Ripples in the Ocean (One Piece SI)

[TheRealEvanSG]

Summary: The clear blue skies, the briny sea, the free life of a pirate... What isn't there to love about One Piece? Okay, sure, there's a genocidal and super restrictive World Government. And sure, there's all kinds of dangerous Devil Fruit users crawling around the globe, and the baseline durability of the worlds' citizenry is way more than a normal human's. All I know is that I'm stoked as hell to be here! Even if I have to deal with BROB. [A complete remake of an old fic of mine, with rewritten and changed plot threads, better writing and grammar, more comedy, and more fluffy catgirls.]​

Ripples in the Ocean
Chapter 1
ROB's Really Get on My Nerves​

-Xomniac- Hey, man, looks like you're back in action.

-EvanAlmighty- Yeah, well, for the time being at least

-EvanAlmighty- I'm stunned I've been able to write this many chapters for my new Naruto SI

-Xomniac- Well, maybe, but anything is better than months of nothing, right? At least you've been able to write a few chapters.

-EvanAlmighty- Yeah, true. You know, I've actually been thinking about Ripples. My old One Piece Self-Insert? The… actually not embarrassing one.

-Xomniac- Oh, yeah.

-Xomniac- Man, it's been a while since you did anything with that.

-EvanAlmighty- I know, right?

-EvanAlmighty- Well, anyway, it's kind of been on my mind recently. I have some plans with Law and stuff, but I don't really know how to implement them. Maybe have them save Evan's eyes. I dunno, I remember talking with Patient about this, but I wanted to run it by you, too.

-Xomniac- Well, I'm always down to toss ideas around!

-EvanAlmighty- Thanks, man. I just… You know, one of the reasons it's been on my mind is… man, it'd be really cool to actually be in our self-inserts' shoes, right? Well. Maybe not Evan's. Having functioning eyes is nice.

-Xomniac- Yeah, true. Maybe not Cross's, though, either. I mean, would you want to be horribly scarred from suffering millions upon millions of volts of lightning through your body?

-EvanAlmighty- Oof. So true. Still, being in One Piece, man? You don't even have to be a Straw Hat. You can start your own crew, see all kinds of neat things…

-Xomniac- Die a horrible death to a genocidal government.

-EvanAlmighty- Hey, man, dying young as a badass pirate beats dying young to covid. Or dealing with fucking climate change. Man, I'd give anything to be able to go there. Actually make a difference, you know?

-Xomniac- Hold on, why does this feel familiar?

* Rather Omniscient Bitch has entered the chat *

-Bodaciously Redonkulous Opportunistic Bullshitter- You rang?

-Xomniac- ...Fuck, that's why.

-Xomniac- ...Um... good luck, buddy?

-EvanAlmighty- …

-EvanAlmighty- …

-EvanAlmighty- ...Real funny, Xom.

* ReallyRealEvanSG has left the chat *

-Bodaciously Redonkulous Opportunistic Bullshitter- ...Huh.

-Bodaciously Redonkulous Opportunistic Bullshitter- ...Well, this is awkward. ...Don't suppose you want to actually become Cross?

-Xomniac- Fuck, no.

-Bodaciously Redonkulous Opportunistic Bullshitter- Then I have a runaway to catch~

~~☠~~

Annoyed, I slammed the screen of my Envy x 360 shut and folded my arms in front of my chest. Really, I didn't know what the hell Xom was thinking. Did he really think I'd appreciate him trolling me like that? I had no idea why he'd thought that would be amusing, but that was just rude. Adding someone named with those initials into our DMs while we were talking about being in One Piece?

I'm stupid, not an idiot.

Still grumbling to myself about it, I sighed, opened my laptop back up, pressed my pointer finger against its fingerprint scanner, and tapped my foot in boredom as I waited for all my automatic apps to load back up. I stared out the window at my Ohio landscape while my VPN reconnected to a Chicago server. I also purposefully forced Discord closed out of spite. When everything was ready, I pulled up YouTube.

Let's see… what to watch? Maybe some RuffSenpai or Semblance of Sanity? Nah, I wasn't feeling reaction videos today. Rational National? Politics were too depressing for my mood at the moment, so no. LinusTechTips? ...Well, that looked like an interesting new video, but I decided to save it for later.

GrandLineReview?

Sure, why not.

I hovered my arrow over the video, titled BEST and WORST One Piece Islands to Wake Up In and raised an eyebrow. That seemed like an interesting video idea. Shrugging to myself, I clicked on it, expecting the normal greeting from Liam only to stare at the skull and crossbones with the twisted grin on its face that took up the entire screen instead. I blinked rapidly in surprise. I didn't think I'd pressed fullscreen mode, what the heck? I tried scrolling my mouse around, but no arrow appeared.

My brows knitted in concern, which grew considerably as the skull and crossbones… rolled its eyes and started talking to me.

"Jeez, honestly, Evan, that was rude," it said in the voice of Johnny Depp, and I just stared.

