"Thanks, Teal'c," Jack replied. "But I don't think Carter would leave the team even if we weren't at war with the Goa'uld." At least he hoped so.
"Indeed." Teal'c nodded sagely, but there was a hint of a grin - or smirk - on his face.
Jack stared at him, but Teal'c had put up his usual inscrutable expression again.
Dulles International Airport, Washington DC, Earth, September 10th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"...so, let the interviewer speak. Don't interrupt them - even if you think you know what they are asking. And don't lecture people. The public reacts negatively to presumed arrogance. Also, watch your body language like - exactly like that! Don't do that on TV!" Melissa Barnaby, Brown's 'specialist', pointed at Catra, who had her arms crossed over her chest and was frowning at her.
Adora suppressed a sigh. The woman certainly seemed to know her business - her advice about Earth fashion sounded very, well, sound. But Catra didn't like to be told, well, that pretty much everything she did was wrong.
"I thought we also should be authentic," Catra snapped. "And not act as if we were all sunshine and roses even when we're talking to idiots."
"You aren't going to talk to idiots," Melissa retorted. "Not unless you pick the wrong channel to give an interview."
"So, make it 'even when we're faced with lies and questions from idiots they quote' then," Catra said with a sneer.
"Even then, you can't lose your temper - that would leave a bad impression. You want to appear friendly. Firm in your stances but polite and respectful. No one likes a gloating jerk."
"They seem to be very popular in media," Glimmer pointed out.
"Jerks are popular in a certain crowd - if they are rude to people whom that crowd doesn't like. So, yes, being rude and dismissive about conservatives will be popular in more liberal circles, but won't make you more popular amongst conservatives," Melissa replied. "And that's your goal, isn't it?"
Glimmer's expression mirrored Catra's.
Bow cleared his head. "But we shouldn't put on an act," he said. "We don't want to lie to people to get them to like us."
Adora nodded emphatically. "We want to be honest."
"Besides, I'm already being nicer than usual if I don't scratch an idiot," Catra added with a scoff, flexing her claws.
Melissa blinked.
Adora quickly said. "Catra's kidding." She added a glare at her lover to ensure that this was true.
Catra nodded with a pout. "Unless they attack us, I won't touch them."
"You won't be attacked in a studio," Melissa told her.
"I wouldn't be so sure," Catra retorted. "I've organised an attack at a ball."
Melissa blinked.
"Stop sounding so proud about it!" Glimmer snapped.
Adora sighed.
"What's wrong with my uniform?" Adora asked a short explanation and a quick assessment of her wardrobe later. "It's comfortable and sturdy." And it held a lot of memories.
"But it's rather plain," Melissa said. "The cuts in the sleeves are a nice style element, but the shoulders are a bit over the top. Overall, it lacks a certain something."
"Something what?" Adora frowned.
"Something that says 'I'm an alien magical princess and I'm here to help you' without being too in your face about it. No tiara, but…" Melissa took a step to the side and eyed Adora's hair. "...maybe a change of style there as well."
Adora resisted the urge to put a hand on top of her hairdo. She liked her hairstyle just as it was!
Catra snorted, and Adora glared at her - her lover's hairstyle had been deemed 'passable' already.
"What about a bare midriff?" Bow asked. Melissa narrowed her eyes at him, and he recoiled.
"That would not go over well at all with your target crowd."
"Are you sure?" Entrapta chimed in. "A lot of your media popular with conservatives feature such outfits rather prominently." She showed a picture of a woman in shorts and a knotted shirt in front of an orange car on her tablet. "See?"
Melissa sighed. "You don't want to be likened to such characters, trust me - that would sabotage your image."
"Ah." Entrapta frowned. "Is this an example of them liking something but pretending not to like it because it goes against a dominant part of their culture?"
"No, that's an example of conservative sexism. If you appear like that on television, they won't take you seriously at all," Melissa said.
Bow looked taken aback. "They won't?" He stared at his midriff.
Melissa sighed again. "It's different in your case."
"Homophobes! I got data about them!" Entrapta smiled. "Most of them will be attracted to you, Bow, but they will try to deny and suppress their feelings."
Bow grimaced. "I'm not sure if I should be flattered or alarmed."
"Alarmed. Definitely alarmed," Melissa said. "But we can work with your style - but it's not for everyone else."
"Aw! I bet Adora would rock that look!" Catra crowed.
Adora felt herself blush in response. She cleared her throat. "Anyway, we have been seen on television already. Shouldn't we stick with our, ah, image?" The Earth leaders basically always wore the same suits anyway, right?
Melissa nodded. "But a few touch-ups would greatly improve your image. You might even set a new trend. Or rather, you'll boost an already starting trend."
"Well, Glimmer, you can put your royal coronation outfit on," Adora suggested.
"That's just my cape," Glimmer replied.
"It still looks nice and, uh, regal?" Adora tilted her head with a forced smile.
"We should stick you into your prom dress," Catra said.
"But it's not a ball," Entrapta protested. "Or is it? I'm still working on gathering data on Earth social conventions."
Melissa sighed once more.
