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Multiversal News Service
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Report 1
RandytheBlackKnight
That guy who sometimes does the things.
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The screen flickered, static creating a small light in the otherwise pitch black area, and then suddenly it stopped, the faint hissing was replaced by music while the black and white gave way to a dazzling array of colors.
Once the intro ran down the image shifted, a man in black gothic plate, complete with tabard and cloak sat behind a desk labeled "Multiversal News Service." He briefly shuffled the papers on in front of him before beginning.
"Hello, I'm Randy, and welcome to the Evening News. Tonight's top story, a shocking rise in developmental complications in children due to receiving cybernetic implants at too young an age."
The image zoomed in and a picture of an unnaturally pale child appeared beside him.
"Cybernetic implants are used for a variety of things, replacing damaged or lost limbs, restoring eyesight, and fixing hormonal imbalances. But they can also be used to significantly augment one's own abilities to superhuman levels of performance. These benefits are not without risk, however, allergies, rejection; botched procedures can lead to extreme and often, permeate damage. Unfortunately many parents are attempting to enhance their children despite such risks, as according to data provided by the Fourth Council of Ricks Health Ministry, as many as four billion children between the ages of six and ten have received significant levels of implantation by their parents."
"Unfortunately this can lead to many problems, as not only do the implants not grow with the child, but improper procedure or just plain bad luck can lead to severe neurological and muscle damage, from infections cause by the implant damaging the area around itself. Field reporter, Yuko Kanae has sat down to talk with Magos Filtrean Greith of the Forge World Scyon III."
The scene changed to one of a metal room with hazy light proved by great stain glass windows, standing in the center of it, in a professional looking suit was a slender woman with striking red hair from which rose two fox ears, four bushy tails, and microphone in hand. Next to here was a person that looked more machine than man, standing nearly twice her height with four massive servo arms and a much more mundane human arm poking through his crimson robes.
"Thank you Randy, now Magos Greith, I know that a lot of people around the Multiverse want to use technological augmentation to give their children an advantage later in life, do you think it is a safe practice at all?"
"Absolutely not, it has never been nor will it ever be safe to give children augments." The deep metallic voice boomed out from underneath his hood.
"Then at what age is it safe for a person to receive augmentation of that, and how much?" She asked, the man.
"In truth it varies from person to person, most augmentation should be left until after the body has stopped developing, but there are certain medical augments that can be safely used on teenagers depending on the situation. One should always seek out a qualified individual for advice before making any kind of decision in regards to augmentation for any purpose."
Yuko nodded "What about the reports of people turning to cheaper, counterfeit versions of augmetic devices out of a lack of funds, are there any cheaper alternatives to the main market ones that can be trusted?"
"By the Omnissiah, no! Most of those counterfeit augmetics are barely above being tech-heresy, and will not properly function in their supposed role for very long. The cheaper legitimate versions, while significantly safer than the counterfeits, suffer from a short lifespan and increased need for maintenance, costing the user far more in the long term." The Magos answered.
"So is there any solution for parents who want to help their children improve their potential performance in the long term?"
"Unfortunately there are few that will show significant results before the time that puberty ends, genecleansing is a popular and safe method of doing so, but will not impart significant gains. Genemodding is another option, in certain nations, but carries with it significant risks to the child's health."
Thank you Magos, as you can see folks, child augmentation is not safe by any means whatsoever. Back to you Randy."
The scene returned to the Knight, "Thank you Yuko, in other news, the Greater Galactic Reich and the Inter-solar Socialist Union have officially resumed hostilities after a two and a half year armistice."
Beside him two images came into being, the first one a flag that had a simplified white spiral galaxy with a black swastika in the center, surrounded by red, and the other being another red flag with a stylized sun that had a half cog broken by a hammer in it occupying the right field.
"This coming after the assassination of Mecha-Hitler by supposed communist agent Daniel Cobbler. Many analysts are fearful that this renewed conflict may draw in more powers from across the multiverse if it escalates. Several Sapient Rights Organizations have renewed protests against both governments for what they call "The worst violations of the rights of living beings since the Great Alwraithian Genocides." Both nations have officially broken off all diplomatic contact, making another truce unlikely.
"In finance the previous eight point jump of the Multiversal Stock Exchange has remained steady with no significant drop or increase from that position. However that may change soon as the New Republic of universe 789-341 has announced that it has found an unprecedented amount of Adamantium in the asteroid belt of a remote system, many mining interests are already making bids for rights to the area.
"That's all for tonight's news, thank you all for tuning in."
The show faded into an outro that lasted only for a brief minute, before the screen returned to showing naught but static.
Once the intro ran down the image shifted, a man in black gothic plate, complete with tabard and cloak sat behind a desk labeled "Multiversal News Service." He briefly shuffled the papers on in front of him before beginning.
"Hello, I'm Randy, and welcome to the Evening News. Tonight's top story, a shocking rise in developmental complications in children due to receiving cybernetic implants at too young an age."
The image zoomed in and a picture of an unnaturally pale child appeared beside him.
"Cybernetic implants are used for a variety of things, replacing damaged or lost limbs, restoring eyesight, and fixing hormonal imbalances. But they can also be used to significantly augment one's own abilities to superhuman levels of performance. These benefits are not without risk, however, allergies, rejection; botched procedures can lead to extreme and often, permeate damage. Unfortunately many parents are attempting to enhance their children despite such risks, as according to data provided by the Fourth Council of Ricks Health Ministry, as many as four billion children between the ages of six and ten have received significant levels of implantation by their parents."
"Unfortunately this can lead to many problems, as not only do the implants not grow with the child, but improper procedure or just plain bad luck can lead to severe neurological and muscle damage, from infections cause by the implant damaging the area around itself. Field reporter, Yuko Kanae has sat down to talk with Magos Filtrean Greith of the Forge World Scyon III."
The scene changed to one of a metal room with hazy light proved by great stain glass windows, standing in the center of it, in a professional looking suit was a slender woman with striking red hair from which rose two fox ears, four bushy tails, and microphone in hand. Next to here was a person that looked more machine than man, standing nearly twice her height with four massive servo arms and a much more mundane human arm poking through his crimson robes.
"Thank you Randy, now Magos Greith, I know that a lot of people around the Multiverse want to use technological augmentation to give their children an advantage later in life, do you think it is a safe practice at all?"
"Absolutely not, it has never been nor will it ever be safe to give children augments." The deep metallic voice boomed out from underneath his hood.
"Then at what age is it safe for a person to receive augmentation of that, and how much?" She asked, the man.
"In truth it varies from person to person, most augmentation should be left until after the body has stopped developing, but there are certain medical augments that can be safely used on teenagers depending on the situation. One should always seek out a qualified individual for advice before making any kind of decision in regards to augmentation for any purpose."
Yuko nodded "What about the reports of people turning to cheaper, counterfeit versions of augmetic devices out of a lack of funds, are there any cheaper alternatives to the main market ones that can be trusted?"
