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Cosmos Quest (Naruto/Lupin III)

[X] What a beautiful day to be free...

Sasuke is incredibly nervous to see the two of you in the same room. That you are feigning tears only deepens his dread.

"I don't know where I went wrong, sensei," you sniffle. "I didn't raise him to break the law in front of witnesses!"

"Maa, maa," Kakashi says, patting you on the shoulder, "you mustn't blame yourself, Ino-chan; he simply fell in with a bad crowd."

Poor kid. He doesn't know whether to get embarrassed or pissed. "Please stop."

"How could you, Gaara?" you demand, clutching dramatically at the bars. "After I trusted you to look out for him!"

"Here's your fifty," the redhead says, a tendril of sand holding it out to you.

"I thought you looked like a dependable kid," you reply cheerfully, tucking it up your sleeve. After having to pay out the ANBU's hundred to Kankuro, it feels good.

Gaara holds up his hands with a cocky grin. "Hey, my looks are nice, but I got more to offer than a pretty face."

"No you don't," Sasuke and Temari say as one. The blonde girl blinks at your childhood friend from the doorway.

"Jealous, both of you," Gaara declares. "Where's that brother of mine? Sometimes I feel like he's the only one who appreciates me."

"Kankuro and Baki are smoothing things over with the ANBU upstairs," Temari says, discreetly slipping you the forty she owes you. "Get your shit and let's get back to the hotel room before our chaperon dies of shame."

"You too," you nod to Sasuke.

Ninja jail cells have bars as a formality, but really it's the seals in the walls that keep prisoners in; concussive ones that foil escape attempts, and subtler ones that foil good escape attempts. When your bail is paid you don't leave through the door, because there is no door. You just shunshin out.

"Is Ami handling the bail?" Sasuke asks as he does so.

"Ami's at home in bed, as far as I know. She isn't too happy with you."

"What? What for?"

Oooooof course he's surprised. It's Sasuke, what did you expect.

"You picked a fight with Gaara over nothing, then joined a fight Gaara started with the ANBU, lost her three hundred ryo by losing the fight, and got arrested for drunken and disorderly conduct," you explain.

He frowns. "It wasn't over nothing! This idiot kept flirting with her and sayin' stuff about you-"

"Y'mean the same stuff I say about boys all the time?" you ask frankly. "And if ya don't want cute foreigners making Ami blush, maybe you should give her a better compliment on her exam performance than 'Well done'."

"'Cute'?" Gaara asks of no one in particular, raising an eyebrow and apparently thinking for a moment, before shrugging. "I can work with that."

"Not tonight you can't," Temari says doggedly, dragging him out of the room by his arm. Laughing, he gives Sasuke a two-finger salute.

"See ya 'round, Sauce. Ino, I'll see you in my dreams."

"Not if I see you first," Sasuke grumbles.

"Speaking of dreams," Kakashi puts in, and you almost twitch; you half forgot he was there, "the two of you should head off to bed."

"Maa, sensei, Sasuke and I don't have that kind of relationship!" you protest, wide-eyed.

"Nor should you," he replies, "you'd devastate Ami."

Sasuke 'urks' quietly.

=

The next day, your father is at your breakfast table when you come downstairs. No one else is up yet; it's just the two of you.

"Ino," he says before you can so much as wish him a good morning, "as the head of your clan, I am ordering you: if you come up against Gaara in the finals, you-"

"- will show everyone why even the battle-monsters think twice before fucking with us," you transition smoothly, opening the fridge door. "Would you like some orange juice or something?"

"No thank you," he answers, "and don't change the subject. I don't give you many orders, Ino, and I will not let you brush this one off."

Oh, you are not going to like this conversation. He hasn't congratulated you on your truly noteworthy success in the first two stages, which can only mean bad things.

You pour your own juice, and take the seat across from him.

"I've been very lenient with you," Inoichi says. "Much more lenient than any of your friends' parents have been with them, because you have always shown the best judgement I can expect of someone as young as you are, and because I don't believe in stifling your spark. But you cannot fight Sabaku no Gaara. The risks are too great and the rewards too meagre."

"Even with Sharingan Kakashi helping me prepare?" you ask, raising an eyebrow.

"Even with," he confirms, not even looking surprised to hear. "Though I expect you to apply yourself assiduously to the training he has prepared for you regardless. It may be a secondary concern to the training you'll be doing with me, but-"

Your dad says some other things, but that's the point you stick on. Training. Clan training. Intensive, the way the other clans do it.