Pentagon, Washington DC, Earth, September 11th, 1998 (Earth Time)
Samantha Carter wished she had a spaceship. Or a working ring transporter. It would make the trips to Washington to brief generals and politicians more bearable. Since there hasn't been a C-37 available today, and commercial flights had been deemed not safe enough, she'd had to hitch a ride on a C-130 today. That hadn't been comfortable enough to work efficiently and had taken much longer than a spaceship would have. And all for a briefing she could have done remotely through a video conference, anyway - and she had refuted the Pentagon's security concerns thoroughly in her latest report, which apparently had been ignored.
'Ours is not to reason why', as Daniel would quote if she complained to him. And that was why she was here for what the Colonel would call 'a complete waste of time'. At least she had been able to catch up on paperwork on the flight.
"No, Sir, I don't think handing the spare Stargate over to the United Nations is a workable solution," she repeated herself. They had gone over this already, back when it had first been proposed as a response to the demands from the Security Council. There was a reason everyone was busy planning to make the takeover of Stargate Command go through with the least amount of friction.
"I wasn't talking about diplomatic issues, Captain." The Army general who had asked her about it frowned at her. "We called you here for technical advice."
"And I am talking about the technical aspects," she retorted. "As my report about this stated, running two Stargates in one location - on one planet - creates interference since both use the same gate address." A report she had written shortly after discovering the second gate through this very effect, which had ended with herself and the Colonel getting stuck in an ice cave in the Antarctic. "We would end up with multiple misconnections - and possibly fatalities from our defences."
"Thank you. We didn't call you here to discuss that, anyway," the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff said, shutting up the obnoxious general with a glare. "There is talk about relocating the Stargate to a more accessible location, either in Canada or Australia."
Ah. She nodded - Iwan had told them about that. Russia's proposal to use Siberia had apparently been rejected despite, as he claimed, their great experience with 'building entire research centres and bases in the middle of nowhere so expected accidents do not hurt civilians.'
"So, we would like your assessment of the proposed locations from a technical point of view," the Chairman went on.
Did they expect her to give an assessment of the logistical issues without any time to study said locations in detail? Sam almost shook her head. "As long as the power requirements for the operation of the Stargate are met and there is enough space to house the equipment and staff, any location will be suitable for running Stargate Command, as far as the technical aspect is concerned," she said. "Unlike with satellite launches, location provides no inherent benefit or drawback." And with alien technology, the advantage of being closer to the equator for launches would vanish as well.
"That would require a large power plant," another general said. "A very large power plant."
"Yes, Sir."
"Are there alternatives to such a plant?" he asked.
"The DHD the Russians recovered could fuel the Stargate independently, but its capacity is limited," she said. "Enough for the average use of a Stargate, but not enough to power it for constant high-volume traffic. Its recovery rate is not high enough, and we haven't yet managed to duplicate its power generation method." Not for lack of trying on her part.
"Ah."
"Etherian technology would offer compact alternatives - compact compared to a conventional power plant, not a DHD," she went on.
She noted that several Generals frowned or even winced. The Chairman nodded, though. "That would require their support."
"Yes, Sir." She nodded emphatically. If any of the people present thought the United States could accomplish this without outside help, they hadn't read her reports at all.
"Wonderful," the Army general who had asked her about the second Stargate muttered. "More leverage for them."
"Speaking of the Etherians," an admiral spoke up, "did they voice any preference or resistance to specific locations or climates?"
Catra didn't like the ocean, but Sam didn't think that was relevant here. "Based on their references to events during their war, I think they would prefer to avoid arctic climates as well as deserts."
"We can plant our Stargate where we damn well want," the first general muttered again.
"You mean where the Security Council wants it," the admiral corrected him. "Canada would be much closer to us - and to Europe. Wherever this gate is installed will become a hub for the entire planet. It needs a good harbour - we'll want to base a fleet there to protect the shipping."
"A space fleet," another general - Air Force - added with a smirk.
The admiral frowned at him. "I do not think cargo ships will be replaced by spaceships any time soon, at least on Earth. And by the time space cargo ships are common, the Navy will have adapted."
"What?" The Air Force general glared at him. "Space is clearly the domain of the Air Force!"
"Only as long as it was about satellite reconnaissance. If anyone has the experience to run a ship, it's the Navy. You can't run a ship, or a spaceship, as if it were a plane!"
"Oh, yeah? Just watch us!"
Sam refrained from rolling her eyes or otherwise showing her reaction. They still hadn't made much progress forming an alliance with the Etherians, and the Navy and the Air Force brass were already squabbling over who got to run a hypothetical fleet in space?
They needed to get their priorities straight!
Besides, it was clear that the Air Force had the most experience here.
The Mountain, Colorado, United States, Earth, September 7th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"The visitors have arrived, Sir."
Jack O'Neill nodded at Siler. "Thank you, Siler." He sighed and got up. Usually, he'd appreciate any break from paperwork, but today… "Let's go give the commies the tour."
"Russia isn't communist any more, Jack." Daniel had to comment, of course, as they filed out of his office.
"They've still got the same people in uniform. Every one of their generals was in the Red Army," Jack retorted. "And the Chinese are communist."
"Well, that's a matter of debate," Daniel replied. "Some might claim that they are more capitalist than many western countries since their economic reforms took off."
"They're still ruled by the Communist Party," Jack shot back. Who had brutally crushed protesting students not even 10 years ago. Literally crushed in some cases, or so he had heard.
They collected Carter on the way. Teal'c joined them before they reached the elevator.
