Cosmos Quest (Naruto/Lupin III)

[R.A.G.]

[X] "Ah! Ninja Princess Kurogiku!" you exclaim cheerfully. "It's been a while."

 

[Redon]

X] "Ah! Na-baka!" you exclaim cheerfully. "It's been a while."

 

[FurikoMaru]

[X] Makin' music with my friends

Well that certainly got her to open her eyes all the way.

"How dare you address Nabiki-sama-!" one of the guards roars, but is cut off by Iruka's Big Giant Head jutsu hollering at you for disrespecting a client. Yeeeeee~! That thing gives you the creeps every time he whips it out (As the Actress replied to the Bishop). Even Asuma-sensei inches back a bit.

The younger guard's eyes lighten with sudden comprehension. "... you're that same blonde girl!"

You whistle. "Wow. You got tall, Jiro." And cute, in a scholarly sort of way.

He coughs, and attempts to hide a blush. "It's Tsuruhiko, now."

"When did you meet these guys?" Kiba asks, looking the party up and down. Ami is too busy trying not to look completely mortified to say anything.

"I'm surprised you remember," Nabiki murmurs softly, a small but genuine smile touching her lips.

You grin. "People say that to me all the time."

Hmm. This... isn't quite what you expected. Granted, it's been ten years, but Nabiki's still giving off waves of low-level hostility toward the world in general, or at least the ninja parts of it. Why should seeing you make her less angry? The last time you saw her you were... um... 'outspoken' would be the polite way to put it.

You decide to just go with it for now. You've got a whole week to figure it out.

=

Mom and Dad are incredibly sappy about this being your first 'real' mission; Mom makes your favourite meal for dinner, and Dad actually chokes back manly tears when he leaves for work. Geez. You'd think you were going off to war instead of a wedding.

The basic sitch is this: Nabiki's family wants to unite their taijutsu school with one in Tanzaku Gai by marrying her off to its head, a certain Edajima Hisui. As the heir to the Dim Sum School, she isn't allowed anything more than a ceremonial guard to vouch for her virtue; it's expected that she'll defend herself from any and all threats. However, since she's travelling with her dowry through the woods at the height of the summer bandit-season to get to the Pickpocket Capital of Fire Country, Team Asuma has been hired to make sure that no one makes off with the valuables until the wedding ceremony is complete.

It's a very nicely executed bit of face-saving, in your opinion. Nice to see Na-baka's mind has gotten a little sharper as her tongue's gotten softer. You still think it would have been smarter for her to go totally incognito on the bus, but these old samurai families like to put on a show (and with all the money they have to throw around, can you blame them?), so she's going by carriage, turning what would be a three-hour bus ride into a two-day slog.

You meet the rest of your team at the gates at ten am sharp, as instructed. You've left your red haori at home; no sense showing up the bride, after all. This'll be a green-jacket run.

"Excited?" Asuma asks as the three of you stand waiting for Nabiki's crew to show up.

"What's there to get excited about?" Kiba growls. "We're stuck babysitting some girl's luggage for a week."

"... right." Asuma raises an eyebrow. "Kiba, you are armed, right?"

"Of course I'm armed," he fires back, stung. "Not that I'm gonna need it." he adds sullenly.

Your teacher takes a longer than usual drag, eyeing Kiba speculatively. He lets loose a few smoke rings (bastard bastard bastard). "... interesting theory."

"Oi, sensei! How come Kiba gets special concern?" you whine in mock protest. "You didn't ask if I'm armed."

Asuma just snickers.

"I wish I'd had more time to consult with Takae-sensei," Ami says nervously, patting her painstakingly-coordinated hair and clothes. "What if Nabiki-san makes a reference I don't understand and expects an appropriate reply?"

"Oh, don't worry about that," you say, waving her off. "If she's anything like I remember, she'll probably spend most of the trip pretending we don't exist. Na-baka doesn't think much of shinobi."

"And how are we supposed to change her mind if we behave like hicks?" Ami retorts. "Show a little pride in your position, Ino; hell, you're the Gojuudaime Yamanaka."

Translation: Don't fuck this up for me, Ino; if we want to help Sasuke restore the Uchiha, we're going to need a client base.

The carriage trundles up to the gates shortly thereafter. The older guard sits next to the driver at the front; Jiro - Tsuruhiko, seriously? His family's got a lame sense of humour - stands before the horses, a sword at his side.

