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I Was Destined To Destroy the World But Chose to Sell Llamas Instead. (Original-Shounen Inspired.)

Discussion in 'Creative Writing' started by TripleMRed, Feb 9, 2023.


What should be the best name for best Llama?

  1. Buddy

    30 vote(s)
  2. Patty

    12 vote(s)
  3. Worcestershire Sauce

    96 vote(s)
  4. Stale Melon

    19 vote(s)
  5. Bob

    41 vote(s)
  6. Steve(n)

    21 vote(s)
  7. Admiral Van Perrywinkle

    159 vote(s)
  1. Threadmarks: The Llama Seller, Pt. 1.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
    Likes Received:
    Chaos and Order are two sides to the same coin. The uncontrolled discord of the former are guided by unseen systems of the latter, and the latter's overt systems are shaken off balance by interupptions of the former. The cosmos itself was a machine built on these two foundations, two systems diametrically opposed yet inseperably linked. There were many who argued for an against either side of this dicotomy, but a proper answer to the question of which was the true guiding force over reality was one that would never find a true answer.

    In the grand vastness of the cosmos, one thing was for certain: There was no such thing as 'impossibility'. Only 'Improbability'.

    So one can only imagine the sheer, unbridled panic that had beset the Council of Terra, the greatest and most powerful magic users and Heroes of the backwater world of Terra, when the biggest improbability of their world's history manifested.


    Councilor Nyro paced back and forth just outside of the main council meeting chamber, the rest of his fellow councilors babbling amongst each other in barely contained panic as to the.....thing that had arrived unnanounced and unexpectedly within their meeting room. It had been asleep upon arrival, and after getting over the initial shock, they had quickly and unanimously poured their power into producing a Containment Shield around the creature. The second it had awakened, however, it began to make the most bonechilling of sounds, and they had all rushed outside of the chamber to call in reinforcements to deal with the....unexpected arrival.

    "We must kill the bastard before the rest of its kind finds out its here!" One, a mottled dog-man demanded.

    "Are you mad, fool!? Our magicks have hidden it from their eyes, but killing it will alert them to us and our peace will be gone for sure! Best we wait for the specialist to come in to deal with this." Another, a feline eared and tailed woman of dark, tattooed skin hissed at her colleague for even suggesting such a suicidal propesition.

    "Must we bring the damn Magi into this?" A third, diminutive long eared and green skinned humanoid asked, clearly perturbed by their decision to call in outside help.

    "If we want this taken care of quietly and without any chance of alerting its people-" Nyro stated, even as he continued his pacing to keep his own nerves calm, his hooves clacking on the ground as he walked while his hands wrung one another behind his back. The unicorn male was feeling his age due to his anxiety regarding what had transpired, but he did not become head of the council for the last three centuries by giving into panic, which his pacing was helping him keep in check as he voiced his reasoning to his fellow council members. "Then getting the Magi involved is not only the smart option, it is the only option." Even as he said this, however, Nyro narrowed his eyes. He and his fellow councilors, like most of the other peoples of the cosmos, were attuned to magic, the magic of Mana, the life force of the cosmos. They were naturally able to draw on it to use their powers, their culture having long since found the perfect balance of tapping into it without harmfully draining the world around them of its life.

    But the Magi were no Mana magicians. No, theirs was another power, for they drew strength from the under-foundations of Reality itself. The Void, the Nothing, the Empty, or as it was most commonly known as, the Aether. With Mana, a wizard or sorceress could bend the world around them to their will, to change the spirit of the laws governing the universe to suit their needs. But a Magi, using Aetherworks, had no such limitations, once they had mastered their power and grew in strength over the centuries. Magi did not change the world by shifting its energies and rearanging its elements. They rewrote the world, altered it completely and turned it anew. They did not change the spirit of the laws of the world, they changed the letters of the laws themselves.

    So it was of the greatest irony that such power, such terrifying beings, were wholly on the side of their fellow Mortals, swornd to use their powers to protect them from things beyond Mortal comprehension. They were, in the simplest of terms, completely on the Council's side. This did nothing to put the councilors at ease, however. As always when it came to beings who were different or possessed great power, there were those who held...darker attitudes to their kind.

    "I still can't believe we have to rely on those freaks for this." The youngest of the council, also ironically the physically largest, was a well muscled minotaur who huffed and chafed at the idea.

    "Our feelings on the matter are irrelevant." Nyro stated grimly. "They are our only option, so they are what we will call upon-" Before anything further could be spoken on the topic, the doors to the outer council chamber opened, causing the entire council to become silent save the never ending wailing from within the inner council chambers of the intruder. Stepping through the door way was the Magi they had requested, sooner than they'd expected, and one whom Nyro was especially familiar with. Looming taller than everyone save the Minotaur, shrouded by a cloak that left his armored legs to move freely and with his helmeted head upright and imperious, was Magi Guyial.

    To an outsider, Guyial had a notable similarity to Nyro's own people, the Unicorns: He was a bipedal, even-toed equine man with a horn. The similarities began and ended with the shape, however, for the details spoke of another story. Even with his armor and cloak, Nyro made note of his hooves, or perhaps paws were more accurate, for even armored the detailing of the armor spoke of a fusion between wolf paws and ungulate hooves. His tail, though hidden by his cloak, was like that of a lion instead of a horse, and his head ,while distinctly equine, was with a much shorter snout, the helmet's visor hiding slit-pupiled eyes. What wasn't hidden, however, was his horn which poked out of his helm. Where Nyro's own was like a spiral of glass, Guyial's was straight and sharp-edged like a blade, and made of an opague purplish-red crystaline material. The internal anatomy was more alien and bizarre still, with redundant organs and nervous systems and a skeleton that had proven to be quite unbreakable even by the most powerful of foes.

    Foes like the Elder creature whose skull Guyial kept strapped to his cloak back like a grotesque trophy, with only the council's incredibly age and power keeping their eyes from bleeding at the sight of it.

    "Finally, you're here." The cat woman of the council declared as she moved over to explain to him the situation. "We-" She didn't get to say a further word as Guyial sidestepped her and moved without slowing down in his calm, long stepped strides towards the inner council chamber where the problem lay. Where they others murmured to themselves of Guyial's rudeness or of his trophy, Nyro's focus was in Guyial's posture. He had seen and worked alongside the ancient Magi enough times to recognize his body-language even in full armor. So it was disconcerting to him when he realized that Guyial's body language and movement was not of someone in a hurry or in grim tidying, but of a brisk, calm pace, like he was going for an evening stroll rather than about to deal with the greatest threat in Terra's history.

    Nyro said nothing, however, for whatever the reasoning Guyial had to be so calm, the truth of the matter was that it didn't matter as long as the problem was dealt with. Everyone buy Nyro stepped back as with an unseen willing of his power, Guyial gently opened the doors to the inner sanctum, head still held high as he moved towards it. His pace finally picked up, however, when he heard the cries from within. Not a full run, but now a dedicated power walk forwards. Only Nyro, as head of the council, followed, having a duty to oversee the proceedings that would follow.

    He stayed as far as he could while still having a good view as Guyial stopped before the extremely dense mystical dome surrounding the creature at the center of the meeting chamber table where it had suddenly appeared from nowhere in the middle of a session. Guyial stood there gazing at the energy dome for only a moment, so dense with layers it was fully opague in color, letting out only the sounds from within. In any other context, the energy barrier could withstand the concentrated force of an entire mountain being dropped from orbit down upon it and not even budge. So it was to Nyro's infinite dread and discomfort as he watched Guyial and his elderitch powers of the Aether casually grasp the barrier with a single hand, its spherical surface bending like cloth at his touch, and casually just.....removing it. Every layer, all in a single swift, casual motion, like removing a blanket and tossing it aside, though most blankets didn't fizzle into nothing as they were torn asunder.

    The tiny creature within was now fully visible, and its cries only increased exponentially involume and frequency at the sight of Guyial. Nyro fully expected the ancient being to end the horrid sounds with a fatal motion, or to at least cast some sort of audio dampening field to force silence into the room. Instead, he stared at the crying creature for several seconds, quirking his head the way his kind did whenever they found something strange or interesting. What happened next, Nyro couldn't understand in the slightest.

    With an extension of his power, Guyial placed his Elder skull trophy into dimensional storage, before removing his helmet to reveal his purple furred face and pink slit-pupiled eyes. He placed the helmet upside down to the side of the creature, before grasping his cloak, a remnant of his ancient culture from a world and reality far from Nyro's own.....and unceremoniously tore it from its placement securing it to his armor. He took his cloak and began to gently wrap the creature in it, face gentle as he murmured soothing words in his native, Hellinistic sounding tongue to the creature. This gentle murmuring seemed to have an effect, as the bawling got quieter and quieter until it finally stopped entirely. Smiling a warm, paternal smile down at the creature, Guyial finished wrapping it up and then placing it in his helmet like a bizzarly shaped crib. The tiny creature babbled and reached out a jet black hand, tiny and weak, towards Guyial's face. He just smiled as he lifted up his helmet to bring the creature closer to his face to allow it to honk his nose.

    As Nyro continued to watch in shock, Guyial took a moment to continue to play with the most dangerous thing to ever grace Terra's surface. Without a word of acknowledgement to Nyro, the larger equinoid swiftly turned on his digits to face the door and began to make his way back out.

    As he reentered the outer chambers, the rest of the council were quick to rationalize what they were seeing.

    "Look, he's calmed it so it cannot signal the others-" One said.

    "He's taking it away from here so he can end it and destroy the evidence far from our meeting place-" Spoke another.

    But Nyro knew better. Moving as swiftly as he could to move alongside Guyial and look as though he was escorting their sudden guest out, As soon as they were far enough away to not be heard, Nyro hissed at Guyial.

    "What are you doing?!"

    "I am dealing with the problem." Guyial answered cryptically, his voice deep and smooth.


    "I said, I am dealing with the problem." The edge that was now suddenly in Guyials voice casued Nyro's words to die in his throat. He stopped just at the entry way that led directly outside, watching helplessly as Guyial took the creature and left. There was nothing he could do. Even if he somehow had the power and skill to stop Guyial, the fact of the matter was that Guyial was the only one who could get rid of the little beast without leaving evidence or the death being detected by his people. Powerless and unable to do anything about the situation, Nyro took a breath to try and calm his frayed nerves, and decided to leave it as it was. The Magi had decided how he would handle this, and now Nyro could only wait and pray to whatever dieties would listen that they would not pay for that choice. Oh, how he would pray.


    Mortimore yawned as he got up out of his bed and got ready for the day. He got himself washed, clothed, fed, and ready to begin another day tending to his farm. It was a small thing, hardly able to turn a profit, but it kept Mort and his neighbors fed and that was enough for him. As the dog-man scratched his stuffy snout as he looked over his gardening tools, a knock at the door caught his attention. He wasn't sure how to describe it other than the most polite knocking he'd ever heard, at least in these rural parts where rough-housing and name calling were synonyms for friendliness.

    "Martha, we expecting anyone?" He called to his wife his ears perked up and twitched as the knocking occured once again after a moment of silence.

    "No Morty, but maybe it's one of the neighbors looking to give back somethin' they borrowed!" Mortimore scoffed to himself. Like hell anyone around these parts would give back a tool except as an afterthought, but who knew. Maybe it was one of his neighbors come to give him back something of his they borrowed.

    The knocking came a third time.

    "Hold your Chicabows, Jackie, I'm comin'." Mortimore called out as he reached the door and opened it.....and found himself staring at nothing but the cobble stone road outside. Blinking, Mortimore looked to his left and right, wondering to himself if this was one of his friends playing a prank on him when a polite cough came from below. Looking dowards, the 6'5 Mortimore realized he was looking at the strangest sight he'd ever did see: There, reaching up to just past his waist, with a round, well knit purple-black cloak covering its body and a large, styalized swept-back purple-black wizard hat on its head, was a diminutive creature with black furless skin, a short puppy-dog snout, emerald green eyes with slitted pupils, and ears long enough to give a Goblin a run for their money.

    "Hello, my good sir!" The critter stated in a scratchy, distinctly male voice. Mortimore said nothing for a brief moment as he took in and processed the sight, before he called over his shoulder.

    "Martha, there's some kinda....some kinda....some sorta deformed child here." The critter narrowed his eyes at the words Mortimore spoke.

    "That's nice dear!" His wife called from her sewing room upstairs.

    "Pardon me, sir, but KE-er, I am not a child." The little guy stated bluntly.

    "....Are....Are you sure you're not a kid?" Mortimore pressed, still unsure of what he was looking at. For a moment, the little critter's eyes went wide with anger.

    "KEVIN IS NO CHILD-BABY!" He declared in his scartchy voice, loud and indignant, politeness giving way to anger over the rudness being displayed towards him.

    "You sure?"

    "Yes! I used to be much smaller, but after surviving puberty disease, I am now my titanic form!" Mortimore quickly double checked and found this 'Kevin's 'titanic form' was still just a little bit over Mortimore's waistline in height, not counting the hat.

    "...Well, uh, alrighty then." Mortimore stated after another moment to process this. "Well then, uh, Kevin, what can I do for ya?" Seemingly calmed down by the question, Kevin smiled a wide, friendly smile, exposing is pearly white dentures. If Mortimore didn't know any better, he'd go so far as to say they were sparkling from how clean they were.

    "Well, my good sir-" Kevin began, returning his speech to a more dignified manner like he'd begun with, "My name is Kevin, as I said, and I am a traveling Llama salesman!" Mortimore blinked and now he was certain this was some kind of joke. He looked around and confirmed that there were, in fact, no Llamas around.

    "....Are you pulling my leg?" Mortimore asked.

    "I can assure you sir, that I am not tugging at your organic momentum apparatice."

    "I-wah? No, boy, I mean I don't see no Llamas." At that, Kevin made an 'ah' of understanding, before a smile returned to his face.

    "Allow me to bring one in from my transdimensional llama plane."