"And the British are ruled by socialists," Jack said as they stepped inside the cabin.
"Sir?"
"Just telling Daniel why calling our visitors 'commies' is perfectly factual, Carter," he explained.
"It's actually not," Daniel insisted. "And calling the delegation from the United Nations Security Council 'commies' would be a major diplomatic blunder!"
"I'm not going to tell them that to their faces," Jack assured his friend. "But I am permitted to be grumpy about a bunch of strangers coming and taking over."
"Our government agreed with the decision," Daniel said.
"Under protest."
"Actually, they didn't file any protest," Carter said.
"Because that would've been bad for our image." Jack snorted. It had probably been inevitable - not even the United States could defy the entire world. Especially with the Etherians willing to uplift, as Daniel called it, other countries. But that didn't mean that he had to like it.
"Well, that is a consideration," Daniel said. "But the Stargate is supposed to be for the entire world, so… we shouldn't expect to be able to monopolise it."
"Monopolising is a proud capitalist tradition," Jack quipped as they entered Hammond's office.
"Don't make any jokes about communists, Colonel O'Neill," the general told him. "The President himself told me to extend every courtesy to our guests."
"My lips are sealed," Jack replied and mimed zipping them.
Hammond snorted. "I don't like this either, but politics are politics. We can but try to make the best out of this."
"At least it's going to be a military operation," Jack said. "Some people wanted to put us under civilian oversight." You couldn't wage war like that.
Daniel was about to comment, as Jack had known he would, but Siler's voice over the intercom informed them that the delegation had reached their floor.
And there they came. Russian, Chinese, British and French officers. Undoubtedly taking in everything - this was, after all, one of the most important military installations in the United States even if you didn't count the Stargate.
"General Sidorov, General Li, General Haig and General Dubois, welcome to Stargate Command," Hammond greeted them. "This is SG-1, our best team."
"Thank you, General. And I think everyone here knows SG-1." Sidorov smiled. "We've met at the United Nations."
Jack returned the smile with about as much sincerity. Yes, he remembered those briefings. Or interrogations.
"And I think you've met Dr Georgovich already."
The Russian scientist beamed at them. "Yes! Hello! Fancy meeting you here, da? Who would have thought we meet again so soon!"
Just about everyone with half a brain, Jack thought. Too bad that telling Georgovich to drop the act would be undiplomatic. He glanced at Carter - she was smiling. She didn't actually like the Russian, did she?
"So, gentlemen, let me give you a tour so you can get an impression of how we run things here," Hammond said.
"Yes," General Haig replied. "We need to know that in order to determine how to transfer the entire operation to a more suitable location." He looked around. "While this is very secure, I can't see us operating an entire invasion through this installation."
"Or peaceful exploration and diplomacy," Georgovich added. "Bunker makes not good first impression, no?"
The General Sidorov didn't look angry that the scientist spoke up without having been asked a question. That told Jack a lot about the dear doctor's standing in Russia.
"So the decision has been made to move the Stargate?" Hammond asked. He was taking that much better than Jack would have in his place.
"Yes. Although the new location hasn't been finalised yet," General Dubois answered. "The need of the new location to be accessible for bulk transport as well as being secure and easy to defend pose a slight challenge."
"And prestige warring with security. Great honour to host gate, but great embarrassment if gate invaded and need to be blown up," Georgovich said.
"It's a tricky decision indeed," General Haig agreed. "Completely out of our hands, though."
And that was another reason Jack wasn't happy with this. He didn't want to move to some foreign country where he couldn't go out and have a decent American dinner in town. It was petty, but after travelling the Galaxy - and getting shot at - he really liked heading home instead of to some barracks.
But there was nothing he could do about this.
*****
Dulles International Airport, Washington DC, Earth, September 7th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"...and I believe that it is past time to start giving interviews," Julie finished her, well, briefing. Even though she was a civilian. "Some members of the press are already portraying you as 'aloof' and 'distant', and the longer this goes on, the worse it will get. If you wish to improve your public image, you need to start talking to the press."
Adora frowned. They had been busy with negotiations and diplomatic meetings nonstop - even the so-called European Union hadn't actually spoken for their members. Apparently, the military alliance part wasn't included in the Union. But since they regulated trade, they had a say about any agreement being made. Or something - even Glimmer was still a little confused about how this was supposed to work.
"Democracy in action." Catra snorted. "Why is it that the people's opinion only counts when it's making trouble for us?"
"That would be because the media and the public in the United States have certain expectations that politics need to take into account," Julie said. "And in true American fashion, they extend that to everyone else."
"Charming," Glimmer commented. "And once we start giving interviews, we can't really stop until everyone got theirs, right?"
Julie shook her head. "You can stick to the most important ones. A snubbed journalist is one of the worst enemies you can make in the USA - if they have the backing of their employer. Some of them are so petty, they will portray everything you do in the worst light possible in retaliation. But if they don't have the reach to cover the country, they can't really hurt you no matter how hard they will try."
"You mean they aren't doing that already?" Catra asked. "Some of them could've fooled me."
Adora nodded. "Do they really expect us to talk to them before we actually finish our negotiations with the United Nations?"