"...The fuck?"

Okay, I must've had some seriously bad mushrooms or something. I again tried my mouse, but it still wouldn't work. Getting pretty nervous that my computer had been hacked, I hurriedly pressed the power button and held it down, but to my increasing horror, no matter how long I held it down, it wouldn't force a shut down.

Uh-oh.

"Yep, sorry, I'm real~!" Johnny Depp's voice sang through my laptop speakers. "Trying to run from an omniscient being, Evan, really? And a bastard one at that? You know better!"

"...Shitbiscuits," I mumbled, slumping back in my chair. "Let me guess, no time to prepare, time dilation, yada yada yada?"

"Oh, look, he knows something!"

My teeth ground together. My eye twitched. "You're a reeeaaaal fucking bastard, ya know that?"

The skull and crossbones' actual crossbones tilted up, and then back down. I got the feeling it might have been shrugging. "It IS in the name!" it shot right back, not missing a beat. Wondering what the fuck was even my life and what I'd done to deserve this, I groaned and cast my eyes up to the heavens wearily.

"Okay, look, you and I both know I was just fantasizing and I didn't actually mean it," I tried to reason with it, but it was not having any of that.

"Coooool, cool," it hummed. "Counterpoint: I don't care."

Grgrgkrkrgkrgggh…. "Can you just…" I sighed, squeezing my eyes shut. "Can you just please not drop me out of the sky?"

"If you want! But you won't get a Devil Fruit that way. Or a partner who has a Devil Fruit, depending on how much of a bitch I feel like being."

My hand slapped my forehead. "MOTHERFUCKER."

"AHAHAHAHA!"

"Fine, fine, just… just get it over with," I grumbled at last, accepting my fate. "You fucking asshoooooooollllllleee!" And right as I had started to say that last bit, my stomach dropped a mile as I became completely weightless for a brief, horrible moment. My eyes opened reflexively, and I stared in terror at the flawless blue sky above me before my free fall into the gates of Hell began.

The way I'd ended up in the air caused me to slowly flip over headfirst, and I noticed with no small terror the water quickly rushing up to meet me. Thank hell I hadn't ended up, like, miles in the air; I must've only been dropped like ten feet or something.

I had barely enough time to twist my body into an impromptu dive, ridiculously thankful that I'd had nine years on my local swim team, before I hit the water with an enormous KERSPLOOSH. I dove down deep, quickly angling my body upwards. I did not trust the seafloor's height level; if I'd been dropped near an island, it would likely be close enough to the surface of the water that my momentum might carry me down to the bottom.

My head burst out of the water seconds later, and the briny stench of seawater filled my nostrils as my mouth opened and I sucked in a desperate gasp of air. I tasted salt from the water dripping down my face, but I didn't care because holy shit, I was alive.

I treaded water, cursing the fact that I had been dropped into it while I was wearing my jeans and green t-shirt. They weighed me down, and my phone in my pocket was thankfully waterproof but wouldn't do me any good unless BROB had taken pity on me in the same way that he'd taken pity on Cross.

Thinking on that, I made a mental note to definitely keep an eye out for hungry snails if I still wanted to have access to the damn thing.

Once my heart had finally calmed down and wasn't in danger of beating out of my chest, I took the opportunity to spin myself around in the salty water, which felt brisk, but not chilly enough that I was worried about any danger. My eyes scanned for signs of land, which I didn't see until I'd started to reach a one-eighty. Relief filled me; the island was fairly close, within swimming distance. It'd be a hell of a swim, but I could make it.

Studying it, I couldn't tell what island it was, which was both worrying and somewhat a relief. It wasn't similar to any of the islands in canon One Piece, which meant I wouldn't have to deal with any of the problems associated with them. So that was good. On the down side, it also meant I might not be on the Straw Hats' path, or heck, I might not even be in the right Sea. I could be on the damn Grand Line for all I knew. Plus I would have to deal with whatever potential problems would be present on this island, without the benefit of foreknowledge.

It had a fairly normal-looking skyline; deciduous trees and rolling hills, a curved bay like a crescent moon, and several fields of wheat and other crops that I could spy on its hills. A village rested on the harbor, and some fishing boats were out and about closer inland. If I was lucky, this meant there weren't any Sea Kings around. If I was unlucky, it only meant that the fishermen and/or fisherwomen were strong enough to take out a Sea King without much effort.

Unfortunately, it didn't seem like any of them had noticed my fall. None of the ships were coming to get me.

"Damn you, ROB," I whined, then, resigning myself to this development, I took a deep breath and started swimming.

~~☠~~

A little over an hour later, I finally reached the shore and pulled myself out of the water. Thoroughly exhausted, I sank to my hands and knees in the warm, white sand, and promptly flopped over onto my back with a long groan.

"Never again," I wheezed, arms rebelling against me. They ached all over; and I lifted aluminum car parts for a living, so you know if my arms were tired, they were tired. "Never again, not once."

