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Only Human (Goddess of Victory NIKKE SI)

Reader mode
That... seems a fairly accurate response to someone learning the object of hate that has driven them their entire lives turns out to be a lie. Dorothy has built EVERYTHING around this idea, this hate.

And building yourself around hatred doesn't end well. Nor is it conducive to making and keeping friends or lovers.

It burns you alive, usually from the inside out.

Hopefully, some way, some how, she'll find a way back to what Joe and the rest remember.
 
Chapter 91 - The Centre of Attention
===
Chapter 91 - The Centre of Attention
===

Staring with no small amount of confusion, Joe blinked at the sight of Sunny in the middle of being swarmed by a gaggle of other mass-produced Tetra Line Nikkes in the Command Centre common room. The blonde was visibly flustered, a decidedly uncharacteristic rosy hue tinting her fair cheeks as she attempted to shrink in on herself in the midst of all the attention being poured upon her.

That caught the Commander quite off-guard, to say the least. Mia and Cammie seemed bemused by Sunny's predicament, while Anis, the Carronades, and Wardress were nowhere to be seen. The Command Centre had never been so stuffed full… And it was mildly amusing from Joe's point of view that he was standing at the edge of a sea of beautiful women, yet still he saw clean over the heads of even the tallest among the present Nikkes.

Women were typically short, yes, but damn, the constant reminder of how tiny Nikkes were was wild. Asian women were really small on average, but the Ark's population demographics weren't skewed that heavily towards Asians from what Joe could see. That even considering how instrumental South Korea was in the Ark's creation.

At any rate, the last time he'd set eyes on Sunny, she was in an induced coma, waiting to be shipped back to the Ark to have her totalled legs replaced. Relieved to see her in a better state, Joe started off towards her, ready to begin weaving between the girls-

"-Um," Rapi called out in a hushed voice, stopping short of reaching out to take a hold of his sleeve, the man didn't pause, as it hadn't been clear that she was trying to catch Joe's attention specifically.

So, the man started to make his way to the orange and black-clad iDoll, weaving his way through the crowd—

"It's him!"

Only to halt at having a particular Nikke jab her finger out at him in wide-eyed recognition, followed by every eye in the room landing squarely on the lone Commander. It was difficult to imagine she had been calling out anyone else, given that he was the only man in the Outpost, save for Mustang or Andersen's rare and decidedly unadvertised visits.

There was a long moment of silence as all of the Nikkes just stared up at him, leaving the burly figure feeling more than a little on the back foot.

However, Sunny lightly fretting in the midst of the silence caught his attention again. With a small sigh at the attention being focused upon him, Joe continued to advance upon the twintailed iDoll, who didn't exactly look happy that all eyes shifted off of her, only to have the Commander move to bring said attention right back to her at once.

But, given what had happened when he'd last seen her… "Are you alright, Sunny?" He asked, coming to a stop next to the diminutive blonde.

She let out a low whine as murmurs broke out around the room, though Joe kept his attention fixed squarely on the cyberpunk supersoldier. "...M'fine, Commander," she replied quietly, her own gaze locked on the floor upon which Joe stood.

He wasn't entirely surprised. Sunny was doom-and-gloom at the best of times, so it stood to reason that she'd hardly be particularly cheerful while being the centre of a packed room's attention.

Letting out a shallow breath, the man reached over and set a hand on Sunny's slight shoulder—typically encased in heavy armour when prepared for combat—giving her a gentle smile. "Good. You were really badly hurt protecting me out there. I was concerned about how you were holding up. I'm glad you're okay, and thank you for putting yourself in such incredible danger for my sake," he said with a grateful little smile.

As Sunny's blush intensified all the further at his words, they were quickly followed by a cascade of coos and girlish whines of glee.

"It's true! He's so nice!"

"A good Commander that really cares about Nikkes… Is this a dream?"

"I can't believe it! Can I transfer to the Outpost?"

"Isn't it called Shangri-La now?"

"I'll call it Heaven if it means getting to work for someone that isn't a heartless jerk!"

As the inter-Nikke rabble began steadily building into a fever pitch, Joe felt his smile become strained. He, unfortunately, did as was usual for him, and didn't fully think his actions through before committing to them. Thus, deciding that it might be best to beat a hasty retreat, lest he find himself swarmed by needy Nikkes desperate for competent and considerate command, he opted to quickly wrap up the interaction with the lady of the hour.

"You can take some time off after that last operation, alright, Sunny? You worked hard, so consider some leave a reward for your hard work," he asserted with a single squeeze of the blonde's shoulder, letting go as he presented an appreciative grin her way. The most minute of nods was what he received by way of reply from the little, tomato-red lady, and thus, he decided to set off to head off to his office.

That, and desperately not let the STARES and CHITTERING affect him too visibly. A sea of iDolls all hyperfocused on him, eyes glimmering with wonder and awe at the unfathomable idea of a Commander that simply wasn't a stupid piece of shit. It would have been upsetting, had Joe not been, well, so terribly overwhelmed by having so many very pretty and beautiful women looking at him the way they were.

Rapi, meanwhile, was looking at the man like he was an idiot; to which, honestly, he kind of was given how he probably could have waited for a quieter and more private moment to address what had happened with Sunny. Though, in all fairness, Rapi's expression was more half acknowledging that he was kind of a dumbass, but also happy to see him making an active effort to be decent to one of the girls under his command.

Cinderella's gaze was far and away more fixed entirely on satisfied pride. Every little showing of Joe going out of his way to reach out to the girls around him did wonders to show that he was improving: he might've sat around on his hands waiting for Sunny to approach him before. All the while feeling sorry for himself, no less.

Another step taken towards being who he used to be. That made Cinderella and Rapi's smiles and pride feel incredibly earned. Thus, despite himself, he couldn't help but feel his own chest swell at the looks he was receiving from the two girls. This alone was plenty of incentive for him to put in the effort to keep doing better.

The murmurs intensified as Joe left the common room with Cinderella and Rapi flanking his either side, the three stepping into the elevator and riding up to the penthouse suite in comfortable silence together.

Until Cinderella reached out and hit the button to stop at the floor housing the officer's quarters. "Got something else to do?" The Commander inquired, glancing over at the platinumette as he did so.

"To change into something more casual," the blue-eyed beauty noted in her dignified tone of voice. "As comfortable as I am with my bodysuit, having options is freeing in its own way, after so many decades of wearing nothing but my second skin—save for when I would strip to clean myself and my suit in a river or stream, at least." Her gaze drifted off, and she seemed to focus on some unseen sight in an equally unseen distance. Closing her eyes, a small smile played across her features. "Such moments were freeing in their own right, I must admit…"

Joe blinked, and at once had to fight his mind's eye attempting to immediately conjure images of Cinderella flying around, completely naked on the surface. Granted, she was Andersen's daughter, and had inherited a lot of his particular quirks when it came to body shame—or rather, a lack thereof—but she'd never crossed the line into outright exhibitionism like Andersen was all too prone to back in the day-

Having reminded himself of that time Andersen tried to waltz around the Avenger in nothing but a banana hammock, his officer's cap and shutter shades, with his ID clipped to the crotch of the bathing suit which left damn near nothing to the imagination, Joe found himself quickly unflustered. A horrible reminder that thinking unsexy thoughts often worked.

Then it became funny, considering the reminder that finding Andersen giving the entire crew an unsolicited Chippendales show was how they discovered that Cinderella had a twin mattress-sized novelty flip-flop sandal in her room. A giant sandal which existed for the express purpose of breaking out la gran chancla when Andersen pissed her off, and needed a reminder that her mother was Puerto Rican, and she was a super-soldier with super strength.

Christ, that chase sequence was a sight which was as hilarious as it was horrifying-

"Y-you ran around on the surface completely naked!?" Rapi—hand slapping over her mouth in open shock as her eyes went wide—unfortunately, brought Joe right back to being flustered by putting that thought in his head again.

"Occasionally," Cinderella noted matter-of-factually as the elevator came to a stop, opening to reveal the hallway leading to the rooms of the remnants of Goddess. "Particularly once I'd finished washing my bodysuit," she stated as she ran the tips of her fingers down the length of her torso, tracing the skin-tight bodyglove hugging her curvaceous figure for emphasis. "Flying while holding it was the quickest way to dry it out swiftly, after all."

Rapi had turned bright red, staring at her fellow Grimms' body with wide, unblinking eyes. Joe, in turn, kept his eyes locked forward on the closed elevator doors as he did his damned best to think unsexy thoughts, rather than imagine Cinderella flying about completely nude, which she affirmed she absolutely did.

"T-that must have been…" Rapi's voice became shaky, her gaze remaining fixed on the stark woman's figure. "Q-quite the sight to see…"

Joe blinked, then he remembered. Oh. Right. Rapi was also into girls, wasn't she? Wait, what the fuck was he wondering about, he'd lost track of how many times he'd been doing something at his desk, only for her to strut up behind him and announce her presence by encircling her arms around his head and pulling one of her nudie mags right into his face, because she was such a tomboy that she behaved more like a horny guy than the actual resident horny guys did. "'Check it out, this chick's bobbers are huuuge, ain't that hot?'" Shit like that among the tamest comments she'd make, by a wide margin.