    ".....I beg your pard-" Before Mortimore could say anything further, Kevin closed his eyes and began to float, his body covering cloak beging to rufle and flow around him, revealing legs covered up by bandages, his feat stubby and paw like. Mortimore's eyes widened as he realized that this was no ordinary individual, hideous goblin creature or otherwise, but a wizard. A powerful wizard, going by the fact that the clear skies overhead suddenly developed into a dark, angry stormfront, the eye of a hurricane forming directly above them. Or rather, above Kevin. "What in the world!?" Kevin's eyes opened, and in place of the emeralrd green there was now glowing rays of golden light. Mortimore's knees began to shake and he fell on his rear end as Kevin opened his mouth and what could only be described as the wordless hymn of angels graced his ears. Tears formed in his eyes, his mind barely comprehending what was happening. A golden orb of energy formed beside Kevin, growing in size and intensity enough to cause Moritmore to have to shield them from the overwhelming light. It was as though the divines themselves were about to either reward him or strike him down.

    And just as suddenly as it began, it ended, not with a bang or any sort of loud sound, but with a surprisngly underwhelming cough like puffing sound. Blinking his eyes and removing his hand from his sight.....And just as Kevin had said, standing there before him was a Llama. It wasn't strange as far as Llamas on their world went, with its purple wool and orange polka-dots, but it was definitly a well groomed and taken care of animal, almost noble even as it near-mindlessly chewed its cud. Mortimore blinked again, his racing heart returning to it's normal rate as he got himself up onto his two feet. He leaned his head out to look outside and saw the sky was now as clear as it had been a moment before, Kevin was now back on his own two feet, clothes in place, and the only shred of evidence that any form of magic had been used was the pressence of the Llama, chewing its cud like it hadn't just been summoned from a, quote, 'transdimensional llama plane'.

    "As you can see, sir, this fine specimen is in the finest of health, well taken care of and fed only the finest of feed to ensure a glossy, full coat." Kevin declared with a smile. "Now, as with any other animal, Llamas require a lot of love and attention, but if you take care of your llama, your Llama will take care of you. They are very intellgient creatures whose wool can be shorn and used to produce clothes or other items, their milk is nutricious and good for you, and properly trained like this one already is, they can make for excellent guard animals to help protect your crops and farm from-"

    "I'll take it." Mortimore interupted Kevin's clearly hard prepared speech, eyes frozen in a look of shock as his brain finally caught up with him and he finished processing the madness that had just occurred. Kevin blinked in surprise, clearly having expected to have to finish his spiel before making a sale, but a smile broke through his face all the same.

    "Excellent sir! Could I also offer you a special deal for several more at a discount with our 'Herd Package'?"

    "Yes yes." Mortimore's response was almost as robotic as his stiff nod. Kevin didn't seem to notice this as he smiled even wider.

    "Excellent! I'll summon them up right away, and we can finish our deal with a contract and payment of 200 bronze pieces and I'll even throw in a helpful owners guide to taking care of them for free!" Mortimore snapped out of his stupor to stare at Kevin with shock. 200 bronze pieces for a small herd of already trained llama summoned from some mystical transdimensional plane?

    "Is everything alright sir?" Kevin asked, now concerned by Mortimore's facial expression. "Is 200 bronze too much?" Too much? Too much? 200 bronze was chump change for what was being sold to him! "I'm willing to work with 150-"

    "Stop." Mortimore stated. "Wait here." With that, Mortimore head back into his home, much to Kevin's confusion, and emerged with a bag of payment. Handing it to Kevin, the diminutive canine(?) creature smiled as he took it, but frowned.

    "Sir, this is 100 silver pieces, this is too much-"

    "It's the right price." Mortimore declared, summoning his authoritative prescence he used to get the kids in line whenever they got too rembunctious. "Trust me." Blinking, Kevin just gave a genuine, grateful smile in return.

    "Why, thank you sir! Let me just get the rest of your Llamas and the contract and we'll be done here!"


    Kevin waved goodbye to the nice fellow he just finished selling a small herd of 5 Llamas to, as well as the Llamas themselves whom he'd been rearing in his plane he kept them stored within. The nice dog-man, whose name Kevin found out was Mortimore, gave a wave back as Kevin left, beginning his journey down the road. The first sale this week, and he'd even gotten a massive tip from it! Oh, this was perfect! But he had to act proffesional, so Kevin forced himself to remain calm and ungiddy as he made his way down the road towards the next potential customer some miles away. Once he was out of view, however, Kevin found himself giggling to himself, jumping with joy and clapping his stubby foot-paw thingies together. He made his first sale in the region! Oh, what joy! Pappou would be proud, but he'd be prouder still if Kevin continued his journey to sell Llamas and improve people's lives. So that was what he would do.

    Floating back down to the ground after remembering it was rude to ignore gravity, even if you were really really happy, Kevin began his journey to his next customer. After the first five minutes in silence, however, Kevin frowned in discomfort. The silence was.....uncomfortable. Deciding to become comfortable the only way he knew how, Kevin used his power to summon forth a music playing artifact Pappou had found and gifted to him specifically for situations like this. Placing the 'head phones' over his ears and taking the device out of his pocket, Kevin found a song that matched his current mood and hit the activation button. As the first notes hit his ears, he found himself smiling giddily as he bopped his head and began to skip in time with the tune, noticing too late that he was being rude to gravity again and floating further upwards with each step, something he rectified with a giggle to himself.

    Yup, today was a good day!


    TripleMRed Presents:

    I Was Destined to End the World, But Became a Traveling Llama Salesman Because Screw Destiny, I Do What I Want-The Musical. (An Action Comedy Story and Love Letter to over the top action, music, and magic duels.)


    Kevin as Himself.

    Pappou as a Greek Word.

    The Llamas as the Endless Horde.

    And many, many more.

    [ Hello Everyone! My name is TripleMRed, and this original story is something of a love letter to action comedy, music, classic shonen, and modern day storytelling. I hope you will all enjoy it as I tell Kevin's tale, and like Kevin himself as much as I have come to from designing and planning him. I would also like thank a good friend of mine, The Derp Prime, for pushing me to finally do this story. I did it for you, my friend. > ]​
  2. ThedudeManBro

    ThedudeManBro The Dudeliest Man on the block, Bro!

    Nov 19, 2018
    Likes Received:
    I've known Kevin for only 17 minutes but if anything would happen to him I'd kill every single one of you and then myself.
  3. Threadmarks: The Llama Seller, Pt. 2.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
    Likes Received:
    Gamil stared at the tiny bundle before him. The tiny creature in the tiny bundle stared back at him. The dark armored Oberon male narrowed his eyes. The tiny creature blinked. Gamil's eyes narrowed further. The tiny creature stuck out its tongue in a blep, blissfully unaware of the intensity of the stare it was recieving.

    "Uncle," Gamil slowly began, eyes still locked on the creature before him. "Is it wise to have to have involved us in...." The younger of the two Oberon lifted a hand and motioned it in the creatures general direction. "THIS whole situation?"

    For his part, his uncle Guyial hummed to himself as he looked through the cubbards of the home he shared with his nephew on the world of Terra.

    "Believe me, nephew, it is the only wise thing to come out of this whole scenario. And that-" he motioned towards the bundle off handidly, "Whole situation is the newest member of the family." Gamil tore his eyes off the tiny creature to give his uncle an incredulous look, arms folding as his armor jostled with the movement. It was neither as old or as mystically well forged as his uncle's own set, being made here on Terra, but it had served him well in his five centuries as a Magi under his uncle's tutallege. Most would find it humorous that he decided to wear his full set of armor in response to being in the same room as the infant, but those who did had no idea of just what was involved here.

    "You can't be serious." Gamil stated bluntly, unbelieving of his uncle's words.

    "I haven't been this serious since I had to pull you out of that nasty incident on Mephusa." Despite his words, Guyial had the biggest piss-drinking grin on his face as he remembered the incident in question.

    "We agreed never to talk about that." Gamil hissed, his mask hiding the deep purple blush bleeding through his short fur beneath his helmet.

    "The fact I just mentioned it should tell you how serious I am about this then." Guyial chuckled. "Now, stop being so paranoid and remove your helmet. The little guy loves honking people's noses."

    "Uncle, it's one of them."

    "He is a baby." Scoffed Guyial. "Now stop stalling, be a stallion and let the tiny one honk your nose." Gamil felt the urge to keep resisting his uncle's commands, but ultimately relented. 500 years was long enough to come to realize when he was in a losing battle against his uncle. Removing his helmet to reveal a younger, unmatteed short-muzzled face of a male Oberon, Gamil grit his teeth lifted the bundle in the make shift basket and brought it to his face. Without missing a beat, the tiny baby reached out with a little hand to honk Gamil's nose. Gamil snorted in response, the hot air causing the infant to squeel and giggle with delight.

    "He likes you! I think it's his way of bonding with people."

    "I still don't like it." Gamil uttered as he gentle but firmly held the tiny infant at arm's length from his face now the honking was done, the little baby reaching out while giggling to continue to boop his snoot.

    "Don't worry." Guyial chuckled. "He'll grow on you. After all, you managed to grow on me!" Gamil sputtered in response, looking at his uncle with shock even as the baby's giggling increased in response to the funny purple horsy's funny faces and noises.

    "You said I was your favorite nephew!"

    "You are my only nephew." Guyial's piss-drinking grin only increased in size as he continued to needle his nephew, which only caused his nephew's sputtering to begin anew and the babies laughter to increase further still. Oh yes, Guyial was certain of it: This was the wisest thing to come out of this whole scenario.


    As the sun crested over the hills and its gentle morning light peeked through the window of the small but comfortable cottage in the plains, Kevin's eyes snapped open as soon as they felt the warm rays of first light hit his face. With a yawn, a stretch, and a moment to soak in the morning light, Kevin got out of bed to begin the day. Well, okay, first he forced his floating self to lay down in his bed first, then repeated his actions like a normal person would do, then he got up to begin his day. Getting in front of his mirror, Kevin smiled as he did his morning stretches and used his magic to cleanse his still clothed body, willing himself nice and clean.

    The still-suit he used, a gift from Pappou, resembled an outfit made of interlocking bandage wrappings that covered him from foot-paw toe thingies all the way to his neck. It was useful in helping keep himself clean without having to take the time to take baths or stop to take a pee break, on top of recycling his sweat and urine into potable water. He'd asked Pappou where he'd gotten it, to which Pappou said it was traditional attire from his native lands. Extremely, extremely ancient, outdated attire, but still traditional. And it had been custom made just for Kevin! Between his magics and the suits incredible abilities, Kevin never had to take it off to stay clean ever again!

    Granted, that probably wasn't what Pappou had intended to happen, but it wasn't like he or Cousin tried to stop Kevin from this life style either, so there was that.

    Regardless of the hows and whys, the still-suit was integral to Kevin's lifestyle as it helped him skip over time used for such every day cleansing to focus on the stuff that really mattered. Putting on his cloak and hat, also gifts from Pappou, he headed out and began his daily routine.

    6:05: Kevin hummed to himself as he did a head count of the source of his life's purpose. The herds upon heards of Llamas that made up his trade went about their buisness eating grass, chewing their cud, or eating grass to turn it into cud to chew, each colored in a dazzling array of color patterns only the Llamas of Terra could come in. He also made sure to check his small, but growing herd of Alpacas, eager for the day when he passed the test to earn his Alpaca Seller's Liscence and begin to include them in his sales to valued customers the world over!

    7:20: After completing his head count and survey of his beloved cameloids, Kevin sat down on the tallest tree on the tallest hill in his Transdimensional Llama Plane and ate his breakfast of champions: PB&J sammiches with a tall tankered of Llama milk. Feeling sated by the healthiest of healthy meals (no matter what Cousin said on the matter!), Kevin stretched himself out in the warm rays of the sun of his realm before moving on to the next task in his daily routine.

    7:40: Moving quickly through his orchards of grapes and peanuts, Kevin collected basketfulls worth of both before taking them to his presses.

    8:00: Starting with the grapes, Kevin placed the baskets into a large, tub like pressing station, read to be stomped into the finest of fresh jams. Humming to himself, Kevin summoned forth his special Big Stompy Jam Boots(TM), his dainty paw like feet being unsuited for the task. Cleaning them to make sure the next batch of jam that day was the freshest of fresh, Kevin placed his boots on (Read, he attached them to the stilts he used to use them for stomping) and began the laborous but fulfilling process of stomping his grapes into jam.

    8:05: Kevin frowned. His humming wasn't enough to stop the silence around him from being disconcerting. He didn't like the silence. It made him uncomfortable. So, taking out his head phones and music player, he pressed the play button and, as he'd been taught, willed it to play some music that would energize him. As the beats of the music started to play, Kevin found himself smiling as his discomfort was washed away and the happy, peppy beats envigorated him in a way that could not be described and understood without feeling it for oneself. His stomping became more focused and orderly, the pace quick but manageable for him. In record time, the jam was made and ready for use, but first he had to pour it for storage and begin work on the peanut butter!

    8:30: The gathered peanuts were meticulously inspected, cleaned, and shelled by Kevin by hand, his speed enhanced by his power to perform the process quickly but not instantly. Once shelled and sorted back into clean baskets, the freed nuts were then taken to his special cooker furnace, made to the specifications Cousin had instructed him to create it to, and began the process of heating and cooling them. This was the longest process due to Kevin's devout insistance to use as minimal magic in the production of his staple foods. After heating and cooling, he pressed the nuts through another of Cousin's inventions, the Blanching Machine, making careful note to harvest the seperated skins and heart for later usage, while the rest of the peanuts found their way into a grinder Kevin manually handled the functioning of. Some would have found the massive hamster-wheel design embaracing, but Kevin found it excellent excercise! Finally, at the end of the long process and after adding generous amounts of sugar to the product, mixing thoroughly, the peanut butter was collected, inspected, and then jarred for use in his PB&J sammiches for the next few weeks!