I allowed myself ten minutes of rest, and during this, I had time to consider my situation fully.

First, I was in One Piece. I had actually ended up in One Piece. It was the kind of thing I'd been dreaming of for years. I'd spent hours imagining different scenarios where this would happen and what I'd do, I knew for a fact that millions of other fans of the show had done the same thing, and here I was. An excited, nervous, and scared laugh burst out of my chest.

I almost choked on some salt water that was still dripping in my mouth, so after hacking and coughing it out, I decided against continuing with that.

Second, my phone worked. And the battery life read infinite, too, so, that was that. Guess I was getting the same basic starting gear Cross had. I discovered this fact after digging my phone out of my very heavy, water-logged jeans, which stuck to my legs uncomfortably.

Third, if I stayed out here in the sun too long, I'd get sunburn, so I needed to head into town and find a way to get myself lodging, actual money, and food. And information.

Maybe a person to train under, too, if I could find someone.

Getting to my feet, I wiped my brow and walked up the beach to the town. A slight breeze drifting through the air felt nice underneath the hot sun. As I reached the edge of town, I noticed that most of the buildings were either brick or wood.

Directly ahead of me were some docks, where a crew of men and women packed fish, clams, crabs, and other seafood into crates labeled Baratie in bold, simple font; some crates were labeled Loguetown. I let out a long sigh of relief. I was in the East Blue! At least now I had a general idea of where I was. I walked up to one of the fishermen and raised a dripping hand in greeting. I also breathed in the scent of the fish. Man, it smelled good. Weird, considering it was raw fish.

"Ahoy!" I called out to him, and he and his friends looked up at me oddly. "I don't know where I am. Can you tell me which island this is?"

I blinked a little bit and frowned. Did my voice sound weirdly high or was it just me? I'd always had a higher-than-average voice for a guy anyway… Maybe there was just salt caught in my throat or something.

The guy's eyebrows rose as he took in my appearance. "Uh, sure," he said slowly, blinking. "You're on Ventswell Reef."

"Oh," I muttered, rubbing my chin. Ventswell Reef… not a familiar name for sure, but I'll take it. "And, uh, what part of the East Blue am I in?"

Now I was getting some seriously weird stares. "How do you not know…?" the man started to say, but shook his head and evidently decided it wasn't worth the headache. "We're fairly close to Loguetown and Conomi Islands. Best stay away from Conomi, though. That's Arlong's territory."

Ah, now that was helpful. If Conomi was still considered Arlong's territory, either Arlong hadn't yet been defeated or news of his defeat hadn't yet reached outside ears.

"And would you happen to know where I can get some work?"

Exchanging glances with his friends, the fisherman shrugged. He was tall and broad shouldered, his skin tanned from years spent working in the sun. His biceps and triceps were huge. "Savant Dojo's been hiring for a janitor," he suggested, rubbing the back of his head. "It's a small pagoda in the center of town. Only building of its kind, really stands out. You can't miss it."

"Oh, thanks," I said, waving goodbye as I turned and headed into town.

With a goal in mind, I walked through town, taking in all the sights in awe. A part of me still couldn't believe all of this was happening, but it was so damn cool! I was in a town in the world of One Piece! As I marveled at it all, I happened to notice a bar on my left, and I paused, a thought crossing my mind.

I should probably go inside and check on the wanted posters, just in case. I could always stowaway on one of the cargo ships to Loguetown if need be.

Because I wanted to join the Straw Hats if possible, for sure.

Mind set, I nodded, entered the bar, and looked for the wanted posters. It seemed that the wall to the left was dedicated to them, so I made my way through the mess of tables and people sitting at them. Wrinkling my nose at the sharp scent of beer, I scanned the wanted posters for any sign of Luffy.

No dice.

That probably meant that Luffy hadn't defeated Arlong yet. Knowing this, I formed a plan: I'd train up at the Dojo, then hitch a ride to either Conomi Islands or Loguetown, if the Straw Hats didn't find me first.

I set back onto my original path. Five minutes later, I spotted my destination and jogged the rest of the way there. By this time, I was already a lot drier, except for my clothes, which were still completely soaked.

I knocked on the door to the pagoda, which looked odd in the middle of all these western-looking brick and wood buildings, and waited. A couple minutes later, it was opened by a man with blue hair, pink eyes, and… four arms?

I stared at his arms, blinking.

"Hello, there, stranger," the man said cheerfully. "How can I help you?"

I blinked again and shook myself out of my stupor. "Oh, uh, I'm here to apply for the janitor position," I said. "I woke up on the shore. I guess I was in the sea or something, because, well…" I waved my hands over my sopping clothes. "Anyway, I don't really remember much, and I need a job, a place to sleep, and money."

"Quite a story," the man said, sizing me up. "Well, you seem like a nice enough kid."

"It's been quite a day," I admitted, then frowned. "Also, I'm 22," I mumbled.