To say nothing of all the threesomes she doggedly attempted to get started with himself, Dorothy, Rapunzel, Cinderella— It was just Snow White she didn't creep on, actually, given the age gap between the squad's youngest and everyone else, wasn't it? Hell, she'd even tried more than once to entice a deeply unimpressed Scarlet…

It was that which caused Joe to fully remember that Rapi, back in the day as Red Hood, had been more than a little perverted, actually.

Well, it wasn't as though she was still like that, right? Her mind switch and the time spent as a member of Absolute seemed to have matured her quite a bit- Joe thought, only to notice out of his peripheral vision that Rapi was still flagrantly staring at Cinderella's chest even as her entire face lit up with a blush. To which Cinderella was smugly preening at the undivided attention.

The Commander, at once, felt deeply concerned, his gaze snapping between the two women with no small amount of mounting worry. The only reason he hadn't already slept with Rapi not so long ago was because his concussion had denied them both the chance to jump on the opportunity. Cinderella had also just… She didn't beat around the bush; she was in love with him, and clearly actively sought a very, very serious relationship with him.

Cinderella was just enjoying the attention she was receiving from Rapi, because she had a vain streak she shared with her father, right? She didn't think that Rapi's stare was openly and unabashedly lecherous, right?

As if his potential love life wasn't complicated enough as it was, with Marian- And maybe Privaty, in the picture too, come to think of it…

The elevator dinged, beginning to close again, to which Cinderella reached out and caught the door, humming as it reliably opened again. "Anyways, I will get changed and rejoin you in your room, my Prince," she smiled broadly at Joe, then presented a similar smile to a still blushing Rapi.

With her typical distinctive grace, the silver-haired beauty stepped out of the lift with an attention-grabbing sashay that firmly reminded Joe that her bodysuit was designed as such to leave her entire backside damn near wholly bare at a glance—the back was actually covered in glossy, if wholly transparent material. Yet functionally, the suit was designed to create the illusion that Cinderella was walking around in a thong with a transparent microskirt adorned with Petrine crosses, and thigh-high boots.

The most powerful living Nikke disappeared into her room, and after a moment of silence, the elevator dinged again—only for Rapi to reach out and catch it once more, quickly stepping out of it herself with a shuddering huff.

"-Rapi?" Joe inquired aloud.

"I just-" the blonde started, her voice as shaky as her legs seemed to suddenly be. "I-I need to do something, I'll catch up in a bit!" With that, she took off to her own quarters at a light run.

The man blinked as the door once more closed, this time actually being allowed to do so, before he quickly found himself on the top floor, moving for his own suite with a sigh and a shrug of his shoulders. She must have had to use the washroom or something.

As Joe moved for his desk to look over his work documents—eyes momentarily catching on the old Marlin lever-action now occupying the gun rack First Affection once claimed—his personal gold-plated Tetra Line phone started to buzz where it sat on the desk; Joe only took his bulletproof Elysion phone into the field, after all.

Lifting the phone which automatically unlocked upon detecting his biometrics, he found that he was being messaged by Mustang. [Ah, my friend! So many requests from my little iDolls to transfer to the newly christened Shangri-La—a perfect name for a paradise for Nikkes I might add—in the wake of seeing with their own eyes that the Commander of Counters is truly a kind and caring man…]

The audacious CEO tacked a single inquisitive sentence on to end his cheering paragraph.

[My poor, perfect girls may rely upon being taken care of by the Ark's number one Commander, yes?]

The automatic translator Rapi had directed Joe to install ages ago was really pulling its weight. Mustang was actually understandable now, thankfully. Thus, the Commander replied in text. [Let me check with Mighty Tools to see how the housing project is coming along before I commit to anything.]

He, of course, had no issues whatsoever with having Shangri-La basically become a Tetra Line colony, given the close ties he had with Mustang and that he knew any girls tied to him could be trusted more than most others. The Commander didn't want to leave the girls all packed into the communal barracks like sardines, however.

The residential district apartments might have been small and tightly packed together, almost being identical to metropolitan Japanese units in layout, but they were private quarters Nikkes would have all to themselves regardless. Speaking from experience, even living in one's own shoebox was preferable to sharing a hostel with everyone else.

Mustang's reply came quickly. [Individual domiciles for every Nikke that works for him? Resplendent! Absolute perfection! My girls shall all flourish under your care, my glorious friend! They shall know true happiness for the first time in so very long!]

Yeah, well, that was the very least they deserved. At any rate, Joe shot a message to the Mighty Tools group chat Liter preferred to use for official communications for convenience's sake, and the foreman replied rapidly.

Joe grimaced, and took a moment to parse what she'd said. Liter had abominable texting habits, making it difficult to actually read what she typed at a glance. However…

He replied to Mustang. [It looks like we could accept a handful of new squads with the apartments Mighty Tools has finished already. There's also a fair amount of free bunk space in the Command Centre barracks if anyone is willing to live communally in the interim between buildings being finished.]

A few more notifications pinged to alert him to Liter sending him more messages, but he was distracted by the CEO's immediate reply.

[Magnificent!] Mustang eagerly declared. [I shall let my poor girls know at once!]

Joe let out a small huff of satisfaction, a little lopsided grin finding purchase on his features as it registered to him that yeah, he was already having a positive effect on the lives of these Nikkes. It was encouraging, considering how the girls would be able to live in Shangri-La without worrying about discrimination for once in their lives.

All the more reason to double down and do all he could for these girls that sacrificed so much for mankind. Let them be happy! Let them know joy! Shangri-La, where Nikkes are recognized as the Goddesses of Victory they are!

…Hold up, shit, that would make for a good marketing line. In fact… Joe quickly typed that sentiment down, sending it to Mustang in quotes.

[PERFECTION!] The CEO replied in all caps, clearly approving heartily. [Your sentiment is beautiful! I will forward it to Andersen to replace the woefully inaccurate signs he presumptively had produced for Shangri-La ahead of time at once!]

Wait, what? Andersen had signs for the Outpost produced before Joe had actually confirmed its official new name to anyone? What had he put on them then-?

His thoughts were cut off as the hallway door slid open, Cinderella's big blue eye immediately locking onto the Commander as she stepped into the suite with a sensual sashay. "What do you think of my new outfit, my Prince?" She smugly asked.

She knew full well, of course, given that Joe had loudly dropped his phone on the desktop and let out a strained, hurgling cry the instant he'd set eyes on her. After all…

Holy underboob, Batman!

Cinderella was wearing a perilously high-cut cropped grey turtleneck sweater adorned with a white pleather choker and a harness strap between her chest and clavicle. A fashionable loose, baggy white jacket with black accents hung loose off of her shoulders. A high-waisted white miniskirt kept secure with a tied ribbon belt adorned her midsection, while her thigh was decorated with a random thigh strap which looked halfway between being a lone garterstrap and a pistol harness, worn under her skirt. There was nothing attached to the thigh strap, so it was clearly just there for aesthetics.

The blue-eyed beauty would have easily blended into the Ark, dressed as she was. Cyberpunk fashion was common down there, and she looked pretty cyberpunk with this new outfit.

The white-clad woman approached a staring Joe, the levels of smug on her porcelain-perfect features reaching levels heretofore unknown. Upon coming within arm's reach of him where he sat, she promptly reached out, took a hold of the sides of his head, and planted his face right in the danger zone.

Joe gasped, wheezed, and let out a strained, quiet cry from the back of his throat. He was an ass man, yes, but he was still a straight man, and Cinderella was clearly getting intense satisfaction from getting him got, using her front-facing assets rather than hitting him with the easy mode cake factory she could bring to bear against him, no less.

He was, needless to say, defeated, and the woman standing tall (figuratively) in victory preened. Then she pulled him in closer, achieving as much contact as she could while rapidly growing more distinctly affectionate. It took Joe a moment to register why she was suddenly getting more forceful and brazen. The man had been more frustrated than he would like to admit by all the beautiful women giving him so much positive attention since waking in that Ark hospital.

In other words: his hands had decided to act of their own will, and Cinderella took that as encouragement. Understandably so, but still! Danger! Danger! Rapi said she was coming up at some point! She'd walk in to see Joe's face buried in Cinderella's chest, and with two handfuls of her admittedly Heavenly posterior! Had he ever touched her like this before? No, he hadn't! He just gave her the green light when Rapi might be on her way up! Oh fuck, oh shit, oh-

To punish him for his increasing lack of self-control, Joe heard the hallway door slide open. His entirely obfuscated eyes went wide, and his hormones were assaulted all the more by the sharp intake of perfumed air he inhaled as horror hit him like a brick.

"Commander-" A sharp pause. It was worse. It was so much worse. That wasn't Rapi's voice.

"Oh," Cinderella started, still holding Joe's face in her chest. "Foreman Liter, hello-"

"WHAT ARE YOU TWO PERVERTS DOING!?" Liter cried out, audibly stomping towards the desk, to which Joe forcefully drew his face back and out of Cinderella's chest to whip his gaze around to focus on a very visibly displeased tiny and brightly-coloured safety-yellow foreman. "I literally just told you I'd be coming up here to talk about zoning and building stuff since you brought it up! Why the Hell would you start with your nasty whoopie when-!"

She sharply stopped, then presented a withering glare Cinderella's way, upon noticing her underboob sweater.

