Cu-nosuba: God’s Blessing on This Lancer’s Holy Grail War!

[alextheconqueror]

The orange makes sense.

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The Dangerous beast outfit is very popular even outside FGO

I should probably try to salvage Alaya in another ending.

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Good luck with that, she just keeps shooting herself in the feet

You want to know something for canon Konosuba aqua is actually was good at her job in the divine realm to get people to isekai to the konsuba world that when she became kazuma item and was brought to the mortal realm. The replacement couldn't get a single person to isekai so Kazuma is the last isekai hero for that world.

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I know, and that's soo Aqua, she became very competent when you don't expect her to be competent

 

[Davos]

The Dangerous beast outfit is very popular even outside FGO


Good luck with that, she just keeps shooting herself in the feet


I know, and that's soo Aqua, she became very competent when you don't expect her to be competent

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For good reason, right along the Halloween outfit Nightengale wore.

That's why I said the next one...too far a hole to make her look good now.

 

[alextheconqueror]

For good reason, right along the Halloween outfit Nightengale wore.

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There's also Succubus Irisviel, damm FGO really knows how to satiate the audience

That's why I said the next one...too far a hole to make her look good now.

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Understandable, this one is in fraud watch since day one

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Moments before the tragedy

 

[Davos]

There's also Succubus Irisviel, damm FGO really knows how to satiate the audience

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Completely forgot about that CE...

 

[alextheconqueror]

Completely forgot about that CE...

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There's just so much peak in Fate

 

[Davos]

Emiya has done many distasteful things as a Counter Guardian.

He has done many stupid things as well.

Most the result from dealing with the unconsciousness of Humanity, but he has accepted that a long time ago. He may not be happy with much of it, but he has begrudgingly come to terms with it.

"Comrade!" Darnic says cheerfully.

'I refuse to accept this!'

But the chain looping around his neck stops him from killing the Nazi.

"I'll save you as soon as I-"

"How the Hell did you become a Counter Guardian?!" Aqua shouts, making Darnic stop and look at her, now pulling out a second luger.

"You…!"

'…Honestly, Nazi or not, I can't even blame him for going for revenge…Though how the Hell did he become a Counter Guardian!?' Emiya thinks as the chain tightens.

===

"Why the Hell did you make him a Counter Guardian?!" Kazuma asks the pulsating rip, ignoring the low moans and questionable sounds coming from it.

"Only one third of that is my- Hng~…fault…maybe half…reasoning is hard for me right now…" Alaya says in a sweet, if weaker voice.

"How do you figure that? I doubt Eris said this was a good idea!"

"That coward- not there~!...like the rest of Heaven and other conceptual beings…have a very l—oooo~…low…standard…for recruiting help…just look at yourself for proof, you slow killer of the Demon King~. Not like I need to mention the other guys Aqua sent over…" Alaya says with a dozen voice breaks.

"Don't insult me! I sent over lots of heroes! But more importantly…can you help me?" Aqua says as Darnic approaches.

"How can you say anything about a low standard? And don't call Eris a coward!"

"Maybe I wouldn't if she didn't have two angels holding her up in the air away from Fergus!" Alaya shouts before a fleshy smack sounds out, making her whimper before feebly continuing.

"I'm not going anywhere near him!" Eris shouts from further away.

"As for the other two reasons…It's hard to think clearly with Fergus here…and the Nazi made some good points…"

"What possible points could he had made?" Rin asks.

"Unlike the last 5 I sent, he can follow orders~."

"Him following orders is his worst trait!" Kazuma shouts.

"Die you blue horror!" Darnic shouts while shooting at a crying Aqua.

"Not sure he even has that now…Is this what humans call lying at the interview?" Alaya says while biting back a moan.

"If anyone is going to kill her it is me!" Shirou the priest says, throwing a black key at Darnic. He readies another blade but stops when Darnic raises his hands in mock surrender.

"…I am more than willing to oblige your attempt on my life. But surely you share my ill will at this blue woman?"

"What are you suggesting?"

"A short truce until we kill her. We both have cause enough for earlier, so why not remove her together? Then we can continue our prior fight without interruption from the divinely dull."

"…I hate you, but you make a good point." Shirou says, prompting Darnic to smile and Aqua to cry before running away. The temporary allies give chase, on their way to kill a God.