"Kid," he iterated smoothly, slapping me on the back with two arms. The force of the hit made me stumble forward with an oof of surprise. "Come on in, I can get you fixed up with some lunch and we can talk about things then."

Gratefully, I stepped inside after him. The back of my neck instantly felt much cooler now that the sun wasn't beating upon it.

Inside, I gazed at the center of the pagoda in awe; a bamboo matt floor stretched for about twenty feet, surrounded by a board walkway that had seating and a few tables here and there. On the left, a set of stairs rose up to the second floor. A sliding door had been fitted into the wall at the back of the room, and I wondered where it went. There must be a kitchen back there or something, because the four-armed man smiled at me, said, "Wait here, alright?" and quickly made his way back to it.

On the bamboo matt floor, a group of about thirty kids, teens, and adults stood in rows before a man wearing black martial arts robes. All of the students wore white robes. Some of them had four arms; some of them didn't. I swore I even saw a catperson and a dogperson.

Half-Minks, maybe? Law's North Blue-based crew had a bear Mink in it. It wouldn't be all that surprising if they had found their way to the East Blue, too.

Musing this odd sight, my ears perked when, twenty minutes later, I heard the door slide open, and my nose picked up the scent of cooked fish. My mouth watered, distracting me from the fact that normally my sense of smell was garbage thanks to my allergies constantly stuffing it up. The four-armed man emerged from the door, a plate of fish and glass of orange-colored juice in his hand. He brought these over to a table near me and smiled, motioning for me to come sit with him. I quickly did so.

"Man, that fish smells good," I gushed, eying it hungrily. It had only been a couple hours since I'd eaten last, but I'd also just swam for an hour. I was starving.

The man snorted in amusement, his eyes flicking up to the top of my head for some odd reason. "Thought you might like that," he said with an amused grin, and I sat down. He set the plate and cup in front of me, as well as some silverware. I dug in, nearly crying from how good it tasted.

"How did you know I would?" I asked after swallowing the absolutely succulent fish.

He snorted, again looking up at the top of my head. "Call it an educated guess," he said with a raised eyebrow as if that was a stupid question, and my enjoyment of the fish began to fade as suspicion rose within me.

Hold up a moment. Why did he keep glancing up like that?

...Higher than normal voice, better sense of smell, unusual enjoyment of fish, and wet shirts were heavy, but were they really that heavy…?

...ROB, I swear to the God I don't believe in, if this is even remotely what I think it is… I reached my hand up and felt at the top of my head. Fuzzy ears sat there, twitching as I touched them and noticed them for the first time.

Paling, I reached down and grabbed at my chest, feeling a softness and sensitivity that did not belong. Not as much softness as I'd expected to find, though, given the world I'd landed in and the artist who drew it and its characters.

Welp.

I was a damn catgirl.

"Goddammit, ROB," I whined, slamming my head into the table beside my plate with a heavy thunk. My phone pinged, and I slipped it out of my pocket to glance at it warily. A Discord message popped up on it with a ding.

Bodaciously Redonkulous Opportunistic Bullshitter
*Your suffering is my amusement~*

Okay, but, like, did it really have to be a catgirl? I groaned mentally, while the four-armed man in front of me just blinked in confusion.
Ding!

Bodaciously Redonkulous Opportunistic Bullshitter
*Consider this karma for all the fem-Cross omakes you wrote. What goes around comes around!*

...I knew that was gonna come back to bite me in the ass one day! Fuck! Well, I at least knew this new form wasn't a Devil Fruit, since I'd been able to swim and hadn't sunk to Davy Jones's Locker, so I must be a half-Mink. That was a relief, but… fucking periods, oh fuck.

Ding!

Bodaciously Redonkulous Opportunistic Bullshitter
*I actually gave you a little mercy. You won't have to go through those. Buuuuut I did take away something in return, though, so don't expect to be able to use Electro~*

...Okay, that was kind of helpful and a sacrifice I was willing to make to not have to suffer through periods, but I still wanted to kick his omnipotent ass out of spite. Seriously, if you were gonna turn me into a girl, you couldn't at least make me a busty Oda woman? I had to have average proportions?

Aw, man.

"Is something wrong?" my host asked, genuinely confused. "Who's Rob?"

"Don't worry about it," I deadpanned. "You're better off not knowing. Anyway, about the janitor position?"

He blinked and shrugged with four arms, which was weird to look at. "Ah, right. Well, what's your name? I don't think you introduced yourself."

My mind stammered as I tried to think of a name to use with my new body. "U-Uh, E… Eve. Eve Johnson."

"Are you fine waking up early in the morning? Like at around six o'clock?"

"Yeah, no problem."

"Know how to sweep, mop, and cook?"

"Yep, yep, and yep," I confirmed, nibbling on impossibly good fish.

"Able to lift fifty pounds?"

"Easy."

He grinned and gave me four thumbs-up. "Great, you're hired."

I blinked and stared, mouth hanging open a little. "Wait, really?" Was it that simple? I sat back in my chair, shaking my head in disbelief. Was this guy alright?