"In a word, yes," Julie replied. "Some of them - most actually - will understand that you're not American and won't act like our own government. But a few have such huge egos, they think they have more influence on the public than the government and should be treated accordingly. And in some states, they would be correct. Now, some of them won't really change their attitude and will use the interview merely as another source for their criticism. They are too invested in their fanbase. But others can be won over if you handle this right." Julie slowly nodded. "But you will have to prepare thoroughly for this - a blunder could seriously damage your reputation."
Adora perked up. She was good at such preparations! "Oh, we can do that! We'll prepare as if this were a diplomatic mission of utmost importance!"
Glimmer sighed. "Oh, great - it's Princess Prom again."
Adora frowned at her friend. Granted, her preparations hadn't been as helpful as she had hoped, but that didn't mean they had been bad. If she hadn't prepared as extensively as she had, things might have gone worse. And her worst mistake had been that she hadn't accounted for Catra's presence, anyway - and that wasn't a problem any more!
Julie wrinkled her forehead a little. "Princess Prom?"
"The most important ball on Etheria," Bow explained. "All the princesses and their consorts gather at the Princess Prom every ten years. It goes back centuries, to the Age of War, and is used not only to socialise but also to negotiate agreements, alliances and settle disputes."
"Oh, yes," Adora added. "And the list of rules for it is longer than I am tall - as She-Ra."
"But you don't need to know all of them, just the most important ones," Catra said.
"You would think that - you blew up the last one!" Glimmer protested.
"You blew it up?" Julie looked… well, the most surprised Adora had ever seen her in the week since they had started working together.
"Not really," Catra said, making a dismissive gesture with her hand. "It was mostly a distraction. I didn't use decent charges."
"Yes." Entrapta nodded. "Those were microcharges. Scorpia told me about them after I joined the Horde."
"They caused a panic," Glimmer said.
"And they caused Frosta to ally with us," Bow added. "Even after Adora alienated her."
"I was surprised at her age," Adora defended herself.
"And she would have joined the Princess Alliance sooner or later anyway," Catra said. "But others were scared off, and we got our objectives, so I'd say, overall, it was a qualified success." She turned and flashed her fangs at Adora in that way of hers that made Adora feel butterflies in her stomach. "And I got to dance with you!"
"The dance that will live in infamy," Bow said. "Or would, if there were any records."
"Actually, there are," Entrapta said. "I recorded everything for my research into social occasions and interactions."
Adora felt herself blush a little. Entrapta had recorded that dance?
"Oh, great! I need a copy!" Catra beamed. "Did you record how I fooled Adora as well?"
"I think so?"
"You recorded the Princess Prom?" Glimmer blurted out. "But that's against the rules!"
"It is?" Entrapta looked confused. "They said you weren't allowed to use magic to record the events at the ball, but I used a completely different way of recording things!"
"I think you and I both better clear our schedule to prepare for your first interview, " Julie commented.
Adora frowned. The Princess Prom had been an exception, and that had been years ago. Everyone had changed since then. And for the better.
But Julie didn't look as if she'd believe that.
*****
The Mountain, Colorado, United States, Earth, September 7th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"...and this is the central vault where we store the recovered alien technology. While I'm not going to detail the exact security measures, you can see that it is quite secure," Samantha Carter said as she approached the vault and nodded at the two guards there.
"Yes, yes. Very solid door," Dr Georgovich said, nodding. "The walls - reinforced as well, right?"
"Of course," Sam replied. "It wouldn't make sense to have a reinforced door anchored to walls that you can easily breach."
"You would think, but sometimes, mistake happens. I saw vault that had door one metre thick, stainless steel, but the walls? Natural stone. You see, specifications only said thick door, not walls, and workers did follow specifications to the letter. Was very embarrassing for officer in charge when hinges broke out of wall and door almost fell on important visitor." The Russian eyed the door - no, the guards. "Ah, no flinching, they trust door. Good."
Sam narrowed her eyes at the man. "I can't believe someone would make such an obvious mistake." He had to be joking.
"Ah, you never visited Soviet Union, da? If door was your task but not wall, you only did door. Wall was other problem. You did your problem and done."
"Yeah, I can believe that," the Colonel commented.
"Ah, you've visited Soviet Russia, da? No comment or no confirm or deny?" Dr Georgovich beamed at the Colonel.
"Something like that, yeah." The Colonel shrugged. "Anyway, that's the vault."
"So, can we enter? Just for a look - evaluate."
"We do need to take stock, after all," General Haig added.
"As long as you keep your fingers to yourself," the Colonel said.
Sam would have frowned at him - suggesting that their guests might attempt to steal from the vault wasn't very diplomatic - but they were under scrutiny right now.
So she had the guards open the vault and then stepped into the door - she wouldn't let anyone actually enter the vault. Not until and unless they had the necessary clearance.
"Oh! I feel like Dr Jones! You know, movie with Harrison Ford, Han Solo, right?"
"Yeah, we know Indiana Jones," the Colonel said.
This had to be an act. Sam was certain now.
"I have watched Star Wars fourteen times," Teal'c said. "Han Solo is undoubtedly Harrison Ford's best role."
Dr Georgovich blinked. "Fourteen times?"
"It was thirteen times, but I found myself with time on my hand after our return from Etheria," Teal'C replied.
When he had been sidelined by their superiors. Sam clenched her teeth for a moment - she didn't support that decision. Teal'c had earned their trust over and over again.
