Hagrid Quest

it should be interesting to see what we can do to the death eaters when moldyshorts starts his war.

 

We'll be a half giant with military experience.

Bonus points if we're a french citizen, with a french wand and magical education. Because yes, part of service in the FFL is, in fact, giving you a new start at life- To the point that they only started letting you join under your real name as of 2010.

I repeat- Up until 2010, joining the Legion involved taking a fake name for a period of at least one year, and to this day you're allowed to take a fake name and become a nationalized french citizen after 3 years service- Although nowadays there's an extensive background check involved in joining.

... Actually, looking further into the Legion, not sure if this is actually the service that Grandad joined. For one thing, doesn't mention them being involved in 'nam, and I don't recall mention of him taking a fake name at any point. Whatever, my point stands on this being literally the best option Hagrid has.

All he needs to do is learn some french, and he'll be golden.

 

@Vin
...Is that fanon or is it true IRL?

 

Wikipedia-

So yeah, that's a thing.

 

Yes. All my Yes to this. And pretty sure they have charms or potions for learning a language quickly.

 

Hagrid is brought back into the Wizard War and begins striking terror into the hearts of the Death Eaters.
And he's not as much of a big softie as Canon, due to years in the Legion. Or turning his love of creatures that could eat your face into training the most badass cavalry ever.

Excellent.

 

[X] Run away to join the muggles.
-[X]We should go and join the french foreign legion.

 

[JK] Run away to join the muggles unicorns in the Forbidden Forest.
-[JK]We could sew some fake wings into the back of our shirt, glue a horn to our forehead, and become their princess.

 

we should us transfigation (to make the ammo) and cooling enchantments on this
[img width=600 height=450]http://www.everydaynodaysoff.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/Minigun_2.JPG[/img]

 

... Alright I have a very rampant imagination but even I have to go "WTF!" in the face of this.

 

If the QM is cool with it

[X] Run away to join the muggles.
-[X]We should go and join the french foreign legion.

 

Hey, that's how quests work. If I didn't want to go off in crazy directions at a whim, I'd write a fanfic.

I'll just need to do some research...

 

I recall reading a fanfic long ago that had a scene involving Hagrid crashing the Death Eater's party in the Department of Mysteries atop a dragon while wielding a minigun. The rest of the story I can't recall or could be arsed to, but a scene that metal sticks with you.

 

eh, it was likely either a crack fic or crap fic.

 

Like I said, don't give a damn about it. Probably scrolled through it in search of something halfway decent in the infinite sea of shit.

 

[X] Throw yourself on Dumbledore’s mercy. Great man, Dumbledore.
[X] Keep it. It served you well, and deserves better.

 

[X] Run away to join the muggles.
-[X]We should go and join the french foreign legion.

 

Well I appreciate the effort. Take as long as you feel you need to. I'm willing to wait.

 

Wait, wait, wait. This is kind of important if we are going to head to France. What is the year? Cause I kinda remember there was a rather large war going on.

 

1942.

IT'S NAZI KILLING TIME!

Edit: Actually, wait. Why are we joining the french foreign legion then? We can just join up with the British army, become a commando or something!

 

Hagrid was sorted in 1940, and framed for the murder in his third year.
So this would put the trial in '43.

 

If we want soldier we go Britain. If we want freedom fighter we go France. Remember that France is occupied by the Nazi's at the moment.

I like the idea of Freedom Fighter Hagrid, it'll cause him to toughen up slightly.

[X] Run away to join the muggles.
-[X]We should go and join the french foreign legion.

 

1943 is when the Chamber of Secrets is Opening.
June 6th 1944 is when the D-Day Landings happen.

Arguably this could play to our advantage though.

Doing some research, wikipedia says by 1940 80,000 volunteers had joined the French Foreign Legion before France's campaign against Germany.

At this point though, France is occupied but there is a strong Free French Movement, & the 13th Demi-Brigade of the French Foreign legion is actively fighting on the side of the Allies to fight the Axis powers.

I'm sure that if Hagrid asked around some muggles could point him towards a recruiting stand for the French Legion. Given his size & overall excellent health they would love to recruit him. The lack of any French is hardly an issue at this point with so many foreignors serving in their forces.

tBasically the French Foreign Legion not only encourages but outright requires people to come up with a false name when they join. Their entire stick is to let people start over a new page when they join, & make a new start. They've won't bat an eye if Hagrid decides to keep his new French name.

Joining the British army would require us to sign a name which they'll check with records. Hagrid, unfortunately, probably lacks any muggle based documentation. I'm also sure there are some wizards planted in the British Ministry who would notice him trying to join. Given how opaque & enclosed the British Wizarding World is though they wouldn't even care if Hagrid decided to join some foreigner military.

Moreover the fact that Hagrid was willing to fight for France even as the country was under occupation & he clearly is suited for the position will go along way to giving him some respect & reputation in the Post-War Period. The French magical community will probably love the idea of poaching a British wizard who so proved himself in combat, especially after he was exiled from his own community. There is a sort of rivalry still going between France & Britain(far more than now) that likely translates to their magical community & the French Foreign legion is literally designed with people like Hagrid(exiled from his own lands with no local prospects) in mind.

 

French Resistance Hagrid sabotaging Nazi/Walpurgis operations. He could carry a lot of boom.
I LOVE IT.

 

There's also his heritage to consider. Hagrid is discriminated & looked down on by the British wizarding world for his mixed heritage. As a member of the French Foreign Legion he is literally a giant out of legend, a massive figure who will be looked at with awe & wonder by his fellows. Hagrid might literally become infamous in the post war period. Unless the French magical community makes an effort early on to keep him out of the public eye, Hagrid is the intimidating imposing figure the French Foreign legion would love to make a hero out, A troubled foreigner with a dark past who is give a renewed life & purpose in the Legion.

Hagrid is going to be scary in whatever role they give him. Honestly I think he should be assigned to a heavy mortar team or armor support. He'll be able to literally lift a mortar intended for a 3-man team by himself or lift up a tank that goes off its treads.

Given how well armored German tanks are Hagrid might also find himself in an anti-armor role, either moving an anti-tank gun around or using a super-sized anti tank infantry weapon.

 

Hagrid should have a Tank cannon as his weapon.
And I suddenly had a random thought of Hagrid fighting in the RWBY verse similar to the speedier fighters.

 

I'm really hoping that half-giant skin is tough enough to stop bullets. If it isn't, we're going to get killed as soon as we get on the battlefield. Being bigger just gives a bigger target.

 

Well, Hagrid tanked enough stunners to down a dragon at one point. Of course, that's magic, not hot lead.. But then, Hagrid also plays with monsters that could literally rip a human into bloody gibbets, jumps in front of a hippogriff for a student he doesn't even like and doesn't register the follow-up strikes [Which tore Draco's arm up, and would have gutted him if they'd hit solidly], etc....

Yeah, Giants- And half-giants- are some tanky fuckers.

That said, let's try to avoid being shot just in case

 

Wait wait wait.

I just realized. Take Hagrid. Make him comply with a military regulation uniform, regulation clean shave of the face and near-shave of the head.

Give him the big anti-armor guns since he can carry them around.

.... We're turning Hagrid into Heavy Weapons Guy.

 

FRENCH Heavy Weapons Guy. With an English accent.

... Oh lord my sides.