"YOU," the pint-sized foreman started, pointing an accusatory finger at the twintailed bombshell. "This is you on your weird exhibitionism kink, isn't it!? First, you go around my worksites, wearing that little perverted dress that has your bahangas looking ready to fall out at the slightest jiggle, and your whole butt hanging out of your perverted short skirt with those threadbare panties that hide nothing while you keep going out of your way to climb on top of things where you know everyone can see you! Then you go and time your attempt at hanky-spanky time with your beau to when I was supposed to be coming up to meet him! You wanted to be seen, didn't you!? Why are you like this!?"

She then pointed at Joe dramatically, all but gnashing her teeth in overt anger.

"And why are you leaning into it!? Am I gonna start hearing about you damn pervert kids rutting like dogs in heat getting caught going at it in the hallways, or even on the benches in the street!? Why are you like this!? Why can't you damned kids lock your front door and do it in the bedroom or the washroom or kitchen like normal people!? What, you see a big pair of boobs and you just lose control of yourself!? Why can't kids these days behave themselves, damn it! Back in my day, youngin's at least knew to tape a sock or a scrunchie to the door if they were gonna make whoopie and couldn't lock it!"

Cinderella let Liter go off, and when the deceptively old woman paused to take a breath in the midst of her pissed off granny rant, she interjected. "'Exhibitionist' is such a crude-sounding word. I much prefer to say that I am 'free spirited and generous in sharing the bounty of my beauty with the world-'"

"YOU ADMIT IT!" Liter pointed at her again, now snarling like a very angry Welsh Corgi. "I knew it! You helping around construction sites was just an excuse to let everyone see up your skirt! I'd better not see you wearing anything other than pants on my worksites anymore!"

"How cruel. Why should everyone not get to exalt in my beauty?" Cinderella inquired, giving Liter an unimpressed look as Joe was strikingly reminded that, yes, this woman really was Andersen's daughter given how he'd previously said damn near the exact same thing about walking about the Avenger while basically naked, and that was starting to become Joe's problem specifically. "Everyone should be granted such a wondrous display of-"

"You're just a pervert that wants to swing her bazongers and butt around in public for cheap thrills!" Liter countered as she leaned forward, dramatically jabbing her finger out at Cinderella. "You-!"

Joe wished for an out from his own failing self-control, and boy howdy did the monkey's paw curl to grant him his wish. As Liter continued to scream, and started to shout in Welsh again, already, the Commander could tell that this was going to be a long day.


Andersen forlornly looked upon the many signs he'd had produced for the Outpost, reminded of just how badly Joe had disappointed him with his choice of name by Mustang's message. "'Shangri-La…' Come on, what were you thinking, when the obvious choice was right there? When we were so close to greatness?" He whined, running his fingers along the length of the sign that was supposed to be set up just outside the elevator to the Ark.

"A Big Boss denied his Outer Heaven…" Andersen remarked grimly, covering one of his eyes—the wrong eye that Solidus Snake, not Big Boss had lost, specifically—while grimacing. "Joe… I'll remember this, you bastard." He darkly remarked in the storage unit filled with 'Outer Heaven' branded signage. "I swear, I'll remember this."
 
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this chapter had me laughing, glad to see this updated! And yeah, missed opportunity, hope Anderson tells Joe about what could've been. Thanks for the update! Also, I can almost feel the timer counting down for when Joe loses all self control. He's got a Large group of gorgeous women who want him emotionally and carnally... and he's running out of excuses...
 
BakaSmurf said:
"A Big Boss denied his Outer Heaven…"
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Click to shrink...

OH NO! IT'S HIM!

metal-gear.gif
 
BakaSmurf said:
With that, Pinne stepped off the cliff's edge, and soared back upwards upon the mechanical wings afforded to her by Eden's best. Without missing a beat, she took off back towards mankind's only surface holdout, leaving Dorothy where she knelt.
Click to expand...
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Wait, I forgot something about thus.

Didn't Pinne die sometime before canon Nikke starts and became Dorothy's hallucination? Or am I misremembering things again?
 
Chapter 92 - Without Mercy, Without Cause, Right Under the Bus
===
Chapter 92 - Without Mercy, Without Cause, Right Under the Bus
===

The rest of the day proceeded as well as it could, given that Liter would not relent and continued to harangue Joe and Cinderella over their conduct—which compounded when Rapi showed up, flushed in the face for some reason, and was roundly accused of appearing seeking a 'pervert threesome.'

Rapi did nothing to disabuse Liter of the notion when her response was to turn beet red and refuse to look at either Joe or Cinderella. The tiny little angry Welsh grandma (that was probably actually the youngest person in the room) got all the angrier at that, needless to say.

It took a while for Liter to chill out, and once she did, she absolutely insisted that she talk to Joe about business stuff right then and there. Meaning she was refusing to leave him alone with the two pervert women that were getting increasingly bold as time went by. While normally, Joe would be quick to defend his girls from such slander… Well, considering Cinderella was kind of an increasingly open exhibitionist, and Rapi was—well, Red Hood—it kind of wasn't slander, was it?

At any rate, once it was clear that Liter was pointedly cock blocking and would allow no 'funny business' to happen, Cinderella and Rapi eventually drifted off out of boredom and displeasure from being mean-mugged. After some time of Liter pressing the increasingly beleaguered man to do miserable administrative stuff, the displaced Canuck was left alone, well into the dark.

Surprisingly, nobody came to his room that night, and he'd been allowed to rest without being bothered. As well as he could have slept, given everything that had happened that day, at least.

The following morning, Joe's thoughts drifted to recent events, to Marian, and Dorothy… But, as it was, there wasn't a whole lot for him to do about them for now, was there? Barring- He blinked, realizing that he'd never actually followed up on the Vapaus bullet with Snow White. They really ought to talk about that, considering it would be key to freeing Marian from the Corruption, if at all.

…Just as soon as she was back from the Northern Base, considering he'd received a confirmation text from Snow White that she was boarding a vertical take-off and landing vehicle to head out and perform maintenance on Alice, and hopefully get the poor little pink bunnygirl's faulty Exceed under control. So, for the time being, the Commander would just head downstairs and see what the girls were up to, maybe see if Sunny was still being mobbed by her fellow Tetra Line MPs.

Upon stepping out of the elevator on the ground floor, Joe was met by Anis, seemingly on her way out of the building. "Oh, Commander, hey," she started, doing quite well in the ongoing midst of their discussion wherein she'd revealed her identity as Pretty. They'd interacted since then seeing as how that was several days ago, but it hadn't been anything particularly deep. "Basking in your newfound celebrity status?" She inquired in a teasing tone.

With a roll of his eyes and a light scoff, Joe lightly shook his head. "I'll never get used to having all eyes on me. Kind of miss the times when I could walk around without everyone taking notice."

"Oh," Anis lightly pursed her lips at that. "Well, that sucks, given that even Rupee from Talentium has been talking about you on her streams. You're kind of becoming a big deal in Tetra Line."

"Someone important, I guess?" Joe wondered aloud while scratching the back of his neck. He'd never heard of 'em, at least.

"Famous business magnate and streamer. Super well-known all over the Ark. So, having her attention is kiiiind of a big deal and signal boost," Anis noted with a bit of a strained grimace.

"So gonna get all the more attention on me," Joe sighed heavily, rubbing his neck in defeated resignation. "Well, guess that brief stint of anonymity was nice while it lasted…"

Anis shrugged apologetically, attempting to present the man with an empathetic smile. "Guess that's what you get for being competent, while most other Commanders sort of wallow in obscurity and gambling debt," she adjusted her top, to which Joe was grateful that his gaze was already mostly averted given how distracting it was whenever she did that. "Luckily, you don't exactly make yourself a super public figure, so you'll probably be able to get away without getting recognized and assaulted by fans for a while longer."

The messy-haired blonde reached up and set a finger on her plump bottom lip in consideration before she continued.

"Kinda like me, actually. So welcome to the club, I suppose."

Joe popped an eyebrow, then his lips parted in acknowledgement. "Ah. Right. You actually get recognized, then?" That was somewhat concerning, considering… Well, the events leading up to her Mind Switch.

"Kinda?" Anis replied with a noncommittal shrug. "I don't exactly dress… Act… Walk… Or really even look how I used to. Used to be more… Girly, I suppose."

"...You aren't girly now?" Joe asked dubiously, lightly cocking his head at the former all-star idol.

The blonde responded with her own scoff and a roll of her eyes, her voice taking on a sarcastic tone. "Oh yeah, because you're so used to seeing me sashaying about in a glittering skimpy little dress with my super long, gold-decorated hair done up in big pretty and fancy pigtails all the time, right?"

Joe blinked, his heart skipping a beat as his mind's eye projected the implied style of Pretty onto Anis. Good Lord, danger, danger! Twintails Anis would be-

"A-ha!" Anis suddenly lightly buckled her knees while jamming a finger out to just brush the tip of the Commander's nose. "I knew it! You're one of those pigtails fetishists! No wonder Privaty and Cinderella got you wrapped around their little fingers!"

Joe hurked, recoiling and grabbing the end of his nose as if it had been assaulted. "Y-you-" He almost tried to deny it, but he couldn't deny the truth that rested in his heart. Twintails were love. Twintails were life. Anis had him dead-to-rights, and the smug on her face was ruinous.

"I'm filing that fact away for later," Anis asserted, taking the finger she'd attacked his nose with and setting it to the side of her head with a series of taps.