What's changed?

You think back to last night - what exactly did Kakashi say...?

"A test," Kakashi says, looking very pleased with himself. "Gai told me you intend to, ah, 'nobly clash with Gaara of the Sand Waterfall'."

You can barely believe your ears. "And you want to train me for the fight?"

He shrugs. "I do now."


He never said he was there to train you for the exam. Originally it was just a test. A test to see if you should receive training? Or...? And for what reason?

What's changed?

[X] Ask.

[X] Make a guess. (Write-in)

[X] Hear him out, then agree to not fight, then go behind his back to figure out what the hell is up. He's practically inviting you to.
 
[X] Explain to Dad the recently-friendly relationships with the Sand Siblings. It's your dad, who else can you trust?
 
Sorry Sasuke, Ami is your destiny.

So pleased this is back on. I'll need to think about possible motives before I break down and [X] Ask. Asking just feels like giving up.

Just a first, preliminary guess: clearly Gaara's chakra still feels like a scary demon, and Ino is known for poking things with sticks. Yamanaka techniques on an unstable jinchuuriki is bad news.
 
Hmm. Some guesses.

Gaara is a jink. Dangerous like WHOA, and Inoichi is a sensor. I'm sure he can sense how utterly terrifying that chakra is and wants his darling girl away from it. We did kinda have one Bad End from bad judgement soooooooo not unjustified.

I'm sorely tempted to ask, "Is this about the Kyuubi," just to kick this hornet nest and see what it stirs up. I'd bet on Inoichi giving away SOMETHING.

Focus on Yamanaka mind arts: Ino is not stupid enough to use them on Gaara. By having us focus on those, we CANNOT fight Gaara. So basically making the prospect of doing so more daunting as the deadline draws closer. Also, we catch up on clan heiress duties, and make a more traditional showing in the chunin exams. This favors our future career, as keeping Ranton, masks, and some other genjutsu tricks under our kimono is a considerable asset.

Thinks SB is goading her into this. Well, he's not unjustified. SB would. And he doesn't want Ino to take serious risks.

Secret test of character: if we're really determined to do this, we won't stop because Inoichi told us to. If we buckle down, we weren't ready. But this is a Japanese society and this is practically the only time Inoichi has laid down the law. For the 'right' answer to be straight up disobey him? Even as his heir, that seems pretty shaky. Can't really see it, but maybe.



If I had to make a bet on the, "Why the new focus on clan arts," specifically, I'd bet on my reasoning for how Yamanaka mind arts aren't likely to be good against Gaara. At least the ones we'd learn earlier on. I don't think it's the full reason, but it's probably part of it.

Tempted to make a bet with Inoichi. We've made something on our own time that he cannot replicate. If he can't replicate our work, we get to decide our own training schedule because it has clearly produced significant benefits.
 
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None of the guesses so far have been right, but I would be astounded if someone did guess what was up.
 
[] "You think that if I reach the point where I present an actual challenge to Gaara, he's going to stop holding back and thrash everything, don't you?"
[] "There's something that's going to happen which is going to require every able friendly hand to work against, and you don't want Gaara and I to wear each other out before the thing happens?"
[] "What, does Gaara's family have some weird law where they have to marry anyone who defeats them?"
 
....Do we have enough information to put an accurate answer together, or do we almost literally have to get lucky?

Say, why are we sleeping at our house when we were rooming with Sasuke? I don't wanna go paranoid, "Inoichi broke into our head and wiped the encounter," territory, that's rather stupid, but if Inoichi has reasons to worry about our mental state, well. That explains needing to teach us mind stuff. Get this under control one way or another.

From his perspective at least. I wouldn't blame him for freaking out about Lupin in his daughter's head, there's a lot of reasons to freak. His little girl was a different person from the moment of conception and practically has foreign sensibilities hard-wired in. Would seriously considering abandoning the Yamanaka clan to go to the world she feels she belongs in. And anyone who disagrees can stuff it, regardless of the ultimate decision it is still a decision and Ino would almost certainly be weighing the pros and cons of both sides. Instead of going, "Hell no, I'm staying with my family and Konoha," she'd go, "Ooooh....tough call."

In fact I'd like to hear Lupin's opinion on this, he's been surprising quiet in this scene.