    10:00: Once completed and packed away in jars, Kevin set aside his jam and peanut butter for later use in his Dimensional Storage Shack(TM), before he began the process of collecting the source of his incredibly durability, Llama milk. Taking care to pick and choose the Llama hembras who had weaned off their tiny Llama babies, but who were still producing milk, Kevin got to work milking gallons worth of milk from scores of them, by hand, his experience allowing him to perform the difficult task at a rapid pace. Once completed, the collected gallons were taken to his Dimensional Storage Shack, But Colder(TM), where they would be preserved for use in drinking later. All except two buckets, which he set aside to continue his quest to produce grape and peanut butter flavored yogurt dishes!

    11:00: With all his responsbilities in the morning finished, and with an hour before he began his daily routine on Terra proper, Kevin began to go through the motions of the training Pappou has taught him. Sitting cross legged, he closed his eyes and allowed his power to flow from him. All around him, constructs of dirt and grass were shaped, and then transmogrified into various targets and practice dummies of materials ranging from wood, to steel, to a mix of both to simulate targets with weak points. With the construction done and the targets hardened beyond their base material durability with as much of his power he was able to shield them with, some even gaining overt mystical barriers at random intervals, Kevin opened his eyes at the targets before him. Most were in odd, inhuman shapes of tentacled horrors, the kind he'd been taught to defeat, but also among the targets were more conventional anthropoidal designs, with simulated weapons in their hands. With a breath, Kevin launched himself forward. Attacking targets that didn't attack back was a limitation to his training regimen he had yet to overcome, but he had no intention of getting into fights if he could avoid them. Indeed, he wouldn't even be practicing if he hadn't been taught better by Pappou. Besides, if he didn't train, how could he be prepared to step in to help people being accosted by things they couldn't fight back against themselves?

    11:50: Kevin looked over the various targets, satisfied with the results: With careful precision, every target had been 'nonlethally' subdued with painful, but perfectly recoverable injuries to their various forms....All except two. One Squiggly and one Normal target, both of whom had the regions related to the heart torn open. Kevin frowned, feeling a little bit of distress at the sight of those two, but practice demanded being ready for any situation, even ones he wanted to avoid at all costs. The kind where the other party didn't get back up ever again.....He pushed aside his discomfort as he looked at the time. It was time to get clean and begin the workday!

    12:00: Cleansed and after enjoying lunch, which consisted of the last of his last batch of PB&J sandwhiches and Llama milk, Kevin began his daily journey across the country side of the Red Haven region of Terra. Named after the red colored foliage of the trees, Kevin hummed to the song he'd had on loop for the last few hours to keep his happy mood up as he searched for the first abode of the day. Given his inssistance of keeping a light, bouncy pace of skipping down the road, it would be hours before he made he found his first potential customers of the day.


    "Hello sir!"

    "Hello, hideous Goblin."

    "I am no Goblin, sir, I am Kevin, Llama Seller!"

    "I don't see any Llamas."

    "Whoops, I keep forgetting that part. Here, let me just-"


    "Hello, ma'am!"

    "What do you want, you ugly dog midget?"

    "I'm Kevin, and I'm here to sell you on the wonderful advantage of your very own Llamas!"

    "That's an Alpaca."

    "Wha-Jerry, what are you doing here? I can't sell you, I don't have an official Alpaca Seller's Liscense! My apologies ma'am, here, allow me to just-"


    "Hello, sir-"

    "Why do you look like a dog that got a bad snoot job!?

    "You see sir-"

    "What's that, sonny?! You're going to have to speak up, my hearing's not so good after The War!"

    "Hello sir!-"


    "HELLO SIR-"







    Kevin sighed. Today had been rough. Sure, he'd managed to sell some product, but people were so much ruder around these parts than at home. Still, he couldn't give in to despair! Despair led to apathy, and apathy was death, after all! Putting on his best smile, he knocked on the door of the latest house, Llama preemptively ready after realizing he was wasting time not having at least one prepared for display or selling purposes, he waited politely as a faint 'just a minute' came from within. Indeed, about a minute later, the door opened to reveal a weathered, slightly hunched and bespectacled rat woman squinting at him as she opened the door. She adjusted her glasses to get a better look at him before smiling a fond smile.

    "Why hello there, aren't you just adorable, deary!" Kevin's smile matched her own. A granny! How wonderful, he had yet to meet a mean or rude granny, and this one was no different!

    "Hello, ma'am," He stated as he motioned towards the cud chewing cameloid next to him. "Could I interest you in a Llama?"


    10:00: After a long, long day of walking and mostly rude customers, Kevin found a good spot to stop for the night to mark where he would return to Terra the next day, before returning to his Transdimensional Llama Plane(TM). Passing through the two other transdimensional layers, empty planes designed as buffer zones to the Llama Plane (just like Pappou had taught him to do back when he first constructed his plane), Kevin was quick to perform another head count for the night, chastizing Jerry the Alpaca for not being a Llama, before hugging him because he felt it was too mean to call him out for something he couldn't help being, Kevin ate dinner (PB&J Sammiches and Milk) from his new batch, before getting ready for bed.

    As Kevin got into bed, he found himself staring up at the ceiling and silenty wondered to himself if tomorrow would be any better. There was a town further down the road, the first one in the region Kevin would be going into, and he was wondering to himself how he should handle his Llama selling there? Perhaps door to door? No, too impractical: Not everyone in a town had space or need for a Llama when you could just strategically sell some to the local farmers or the town leadership to maximize profits, people helped, and coverage of Llamas in as few deals as possible. After another moment of consideration, Kevin nodded. Yes, that would be the plan. Farms first, then see the town leadership for maximum Llama selling potential!

    He giggled to himself excitedly as he imagined how many people he could help with tomorrows up coming sale. Regardless of whatever else happened, he knew he would be making his Pappou proud! He could feel it in his bones, his dense, calcium rich bones! With his excitement palpable, Kevin closed his eyes and allowed dreams to take him, take him to dreams of Llamas sold, people helped, and proud Pappous.

    Tomorrow would be a good day!
  4. Threadmarks: The Llama Seller, Pt. 3.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
    Likes Received:
    Today was a terrible day.

    Alyxia sighed as she trudged her way down the road back to Cotcher's Town, the bardess the very image of defeat. Her clothes were torn, she was covered in mud, her guild's signature guitar that was her seal of office was damaged and missing several strings, her hat was eaten by a Traveling Hungerweed (again!) and worst of all, she had been kicked out of her last adventuring party because they didn't, quote, 'want to play babysitters to a newbie'. Which, okay, that was fair, but they didn't have to literally kick her out of the group! Her poor butt was still smarting from that....

    With another sigh, the dog woman adjusted her spectacles, which had miraculously somehow survived her latest ordeal unscathed. She didn't know how, but she sent her prayer of thanks to whatever dieties would listen for that small but welcome gift.

    With her latest job a dismal failure, but still firmly alive, Alyxia still couldn't help but smile as she crested the hill to catch sight of her destination. Cotcher's Town. Named after its founder centuries earlier, Cotcher's Town was the smallest but also quietest little trading town in the Red Haven region. At a formerly major crossroads, the town had been the center of commerce for decades which led to its early initial growth and power, but this quickly died almost as fast when other trade towns sprouted up in other, more strategically viable trade routes that had grown as roads spread further still. While not economically dead thanks to still having some hustle and bustle for minor trade goods in the local area, Cotcher's Town's ultimate fate was to never reach its full potential and to instead remain in a respectible but ultimately unimportant position on the map.

    Many had bemoaned this in the earliest days and had gone away in search of the wealth they had felt they had been denied, but many more came to fill their place, being drawn to the relatively safe, comfortably uneventful nature of the town. Farmers, minor trader organizations looking to not be muscled out of buisness by bigger ones, and those who simply wanted away from the front lines of the Adventurers and Heroes fighting to save the world from whatever ghastly horror crawled out of the woodworks elsewhere in the world.

    As a native herself, Alyxia always felt happy to return no matter how poorly her latest attempt to join an adventuring party went. As the road she was on began to cross the fields of farmland pocketing the town's outskirts. she felt herself feeling better and better, to the point where she decided to just take a seat on the side of the road and just drink in the sight of her home town for a moment. Sure, this day started terribly, but maybe it wouldn't be so bad after all!


    Today was the absolute worst day in Cotcher's Town's history.

    As Mayor Lucian stared at the Astrologist babbling barely coherently as she motioned towards a mystic projection showcasing the local cosmos around Terra, he fought hard not to despair at what he was hearing: Sali's Hope, the biggest comet to pass by Terra every hundred years or so, was now on a direct collission course for Terra. A direct collision course for Cotcher's Town, to be precise. While he didn't have much of a head for cosmological phenomena, Lucian did have a head for math, and the math looked horrifying. With the mass and speed of Sali's Hope, the comet would hit Cotcher's Town with sufficient force as to not only utterly destroy it, but to also completely flatten everything in a 200 mile radius. Worse, with the current time scale presented, even if they started an evacuation right that instant, nobody but maybe the local Rookie Adventurer's and Heroes would be able to escape the blast radius in time.

    The grim news only got grimmer as the Astrologist said something of not trying to evacuate the town as, quote, 'it would be a mercy for us all to be instantly annhilated by the impact compared to the suffering those outside of the direct blast zone will suffer from'. Lucian grit his teeth at those words. His people, who had trusted him enough to vote him into office, the same people who he had spent his whole life around from boyhood to adulthood, would die. There had been a hope, however small, that a Beginner Level Hero could, possibly, avert the disaster through feats of godly strength or mystic power. At that level of power and ability, they were more than able to do just that and save the town.....but unfortunately, this hope was dashed by a complete lack of any such Heroes of power in the town's area.

    Oh, this wasn't to say none such heroes passed by Cotcher's Town. As small as it was, it was still a trade hub in a formerly major crossroads, so there was always a passerby or two of that level of power stopping by for a pit stop. But the last Beginniner level Hero had passed by weeks ago, and they wouldn't be lucky enough to get even a Beginner in time to save the town.

    Simply put, Cotcher's Town was doomed, and the best they could hope for was a swift, mostly painless instant obliteration.

    It would take a miracle to save them now.


    Today was a boring day.

    Toyo sighed as he laid down in the grass on one of the hills leading into town. The male Goblin glanced over at the torn up, muddy, bespectacled dog woman who had sat down to stare at the town below, while he himself relaxed by staring up at the sky. The clouds that blocked the view of the sky over the town proper weren't visible here on Cotcher's Hill 2 (The Second One), giving him a perfect view of the otherwise clear sky above. The sun was blocked by his hat, allowing him to stare upwards without fear of its gaze hurting his vision. It also gave him a perfect view of the brillianlty shining star that was still visible even in the day! The Goblin trader didn't know what it was, but if he had a pictocaptura like the city folks had, he'd definitly capture the sight of it for posterity. Also, to copy and sell for money, but who wouldn't want a copy of this sight hanging on their wall?

    A second uninvited guest came into his space, and as Toyo glanced at them, he wasn't quite sure what he was looking at. At first, he thought he was looking at a black skinned, magic using member of his kind going by the wizard like garbs, but his facia lfeatures were all wrong. Like a cute, short snouted puppy dog, rather than the cat nose of his species. The pair of tiny, pearly white fangs poking out of his muzzle, was also something of a feminine trait among Goblins, but given the dog snout and uncharacteristically colored skin, he wasn't sure if this was a member of the fairer sex of his kind or not.

    He almost didn't register the tan and pink Llama following the odd figure, silently chewing its cud and loyally standing beside its master. What he did register, however, was that the new guy was staring at the twinkling star in the sky too, face scrunched in deep contemplation. Suddenly, the new guest looked directly at Toyo with a friendly smile.

    "Excuse me sir, could you look after my Llama for me for a moment?" The voice was scartchy, but distinctly male, so that answered one question. Toyo wasn't usually one to take requests from utter strangers, but he was in a good mood and thought 'why not'.

    "Sure." Toyo said with a shrug. The not-Goblin smiled a big, contagious smile as Toyo and now the dog lady looked at the second individual as he began to gently float up off the ground. Turning his gaze back at the twinkling star, the new guy suddenly just....disappeared. The only evidence that it wasn't teleportation being the gust of wind that blew over the pair, and the streak going higher and higher into the air, disappearing into the glare of the twinkling light in the sky.

    ".....What?" The dog woman uttered in confusion, a sentiment Toyo couldn't help but share.


    Reaching the exosphere in record time, Kevin squinted once again towards the approaching light and confirmed what he thought he had been seeing from the ground: A comet. A big, fast comet. And if his calculations were correct, and they always were, it was in a direct trajectory for the town. Kevin frowned. That wouldn't do, Pappou's math lessons on the subject of large scale reletivistic impacts was quite clear on what would happen. Unable and unwilling to stand by and let this tragedy happen, Kevin decided he needed to get rid of the Comet. But redirecting it was only delaying the problem, for if it had become a danger now, it would almost certainly become a danger in the future once again. Destroying it was a good solution, but all the fragments would be a new problem. Throwing it out into deep space also held the grim possibility of it becoming a problem in the future for someone else, and that wouldnt' do either.

    Finally, Kevin knew what he had to do. He would toss it into the first layer of his transdimensional plane! It was a vast ,empty, dead land which had nothing of value to lose from such an impact. Though, simply opening a portal to it this close to the planet wasn't an option: The world's thaumological sphere was too much of an interference and it was crucial for the portal to be perfect for this to work. With a giddy smile as he made his plan, Kevin zoomed further towards the incoming comet. Away from Terra's thaumological signature or that of its gauda moon, Kevin found himself able to open the portal he needed......but he had miscalculated: His portal was one way only, and it was facing towards him. Drat, he should have practiced opening portals the opposite way for just such an occasion!