And seemed to have confused the dear Dr Georgovich - a feat not even the Colonel had managed so far.
"Ah, I see." The scientist blinked. "So… how many alien artefacts are in vault?"
"That's classified," the Colonel told him.
"I thought you were told to cooperate," General Li said.
"Yes. Within limits set by the President himself." The Colonel grinned widely. "You aren't in our chain of command yet, and treating you as if you had the necessary clearance would be a grave breach of regulations."
"Da!" Dr Georgovich smiled. "Very loyal, very obedient, yes! Good soldier follow orders, right?"
"Yeah…" The Colonel narrowed his eyes at the man, but the scientist was already talking to Sam again. "So, here is vault, but where is your lab? How do you work here? I am very curious about working conditions!"
"My lab is a level above this floor," she told him.
"For safety? So not blow up both vault and lab, da?"
"Oh, Carter hasn't blown up anything in ages - it should be pretty safe to enter her lab."
That was too much! "Colonel!" she hissed under her breath.
He made an innocent face.
And Georgovich beamed again. "Ah, joke! I understand. Good joke!"
Sam turned to lead them to her lab, rolling her eyes as soon as she was facing away from their guests. What was with the Colonel? He couldn't really be holding a grudge from the Cold War, could he?
They reached her lab after another short ride in the elevator.
"Oh. Very small. Not much room for pacing - do you not pace? I think best when pacing."
Well, Sam hadn't really expected that their guests would be impressed, but… this was a little rude.
"Think when relocating, get better lab. More spacious. And with bed and shower, in case you work late. Maybe kitchen and fridge, tto. Good idea?"
Sam blinked. That was actually a very good idea. She had lamented the lack of space in her lab a few times in the past. And to be able to sleep in the lab would save time in a crisis…
"Carter! Accepting a bribe is illegal!" The Colonel commented - she must have let her expression betray her thoughts.
"No crime!" Georgovich protested. "But scientists need space to work. No poaching - unless you feel like getting poached, of course!" He beamed at her. "We offer spacious lab and much better coffee!"
He was joking. Probably. But the Colonel was glaring as if this had been a serious attempt to recruit her.
"As things stand, most of Stargate Command will be transferred to the United Nations Stargate Command," General Haig cut in. "But we will add both military and civilian staff. The scope of the operation has to expand, after all, now that we're going to have a proper war."
"'A proper war'?" The Colonel narrowed his eyes at the General. "Sir?"
The British officer didn't seem impressed at all. "Yes. So far, you've conducted the war through special operations. With the Etherians, this will change. We'll be shifting to conventional warfare, with special operations in support of planetary invasions."
"There will be independent operations as before," General Sidorov said in accented English, "under control of the United Nations."
"We will have to hash out with the Etherians how best to move troops and supplies," General Haig went on. "But the Stargate will play an essential part of any invasion, I think."
"You seem pretty confident that you will manage to negotiate an alliance with the Etherians," the Colonel commented.
Sam had to agree - this sounded very optimistic to her.
"Shouldn't we?" General Haig shrugged. "The conditions set by them can and will be easily fulfilled by Her Majesty's Government."
"Indeed," General Dubois agreed with a smug smile, "full equality before the law for every citizen, no matter their sexual orientation, is certainly in line with the founding principles of the république. France is united in this."
The Colonel pressed his lips together instead of answering at once. That wasn't a good sign.
Daniel, though, spoke up: "But the Etherians expect more than lip service. They expect full commitment to ensuring that the laws you pass are enforced."
General Haig was unfazed. "As I said, Her Majesty's Government's stance is that such conditions are easily fulfilled. Inquiries were made, and assurances received that the Etherians are aware that attitudes among some part of the population wouldn't change overnight."
The Colonel glanced at General Sidorov. "Equal rights by authoritarian decree should be a good trick. Especially after killing off the Tsar and his entire family."
The Russian didn't seem to let himself be baited. "That is a matter for politics. Even without an alliance with the Etherians, the Stargate will be under the control of the United Nations, and exploration and diplomatic missions will continue - for the world."
Sam blinked. That sounded like…
"You want to keep us out of the war?" the Colonel blurted out.
"That's a question for the politicians," Sidorov replied. "But in order to wage war, we need an alliance or at least a way to coordinate with the Etherians."
"And with their allies," General Dubois interjected.
"We only know for sure that the Stargate will be under international control," General Li said. "but we remain optimistic that an agreement can be reached - in a war, compromises must be made, after all."
"Good luck getting the magical princesses to compromise," Sam heard the Colonel mutter next to her.
"In any case, we will do science!" Dr Georgovich spoke up again. "And in new, spacious lab!"
That would be a small consolation, in Sam's opinion, if Stargate Command ended up relegated from Earth's premier force facing the Goa'uld to some… guard and support unit for diplomatic missions. She wasn't arrogant, but SG-1 had the most experience in dealing with the Goa'uld. That kind of knowledge shouldn't be dismissed.
And she wanted to keep doing crucial work, a small voice in the back of her mind added. Especially now that she could publish her findings.
*****
Dulles International Airport, Washington DC, Earth, September 8th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"I agree with my colleague," Brown said. "An interview is almost overdue. But you need to prepare extensively for your interview. And you need to pick your interviewer carefully. I would suggest CNN - the channel has a global reach and a good reputation."