I don't think Inoichi would have concluded we're a reincarnation yet, not on his own, but I could be wrong. Someone may have tipped him off and now he wants to do what he can. Not hot on this theory, seems a bit stupid on Inoichi's part, but Inoichi has done stupid things and crammed his foot down his throat on similar matters.

I'm....nearly certain Inoichi would not advocate 'reclaiming' our past life if he suspected we were a reincarnation. Not more than we already have.

I don't think our mother is well-connected enough to be putting pieces together already, but she is a pretty big unknown and if Inoichi shared enough details she might have put something together and convinced Inoichi to do something. I do recall something about her childhood path maybe leading us to study at a school Sherlock Holmes founded, so maybe mother dearest has some detective chops and has made a strong case to Inoichi.

And for an outside guess, the Yamanaka member who hears SB voices in their head has heard Gaara is a bloodthirsty psycho and relayed such to Inoichi. Inoichi is now trying to metagame with piecemeal canon knowledge and is going to fail horribly. Cracky, but might hold up. Main question is, why is this only happening now?

Kakashi may have done something. If has, fuck if I can guess.


[] "What, does Gaara's family have some weird law where they have to marry anyone who defeats them?"

*snrk*

[] "There's something that's going to happen which is going to require every able friendly hand to work against, and you don't want Gaara and I to wear each other out before the thing happens?"

Mmm....also possible, but my money is still on no chunin exam interruption at all.





Also, cause I forgot to say it earlier, I adored the jailhouse conversation. All of it. It was fantastic.
 
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[] You don't want me to get too much attention by defeating a jinchuuriki?
 
FurikoMaru said:
"Maa, sensei, Sasuke and I don't have that kind of relationship!" you protest, wide-eyed.

"Nor should you," he replies, "you'd devastate Ami."

Sasuke 'urks' quietly.

Not a problem. I think we still have mistress rights from Ami for introducing her to Jiraiya, so we're covered.
 
Disminded said:
Not a problem. I think we still have mistress rights from Ami for introducing her to Jiraiya, so we're covered.

Indeed we do, although I'm pretty sure Ami still has dibs on Sasuke's virginity.

And I'm sure Kakashi knows the status of all his students' virginity. Less because of being a creeper, more because super-observent ninja. Who likes to creep people out.
 
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Hymn of Ragnarok said:
Indeed we do, although I'm pretty sure Ami still has dibs on Sasuke's virginity.

And I'm sure Kakashi knows the status of all his students' virginity. Less because of being a creeper, more because super-observent ninja. Who likes to creep people out.
I'm pretty sure that a lot of people are interested in the state of Sasuke's virginity.

And not just preteen girls, either.

That said, it wouldn't really surprise me if Kakashi is either ordered to cockblock the kid, or if he'd just do it for fun.
 
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No one's really worried about Sasuke hooking up; even setting aside the fact that he's only thirteen, as far as anyone can tell, he's likely to be a late bloomer.

Not to dash anyone's shipping hopes, but I consider canon-Sasuke an asexual homoromantic, and Cosmos-Sasuke isn't terribly different on that count; his close friendship just happens to be with a chick this time.
 
FurikoMaru said:
No one's really worried about Sasuke hooking up; even setting aside the fact that he's only thirteen, as far as anyone can tell, he's likely to be a late bloomer.
Worried? I like to imagine people throwing their daughters and nieces at him.

It's just constantly raining women around him, and Sasuke would rather be out training.
 
Guile said:
I'm pretty sure that a lot of people are interested in the state of Sasuke's virginity.

And not just preteen girls, either.

That said, it wouldn't really surprise me if Kakashi is either ordered to cockblock the kid, or if he'd just do it for fun.

FurikoMaru said:
No one's really worried about Sasuke hooking up; even setting aside the fact that he's only thirteen, as far as anyone can tell, he's likely to be a late bloomer.

I dunno, Kakashi cockblocking Sasuke for kicks sounds terribly amusing....

Maybe instead Kakashi maneuvers Sasuke into numerous situations that could get Sasuke laid if he only cared to put in a tiny bit of effort. Sasuke doesn't. Every other man with a pulse can see it though. Sasuke is annoyed at having to deal with pests, especially pests even Sasuke knows he can't mouth off to (Sasuke dealing with an amorous princess sounds hilarious).