"By the Omnissiah, no! Most of those counterfeit augmetics are barely above being tech-heresy, and will not properly function in their supposed role for very long. The cheaper legitimate versions, while significantly safer than the counterfeits, suffer from a short lifespan and increased need for maintenance, costing the user far more in the long term." The Magos answered.
"So is there any solution for parents who want to help their children improve their potential performance in the long term?"
"Unfortunately there are few that will show significant results before the time that puberty ends, genecleansing is a popular and safe method of doing so, but will not impart significant gains. Genemodding is another option, in certain nations, but carries with it significant risks to the child's health."
Thank you Magos, as you can see folks, child augmentation is not safe by any means whatsoever. Back to you Randy."
The scene returned to the Knight, "Thank you Yuko, in other news, the Greater Galactic Reich and the Inter-solar Socialist Union have officially resumed hostilities after a two and a half year armistice."
Beside him two images came into being, the first one a flag that had a simplified white spiral galaxy with a black swastika in the center, surrounded by red, and the other being another red flag with a stylized sun that had a half cog broken by a hammer in it occupying the right field.
"This coming after the assassination of Mecha-Hitler by supposed communist agent Daniel Cobbler. Many analysts are fearful that this renewed conflict may draw in more powers from across the multiverse if it escalates. Several Sapient Rights Organizations have renewed protests against both governments for what they call "The worst violations of the rights of living beings since the Great Alwraithian Genocides." Both nations have officially broken off all diplomatic contact, making another truce unlikely.
"In finance the previous eight point jump of the Multiversal Stock Exchange has remained steady with no significant drop or increase from that position. However that may change soon as the New Republic of universe 789-341 has announced that it has found an unprecedented amount of Adamantium in the asteroid belt of a remote system, many mining interests are already making bids for rights to the area.
"That's all for tonight's news, thank you all for tuning in."
The show faded into an outro that lasted only for a brief minute, before the screen returned to showing naught but static.
Last edited:
Report 2
RandytheBlackKnight
That guy who sometimes does the things.
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AN: Technically late due to issues with Windows deciding to ignore all of my settings in regards to updating and just doing it, but here it is.
The city was best described as a massive contradiction; modern buildings intermingled with medieval constructions and futuristic superstructures without regard to rhyme or reason. Yet despite this, in almost every house, be it by radio, television, computer, phone or some arcane means, tuned into the same broadcast.
"Hello, I'm Randy and welcome to the evening news. Tonight's top story, an environmental crisis of epic proportions has finally come to an end. The planet of Vergio IV has been undergoing a unique environmental crisis that threatened to make the planet totally uninhabitable for the nearly a decade now, but thanks to the cleaver modification of existing terraforming technologies, that threat is over, and the healing can begin."
Beside the knight an image of a planet covered in black wasteland with stubborn areas of green cling to its coasts appeared. Around it were several space stations, a natural ring, and two moderately sized moons.
"It all started nine and half years ago, when an archeological expedition found an abandoned terrestrial wormhole generator, two months later a convict mage by the name of Gunther Balelok attempted to fortify the complex and continue his illegal research. However, his magic interacted poorly with the portal, which authorities believe he reactivated to use as an escape route, causing a massive explosion. The resulting mix of quantum and magical energy was extremely deadly to all life, and quickly began to spread throughout the surrounding environment, until the planets sole continent was nearly stripped of all life."
"Thankfully after years of research, a scientific team sent by the Church of Madoka managed to modify a common atmospheric condenser to remove the toxic fallout from the air, halting the spread of devastation over the planet. Our field reporter is currently on planet with the governor."
The scene switched to an island city, a kitsune standing with a Turian in a tailored suit. At the bottom of the screen the words "New Telhan, Provisional Capital" appeared in bold white lettering.
"Thank you Randy, I'm here with Governor Jarin Teclas, Governor, how does it feel knowing that the crisis is finally over?" Yuko spoke into the microphone, before pointing it towards the Turian.
"Well, I think I can speak for everyone when I say it's an indescribable relief for the effects to finally be contained." He spoke in a somewhat nervous voice.
"Are there any plans to reclaim the wasteland areas moving forward?" She asked
"Oh yes, we were lucky enough to get viable populations of most flora and fauna native to the planet established off world before the disaster started, and from what we can tell from the satellites most of the cities we had to evacuate are still largely intact." He cleared his throat. "So once the areas are declared free of contamination, it's just a matter of reintroducing the various components of the local ecosystem and fixing any wear that's accumulated in the cities."
"Is there a solid estimate for how long all of that will take?"
"I've spoken with several of the research teams that have been helping us and the general consensus is that it won't take more than a standard decade to fully reverse the damage, and less than two years to get the cities back to normal if everything goes well."
Yuko nodded, "How well have the people received the news that they might be able to return home soon?"
"They were, Spirits, I can't even describe how thankful everyone is, after all these years of uncertainty they can finally have their lives back. Those scientists, well, they're all heroes."
"Thank you for your time, Governor Teclas." She turned to the camera, "And there it is, after years of hopelessness and despair, a planet has been saved, and its people can finally return to normality. Back to you Randy."
The scene returned to the studio, where the knight still sat.
"Thank you Yuko, and best of luck to everyone on Vergio IV."
"Onto Sports, the Inter-universal Martial Arts League has commenced the new season with a Joust at Castle Bastonne in the Kingdom of Bretonnia of universe 6687. Many commenters called it a "grand affair" and a "supreme show of chivalry and sportsmanship" with the Knight Sybil Decaut, a rising star in the League, taking a surprising win over the Grail Knight Henry d'Monfort, who appeared to be in good spirits despite the loss."
"Overall it was one of the highest rated opening events for the League, and many view it as a positive step for Bretonnia moving forward culturally. The League will now progress as normal, with a total of five major and fifteen minor tournaments planned before the season's Closing Event, which is to be held in New Haven, Capital of the Holy Britannian Empire on Earth 75136."
"In finance the Opening up of the deposits of Adamantum discussed yesterday by the New Republic of universe 789-341 has indeed caused a further increase in the Multiversal Stock Exchange, adding an extra two points, and bringing it to a record high of thirty points. For those unaware one point in the MSE's scoring system is worth a thousand in most others, making it equivalent to thirty thousand points in most other exchanges scales."
"Thank you for watching tonight's broadcast, I've been Randy, and have a good night."
Across the city, lights faded and noise lowered as most went to sleep, and those bound to the night, by quirk or obligation began to roam the streets.
AN2: it is happy news today, yay happiness!
The city was best described as a massive contradiction; modern buildings intermingled with medieval constructions and futuristic superstructures without regard to rhyme or reason. Yet despite this, in almost every house, be it by radio, television, computer, phone or some arcane means, tuned into the same broadcast.
"Hello, I'm Randy and welcome to the evening news. Tonight's top story, an environmental crisis of epic proportions has finally come to an end. The planet of Vergio IV has been undergoing a unique environmental crisis that threatened to make the planet totally uninhabitable for the nearly a decade now, but thanks to the cleaver modification of existing terraforming technologies, that threat is over, and the healing can begin."