"Yep," he confirmed with a nod. "You can take one of the empty rooms on the third floor. The last janitor left it when he hopped islands, so it's yours. Lodging's free, so you don't have to worry about that. Your shift starts at six forty-five in the morning, breakfast is at six-thirty. You'll be done at two in the afternoon. We can get ya some new clothes too, if you want, since those look kind of ruined. Can't be comfortable with your tail, either."

I realized belatedly that yes, I did indeed have a tail, too, and it was very uncomfortable without a tail hole.

"Thanks," I said, still stunned at how easy it had been to get a job. Last time I'd gone on a job hunt, I'd went three weeks without a job.

"No problem," he laughed, clapping me on the shoulder. "Now go ahead and finish up your food and drink and go get a bath. You smell like a wet cat."

Still a bit shocked, I did as he said and took a moment to find the third-floor bathroom. I stripped my clothes off, blushing a little as I noticed my new body in all its glory, and sank into the tub.

My first day in One Piece…

A bubbly laugh rose up and out of my chest, grinning. Despite everything, I couldn't help but be excited. I put on some One Piece music and sat back in the tub, basking.

It's a pirate's life for me~

 

[TheRealEvanSG]

Chapter 2
The Troubles of Ventswell Reef​

After getting my bath and drying off, I found some fresh clothes lying just on the inside of the bathroom door. My host had apparently slipped them inside while I was bathing. The light blue Criminal shirt was a couple sizes too large for me and the bra didn't fit right, either, but the pants and panties sat well on me. I wondered where he'd gotten the clothes from, or if he'd bought them for me already.

I slipped my phone into the pocket of my new pants, leaving my old clothes hanging in the bathroom on the towel rack to dry. My new pants and panties had a hole in the back for my tail, which felt much more comfortable now that it wasn't forced to scrunch up against my back. Then I walked back downstairs. All of the students were gone, so lessons for the day must be over, at least for the class I'd seen.

My host sat at the table we'd sat at earlier, sipping some tea and reading a newspaper.

"Hey, thanks for the clothes," I said as I walked up to him. He glanced up and smiled.

"Don't worry about it," he told me. "Just do a good job tomorrow." He frowned. "Ah, I see the shirt I picked out for you at the store is too big. Good thing I got a few different sizes. I already set the bags of clothes for you in your bedroom. Don't worry, they won't come out of your paycheck."

Wow. This guy was really nice. I paused, though, as I suddenly realized I had no idea what his name was. "Oh, and sorry, could you tell me your name?" I asked, sitting back down at the table across from him. "And maybe some stuff about this island?"

"Sure." He gave me a four-armed shrug. "My name's Savant Ren. I run this dojo. I'm a member of this island's Four-Arm Tribe, as you can see." He raised all four of his hands, chuckling. "Hard to miss, huh? Anyway, Ventswell Reef also has another race native to it besides mine, but let's not talk about them."

Getting the sense that there was some bad blood there, I frowned, but nodded. "Alright. What style do you teach here at this dojo?"

"I like to call it the Floating Palm style," Ren said, gazing out over the dojo's training floor with a soft smile. "My dad taught it to me, and his dad taught it to him. It's been passed through the Savant family for generations. Apparently it was an ancient Wano technique; I don't know how true that is, though. There is historical precedence for Wano samurai and martial artists moving to the East Blue, but my grandpa always did like to exaggerate."

I thought back to the martial arts lessons earlier. Now I realized that all, or at least most, of their movesets had featured open-palmed attacks.

"Think you could teach me?"

I wasn't sure yet if my baseline durability had increased alongside my new Half-Mink body, but I didn't want to test that and would feel much more comfortable if I had a decent fighting style down. Plus it'd make me more valuable to the Straw Hats.

Ren took a sip of his tea, thinking over this. "Sure, I can give you lessons after the end of your shift," he decided, nodding. "You'll need a way to fight within a couple months anyway." The last part sounded more like was musing to himself than anything, but it still made me worried.

"Wait, what?" My eyes widened a little. "What do you mean?"

He frowned again. "You'll see," he said darkly, then sighed and smiled. "I can start your training now if you want. It's already three o'clock anyway, so you don't have any work to do."

"Oh, uh, sure." I nodded, surprised at just how accommodating this guy was. I also found it curious that his family apparently had ties to Wano if the Four-Arm Tribe was native to this island. Maybe one of his ancestors married into the Four-Arm Tribe? Mulling this over, I followed Ren as he got up and moved to the bamboo floor.

Ren stood in front of me on the bamboo floor, tall and strong. "Alright, now listen. The same way a swordsman should be able to cut through anything with impeccable grace, the concept of the Floating Palm is to gracefully strike through anything. No armor, no barrier should block your attack from landing."

My eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "How does that work, nya?" I asked.