"Wait, what does that-" Joe almost started to panic, imagining Anis with twintails, but then his brain caught up with the moment, and he recognized that Anis' hair was too short for that. So Joe just lightly scoffed, crossing his arms and sneering. "Here I was concerned for a moment, but you can't do anything with that information," he declared, letting out a single chuckle before he reached out and lightly bobbed the ends of her poofy hair. "You are powerless, girl," he declared smugly.

However, Anis just leaned in, setting her hands on her hips as she presented him with a dangerous grin. "Nikkes can get transplants for all sorts of things, you know. Especially Nikkes with connections at the top."

Joe paused, staring, trying to find the crack in her bluff. However, he realized it at once: Anis had immediate and very deep and close ties to fucking Mustang. If she asked him for something, he'd give it to her without question. Normally, Nikkes would get cosmetic alteration requests de-prioritized to shit. But Anis was none other than Pretty. By all accounts, the jewel of Mustang's eye, which was saying something.

He knew at once that she could see the neurons connecting in his head as he stared at her in mounting horror. Such was impossible to miss, with the intensely smug cat-like grin finding purchase on her features as she remained leaned over for a few moments, which Joe only then realized was quite perilous given the reminder that Anis wore a very low-cut top.

Then, the former super star returned to her full height, standing up straight as she tilted her head back and let out a self-satisfied little 'humph' of victory. "So, as I was saying- Wait, what were we talking about again- Oh, right!" She snapped her fingers before continuing. "Yeah, I sometimes get kind of recognized. Like, rarely, someone will just stare at my face, because like, I do my makeup way differently, but, my face is still the same, right? And like, my hair's bobbed short now, but it's the same colour and everything."

Crossing her arms beneath her chest, Anis lightly tilted her head to the side in consideration.

"Being a bit of a tomboy now-" She pointed a finger at Joe with a terrifying speed that cut through the air loudly—an abrupt reminder the Nikkes were bullshit super soldiers. "Compared to how I used to be, it has its benefits as far as being anonymous goes."

Joe bit his tongue. He didn't think there was anything 'tomboyish' about the dangerously small and tight top, skin-hugging short shorts, and squish-emphasizing thigh highs Anis wore. But, in all fairness, she apparently used to wear the kind of fancy, ostentatious super star dress that Mustang would approve of, so, comparatively, fine, sure. He'd give her that.

Anis pursed her lips, finding a measure of annoyance in how Joe didn't seem willing to entirely agree with her assessment. She did, however, seemingly let it go with a shrug before continuing. "So where were you headed this fine morning?"

Joe's answer came plainly, taking the opportunity to avoid being forced to acknowledge that Anis had him on the ropes. "I was just going to see what everyone was up to, then get breakfast, I suppose. Nothing super pressing to tend to right now."

Anis contemplated the man for a moment, a smile building on her face in the instants before she reached out and took a hold of the Commander's wrist, suddenly tugging him along with a broad grin. "Come with me, then! You told me to drag you around to do stuff with me anyways, right?"

Though he was about to protest in confusion, if nothing else, she had a point. Plus… Yeah, if Anis—or any other Nikke, for that matter—wanted to spend time with him, then why would he not? "Alright, alright, I'm coming, I'm coming," Joe declared with a put-upon sigh. "Where're we going, then?"

"You'll see!" Anis asserted with a wide smile. "You'll see, and you'll be grateful too."

That gave Joe a degree of pause, but he simply allowed Anis to pull him along. Mean as she could be as demonstrated by this morning's ambush, she was still a ladybro that could and should be trusted at the end of the day.

So he'd trust Anis to not go out of her way to throw him under the bus first thing in the morning.


"Seriously?" Joe very dubiously inquired, his brows as flatly lidded as they possibly could be, standing before the location in the Ark proper Anis had dragged him to.

"What?" Anis pursed her lips to the side at the man's response to their destination. "You said that you hadn't eaten yet, so what's the problem?"

"Maid For You?" Joe noted while motioning upwards at the maid café he'd last visited with Privaty—where he'd learned that Anis also moonlighted as a café maid. "Really?"

"What? You don't want to be served breakfast by beautiful women first thing in the morning?" Anis teasingly asked.

Given how early it was in the morning, and that the café had only just opened, the street in front of it was all but entirely vacant and quiet. It actually looked like the two were going to be the first customers of the day.

"There's a one-in-three chance that I'll wind up served a plate of omurice with an entire bottle of ketchup dumped on it by Cocoa," Joe noted flatly.

"Cocoa only works in the afternoon," Anis noted matter-of-factually. "It'll be one of the three beautiful, big ladies that work here serving you today, potentially including the new girl!" she proudly puffed her chest for emphasis out as she did so.

Ah… "Did you drag me here to score points with the boss as you started your shift?" Joe asked, narrowing his eyes as he warily gazed at the blonde.

"I don't work today!" Anis asserted with a light huff. "Not me, the new new girl! I'm here for pleasure!" She declared with an anticipatory glint in her amber eyes.

"Oh. Well, there's another new girl here?" Joe's gaze drifted to the café, popping a curious eyebrow. "Whomst?"

"You'll see, and you'll be grateful," the bodacious blonde remarked, smugly. "Made it kind of obvious how much you like Soda's uniform, y'know."

That- Actually gave Joe some pause as something occurred to him. "Hey, would you mind if I asked about your uniform?"

"Hm? What about it-" Anis blinked, glanced down at her chest, and her lips parted in realization. "Oooh, you're wondering why I wasn't dressed more like Soda?" She asked. "It was my first day. Plus, I was just sort of testing the waters to see if I'd be a good fit for the café. They only had two in storage, and the other one which was probably more to your taste was too tight around the waist for me, so they gave me Ade's old dress for the time being. They're looking into getting me something custom now that I feel comfortable with the idea of working here more consistently," she motioned over her shoulder at the building.

Then, she smiled deviously at the Commander.

"We'll see if you get to see me in something a bit more to your liking later on," the grenadier confidently asserted. Quite the stark contrast to when he'd last seen Anis working as a serving maid.

Joe nervously rubbed the back of his neck. Confident girls were dangerous. "I don't remember you being anywhere near this bold the last time we were here…"

"I didn't know if we were on good terms or not when you showed up here before," the blonde noted matter-of-factually. "You made it pretty clear that we're good since then, so…" She shrugged.

"Ah," that made sense, yeah. Christ, it really was that bad before Cinderella had pulled his head out of his ass, huh? What a world of difference… "Well, I suppose I prefer it when you're so bold and earnest."

At that, Anis hummed, seeming to find a fair degree of satisfaction in Joe's words. With a cheerful nod, she spun on her heel and motioned for him to follow. Well, come on, then, let's get some good food served by beautiful women in our bellies!"

Man, Anis really was a proper ladybro, huh? At any rate, the man followed her in, passing through the main doors easily, finding themselves greeted by-

The 'new' girl. Her back to the pair. She'd been fiddling with something on her front, and jumped at the sound of the front bell ringing as it was struck by the opening door.

Notably, a pair of cat ears resting atop her crown, cat ears that looked very organic and real, twitched at the sound in time with her jump. Just as stark, was the matching tail sticking out of her skirt which momentarily went ramrod straight at the surprise.

She wore an outwardly detached shirt collar over a black garment over her clavicle which seemed to mirror the feline ears resting on her head. On her arms were long opera gloves that terminated halfway up her bicep, decorated with a pair of cute little black ribbons.

The rear of the dress left her back all but entirely exposed, save for the frilly straps of her apron, which terminated at her waist with a huge, cute white ribbon set before a perilously short ruffled two-layered skirt. 'Short' might've been putting it too conservatively, considering Joe could flat-out see her underwear despite her standing up straight, which he'd have the decency to not go into detail on besides it suitably matching the rest of her attire.

So decent and polite was Joe, that he couldn't help but note that holy shit, her butt is huge.

Her otherwise bare thighs were adorned with garterbelts, attached to a pair of white thigh-socks that produced a distracting amount of squish. At the end of her shapely legs were a pair of fine black stilettos, tall, at least three inches so, adorned with equally dark ribbons on her heels.

Yet, what really got Joe was her hair. Those big, easily recognizable aquamarine twintails which terminated in lovely, black ribbon-adorned drills…

Spinning on her heel, expression twisted and eyes clenched shut in embarrassment, Privaty cried out: "H-H-H-Hello, m-m-masters! P-please let us s-serve you t-today! N-nyaaaaAAAHHH-!" The counter-terrorism specialist trailed off from her anime catgirl meow into a horrified scream the moment she creaked her eyes open, only to realize who it was she was addressing. "J-J-JOE!?" She cried out with wide, mortified eyes.

A frilly headband was worn in front of the seemingly real cat ears she suddenly had, with a cute little pawprint hairclip worn to the left of her perfectly-manicured bangs.

From the front, her white dress collar—which seemed to actually be attached to a wide open-front and open-back two-toned black shirt, which amounted to a pair of fabric straps framing her chest—had a brass cat bell that dangled below a black ribbon, sounding out as she'd spun.

The brassiere of the shirt had a white ruffled fringe over the cleavage which travelled down as a white stripe which disappeared behind her apron, which too was adorned with a cute cat-themed nametag announcing who she was to the world. The sides of the brassiere, on the other hand, were black, and lacy.

