"Why do you think you'd be a good waiter?"
"You could say I bring a lot to the table."
"You could say I bring a lot to the table."
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Xicree
Destroy and Rejoice! 124
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Why are snekss so hard to trick? You can't pull their legs.
If a blind girl says you have a big penis, she's just pulling your leg.
This here's a stick up.
*sticks up your butt*
I'm pretty bad at putting up signs.
Oops, wrong place for this post.
Having sex with someone on a keyboard, you gotta make her qwert.
It's no wonder why we have sticky keys.
But if you don't, maybe she's not your type.
Technology has never matched the simplicity of the traditional pen.
In fact, you could say that there is still no e-quill
'Dating is a lot like a blackjack dealer. Hit on anything under 17.'
*lesbianly insert lazy uncreative gay pun*
I wonder if French dogs can drink bone apple tea?
Slang is slang for slang.
"I can't drink this milk. I lack toast and tolerance."
Inspecting mirrors is a job I could really see myself doing.
The Oedipus Complex: Kid Tested, Mother Approved.
Like morning sex? You probably start the day with a bang.
Hear about that new vibrator? It's generating a lot of buzz.
"Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I poop, on company time."
"Yer a unit of power, 'Arry."
"I'm a watt?"
Don't make fun of fat people. They have enough on their plate as it is.
*Hugs* It's going to be alright. The bad fish will be bored soon.
The police came to my house and said my dogs have been reported for chasing people on bicycles. I said "That's impossible! My dogs don't even own bicycles!"
'My parents didn't take me seriously when I can out.
Because I couldn't keep a straight face.'
Google starts selling phones, so Samsung starts taking Notes.
Nose picking is a fetish. You think this is a joke, but it's snot.
Help help I'm drowning in Bad Fish Puns!!!!
'Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.'
Molestation is a touchy subject.
I was gonna tell a gay joke... but fuck it. -
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