"Told you, he makes good points…and compared to you and Emiya, he has more of a skill set at the start, being both a skilled mage and disciplined military officer…Oh thank Heaven he's finally slowing down!" Alaya says with a smile.

"Dealing with Vlad and the one Emiya must have tired me out more than I thought…" Fergus says.

"Create Water." Kazuma says, filling a large water bottle.

"W-what are you…" Alaya whimpers out, a fear making her voice crack further.

"Here you go Fergus. It's full of mana so you should be able to keep going with this."

"WHAT?!"

"Thanks lad!"

"No no no no I'm already scatter brained on a good day, if you give him that I'll completely-" Alaya groans at seeing the bottle handed to Fergus, who drinks it one long swallow, completely revitalized, and howling with salacious intent as Alaya crumbles from the renewed pacing.

Rin looks on neutrally with red cheeks along with Jeanne.

Darkness is smiling.

Megumin is judging.

Shakespeare takes notes; Avicebron judges Shakespeare and his note taking.

Servant Kazuma fills another water bottle and tosses it into the rift, eliciting another squeal of blissful sounding horror.

'…Since one of these Kazuma's is a servant, does that mean he could…But how can I be-' Rin thinks while suppressing a grin.

"Since you are a Servant, does that mean you can give yourself water and infinitely replenish your stamina?" Jeanne asks, shocking Rin.

"Huh…I don't know actually. Probably? I'll have to try that out sometime." Kazuma the Servant says.

'Yes!' Rin and Jeanne think at the same time.

'…At least you're not calling it a sign…hopefully it works on Sieg too.' Leticia thinks, making Jeanne glance away.

"…Can you give me my damn trench coat back?" Ritsuka asks, still covering herself with her arms.

"But you look amazing!" Medea says.

"Indeed you do Senpai~." Mash says with a grin.

'I'll have vengeance for this Mash…'

'We both know you won't stop at dressing me up. Don't use this as a pretense.' Mash thinks back as Kazuma hands the trench coat back while looking to the ceiling and Ritsuka quickly dresses herself, frowning as Medea takes more pictures.



===

Scathach lobs a rune on the chain, symbols appearing on the chain around Emiya's neck before it grows slack.

"…Figures there is another mongrel with a method of counteracting my chains. I'll just have to deal with you f-"

"ARRRTHUR!" Lancelot shouts, making Gilgamesh grimace, before relaxing when he sees him attacking Mordred.

Then he startles.

"You mad dog, she is mine!" Gilgamesh shouts as Lancelot sends Mordred into a wall. He looks over at Gilgamesh and slowly raises a hand, beckoning Gilgamesh to come closer. Gilgamesh grits his teeth, before having to deflect a thrown blade and spear at him.

Artoria lands with a slashing cut aimed for Lancelot's head, narrowly missing the enraged knight.

"If anyone is going to kill my son, it will be me!"

"Father!"

"You...have no say…anymore…Arthuuuur!" Lancelot says with a neck crack as he slams his blade towards Artoria, making a crater appear. A quickly summoned beast lunges for Artoria, only to be stabbed and tossed aside from Mordred.

'I absolutely hate this bizarre loyalty of hers…' Semiramis thinks before being grabbed by the neck and hefted up by Gilgamesh.

"Poisoner, we're you just trying to kill Artoria?"

"She cut off my arm!" Semiramis gargles out, prompting Shirou to look at her arms while Gilgamesh languidly raises a free hand to fire a barrage at Scathach to keep her away.

"It got better…"

"I am the bone of my sword…" The other Emiya begins, and Artoria hears this while deflecting another mad slash from Lancelot. She pulls back at the last second of another attack, making Lancelot temporarily off balanced.

"Now!" Artoria shouts and Mordred helps her toss Lancelot towards Gilgamesh.

"Unlimited Blade Works!" Emiya says, encasing the 6 of them of them in his reality marble.

"Fool…Even your Reality Marble cannot completely nullify the effects of my Noble Phantasm…! Your fame is effectively gone here!"

"I never had any fame to begin with!" Emiya answers back, making Gilgamesh laugh hard enough to drop Semiramis.

"And this isn't the first time I bested a Caster in their domain!"

"I am not a-!"

"…I have doubts your Noble Phantasm can truly turn the tide." Scathach says.