    Not all hope was lost. Taking a steadying breath within the vaccuum, Kevin focused his energies to open a Portal behind the comet. As the transdimensional gateway opened up, he readied himself to do his part. Just like all those games with cousin, Kevin reared back his leg as much as he could, waiting for the comet to come closer. As it finally reached the point of no return, Kevin smiled as he let loose: Spinning rapidly on his own axis, Kevin waited until the last second before, with a mighty kick, he smashed his foot into the comet. The 1000 meter wide ball of iron and ice instantly reversed its trajectory backwards in thousands of pieces, moving many, many times faster than it had been on its initial approach. As Kevin watched it pass through his portal into the first dimensional plane, he yelled with glee as the pieces struck the ground on the other side with enough force to result in a blinding flash of light, as though a second sun had briefly filled the sky out of the window into the other dimension.

    "GOAL!" Kevin cheered. Crisis averted and lives saved, Kevin hummed to himself as he zoomed his way back to where he’d left Bob with those nice people.


    A minute after he had suddenly left, the odd little guy had returned from his trip upwards, the twinkling having suddenly turned into a bright flash before suddenly disappearing. Toyo blinked as the little guy, seemingly smoking from going really really fast, hummed a pleasant tune as he returned and smiled at the two people he’d left on the ground.

    “Thank you for watching Bob for me, sir!” Without another word, and still humming his happy tune, the odd fellow began to merrily skip down the road, aiming himself at the first farmstead in sight. Silence and confusion reigned for a long, drawn out moment before Toyo looked over to the dog woman with a quirked up eye brow.

    “….What just happened?” The only answer the dog woman on the other side of the road could give him was a shrug and a noise of confusion of her own.

    Today was a strange day….At least it wasn’t boring anymore!
    Last edited: Sep 21, 2023
  5. ArsMagna1337

    ArsMagna1337 (Unverified Oracle) (Unverified Omake Machine)

    May 10, 2018
    Likes Received:
    The llama trade is more challenging than destroying the world. You have to provide upkeep to your llamas and ensure they have that new llama smell to attract rich customers. Not only that, but the llama traders are doing mafia-grade underhanded tactics to ensure that their llama trading will always come on top.
  6. TripleMRed

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
    Likes Received:
    (Everybody in the Adventuring and Hero business thinks they’re top shelf, but more heroes and villains have risen and fallen in the shadow war between the Global Llama Conglomerate and the Alpaca Trade Family. Their stories will never be known, and it is better this way lest they realize just how precarious the world order actually is.)
    Tikitau, Yeetboi, Deca and 2 others like this.
  7. ThedudeManBro

    ThedudeManBro The Dudeliest Man on the block, Bro!

    Nov 19, 2018
    Likes Received:
    .... I reiterate: the world will run red with the rivers of blood I will shed if this, the most adorable of Cinnamon Buns, were ever to so much as stub a toe in anyone's misplaced garbage.
  8. Threadmarks: The Llama Seller, Pt. 4.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
    Likes Received:
    "My Lord, I have....Unfortune news."


    "I'm afraid the plot with the comet was.....stopped."

    "Unfortune, but not unexpected. There was always a chance some Hero would put a stop to it. Still, once the comet has made its journey back around the system, we can try again-"

    "Er, I'm afraid that's not quite possible, sire.


    "I'm afraid the comet has, well.....it's gone, sir."


    "Yes sir, completely disappeared."

    "And you did not witnessed what caused this?"

    "I was too far to get a proper view, sire, but it seemed as though an unknown party appeared, summoned a portal, and....well, I was too far for a proper view, but they reversed the comet's course into the portal."

    ".....I see."

    "What shall we do now, sire?"

    "It is of no consequence. While unfortunate this particular scheme has failed, we have other plans that can pick up the slack."

    "Should I search for the culprit behind this event?"

    "No, Heroes are dime a dozen, especially the magical kind. We'll right this off as a one time event and focus on our other plans....However, keep your eyes and ears open, Panoptes. If this is a one off, we have other, proven threats to concern ourselves with. If this is not a one off, however....You know the old saying."

    "Once is happenstance, twice is coincidence, three times is enemy action?"

    "Exactly. Now, enough of this topic. As I said, we have other schemes to attend to."

    "Thank you sir, have a wonderful day!" Kevin was happy as a peach. In the time he'd spent going from farm to farm out here in the outskirts of the town, he'd managed to sell several Super Herd Packages worth of Llamas! It had taken him longer than normal to summon the Llamas to hand them over to their new owners, as he'd spent much of his mystical power on his comet trick earlier that day. Nobody said doing the right thing would be easy, or that it wouldn't be tiring, but in the end, knowing the farmers and the rest of the townsfolk would be safe and live happy, Llama filled lives was more than enough for him.

    With his last sale among the farms completed, Kevin swiftly turned tail and began his journey towards the town proper, aiming himself to go straight for the capital. Smiling, he began to do his usual skips when a wave of weariness suddenly overtook him. Barely stopping himself from faceplanting into the cobblestone road leading into the town, Kevin found himself suddenly coughing and feeling tired. So, this is what it felt like to have an adrenaline crash? He decided he prefered the regular kind of crashing. At least smashing int othe ground at mach speed was fun and left cool trenches in the dirt, this was just, well, tiring!

    "Whoo boy." He muttered to himself as with wobbly legs, he walked over to the side of the road as to avoid being in the middle when people tried to walk down the road. It would be rude to be in their way, after all. "Man, haven't been this tired since I was tiny and small and not huge." He declared to himself. There was a way to pick himself right up, a quirk of his species to aid in situations like this. But Pappou had said not to tap into those reserves unless absolutely necessary, and those had been wise, wise words.....That being said, he had never said that Kevin couldn't use the source of the Reserves directly from the source, rather than the stored up stuff. 11/10, Flawless Logic, courtesty of Cousin! Kevin could never thank him enough for teaching him of the art of 'rules lawyering', whatever a lawyer was. As Kevin understood it, they were some kind of elemental entity that fed on rules, for good or ill. Absolutely terrifying!

    Kevin shook his head. Focus! Get what you need! Refocusing on regaining his strength, Kevin blepped his tongue in concentration as he dug deep to take out the tools that would regain him his power! Well, okay, it would bring him back up to normal, which was still pretty good!

    With a pop, a PB&J sammich appeared in his suited hand, with a second pop summoning a tankered of Llama milk into his other one. Smiling, Kevin bit down into the sugary treat and could already feel his mighty power returning as his stomach stripped the sammich of nutrients in record time before the rest was moved into his Mana Converter to recharge his abilities. Chasing it all down with a cold tankered of milk to provide him with bone strengthening calcium, muscle strengthening protiens, and energy boosting fats, Kevin sighed as he hopped back onto his two feet, feeling reinvigorated. He was far from one-hundred percent, but he didn't need to be to accomplish his goal and sell Llamas to the head of the town!

    Recharged, Kevin continued his journey, only stopping to summon a Llama to follow him into town, to show he did, in fact, have Llamas to sell preemptively! Because that's what a smart Llama Seller would do!


    To say there was jubilation within the office of the Mayer of Cotcher's Town would be an understatement. Against every concievable odd, the impossible had happened and the town had been saved by a miracle! As soon as the clouds had cleared, it was discovered that the Comet that was to destroy them all had, somehow, disappeared! This could only be the work of some Hero who had seen what was coming from a distance and had stopped it preemptively, though whoever they were was a complete mystery. Still, whoever they were, they could only be a great, mighty, powerful, probably ancient and wise Hero, to have dealt with the Comet so quickly and effeciently!

    Despite the celebratory mood, however, Lucian had made it a point to tell his staff to avoid making the news public. 'Oh, we were almost going to be destroyed by a comet impact, but luckily we were saved by an unknown hero!' While doubtlessly many would take this for the good news that it was, in these rural parts there were many superstitious folk who would somehow twist it into a sign to leave. And to be frank, while Cotcher's Town wasn't doing badly for itself, in the context of it being a trade town, it couldn't afford an exodus of merchants and traders, however small this exodus could potentially be. So it would be kept quiet, known only by the town's leadership as they held their personal little party to celebrate the good fortunes the rest of the town would be blissfully unaware of.

    "This is a good sign, Lucian!" His Astrologist who had just hours ago been barely able to contain her panic enough to explain just how monumentally screwed they had all been. "The gods are looking at us favorably!"

    "Nay, I say!" The Master Magician declared, "It was the Creator Themselves that have blessed us!" The Creator, the being said to have made the foundations of Reality and set the Multiverse into motion, was rarely directly worshiped on the world of Terra, who often prayed to their own Pantheon of Ascended Heroes. Still, even Lucian, not much of a praying man himself, had to admit he was feeling convinced to give thanks to someone for this miracle.

    "Regardless of who," Lucian uttered, his voice smooth and hardy from years of practiced political speeches, "We have much to celebrate! Just not too hard, we still have work to do now that we won't be dying any time soon!" He chuckled, which was joined by chuckles of amusement with the rest of his staff. Yes, this was definitly something to celebrate.


    "Please, don't break this one too." The Barding Guild, Cotcher Town Branch's Master of Guitar's had an unamused look as he handed Alyxia a brand new Guitar, fixed and pre-tuned for maximum tavern playing potential.

    "Thank you." Alyxia demurely uttered as she took the guitar in hand. Giving it a few test strums to make sure everything was in order, she quickly broke off to head out as soon as possible.

    "Is that Bad Luck Alyxia?"

    "-nother Guitar? How clumsy can you be-"

    "-I don't understand why she stays here if she can't keep up-"

    "-bsolute disgrace-"

    The words hurt, and they would have had a point, if not for one crucial thing: Alyxia always survived. No matter how bad things got, no matter what trouble the Parties she was in saw, she always made it out in one piece, healthy and intact, if a little frazzled. She took it as a sign that her supposed 'bad luck' was good luck in disguise.....Still, going through Adventuring Parties so often and so quickly was a hastle. She sighed as she made her way into the street. Maybe Adventuring wasn't her calling after all. Sure, she could strum her guitar and boost her party with her song based magics, but maybe her calling wasn't to be the support. Maybe her true calling was to be the scribe of a Hero, recording their adventures and deeds in song? It was a long shot, and maybe it was a bad idea as Heroes took on grander and more dangerous adventures than Adventurers hunting every day monsters or solving ancient puzzles.....But.....maybe if she got a sign-

    "Oh, hello again Muddy Lady!" Alyxia blinked and turned her snout to face the direction she heard the voice from. And found herself staring directly at a Llama. "Down here!" Looking down, she saw the strange little dog faced Goblin creature (Goblin? Gremlin? Some other third thing starting with G?), who was looking up at her with a smile. The same one who had zoomed up into the sky, caused that twinkling star to flash, and then come back down in a minute's time. She blinked. Was he a Hero? Maybe the Llama was a pet or traveling companion? With a smile, Alyxia nodded towards the odd fellow.

    "My name is Alyxia, actually. Who might you be?"

    "My name is Kevin!" He declared. "I sell Llamas!"......What? Maybe it was a gimmick or something, many Heroes have their odd little quirks or gimmicks to market themselves by..

    "Oh, um, okay. Hello, Kevin." She said as nicely as she could given the strange circumstances. "Pardon me for being so forward, but would it be alright if I traveled with you a little bit?" She had made her decision. She'd travel with this little fellow for a little bit. A few days, or a couple of weeks, just to test the waters a little bit to see if her deicion to follow a Hero as his personal bard was the right one or not. Kevin, for his part, just smiled an extremely accomodating smile.


    "Great!" Alyxia declared, a little too excitedly though Kevin either didn't seem to mind or to notice. "Oh, um, one question though: What was with earlier? You know, with that thing in the sky and you flyng up there and all of that?" Kevin's face morphed into a look of concentration, as though he was trying to find the correct words to described what had transpired. Eventually, a look that said he'd thought of something came to his face. A smile broke over his lips as he said:

    "Tell you what, I've got to try and sell some Llamas to the Mayor, but after I do that I can tell you all about it! Deal?"

    "Oh, well, sure!" Alyxia stated. "I don't mind at all!" With a nod, Kevin began to march onwards towards townhall, only now Alyxia was traveling behind him. It was odd, walking alongside a (admittedly very well trained) Llama, but it was hardly the strangest thing she'd ever done. Besides, stopping by to meet Uncle Lucian to tell him of her decision sounded like a good idea so he wouldn't worry! She could feel it in her bones: This was the start of....something. She didn't know what yet, but she was sure it was starting!
  9. Threadmarks: The Llama Seller, Pt. 5

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    The sounds and bustle of the modestly sized town buzzed all around Kevin as he took in the sights, absorbing the information into his mind-meats for safe keeping. As he glanced at the buildings, he found them in an older style compared to some of the wealthier, more advanced regions. The roofs were angled and with curving detailing, smooth from a lack of tiles, and the walls were an unpleasant grey color of local plaster and wood instead of bricks. Over all, 4/10, much uggo in Kevin's opinion.

    The people, however, were much more interesting: A variety of people of various races walked about. Just passing him by was a brown skinned cat woman with colored markings talking with a bewhiskered dog man, while over there to the side in a shop was a Gryphon in adventurer's garb haggling with a wizened Unicorn shop keeper tugging at his tiny beard. Goblins were selling their wares or conversing with one another about the going ons around town, or simply were sunning themselves on the roofs. The only real unifying factor among the populace was their use of wool clothing instead of the cottons or silks used elsewhere, another sign of the local's lack of more bountiful opportunities.

    The economic realities of the situation mostly flew over Kevin's head as he paid attention to the people interactions rather than their status of wealth. For the most part, people in Cotcher's Town were content. Happy to be making money off passing by adventurers and caravans, and to spend days conversing with friends or doing their work. A simple town with a hardy people, something that even Kevin could appreciate. What a nice place to live!