Beside the knight an image of a planet covered in black wasteland with stubborn areas of green cling to its coasts appeared. Around it were several space stations, a natural ring, and two moderately sized moons.
"It all started nine and half years ago, when an archeological expedition found an abandoned terrestrial wormhole generator, two months later a convict mage by the name of Gunther Balelok attempted to fortify the complex and continue his illegal research. However, his magic interacted poorly with the portal, which authorities believe he reactivated to use as an escape route, causing a massive explosion. The resulting mix of quantum and magical energy was extremely deadly to all life, and quickly began to spread throughout the surrounding environment, until the planets sole continent was nearly stripped of all life."
"Thankfully after years of research, a scientific team sent by the Church of Madoka managed to modify a common atmospheric condenser to remove the toxic fallout from the air, halting the spread of devastation over the planet. Our field reporter is currently on planet with the governor."
The scene switched to an island city, a kitsune standing with a Turian in a tailored suit. At the bottom of the screen the words "New Telhan, Provisional Capital" appeared in bold white lettering.
"Thank you Randy, I'm here with Governor Jarin Teclas, Governor, how does it feel knowing that the crisis is finally over?" Yuko spoke into the microphone, before pointing it towards the Turian.
"Well, I think I can speak for everyone when I say it's an indescribable relief for the effects to finally be contained." He spoke in a somewhat nervous voice.
"Are there any plans to reclaim the wasteland areas moving forward?" She asked
"Oh yes, we were lucky enough to get viable populations of most flora and fauna native to the planet established off world before the disaster started, and from what we can tell from the satellites most of the cities we had to evacuate are still largely intact." He cleared his throat. "So once the areas are declared free of contamination, it's just a matter of reintroducing the various components of the local ecosystem and fixing any wear that's accumulated in the cities."
"Is there a solid estimate for how long all of that will take?"
"I've spoken with several of the research teams that have been helping us and the general consensus is that it won't take more than a standard decade to fully reverse the damage, and less than two years to get the cities back to normal if everything goes well."
Yuko nodded, "How well have the people received the news that they might be able to return home soon?"
"They were, Spirits, I can't even describe how thankful everyone is, after all these years of uncertainty they can finally have their lives back. Those scientists, well, they're all heroes."
"Thank you for your time, Governor Teclas." She turned to the camera, "And there it is, after years of hopelessness and despair, a planet has been saved, and its people can finally return to normality. Back to you Randy."
The scene returned to the studio, where the knight still sat.
"Thank you Yuko, and best of luck to everyone on Vergio IV."
"Onto Sports, the Inter-universal Martial Arts League has commenced the new season with a Joust at Castle Bastonne in the Kingdom of Bretonnia of universe 6687. Many commenters called it a "grand affair" and a "supreme show of chivalry and sportsmanship" with the Knight Sybil Decaut, a rising star in the League, taking a surprising win over the Grail Knight Henry d'Monfort, who appeared to be in good spirits despite the loss."
"Overall it was one of the highest rated opening events for the League, and many view it as a positive step for Bretonnia moving forward culturally. The League will now progress as normal, with a total of five major and fifteen minor tournaments planned before the season's Closing Event, which is to be held in New Haven, Capital of the Holy Britannian Empire on Earth 75136."
"In finance the Opening up of the deposits of Adamantum discussed yesterday by the New Republic of universe 789-341 has indeed caused a further increase in the Multiversal Stock Exchange, adding an extra two points, and bringing it to a record high of thirty points. For those unaware one point in the MSE's scoring system is worth a thousand in most others, making it equivalent to thirty thousand points in most other exchanges scales."
"Thank you for watching tonight's broadcast, I've been Randy, and have a good night."
Across the city, lights faded and noise lowered as most went to sleep, and those bound to the night, by quirk or obligation began to roam the streets.
AN2: it is happy news today, yay happiness!
ArsMagna1337
(Unverified Oracle) (Unverified Omake Machine)
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I wonder if the news will cover about a random spree of murders that involves a menacing guy in a lab coat (Evil Rick) and a child with an eyepatch (Evil Morty).
RandytheBlackKnight
That guy who sometimes does the things.
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Probably not, it's quite literally me writing down whatever thing I make up at around 5 or so in the afternoon and then stylizing it as a news report.
Report 3
RandytheBlackKnight
That guy who sometimes does the things.
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A dingy diner on an old and worn down space station was packed with customers of all sorts, from the humanlike to the indescribably alien, all chattering about until one insectoid person checked their watch, an antique Rolex, and clicked "Hey, can someone get the news on?"
The man behind the counter complied, and a multitude of ocular organs turned towards the screen hanging above him.
"Hello, and thank you watching tonight's broadcast, I'm Randy."
"Tonight's top story, a massive crime scandal is rocking the Palronian Trade Guild as charges of smuggling, bribery, drug trade, assassination, murder, and even illegal slave trading continue to pile up from various governments across the multiverse."
Beside the knight a picture of a red twelve pointed star with a stylized white arrow reaching up to it appeared.
"While not counted among the largest or wealthiest multiversal corporations, the Palronian Trade Guild is one of the oldest still in operation. Founded nearly three thousand standard years ago it has always prided on being, to quote their motto, "An honest and fair company" though the previously mentioned charges bring light to how far the company actually is from that ideal."
"The scandal first broke when a routine inspection of the freighter Dal Carit by the Terran Dominion of universe 9748 found several hundred people of various species and ages all chained together in a cramped hidden hold on the freighter, when confronted the captain attempted to self-destruct the vessel but was stopped by Dominion security forces. Emperor Valerian immediately ordered raids on all Palronian facilities in the Dominion, uncovering evidence of mass scale illicit operations throughout the multiverse. This information was forwarded to the relevant governments, and as many others as the Dominion could contact, leading to similar raids being launched, raids which had largely the same result."
"With mass arrests being made across the Open Multiverse, and with so many individuals facing charges by so many governments, the Multiversal Court of Nations is, for the first time in nearly seven hundred years, being reopened for criminal trials."
The company logo was replaced with the picture of a balding human male with sunken green eyes.
"Unfortunately the CEO of the Guild, Darak Hust, is currently still at large and is believed to be hiding in the Hutt Space of universe 65782. The Galactic Empire of that universe, who also have a warrant out for his arrest and have announced their participation in the Court, are currently in negotiations with the Hutts to secure Hust's extradition. Though some sources claim this is merely a delaying tactic while the Empire organizes a joint operation with the Alliance to restore the Republic to forcefully arrest Hust."
"This news has shocked many throughout the multiverse and has as a result caused the Multiversal Stock Exchange to fall a full four points, bringing it down from yesterday's high. With many analysts believing that it will likely fall further if the situation isn't quickly resolved."
"In other news, the conflict between the Church of the Roman Catapult, and their break away group the Church of the Holy Trebuchet that was previously reported on has unfortunately escalated, as militias on New Lemuria have answered the Catapope's call to arms, and attacked several Trebuchet churches killing at least seventy-five people. The Great Wolf of the Trebuchetists has in turn issued a call for crusade against the Catapultists and on New Lemuria this has only spurred more violence, with Trebuchetist militias retaliating against the ones who attacked their churches."