[X] Asuma orders you into the carriage; you're the only party member with training in close-quarters fighting and you're the only one dressed in a manner befitting a gently-bred handmaiden, despite Ami's best efforts. If something goes catastrophically wrong, someone will still be able to look after Nabiki until the ransom is sorted out.

[X] Asuma orders Ami into the carriage; you're the only sensor on the team, so you and Kiba need to be outside where you can more easily communicate with your team leader in the event of an attack. Also, you're faster than the other two (Ami much more so than Kiba), so it makes more sense to keep you in the open where you can best make use of that speed.

 

[Guile]

Kiba isn't learning taijutsu? I figured the rifle thing was just a hobby.

(x) Hang with Nabiki. Try to have culture or whatever. Nobility is basically a shell game anyway, if we wanted to we could probably be good at it. And after all, all our work with masks and voices won't mean a thing if we can't pretend mannerisms.

 

[FurikoMaru]

? Kiba's totally learning his family taijutsu. But as a general rule, taijutsu doesn't have many ranged attacks, and while Kiba has a lot of potential as a ninjutsu-spammer, he doesn't have a large store of jutsu yet.

Oh, wait, you mean the close-quarters combat thing? Nah, I meant Ino's the only one who's specifically been taught how to fight in an enclosed space like a train car or a walk-in closet (or a carriage). Remember her mom's tessenjutsu instruction?

 

[Aranfan]

[X] Asuma orders Ami into the carriage; you're the only sensor on the team, so you and Kiba need to be outside where you can more easily communicate with your team leader in the event of an attack. Also, you're faster than the other two (Ami much more so than Kiba), so it makes more sense to keep you in the open where you can best make use of that speed.

 

[Felius]

[X] Asuma orders you into the carriage; you're the only party member with training in close-quarters fighting and you're the only one dressed in a manner befitting a gently-bred handmaiden, despite Ami's best efforts. If something goes catastrophically wrong, someone will still be able to look after Nabiki until the ransom is sorted out.

 

[overmind]

[X] Asuma orders Ami into the carriage; you're the only sensor on the team, so you and Kiba need to be outside where you can more easily communicate with your team leader in the event of an attack. Also, you're faster than the other two (Ami much more so than Kiba), so it makes more sense to keep you in the open where you can best make use of that speed.

 

[nightblade]

[X] Asuma orders you into the carriage; you're the only party member with training in close-quarters fighting and you're the only one dressed in a manner befitting a gently-bred handmaiden, despite Ami's best efforts. If something goes catastrophically wrong, someone will still be able to look after Nabiki until the ransom is sorted out.

 

[Tackyseven]

[X] Asuma orders you into the carriage; you're the only party member with training in close-quarters fighting and you're the only one dressed in a manner befitting a gently-bred handmaiden, despite Ami's best efforts. If something goes catastrophically wrong, someone will still be able to look after Nabiki until the ransom is sorted out.

 

[Hymn of Ragnarok]

[X] Asuma orders you into the carriage; you're the only party member with training in close-quarters fighting and you're the only one dressed in a manner befitting a gently-bred handmaiden, despite Ami's best efforts. If something goes catastrophically wrong, someone will still be able to look after Nabiki until the ransom is sorted out.

Mostly so we can chat with Nabiki. Should be interesting. Maybe net us another contact.

 

[hunter09]

[X] Asuma orders you into the carriage; you're the only party member with training in close-quarters fighting and you're the only one dressed in a manner befitting a gently-bred handmaiden, despite Ami's best efforts. If something goes catastrophically wrong, someone will still be able to look after Nabiki until the ransom is sorted out.

 

[Selias]

[X] Asuma orders you into the carriage; you're the only party member with training in close-quarters fighting and you're the only one dressed in a manner befitting a gently-bred handmaiden, despite Ami's best efforts. If something goes catastrophically wrong, someone will still be able to look after Nabiki until the ransom is sorted out.

Also, what did you mean by: "Jiro - Tsuruhiko, seriously? His family's got a lame sense of humour"

 

[Redon]

[X] Asuma orders you into the carriage; you're the only party member with training in close-quarters fighting and you're the only one dressed in a manner befitting a gently-bred handmaiden, despite Ami's best efforts. If something goes catastrophically wrong, someone will still be able to look after Nabiki until the ransom is sorted out.