    Cotcher's Town was an okay place to live. To Alyxia, it would always be home and nothing could ever change that or the warmth this place held in her heart, but the fact of the matter was that Cotcher's Town wasn't exactly high end. The buildings were made using older, if proven, methods that were behind the times in the brick and mortar of the other towns and cities, the people were content with their simple lives but they were this way because of a lack of any real motivating chances for wealth or advancement. She loved her town, but it got stifling as soon as one became old enough to appreciate all of these factors.

    So imagine her surprise as the little creature named Kevin walking by her side, with his well made cotton cloak and hat, was looking all around the town with big, wide open eyes of amazement and wonder. He drank in every sight, whether it was Old Man Johnsons buying some sunflower seeds from Mrs. Tulip, or the sight of some Goblin children playing a lazy game of marbles, like it was something new, exciting, and never before seen. It honestly made her the tiniest bit jealous, to be able to see such mundanity with such active wonder, but it was a little feeling that went away quickly. What didn't go away was her curiosity. Who was this fellow? What was that flash a few hours ago? Why was such a Hero incistant on selling Llamas? Wh-

    "Why are the buildings like that?" Kevin asked as he motioned towards the nearest building with his oddly bandage (Was it a bandage? It looked too....well put and solid to be bandages) covered hand towards a house. Alyxia blinked.

    "Oh, well, we use older methods around here because we couldn't afford the materials to buy bricks to renovate every house." Alyxia stated off handidly, using the explination she'd been given by her uncle when she was younger.

    "Why?" Kevin asked with complete innocence in his voice.

    "Well, because it's expensive."


    "Because we don't have enough money to renovate every building in town."


    "Because we don't earn enough money from trade to do it?"


    "Because there isn't enough trade passing through to earn enough money to buy the materials and experts to rennovate every building in town." Alyxia was remarkably patient with the childlike questions Kevin was spouting, but she didn't mind. His innocence cushioned whatever annoyance such insistant singular questioning would have had with her. Regardless, Kevin seemed to understand at last what she meant going by his nod.

    "'kay." He declared as they continued their walk. After a few moments, he spoke up again. "What would help get enough trade to pass the town to earn enough money to buy the stuff and the things to rennovate the town?" He asked curiously. This got Alyxia to mentally pause as she considered the question. That was a good question, one she'd been wondering for a while now, too, even if she never voiced the question out loud due to a lack of means to do anything about it.

    "Well, I suppose if we had something unique to us, something you don't really see in the rest of the region that you could only get here that is also highly desirable, then trade would almost certainly pick up as people start coming back in to buy our goods they can't get anywhere else?"

    "Like Llama wool and milk?" He chimed up. That caused another pause with Alyxia as she considered that. Llama wool and milk for trade? She glanced at the Llama walking beside them, an odd sight that had caught a few eyes as they made their way through the streets. With hairy wool covering its eyes but doing little to hamper its vision apparantly, the Llama had a brilliantly well kept coat of peach color and blue stripes. Llamas were neither native nor common in the region of Red Haven, which would make them a rare commodity. Furthermore, their milk was said to be delicious, nutricious and with health benefits, while the wool was soft, warm, and plentiful. Indeed, as she cautiously placed a hand on the Llama's back to give it a scratch, the well trained animal didn't mind and she found that the rumors were true. The wool of this creature was very soft and plentiful, possibly more so than cotton!

    Kevin might actually be onto something here.


    Kevin smiled at the sight of his new friend, Muddy Lad-er, Alyxia, petting Thomas. He couldn't help but make note of the happy look on her face at that. The dog woman had floppy ears, a brown and cream colored coat of fur with shoulder length head hair of a reddish-brown coloration, her eyes behind her spectacles a pleasant blue color. Her snoot was also impressively long, at least compared to Kevin's own not-huge snout. He wondered how she could see with such a massive shnozzo, but decided against asking her as that might be rude! He knew he didn't like it when people asked him what was wrong with his own snout, that's for sure!

    His ever scattered attention caught sight of another dog, this one white with black spots and pointed ears, and it got Kevin curious. Turning back to look at Alyxia, who was still enthralled by petting Thomas, Kevin piped up with a new question.

    "Why are Doggos so different in looks?" He asked. This caught Alyxia's attention.

    "Hmm? Oh! Well, you see, our people have a long, long history, and through that history we've developed into many numerous breeds." She smiled as she placed a hand over her chest. "For example, I'm a mixed breed of a-Oh, watch out!"

    Turning away from her for a moment, he caught himself just in time to be able to side step a Goblin who had wandered aimlessly into his path. The green skinned fellow realized what almost happened and quickly skidaddled back to the safety of the sides of the streets. With such a near-brush expeirence with imminent face planting into another person's face, Kevin took a moment to recall how he'd occasionally had been called a Goblin by those ignorant of his status as Kevin.

    While of comprable height and with similarly big ears, the differences were many: Goblins were various shades of greens, yellows, and even oranges, but never black: They had a short, fat, stubby tail over their behinds: Their muzzles were distinctly cat like instead of the puppy like shnoz Kevin sported: Finally, while they were of comparable size on average, Goblins could be shorter, taller, and they ranged from muscled to chubby and everything in between. Compared to the average, stocky Goblin, Kevin's own form was lither, even if it was hidden by his clothes most of the time.

    Crisis averted, Kevin returned to his steady walk before Alyxia.

    "You should be more careful of where you're going." She stated.

    "Probably." Kevin agreed. "So, Doggos?"

    "Yes, right!" Alyxia stated, returning on track to discuss her people's morphological variants with Kevin.


    Toyo sighed as he adjusted his straw hat. The Goblin male had found todays work unfulfilling. The trader hadn't been able to move much of anything, with the locals just not being interested in his 'knicknacks' and 'whatchamajiggers'. Not that he could blame them: The curios of a functioning pocket-chrono from the city, or silk clothes were wasted on the more pragmatically minded individuals in Cotcher's Town. It wasn't even that they couldn't afford his stuff, at the prices he was hawking: They simply weren't interested. They had been interested in the seeds and spices he had brought with him, however, so he decided to keep that in mind for the next time he made his way through here during his route.

    As the middle child of the Gobbo's Gobsmacking Trade Goblomerate, Toyo had found himself with the otherwise humiliating job of being a first rank wandering trader, to start himself off. He'd gotten the job 10 years ago, and the best thing about it had been the chance to wander into new, exciting lands, meet new, exciting people, and find new and exciting things.

    Sadly, even before reaching the quiet regions like Red Haven, he'd hit a roadblock on the 'new and exciting' bit and he'd found himself stuck just doing the job with little in the way of excitement to keep himself entertained. Well, that wasn't entirely true: Just earlier that day while he had been on break, there'd been that funny little Llama ferrying Not!Goblin guy who was probably some kind of Hero given the whole 'flying into the sky at hyper velocity' thing. That had been pretty interesting, even if it went by very quickly. If only he could find that little guy again, maybe he could liven up his day once-

    Speak of the devil. Just as Toyo was finishing packing up his wares into his Storage Satchel, he turned around in time to see that very same Not-Goblin walking down the street with none other than that mud covered dog girl he'd seen earlier. She had cleaned herself up, though that now revealed her clothing to be torn and ripped all over. Almost certainly an Adventuress, a Bard at that going by the guitar strapped to her back, that had seen a botched job. Still, she was alive and well, so she must have some luck on her side, no? Toyo wondered how he should approach the pair, or if he should at all.

    Torn between his duty to the job he'd been given, and what could only be some excitement for once, Toyo decided to play it cautiously and follow them for a while to see where they went before he made his decision. After a few minutes of walking, his brow raised as he saw they were heading towards the town hall. Glancing at the Llama by their side, he saw it was a different one from the initial 'bob' he'd encountered hours prior. On a hunch, he theorized this meant some sort of magic being used, though for what purpose he wasn't sure. Hey, maybe this little guy was a Llama seller trying to sell Llamas to the mayor in townhall? Wouldn't that be something!
  10. Threadmarks: The Llama Seller, Pt. 6.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    Lucian was in a good mood. A little bit of drink and some good food will do that to most people, especially if it's in celebration for the best news they've heard in their entire lives. The celebration they had was neither big nor extravagent, mostly just some popped open bottles of Marley Brandy and Veridian Plain Wine, with some hand foods. It was honestly an extremely paltry celebratory 'feast' given the circumstances being celebrated, but their between their work and the fact they wanted to keep the town's near cataclysmic destruction under wraps and they had decided something quick, small, and easily misconstrunable as lunch was the best course of action.

    Besides, everyone was too happy that they'd live to see another day to grumble about not breaking out the fine dining silverware and ruby carpets for the occasion. How surviving an seemingly unsurvivable situation helped people focus on enjoying the simple things in life.

    With that all said and done, Lucian was in a good mood as he made his way to his office and began looking over the paperwork that was awaiting him at his desk with fresh eyes and a happy hum in his throat. Now, to get this sorted out and he could take the rest of the day to relax-

    "Excuse me sir." Lucian looked up to see one of the townguards, namely one of the security personel of the town hall, poking his helmeted head through the door. "You have your niece and an unknown guest awaiting to see you in the main hall."

    "Which niece?" Lucian asked for specification. He just had so bloody many relatives, it was hard to know which one was visiting him.

    "Alyxia, sir." Lucian smiled a fond, if a little sad, smile. Ah, Alyxia. Heart full of adventure, a mind of swiftness and intellect, and a spirit as friendly as they came.....and not much to show for her efforts as an Adventurer. This wasn't to say she was a bad bard: Her voice was like that of an angel, her guitar strumming was among the best in her outfit, and she was brave and willing enough to follow Advnturer's into the heart of darkness time and again.....but her rotten luck always wound up her being kicked out of the party, and her actual mystical ability in enhancing her music to aid her party was mediocre at best. A good soul, but one who didn't seem fit for Adventuring.

    "Well, send her and her guest in." Lucian uttered with a motion of his hand.

    "Er, yes, about that sir. I'm afraid there is a matter involving the guest's pet, and-....I just think it would be best if you came to the main hall to meet them." Lucian didn't frown nor did he sigh. He just raised a single brow in intrigue before giving a nod towards the guard.

    "I see. Well, I'll head down to meet them in just a moment," He stated. "I have a few things to grab first."


    As Kevin stood in the middle of the town hall's main, well, hall, he couldn't help but soak in the details of the interior. The exterior had been prettier than most buildings in the town, with old but strong pillars holding up the roof and actual wood beams making the exterior to give it a down-to-earth look, it still lacked enough colors to really pop out, with only its size making it notable. The interior, meanwhile, was much better decorated, with paintings and statuetes and busts of historical Heroes of the region, or of particularly well liked former leaders in the town's history. Combined with the chandelier bathing the wooden interior with a warm, rich lighting and it made for a wonderful place to stay within.

    "So, this is townhall." Alyxia stated as she motioned about. "I've been here quite a few times, so if you have any questions feel free to as-"

    "How did you manage to capture enough Sun Wisps to make a Chandelier that big?" Kevin asked as he motioned towards the object in question high above them. Alyxia looked up at the Chandelier and its light sources in question.

    "Oh, well, as you know, we don't have that fascinating 'electricity' invention they have in the big cities-"

    "I did not know that!"

    "Oh! Well, we don't, but we do have ancient ingenuity on our side: We capture Sun Wisps as they flutter about during dusk and then we keep them stored to replace our lights when the current ones go dim." Alyxia explained. "It's actually a very interesting thing: Sun Wisps are plant based bundles of magic that capture the light of the sun all day before shining in the night-"

    "I do know that." Kevin interuppted again. "And Sun Wisps aren't actually plants, they're a type of fungus. They form mounds underground that, after enugh time has passed, they spew out their bundle like spores to absorb solar energy during the day to fuel their development during night time. And after they spend all their energy, they float down to the ground to form into a new mound underground and start the process all over again." Alyxia blinked.

    "Forgive me, Kevin, I didn't know you were so well informed." She stated, being shocked at how much knowledge the cutsie, boy like creature had. Kevin just beamed at her.

    "Pappou always said, 'an education doesn't garuntee success, but it helps!'" Alyxia blinked. What a fascinating fellow this was.

    "Pardon me, Kevin, but aren't fungi just a kind of plant?" Alyxia asked, decided to test the waters a little further and see where Kevin's knowledge extended to. "Doesn't that mean there's little point in actually differntiating them?"

    "Fungi aren't plants," Kevin said bluntly, "They are actually a category all of their own in the familial structure of life, and form a third family of multicellular life forms for physical creatures, the other two being flora, IE plants, and fauna, IE animals."

    "I see." Alyxia uttered, fascinated by the this conversation. "What about the non-physical creatures?"

    "Well, that's a lot more complicated, because while we describe the first three as 'physical' creatures and the other life forms of mult-cellular life as 'nonphysical' entities, there is actually a lot of crossover between the two beca-" As Kevin spoke, his eyes wandered the room until they settled on something that made his voice up and die in his throat. His eyes widened and he stood frozen in shock.

    "Kevin? Wha-" Before Alyxia could finish her question, Kevin lifted up into the air as though gravity had lost its hold on him and he gasped a lout, overly dramatic gasp. Alyxia's eyes followed his own and settled on- "Gerty?"

    "Bow!" A little bark escaped the tiny, quadropedal Chicabow, the unofficial mascot for the town. Standing on four stumpy legs, covered in a downy snow white covering so fluffy it made it look like a wad of fluff, and with only the tip of a black, stubby beak poking out where its head was, the Chicabow was the most common pet/livestock in the region. Renowned for their eggs, they also were extremely friendly and trainable creatures that made for excellent pets once accostumed to other creatures and given the right amount of love, affection, and attention by their owners.

    Gerty did not so much as run as she waddled hurridly on her stumpy legs towards the duo, tongue sticking out the side of her short beak and giving the already ridiculous creature a dopey look as she rushed towards them. Stopping just short of the two, Gerdy craned her head (Well, it seemed like she was craning her head, it was all so fluffy that only the movement of her mouth showed where she was looking at) to look up at them. "Bow!" She declared in a mighty and ferocious yip-yap.