"Thankfully we have a new ally…~." Emiya says with a smirk, making Scathach raise an eyebrow as Emiya continues.

"Hey Lancelot!" Emiya shouts, making the deranged knight look his way.

"That squire is carrying your king's sheath." He says pointing at his younger self.

"What?" The younger Emiya asks as Lancelot looks at him before howling.

"Oh no…" Shirou and Gilgamesh say the same time as Lancelot charges them.

"…Not valorous, but I can appreciate quick thinking. You earned a story."

"How kind of you." Emiya says, getting another chuckle from Scathach.

Cu feels another pit in his stomach, slowing him enough to be grabbed and thrown by Atalanta.

'What is this terrible feeling…?' Cu wonders before shaking his head and resuming the fight.



====



Aqua turns around a corner, Shirou and Darnic quickly going around before stopping in their tracks.

Aqua is hiding behind Darkness.

"We need to be care-" Shirou starts but stops when Darnic raises his gun and shoots Darkness.

Shirou looks at Darnic flatly before coughing into his hand.

"Relax, I have it set to stun. Alaya made these for me so I wouldn't kill innocent people. She might be in pain but she'll li-"

"Oh yes~."

"What?" Darnic asks while looking at Darkness approach, smiling and panting. Darnic and Shirou step back.

"Please…empty everything from your gun into me…~"

'Oh Lord, the pervert even scares a Nazi…'

'Oh God…she must be a servant like Spartacus!'

"You distract her and I'll kill the blue thing." Darnic says.

"No, she's already disturbed me for one life time…you distract her." Shirou says.

"To be so quickly rejected for even violence…so…intoxicating~." Darkness says with a bit of drool.

Shirou and Darnic shake their fists three times.

Both pick paper.

Darkness groans before breaking into a run.

They in turn run away.



===



Chiron and Achilles continue running until they near an edge.

"Maybe we should try restraining her?"

"I'm sure that's what she wants…" Chiron says with a groan as Fiore approaches with a slight roll of her hips, a smile and closed eyes.

"I'm sure we can reason with her Teacher, you're over reac-" Achilles stops when he sees Chiron jump off the Gardens.

"Oh Gods…" Achilles mutters in shock before jumping off himself and calling his chariot, pulling his teacher into the standing area, catching him before he hits the ground. As they fly close to the ground, both men pale.

The sound of love surrounds them.

Closed eyes look up at them, some reaching for them.

"It's just like those nightmare visions…No where is safe…" Chiron mutters with vacant eyes.



===



"…I know you have a grudge, but can this be settled after we are safely on solid ground?" Mordred asks as they approach Kazuma and the others.

"No. It is quite possible between Lancelot, Gilgamesh, and this Garden falling that we may not get to solid ground…and he has avoided death for too long."

"You can summon any Servant right? And they wind up far away right?" Kazuma asks, shivering under the smiling blonde's approach.

"Yes, they wind up in Chadela, but not any Servant. Some, like Gods or certain recluses need a proper time to summon." Ritsuka says.

"What about Kings of England?"

"I got like 7 of her."

"Then get an 8th​!"

"I don't want another! Can't you just talk out whatever issue you have with Artoria?" Ritsuka asks.

Kazuma responds by raising a hand towards Ritsuka.

"…You wouldn't…!"

"If I'm going to die because of your waifu addiction, I'm taking your dignity with me!"

"Too late for that." Mash mutters before blocking Artoria's path along with Jeanne.

"Wait…that shield!" Artoria mutters.

"How are you here G-"

A shattering sound stops them all a moment. Behind them Emiya's Marble broke, and shows him face first on the ground, Semiramis also on the ground trying to stop Scathach from stabbing her, and Gilgamesh also knocked out.

Lancelot is holding Shirou by the neck as he is pulling something out of his chest, eliciting a scream.

Ritsuka pales and does a quick summon and is gladdened at seeing multiple gold signatures.

Atalanta vanishes a moment later.

"Big sis?" Jack asks, jus as confused as Cu.

Soon Emiya and Scathach vanish, puzzling and relieving Semiramis.

"Not good…we'll have to make an emergency call for-" Mash is cut off as she too vanishes…as well as Jeanne.

Lancelot finishes pulling out the scabbard from Shirou's chest, leaving the exhausted young man on the ground, unable to move.

"Oh no…Wait, why was it in him of all people!?" Artoria shouts with white cheeks.

