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Stupid job humor

doomlord9

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I hope I'm not alone but there are those times when you're doing your job and you see something. It's completely normal, you see it dozens of times a day, but this time you just can't help but see it from a slightly different angle and this time....this time it's just so damn funny you can't help but laugh, and then everyone around you asks what was funny hoping for something to make the day go faster but the funny was just so stupid they just look at you weird when you try to explain it.

I'm not the only one....right? right?

Anyway, this is where you can put those and hopefully the other freaks your peers on the internet will understand you.

I am a Material Handler, meaning I drive a Hilo(forklift being the common term) and move heavy stuff from one place to another.

As this is an electric Hilo, it has an electronic parking brake. To disengage the parking brake you have to cycle the brake, but what the screen specifically says is 'Depress brake pedal'. Lately I have been seeing that and I just want to start insulting it trying to make it depressed.

'You know, nobody likes you. Everything you get involved, everything just stop. You take all the speed out of everything, that's why everyone is always stepping on you all the time!'

'Your mother was an emergency stop button! Whenever someone hits that, the whole place just grinds to a halt and the money just starts pouring down the drain!'

Shortly afterwards I had to restart the hilo and it tells me 'Turn key on'

....

'Oh yeah, I'm gonna put my fingers around your nub and turn it just right. Yeah, you like that don't you? It really gets to motor running doesn't it?'
 
Really? Nobody else has any funny-if-you-are-bored-and-squint stories? No instructions from a restaurant/fast food place where they are told to beat the meat until the juices flow freely or anything in that vein? Am I the only one who saw an amusing thing and everyone else just does the same thing day in and day out in the times between sleep and being on the internet?

Or am I the only one who admits to it? *looks at the other QQ threads* I would have thought shame and embarrassment would have been weened out of most everyone by now/
 
Nothing you can't find around the internet, as I work (for the most part) alone. And those I have, well, they don't translate right to english.
 
No, it's just that you posted in the SFW General. Most of the time I forget this board is even here.

I thought it was funny.


Ahh. I don't bother looking at categories, I just browse the 'New Posts' button at the top, then hit 'Mark all posts as read' when I have read everything I wanted to, which clears the list and means when I next hit 'New Posts' everything is.....well, new.

Much more efficient and it means I see stuff everything regardless of where it was posted, only that it was posted since I lasted checked.
 
Only if you don't mess up with the buttons.

I've never like "mark all as read" buttons. It's like asking the internet to lie to me.

Yeah, it bothered me too until I saw it as 'Clear recent posts and mark all subsequent posts as new' and started using it like that. Usually after work or sleep, I only have about 3 pages to look through, maybe 5 if I'm gone for a day or two.

It's a very workable system and if something new pops up you'll always see it regardless of where it is actually posted, that part is the reason I use it so much. I'd miss alot of things if I had to search the thread lists manually.
 
I do something similar by subscribing to forums.
 
Ahh. I don't bother looking at categories, I just browse the 'New Posts' button at the top, then hit 'Mark all posts as read' when I have read everything I wanted to, which clears the list and means when I next hit 'New Posts' everything is.....well, new.

Much more efficient and it means I see stuff everything regardless of where it was posted, only that it was posted since I lasted checked.

That's the same thing I do. Except I don't bother with the mark all read button, I just remember when I was last on and look back until I get to that time. Yeah, a bit more trouble, but it also lets me keep track of stuff I didn't get around to reading yet but intend to that way.
 

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