    Next to her, Kevin squeeled as he reached out to pet the Chicabow, only to stop just short and freeze in place. Slowly, almost cautiously, Kevin retracted his hands away from the Chicabow. He floated down to sit on his read end, watching as the Chicabow sniffed and poked at his bandaged up, paw like foot. Alyxia smiled as she kneeled down and scratched Gerty's back.

    "You can feel free to pet her, she likes new people." Alyxia said encouragingly. Kevin's eyes seemed to light up, but they froze as if remembering something before he shook his head.

    "'m good." He uttered, though he didn't sound so convinced of his own words himself. Alyxia raised a brow, but shrugged it off as she kept petting Gerty.

    "Well, what have we here?" A familiar suave voice echoed through the hall. Alyxia couldn't stop herself from smiling as she looked up towards the stairwell, where her uncle Lucian was smiling back at her as he made his way down the well towards them.

    "Uncle Lucian!" Alyxia hopped to her feet, spooking Gerty enough to bark at her, while Lucian just smiled at her fondly as he approached.

    "Hello Alyxia. Another bad job I take it?" He asked, refering to her torn clothing. Alyxia blushed in embarressment before nodding.

    "Yes, uncle..."

    "Well, you're alive, and that's what matters." He said as he stopped before them. The guard who had been sent to call him down stayed behind the Mayor, stave up and alert. Lucian's eyes slid off his niece to look at Kevin. "And whom might this be?" Kevin tore his eyes off of Gerty and flung them towards Lucian.

    "Oh, hello sir." He said politely. "Are you the Mayor?"

    "Why yes, indeed I am." Lucian gave a little bow towards Kevin. "Mayor Lucian Wettestone, at your service."


    Kevin was grinning like a madman. He'd gotten to his target, a handsome black, white, and brown blue eyed Doggo man, and now he could do his job! Standing up carefully as to not spook Gerty, Kevin gave a bow of his own.

    "Nice to meet you, Mr. Lucius sir, could I offer you Llamas?" Lucian paused and looked at Kevin with a raised eyebrow.

    "Llamas." Lucian did not ask, but just repeated the word bluntly, like he was tasting a curiosity with his grasp over speech alone. He then glanced at Thomas, who mindlessly chewed his cud, looking at him as if acknowleding something he had been patiently trying to avoid noticing.

    "Yis'm, Llamas!" Kevin declared, motioning to Thomas. "You see, sir, Llamas are extremely loyal, intelligent creatures with a wide, wide range of uses! Their milk is healthy and nutricious, their wool is soft and resplendant for use in clothes or other tactile works, they are intelligent and trainable, and can help keep weeds and other wild plants in check if left out to pasture." Kevin's speech had been practiced and prepared, and it was flawless! However, Lucian seemed to be a tough customer, as he just kept his brow raised and glanced towards Alyxia.

    "You should listen to him, uncle, he might be onto something." Kevin smiled. Alyxia was as new as new friends got, but already she was showing her support as only true friends could. And she supported work for Llamas, which made her an extra true friend! Double-Friend Alyxia!

    "Well, if you say so, Alyxia, I'm willing to hear out out guest here." Lucian stated as he nodded towards Kevin. "Kevin, was it?"


    "I'm listening intently now. Please, do go on about your offer for....Llamas." His voice didn't sound all that convinced, but he was willing to hear Kevin out, and to date Kevin had yet to fail a sale! He wouldn't begin to fail now! Digging deep within himself, Kevin put on his biggest, brightest, bestest friend smile he could manage. With a flash of his power, he summoned forth a visual aid in the form of a chalk board with drawings already strategicalyl placed upon it. The drawings were equations, the most simplest and direct form of mathematics Kevin could muster to demonstrate his point: 'Llama=Gud, More Llama=More Gud, Most Llamas=Most Gud. Maximum Llama Saturation for Maximum Guddliness.' It was astounding, it was genius!

    It was causing Lucian to silently begin wondering to himself if he'd drunk more than he expected back during lunch time.....
  11. Threadmarks: The Llama Seller, End.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    It had been months since the child had arrived, and though Gamil would never admit it, he had gotten used to his presence. Not enough to walk around without some sort of armor on, and definitly not enough to trust the tiny creature, but as the infant was taken care of with parental care and affection by uncle Guyial, Gamil's complaints of it had decreased in volume and frequency until they become purely internal.

    Their home wasn't large by Oberon standards, being a kitchen-dining area, a modest living area, and a secondy story where their two rooms and wash rooms lay. With the addition of the tiny creature, however, plans were being made for additions to the living space. Despite its tiny size compared to the over 7 foot tall, crystal horned equines, it would one day need a room of its own, and Guyial was nothing if not a master of preparation. Even though such necessities were still years away, Guyial already was drawing plans for expansion of a third room for when the time came.

    Indeed, as Gamil walked through the living room to reach the door, he saw crude first draft drawings of just such an expansion on the table. Snorting in amusement at his uncles preparedness, Gamil opened the door to begin the day.....and walked right into a sight he had not been expecting.

    "Uncle, what is that?" The younger of the two Oberon Magi asked. For his part, Guyial smiled as he looked up from his seating position, hands busy at work with their task.

    "What does it look like I'm doing? I'm getting breakfast ready for the little one!" He declared matter-o-factually.

    "And breakfast involves milking a.....what even is that?" Gamil had been living on Terra alongside his uncle for centuries by that point, but where Guyial freely explored the world and its lands, Gamil had been focused on his duty in protecting those that needed aid. This didn't mean he hadn't seen the strange, long necked, wooly beast before, quite the contrary they were quite prominent in the region they had made their lives in, but he had never bothered to find out more about the funny looking beasts after one spat in his eye on a whim.

    "This is a local cameloid creature known as a 'Llama', nephew." Guyial explained as he worked to milk the creature. The infant, in his little whicker basket and wrapped up in a bundle to warm up in the mornng light, lay sleeping beside his uncle's seating spot. "Well, either that or an Alpaca. I never was able to memorize the difference. Either way, this one's name is 'Tulip'. Say hello, Tulip!" The creature stopped its incessant cud chewing to look its bored, borderline dead eyed gaze towards Gamil.

    The ensuing noise made Gamil die a little inside, a terrible terrible sadness at now knowing Mortal creatures could produce such noises making him wish to weep bitter tears. It was a testament to his discipline, however, that he did not break down at the Llama creatures whooping chittering, instead turning a defeated gaze to Guyial. His uncle was looking at him with the biggest piss-drinking grin he'd seen this week.


    "Well? Say hello back! Don't be rude now!" Knowing better than to argue with his uncle, Gamil just sighed as he gave a little bow towards the Cameloid.

    "Hello, Tulip." He declared as earnestly as he could manage for such an inherently ridiculous situation. The Llama (Alpaca?) didn't change its expression, but it seemed to hold its head a little higher, as though it was aware that it had recieved a hello right back. And then it inclined its head in return. Gamil blinked. "....Uncle, is this thing sentient?" He asked.

    "Probably! They're a very odd species of Godling, I'll tell you that much!" Gamil had to physicaly stop himself from turning to look at his uncle in shock. This creature was a Godling!? He didn't even sense it! Great, now that made two of them they had to put up with. As if on cue, the little one opened its mouth in a big yawn before blinking open its big, green eyes, cooing noises coming from it as it looked around. It made a squeel of happiness on catching sight of Gamil.

    "Your breakfast will be ready in a little bit, little one!" Guyial chuckled. "Gamil, play with your little cousin for a little bit while I finish up here!" 'Little cousin'? Seriously? With another sigh, Gamil walked over and plucked the tiny creature from its basket, holding it up in the way that amused it as it babbled with glee. Gamil wasn't sure why it was so obsessed with him, but he'd be damned if he didn't try something to get its attention elsewhere. Walking over in front of the cameloid, Gamil held out the creature to stare direct at the Llama. The reaction was instant: It went silent as its eyes widen and its arms and legs jostled in excitement at seeing something new up-close.

    "Alright you little sucker, meet Tulip, some sort of cameloid abomination." That earned him a spit directed at his head, which he was ready for this time to move out of the way with a little movement of his head. The baby just squealled happily at the action, which Gamil decided to indulge it by moving forward to let it feel the Llama's wool. What happened next was as fascinating as it was unexpected: The baby virtually latched on, clamping its tiny arms around the Llama's neck in a hug. Gamil blinked in surprise as, carefully and ready to take hold again if needed, he let go of the infant and saw it was clinging to the Llama's neck like some sort of adorable parasite. For its part, Tulip didn't seem to mind. If anything, it actually seemed to respond well to the infant, craning its neck down to rub its head against the baby's back.

    "Dawww, look at them." Guyial uttered. "That's a sight we fight to see every day." Gamil supposed, though they fought for Mortals, not Godlings. Still, he supposed it was cute. Kinda. Sorta. Maybe. Possibly. Reaching out to grab the baby, Gamil tugged lightly to remove it from the Llama's neck. He blinked. It was gripping on strong. Very strong for a little baby, even one such as itself.

    "Okay, come on, that's enough of that now." Gamil pulled a little harder. The baby's grip only increased in strength, with a hug that was actually indenting the Godling Llamas' neck. Gamil's eyes widened at the sight. "Uh."


    "I think we have a bit of a situation here." It took them half an hour to finally remove the baby off of Tulip's neck, by coaxing it with the promise of breakfast. This was a sign of things to come, Gamil could feel it in his unbreaking bones....


    Lucian observed the empty field they had chosen for the demonstration. Alyxia had convinced him to listen to Kevin, and though his intitial presentation had been oddly childish in is form, it had been comprehensible. Still, before Lucian could decide to purchase a, quote, 'super-dee-duper bulk order package' of Llamas, he had asked for a practical demostration of their ability to clear grass in a field. The rest of their practical applications were sound enough on paper, but he wished to see them in action with field clearing first hand.

    "Did you have to pick the field we haven't touch in two seasons?" Alyxia asked in only a half-joking manner as she stood beside him to observe the demonstration from the top of the hill. Having changed to an intact green blouse and yellow dress-skirt, she was looking much fresher than she had when she'd come to him an hour ago.

    "I'm not expecting them to clear the whole thing, just enough of it to make it easier to reuse." Lucian explained simply. With that, the pair turned their gazes to look at the tiny figure of Kevin as he stood at the edge of the field, getting ready for the demonstration. Far from all three, a certain Goblin male was sitting down to watch the proceedings from afar as well. In silence, all were in observance as they waited to see what would happen next.


    "Okay, okay, okay Kevin," Kevin murmured to himself as he psyched himself up. He was going to have to pull in a big herd for this one, something he was more than ready for. He just had to believe in himself! "You can do this. You can do this." So this is what cousin had meant about performance anxiety? Yeah, Kevin decided he did not like it one bit at all. Closing his eyes, he focused, trying to open a portal big enough for his flock to come through and do their performance......but he wasn't able to get himself able to do it! He was too anxious!

    It was the quiet. The dreadful silence of the mid-afternoon field. It was interfering with his ability to concentrate!

    .....He had the solution! Putting on his head phones, Kevin took out his music player, closed his eyes, and willed it to activate. Willed it to get a tune that would allow him to focus, to tap into his power and to get that Super-Dee-Duper Bulk Package order through! As if sensing his situation, the first few notes began to play into his ears, and he instantly found himself calmer. Centered. Not a second later, a massive portal opened up, spreading far and wide and in short order, a horde of Llamas marched through, heads held high as they awaited Kevin's command. Kevin, for his part, just smiled as he lifted his arms, spread them out to indicate the tall grass, and declared, "Dig In!" Without needing further orders, the Llamas marched forwards, beginning their sacred art of eating the grass 'til there was none left. After all, the Keviny One has asked this of them, and they were more than willing to endulge their caretaker.

    Floating up into the air to watch the proceedings from a birds eye-view, Kevin smiled gleefully as, in perfect synchronized fashion, the Llamas fell upon the grass in a single, united front. They divided themselves in three rows, the front row eating the top of the grass as they marched forwards, the middle row eating the middle portions, and the back row eating the lowest portions. As all three marched forwards and onwards across the field of plentiful foliage, they left behind nothing taller than two milimeters in height. Not even the flowers hiding among the long grass survived their precise, disciplined columns of Llama gastrological might.

    Their seemingly endless stomachs never filled fully as they continued their march across the field, eating and eating and eating without stopping, or slowing down. Like a well oiled machine dedicated to a single minded purpose, they performed their duty without tiring, without hesitation, and without complaint as they tore through the field. It was a sight that could bring a tear to the eye of any dedicated to the art of effeciency, and it was certainly brining an eye to Kevin as his Llamas made him proud. They had never even practiced anything like this, the little guys just knew what to do thanks to a tight-knit bond between them, a goal to guide them, and plentiful grass to share. Kevin couldn't have been prouder of his little guys!


    Alyxia had expected a lot of things, but to be honest an army of Llamas with more discipline than an actual standing army trimming the overgrown field down below was not one of them. And she definitly didn't expect them to be not only finishing the established parameters, but exceeding them! They were already at the third field and they hadn't stopped to take a break or anything!

    Her uncle gasped next to her, and she turned to look to see he was looking at his pocket-chrono. Her eyes widened as she realized the time. That couldn't be right, there was no way only thirty minutes had passed!?

    "Er, Kevin?" Uncle Lucian called out. "Sir Kevin?" In a flash, Kevin appeared before them, the smile on his face showing just how proud he was of his demonstration, knowing full well he'd exceeded expectations.

    "Yes'm?" He asked.

    "I believe the demonstration is a success." Lucian stated slowly. Kevin beamed at the words he heard.

    "My Llamas' are pretty neat, huh?" 'Neat' didn't really scratch the surface of it! Alyxia had so many questions, but they would all have to wait until after her uncle had finished his deal.

