Dependency Day
Mr Zoat
Dedicated ragequitter
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- Dec 1, 2016
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Dependency Day
My bed feels soft. Did I go to sleep on top of the duvet? Stars? Did I leave the blinds open? I try to turn to the clock, but there's just more stars? I wake up pretty much instantly at that point and OH SHIT THAT'S THE EARTH! I see the Earth and it's a long way away and I'm breathing? I bring my hands up to my face. No, no space suit. I see the Earth and I'm breathing and I'm not cold or hot and there's no space suit? I'm in space. What?
There's something glowing on my left hand. I don't wear rings but I now have one on my ring finger? It's orange. In fact, I'm orange. I'm glowing orange. I hold my hand up to my eyes and-
-AAAAaaaauuhhhh!?
That's an orange power ring. I'm being kept alive in space by an orange power ring. Well I… I suppose I've never felt suicidal, so that much makes sense. I poke my other arm. Yes, definitely flesh, I haven't been turned into a construct. I don't seem to feel the overwhelming avarice that comes from the orange central power battery, so I guess this is one of the other rings? One of the ones that Larfleeze keeps in his cave? Does he know it's gone?
Fucking stupid. It's Larfleeze. Of course he knows it's gone.
Alright. I'm calming down. As long as I want to remain alive, I will. I can probably fly by wanting to move. I want to move.
Did I move? I can't tell. I don't seem to have moved relative to the Earth, but the Earth is very big and I wasn't trying to move that far. I don't want to go anywhere in particular. I'm still wearing my pyjamas; I can't go out in public like this. Pyjamas?
I look down to check that I am still wearing pyjamas. Yep, with an added orange lantern corps emblem on the chest. Guess the ring just changes whatever I wear to something thematically appropriate? Shouldn't it have generated an actual uniform?
I'm going to assume that that Earth isn't my Earth. If power rings actually existed and this one had come for me it would have found me in my bed. Unless I was dreaming about flying in space? I don't remember doing that and I don't remember seeing a ring choose a sleeping wearer in the comics. Would that work?
Huh. If that actually is DC Earth down there then I'm going to be the most out of shape Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Something happened. Everything's blurry. I think I'm standing on something, but I don't pay attention because everything hurts too much! My arms. My chest. My abdomen, my teeth, my eyes! How do eyes even hurt? They're watering and I'm blinking and gasping and all I can see is a creamy white colour and more black. I hug my arms to my chest and bend over. Oh, aagh, it's not just the pain, everything feels the wrong shape. The pain is being caused by something I can't fix. I don't want to-.
And it stops. My body still sort of tingles, like I've just gone from somewhere warm into somewhere cold and the veins in my skin are trying to decide whether to contract or not. But the pain is gone. My body still feels wrong though. I need to see-.
A thin orange line extends straight in front of me from the ring. At about four meters it stops and spreads right, as if someone was pouring liquid into a mould, only the mould is filling from the top left rather than the bottom. My first construct is a mirror. Sort of. Obviously it isn't reflecting anything, it's making an image of what it would reflect. It actually has a construct frame with a bevelled edge and is about three meters by two in size.
Wow. I'm looking good.
I've never been properly fat or anything, but I've never really taken to physical exercise and, well, no sense lying about it, I have been carrying a little weight about the stomach. Not any more. My arms are now about twice their earlier width. My shoulders are broader. My chest -I roll up my pyjama top- goodness, I have abs! I've never had abs! I run a hand over them. Huh, those don't feel like I was expecting. My chest hair is gone -wait, check- along with most of my other body hair. That feels weird. Feels kind of sticky. My face -the mirror shrinks and moves closer- is pretty much the same. My nose is a little straighter and if I can see this clearly my short sightedness has been fixed. No visible hair on my chin. Skin clarity appears to have improved. The hair on the top of my head is shorter. Looks like something Hugh Grant had in his prime, but longer at the back. Not sure how it's staying where it is. It should be flopping all over the place. Teeth are improved as well. Evenly sized, shaped and in good condition. I think I also look younger? Maybe, it's hard to tell when the image is orange.
I wave my hand and the construct dissipates. And that's when I realise that I'm STANDING ON THE MOON. Grey dust and rock all around and the Earth is visible in the sky. It's too much. I'm in a place only a handful of humans have ever been and my response is to drop to the ground, staring at the sky.
I'm sitting on the moon watching the Earth. I think the ring just rebuilt my body based on how I ideally want to look. Which really hurt. It must have been transmuting new muscle from existing fat. Or maybe even just making more meat from orange power? Should I feel bad about that? Doesn't everyone want to look a bit better than they do?
Shit. This isn't a dream. I never feel pain in dreams. And not enough is going on. I'm actually here and I have to deal with it.
Plan. Plan plan plan plan. Okay, first. Check that this isn't my Earth. I need to go home to do that. If there's another me here it's going to be weird, but I'm a fairly reasonable guy. DC comics don't really show much outside the US so I don't know if the places I've lived in will actually be there if I've somehow entered a comic reality. I can't plan anything else until I know where I am.
Now, how do I get there?
I stand back up. I go to brush off my legs because the dirt has coated everything it touched. Then I remember I'm wearing a power ring and I like being clean. A ring of orange passes over my body and the dust falls slowly away. As the ring reaches my feet I float a little off the ground. No sense getting dirty again just after cleaning myself. Now that's done, how to get to Earth? I have to want it to happen but I'm mostly just feeling apprehension about what I'll find when I get there.
Anal retentiveness to the rescue!
It's late at night and I have to be up for work tomorrow. I need to get to sleep and the best place for that is in bed! On Earth! If I don't then my schedule will be completely messed up. It's working! My need for regularity is controlling the flight!