The dress was, honestly, gorgeous. Privaty absolutely rocked it, would actually floor the man, given how provocative it was compared to her usual type of attire.

But, Joe's attention was captured by something else that-

"Holy shit, where did those come from!?"

Silence. Silence reigned for a few long moments before Joe's mind caught up to his mouth, and he realized that he'd just said that aloud while flagrantly staring at Privaty's way bigger than he remembered it being chest.

Privaty, decked out as a skimpily-dressed catgirl maid, stared up at Joe, mouth agape and eyes wide in disbelieving shock as she stood with her hands shaped into a heart before her chest. The poor girl's face, needless to say, had turned as red as a stove top heating element on full blast.

After a beat, Anis leaned in towards Privaty, and with a devilish, shit-eating ear-to-ear grin, all but chortled in a sing-song tone to the counter-terrorism catgirl-maid, "I told you he'd love the dress, and the fact that you've been wearing one of those crazy Elysion compression bras this whole time!"

Betrayal. Joe's mind cried out at Anis inexplicably and cruelly throwing him under the bus… Only to rear back in terror upon realizing that he was also in terrible danger. An expression equal parts embarrassed, anticipatory, smug, and elated found purchase on Privaty's features as her lips warbled in an open-mouthed silent cheer, eyes locked on Joe's own.

God, so terribly cruelly, continued to send the Legendary Commander his most difficult battles without reprieve.
 
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Fragment of Serenity said:
Anis broke bro code.

Lads, what is the appropriate punishment for such a horrific betrayal?
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BakaSmurf said:
"I told you he'd love the dress, and the fact that you've been wearing one of those crazy Elysion compression bras this whole time!"
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Elysion's Tactical-Brand Compression Bras are fucking insane in how effective they are. And it seems like the majority of the Elysion cast has them. (See: Rapi, Privaty, Delta, D, etc.)
 
Chapter 93 - The Privaty Special
===
Chapter 93 - The Privaty Special
===

While Privaty stared up at Joe like a wolf loomed over a cornered rabbit kit, Anis started off into the café, raising a hand into the air as she called out: "Aaaade, Anis is here! Where's Soda?"

"Oh, hello Anis, isn't today your day off?" Ade could be heard in the back, the room she'd previously disappeared into the first time Joe had patronized the business with Privaty. "Soda's getting dressed for her shift."

Anis boldly swung open the door to the employee's-only area—presumably the changing room—declaring: "Soooda! I'm here to help you get dressed!"

"Ah-" Soda started, calling back cheerfully. "Anis! Hello! I'd give you a hug, but I'm having some trouble getting into my top-" The two's voices (and Anis' lurid, purile giggles) were muffled by the door automatically swinging shut behind the blonde, leaving Joe and Privaty standing alone in the main room-

"I knew it…" Privaty started quietly, giving Joe a tiny little shark-like grin. "You are a big boobie enjoyer! You were imagining me dressed up like this the whole time!" She asserted, propping up her chest with her forearm. "I knew you were thinking about my big honkers like that all the while!"

Oh God, Privaty and her endless cavalcade of synonyms for 'breasts' again… "Oh yeah, I was thinking about a beautiful woman the whole time I was with her, imagine that," Joe declared past lidded eyes,

Privaty, in response, recoiled, eyes going wide and mouth gaping. "W-w-what the- I-I'm not- Who are you calling- What do you mean 'with!?'" She demanded as her cheeks burned red.

Cocking his head, noting how Privaty, despite how boldly she was dressed, seemed to be as defenceless as ever, and so instincts took over despite himself. "'Who am I calling' what? Who am I calling 'beautiful?' You, ya boob," the Commander asserted with a minute smirk.

The beautiful bluenette's shock only redoubled at that. In fact, she took several steps backwards, as if retreating from a vicious onslaught, lips opening and closing like a fish out of water. "Y-y-y-you-" she stammered out, as though out of breath from running a marathon. "Y-you… You're still talking about my badonka-donks!" The little tsundere catgirl counter-terrorism specialist maid asserted, dramatically pointing at the man's face. "You're a… A… A big boobie lover!" She deeply lamely tried to parry and riposte Joe's attack.

The man, however, just smirked all the more at the futile attempt. Instead, he turned to the side with a heavy sigh, crossing his arms in faux disappointment. "And you're such an unkind maid…"

"Eh-" Privaty blinked before rebounding, leaning over on the tips of her toes as her button features twisted up in apparent anger. "What is that supposed to mean!? Are you casting aspersions on my performance as an employee of Maid for You!?" She demanded, arms held ramrod straight behind her as her nostrils flared.

"Here I am starving to death, and you just cruelly force me to stand here, accusing me of perversions as I suffer such terrible hunger pangs…" Settling his hands on his stomach, putting on a pitiful expression of distress. Fate, for once, decided to align with Joe, and did so in service to defeating Privaty—actually producing a weak growl from his gut with literal exact perfect timing.

He could not have hoped for better. Doubly so considering how Privaty's tsun-tsun anger instantly made way for seemingly genuine concern and guilt. "Ah-oh, ah, they aren't feeding you in the Outpost!?" She cried out with a grimace, turning aside to consider something for a few moments. "T-then… S-shall I show you to your seat, M-Master?"

Being entirely honest, Joe wasn't about being referred to with any sort of deferential title, but that sort of just seemed to be how Maid for You worked, so he opted to not make a big deal of it. Being called 'Master,' specifically. He was gonna be a melodramatic bitch about how he hadn't eaten yet. Punctuated by leaning over slightly while clutching at his stomach, letting out a low, exaggerated whine.

Joe was not the type to typically whine about much at all, but it put Privaty on the back foot and defeated her, despite how she tried to present herself as a tough girl… The way she popped up on her toes, hands balling up before her mouth, and her brow fell in naked, girly concern spoke volumes to what sort of woman she really was.

Doubly so when she just reached over, grabbed him by the wrist and-

Holy shit! The man cried out in his mind at how easily Privaty was able to start pulling him along towards a table. She was teeny-tiny, Joe literally had an entire foot on her! There was a whole-ass head's difference between them in height. And she was slim—or, rather, she wasn't slim, she was very curvy and visibly soft. Rather, she wasn't muscular. If she dieted a certain way, she could absolutely keep a lovely layer of squish over an otherwise athletic frame, but holy mackerel, Batman! She just tugged and he moved.

He wasn't given too much time to dwell on Privaty's hidden gorilla strength, before he found himself practically forced into one of the cute chairs set before a little round couple's table—those so small as to encourage a pair to lean in towards each other all romantic-like as they ate.

"H-here!" Privaty declared, picking up a menu and shoving into the man's chest, eyes practically glimmering with worry and concern. "Pick something!" She pressed him, remaining leaned over with a particular intensity, cat ears lightly twitching atop her head-

He'd forgotten about the realistic cat ears. Somehow, despite his eyes needing to drift over them to look at literally any other part of her. Was it the dress? It was probably the dress. Holy shit did she look good in that dress.

But, anyway… Actually feeling a little guilty about how genuinely guilty he was making her feel, rather than be a shitter, Joe actually looked at the menu, which was about as he'd remembered it being-

Save for the 'Privaty Special' advertised at the bottom of the menu, which was to say that it was literally taped onto it. It was adorned with a cute little anime chibi-styled rendition of Privaty herself, the sight of which produced a smile on the Commander's face. He could tease her over it, but the guilt was real, so he instead focused on the tacked-on addition to the menu.

A burger, huh? The café didn't have anything like that previously. Humming, it was designated as 'build your own,' listing all the toppings offered. Eyes quickly scanning their surroundings, upon confirming that they were the only ones present—at least in the front. Man, it must have been a battle to get Soda into that top—actually, yeah, he'd seen what she looked like in that thing and how it looked to be dying trying to contain her assets. They were probably engaging in the dressing equivalent of the Death Star Trench run just to get Soda in uniform back there.

At any rate, "Hey, what do you like on a burger?" He inquired, presenting a sly little smirk Privaty's way.

"Eh?" She blinked, looking more than a little surprised. "Ah- You're- Oh, y-you want the… 'P-Privaty Special,' then?" She asked, her cheeks taking on a rosy hue at mentioning the name. "W-well… I'd recommend toasted buns, an extra-thick beef patty with lettuce, a lightly salted tomato slice, special sauce, and a slice of American cheese along with fries and gravy."

Fries and gravy, not ketchup? Hell yeah, his kinda girl.

"Well then…" Joe started, setting down the menu. "I'd like the buns toasted with garlic butter, an extra thick-patty, lettuce, sweet pickles, and honey mustard along with fries and gravy."

There was a beat before Privaty's sudden cat tail and ears spiked out straight, the little lady leaning over in openly irate annoyance. "Why'd you even ask for my opinion if you're not gonna-!?"

"Plus," he declared, finger lashing out and stopping just short of poking her on the nose. "One burger as per your personal recommendation."

She blinked, pausing before lowly growling. "-You… What, are you trying to impress me by ordering too much food or something?" She demanded to know before shooting up to her diminutive height with a sharp 'hmph!' "Well fine then! You'll get your two whole burgers, and I'll laugh when you get a stomach ache because you tried to act like some kinda big tough guy!" Spinning on her heel, she raised a hand to the kitchen area…

And froze. It was empty.