 

[FurikoMaru]

Also, what did you mean by: "Jiro - Tsuruhiko, seriously? His family's got a lame sense of humour"

Click to shrink...

Tsuru means crane, and hiko is a common male-name ending. 飛行, read 'hikou', means flight. Jiro's adult name is a lame half-pun.

 

[Malcolmo]

[X] Asuma orders you into the carriage; you're the only party member with training in close-quarters fighting and you're the only one dressed in a manner befitting a gently-bred handmaiden, despite Ami's best efforts. If something goes catastrophically wrong, someone will still be able to look after Nabiki until the ransom is sorted out.

 

[Selias]

Tsuru means crane, and hiko is a common male-name ending. 飛行, read 'hikou', means flight. Jiro's adult name is a lame half-pun.

Click to shrink...

Ah, alright. Thanks.

 

[FurikoMaru]

[X] Strange roads, going nowhere in particular

Ami gives you one last pleading look as you remove your sandals and Tsuruhiko knocks on the carriage door.

"My lady?"

"Yes, Tsuruhiko?"

"Asuma-san has requested that one of his genin accompany the parcels themselves at all times. He has suggested Ino-san. Are you in accord with this suggestion?"

"... send her in."

The carriage's façade, painted a raucously auspicious red and heavy on ornate gold-plated panels stamped with images of the Heavenly Warrior Couple in their animal guises, is mercifully non-indicative of its interior. The small shrine built into an alcove next to the window has a beeswax candle burning before it, not the sandalwood incense you would have expected, and the overall colour scheme has more in common with a breezy seashore than a fortune-teller's shop.

To your astonishment, you realize that aside from your own home, this is the first time you've ever been in a tastefully-appointed living space that still looks like someone actually lives in it.

That's the difference a Capital lady's touch makes, I guess.

"Mornin', Nabiki-chan," you say brightly, setting your sandals next to hers in the small box by the door.

"Good morning," she replies. "I see you still haven't learned how to properly address noblewomen."

You shrug. "If you want someone to call you -sama with a straight face, you should have asked Ami in here."

The carriage's pace is entirely unhurried, and you adjust your estimate of your arrival time accordingly; it might take three days to get to Tan-Ge', at this rate.

"Ami is the other girl, then?" A fan emerges from Nabiki's sleeve and pulls back one of the gauzy white curtains that obscure the view out of the window. "She seems a little overdressed."

"She doesn't want you to think we're a buncha ruffians." You slide into the seat across from her and stretch out as much as you can with a smirk. "I told her that's an impossible dream unless all five of us take a very early retirement."

"... perhaps." Nabiki lets the curtain fall back into place. "Five, you said?"

"Including Kiba's partner Akamaru and Menka here, yep." He mews at her and rubs his cheek against yours.

Nabiki smiles. "Hello, there, Menka," she says, then turns to you. "Is it all right if I pet him?"

Menka, sensing weakness, leaps from your chest to Nabiki's lap. Her laughter is like a chiming bell as she proceeds to give him the babytalking and belly-rubbing of a lifetime. He purrs contentedly.

"Yes, such a handsome fellow," Nabiki remarks warmly, stroking his ears. "I had to leave the my cats behind when we left Hikari-kyo; it's been two weeks since I've been able to pet a kitty."

Despite yourself, your interest is piqued. "Is that so? Why couldn't you bring them with you?"

"Well, they weren't really mine," Nabiki admits. "They belong to the dojo. At least, Haru-san and her children do; Patches and Button just show up when it's dinner time." A flicker of melancholy shoots through her, and is quashed. "My bridegroom is fond of dogs, apparently. Perhaps I should befriend a puppy when I have settled myself."

"It's strange to think of you getting married," you say, before mentally kicking yourself and backtracking. "Not that you're not wife material or anything, just that it's strange to think you're an adult. I know it's been ten years, but in my mind..."

"I understand the feeling," she replies, looking up from Menka for a moment. "I still can't believe you're the same little girl who teased me all those years ago. How old were you then?"

"Three, I think."

"And your parents let you run around on your own?" She sounds horrified.

"I think you can attest to the fact that I was not a normal three-year-old," you say, laughing. "Besides, Konoha is safer than an ordinary city of the same size would be. Until unruly martial arts heiresses invade and start picking on the civilians," you add.

Nabiki has the good grace to blush. "I was not a terribly well-behaved child, in retrospect. I suppose I made myself ridiculous."

