What do you do after saving the world? After stopping an existential threat, after preventing...
Follow along with the video below to see how to install our site as a web app on your home screen.
Note: This feature may not be available in some browsers.
User | Total |
---|---|
ellf | 2 |
I'll be honest chief. Changing taytay into a duck is the breaking point for me. It's really wierd and I was interested but that last detail kills it for me. I wish you luck in writing!
Wait, didn't Della lose her leg in the spaceship crash? Why would they find her leg AGAIN in the car crash?
The woman goes through legs like Taylor goes through arms, is what you're saying.
Honestly, the duck transformation has to happen because having a human in that world just doesn't work.
Thats whats bothering me. There's not enough changes to account for this plot twist, not enough knock-on effects that would logically occur from this one difference.
To be honest, thats fine with me. When in Rome and all that.
Whats more inmersion breaking for me is the Annette is Delia thing. Now, looking back, you foreshadowed this twist when Taylor was talking about her mom, and when talking about the leg left behind in the car crash. Thats good wrinting.
But, well...you ever read one of those terrible Harry Potter and Naruto crossovers that treats Chakra and magic as the same type of energy, despite all the metaphysical difference between the two? And it pulls you out of the story if you bother to think about it?
Same feeling I get when reading this twist. Don't have a specific reason that comes to mind, just a feeling of 'this feels off'.
Hmm...
I think it's because by doing this, you are effectively grafting pieces of Annette's character onto Della, all for the sake of explaining why Taylor got turned into a duck, and giving her something familiar to latch onto. And that...doesn't feel right to me.
The more I think about it, the more it doesn't make sense to me that Della could have lived Annette's life: they are too different from each other. Della, for all her strengths, is repeatedly shown to be irresponsible and hungry for adventure. She's trying to be better for her kids, but if she had been Annette, she wouldn't need to, because she would have had experience. And if she had been Annette the whole time she was gone, Taylor would have lived a drastically different childhood, simply because Della would not have settled into a suburban lifestyle. She's too much of an adventurer for that. And Duckburg is too weird to be considered normal suburban life.
Thats whats bothering me. There's not enough changes to account for this plot twist, not enough knock-on effects that would logically occur from this one difference. It's like one of those stories that insists that everything is the same except for this one thing, not realizing that causality does not function in a vacuum: changes beget changes, nothing exists in isolation.
Now, if Della Duck was some sort of otherdimensional counterpart to Annette Herbert, instead of being the same person, it wouldn't be so immersion breaking. Having Della sound the same as Taylor's mother would be am excellent source of emotional conflict for both of them. Here's another child she left without a mother due to citcustanes beyond her control, except this one had to grow up without her there.
And it would explain why Taylor looks like Della just as well the explaination you used: because she's the daughter of another version of her.
Still, it's your story. I just hope it doesn't get bogged down with dealing with all the emotional baggage Taylor has concering this revelation.
A tearful reunion is always nice, and now I am immensely curious how Taylor can clearly understand Donald. Is this a powers thing?
Honestly, I see your concerns and understand them, but as DarwenGwein has said, not all has been revealed yet. There are changes Della has gone through purely because of her life as Annette during the month she was missing. She's only been back for two weeks, and Taylor's now here. The actual changes that Della has had, along with the changes for Taylor due to Annette being Della are things that would be revealed over time. You can't expect an info dump to happen within the first two chapters. It's not good writing for that to happen.