Catra suppressed a snort when she saw Adora nod eagerly - she'd already had to keep her lover from spending all night working out increasingly complicated relations between the most prominent journalists without even knowing who would be relevant - or what.
"They're an American channel," Gimmer pointed out. "And one that isn't too popular in the conservative circles, as far as we could tell."
"Yes." Brown nodded. "But you hired me to improve your image with the American public, and picking a news service in the USA will play better with the conservative crowd. Though no matter their views, almost everyone will be watching CNN for your interview."
"No pressure," Bow mumbled with a grin, too low for anyone except for Glimmer, who was sitting very close to him, and Catra to hear.
She chuckled. Adora was fretting already about being watched by billions.
"Won't that be resented by the other countries?" Entrapta asked, tilting her head.
"Not as long as you don't wait too long with giving foreign news services interviews as well," Brown told her. "And your image in most countries in Europe is better than in the USA, according to the latest poll we ran."
"Oh! You've got new data?" Entrapta piped up.
Brown smiled. "I'll send you a summary."
"Thanks!"
"But now for your preparations. I don't know what my colleague told you already, but there's a whole science to presenting your best side on television. Elections were lost for bungling up a TV appearance," Brown went on. "So, I would like to hire a specialist for the visual aspect of that."
They still hadn't hired more public relations consultants from other countries, but this sounded like a good idea. Catra glanced at her lover. Adora was already fretting too much about this as things were. If she had to sit through a few hours worrying over what to wear… "Good idea!" she said.
Bow stared at her. "You want a stylist working on you?"
Catra returned his stare with a frown. Why would that surprise him? "Why do you think I wouldn't want that?" Granted, it was mostly for Adora, but it wouldn't hurt her either.
"You're always wearing the same clothes!" he blurted out.
So was he. "Did you forget Princess Prom?" she shot back.
He blinked, then nodded. "Ah."
She rolled her eyes. She was wearing her old uniform so she had a reminder of… things she wanted but couldn't allow herself to forget. Not because she thought it was the best outfit ever. And she wouldn't beg for a new outfit.
"It's more than styling, actually," Brown spoke up. "It's also about how to sit, move and talk, treat the camera, body language in general and, crucially, what pitfalls to avoid.
"Pitfalls?" Adora tensed.
"Verbal pitfalls - statements that might be misconstrued, phrases and their meaning in the United States, and such things. How you say something is as important, sometimes more important, than what you say." Brown spread his hands. "It's a science."
Entrapta perked up. "Fascinating! Can we do experiments?"
Brown's smile slipped a tiny bit. "I think rehearsals would be mandatory, but I wouldn't experiment with public relations. Failures will have consequences."
"Oh." Entrapta blinked. "So, if we wanted to test a hypothesis, we would need to run an experiment without the test subjects being aware of our involvement. Although that might influence the results…"
Catra drew a breath through her clenched teeth. "Maybe wait with running social experiments until you have a better baseline?"
"You mean stick to passively gathering data?" Entrapta cocked her head. "I guess that would make sense. You need data to prepare a proper experiment, after all." She nodded with a smile. "I bet we'll get a lot of data from this!"
Brown wasn't the only wincing, Catra noted. But when it came to wrangling Entrapta, this was a good result.
She was a great friend and a very nice person, but she could scare you without meaning to.
*****
The Mountain, Colorado, United States, Earth, September 7th, 1998 (Earth Time)
Jack O'Neill was thoroughly sick of Dr Iwan the Terrible Comedian. His - absolutely fake! - accent grated on Jack's nerves, his constant smiling made Jack feel like he was about to be ambushed, and his subtle-as-a-brick-to-the-face attempts to poach Carter begged for some good old Cold War-style retaliation.
"...oh, what ingenious solution! Very Impressive, Dr Carter - I mean, Captain Carter. No wonder you are head scientist here."
"Thank you, Doctor."
"Call me Iwan, please - we are colleagues of sorts, yes?"
No, you are rivals. Rivals from rival powers, Jack thought.
But Carter didn't rebuke the man - she was just too polite to do the right thing. "Call me Samantha, then. Or Sam."
"Thank you! Which do you prefer?" The Russian spy was beaming again.
"I don't have any preference."
That was a lie. Jack was sure Carter had a preference.
"Samantha then. It is a beautiful name."
"Thank you."
"And speaking of names," Daniel cut in, finally making himself useful, "I noticed on your name tag that your name doesn't use the usual Russian spelling of 'Ivan'. Do you have German ancestry, perhaps?"
Asking a Russian if he was German? Jack winced.
But the man smiled at Daniel. "Ah, common assumption, yes, but mistaken. It is actually Welsh name."
Jack blinked. "Welsh?" he asked before he could help himself.
"Yes. Grandmother was from Cardiff."
So he was both British and Russian - that explained why he was doubly annoying.
But the man was still talking. "She was nurse in Spanish Civil War, fighting fascists, and met my grandfather, who was volunteer from Russia. Commissar, actually, but we don't talk about that."
Then why are you mentioning it? Jack thought. But both Daniel and Carter were listening attentively.
"So, they met, fell in love, and when fascists won despite best efforts, she went back with him to Russia. She was killed in Great Patriotic War but already had my father, also named Iwan. Family tradition of naming first son Iwan."