"...W-wait…" Her gaze snapped to the changing room door, then back to the empty kitchen. "Wait! I'm the only one on the floor- D-does that mean I have to-" A jolt seemed to shoot up her spine, tail going rigid and sticking up, which Joe tried valiantly to not take advantage of with his protesting eyes, before she let out a little warbling whine.

Spinning around again, she pointed dramatically at Joe.

"D-Don't misunderstand, you hear?" She demanded of him, attempting to hide a goofy smile behind her free hand. "I-I'm only going to cook for you because I have to! Don't read anything into this, it's not like I want to cook for you or anything, you hear me!?" With that declaration, she spun around towards the kitchen again, her tail damn near whipping him in the face as she started off quickly.

Joe couldn't help but stare, given how the way Privaty dressed called all sorts of attention to her midsection when she was standing still, to say nothing of when she walked with that heavy sashay that accompanied her tall heels. Good Lord, what a beautiful woman… That aside, he couldn't help but smirk heavily. Hook, line, and sinker…

It took a bit considering all of the food in the establishment was prepared fresh, but Privaty was clearly quite proficient at preparing burgers. Everything was done with efficient precision, and quickly enough, the Heavenly scent of cooking meat (or nutrium, he supposed) wafted through the café. Quickly enough, she returned with a pair of plates bearing his orders, setting the plates down in front of him, she gave him a bit of a sneering, unimpressed look. "Go on then, eat too much and complain about how-"

Joe pushed the order made to her recommendation across the surface, then stood up, cutting her off. With a confused 'eh?' Privaty watched as Joe stepped around the table, took a hold of the chair sitting opposite of him, pulled it out, and instructed the maid: "Go on, have a seat."

Staring at the man in no small amount of confusion, Privaty looked between him, the chair, the extra order, and after perhaps a bit longer than it should have taken her, she jumped. "W-wait! You- You didn't-!" She then caught the smug look on his face. "You… Yoooou…" She tried to look mad, attempting to present a wide smile as a teeth-clenched grimace. "I-I'm on the job, you dummy!"

"You aren't allowed to take a break?" Joe asked, motioning over the empty establishment. "Even when you just got finished serving the only customer in the building?"

Recoiling as if struck, she brought both hands up to cover her mouth. Unfortunately, Privaty didn't seem to realize that she smiled with her cheeks and eyes as well. "You must think you're so clever…"

Smirking harder, Joe returned to his seat, setting his elbows on the table and resting his chin atop his interlinked fingers. There, he waited.

"I-" Privaty paused, eyes going wide as horror overtook her features. "I-I need too…" She trailed off, defeat overtaking her features.

Ah, victory, to know that he'd won, and Privaty had to sit down and share a delicious meal with-

"Become tastier!" Privaty cut his thoughts off as she made a heart with her hands, her voice pitching up several octaves while popping up on a single leg, motioning as if to 'push' the heart onto the burgers. "Coochie-woochie boing!"

Then, a holographic heart shot out of her hands in a spray of stars and sparkles, fading into the dishes.

Joe stared up at Privaty. Privaty stared down at Joe.

Cyberpunk technology. Turned to level up maid cafés in the most sickeningly cutesy manner possible.

Her palpable embarrassment was the stuff of legends. Joe opted to make it worse. "How is it that you manage to constantly be the cutest little thing ever no matter what?"

Privaty's silent scream from behind her hands alone made this one of the better mornings he'd experienced in the Ark so far.


Gazing at Privaty from beyond his cleaned plate, Joe smiled idly as she finished polishing off the last of her fries, eliciting a small 'eep' and demand of "What're you looking at me for!?" once she'd noticed.

To which, Joe smiled a little bit wider before declaring: "Thank you for the meal, Privaty. It was delicious."

At that, she started stuttering and quivering, trying to hide her reddening face and goofy smile.

Sometimes, it was great to bully the tsundere with affection too.

Ade, Soda, and Anis all finally emerged from the back room after Joe and Privaty finished their impromptu meal together—Anis wearing the mother of all shit-eating grins as she did so, to say nothing of how giggly Soda was as Ade let out a satisfied sigh at the sight of the two finishing up their burgers.

Meaning that everyone took so long because Anis was probably deliberately holding them back. Because—Wait, why did Anis do that? In fact, it seemed as though she'd set this whole thing up. What-

Then, it hit him like a sack of bricks once he recognized the grin and thumbs-up Anis shot him. She was wingmanning. She was wingmanning, and Joe just improvised a date with Privaty oh no wait shit why had he done that shit was already complicated enough with Rapi and Cinderella as it was oh fuck-

"-I-I wasn't slacking off-!" Privaty declared as she shot to her feet, looking more than a little mortified.

"Break's over, Privaty," Ade declared gently, cutting the bluenette off. "Time to get back to work before the morning rush starts up," she lightly clapped her hands together like a proper lady. "Get the dishes, chop chop!"

With a spattering of tsundere-coded muttering and whining, Privaty did as instructed, gathered up the dishes they'd used, and scrambled off into the kitchen area.

Joe, left where he'd been seated, let out a nervous laugh, gradually rising to his feet. "So, uh, should pay and head out, I suppose."

"As you say, Master," Ade declared with a bright, soothing smile that felt intensely natural for her.

With that done, Joe was left ready to go, and just as well, people started filing in to be greeted by Ade. Anis assured him that she was going to stick around to get her own food and hang out with Soda, and to not wait up for her.

The smug grin she gave him when he leaned over and muttered "Yoooou…" to her, given how she'd set him up, was intensely aggravating.

Doubly so when, continuing to smile without shame, she just declared: "See you later, Commander!" with a cutesy little wave before about-facing and moving right for Soda, who was preparing something in the kitchen alongside Privaty.

Catching her eye, Privaty jumped once he'd noticed that she was watching him. Appearing to almost seek an out, she halted when he waved at her with a wide smile. That seemed to get her, and she couldn't help but downright shyly wave back from across the building. With that, payment made and everything, Joe left to return to Shangri-La.

Ambling down the street that looked so much like a shot directly out of the 'nicer' parts of Night City complete with the holographic signage and such—strange lack of vehicles aside—Joe paid little mind to the average Ark dwellers, who paid little mind to him in turn. It was a simulated bright, cloudless day; though the complete lack of the sun's characteristic warm kiss upon the skin, and the fact that one could stare upwards directly at it with impunity betrayed the falsity of the great star gazing down upon the last of two cities on Earth.

A disturbing notion, if one stopped to think about it. How many people born in the Ark just didn't know that you were supposed to be able to feel the sun? Joe had also learned that rain was rarely simulated in the Ark, and such moments were actual calendar events that were planned out ahead of time. Yet still, that just felt wrong. It highlighted how fake the simulated 'outdoor' nature of the Ark was. How even rain was something most had just never naturally experienced. To say nothing of the fact that 'wind' was only ever experienced via fans.

Musings on the disturbing nature of the Ark aside, given that Joe didn't want to dwell too much on things he could do nothing about…

That interaction with Privaty was nice. Just nice. They didn't talk about much, anything deep or what have you. It was just… Nice. Consistently, it was lovely how he could just have a good time with Privaty. Though by the same token, Good Lord, what the fuck, Anis? Privaty was wonderful, but Cinderella and Rapi. Why was Anis complicating an already complicated situation further?

Hell, why did he?

…Well, he knew why. Because he immediately clicked with Privaty, and loved interacting with her. She just brought that aspect out of him in a way few women did. She was just wonderful. Rapi and Cinderella were as well, but he didn't really get the chance to-

Blinking, realization hit him again. Joe hadn't gone out to do anything with Rapi. And he couldn't do anything with Cinderella, because she couldn't risk setting foot in the Ark. Man, Rapi and Cinderella deserved outings too, right? The Commander decided right then and there to push to get some sit-down eateries and at least a theatre built in the Outpost soon. Rapi, he could just bring to the Ark. Cinderella? Couldn't take her anywhere, and that wasn't fair.

Yeah, that was decided then. Get them girls out and about to have nice outings too. That was the least they deserved.

It'd doubtlessly help with morale for the rest of the Nikkes too. Granted, all but Pioneer could just go to the Ark, but it was a long elevator ride down. Just make things a little more convenient for everyone living in Shagri-La.

But, still… Cinderella, Rapi, and Privaty-

And Marian.

Shit. If they managed to save her, cure her of the Corruption… She had declared her love for him, at the end there. She was waiting for his answer to her declaring that she'd wanted to be in a proper relationship with him on that mission to the surface.

He didn't want to purge her of the Corruption, only to have the first thing she'd learn being that he'd moved on so quickly. That kind of heartbreak, after going through Corruption and being turned into a Heretic?

Joe had feelings for Rapi and Cinderella. He could also just tell that holy shit did he click with Privaty. But, he couldn't be committing to anyone just yet. At least, until after he'd had the chance to talk to Marian. If he got the chance to talk to Marian. Things had to be settled with her, before anything could happen with anyone else.

He… Wasn't even sure that he wanted to be with Marian over the others. He'd had a lovely half-month with her, and Hell, he'd have probably agreed to at least try at a relationship had she not been Corrupted, but things were different from how Joe thought they'd been when he'd initially woken in the Ark, with none of his memories intact.

He simply didn't want to cause Marian yet more pain before talking to her. She had suffered enough.

