Ch. 31 - Role Reversal
9adam4
No emotion, only "peace"
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We went to one of the only 'dry' Mon Calamari restaurants in the district, a place that specialized in cooking their planet's dishes for a non-native palate. Each table was screened-off for the privacy of its diners. Once the large steaming plate was delivered, along with two heavy pitchers of flavored water, the servers left us to finish the meal in peace.
"Not had this before?" I asked Olanna as I grabbed the serrated cutlery, slicing into a flank of some aquatic lizard. It had been steeped in a strong, tangy sauce that I could smell as I plopped a thick slice onto her plate before taking a larger one for myself.
She swallowed her misgivings and gamely picked up the meat by her fingers. "I wasn't aware that humans could eat their food."
"Not the way they usually prepare it, no," I pointed out. "They don't use heat; they pickle it. Way too acidic and tough for human digestion." I bit into the tender flank, and absent-mindedly reached for an eel. "But some enterprising soul figured out boiling it in an alkaline bath. Then you just need to add enough sugar to-"
"Obi." The interruption was firm if not loud. "Enough stalling. Explain, please."
I nodded, taking a minute to try the punch, which was heavy in citrus. "What is the Jedi Order teaching us?"
Olanna perked up immediately; she was always game for when a teacher used the Socratic method to make a point. "How to better commune with the Force, and how to use our gifts to help others throughout the Republic."
"A very orthodox answer," I acknowledged with a smile. "How do you think I might clarify it?"
My apprentice frowned. "How… do I think you would adjust what I said? Something cynical about the crumbling Republic, I would imagine."
I laughed at that. "Right." I took another bite, and Olanna did the same. Despite her initial skeptical looks at the seafood, she was clearly enjoying it. "The Jedi Order teaches its children, initiates, padawan… even its knights… to fit into the large organization it encompasses. An organization that does amazing work, by the way. If I land on a random farming world off the established hyperways and the people there can speak to me in Galactic Standard, chances are that's the Education Corps at work."
"You don't have to sell me on that," Olanna reminded me. "I thought I'd be training to join them by this time next year."
"And you'd have been an excellent teacher, no doubt. You are," I send a wave of approval and saw her positive reaction under my praise. "But the obvious limitation to the Jedi Order's training, is that they are assuming the persistence of the Order. They are training Jedi - and other Force-sensitives that join the Corps - to be one additional cog in their large machine."
She nodded. "We all receive the fundamentals, but then very quickly we specialize. Consulars get different training than Sentinels. Workers for the Diplomatic core don't train the same as Templars."
"And many skills and whole areas of knowledge," I continued this line of thought, "are carefully set aside and reserved for only those deemed to need them. The less savory aspects of our history, for example, or the mental exercises used by the Seers."
"You don't agree with this apportionment?" she chewed thoughtfully the innards of a shellfish.
"If their assumptions are correct, it makes sense." I met her eyes solemnly. "But I had my Visions. A world where the Jedi Order is absent, where a few lone Jedi carry whatever they happen to know, or can learn, to the next generation. Where a Jedi isn't working within a network of his peers and with the resources of the Republic, but surviving entirely on his own, with what resources and allies he can cultivate."
"You were looking to train, not for the way the Galaxy is, but for what it will become," Olanna smiled in comprehension. "But… aren't we working to change that? To preserve the Galaxy, and the Order, from the destruction you saw?"
I shrugged, acknowledging her point. "A lot of my time and training has been spent working on skills and knowledge that I think might be needed for the conflict itself. Methods of fighting that bypass the traditional defenses of Force users, mental skills strong enough to identify and combat manipulation and clouding by the Dark Side."
"Why does that involve the lower levels of Coruscant?" She seemed surprised when looking down at the large dish and realizing there were only a couple of morsels left; I nodded my assent at her and she happily scooped them up.
"I needed an outlet where I could separate my actions from their emotional impact on my Jedi identity. And where I could hone even invasive mental skills without rebuke from the Masters."
Her expression screwed up again. "You're violating peoples' minds."
"Very much so." In response to this omission, I felt a wave of alarm leak out of Olanna past her shielding. "This upsets you?"
In her seat, she seemed to shrink in on herself before saying, "You know what's been happening with Partha. Now I find out my Master's doing the same thing, to those who can't fight back."
I shook my head. "Hardly the same thing. I've been careful to limit my exercises to the same ends where the Jedi Order consider a Force Suggestion to be acceptable. Diffusing violence, misdirecting from my own mission, augmenting a compelling argument, bolstering will over misgivings."
"And yet you felt the need to hide it from your Master. You must have known he wouldn't approve."