"Ah." Daniel looked torn between his curiosity and empathy. And Carter looked…
…entirely too sympathetic for Jack's taste. The man's grandfather had been a political commissar, for crying out loud! If they hadn't killed more republicans than fascists in Spain, it hadn't been for lack of effort!
"That is why I have been learning English. Too bad grandmother died before teaching father. I also hope to learn Welsh - perhaps after retirement."
And there went Daniel. "Oh, it's a fascinating language!"
"Da! But need to improve English more, to work together at Stargate! Fortunately, science is universal language, right? Especially mathematics."
Carter smiled far too kindly at the man.
"Do not worry, O'Neill," Teal'c said, sotto voce, as Carter showed Dr Iwan-the-Terrible the main gate control room, "Captain Carter is an honourable soldier and will not leave your service in the middle of a war."
"Thanks, Teal'c," Jack replied. "But I don't think Carter would leave the team even if we weren't at war with the Goa'uld." At least he hoped so.
"Indeed." Teal'c nodded sagely, but there was a hint of a grin - or smirk - on his face.
Jack stared at him, but Teal'c had put up his usual inscrutable expression again.
*****
Dulles International Airport, Washington DC, Earth, September 10th, 1998 (Earth Time)
"...so, let the interviewer speak. Don't interrupt them - even if you think you know what they are asking. And don't lecture people. The public reacts negatively to presumed arrogance. Also, watch your body language like - exactly like that! Don't do that on TV!" Melissa Barnaby, Brown's 'specialist', pointed at Catra, who had her arms crossed over her chest and was frowning at her.
Adora suppressed a sigh. The woman certainly seemed to know her business - her advice about Earth fashion sounded very, well, sound. But Catra didn't like to be told, well, that pretty much everything she did was wrong.
"I thought we also should be authentic," Catra snapped. "And not act as if we were all sunshine and roses even when we're talking to idiots."
"You aren't going to talk to idiots," Melissa retorted. "Not unless you pick the wrong channel to give an interview."
"So, make it 'even when we're faced with lies and questions from idiots they quote' then," Catra said with a sneer.
"Even then, you can't lose your temper - that would leave a bad impression. You want to appear friendly. Firm in your stances but polite and respectful. No one likes a gloating jerk."
"They seem to be very popular in media," Glimmer pointed out.
"Jerks are popular in a certain crowd - if they are rude to people whom that crowd doesn't like. So, yes, being rude and dismissive about conservatives will be popular in more liberal circles, but won't make you more popular amongst conservatives," Melissa replied. "And that's your goal, isn't it?"
Glimmer's expression mirrored Catra's.
Bow cleared his head. "But we shouldn't put on an act," he said. "We don't want to lie to people to get them to like us."
Adora nodded emphatically. "We want to be honest."
"Besides, I'm already being nicer than usual if I don't scratch an idiot," Catra added with a scoff, flexing her claws.
Melissa blinked.
Adora quickly said. "Catra's kidding." She added a glare at her lover to ensure that this was true.
Catra nodded with a pout. "Unless they attack us, I won't touch them."
"You won't be attacked in a studio," Melissa told her.
"I wouldn't be so sure," Catra retorted. "I've organised an attack at a ball."
Melissa blinked.
"Stop sounding so proud about it!" Glimmer snapped.
Adora sighed.
*****
"What's wrong with my uniform?" Adora asked a short explanation and a quick assessment of her wardrobe later. "It's comfortable and sturdy." And it held a lot of memories.
"But it's rather plain," Melissa said. "The cuts in the sleeves are a nice style element, but the shoulders are a bit over the top. Overall, it lacks a certain something."
"Something what?" Adora frowned.
"Something that says 'I'm an alien magical princess and I'm here to help you' without being too in your face about it. No tiara, but…" Melissa took a step to the side and eyed Adora's hair. "...maybe a change of style there as well."
Adora resisted the urge to put a hand on top of her hairdo. She liked her hairstyle just as it was!
Catra snorted, and Adora glared at her - her lover's hairstyle had been deemed 'passable' already.
"What about a bare midriff?" Bow asked. Melissa narrowed her eyes at him, and he recoiled.
"That would not go over well at all with your target crowd."
"Are you sure?" Entrapta chimed in. "A lot of your media popular with conservatives feature such outfits rather prominently." She showed a picture of a woman in shorts and a knotted shirt in front of an orange car on her tablet. "See?"
Melissa sighed. "You don't want to be likened to such characters, trust me - that would sabotage your image."
"Ah." Entrapta frowned. "Is this an example of them liking something but pretending not to like it because it goes against a dominant part of their culture?"
"No, that's an example of conservative sexism. If you appear like that on television, they won't take you seriously at all," Melissa said.
Bow looked taken aback. "They won't?" He stared at his midriff.
Melissa sighed again. "It's different in your case."
"Homophobes! I got data about them!" Entrapta smiled. "Most of them will be attracted to you, Bow, but they will try to deny and suppress their feelings."
Bow grimaced. "I'm not sure if I should be flattered or alarmed."
"Alarmed. Definitely alarmed," Melissa said. "But we can work with your style - but it's not for everyone else."
"Aw! I bet Adora would rock that look!" Catra crowed.
Adora felt herself blush in response. She cleared her throat. "Anyway, we have been seen on television already. Shouldn't we stick with our, ah, image?" The Earth leaders basically always wore the same suits anyway, right?