    "Yes, they are." Lucian uttered, glancing at the Llamas still working hard down below. They had finished the third field and were about to start the fourth. "I'll take them. How much is this deal of yours?" Kevin opened his mouth to answer, when he seemed to stop. Face scrunching up in though, he looked back towards the Llamas, as if calculating their worth. Finally, he turned back around with a bright smile and, without any hesitation, answered with:

    "100 Silver pieces!" Lucian and Alyxia just stared at him in silent shock. Kevin frowned and shuffled in place, thinking he'd said something wrong. "....50 Silvers?"

    "You'll take no less than 200 Gold pieces." Lucian broke the silence with a look of certainty.

    "Oh! Are you sure? That seems like a lot-" Kevin began to say, only for Lucian to interupt.

    "If these Llamas are as useful as you say, and this demonstration shows they are very useful indeed, then my town will have an enormous use out of selling their products." Lucian stated firmly. "200 gold pieces is a smal price to pay for such an investment."

    "It's true," Alyxia added, "take the money, Kevin, it's no less than you deserve for what you're selling the town." Kevin still didn't seem too sure, but he ultimately relented.

    "Okay, if you both say so." He declared. He then brightned up, as if remembering something. "Oh! I also sold Llamas to your farms! They can help you with that selling thing, no extra cost!" Lucian's hard face melted into a smile of his own.

    "Thank you Kevin. You have no idea how much this means to me or my town." Kevin didn't say anything further, just beaming at having been thanked. Alyxia couldn't help but smile at the sight of the little guy. Despite the extremely short amount of time they'd known each other, she found that seeing him happy was making her happy. There was no denying it, following him and writing his story was going to be a trip and a half!

    "Now then, I do believe we have a contract to sign to seal this deal, no?"


    Kevin was in a good mood. So good, he had to be mindful of disrespecting gravity as he walked. He had sold an enormous batch of Llamas, helped a town not once, but twice, and he'd gotten a new friend! Who had a guitar! He wondered if she could play songs? As the pair made their way out of the townhall, Kevin was regailing her with his Llama care routine as was detailed in the owners guide he'd given to Mr. Lucius for free, when a wide eyed Goblin man with a hat came into their path. As Alyxia looked on with curiosity, Kevin just smiled as he recognized the fellow.

    "Oh hello, sir! Thank you for looking after Bob while I was away!" The wide eye'd Goblin male just nodded at his words.

    "Good to see you too, uh, you." The Goblin uttered. "Say, I was, uh, watching you out on the fields, with the Llama thing, and I was wondering if you had room for one more in your party?"

    "Of course!" Kevin stated, "But this isn't a party: We don't have any cake or pinyatas full of candy! We're more like a traveling group." Kevin uttered earnestly. The Goblin blinked as he glanced over at Alyxia, who for her part just shrugged at Kevin's Kevinism.

    "Er, well, thanks! I promise you won't regret it, uh-"

    "Kevin! And who might you be, sir?"

    "Name's Toyo. Traveling Salesman." Kevin gasped, lifting up in the air as he did so.

    "No way! I'm a Traveling Llama Salesman! We should trade tips!" Toyo blinked at Kevin's response, before a small but genuine smile broke through his lips.

    "Yeah, I think I'd like that, Kev." Kevin just beamed. Two new friends! What a day!

    "Well, uh, Toyo, it's nice to meet you." Alyxia stated. "My name's Alyxia and-goodness." She uttered as she realized the time of day. "It's getting rather late. We should probably find an in to stay in, or-"

    "Oh, no need." Kevin said, "I always carry my home with me? Here, let me take you there!"

    "Wait, what-" Before Toyo could ask anything, Kevin's eyes glowed gold, he sang the song of angels, and in a flash, the world became Llamas.
  12. TripleMRed

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    (With that, chapter 1 of the story has finished being crossposted to QQ! Chapter 2 is finished and will be crossposted tomorrow, while Chapter 3 has yet to be completed, but what currently exists will be crossposted until the story is up to date on here as well as the other locations it is on. I hope you all enjoy what's out so far, and that you'll enjoy what is to come!)
    ArsMagna1337 and ThedudeManBro like this.
  13. SpookedCommentator

    SpookedCommentator A Commentator Who is spooked of what's behind him.

    Jun 19, 2022
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    Is it possible for the Llama's with Hats to become his henchmen in selling Llamas?
  14. TripleMRed

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    (The possibility of this is below 1 percent, but never entirely zero.)
  15. SilentCrowd

    SilentCrowd Pls help my Cat has taken over my house

    Jul 13, 2022
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    Author can you add Arceus is best lamma and those hu disagree fight me!
    ArsMagna1337 likes this.
  16. TripleMRed

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    (I am sorry, crossovers are not an option. BUT! There will be something special, just give it time!)
    dogbertcarroll and ThedudeManBro like this.
  17. SilentCrowd

    SilentCrowd Pls help my Cat has taken over my house

    Jul 13, 2022
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    Ah I misspelled what I meant I was talking about Arceus being the name of the Llama like God Bidoof so in a later time we could call the Llama God Arceus.
    ThedudeManBro likes this.
  18. Threadmarks: Have Friends, Will Travel, Pt. 1.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    In the ten or so years that Toyo had been a traveling salesman for his family's humble trading company, he'd gone to the farthest of lands and seen the most stunning of sights on the continent of Amilia on Terra. From the awe inspiring Infinity Falls in the northern Maple Holly region, to the rugged and stoic Spinetooth Mountain ranges leading down to the southern regions, to the wonderous sculpted landscape territories owned and inhabited by powerful, retired Heroes, he'd seen much in his adult life since he'd begun his career journying and trading.

    Alyxia, meanwhile, had been adventuring for 8 years, and in that time she'd visited ancient and weathered sky-temples, helped raid decrepit and worn down tombs and dungeons, seen and defeated hundreds of nightmarish creatures that still haunted her memories to that day, and made wonderful memories as she sang and played her guitar to help allay the wounds of her companions. Even if in the end her Adventures ended in failure, she didn't regret going on them and seeing all kinds of amazing things during her journies.

    So it said a lot when both of them arrived in the Transdimensional Llama Plane, they were both equally floored by what was waiting for them: Endless fields of verdant grass broken up by azure, sanguine, and citrus flours, dotted by both single, patches, and spread out forests of ruby, orange, and violet hued trees, their branches thick and heavy with a variety of plump, richly colored fruits. Spread across the planes were Llamas, Llamas as far and wide as the eye could see and more dazzlingly colored than the lands they grazed and meandered lazily through. Breaking up the planes were the trees and forests, but also hills, hills that ever so gently rose up and down like tidal waves of earth that almost seemed to move as the gentle but ever present breeze caused the foliage on them to sway in sweeping torrents. With the sun, an orange disk in the alien sky of star like lights in alien formations, in its noon positon as it began to dip below the foreign horizon, it bathed the entire land in a hauntingly beautiful orange hue and purple sky, the fluffy marshmellow like clouds painted the same hue as the falling light fell over them.

    It was like living inside of a gentle, idealic painting.

    But wild plants, sweeping hills, and hordes of wandering cameloids were only part of the picture. Orchards of grapes of all colors were mixed with groves of peanuts, both crops growing in parralel to one another in even rows. Not far was a small, adorable little cottage and a pair of what looked like large storage sheds. And there, standing before them both, taking in a deep breath before letting it out in a long, contented sigh, was the odd little creature that had brought them here on a flash of light and the songs of Heaven.

    Kevin stood there, drinking in the sights of his home, for no matter how many times he returned to it, he always felt a wave of contentment and joy roll over him like a wave of plane-winds rolling over the hills. Indeed, as he took in the sights, the winds seemed to wash over him as though an old, unseen friend was welcoming him back with a hug. He'd actually almost forgotten about his two new companions when he turned around and saw them staring at him with slack jaws and wide open eyes.

    Alyxia, in her green blouse and yellow dress-skirt, fragile looking spectacles, rusty red travel pack and well made Bard's guitar, and the grass-green Goblin male Toyo. The Goblin's eyes were red, and the locks of his hair that poked out from beneath his sun-bleached straw hat was a purple hue typical of his people, while his well muscled and stocky frame was covered up by baggy traveler's clothes and a traveler's Storage Satchel.

    Overall, the two looked like world traveled individuals in their own rights.

    "What's the matter?" Kevin asked, genuinely confused by their awed reactions. "Haven't you guys seen a sunset before?"

    "Kevin," Alyxia began slowly, remaining in place as she slowly looked around, drinking in the sights as she did so. "Where, exactly, are we?"

    "Oh, this is my Transdimensional Llama Plane!" He stated as if talking about pleasant weather, which granted the weather here was quite pleasant. A confused look grew over his face. "Have you never been to a Transdimensional Llama Plane before?" He asked.

    "Nobody has." Toyo uttered as he joined Alyxia in his gazing. Kevin giggled.

    "Of course they have, silly." Kevin said. "I live here, so obviously I see it all the time!"

    "Nobody normal has." Toyo corrected himself absentmindedly, eyes widening when he realized what he'd said. Kevin frowned a bit.

    "I'm normal." Kevin said with a pout. "I make grape jam and peanut butter! I shampoo and condition my Llamas every day! I drink milk!" He declared, trying not to be huffy as he said it. Toyo, for his part, just raised and motioned his hands in an attempt to appease Kevin.

    "I didn't mean to offend you, kid, just nobody, uh, not you, has seen a place like this." Toyo said, trying another, more diplomatic approach like he had learned to do with some of his more outgoing and eccentric family members back home. "People like us, you see."

    "Yes, I don't think I know anyone whose been to a, er, 'Llama Plane' before." Alyxia nodded in agreement. Kevin's mouth broke out into a silent 'oh' as realization struck him. It didn't remain silent for long, however.

    "Oooooh." He said outloud. "I getcha. Yeah, not a lot of folks come here to visit, except Cousin or Pappou, but they haven't been here in a while." Actually, he hadn't seen either of them in a while, ever since he started his career. It was kind of hard to stay in contact with family what wiht all the traveling, and the last time he saw them both they were getting ready for a job of their own, which given the nature of their proffesions as Magi meant that neither could be contacted even if Kevin fished out and tried to use the long distance Vox Gems they used to stay in contact. A gnawwing emptiness started to form inside his belly, but he pushed it away. They were alright, and he'd see them again. They had to be, and he had to, so they would!

    Alyxia, meanwhile, seemed to perk up at hearing them being mentioned. "Pappou? Isn't that Hellenisian for 'grandfather'?"

    "Grampa." Kevin nodded. "Though, I guess technically he's more of my uncle, since he's Cousin's uncle, but Pappou fits him more, I thinks." Kevin said with a thoughtful look in his eyes. "He's like a gramps to me, anyway."

    "I have a few uncles and aunts like that." Toyo chuckled, while Alyxia gave a little smile of her own.

    "Yes, Uncle Lucian has always been more like a grandparent to me than my uncle. It helps that he's older than my parents." She added with a giggle. Kevin smiled at his two new companions. Pappou had always told him not to consider new people his friends so soon after meeting them, but he couldn't help but feel that way. It was nice having people with him instead of it being just him and his Llamas. This wasn't to say he didn't love his Llamas and Alpacas and other creatures within his realm, he did dearly, but there was only so much conversation you could have with the bleating yelps of the cameloids, and the less said about the feverish devotion of the rest the better. Having people he could just have a conventional, normal conversation with, to bond over mutual family habits.....it was nice. He decided he would like more of this going forward. But first, he had responsibilities!

    "Oh! I almost forgot!" Kevin declared as he looked over to the Llama hordes. "I have to do my chores before bed time!" With that and a burst of air as he burst towards the Llamas to begin his nightly sessions, he stopped as he remembered his guests. It would be rude to just leave them behind, and Pappoud didn't raise no rude boi!

    Appearing before them so fast it was as though he hadn't even left for a fraction of a second, Kevin smiled gently at his two companions as their gazes towards him turned from awed to a little concerned by that sudden display of power.

    "Do you guys wanna help me with my Llamas?" He asked.

    "Oh, uh, sure." Toyo uttered, while Alyxia just nodded. Smiling an even larger smile now, Kevin summoned forth sets of brushes and handed them to his guests.

    "Great! I'll show you how to do brushies!" With another flash, the air was filled with scores upon scores of brushes. "All of the brushies!" Toyo and Alyxia shared a glance. Despite knowing less about the other than what little they knew about Kevin, the two were silently and quickly starting to realize that they would be the only source of sanity the other could rely upon during their time in this strange, strange land.


    The next few hours should have been exhaustive work. Llama wool, while soft, was plentiful and needed a lot of work to brush out all of the tangles and other things that happened to it after 24 hours without a solid brushing. Combined this with literal hordes of Llamas, and you had a recipe for a long, exhaustive work session. It should have been exhausting.

    But it wasn't. The knots in the wool were undid quickly and effecienty with the gentle brushing strokes that Kevin had taught them, and perhaps a little bit of magic in the brushes themselves. Between this and Kevin's army of enchanted brushes doing the majority of the flock, Toyo and Alyxia found what should have been a grinding chore to be a relaxed, pleasant experience. It only became more relaxed as the pair started to talk to one another about anything and everything. The current topic they had landed on being-

    "Have to admit, if you told me at the start of my job a decade ago I would one day find myself in a magic Llama land, brushing magic Llamas with a magic brush as some sort of magic puppy-faced dog guy zoomed around all magic like-" Toyo was saying to Alyxia as he waved his brush around while he rubbed his free hand through the soft wool of Llama whose wool covered up their eyes like bangs, "I'd have said to them 'Buddy, you need to lay off the drinks, or give me whatever you're having'." Alyxia let out a tittering giggle.

    "Oh, I know what you mean, and I use music magic on my guitar as my job." She said as she rooted out a stick from the head wool of a young Alpaca. It rubbed its head against her in thanks for her service. "Let me tell you, dungeon-crawling and monster slaying has done nothing to prepare me for any of this."

