[X] "My dad wants us to meet Kakashi before he shows up to the training grounds and tell him he's unofficially ordered to become a hands-on teacher posthaste."
You can't tell him. Not now.
You like to think he wouldn't back out of your promise to take revenge together, but honestly, there's no telling what he's liable to do if he finds out Itachi is coming back to Konoha right this minute. For gods' sake, the last time Weasel talked to him, he promised he'd return and kill Sasuke's friends if the boy didn't get strong enough fast enough.
And even if he doesn't run off to die or to train or whatever, Sasuke's not the wait-and-see type. He's going to start asking questions - he's going to want to know how this even happened, and because he is as subtle as a brick to the face, he will undoubtedly land both of you and your dad in front of Ibiki inside a week, if not a day.
No, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. You have a plan, and you're going to make sure Sasuke sticks to it; the two of you will become S-rank badasses, and then go weasel-hunting.
Training with Sharingan Kakashi is a good start.
=
"YOU'RE-" Naruto starts to yell, spraying food everywhere, but then stops, swallows, and looks confused. "... not late. What gives, sensei?" Setting aside his breakfast, he gets to his feet.
"This is Yamanaka Ino," Kakashi introduces you, ignoring the question. "As a favour, she'll be joining us for training for the next month." Jounin being jounin, you aren't surprised to notice he didn't say exactly who was doing who a favour, or mention the additional training you and he will be doing privately in the evenings.
Aburame Shino nods at you in quiet welcome, and downs the last of his tea.
"Why?" Naruto asks curiously. "Isn't she in the exams?" He perks up. "Does that mean we get super-cool chuunin exam training now?"
This kid is a ninja?
Technically.
"That's exactly what this means," Kakashi says cheerfully. "So settle down, my adorable student, and listen well." Abruptly, the happy façade drops. "I'm going to teach you how to kill a jounin."
Naruto flinches. The lines of Shino's face harden. Sasuke turns to stare at his teacher so fast you're surprised he doesn't get whiplash. For your part, you feel like someone's padlocked your tongue to the roof of your mouth.
"Well!" Kakashi says, all smiles again. "That's what I'd like to say, but the simple fact of the matter is that you suck too much to have any real chance of reaching that level within a month."
Lupin doesn't say anything, but you get the distinct impression he's angry about something.
"WHAT?!" Naruto roars indignantly, and despite the fact that he does so right in your ear, you grudgingly grant him some points for being the fastest to snap out of it, of the four of you. "If we suck, that's your fault as our teacher, isn't it?!"
"Naruto," Shino says quietly.
In a move unprecedented in your experience, the biggest attention whore you've ever met shuts up.
Red and Blue, is it? No wonder our little Sasuke feels left out.
"Why will we be learning to kill jounin specifically, sensei?" the bespectacled bug boy asks.
Kakashi explains about your situation with Gaara. Shino's ever-present frown deepens.
"Who does he think he is, startin' trouble in our village?" Naruto grumbles.
"The chuunin exams wouldn't be worth much if they weren't any trouble," you say, stretching.
"Mm! I guess you're right, there," he says, smiling cheekily. "I've decided! I'm gonna help you out with your training, Ino-chan! Just promise me you'll whup this guy good."
"You got it!" you reply with a grin.
... uh, Ino...?
You blink. Wait...
"Awright! Sensei, let's get to it!" Naruto has already moved on.
... so... if he's not a ninja, maybe he's some kind of voodoo priest?
=
You'll get the setup for the choice and the options themselves when I'm not so goddamn tired. I wanted to get this up, at least, to show I'm not dead. And neither is this quest.
=
"Now then..." Kakashi says casually. "Ino. I'll be using you as part of an important demonstration."
He punches you in the face.
[X] Take it and the broken nose that comes with it.
[X] Dodge!
-> [X] To your left, the side the fist is coming from
-> [X] To your right
-> [X] Backward
[X] Duck!
[X] Try to redirect his fist!
[X] Get inside his reach and kick him in the face!
[X] Jump!
-> [X] ... and be ready to counter or dodge the next blow when you come down
-> [X] ... and try to get in a good kick
[X] Write-in