This time the picture became a graphic of a group of catapults and a trebuchet appearing to have a sort of medieval artillery duel.
"It briefly seemed as if the planet would break out into civil war, but the government has declared martial law in order to prevent the conflict from spreading, and that seems to have headed a proper war off, for now at least."
"In the meantime the Church of Madoka is attempting to mediate the conflict between the two other religious groups, a cause that is also being taken up by the Brotherhood of Nod, with Kane offering to host a meeting aimed at deescalating the situation at the highly secure Temple Prime complex in Nova Sarajevo. However, neither group has proven to be open to the offers yet."
"While the situation is still developing many fear that this conflict could spill over into a wide scale conflict across many nations, as the two religions are sizable minorities on many planets. Hopefully cooler heads will prevail before more lives are lost."
"And our last story for the night, R.O.B's a scary story, or nightmare reality? One man claims to have found definitive proof of the elusive beings. For those of you unaware a R.O.B an acronym of Random Omnipotent Being, is a God, Person or other thing that has obtained so much power that it simply plucks people out of Closed Universes, alters them down to their very souls and throws them in another for their own amusement. Most people simply dismiss them as nothing more than stories, or the result of mutations of the rantings of those with a poor relationship with particular gods."
The war became the term "R.O.B" in bold letters.
"Heinrich von Talicburg has in his recent book "The Touch of the Damned" claimed to have interviewed a person who was not only taken by a R.O.B but then subsequently killed it, even going so far as to include a picture of what von Talicburg claims to be the heart of the entity."
"We reached out to the researcher for an interview but he declined, saying he would be presenting all of his evidence at a conference at Proxima City University next week."
"That's all for tonight folks, thank you for watching and stay safe out there."
The diner immediately broke out into various conversations again at an even higher level of energy than before, and the channel was changed to a baseball match.
The man behind the counter complied, and a multitude of ocular organs turned towards the screen hanging above him.
"Hello, and thank you watching tonight's broadcast, I'm Randy."
"Tonight's top story, a massive crime scandal is rocking the Palronian Trade Guild as charges of smuggling, bribery, drug trade, assassination, murder, and even illegal slave trading continue to pile up from various governments across the multiverse."
Beside the knight a picture of a red twelve pointed star with a stylized white arrow reaching up to it appeared.
"While not counted among the largest or wealthiest multiversal corporations, the Palronian Trade Guild is one of the oldest still in operation. Founded nearly three thousand standard years ago it has always prided on being, to quote their motto, "An honest and fair company" though the previously mentioned charges bring light to how far the company actually is from that ideal."
"The scandal first broke when a routine inspection of the freighter Dal Carit by the Terran Dominion of universe 9748 found several hundred people of various species and ages all chained together in a cramped hidden hold on the freighter, when confronted the captain attempted to self-destruct the vessel but was stopped by Dominion security forces. Emperor Valerian immediately ordered raids on all Palronian facilities in the Dominion, uncovering evidence of mass scale illicit operations throughout the multiverse. This information was forwarded to the relevant governments, and as many others as the Dominion could contact, leading to similar raids being launched, raids which had largely the same result."
"With mass arrests being made across the Open Multiverse, and with so many individuals facing charges by so many governments, the Multiversal Court of Nations is, for the first time in nearly seven hundred years, being reopened for criminal trials."
The company logo was replaced with the picture of a balding human male with sunken green eyes.
"Unfortunately the CEO of the Guild, Darak Hust, is currently still at large and is believed to be hiding in the Hutt Space of universe 65782. The Galactic Empire of that universe, who also have a warrant out for his arrest and have announced their participation in the Court, are currently in negotiations with the Hutts to secure Hust's extradition. Though some sources claim this is merely a delaying tactic while the Empire organizes a joint operation with the Alliance to restore the Republic to forcefully arrest Hust."
"This news has shocked many throughout the multiverse and has as a result caused the Multiversal Stock Exchange to fall a full four points, bringing it down from yesterday's high. With many analysts believing that it will likely fall further if the situation isn't quickly resolved."
"In other news, the conflict between the Church of the Roman Catapult, and their break away group the Church of the Holy Trebuchet that was previously reported on has unfortunately escalated, as militias on New Lemuria have answered the Catapope's call to arms, and attacked several Trebuchet churches killing at least seventy-five people. The Great Wolf of the Trebuchetists has in turn issued a call for crusade against the Catapultists and on New Lemuria this has only spurred more violence, with Trebuchetist militias retaliating against the ones who attacked their churches."
This time the picture became a graphic of a group of catapults and a trebuchet appearing to have a sort of medieval artillery duel.
"It briefly seemed as if the planet would break out into civil war, but the government has declared martial law in order to prevent the conflict from spreading, and that seems to have headed a proper war off, for now at least."
"In the meantime the Church of Madoka is attempting to mediate the conflict between the two other religious groups, a cause that is also being taken up by the Brotherhood of Nod, with Kane offering to host a meeting aimed at deescalating the situation at the highly secure Temple Prime complex in Nova Sarajevo. However, neither group has proven to be open to the offers yet."
"While the situation is still developing many fear that this conflict could spill over into a wide scale conflict across many nations, as the two religions are sizable minorities on many planets. Hopefully cooler heads will prevail before more lives are lost."
"And our last story for the night, R.O.B's a scary story, or nightmare reality? One man claims to have found definitive proof of the elusive beings. For those of you unaware a R.O.B an acronym of Random Omnipotent Being, is a God, Person or other thing that has obtained so much power that it simply plucks people out of Closed Universes, alters them down to their very souls and throws them in another for their own amusement. Most people simply dismiss them as nothing more than stories, or the result of mutations of the rantings of those with a poor relationship with particular gods."
The war became the term "R.O.B" in bold letters.
"Heinrich von Talicburg has in his recent book "The Touch of the Damned" claimed to have interviewed a person who was not only taken by a R.O.B but then subsequently killed it, even going so far as to include a picture of what von Talicburg claims to be the heart of the entity."
"We reached out to the researcher for an interview but he declined, saying he would be presenting all of his evidence at a conference at Proxima City University next week."
"That's all for tonight folks, thank you for watching and stay safe out there."
The diner immediately broke out into various conversations again at an even higher level of energy than before, and the channel was changed to a baseball match.
da3monh0st3d
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I don't know, the children in Accelerando turned out "fine".
This is entertaining. I'll comment some more later on more than the first chapter.
This is entertaining. I'll comment some more later on more than the first chapter.
Reports 4 and 5
RandytheBlackKnight
That guy who sometimes does the things.
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2016
- Messages
- 1,944
- Likes received
- 13,473
A young witch looked into her scrying glass, hoping against hope that she'd crafted her new spell correctly, only to jump back in fright when the glass began to play music.
"Welcome to the Evening News, I'm Randy and thank you for choosing the Multiversal News Service."