"Everything has a rhythm," Ren said, slipping into a fighting stance. I examined his stance and tried to mimic it. "You must learn the rhythm of all things. Once you do… you can disrupt the rhythm."

"The rhythm of all things…" I muttered, frowning. That sounded an awful lot like the Voice of All Things. It also sparked a memory of the early days of One Piece, specifically Zoro's battle against Mister One. Hadn't he talked about a rhythm of all things before he cut steel for the first time?

Actually, thinking about it… Zoro's teacher, Shimotsuki Koushirou, had come from Wano, hadn't he? I hadn't caught up all the way to Wano, but I had read that somewhere. Or maybe watched a video about it? I didn't quite remember, but it rang a bell. The teaching was the same. Maybe that was a Wano-specific idea.

Maybe Ren's family did have connections to Wano after all.

"Teach me how to hear the rhythm of all things," I asked, and Ren grinned.

"I would, but everyone learns how to hear it in their own way," he replied. He rose his hands up, his left hand positioned upwards at his chest and his right palm facing me, just to the side of his eyes. "You must first master the techniques I am going to teach you. Then you will be prepared to discover the world's rhythm."

I matched his stance, or tried to anyway. He shook his head and tapped his left foot.

"Slide your foot back more, Eve," he told me. "About a couple inches more. Your tail may help your balance, but you'll still be knocked over if your weight distribution is out of whack."

I nodded and did so. "Like this?"

"Good," Ren approved. "Now, let's start with a few strikes…"

~~☠~~
​

I flopped to the floor with a weary groan.

Training. Sucked. Ass.

Turns out that BROB, the shithead, had decided not to give me a body that matched One Piece-level durability and endurance. Even the few hours of training I was given left my body sore and aching, which took Ren by surprise. He decided to end the session early to allow me to rest, after putting me through some basic physical endurance training. He DID warn me that after this more basic physical endurance training, he'd be upping the ante to get me up to speed, which… had me worried.

I wallowed in self-pity on the floor of the pagoda for a moment, then realized I'm in friggin' One Piece. Why the heck am I feeling sorry for myself in the most badass world imaginable?

I got up and decided to go sightseeing. Thankfully, Ren had decided to give me some spare money that I'd have to pay him back later to grab something to eat or whatever I wanted to do with it.

As I walked around the town, I noticed more people with twice the usual amount of arms. There seemed to be a pretty even mix of them with normal humans… Maybe leaning a little toward the Four-Armed Tribe side. I was astounded that I hadn't noticed it earlier. Maybe it was because my mind had still been trying to process everything that had happened to me. In any case, everyone seemed happy enough, but an air of tension also hung in the air, especially among the Four-Armed Tribe citizens.

"Only a couple months left…" I heard one of them, a shortstack woman sigh to a man nearly twice her height.

The man grunted and frowned into the distance. "Better look into getting supplies from the other islands for fortifying the walls…" he mumbled.

Fortifying the walls? A couple months left? I remembered Ren saying that I'd need to learn to fight within a couple months. Were they expecting some sort of battle? Brow furrowing, I stepped over to them and asked, "Why would the walls need fortifying?"

They stared at me. "Well, the Four-Eyed Tribe is due to come attack in two months," the woman said slowly, like she couldn't quite believe anyone didn't already know this. "We've been in a war with them for years. And in two months is our Sea Bounty Festival…" She trailed off, and noticing the look of confusion on my face, clarified. "It's a celebration to the sea gods for good luck in our harvest of food from the sea. Happens annually."

"They usually don't attack us on the Festival," the man muttered, "but I guess their prince is missing and they're accusing our Tribe of kidnapping him. Thing is, none of us ever touched him before. So they were trying to be secret about it, but word is they'll burn the village down on the eve of the Festival."

"Burn the village down…?" My eyes widened in horror. "What!? Isn't that a bit excessive!?"

The woman shrugged. "You'd think so, but I hear they're dealing with pirates," she spat out. "It seems they've gotten a bit desperate to get their dear prince back."

"Oh, that sucks," I said, rubbing the back of my head. "How do you know all this anyway?"

The two looked at each other in surprise. "You didn't know?" the man asked skeptically. "Savant Dojo's Master Savant spread the news."

Savant Dojo? Ren? What all did that mean? Guess Ren was more in the know than I'd thought.

Thanking them and walking away, I mulled over the information I'd just learned. Other than the information about Ren, it… honestly did not surprise me this island had two races at war with each other. I should have expected ROB to drop me on an island like this. And of course pirates were involved somehow. Could anything bad in the One Piece world really happen without it involving pirates in some way?

I wandered back to the bar I'd visited earlier, the one with the bounty posters. I grabbed myself a chair and waited, drumming my fingers against the table. After a server came to take my order as well as give me a glass of water, I took out my phone and played some chess against the app's CPU. I wanted to play against other people, but sadly, ROB did that whole time dilation thing when I'd dropped into this world. Time was essentially frozen in my world until whatever time I'd return, if I even survived that long. This also meant that the internet was essentially frozen in time. Facebook would never update. My YouTube feed would never update. I wouldn't get any new information, and I couldn't play against other people online.