Now to find somewhere familiar and see if it exists.
My bed feels soft. Did I go to sleep on top of the duvet? Stars? Did I leave the blinds open? I try to turn to the clock, but there's just more stars? I wake up pretty much instantly at that point and OH SHIT THAT'S THE EARTH! I see the Earth and it's a long way away and I'm breathing? I bring my hands up to my face. No, no space suit. I see the Earth and I'm breathing and I'm not cold or hot and there's no space suit? I'm in space. What?
There's something glowing on my left hand. I don't wear rings but I now have one on my ring finger? It's orange. In fact, I'm orange. I'm glowing orange. I hold my hand up to my eyes and-
-AAAAaaaauuhhhh!?
That's an orange power ring. I'm being kept alive in space by an orange power ring. Well I… I suppose I've never felt suicidal, so that much makes sense. I poke my other arm. Yes, definitely flesh, I haven't been turned into a construct. I don't seem to feel the overwhelming avarice that comes from the orange central power battery, so I guess this is one of the other rings? One of the ones that Larfleeze keeps in his cave? Does he know it's gone?
Fucking stupid. It's Larfleeze. Of course he knows it's gone.
Alright. I'm calming down. As long as I want to remain alive, I will. I can probably fly by wanting to move. I want to move.
Did I move? I can't tell. I don't seem to have moved relative to the Earth, but the Earth is very big and I wasn't trying to move that far. I don't want to go anywhere in particular. I'm still wearing my pyjamas; I can't go out in public like this. Pyjamas?
I look down to check that I am still wearing pyjamas. Yep, with an added orange lantern corps emblem on the chest. Guess the ring just changes whatever I wear to something thematically appropriate? Shouldn't it have generated an actual uniform?
I'm going to assume that that Earth isn't my Earth. If power rings actually existed and this one had come for me it would have found me in my bed. Unless I was dreaming about flying in space? I don't remember doing that and I don't remember seeing a ring choose a sleeping wearer in the comics. Would that work?
Huh. If that actually is DC Earth down there then I'm going to be the most out of shape Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
Something happened. Everything's blurry. I think I'm standing on something, but I don't pay attention because everything hurts too much! My arms. My chest. My abdomen, my teeth, my eyes! How do eyes even hurt? They're watering and I'm blinking and gasping and all I can see is a creamy white colour and more black. I hug my arms to my chest and bend over. Oh, aagh, it's not just the pain, everything feels the wrong shape. The pain is being caused by something I can't fix. I don't want to-.
And it stops. My body still sort of tingles, like I've just gone from somewhere warm into somewhere cold and the veins in my skin are trying to decide whether to contract or not. But the pain is gone. My body still feels wrong though. I need to see-.
A thin orange line extends straight in front of me from the ring. At about four meters it stops and spreads right, as if someone was pouring liquid into a mould, only the mould is filling from the top left rather than the bottom. My first construct is a mirror. Sort of. Obviously it isn't reflecting anything, it's making an image of what it would reflect. It actually has a construct frame with a bevelled edge and is about three meters by two in size.
Wow. I'm looking good.
I've never been properly fat or anything, but I've never really taken to physical exercise and, well, no sense lying about it, I have been carrying a little weight about the stomach. Not any more. My arms are now about twice their earlier width. My shoulders are broader. My chest -I roll up my pyjama top- goodness, I have abs! I've never had abs! I run a hand over them. Huh, those don't feel like I was expecting. My chest hair is gone -wait, check- along with most of my other body hair. That feels weird. Feels kind of sticky. My face -the mirror shrinks and moves closer- is pretty much the same. My nose is a little straighter and if I can see this clearly my short sightedness has been fixed. No visible hair on my chin. Skin clarity appears to have improved. The hair on the top of my head is shorter. Looks like something Hugh Grant had in his prime, but longer at the back. Not sure how it's staying where it is. It should be flopping all over the place. Teeth are improved as well. Evenly sized, shaped and in good condition. I think I also look younger? Maybe, it's hard to tell when the image is orange.
I wave my hand and the construct dissipates. And that's when I realise that I'm STANDING ON THE MOON. Grey dust and rock all around and the Earth is visible in the sky. It's too much. I'm in a place only a handful of humans have ever been and my response is to drop to the ground, staring at the sky.
I'm sitting on the moon watching the Earth. I think the ring just rebuilt my body based on how I ideally want to look. Which really hurt. It must have been transmuting new muscle from existing fat. Or maybe even just making more meat from orange power? Should I feel bad about that? Doesn't everyone want to look a bit better than they do?
Shit. This isn't a dream. I never feel pain in dreams. And not enough is going on. I'm actually here and I have to deal with it.
Plan. Plan plan plan plan. Okay, first. Check that this isn't my Earth. I need to go home to do that. If there's another me here it's going to be weird, but I'm a fairly reasonable guy. DC comics don't really show much outside the US so I don't know if the places I've lived in will actually be there if I've somehow entered a comic reality. I can't plan anything else until I know where I am.
Now, how do I get there?
I stand back up. I go to brush off my legs because the dirt has coated everything it touched. Then I remember I'm wearing a power ring and I like being clean. A ring of orange passes over my body and the dust falls slowly away. As the ring reaches my feet I float a little off the ground. No sense getting dirty again just after cleaning myself. Now that's done, how to get to Earth? I have to want it to happen but I'm mostly just feeling apprehension about what I'll find when I get there.
Anal retentiveness to the rescue!
It's late at night and I have to be up for work tomorrow. I need to get to sleep and the best place for that is in bed! On Earth! If I don't then my schedule will be completely messed up. It's working! My need for regularity is controlling the flight!
Now to find somewhere familiar and see if it exists.