"Tonight a special debate rages throughout the various militaries of the multiverse; Phosphex, an unforgivable war crime, or a necessary evil to combat aggressive foes such as the Flood and Borg? This has long been debated among the various nations of the multiverse, as the chemical burns through nearly anything and keeps burning for upto a minute and a half when left in a complete vacuum. Further large scale use of Phosphex wreaks untold havoc on a planet, leaving it unable to support life and extremely difficult to restore with all but the most advanced terraforming technology. Field reporters Yuko Kanae and Stephen Vatin have more from both sides of the argument."
In an organized and spartan office an aged dark skinned man in a white admiral's uniform sat with a well-dressed kitsune.
"Thank you, Randy; I'm here with Admiral John Brenham of the UNSC Navy. Admiral you've recently found yourself in the center of much of the renewed controversy involving the use of Phosphex weapons when you ordered a mass bombardment of the potential colony world of Benjamin's Reach due to a high level Flood infestation. What do you have to say on the matter?"
"I won't lie to you ma'am, personally I think that this stuff is about the single most horrifying weapon ever made, and that whatever bastard invented it damn well deserves to be burning in Hell. But against the Flood? It's the best weapon we've got. Glassing or Nuclear Bombardment will stop a lot of infections sure, but the parasite is stubborn, one missed crag or deep cave system and you might as well not have done anything. Phosphex though, Phosphex will reach those places, kill any spores or free floating S-cells, and there's nothing that will stop it."
"Many have brought up the potential risk to soldiers on the ground or even civilian populations in the area, you said it yourself, there's nothing that will stop it."
"Look I'm not saying we should break out the Phosphex bombs because some Brute pack or other decides to get uppity. Hell, if the Flood weren't a thing, if the Tyranids were more like the Zerg and the Borg willing to reason I'd be breaking down the doors demanding that anyone even thinking of using this stuff be court marshaled and shot. But the Flood does exist, the Tyranids aren't like the Zerg, and the Borg aren't reasonable. We need Phosphex to beat them, nothing else is anywhere near as effective and we can't afford to drag those fights out. Attrition is their friend, not ours." The Admiral sighed.
"I know what will happen if even one thing goes wrong with these weapons, it's a bad way to go. One of the worst, but it's not the worst, and the things we use it against? Those cause plenty worse deaths, maybe one day we'll beat them, and on that day I'll thank the Lord and destroy every last drop of Phosphex myself, but until then we can't afford to get rid of it, no one can."
Yuko nodded, "Thank you for your time Admiral Brenham. Stephen has more with the abolitionist perspective."
The scene switched again this time to a balcony overlooking a pristine city. A young looking woman in a Star Fleet officer's uniform sat at a table with a sharply dressed burnet man with deep violet eyes.
"Thank Yuko, with me is Admiral Valeria Greyson of Starfleet. Admiral Greyson, you are a firm believer that the production and use of Phosphex should be banned outright, is that correct?" Stephen asked.
"That's right, it is an abomination and its use is an unconscionable act of brutality." The Admiral spoke with a slight British tilt to her voice.
"Even in the face of threats like the Flood and Borg? As has been said many times, there are few weapons more effective and thus far none of them have been able to adapt any kind of effective defense against it."
The Admiral seemed to think for a second "I understand that many people are afraid, there's a lot to be afraid of in the multiverse, but the use of Phosphex, it goes against not just the Federation's ideals but the basic levels of decency and morality that even the Imperum and Batarians share. When the Imperium of Man first introduced Phosphex it was a last resort, when they gave the formula to others it was because they, we, were faced with near certain annihilation."
"Now it's everywhere, and everyone forgets what it represents. An act of desperation, a complete disregard for who and what we are, the use of Phosphex was crossing a line, one that should never, ever, have been crossed. We let fear rule us and went against everything we are, and we're still letting that fear rule us. The Flood, the Replicators, the Tyranids, the Borg, they've all been beaten before without Phosphex, without crossing that line. They can be beaten again, and we don't have to keep sacrificing our morals to do it. It's time we put a stop to this, before something happens that can't be fixed." She breathed a little heavier having said her peace.
"Thank you for your time ma'am, back to you Randy." Stephen closed the interview.
Once more the scene shifted to the knight. "And there it is folks the two sides of the argument, is Phosphex too horrifying to justify, or does its effectiveness outweigh the moral implications of its use? A debate that may never truly end as governments and militaries all across the multiverse look towards the future."
"This has been the Evening News, have a goodnight."
The witch looked at her glass askance, trying to process exactly what she'd just seen when the music came back before all that shown was her own reflection.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Icy winds battered the small isolated building, as many people filed in to take shelter from the cold. In a lonesome corner, a small television flickered on and began to show a program, unnoticed in the general chatter.
"Hello, I'm Randy and thank you for tuning into the evening news."
"Tonight's top story, the formally unofficial and disorganized Scythian Racing Circuit has officially become a legitimate sporting organization, with several contracts to broadcast their events and companies lining up to sponsor racers. While there have been several changes to the rules of the events, namely the removal of the "anything goes" rules when it comes to attacking opponents during the race, much will remain the same in the spirit of the original race."
A image of a flaming skull with black sunglasses, elongated canines and two scythes crossed behind it appeared on beside the knight.
"To clarify the Scythian Circuit started as a friendly completion between freighter pilots and quickly evolved into one of the largest unofficial space races in the Multiverse. The formula remains much the same, anyone can join the first "qualifier" race, and once they've finished it become confirmed for the season. And while contestants may no longer fire upon each other in the race, the general rules are the same. Each race consists of several circuits, which are simply smaller sublight races in a single solar system, once a circuit is completed by a contestant they then use their FTL drive to get to the next circuit. Each circuit will have a variety of obstacles and traps placed throughout to increase the difficulty. The winner is simply whoever finishes the race first."
"Certain standards of ship size and a comprehensive modification ban list have also been added to the rules in order to comply with the standards of governments hosting the races. Despite this many of the old guard have expressed excitement to see the Scythian Circuit become a legitimate racing organization. Field reporter Stephen Vatin has more."
The image shifted to show Stephen on a platform overlooking a large open hanger with a variety of space ships, ranging from one man fighter craft to light freighters the size of a small apartment home being worked on by their owners.
"Thank you Randy. As you can see behind me, there's no shortage of hopeful pilots hoping to win it big in the new season's qualifier next week, and most ratings analysts project that the event will break nearly every record for sporting event viewership."
He briefly stopped to allow a burst of ambient noise to subside.
"According to the race organizer Jane Hach, this is shaping up to be the Circuits biggest season yet; in fact if even a third of the potential racers here manage to finish the qualifier then it will be the double the current largest season in terms of racers. And surprisingly enough there doesn't seem to be any sort of resentment from the veteran racers, with one saying and I quote, "New guys are always a good time, and hardly anyone shot at each other anymore, anyways."
"Many systems are also clamoring to host a circuit for the increased tourism it will bring. Though the Circuit has apparently decided all the Races for the next three seasons in advance and has thus turned many down."