I put my phone away as I noticed a waitress arriving with my food, a hamburger and fries because apparently those existed in this world, and I topped off my fries with some vinegar before digging in.

As I was eating my hamburger, I looked out the window, enjoying the sight, until something odd caught my eye. I noticed a young man with a purple diamond-patterned headband wrapped around his head stalking around a stall selling some various vegetables ― cabbages, daikons, lettuce, even some cucumbers. His windswept hair was dark blue, his eyes purple like his headband. He stood at a taller height than most of the people on the street who walked by him, and I guessed he was over six feet tall. Maybe close to seven.

Creeping around the side of the stall, out of view of the stall owner, he looked side to side. Then, evidently assured no one was looking his way, he leaned out in front of the stall just far enough to grab hold of a cabbage when the stall owner wasn't paying attention. He yanked it away, causing some cabbages to tumble off the pile and over the floor. My eyes widened a little and I got up quickly, slapping some money on the table.

"Does this cover it?" I asked the bartender, who stared in surprise at me and glanced at the money, then slowly nodded.

I raced out the door. "Thanks for the food!" I shouted.

Outside, the shop owner just noticed the cabbages on the ground, and jerked in surprise. "OH, MY CABBAGES!" he shrieked as the man with the purple headband quickly power walked through the crowd. He seemed to have stuffed the stolen cabbage under his jacket, because his arm was curled under a huge bulge in it. I narrowed my eyes and rushed after him.

People on the street looked at me oddly as I pushed by them, my shoulders and elbows bumping into them without much of a care. As I approached the thief, I stopped being so rough and walked along the street like a normal person. I knew how little power I had compared to the average person in this world. My advantage would be lost if I drew his attention. My tail lifted and stiffened as my ears twitched, and my eyes dilated as I crouched down instinctively. Then I pounced.

The man fell forward with a yelp when my body hit him hard. We both tumbled to the ground, my arms wrapping around him as I tried to wrestle him down. "Hey, what the ― let me go!" he grunted, trying to elbow me off him.

"Not happening!" I said, wrapping my elbow around his neck as I put him in a choke hold. "Why did you steal that cabbage?"

"I'm hungry, dammit!" He twisted around and shoved his hand against my stomach. I choked in pain from the hit as it drove into me, and I was launched back ten feet. Air rushed by me as my vision swam, and a few people on the street had to lurch away to avoid being knocked over alongside me. I slammed into the dirt road hard, rolling to a stop and coughing in pain as I held my stomach. Tears built up in my eyes; fucking ow.

The thief staggered to a stand, apparently surprised at the fact that I'd been sent flying. He furrowed his brow worriedly at me as blood trickled down my chin; I'd bit my lip accidentally, and it hurt but wasn't bad. I started to pick myself up, but by the time I did, he had already skedaddled.

"Why did you do that?" someone in the street worriedly asked, rushing over to me. My eyes glanced to the side to see a normal human woman, eyes glancing over me. "And how did you get sent flying like that? It didn't look like he punched you very hard…"

"He was a thief!" I said, turning back as I returned to scanning the crowd for any sign of his blue hair. "He stole one of that merchant's cabbages. And he was acting weird, too."

I looked back and forth, but he was long gone. I sighed and rubbed my stomach. Seriously, ow.

Well, I had to take this L. Trying to play the hero fucked me over today.

...That had been pretty stupid in hindsight.

I stumbled back to the dojo. At least now I knew for sure I needed this training.

~~☠~~​

Three weeks later, I had several regrets.

First, I regretted ever making that wish to go to One Piece. This world was hostile to Earth humans. I'd gone on a fishing trip with a friend of Ren's and nearly shat my pants when a Sea King erupted out of Ventswell Reef's bay, water cascading down its leathery skin as it glared at our boat with evil red eyes. The damn sea monster had been so massive! It had only been thanks to the fact that my dojo master's friend had been a Marine captain in his heyday (I wondered what the story behind that was) that we managed to escape.

Second, I regretted not exercising more back on Earth. I'd never been overweight and had always been perfectly healthy, but I never really worked out. And that translated over to my new body. Which led to my third regret.

Accepting training in this goddamn dojo.

"I really, really doubt… this is a good way… to increase someone's strength…!" I panted as I stood under a waterfall, a metal bar lugged over my shoulders with hecking boulders tied to each end. My legs wobbled as my muscles screamed. I'd gotten done with Ren's 'basic physical endurance training' so he'd moved me on to the more intensive stuff

"Nonsense!" Ren Savant barked, grinning savagely. "This is how my master trained me, and my master's master trained him, and my master's master's master―"

"YOU'RE ALL A BUNCH OF CRAZY LUNATICS AND I'M A NORMAL PERSON, THAT'S NOT RELEVANT HERE," I exploded, the physical stress making my patience wear thin.