"No more so than Shisui did," you say magnanimously.

"Shisui?"

"The wild-haired boy, the one who kept saying that tactless stuff."

"Oh, the lackey." She frowns. "I'd forgotten about him. The quiet boy is the one who sticks in my memory."

A shiver passes down your spine. "Yeah. Mine, too."

"Are they still in Konoha?" she asks.

[X] Lie. Lie and misdirect and turn the conversation to another topic. If you tell her about the Massacre it's just going to freak her out.

[X] Well it's not like the Massacre isn't common knowledge even in the civilian sphere, right? All you have to do is say they were Uchiha and she'll draw the appropriate (read: slightly-less-horrific) conclusions from there.

 

[Happerry]

[X] Well it's not like the Massacre isn't common knowledge even in the civilian sphere, right? All you have to do is say they were Uchiha and she'll draw the appropriate (read: slightly-less-horrific) conclusions from there.

 

[Chibi-Reaper]

[X] '.... Well, you know how they say 'it's always the quiet ones?''
-[X] 'My best guess is that he was less 'lackey' and more.... you know? It only took a few days, I hear, after Shisui killed himself that.... well, you've heard of the Massacre, right? It really looks like Itachi ended up being a whole city of crazy packed down into just one house, with the blinds drawn and the doors locked tight. And Konoha has lots of crazy to go around, though it's mostly the harmless type. I guess I'm not explaining it well? Huge mess, let's say.'

 

[useless101]

[X] Well it's not like the Massacre isn't common knowledge even in the civilian sphere, right? All you have to do is say they were Uchiha and she'll draw the appropriate (read: slightly-less-horrific) conclusions from there.

As hilarious as the 'Yes, you've met a mess murderer, and you thought he was cute' route is, it might not be the most politically savvy move.

 

[Selias]

[X] Well it's not like the Massacre isn't common knowledge even in the civilian sphere, right? All you have to do is say they were Uchiha and she'll draw the appropriate (read: slightly-less-horrific) conclusions from there.

 

[Scia]

[X] Well it's not like the Massacre isn't common knowledge even in the civilian sphere, right? All you have to do is say they were Uchiha and she'll draw the appropriate (read: slightly-less-horrific) conclusions from there.

 

[Aranfan]

[X] Lie. Lie and misdirect and turn the conversation to another topic. If you tell her about the Massacre it's just going to freak her out.

 

[Vindictus]

[X] '.... Well, you know how they say 'it's always the quiet ones?''
-[X] 'My best guess is that he was less 'lackey' and more.... you know? It only took a few days, I hear, after Shisui killed himself that.... well, you've heard of the Massacre, right? It really looks like Itachi ended up being a whole city of crazy packed down into just one house, with the blinds drawn and the doors locked tight. And Konoha has lots of crazy to go around, though it's mostly the harmless type. I guess I'm not explaining it well? Huge mess, let's say.'

 

[Aranfan]

[X] '.... Well, you know how they say 'it's always the quiet ones?''
-[X] 'My best guess is that he was less 'lackey' and more.... you know? It only took a few days, I hear, after Shisui killed himself that.... well, you've heard of the Massacre, right? It really looks like Itachi ended up being a whole city of crazy packed down into just one house, with the blinds drawn and the doors locked tight. And Konoha has lots of crazy to go around, though it's mostly the harmless type. I guess I'm not explaining it well? Huge mess, let's say.'

Click to shrink...

Yes, because saying konoha has lots of crazy to go around will make her want to shop there again.

 

[Vindictus]

Yes, because saying konoha has lots of crazy to go around will make her want to shop there again.

Click to shrink...

Would you prefer "He accidentally his whole family, except not on accident?"

 

[hunter09]

[X] Lie. Lie and misdirect and turn the conversation to another topic. If you tell her about the Massacre it's just going to freak her out.

 

[Guile]

[X] Lie. Lie and misdirect and turn the conversation to another topic. If you tell her about the Massacre it's just going to freak her out.
[X] What would Jiraiya say? Don't feel bad Nabiki-chan. Actually, I think they ended up running off to be together. So I guess they were, you know, like that- Shisui probably didn't want you horning in on his turf, you know? I send the cute one letters, sometimes.

Our revenges are petty.

 

[Torgamous]

Would you prefer "He accidentally his whole family, except not on accident?"

Click to shrink...

The conclusion we look like we're going to be leading her towards is that they were massacred.