Melissa nodded. "But a few touch-ups would greatly improve your image. You might even set a new trend. Or rather, you'll boost an already starting trend."
"Well, Glimmer, you can put your royal coronation outfit on," Adora suggested.
"That's just my cape," Glimmer replied.
"It still looks nice and, uh, regal?" Adora tilted her head with a forced smile.
"We should stick you into your prom dress," Catra said.
"But it's not a ball," Entrapta protested. "Or is it? I'm still working on gathering data on Earth social conventions."
Melissa sighed once more.
*****
Pentagon, Washington DC, Earth, September 11th, 1998 (Earth Time)
Samantha Carter wished she had a spaceship. Or a working ring transporter. It would make the trips to Washington to brief generals and politicians more bearable. Since there hasn't been a C-37 available today, and commercial flights had been deemed not safe enough, she'd had to hitch a ride on a C-130 today. That hadn't been comfortable enough to work efficiently and had taken much longer than a spaceship would have. And all for a briefing she could have done remotely through a video conference, anyway - and she had refuted the Pentagon's security concerns thoroughly in her latest report, which apparently had been ignored.
'Ours is not to reason why', as Daniel would quote if she complained to him. And that was why she was here for what the Colonel would call 'a complete waste of time'. At least she had been able to catch up on paperwork on the flight.
"No, Sir, I don't think handing the spare Stargate over to the United Nations is a workable solution," she repeated herself. They had gone over this already, back when it had first been proposed as a response to the demands from the Security Council. There was a reason everyone was busy planning to make the takeover of Stargate Command go through with the least amount of friction.
"I wasn't talking about diplomatic issues, Captain." The Army general who had asked her about it frowned at her. "We called you here for technical advice."
"And I am talking about the technical aspects," she retorted. "As my report about this stated, running two Stargates in one location - on one planet - creates interference since both use the same gate address." A report she had written shortly after discovering the second gate through this very effect, which had ended with herself and the Colonel getting stuck in an ice cave in the Antarctic. "We would end up with multiple misconnections - and possibly fatalities from our defences."
"Thank you. We didn't call you here to discuss that, anyway," the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff said, shutting up the obnoxious general with a glare. "There is talk about relocating the Stargate to a more accessible location, either in Canada or Australia."
Ah. She nodded - Iwan had told them about that. Russia's proposal to use Siberia had apparently been rejected despite, as he claimed, their great experience with 'building entire research centres and bases in the middle of nowhere so expected accidents do not hurt civilians.'
"So, we would like your assessment of the proposed locations from a technical point of view," the Chairman went on.
Did they expect her to give an assessment of the logistical issues without any time to study said locations in detail? Sam almost shook her head. "As long as the power requirements for the operation of the Stargate are met and there is enough space to house the equipment and staff, any location will be suitable for running Stargate Command, as far as the technical aspect is concerned," she said. "Unlike with satellite launches, location provides no inherent benefit or drawback." And with alien technology, the advantage of being closer to the equator for launches would vanish as well.
"That would require a large power plant," another general said. "A very large power plant."
"Yes, Sir."
"Are there alternatives to such a plant?" he asked.
"The DHD the Russians recovered could fuel the Stargate independently, but its capacity is limited," she said. "Enough for the average use of a Stargate, but not enough to power it for constant high-volume traffic. Its recovery rate is not high enough, and we haven't yet managed to duplicate its power generation method." Not for lack of trying on her part.
"Ah."
"Etherian technology would offer compact alternatives - compact compared to a conventional power plant, not a DHD," she went on.
She noted that several Generals frowned or even winced. The Chairman nodded, though. "That would require their support."
"Yes, Sir." She nodded emphatically. If any of the people present thought the United States could accomplish this without outside help, they hadn't read her reports at all.
"Wonderful," the Army general who had asked her about the second Stargate muttered. "More leverage for them."
"Speaking of the Etherians," an admiral spoke up, "did they voice any preference or resistance to specific locations or climates?"
Catra didn't like the ocean, but Sam didn't think that was relevant here. "Based on their references to events during their war, I think they would prefer to avoid arctic climates as well as deserts."
"We can plant our Stargate where we damn well want," the first general muttered again.
"You mean where the Security Council wants it," the admiral corrected him. "Canada would be much closer to us - and to Europe. Wherever this gate is installed will become a hub for the entire planet. It needs a good harbour - we'll want to base a fleet there to protect the shipping."
"A space fleet," another general - Air Force - added with a smirk.
The admiral frowned at him. "I do not think cargo ships will be replaced by spaceships any time soon, at least on Earth. And by the time space cargo ships are common, the Navy will have adapted."
"What?" The Air Force general glared at him. "Space is clearly the domain of the Air Force!"
"Only as long as it was about satellite reconnaissance. If anyone has the experience to run a ship, it's the Navy. You can't run a ship, or a spaceship, as if it were a plane!"
"Oh, yeah? Just watch us!"
Sam refrained from rolling her eyes or otherwise showing her reaction. They still hadn't made much progress forming an alliance with the Etherians, and the Navy and the Air Force brass were already squabbling over who got to run a hypothetical fleet in space?
They needed to get their priorities straight!
Besides, it was clear that the Air Force had the most experience here.
*****