"Hopefully the first run of the Scythian Circuit as an official racing league will meet everyone's expectations. Back to you Randy."
The scene returned to the knight.
"Thank you Stephen. Onto economic news, The Multiversal Stock exchange has fallen a further two points as the Palorian CEO Darak Hurst is still at large. Many analysts fear that investors by start a mass selloff in fear of many governments passing punitive regulatory laws in response to the crimes of the Palorian Trade Guild. Such a buyout could start an economic domino effect and drive many nations into economic depression as both people and companies try to avoid losing everything."
"While many measures against such an event do exist, they have never been tested and several economic think tanks have stated that they would be insufficient to stop such an event from causing wide spread damage."
"Finally, the war between the Greater Galactic Reich and the Inter-solar Socalist Union has intensified and both nations are beginning to reach out to their allies in an attempt to gain the upper hand. So far however it seems the Reich holds the advantage, having recently announced victories in two major fleet engagements, a claim back by testimony from local civilian ships, the ISU has declined to comment on the matter."
"Things are not looking completely bad for the ISU however, as they have announced that they have begun the liberation of Nova Caucasia, a world that they were forced to leave in the hands of the Reich due to the armistice. As a result of this, it has become something of a symbol to both sides of the conflict, though it holds little actual strategic value beyond this. The Reich's Ministry of War says that they have no intention of allowing the world to fall back into the hands of the ISU and are sending reinforcements to the garrison army stationed there. "
"Many humanitarian aid organizations are gearing up to send supplies and personnel to help the civilians caught in the conflict zones, though several Sapient Rights organizations have raised concerns about the ISU and Reich blocking aid outright, as they nearly did when the war first broke out."
"That's all for tonight, thank you for watching."
The unattended television went dark, as it was unplugged to free up an outlet for a space heater.
AN: So I said this on SB yesterday but not here, but my internet went down yesterday so I'm posting yesterdays and todays in one post.
"Welcome to the Evening News, I'm Randy and thank you for choosing the Multiversal News Service."
"Tonight a special debate rages throughout the various militaries of the multiverse; Phosphex, an unforgivable war crime, or a necessary evil to combat aggressive foes such as the Flood and Borg? This has long been debated among the various nations of the multiverse, as the chemical burns through nearly anything and keeps burning for upto a minute and a half when left in a complete vacuum. Further large scale use of Phosphex wreaks untold havoc on a planet, leaving it unable to support life and extremely difficult to restore with all but the most advanced terraforming technology. Field reporters Yuko Kanae and Stephen Vatin have more from both sides of the argument."
In an organized and spartan office an aged dark skinned man in a white admiral's uniform sat with a well-dressed kitsune.
"Thank you, Randy; I'm here with Admiral John Brenham of the UNSC Navy. Admiral you've recently found yourself in the center of much of the renewed controversy involving the use of Phosphex weapons when you ordered a mass bombardment of the potential colony world of Benjamin's Reach due to a high level Flood infestation. What do you have to say on the matter?"
"I won't lie to you ma'am, personally I think that this stuff is about the single most horrifying weapon ever made, and that whatever bastard invented it damn well deserves to be burning in Hell. But against the Flood? It's the best weapon we've got. Glassing or Nuclear Bombardment will stop a lot of infections sure, but the parasite is stubborn, one missed crag or deep cave system and you might as well not have done anything. Phosphex though, Phosphex will reach those places, kill any spores or free floating S-cells, and there's nothing that will stop it."
"Many have brought up the potential risk to soldiers on the ground or even civilian populations in the area, you said it yourself, there's nothing that will stop it."
"Look I'm not saying we should break out the Phosphex bombs because some Brute pack or other decides to get uppity. Hell, if the Flood weren't a thing, if the Tyranids were more like the Zerg and the Borg willing to reason I'd be breaking down the doors demanding that anyone even thinking of using this stuff be court marshaled and shot. But the Flood does exist, the Tyranids aren't like the Zerg, and the Borg aren't reasonable. We need Phosphex to beat them, nothing else is anywhere near as effective and we can't afford to drag those fights out. Attrition is their friend, not ours." The Admiral sighed.
"I know what will happen if even one thing goes wrong with these weapons, it's a bad way to go. One of the worst, but it's not the worst, and the things we use it against? Those cause plenty worse deaths, maybe one day we'll beat them, and on that day I'll thank the Lord and destroy every last drop of Phosphex myself, but until then we can't afford to get rid of it, no one can."
Yuko nodded, "Thank you for your time Admiral Brenham. Stephen has more with the abolitionist perspective."
The scene switched again this time to a balcony overlooking a pristine city. A young looking woman in a Star Fleet officer's uniform sat at a table with a sharply dressed burnet man with deep violet eyes.
"Thank Yuko, with me is Admiral Valeria Greyson of Starfleet. Admiral Greyson, you are a firm believer that the production and use of Phosphex should be banned outright, is that correct?" Stephen asked.
"That's right, it is an abomination and its use is an unconscionable act of brutality." The Admiral spoke with a slight British tilt to her voice.
"Even in the face of threats like the Flood and Borg? As has been said many times, there are few weapons more effective and thus far none of them have been able to adapt any kind of effective defense against it."
The Admiral seemed to think for a second "I understand that many people are afraid, there's a lot to be afraid of in the multiverse, but the use of Phosphex, it goes against not just the Federation's ideals but the basic levels of decency and morality that even the Imperum and Batarians share. When the Imperium of Man first introduced Phosphex it was a last resort, when they gave the formula to others it was because they, we, were faced with near certain annihilation."
"Now it's everywhere, and everyone forgets what it represents. An act of desperation, a complete disregard for who and what we are, the use of Phosphex was crossing a line, one that should never, ever, have been crossed. We let fear rule us and went against everything we are, and we're still letting that fear rule us. The Flood, the Replicators, the Tyranids, the Borg, they've all been beaten before without Phosphex, without crossing that line. They can be beaten again, and we don't have to keep sacrificing our morals to do it. It's time we put a stop to this, before something happens that can't be fixed." She breathed a little heavier having said her peace.
"Thank you for your time ma'am, back to you Randy." Stephen closed the interview.
Once more the scene shifted to the knight. "And there it is folks the two sides of the argument, is Phosphex too horrifying to justify, or does its effectiveness outweigh the moral implications of its use? A debate that may never truly end as governments and militaries all across the multiverse look towards the future."
"This has been the Evening News, have a goodnight."
The witch looked at her glass askance, trying to process exactly what she'd just seen when the music came back before all that shown was her own reflection.
Icy winds battered the small isolated building, as many people filed in to take shelter from the cold. In a lonesome corner, a small television flickered on and began to show a program, unnoticed in the general chatter.
"Hello, I'm Randy and thank you for tuning into the evening news."
"Tonight's top story, the formally unofficial and disorganized Scythian Racing Circuit has officially become a legitimate sporting organization, with several contracts to broadcast their events and companies lining up to sponsor racers. While there have been several changes to the rules of the events, namely the removal of the "anything goes" rules when it comes to attacking opponents during the race, much will remain the same in the spirit of the original race."