Ren just threw his head back and laughed. "YATAHTAHTAH! That's the spirit! Take all that frustration and turn it into lifting power!"

My poor tail drooped down, ridiculously heavy thanks to the water pelting my skin as it rushed over a cliff above me. "MY MUSCLES ARE FRIGGIN' KILLING ME, YOU FOUR-ARMED MENACE."

"Yahtahtahtah!"

One Piece and its damn laughter… I physically couldn't laugh without going Nyayayaya and it annoyed me with how cute it was. It also annoyed me that I couldn't drop this bar of weights, because if I did…

..."YOU CALL THOSE CATLIKE REFLEXES!?" Ren roared as he tossed freaking coconuts at me, coconuts that he threw so hard they smashed into rocks on the edge of the beach behind me and left smoking craters in said rocks. "MY GRANDMA MOVES QUICKER THAN THAT ON A SATURDAY NIGHT AFTER GETTING HERSELF DRUNK!"

"I THOUGHT YOU WERE A NICE, CALM, QUIET PERSON!" I yelped as I leaped aside, narrowly avoiding a coconut that soared past my face. "JESUS CHRIST, YOU ALMOST HIT ME WITH THAT ONE!" I squeaked and flung myself to the ground underneath a ballistic coconut. "AND THAT ONE, TOO!"

"I WAS A DRILL SERGEANT FOR THE MARINES IN MY PRIME! And I didn't almost hit you, you just almost didn't dodge it!"

...Oh, that explained the Marine ex-captain friend, but also ― "Fuck you, that's the same thing!"

"Yahtahtahtah!"

And if I got too tired dodging coconuts…

…"One, two, one, two, one, two. Keep the pace, Eve!" Ren chanted as I struck my arms out in fluid motions.

My chest heaved, and I was thankful for bras. It would've been really embarrassing if they'd jiggled, even though we were back in the pagoda and no one else was around but us. "Oh… screw… off…" I grumbled, eye twitching. "I'm… fucking… exhausted… Give me… a fucking… break…"

"If you have energy to cuss like a sailor, you have the energy to move like a sailor!" came Ren's snappy retort, the four armed man grinning as he open-palm punched… Punched? Is that the word you use for that? Slap? Slapped the air ahead of him. "Now come on, we're still only on strike three hundred and ten! We still have plenty to go to reach five hundred! And I want them all perfect!"

I threw my head back and groaned. "AGGGGH."

Needless to say, by the end of the week, I was so exhausted I passed out Friday afternoon and slept clear to six o'clock in the evening on Saturday. By then, I felt much more refreshed. Between the physical training I'd been put through as well as the actual martial arts training, I'd actually gotten surprisingly stronger. At the very least, it took Ren longer to mop the floor with me, so that was something? I think?

Still, I hadn't expected my body to get much stronger just by nearly killing me through training, but then again, this is a manga world. And I technically had a Half-Mink body. Even if I'd started out at base Earth human strength regardless, now being at slightly-above-base One Piece human strength felt good.

"Alright, now that your physical strength is better and you have more of the motions down, let's start focusing on your Floating Palm techniques," Ren decided that morning over breakfast as we watched the dojo students.

I perked up. "Really?"

He nodded, smiling. "You've come a long way, Eve. You should feel proud."

I blushed and rubbed the back of my head, chuckling. "Nyayayaya! You're so different in your normal personality from your drill sergeant one," I said, cracking my back and then rolling my neck to crack it, too.

"You think so?" Ren laughed. "I had some pretty dumb students back in the day. Had to learn how to get them off their asses and―"

To my surprise, at that moment the door flung open, and a man with… blue hair… and a purple headband and eyes spilled through it… panting…

"Ren, you've gotta warn the villagers!" the man shouted, all the students and trainers pausing in their katas to look at him in surprise. "I've just found out the Spiketooth Pirates' Devil Fruit! It's the…" He trailed off, eyes falling on me and we both just kind of stared at each other in surprise.

Then we both pointed at each other. "WAIT, IT'S YOU!"

Ren, baffled, looked between us slowly. "You two know each other?" he said, shaking his head. "Small island, huh? Well, come on in, Jett, and why don't you get me caught up?"

"But ― but he's a thief!" I stammered, looking from Ren to… Jett in surprise. "Why would you let him in? And how do you know each other!?"

"Jett is… a son of a childhood friend," he said slowly, wincing. "I can see you're caught up in this too… but give us some time alone, okay? I promise I'll explain everything you need to know later."

I frowned, not liking that at all, especially the implication there was more he wouldn't be telling me, but nodded and folded my arms. "...Alright, fine."

"Thank you for trusting me, Eve."

Jett's eyes studied me warily. "I guess she's a student of yours, then, Ren?"

"Took her on just after ol' Gus quit," Ren sighed, leading Jett upstairs. "Come on, Jett, let's get you away from all these prying eyes."

I stared after them, shaking my head.

Just what the heck had I gotten myself into?