"Why was what in him…?" Kazuma asks, already sure he'll hate the answer as Lancelot ties the sheathe to his waist.

"My sheathe…it's magical with healing properties…"

"How much healing are we talking about?" Rin asks.

"…He's effectively immortal now." Artoria says with a warble as Lancelot turns their way.

"Make another summon!" Rin shouts.

"I can't, there's a 5 minute cool down!" Ritsuka says.

"What kind of gacha system has a cool down for summoning?!" Kazuma shouts.



===

Jeanne finds herself in a plain looking room with a very confused looking Mash and Atalanta. Scathach stands with crossed arms and a grimace. Emiya is barely standing.

Jeanne leaves the room and goes into a nearby empty looking room.

"…Don't usually see you summoned Mash. Want to help me with the introduce-" A fat blonde man begins to say.

"We need to get back to Senpai now! They are in the middle of a Singularity!"

"Ok, we'll fire up the system. Do you want to take anyone else other than Scathach along with-"

A scream of sheer fury startles the room into silence. Soon a low maniacal laughter starts.

 

[Sliverhero]

All the madness. Its great

 

[alextheconqueror]

Emiya has done many distasteful things as a Counter Guardian.

He has done many stupid things as well.

Most the result from dealing with the unconsciousness of Humanity, but he has accepted that a long time ago. He may not be happy with much of it, but he has begrudgingly come to terms with it.

"Comrade!" Darnic says cheerfully.

'I refuse to accept this!'

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Honestly, that is a valid crashout

But the chain looping around his neck stops him from killing the Nazi.

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Captain Blazkowicz would be dissapointed by this

"How the Hell did you become a Counter Guardian?!" Aqua shouts, making Darnic stop and look at her, now pulling out a second luger.

"You…!"

'…Honestly, Nazi or not, I can't even blame him for going for revenge…Though how the Hell did he become a Counter Guardian!?' Emiya thinks as the chain tightens.

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Because Alaya sucks?

"Why the Hell did you make him a Counter Guardian?!" Kazuma asks the pulsating rip, ignoring the low moans and questionable sounds coming from it.

"Only one third of that is my- Hng~…fault…maybe half…reasoning is hard for me right now…" Alaya says in a sweet, if weaker voice.

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I'm starting to agree with Fergus, she shouldn't be allowed to make her own choices

"How do you figure that? I doubt Eris said this was a good idea!"

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Exactly!

"That coward- not there~!...like the rest of Heaven and other conceptual beings…have a very l—oooo~…low…standard…for recruiting help…just look at yourself for proof, you slow killer of the Demon King~. Not like I need to mention the other guys Aqua sent over…" Alaya says with a dozen voice breaks.

"Don't insult me! I sent over lots of heroes! But more importantly…can you help me?" Aqua says as Darnic approaches.

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Recruiting Neets is a thing but fucking Nazis?! At least Aqua's actually wanted to help due to the good of their hearths(alongside living their fantasies), even Kazuma has a better morality than Darnic, wait, no, comparing the two of them is insulting to Kazuma, again, because he is a fucking Nazi!!
The fact that he wasn't just rejected by being a Nazi is wrong on so many levels

"How can you say anything about a low standard? And don't call Eris a coward!"

"Maybe I wouldn't if she didn't have two angels holding her up in the air away from Fergus!" Alaya shouts before a fleshy smack sounds out, making her whimper before feebly continuing.

"I'm not going anywhere near him!" Eris shouts from further away.

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Being honest, that's just being a smart person, godess, you got it

"As for the other two reasons…It's hard to think clearly with Fergus here…and the Nazi made some good points…"

"What possible points could he had made?" Rin asks.

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This better be good

"Unlike the last 5 I sent, he can follow orders~."

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That's all? THAT'S ALL!? EMIYA WAS FOLLOWING YOUR ORDERS SINCE THE START YOU-Wait, 5? MHX,EMIYA, Sasaki, Shirou.... Who is the fifth? Kazuma counts? I think he counts

"Him following orders is his worst trait!" Kazuma shouts.

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Part of the course with being a Nazi, I may be repeating myself but he is a fucking Nazi

"Die you blue horror!" Darnic shouts while shooting at a crying Aqua.

"Not sure he even has that now…Is this what humans call lying at the interview?" Alaya says while biting back a moan.