In trolling Sasuke, Kakashi trolls his gender.

And nobody worried about Sasuke hooking up? Furiko, what have you done to Danzo?!

Not to dash anyone's shipping hopes, but I consider canon-Sasuke an asexual homoromantic, and Cosmos-Sasuke isn't terribly different on that count; his close friendship just happens to be with a chick this time.

Seems legit.
 
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I would just assume that Danzo already has like a billion Uchiha semen samples somewhere. Just waiting for the last of the current Uchiha to kill each other off for a 'resurgence' of 'dormant genes' in some conveniently ultrapatriotic and loyal but otherwise unremarkable career chunin babbies.

If the older Uchiha are still around to object to this, it throws questions and obstacles in the path, but it means that they might make babby in their own good time, too.

Either way, he wins.
 
[X] Okay dad.
If we're not fighting him, then we can pal around all month instead~
 
Huh. Well okay I guess.....not sure I'm seeing what Furiko is seeing, but eh. Maybe it'll make sense in the morning.

[X] Okay dad.
If we're not fighting him, then we can pal around all month instead~
 
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Oh, don't attribute anything important to it. It's just an inside joke.
 
It's back!
FurikoMaru said:
[X] What a beautiful day to be free...
Sublime ft The Pharcyde - Summertime
FurikoMaru said:
Sasuke is incredibly nervous to see the two of you in the same room. That you are feigning tears only deepens his dread.
"I don't know where I went wrong, sensei," you sniffle. "I didn't raise him to break the law in front of witnesses!"
"Maa, maa," Kakashi says, patting you on the shoulder, "you mustn't blame yourself, Ino-chan; he simply fell in with a bad crowd."
Good lord but Kakashi is a troll.
FurikoMaru said:
Gaara holds up his hands with a cocky grin. "Hey, my looks are nice, but I got more to offer than a pretty face."
"No you don't," Sasuke and Temari say as one. The blonde girl blinks at your childhood friend from the doorway.
I smell the start of a beautiful friendship through shared suffering......

FurikoMaru said:
Ninja jail cells have bars as a formality, but really it's the seals in the walls that keep prisoners in; concussive ones that foil escape attempts, and subtler ones that foil good escape attempts. When your bail is paid you don't leave through the door, because there is no door. You just shunshin out.
So how do they handle incapacitated prisoners?
Blow up the cell? Tunnel through the floor?

FurikoMaru said:
The next day, your father is at your breakfast table when you come downstairs. No one else is up yet; it's just the two of you.
"Ino," he says before you can so much as wish him a good morning, "as the head of your clan, I am ordering you: if you come up against Gaara in the finals, you-"
Why the rush?
Why is he raising clan business in your frat house, where there are multiple ears listening and/or interrupting?
Why first thing in the morning?
Why lay down an ultimatum to us, without an explanation?


Are we sure this is Inoichi?
Kakashi has shown it's possible to spoof your senses, after all.
Or is he operating under orders?
Is this Sarutobi's doing?


FurikoMaru said:
"No thank you," he answers, "and don't change the subject. I don't give you many orders, Ino, and I will not let you brush this one off."
*snip*
You pour your own juice, and take the seat across from him.
"I've been very lenient with you," Inoichi says. "Much more lenient than any of your friends' parents have been with them, because you have always shown the best judgement I can expect of someone as young as you are, and because I don't believe in stifling your spark. But you cannot fight Sabaku no Gaara.
*snip*
"A test," Kakashi says, looking very pleased with himself. "Gai told me you intend to, ah, 'nobly clash with Gaara of the Sand Waterfall'."
You can barely believe your ears. "And you want to train me for the fight?"
He shrugs. "I do now."

He never said he was there to train you for the exam. Originally it was just a test. A test to see if you should receive training? Or...? And for what reason?
What's changed?
Why did Kakashi specifically send us to bed? What discussions happened after we went to bed?
The Nara-Akimichi-Yamanaka axis tend to be pretty laid back about advanced training, so why the rush in the next month?
Is Orochimaru's invasion still on here?
The Forest heavyweight we dodged was a significant plot point?


Who were we supposed to be sent after in the capital, by the way? Tsunade?
It is obvious now that Kakashi chose to train us on his own initiative, so what was the original plan?