Grimacing, it was all the man could do to wish that his potential love life wasn't so damned complicated.
 
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Forgetting about logistics of human male and anime tier athletics (especially without regeneration of the Cummander) of Nikkies there is not a lot ways to resolve this conundrum without making someone crash the fuck out.

Hm, well frankly speaking: Rapi is the easiest one to convince to share both because she is the Red hood and the immense guilt and vow she took to make joe happy with whatever means neccecary.

Can it be a happy arrangement? Probably... yes, but then the harem must belong to both Joe and Rapi at the same time. Otherwise it doubt that Joe will acept such an arrangement in the first place because he kinda loves them too much for that.

Alternativly it can be just a regular threesomes with other Nikkies.

Thinking about that, we might be missing something crucial: Anis acting like a wingman for Joe with Privaty might be a hint that there is something more than Joe sees for now and the exclusivity might be a far lesser issue than Joe thinks.
Becasue lets be honest zero Nikkies have a love life to formulate a culture. And they are hostile to CG enough to defy any propaganda about that for them.
But to confirm that i kinda need to reread the whole thing to check avareness of Anis about Rapi and Cinderella love for Joe.

Also Rapi (well, red hood mostly) need to accept responsibility for Rapunzel.


Edited. Also the thought about existence of maid cafes while ark population has zero sex attraction for Nikkies kinda concerns me.
 
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Chapter 94 - No Rest for the Wicked
===
Chapter 94 - No Rest for the Wicked
===

On his way back to the Outpost elevator, Joe remembered something very particular, and diverted to the Central Government Headquarters. Quickly finding his way up to a familiar floor he'd not visited in a while, it didn't take long for him to emerge into Andersen's office. His old friend was in the middle of hammering away at his computer, and seemed rather surprised to see the junior Commander appear.

"Commander Pholus, I wasn't expecting you," he remarked as he mucked around on his computer a bit more—double-checking the office's anti-surveillance systems no doubt.

After allowing a moment for Andersen to relax, thus indicating that they were doubtlessly safe to speak freely, Joe moved to take one of the seats across from the man's desk, settling down with a light hum. "You're rather late for that meeting in Shangri-La's Command Centre, you know," the junior Commander noted somewhat blithely. Best to exercise a degree of caution regardless of the fact that Enikk was likely actively monitoring them and redoubling their security.

The elder man clearly understood the point being made, however, and so he lightly grimaced at the statement. "...Yes, I am. I have, however, been needing to work myself like a dog to account for your meteoric rise to fame, in my defence," he said, presenting an expression equal parts bemused and annoyed Joe's way as he interlinked his fingers atop his desk. "Considering even the likes of Talentium are talking about you now, it's making my job increasingly difficult."

Joe blinked, and somewhat sheepishly reached up to rub the back of his neck. "Uh, well… That hasn't exactly been intentional on my part."

"Which makes it all the more annoying, having to watch Mr. Big over here casually knock everything around him over because he isn't paying attention to where his Johnson is going as he whips around like a lunatic," Andersen very dryly noted, presenting his younger fellow a flat look.

"I'm suddenly getting flashbacks to Red Hood with having my junk be so casually brought up in conversation like this…" Joe remarked with an embarrassed groan, bringing a hand to his face as he grimaced in a measure of distaste. "I've just been dealing with shit as it comes up. It's not like I've been deliberately causing a stir!"

"You didn't 'deliberately' seduce Red Hood and Ellie either," Andersen noted with all the moisture contained within the Sahara. "To say nothing of that one time with Rapunzel."

"I-" Joe started, his heart threatening to leap from his throat upon Andersen mentioning Cinderella, which caused the knife to flash in his mind's eye again, only to immediately crash and stop. "-That what with Rapunzel?" He asked, brow furrowing in genuine confusion.

There was a pause. A very pregnant pause as Andersen gave Joe a long, expressionless stare. When Joe brought his hands up in confusion, as if to compel the elder man to speak, Andersen sharply replied with: "Nothing, don't worry about it."

"-Huh?" Joe cried, blinking in abject confusion.

"It's nothing, I was just fucking with you, don't worry about it," Andersen asserted very forcefully before aggressively moving on. "You're remarkably skilled at making waves, regardless. It's almost as though there's a reason you've found yourself in the position you have."

Though the younger man was confused by that, it was all Joe could do to just shrug and move on, given that Andersen would just make stuff up all the time back in the day, after all. "Look, shit keeps happening around me, and everyone keeps making a huge deal of it. It's always been that way, and it seems like it always will."

"Yeah, that is how it kept working out with us," Andersen noted with a sigh. "The fact that you were just supposed to be the squad's figurehead to keep the brass off of our necks lives rent free in my head, considering the insanity that keeps cropping up around you, and how you seem predestined to be wed to fame, at any and all costs."

Joe leaned back in his seat, going limp as he allowed that fact to wash over him. Yeah. It never seemed to end. Talk about some bullshit. But, that aside… "So, that being said: when do you think you'll be able to come visit?"

Andersen looked at his computer, considered it for a few moments after clicking on a few things, and replied: "Everyone's just milling around the Outpost?"

Joe started to reply, only to halt as he remembered an important detail. "Snow just left for the Northern Base before I came down to the Ark, actually."

"Ah. Well then," Andersen adjusted his cuffs contemplatively. "I think it would be best if we waited until she returns. Best if everyone's back together for… That meeting."

Nodding shallowly, Joe had to agree. "Yeah, actually. I'll send you a message once everyone's ready for that."

"Sounds like a plan," Andersen said, letting out a small sigh before he contemplated the aether for a time. "That being said… 'Shangri-La?' Seriously? That's what you went with?"

Brow furrowing, Joe took some small measure of offence as he replied: "The fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"'Outer Heaven' was right there!" Andersen asserted, leaning forward in his seat, genuine dismay painted across his features. "What were you thinking, just throwing away the perfect name, wasting a perfect opportunity like that? When we were this close to greatness!?"

Joe stared at Andersen blankly for several long moments, his brow knitting as he processed that accusatory inquiry. "...Are you out of your fucking mind?" Was Joe's legitimately quietly angry reply.

Andersen was visibly taken aback by the audible heat in the junior Commander's voice, and wasn't given the chance to immediately speak back.

"Outer Heaven was a glorified terror state run by a bloodthirsty madman that went out of his way to tell Snake that killing people felt better than sex to him, that a life without war was a life not worth living, and that Snake, being a 'warrior,' was just the same as him," Joe continued actually glowering at Andersen outright. "The entire point of Outer Heaven as an idea was to give Big Boss the means to keep killing, slaughtering men en masse, causing war, explicitly and by his own admission deliberately creating child soldiers so there would always be a war to fight, men to kill. A world where peace would never exist, could never exist."

"Outer Heaven's name is ironic and blunt: it's a place outside of Heaven—literally Hell. A Hell where soldiers would never even receive the opportunity to be anything but a soldier, because there can be no place in Heaven for killers. A Hell where soldiers are born, live, and die on a pointless, purposeless battlefield, creating the next generation of soldiers who too, will never know the peace of Heaven by design."

"A place where the lives of soldiers are entirely without worth. Where they exist for the express purpose of being thrown into a pointless meat grinder from which no worth can be extracted, at the behest of officers that think of them as nothing more than tools to perpetuate their pointless forever war that exists for its own sake, of which there can be no winners or losers. And you expected me to name the Outpost after that nightmare? To inflict that fel augur on a place meant to be a refuge for Nikkes in a world that already is exactly what Outer Heaven was meant to be?"

Leaning forward in his seat, Joe all but snarled the end of his rant at Andersen outright. "'Outer Heaven' already exists here: a place where Nikkes exist for no other reason than to fight and die pointlessly for the pleasure of the mad men that've taken control of society and made themselves enemies of humanity in doing so. It's called 'the Ark,' you fucking donkey!"

Andersen was taken aback, needless to say. Staring wide-eyed, recoiling in his seat. He didn't know how to respond, pupils momentarily darting about, visibly overwhelmed.

Joe's eyes narrowed significantly, and he asked rhetorically: "You've never actually played the MSX Metal Gear games, or critically examined Big Boss in Peace Walker or The Phantom Pain, have you?"

"A-anyways…" Andersen inelegantly attempted to shift the topic, caught off-guard by how harshly he'd been rebuked, and just how betrayed he retroactively felt by Genius Kojumbo for portraying Big Boss as such an unequivocally cool and good guy without flaws in later games, if he was actually so bad at first. "I've still got some work to do here, so, you should head out and let me know as soon as we're good for that meeting-" Pausing, his eyes widened as something came to mind. "-Ah right, expect a call from Ingrid. She's going to be needing Counters for another mission soon."

Rolling his eyes at Andersen's once more revealing how shallow and uncritical his consumption of media was, Joe instead let out a long sigh. "No rest for the wicked, huh? Will there actually be time for that meeting, at this rate?" The older man was a dumb ass, and Joe had been legitimately pissed off at the 'Outer Heaven' suggestion, but Andersen clearly hadn't actually known better, so the younger man would let it go unless the Deputy Chief Commander tried to push it again later.

"It depends on how long Snow White is occupied," Andersen said with a shrug. "I suppose we'll see."

"I suppose we will," Joe rose to his feet, already tired by the knowledge that another mission was fast approaching. "Anything else before I go?"