I shrugged. "I only recently told Qui-Gon the details of my Visions."
"I'm glad he got you to be less secretive. The Council should have the opportunity to work based on the information you have."
"And the Sith now can, as well," I quipped.
"We're one for one in dealing with Sith Lords," she sipped her punch with a tight-lipped smile.
I shook my head. "The point is that my training is focused on, not what an average Jedi living here in the Republic will face, but what I have reason to believe that I, specifically, will face. I may need to rethink how I go about that training considering where I am now, but I still consider it important."
Olanna nodded. "When we return from Ilum, we can consider how to go about this."
I frowned. "Ilum? Have you given up on attuning Maul's crystal, then? Once you finish your initiate tests, we can -"
"I've spoken with the Council of Seers," she interrupted me, her voice low in volume but firm. "They agree, you need to travel to Ilum and confront your Visions directly."
"You… spoke to the Seers about me, by yourself? As an initiate, not even a Padawan yet?" I scowled at her, surprised.
Finishing her cup, she shrugged assent. "Qui-Gon, Anakin, and I went to speak to them. Although the petition was mine." She met my eyes, and I felt the warmth emanating from her like a blanket. "Master, your newly unlocked memories, the events on Naboo - you've been running at full speed away from them, doing everything other than addressing and making peace with what has happened."
"What is there to make peace with?" I asked, genuinely uncertain at what she meant. "Qui-Gon survived; we won the battle. The Trade Federation is in shambles."
"And so that memory is filed away in you, directly beside the one where Qui-Gon dies at the hands of a Sith Lord. You remember a dozen battles won by Adi Gallia, set next to a world where Darth Maul ends her life and deeds." She held my eyes and mind more firmly, letting me feel her concern for me. "A world where you fall in love with Shmi Skywalker," she pushed through my feeble protest, "is parallel with one where she remains on Tatooine until her violent death. The incongruities are starting to affect you, Obi-wan."
"Your trials," I reminded her. "You need to finish your time as an initiate so you can be officially declared a Padawan."
"Everything is already arranged," she insisted. "My cohort is undertaking its last two tests this coming week, and the week after. I will pass both, and then we will head to Ilum."
Sighing, I gave her an appraising look. "Who is the Master, here, and who is the Apprentice?"
Calmly, and with no trace of humor, she responded. "You told me what you needed me to be, Obi-wan." She rose from the table, ready to go, and I rose with her. "I remind you again: don't set me to a task that you don't want fulfilled. You'll get what you ask for."
"Not had this before?" I asked Olanna as I grabbed the serrated cutlery, slicing into a flank of some aquatic lizard. It had been steeped in a strong, tangy sauce that I could smell as I plopped a thick slice onto her plate before taking a larger one for myself.
She swallowed her misgivings and gamely picked up the meat by her fingers. "I wasn't aware that humans could eat their food."
"Not the way they usually prepare it, no," I pointed out. "They don't use heat; they pickle it. Way too acidic and tough for human digestion." I bit into the tender flank, and absent-mindedly reached for an eel. "But some enterprising soul figured out boiling it in an alkaline bath. Then you just need to add enough sugar to-"
"Obi." The interruption was firm if not loud. "Enough stalling. Explain, please."
I nodded, taking a minute to try the punch, which was heavy in citrus. "What is the Jedi Order teaching us?"
Olanna perked up immediately; she was always game for when a teacher used the Socratic method to make a point. "How to better commune with the Force, and how to use our gifts to help others throughout the Republic."
"A very orthodox answer," I acknowledged with a smile. "How do you think I might clarify it?"
My apprentice frowned. "How… do I think you would adjust what I said? Something cynical about the crumbling Republic, I would imagine."
I laughed at that. "Right." I took another bite, and Olanna did the same. Despite her initial skeptical looks at the seafood, she was clearly enjoying it. "The Jedi Order teaches its children, initiates, padawan… even its knights… to fit into the large organization it encompasses. An organization that does amazing work, by the way. If I land on a random farming world off the established hyperways and the people there can speak to me in Galactic Standard, chances are that's the Education Corps at work."
"You don't have to sell me on that," Olanna reminded me. "I thought I'd be training to join them by this time next year."
"And you'd have been an excellent teacher, no doubt. You are," I send a wave of approval and saw her positive reaction under my praise. "But the obvious limitation to the Jedi Order's training, is that they are assuming the persistence of the Order. They are training Jedi - and other Force-sensitives that join the Corps - to be one additional cog in their large machine."
She nodded. "We all receive the fundamentals, but then very quickly we specialize. Consulars get different training than Sentinels. Workers for the Diplomatic core don't train the same as Templars."