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The fact that you believed him in the first place is what surprises me, he is part of the dogma that mastered propaganda to follow what they wanted the public to believe, they are the masters of making people, their people, that what they are doing is a mandate from heavens

"If anyone is going to kill her it is me!" Shirou the priest says, throwing a black key at Darnic. He readies another blade but stops when Darnic raises his hands in mock surrender.

"…I am more than willing to oblige your attempt on my life. But surely you share my ill will at this blue woman?"

"What are you suggesting?"

"A short truce until we kill her. We both have cause enough for earlier, so why not remove her together? Then we can continue our prior fight without interruption from the divinely dull."

"…I hate you, but you make a good point." Shirou says, prompting Darnic to smile and Aqua to cry before running away. The temporary allies give chase, on their way to kill a God.

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Wait, what? You were chasing him since WW2 and it only needed a blue woman to destroy your church and steal your kill to ally him instead of taking the chance to actually complete your vengeance? Is everyone in this grail war retarded

"Told you, he makes good points…and compared to you and Emiya, he has more of a skill set at the start, being both a skilled mage and disciplined military officer…Oh thank Heaven he's finally slowing down!" Alaya says with a smile.

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...I know what Kazuma is thinking, and I aprove

"Dealing with Vlad and the one Emiya must have tired me out more than I thought…" Fergus says.

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The fact that he says it so calmly

"Create Water." Kazuma says, filling a large water bottle.

"W-what are you…" Alaya whimpers out, a fear making her voice crack further.

"Here you go Fergus. It's full of mana so you should be able to keep going with this."

"WHAT?!"

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Hahahahaha get fucked! Literally

"No no no no I'm already scatter brained on a good day, if you give him that I'll completely-" Alaya groans at seeing the bottle handed to Fergus, who drinks it one long swallow, completely revitalized, and howling with salacious intent as Alaya crumbles from the renewed pacing.

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Mindbreaking the unconcious will of humanity, this should be added to his legend lol

Rin looks on neutrally with red cheeks along with Jeanne.

Darkness is smiling.

Megumin is judging.

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I know what all of them have in their minds huhuhu

Shakespeare takes notes; Avicebron judges Shakespeare and his note taking.

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I'm feeling peak

Servant Kazuma fills another water bottle and tosses it into the rift, eliciting another squeal of blissful sounding horror.

'…Since one of these Kazuma's is a servant, does that mean he could…But how can I be-' Rin thinks while suppressing a grin.

"Since you are a Servant, does that mean you can give yourself water and infinitely replenish your stamina?" Jeanne asks, shocking Rin.

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Not sure if it would work that way, Medea makes sense because she literally breaks the rules but to make something a servant takes their masters energy, it may work to stack some extra energy from before an emergency happens but not on the fly

"Huh…I don't know actually. Probably? I'll have to try that out sometime." Kazuma the Servant says.

'Yes!' Rin and Jeanne think at the same time.

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Ladies, wait for your turn

'…At least you're not calling it a sign…hopefully it works on Sieg too.' Leticia thinks, making Jeanne glance away.

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Pshhh, how do I tell you?

"…Can you give me my damn trench coat back?" Ritsuka asks, still covering herself with her arms.

"But you look amazing!" Medea says.

"Indeed you do Senpai~." Mash says with a grin.

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This is a sight to behold~

'I'll have vengeance for this Mash…'

'We both know you won't stop at dressing me up. Don't use this as a pretense.' Mash thinks back as Kazuma hands the trench coat back while looking to the ceiling and Ritsuka quickly dresses herself, frowning as Medea takes more pictures.

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She is a woman of culture after all

Scathach lobs a rune on the chain, symbols appearing on the chain around Emiya's neck before it grows slack.

"…Figures there is another mongrel with a method of counteracting my chains. I'll just have to deal with you f-"

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It's Scathatch, she can do a lot of things with her runes, including making a Merlin, don't ask questions

"ARRRTHUR!" Lancelot shouts, making Gilgamesh grimace, before relaxing when he sees him attacking Mordred.

Then he startles.

"You mad dog, she is mine!" Gilgamesh shouts as Lancelot sends Mordred into a wall. He looks over at Gilgamesh and slowly raises a hand, beckoning Gilgamesh to come closer. Gilgamesh grits his teeth, before having to deflect a thrown blade and spear at him.