"No, just," Andersen halted, contemplating the cuffs of his jacket. "Be prepared. This may wind up being a deeply demanding mission."

"Like every other one I've been on since I woke up in that fucking hospital bed," Joe sighed in bone-deep defeat. "Same shit, different day. Let's hope that meeting happens sooner rather than later." He shot the Deputy Chief Commander a half-assed salute as he started to move for the exit. "Smell you later, loser."

"Goodbye forever, see you never," Andersen shot back even as he proceeded to refocus on his computer, already tapping away at it on rapid-fire.

Such was their lot as military officers.


"'Heretic fragments?'" Joe repeated the term as he gazed out the window overlooking Shangri-La.

"Yes," Ingrid affirmed the question as she elucidated over the phone. "The remnants of the Heretic that was defeated by Absolute and Matis a few months ago. We haven't been able to retrieve them up to now on account of the dangerously powerful flames left in the wake of the Heretic's destruction."

"Too dangerous for even Nikkes to approach?" Joe asked.

"Vesti had to have her hand replaced because she got too close to the flames, and her fingers started to melt and fuse together from the radiant heat alone," Ingrid replied matter-of-factually. "Simply put: yes."

"Holy shit," Joe rubbed at his brow, shocked by the implications of just how intensely hot those flames must have been burning to be able to melt Goddessium at all, let alone so quickly.

"Indeed," was Ingrid's dry reply.

"How did killing the Heretic even produce fire anyway? They're Corrupted Nikkes, and Nikkes don't tend to explode when they die in my experience."

"Indivilia's exposed core was struck by lightning at the end of the fight," Ingrid elaborated. "The current theory is that the energy transfer from that interaction explosively overloaded her core. Hence the explosion."

"...So a powerful electrical strike can kill a Heretic if it hits their core directly," Joe mused, filing that point away for later reference. "Duly noted. I suppose these 'Heretic Fragments' have an entirely self-descriptive name, and we're literally being sent to collect the leftover fragments of this 'Indivilia?'"

"That's right," Ingrid declared simply. "The Central Government has been riding our asses about retrieving them ever since. Understandably, all things considered. We don't get very many opportunities to capture Heretic materials for study, as you might imagine. Area H has been off-limits since then."

"Area H?" Joe inquired.

"The crater left in the wake of the explosion," Ingrid noted matter-of-factually. "No Nikke squads have been permitted to so much as attempt approaching it since. Luckily, Andersen is high enough up on the ladder that he was able to get us special permission to do so. Doubly so considering the flames have died down."

Joe hummed in contemplation as he observed Cinderella—wearing that perilously short sundress of hers—attempt to climb a scaffolding with an I-beam loaded on her shoulder at a construction site. 'Attempt' being the keyword, as Liter had latched onto her leg and was making a very valiant attempt to wrestle the white-haired beauty to the ground to stop her exhibitionism. An attempt which was very much going in Liter's favour, to note, given that Liter had Nikke strength, while Cinderella's featherweight frame meant that she was only somewhat heavier than an unaugmented human woman of her size ought to have been.

The sight was actually pretty funny, considering the size difference between them and how Cinderella couldn't really leverage her flight abilities to win the tug-of-war with the pint-sized foreman, given that Ark Nikkes weren't supposed to be capable of flight.

That aside… "So this is an officially sanctioned operation, then?" Joe inquired as he idly rubbed at his bearded chin.

"With a dedicated operator and everything," Ingrid answered easily. "You've worked with Shifty before according to the records I checked. She's reliable and professional. She also tends to exercise discretion when it comes to bearing witness to things the Central Government would generally expect to be reported to them. We can consider her trustworthy unless you do something exceptionally untoward or illegal on the surface."

"That's good to know," Joe replied as he leaned on the wall framing the window, continuing to observe Liter's dogged attempts to prevent Cinderella from flaunting her admittedly perfect cheeks to anyone she could, causing Joe to idly ponder the fact that every woman that seemed interested in him on this branch of creation turned out to be a pervert to some degree. "So, it'll just be myself and Counters going in for this?"

"Absolute will also be accompanying you," Ingrid noted pointedly. "Indivilia is, by all reports, very dead, but we aren't taking chances with this. If she somehow stitches herself back together the moment she senses Nikkes nearby or something like that, we want those that have already demonstrated a capacity to fight her effectively on hand to maximize your chances of survival. Hence the reason I'm also cashing in that favour to have Matis be put under your Command for the operation as well."

"Matis… Missilis' big name squad, yeah?" Joe remarked with a hum. "If you're so quick to vouch for them, then I'm not going to complain about the extra firepower."

"While they may be…" Ingrid started, trailing off as she seemed to consider her next words carefully. "Most comparable to a gaggle of uncorralled headless chickens," holy shit did that comparison cause a pit to form in Joe's stomach real quick, considering that was apparently Ingrid putting it diplomatically. "They are also second only to Absolute. They're among the most powerful Nikkes to have ever been produced by the Ark. Teamed up with Absolute and Counters? I'd be surprised if you three wouldn't make short work of Indivilia if she did wind up reasserting herself out there."

"That's good to know," Joe nodded as though Ingrid could see him doing so over the phone. He didn't like the notion of encountering another Heretic after having been slam-jammed by Mordernia- Marian, so easily even with Snow White and Scarlet on their side, but if this 'Indivilia' had been 'dead' for months now, she was actually probably just dead. "But, speaking of firepower… Neon? Will she be fit to join us?"

"Right, Neon." Ingrid started, sounding intensely fatigued by needing to address her in the first place. "Long story short? Raptilion is a known quantity in the Ark, Commander. Neon hasn't undergone a Mind Switch, and everything she reported to you was the plain truth."

Joe blinked, stared blankly out the window, and eventually replied, "Huh?"

"Yeah," Ingrid sighed before she continued. "I checked her Audio/Visual recordings myself. She sought out and engaged with Raptilion for an extended period of time. Raptilion, as noted, is a known quantity. He's actually rather infamous, in fact. To the point of being on the Central Government's watch list, given his… Unorthodox opinions and research on Raptures."

Joe was about to ask, but then he recalled Neon's ramblings about Raptures being 'friends.'

At once, he recalled the campaign of extinction that had been waged against humanity. The millions killed. The uncountable deaths, the knowledge that so many had to be abandoned on the surface and left to the 'mercy' of the Raptures when the Ark was sealed.

All the lost knowledge, the destroyed cultures, and functionally extinct ethnicities as genocide had been blindly, but no less successfully performed on so many distinct peoples, leaving so precious few to descend into the Ark. Had the Ark not been built so near the Canadian-American border, not been able to pull on the melting pot nature of both North American populations alongside those who had escaped in such small numbers from the rest of the world as it had fallen… The Ark would have turned out even more starkly homogeneous than it already was.

And this 'Raptilion' wanted mankind to make nice with those same Raptures, to become friends with humanity's enemy?

The very notion, now that he knew it wasn't just the deranged rantings of a Mind Switched Nikke, actively infuriated him. With nostrils flaring, he shook his head, making an active effort to calm himself down. This 'Raptilion' was clearly a God damned fool, not someone worth wasting thoughts on. So Joe wouldn't, and would instead just focus on his duty: reclaiming the surface and utterly destroying the Raptures to make Earth mankind's again.

"Neon's tougher than she seems, huh?" The Commander changed the subject away from this Rapture apologist with no small amount of audible heat to his voice, for the sake of his own blood pressure, if nothing else. "I was certain that something in her must have snapped, but she really came out of that whole misadventure no worse for the wear?"

"The only thing she really needed was a shower and a change of clothes," Ingrid replied, allowing the topic to shift with no resistance. "We did do a proper maintenance cycle on her regardless, since we already had her here at Elysion HQ, but yes, there's a reason I assigned her to you. She's basically a solid rock wall as far as stability goes on top of being genuinely competent. Eccentricities aside."

"I'll be sure to rely on her more going forward, then," Joe said as he pushed off the wall next to the window and started to move to sit at his desk. "Estimated time on when we should expect to be deployed?"

"Within the next few days. Make sure your squad is prepared. Even if you're unlikely to encounter a living Heretic out there, the surface is always dangerous. Though if anyone would be aware of that, it would be you."

Powering on his computer with his free hand, Joe started going through the process of sorting out documentation and logistics ahead of time. Though… "Can't risk bringing Pioneer along on account of it being an official operation, yeah?"

"The less attention we bring to them in an official capacity, the better," Ingrid replied dutifully. "There's a reason I'm cashing in on that favour with Syuen to have Matis shore up your projected combat effectiveness in their absence, just in case."

"Fair enough," Joe said as he opened the planning programs Commanders were expected to use (but likely very rarely ever actually did use) to prepare for deployments. "Anything else before I focus on preparations?"

"No," Ingrid stated simply enough. "I'll let you know if anything important comes up, but this should be a fairly straightforward operation, all things considered."

"Understood. I'll get to it, then," the Commander acknowledged her assertion.

"As you were, Commander," Ingrid declared in her typical authoritative way before she cut the call.

Pausing, Joe mused on the 'straightforward operation' bit.

Meaning it was 50/50 odds of being jumped by Chatterbox again.

Joe really hoped they wouldn't wind up getting jumped by Chatterbox again.

They were totally gonna be jumped by Chatterbox again.

Shit.
 
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