A image of a flaming skull with black sunglasses, elongated canines and two scythes crossed behind it appeared on beside the knight.
"To clarify the Scythian Circuit started as a friendly completion between freighter pilots and quickly evolved into one of the largest unofficial space races in the Multiverse. The formula remains much the same, anyone can join the first "qualifier" race, and once they've finished it become confirmed for the season. And while contestants may no longer fire upon each other in the race, the general rules are the same. Each race consists of several circuits, which are simply smaller sublight races in a single solar system, once a circuit is completed by a contestant they then use their FTL drive to get to the next circuit. Each circuit will have a variety of obstacles and traps placed throughout to increase the difficulty. The winner is simply whoever finishes the race first."
"Certain standards of ship size and a comprehensive modification ban list have also been added to the rules in order to comply with the standards of governments hosting the races. Despite this many of the old guard have expressed excitement to see the Scythian Circuit become a legitimate racing organization. Field reporter Stephen Vatin has more."
The image shifted to show Stephen on a platform overlooking a large open hanger with a variety of space ships, ranging from one man fighter craft to light freighters the size of a small apartment home being worked on by their owners.
"Thank you Randy. As you can see behind me, there's no shortage of hopeful pilots hoping to win it big in the new season's qualifier next week, and most ratings analysts project that the event will break nearly every record for sporting event viewership."
He briefly stopped to allow a burst of ambient noise to subside.
"According to the race organizer Jane Hach, this is shaping up to be the Circuits biggest season yet; in fact if even a third of the potential racers here manage to finish the qualifier then it will be the double the current largest season in terms of racers. And surprisingly enough there doesn't seem to be any sort of resentment from the veteran racers, with one saying and I quote, "New guys are always a good time, and hardly anyone shot at each other anymore, anyways."
"Many systems are also clamoring to host a circuit for the increased tourism it will bring. Though the Circuit has apparently decided all the Races for the next three seasons in advance and has thus turned many down."
"Hopefully the first run of the Scythian Circuit as an official racing league will meet everyone's expectations. Back to you Randy."
The scene returned to the knight.
"Thank you Stephen. Onto economic news, The Multiversal Stock exchange has fallen a further two points as the Palorian CEO Darak Hurst is still at large. Many analysts fear that investors by start a mass selloff in fear of many governments passing punitive regulatory laws in response to the crimes of the Palorian Trade Guild. Such a buyout could start an economic domino effect and drive many nations into economic depression as both people and companies try to avoid losing everything."
"While many measures against such an event do exist, they have never been tested and several economic think tanks have stated that they would be insufficient to stop such an event from causing wide spread damage."
"Finally, the war between the Greater Galactic Reich and the Inter-solar Socalist Union has intensified and both nations are beginning to reach out to their allies in an attempt to gain the upper hand. So far however it seems the Reich holds the advantage, having recently announced victories in two major fleet engagements, a claim back by testimony from local civilian ships, the ISU has declined to comment on the matter."
"Things are not looking completely bad for the ISU however, as they have announced that they have begun the liberation of Nova Caucasia, a world that they were forced to leave in the hands of the Reich due to the armistice. As a result of this, it has become something of a symbol to both sides of the conflict, though it holds little actual strategic value beyond this. The Reich's Ministry of War says that they have no intention of allowing the world to fall back into the hands of the ISU and are sending reinforcements to the garrison army stationed there. "
"Many humanitarian aid organizations are gearing up to send supplies and personnel to help the civilians caught in the conflict zones, though several Sapient Rights organizations have raised concerns about the ISU and Reich blocking aid outright, as they nearly did when the war first broke out."
"That's all for tonight, thank you for watching."
The unattended television went dark, as it was unplugged to free up an outlet for a space heater.
AN: So I said this on SB yesterday but not here, but my internet went down yesterday so I'm posting yesterdays and todays in one post.
Report 6
RandytheBlackKnight
That guy who sometimes does the things.
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2016
- Messages
- 1,944
- Likes received
- 13,473
AN: So before we start I'd just like to apologize for missing the past few days, the first day I just spent all day shooting the shit with some friends on discord, then I got sick, and have been basically nonfunctional until today, and my dad's girlfriend had to go to the ER. She's fine though thankfully. So apology/explanation out of the way, have more cancer.
The observatory's lights flickered, as a group of excited scientists waited around a screen with baited breath, looking to catch the signal again. Just as they were about to give up, an image appeared accompanied by music, and they all cheered with triumph.
"Hello and welcome to the Evening News, I'm Randy and thank you for tuning in."
The Knight sat somewhat slumped down in shit chair, as opposed to his normal ridged posture.
"Tonight's top story, the Multiversal Grifball League has begun its One Hundredth Season, with its final game scheduled for the organization's Centennial Anniversary, while the sport was once in decline in terms of popularity it has enjoyed a recent resurgence among the younger demographics of the Open Multiverse. The MGL has a long and storied history and its sport and even longer one. Field Reporter Yuko Kanae has more."
The image shifted to a large Krogan in sealed armor, and the ever professional reporter, suit neat and tails kept out of the way.
"Thank you Randy. I'm here with Predtar Varn. Mr. Predtar, you've been part of the League since its founding, and playing the sport even longer correct?"
"Hahaha, yep. Been in the sport for near two hundred years now, started way back in the Citadel Grifball League before that merged with the Klingon Grifball Arenas to become the United Grifball League, it was about twenty or so years after that all the big ones merged into the Multiversal League."
"And was that merger a large shift in how games were organized?"
"Not really, most of the Leagues were all running the same rules anyways; it just took away the hassle that came with organizing games across them. Everything just, got easier as time went on, lotta the early disagreements about the rules stopped mattering as much." The Krogan explained.
"Did that have anything to do with the sudden drop in interest in the sport?" the reporter asked.
"Hit it right on the head. See round bout, oh ninety seven, ninety-nine, people started to lose interest in it, it was a simple game but people were overcomplicating it, there were some scandals too, and that's round about when the knights all got together to organize their thing with the Martial Arts league. That got people's attention. Nothing like people beating the crap out of each other to entertain the masses, somehow we managed to screw that up."
"So a lot of the Leagues started to lose money and teams, less teams meant less games, less games meant even less money. So they started combining to get more teams and more money. Kept everyone afloat I kept hitting people and planting bombs, and everyone decided to finally sit down and hash out what the rules were."
"And the current rules are the result of that agreement then?" Yuko asked with a slight tilt of her head.
The Krogan burst out laughing, "Hello no! Those meetings devolved into endless arguing so quickly I'm surprised nobody ended up dying."
"What really ended up happing was after months on getting absolutely nothing done, one of the vets, a Rodian named who called himself Leet, found the original rules of the game. Well, he didn't find it specifically; he paid some guys to do that for him."
"The original rules?" She asked
"Yep, Leet got his hands on the official rule book for the American Grifball League of America. Anyways Leet comes and finds me, shows me the book and says, "Those idiots aren't getting anything done, how about we convince them?" Course I wasn't about to say no especially when he gave me the rules, crazy shit in that rule book let me tell you. Solid rules, but they accounted for some really weird contingencies, people being punted between dimensions and stuff."