"And many skills and whole areas of knowledge," I continued this line of thought, "are carefully set aside and reserved for only those deemed to need them. The less savory aspects of our history, for example, or the mental exercises used by the Seers."
"You don't agree with this apportionment?" she chewed thoughtfully the innards of a shellfish.
"If their assumptions are correct, it makes sense." I met her eyes solemnly. "But I had my Visions. A world where the Jedi Order is absent, where a few lone Jedi carry whatever they happen to know, or can learn, to the next generation. Where a Jedi isn't working within a network of his peers and with the resources of the Republic, but surviving entirely on his own, with what resources and allies he can cultivate."
"You were looking to train, not for the way the Galaxy is, but for what it will become," Olanna smiled in comprehension. "But… aren't we working to change that? To preserve the Galaxy, and the Order, from the destruction you saw?"
I shrugged, acknowledging her point. "A lot of my time and training has been spent working on skills and knowledge that I think might be needed for the conflict itself. Methods of fighting that bypass the traditional defenses of Force users, mental skills strong enough to identify and combat manipulation and clouding by the Dark Side."
"Why does that involve the lower levels of Coruscant?" She seemed surprised when looking down at the large dish and realizing there were only a couple of morsels left; I nodded my assent at her and she happily scooped them up.
"I needed an outlet where I could separate my actions from their emotional impact on my Jedi identity. And where I could hone even invasive mental skills without rebuke from the Masters."
Her expression screwed up again. "You're violating peoples' minds."
"Very much so." In response to this omission, I felt a wave of alarm leak out of Olanna past her shielding. "This upsets you?"
In her seat, she seemed to shrink in on herself before saying, "You know what's been happening with Partha. Now I find out my Master's doing the same thing, to those who can't fight back."
I shook my head. "Hardly the same thing. I've been careful to limit my exercises to the same ends where the Jedi Order consider a Force Suggestion to be acceptable. Diffusing violence, misdirecting from my own mission, augmenting a compelling argument, bolstering will over misgivings."
"And yet you felt the need to hide it from your Master. You must have known he wouldn't approve."
I shrugged. "I only recently told Qui-Gon the details of my Visions."
"I'm glad he got you to be less secretive. The Council should have the opportunity to work based on the information you have."
"And the Sith now can, as well," I quipped.
"We're one for one in dealing with Sith Lords," she sipped her punch with a tight-lipped smile.
I shook my head. "The point is that my training is focused on, not what an average Jedi living here in the Republic will face, but what I have reason to believe that I, specifically, will face. I may need to rethink how I go about that training considering where I am now, but I still consider it important."
Olanna nodded. "When we return from Ilum, we can consider how to go about this."
I frowned. "Ilum? Have you given up on attuning Maul's crystal, then? Once you finish your initiate tests, we can -"
"I've spoken with the Council of Seers," she interrupted me, her voice low in volume but firm. "They agree, you need to travel to Ilum and confront your Visions directly."
"You… spoke to the Seers about me, by yourself? As an initiate, not even a Padawan yet?" I scowled at her, surprised.
Finishing her cup, she shrugged assent. "Qui-Gon, Anakin, and I went to speak to them. Although the petition was mine." She met my eyes, and I felt the warmth emanating from her like a blanket. "Master, your newly unlocked memories, the events on Naboo - you've been running at full speed away from them, doing everything other than addressing and making peace with what has happened."
"What is there to make peace with?" I asked, genuinely uncertain at what she meant. "Qui-Gon survived; we won the battle. The Trade Federation is in shambles."
"And so that memory is filed away in you, directly beside the one where Qui-Gon dies at the hands of a Sith Lord. You remember a dozen battles won by Adi Gallia, set next to a world where Darth Maul ends her life and deeds." She held my eyes and mind more firmly, letting me feel her concern for me. "A world where you fall in love with Shmi Skywalker," she pushed through my feeble protest, "is parallel with one where she remains on Tatooine until her violent death. The incongruities are starting to affect you, Obi-wan."
"Your trials," I reminded her. "You need to finish your time as an initiate so you can be officially declared a Padawan."
"Everything is already arranged," she insisted. "My cohort is undertaking its last two tests this coming week, and the week after. I will pass both, and then we will head to Ilum."
Sighing, I gave her an appraising look. "Who is the Master, here, and who is the Apprentice?"
Calmly, and with no trace of humor, she responded. "You told me what you needed me to be, Obi-wan." She rose from the table, ready to go, and I rose with her. "I remind you again: don't set me to a task that you don't want fulfilled. You'll get what you ask for."
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