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Ok, I understand wanting an Oyakodon but this is excessive, also would be better with the Lancer or Ruler Artoria just for the different body types

"If anyone is going to kill my son, it will be me!"

"Father!"

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This is touching... Why is this touching!?

"You...have no say…anymore…Arthuuuur!" Lancelot says with a neck crack as he slams his blade towards Artoria, making a crater appear. A quickly summoned beast lunges for Artoria, only to be stabbed and tossed aside from Mordred.

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Huh, they really work well together

'I absolutely hate this bizarre loyalty of hers…' Semiramis thinks before being grabbed by the neck and hefted up by Gilgamesh.

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Get over it is part of the pacjage

"Poisoner, we're you just trying to kill Artoria?"

"She cut off my arm!" Semiramis gargles out, prompting Shirou to look at her arms while Gilgamesh languidly raises a free hand to fire a barrage at Scathach to keep her away.

"It got better…"

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I understood the reference

"I am the bone of my sword…" The other Emiya begins, and Artoria hears this while deflecting another mad slash from Lancelot. She pulls back at the last second of another attack, making Lancelot temporarily off balanced.

"Now!" Artoria shouts and Mordred helps her toss Lancelot towards Gilgamesh.

"Unlimited Blade Works!" Emiya says, encasing the 6 of them of them in his reality marble.

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And here it comes!

"Fool…Even your Reality Marble cannot completely nullify the effects of my Noble Phantasm…! Your fame is effectively gone here!"

"I never had any fame to begin with!" Emiya answers back, making Gilgamesh laugh hard enough to drop Semiramis.

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Yeah, this is just a net positive

"And this isn't the first time I bested a Caster in their domain!"

"I am not a-!"

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Just roll with it!

"…I have doubts your Noble Phantasm can truly turn the tide." Scathach says.

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You would be surprised about what is inside there

"Thankfully we have a new ally…~." Emiya says with a smirk, making Scathach raise an eyebrow as Emiya continues.

"Hey Lancelot!" Emiya shouts, making the deranged knight look his way.

"That squire is carrying your king's sheath." He says pointing at his younger self.

"What?" The younger Emiya asks as Lancelot looks at him before howling.

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Oh, I see where he is going

"Oh no…" Shirou and Gilgamesh say the same time as Lancelot charges them.

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Oh yes

"…Not valorous, but I can appreciate quick thinking. You earned a story."

"How kind of you." Emiya says, getting another chuckle from Scathach.

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This is gonna be great

Cu feels another pit in his stomach, slowing him enough to be grabbed and thrown by Atalanta.

'What is this terrible feeling…?' Cu wonders before shaking his head and resuming the fight.

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The feeling of childhood stories being revealed

Aqua is hiding behind Darkness.

"We need to be care-" Shirou starts but stops when Darnic raises his gun and shoots Darkness.

Shirou looks at Darnic flatly before coughing into his hand.

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Are you even surprised?

"Relax, I have it set to stun. Alaya made these for me so I wouldn't kill innocent people. She might be in pain but she'll li-"

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Oh thank god, she isn't completely brainless

"Oh yes~."

"What?" Darnic asks while looking at Darkness approach, smiling and panting. Darnic and Shirou step back.

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Yeah, she is kinky like that

"Please…empty everything from your gun into me…~"

'Oh Lord, the pervert even scares a Nazi…'

'Oh God…she must be a servant like Spartacus!'

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I mean, both of them are kinda right, though Darkness isn't a servant but she is more similar to Spartacus than you would believe

"You distract her and I'll kill the blue thing." Darnic says.

"No, she's already disturbed me for one life time…you distract her." Shirou says.

"To be so quickly rejected for even violence…so…intoxicating~." Darkness says with a bit of drool.

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Typical Darkness

Shirou and Darnic shake their fists three times.

Both pick paper.

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Hah, classic

Darkness groans before breaking into a run.

They in turn run away.

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The chase will just make it worse

"Maybe we should try restraining her?"

"I'm sure that's what she wants…" Chiron says with a groan as Fiore approaches with a slight roll of her hips, a smile and closed eyes.

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He has a point

"I'm sure we can reason with her Teacher, you're over reac-" Achilles stops when he sees Chiron jump off the Gardens.