Did the realization that Kankuro was one of ours(and yeah, pretty sure Shikaku would know by now via Shikamaru, which means Inoichi would know) mean he felt the need to enhance our mental defenses against past life memories?
Our Throning Kankuro was not especially subtle, and anyone who knows us can predict why we would enThrone someone we hadn't met before the exam.
And his behavior post-convo displayed a degree of familiarity that we hadn't had IRL experience to generate.


But our post-convo behavior suggests our loyalties aren't much changed,, and if we were considered a flight risk, advanced training would not be on the table.
So what is the problem?
But you cannot fight Sabaku no Gaara. The risks are too great and the rewards too meagre."[font=verdana, arial, helvetica, sans-serif]*snip*
Your dad says some other things, but that's the point you stick on. Training. Clan training. Intensive, the way the other clans do it. [/font]

War warning? Did Hayate get killed again?
Or is this a covert attempt to check our head for booby traps?
Where is Asuma in all this?
Would an attempt to keep the subject of jinchuuriki under wraps worth the diplomatic hit to Suna from avoiding a fight with Gaara? It certainly isn't because of any serious concerns that Gaara is going to lose control, given the events of the last evening.


WYLD AS GESS TIEM
We are slated to be away from home for a long time post-Exam, and said mission is time-sensitive; perhaps an apprenticeship, perhaps infiltration.
Because it's a longterm mission involving the heir to a clan, they needed Inoichi's approval and a headsup.
Hence Inoichi is trying to cram as much as he can into our head as possible, and thus the need to avoid our getting injured.
Because he is under orders, he isn't giving a reason.
And also the attempt to avoid getting our face/ability especially noticeable.
If we get extra koto lessons, it's an infiltration; if not, it's an apprenticeship.


How warm am I, Furiko?


PS
"Not if I see you first."- Chris, Stand By Me(1986)
Should take me from 1 2/3 to 2 Z-slashes.
 
Reading back over the last double handful of updates, I admit I'm pretty confused.


Okay, we impressed Gai with our badassitude. And all those things we listed for him about needing someone to face Gaara are still true. Sand needs a spectacle in front of the paying customers.

We impressed Kakashi by sticking to our friends. I presume there are other layers here, because Kakashi. And given what we told Gai (whom I assume told Kakashi), I'm glad we declined since that would make us look really wishy-washy and led on by the temptation of personal glory if we immediately jumped on the special B-rank mission in spite of all that crap we said.

So what's dad's angle here? Just overprotective dad? He knows more than we do by default, well-connected jounin that he is, we can't really be sure we're seeing further than he is. We probably aren't. ... But at the same time we can't really trust a parent to be unbiased. And why the Yamanaka techniques? He must be thinking further than the Exam, those techniques aren't crowd pleasers...


So I really have no idea where to turn, here.
 
uju32 said:
The Forest heavyweight we dodged was a significant plot point?
The Forest 'heavyweight' was Shigure. If you'd gone through the regular way, he'd have met you instead of Gaara and there'd have been a mini arc where you would have had to evade him or fight him. The giant tigers might have shown up, but that's the extent of the importance of the forest monster.

uju32 said:
How warm am I, Furiko?
Arctic. ;)
 
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Those quotation marks could not possibly be more apt. :)) Shigure is that dork with the needle-umbrella that got Sand Coffin'd in canon. Yeah, surprise, he had a name.

You also would have run into Gaara, which could have turned into a fight if you fucked up. Is that what you guys were worrying over?
 
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FurikoMaru said:
Those quotation marks could not possibly be more apt. :)) Shigure is that dork with the needle-umbrella that got Sand Coffin'd in canon. Yeah, surprise, he had a name.

You also would have run into Gaara, which could have turned into a fight if you fucked up. Is that what you guys were worrying over?
No, I think we were all expecting some Naruto-esque plot twist involving S-rank ninja and an invasion or two.
 
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FurikoMaru said:
Those quotation marks could not possibly be more apt. :)) Shigure is that dork with the needle-umbrella that got Sand Coffin'd in canon. Yeah, surprise, he had a name.

You also would have run into Gaara, which could have turned into a fight if you fucked up. Is that what you guys were worrying over?

surprise surprise, I actually knew who you were talking about.

my first though on seeing the name was still her through.

426px-336632-shigure_01_capitulo_6.jpg
 
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So I've got two asks, two okay, dads and a bunch of uncommitted theories. Anyone else got anything to say?
 

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