"Really? How did they account for that kind of thing?"
"Mostly through teleporters and an ability to arbitrarily kill people and bring them back to life. Even had it standardized too, you died in the match; you came back exactly three seconds later. Anyways, where was I? Oh right, Leet. So me and Leet gathered some other players and beat our way through security to the bigwig's conference room. Then Leet just throws the book at some guy and screams "READ!" at the top of his lungs. Next week we had a universal rule set. Hehe."
"After that things went a lot more smoothly and they formed to MGL."
"Thank you Mr. Predtar. As you can see, the MGL has a very colorful history behind it and its dedicated fans and players. Back to you Randy."
"Thank you Yuko."
The screen shifted back to the knight
"Our next story is a resolution to the Darak Hust situation. While the Ruling Council of the Hutts agreed to give up Hust, CEO of the Palorian Trade Guild, his host, Prada the Hutt, refused on the grounds that he was giving Hust political asylum. Later that night, a joint operation between Storm Commandos and their Alliance counterparts was launched to capture the fugitive executive. This operation went flawlessly, and Hust was taken without incident, he is currently being held on an undisclosed Imperial Station while he awaits trial."
"Prada attempted to launch a pursuit of the team, but was stopped by the Hutts themselves, who have begun in the words of their representative Jabba, "tear down everything Prada has built for this betrayal of all our trusts." The trial of Prada the Hutt will be an internal Hutt matter according to sources within the Galatic Empire."
"There is no official date set for when the Palorian tribunal is to begin, but most analysts put it at no more than two and a half months."
"This has been the Evening News, on behalf of the Multiversal News Service I thank you for tuning in."
As the outro played the team of scientists became even more ecstatic, already planning on sharing the method to catch the signal with as many other facilities as possible, bright with the hope that the revelations of such a broadcast would benefit all of humanity.
AN2: Seven hundred words about Grifball, as I said on the Fiction discussion discord, what the fuck am I doing with my life? Well hope you guys enjoyed regardless.
The observatory's lights flickered, as a group of excited scientists waited around a screen with baited breath, looking to catch the signal again. Just as they were about to give up, an image appeared accompanied by music, and they all cheered with triumph.
"Hello and welcome to the Evening News, I'm Randy and thank you for tuning in."
The Knight sat somewhat slumped down in shit chair, as opposed to his normal ridged posture.
"Tonight's top story, the Multiversal Grifball League has begun its One Hundredth Season, with its final game scheduled for the organization's Centennial Anniversary, while the sport was once in decline in terms of popularity it has enjoyed a recent resurgence among the younger demographics of the Open Multiverse. The MGL has a long and storied history and its sport and even longer one. Field Reporter Yuko Kanae has more."
The image shifted to a large Krogan in sealed armor, and the ever professional reporter, suit neat and tails kept out of the way.
"Thank you Randy. I'm here with Predtar Varn. Mr. Predtar, you've been part of the League since its founding, and playing the sport even longer correct?"
"Hahaha, yep. Been in the sport for near two hundred years now, started way back in the Citadel Grifball League before that merged with the Klingon Grifball Arenas to become the United Grifball League, it was about twenty or so years after that all the big ones merged into the Multiversal League."
"And was that merger a large shift in how games were organized?"
"Not really, most of the Leagues were all running the same rules anyways; it just took away the hassle that came with organizing games across them. Everything just, got easier as time went on, lotta the early disagreements about the rules stopped mattering as much." The Krogan explained.
"Did that have anything to do with the sudden drop in interest in the sport?" the reporter asked.
"Hit it right on the head. See round bout, oh ninety seven, ninety-nine, people started to lose interest in it, it was a simple game but people were overcomplicating it, there were some scandals too, and that's round about when the knights all got together to organize their thing with the Martial Arts league. That got people's attention. Nothing like people beating the crap out of each other to entertain the masses, somehow we managed to screw that up."
"So a lot of the Leagues started to lose money and teams, less teams meant less games, less games meant even less money. So they started combining to get more teams and more money. Kept everyone afloat I kept hitting people and planting bombs, and everyone decided to finally sit down and hash out what the rules were."
"And the current rules are the result of that agreement then?" Yuko asked with a slight tilt of her head.
The Krogan burst out laughing, "Hello no! Those meetings devolved into endless arguing so quickly I'm surprised nobody ended up dying."
"What really ended up happing was after months on getting absolutely nothing done, one of the vets, a Rodian named who called himself Leet, found the original rules of the game. Well, he didn't find it specifically; he paid some guys to do that for him."
"The original rules?" She asked
"Yep, Leet got his hands on the official rule book for the American Grifball League of America. Anyways Leet comes and finds me, shows me the book and says, "Those idiots aren't getting anything done, how about we convince them?" Course I wasn't about to say no especially when he gave me the rules, crazy shit in that rule book let me tell you. Solid rules, but they accounted for some really weird contingencies, people being punted between dimensions and stuff."
"Really? How did they account for that kind of thing?"
"Mostly through teleporters and an ability to arbitrarily kill people and bring them back to life. Even had it standardized too, you died in the match; you came back exactly three seconds later. Anyways, where was I? Oh right, Leet. So me and Leet gathered some other players and beat our way through security to the bigwig's conference room. Then Leet just throws the book at some guy and screams "READ!" at the top of his lungs. Next week we had a universal rule set. Hehe."
"After that things went a lot more smoothly and they formed to MGL."
"Thank you Mr. Predtar. As you can see, the MGL has a very colorful history behind it and its dedicated fans and players. Back to you Randy."
"Thank you Yuko."
The screen shifted back to the knight
"Our next story is a resolution to the Darak Hust situation. While the Ruling Council of the Hutts agreed to give up Hust, CEO of the Palorian Trade Guild, his host, Prada the Hutt, refused on the grounds that he was giving Hust political asylum. Later that night, a joint operation between Storm Commandos and their Alliance counterparts was launched to capture the fugitive executive. This operation went flawlessly, and Hust was taken without incident, he is currently being held on an undisclosed Imperial Station while he awaits trial."
"Prada attempted to launch a pursuit of the team, but was stopped by the Hutts themselves, who have begun in the words of their representative Jabba, "tear down everything Prada has built for this betrayal of all our trusts." The trial of Prada the Hutt will be an internal Hutt matter according to sources within the Galatic Empire."
"There is no official date set for when the Palorian tribunal is to begin, but most analysts put it at no more than two and a half months."
"This has been the Evening News, on behalf of the Multiversal News Service I thank you for tuning in."
As the outro played the team of scientists became even more ecstatic, already planning on sharing the method to catch the signal with as many other facilities as possible, bright with the hope that the revelations of such a broadcast would benefit all of humanity.
AN2: Seven hundred words about Grifball, as I said on the Fiction discussion discord, what the fuck am I doing with my life? Well hope you guys enjoyed regardless.