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Surprised it took this long

"Oh Gods…" Achilles mutters in shock before jumping off himself and calling his chariot, pulling his teacher into the standing area, catching him before he hits the ground. As they fly close to the ground, both men pale.

The sound of love surrounds them.

Closed eyes look up at them, some reaching for them.

"It's just like those nightmare visions…No where is safe…" Chiron mutters with vacant eyes.

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Just how traumatized is he?

"…I know you have a grudge, but can this be settled after we are safely on solid ground?" Mordred asks as they approach Kazuma and the others.

"No. It is quite possible between Lancelot, Gilgamesh, and this Garden falling that we may not get to solid ground…and he has avoided death for too long."

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Girl, you have bigger problems than Kazuma

"You can summon any Servant right? And they wind up far away right?" Kazuma asks, shivering under the smiling blonde's approach.

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That's not exactly how it works

"Yes, they wind up in Chadela, but not any Servant. Some, like Gods or certain recluses need a proper time to summon." Ritsuka says.

"What about Kings of England?"

"I got like 7 of her."

"Then get an 8th​!"

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*Looks at Lord Logress the ultimate King Arthur* Not sure how much would help at this point, also a lot of people hate her

"I don't want another! Can't you just talk out whatever issue you have with Artoria?" Ritsuka asks.

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Have you tried reasoning with her?

Kazuma responds by raising a hand towards Ritsuka.

"…You wouldn't…!"

"If I'm going to die because of your waifu addiction, I'm taking your dignity with me!"

"Too late for that." Mash mutters before blocking Artoria's path along with Jeanne.

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She lost it at summer, with her sanity at halloween

"Wait…that shield!" Artoria mutters.

"How are you here G-"

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Long story short, have to help save human history by merging with a sickly girl

A shattering sound stops them all a moment. Behind them Emiya's Marble broke, and shows him face first on the ground, Semiramis also on the ground trying to stop Scathach from stabbing her, and Gilgamesh also knocked out.

Lancelot is holding Shirou by the neck as he is pulling something out of his chest, eliciting a scream.

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Well shit

Ritsuka pales and does a quick summon and is gladdened at seeing multiple gold signatures.

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Oh thank god

Atalanta vanishes a moment later.

"Big sis?" Jack asks, jus as confused as Cu.

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What the hell?

Soon Emiya and Scathach vanish, puzzling and relieving Semiramis.

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No seriously, what the hell?

"Not good…we'll have to make an emergency call for-" Mash is cut off as she too vanishes…as well as Jeanne.

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That doesn't even makes sense, Mash isn't even a summonable servant, she is the one responsible to make the summon work

Lancelot finishes pulling out the scabbard from Shirou's chest, leaving the exhausted young man on the ground, unable to move.

"Oh no…Wait, why was it in him of all people!?" Artoria shouts with white cheeks.

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Did she forgot he is Kiritsugu's son?, wait, did she ever learned that?

"Why was what in him…?" Kazuma asks, already sure he'll hate the answer as Lancelot ties the sheathe to his waist.

"My sheathe…it's magical with healing properties…"

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That's an understatement

"How much healing are we talking about?" Rin asks.

"…He's effectively immortal now." Artoria says with a warble as Lancelot turns their way.

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And have the better defense that a servant can get

"Make another summon!" Rin shouts.

"I can't, there's a 5 minute cool down!" Ritsuka says.

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Oh crap basckets

"What kind of gacha system has a cool down for summoning?!" Kazuma shouts.

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A terrible one

Jeanne finds herself in a plain looking room with a very confused looking Mash and Atalanta. Scathach stands with crossed arms and a grimace. Emiya is barely standing.

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Wait, there's now two EMIYA's in chaldea? Archer EMIYA to be clear

Jeanne leaves the room and goes into a nearby empty looking room.

"…Don't usually see you summoned Mash. Want to help me with the introduce-" A fat blonde man begins to say.

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Yay, Gordes the phoenix Musik!

"We need to get back to Senpai now! They are in the middle of a Singularity!"

"Ok, we'll fire up the system. Do you want to take anyone else other than Scathach along with-"

A scream of sheer fury startles the room into silence. Soon a low maniacal laughter starts.

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Well, that is not ominous at all

Wait, if this is during the lostbelts/ordeal calls, then why didn't Gudako summoned any of her Shadow servants? She can do it anytime