    "I'd love to know what someone has to do or experience to be ready for-" Toyo motioned his brush around all around them. "This whole situation."

    "Well, Llama farms exist in our world-" Alyxia began, only for Toyo to interupt.

    "Alyx, I don't think any Llama farm in the world can match this place."

    "Oh, agreed." The she-dog nodded. "Though, I have to wonder, how did he come into position of such a place?"

    "Maybe he made it?" Toyo shrugged, and that earned him another titter from Alyxia.

    "I have no doubt Kevin is quite powerful, but I don't think even he can make a whole pocket dimension." She stated.

    "Wanna bet on that?" Toyo asked with a mischivious grin. Alyxia chuckled and gave him a narrow eyed grin of her own.

    "10 silver says he didn't."

    "15 says he did."

    "Wh-you can't ask for more than what your opponent is offering! That's not how bets work!" Toyo shrugged.

    "Goblin rules, Alyx, now you going to take the bet or are you going to whimp out?"

    "Fine." She grumbled. "I'll take that bet." Toyo's grin just grew wider as he looked up to where Kevin was overlooking his cameloid brushing from on high. "Hey, Kev!" The Goblin called out. For his part, Kevin turned to look at Toyo, which was to say he was now upside down instead of just turning to look at Toyo's direction.


    "Did you make this magical Llama plane?"


    "You serious?"

    "Like spicy on a fire-toad!" Toyo just looked at Alyxia triumphantly, while she rolled her eyes.

    "How long ago did you make this place, Kevin?" She asked him.

    "Since I was 15!" Alyxia froze. Even Toyo stopped, wide eyed in shock at hearing those words.

    "Er, Kevin?" Alyxia began slowly. "How old are you?"

    "Oh, I'm 18 right now, but I'm turning 19 in a few months. The party won't happen until I meet up with Pappou and Cousin in who knows how long, tho!" Alyxia dropped her brush. Her eyes met Toyos and the two of them shared a single thought despite saying no words: Who the hell had they started traveling with?
  19. Threadmarks: Have Friends, Will Travel, Pt. 2.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    An awkward silence reigned between Toyo and Alyxia as the pair finished a final pair of Llama, completing the chore as Kevin, still floating in the air, directed his Llama hordes out to pasture for the night. The Goblin and the she-dog both stared wide eyed at the powerful creature they had both decided to follow for the sake of adventure, silently wondering to themselves if they had made the right choice.

    "Hey." Toyo uttered to Alyxia, who turned her attention to him. For his part, Toyo continued to stare at Kevin as he spoke. "So, have you gotten a chance to ask him about whatever that light in the sky was yet?" Alyxia blinked.

    "Actually, I haven't quite had the chance to yet." She admitted. "I did ask him when I first saw him again, but he said he would tell me after he was finished selling Llamas to town hall back home." She paused. "Well, technically, 'back home' is right where we are, spatially speaking, as we were pulled into a pocket dimension while still within the confines of the town, so assuming this place follows even the most basic of pocket dimensional principles, we are technically still within the town's borders in 'real' space." She blinked. "Oh, goodness, did that make sense?" Toyo didn't have a formal education in the ways of the arcane, having instead gotten his smarts in the ways of trading and market values, but that didn't mean he didn't catch what she was throwing.

    "We're probably still in town, just in a place that isn't in the same plane as town, got it." Toyo uttered with a thumbs up, causing Alyxia to giggle. "But yeah, we might wanna ask him about that when we get a chance to. I don't know about you, but making a pocket dimension at 15 doesn't sound like something the average person can do."

    "It isn't." Alyxia stated. "Or at least, no regular person I've ever heard of. However, given what we've seen of him so far, I think it's safe to say that Kevin is far from what most people would classify and consider as 'normal'." It was now Toyo's turn to nod.

    "Yeah. Recommendation though? Don't say that to his face. The little guy didn't seem to like us implying he wasn't normal." Alyxia's eyes brightened as she recalled just that.

    "Goodness, you have a good point. Quite perceptive, actually!" Toyo just shrugged.

    "I was the middle kid of a couple dozen brats. With that many brothers and sisters, you learn to pick up a thing or two." He explained as if it wasn't a big deal.

    "That would explain it." Alyxia nodded. "I was the youngest, so I suppose my siblings had to learn such things by watching me while I never got an example to learn from myself." Toyo chuckled.

    "I think you'll have plenty of practice-"

    "Sorry about that guys." The two found themselves interuppted as Kevin finally came down to greet them. "Stale Melon was being cranky, so I had to move him myself. What'd I miss?" He asked cheerfully.

    "Oh, well, Toyo and I were just talking about our family." Alyxia half-truthed. "Lots of siblings for the both of us, though I was the youngest in mine."

    "Middle for me." Toyo raised a finger. "Say, Kev, what's your family like? I think you mentioned an uncle and cousin before?" Kevin's eyes brightened up a great deal as he hopped up joyfully at getting to speak of his loved ones.

    "Oh yeah!" He yipped. "Pappou and cousin! They've been taking care of me ever since I was little-ittle teeny-weeny worm-baby, which must have been silly for them because they're like, extra huge." He giggled. "But that's okay, because they were really careful and goodly at taking care of-" Kevin paused, coughing into his bandaged (?) fist, settling down and stopping his excited hopping. "I mean, they were extremely careful and caring guardians." Kevin explained in a much more subdued sort of way. Alyxia and Toyo both blinked at this change. "Apologies, I've been so excited all day that I've been forgetting to not let my excitement overtake me. I know most folk would find it strange if I don't keep a level head."

    "It's, er, quite alright, Kevin." Alyxia stated. "You have nothing to apologize about. If I'm being perfectly honest, I was quite enjoying your energetic nature." Now it was Kevin who blinked in surprise.

    "Really?" He asked.

    "Yeah, kid, don't worry about it." Toyo waved his hand. "Like, I can see it, acting like you're hopped up on twelve bags of sugar sends the wrong message, but you don't have to act all stuff around us." The Goblin male smiled a friendly grin. "It kinda reminds me of my little brothers. It's nice." Kevin leaped up into the air and gasped before catching himself and sitting back down. He smiled gratefully at them.

    "Thank you." He declared, shuffling as he considered what to do next. Toyo coughed to get his attention before popping the question.

    "Say, not wanting to be rude but what was that earlier today?"

    "Huh? Oh! I was selling Llamas because it was my job and I thought selling a large number of them to the town would-"

    "Er, no, I mean, before that." Toyo interuppted. "With the light in the sky?"

    "Ooooooh." Kevin oh'd, realization hitting him. "You don't have to worry about that, I took care of it!" He smiled with a charming toothy grin. Toyo shared a glance with Alyxia before he coughed.

    "Well, I believe you when you say that, but I'm still pretty curious as to what that actually was." Toyo explained.

    "I would like to know as well." Alyxia stated. "You see, I decided to follow you to, well-" She coughed into her fist in a sense of self-conciousness. "I....was hoping to be your scribe? To follow you around and tell your story of your deeds and adventures." Kevin blinked.

    "Wait, you wanna make songs about me?" Alyxia gave an embaressed smile.

    "Well....yes." Kevin bashfully rubbed his foot into the ground, waving at her with his hand as his cheeks lit up red.

    "Dawwww, lil' ol' me?" He cooed. "I'm honored!" He looked at Toyo next. "Are you going to write songs too?" He asked genuinely. Toyo just gave a smile of his own, his embarresment not showing as he admited his reasoning:

    "Actually, I'm a wandering trader, and, well, I was thinking we could team up and sell our wares together. You sell your Llamas, and I sell my doodads and thingamajiggers."

    "Woo! Trade buddies!" Kevin cheered, pumping his fists into the air in celebration.

    "But first, Kevin-" Alyxia spoke up, "We would like to know about the light in the sky. I'm sure it really isn't anything to worry about, but, well-"

    "We're curious, kid." Toyo added. "You gotta admit, if you were in our position, you'd be curious as all get out too, no?" Kevin seemed to take their words to heart as a contemplative look came over his face.

    "Weeeeelll....Okay." He looked up at the night sky of his realm as he recalled what happened. "So, there was this big ball of ice and metal that was coming towards the town really fast, which would have hurt a lot of people, so I went up there and took care of it." Toyo nodded along, following the story while Alyxia frowned.

    "Wait....There was a comet heading for town!?" She asked in surprise. Toyo's eyes widened as he realized now what Kevin meant by 'big ball of ice and metal'. Kevin, meanwhile, nodded in response before waving her off.

    "Yeah, but you don't have to worry about it. I took care of it!" Alyxia remained wide eyed, but not at Kevin's feat. Given his abilities displayed, him taking care of a comet wasn't out of the realm of possibility for a Hero of his level of power, youth be damned. Indeed, in the short spand of time seeing him at work, while it would never stop being wonderous to see his mystical miracles, the Bardess was quickly growing accustomed to them, and she was certain Toyo was too.

    No, Alyxia was wide eyed because of the realization that, had Kevin not been there, had he not done whatever he had done to stop it, her town.....her people.....All of it would be gone. Toyo, meanwhile, knew enough about kinetic impacts to know that 'big fast thing hitting other thing=bad thing', and he was rapidly realizing how close he'd come to an early grave. The two stood there, eyes wide and minds horrified by the near untimely fates they had almost suffered. Kevin frowned.

    "Hey." He called to them. They didn't answer, still stuck in their tupor. "Hey!" He called out, loud enough that it shook them out of their shock to stare at him. "You guys don't have to worry." He said, his frown replaced with a big, friendly smile. "Things were looking bad, yeah, but it's all okay now because nothing bad happened in the end!"

    "But if you weren't there-" Ayxia began.

    "But I was there." Kevin interupted. "And I did stop it." He looked from Alyxia to Toyo, looking between the two of them to give them equal amounts of his attention. "You can stay up forever and ever asking 'what if Kevin wasn't there', and you can always scare yourselves thinking about what maybe could have happened, but it doesn't change the fact that I was there, and I did stop it, and now everyone has Llamas and can live happy, Llama-tastic lives together." He nodded as his magic flashed an several objects appeared in the air.

    "Now, I'mma ask you two: Are you going to spend your whole lives asking and scaring yourselves of what could have happened......or are you going to be happy it didn't, hug your friends and play with Llamas and enjoy your lives knowing you're still alive?" Alyxia stared at Kevin, stunned by this sudden wisdom. This little fellow was just full of constant surpises.

    "He's right." Toyo uttered, his wide eyes slowly starting to return to their normal sizes as he accepted Kevin's words. "I don't wanna live in fear of what could have been." Toyo stated, a confident look on his face. "I could be dead tomorrow, but I wouldn't want to die in fear and worry. I wanna live life and enjoy it while it lasts." Kevin smiled at the Goblin's answer as he mystically handed him a tankered of what seemed to be milk, and a sandwhich of grape jam and peanut butter. Toyo took the offered foods and without hesitation took a bite of the sandwhich before chasing it down with some of the milk. His eyes were closed as he enjoyed the taste, indeed enjoying it more as the knowledge of what he had unwittingly survived and would live to tell the tale of what had happened. Kevin looked to Alyxia, smile still on his face as he offered her the food and drink floating around him.

    Face softening into a smile of her own, Alyxia took the offered items gently.

    "Thank you, Kevin." She said. "We needed to hear that." For his part, Kevin just smiled as he sat down and took a sandwhich and tankered of his own and began to enjoy the meal. Alyxia and Toyo joined him in sitting in the grass, and the trio spent a long moment of the shared meal in silence, simply enjoying one another's company.

    "This is very good." Alyxia finally said after a while, while Toyo nodded and made noises of agreement. Kevin beamed with pride.

    "Thanks! I make them myself! Well, not the milk, the Llama make that, but I collect it from them!" He giggled. "I've stocked up for a while, but when the time comes for me to restock, I'd love to show you guys how I make my peanut butter and jam!"

    "Sounds like a plan, Kev." Toyo declared.

    "I think we'd love that." Alyxia added. With that, the rest of the meal was had in further silence, and then preparations for sleep were made. Alyxia and Toyo would have pleasant dreams awaiting them that night, dreams of jam and peanutbutter sandwhiches and Llamas leaping across the stars.
  20. Threadmarks: Have Friends, Will Travel, Pt. 3.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    Alyxia stared up from her position laying on the grass, the sleeping bag she often used for outdoorsing on Adventures still comfortable despite its years of use. Before he had departed to his cottage to sleep, Kevin had offered a place in it for his two new companions to sleep in, or for him to make them a sleeping place of their own, but Alyxia and Toyo both declined the offers, at least for tonight. Used to sleeping beneath the stars, the Goblin and the dog woman both stared at the alien sky above them.

    The charming, otherworldly nature of Kevin's realm was not only on the surface, but in the skies as well. Where the skys over Terra were dotted by a splattering of stars at random, with constellations being constructs of their positioning and imagination, Kevin's sky was nothing but constilations, and not the kind where you had to squint and use your mind to make out the images. Lovingly crafted formations made out the outlines of many images, from animals to heroic figures, to things as simple as a pair of big and small dipping utensils. It was artestry that only a mind of pure wonder could craft, which made it perfectly logical to be in a place made by their host.

    The thing that caught their attention, and their debating, however, was not the stars, but another celestial object.

    "You ever seen a moon like that?" Toyo asked. Alyxia stared at the marble like sphere in the sky that acted as the moon of this realm, its bright light casting a refreshingly lit night time.

    "No, never." She admitted. "I can't tell what kind of cheese it's made of."

    "Ours is Gouda, right?" Toyo asked.

    "Yes, our moon is Gouda." She confirmed. It was a natural phenomenon observed throughout the cosmos that the moons hanging over every world was, in fact, made of some kind of cheese, hardened like rock but perfectly preserved and perfectly edible if mined and prepared. Terra was no different, with it having a moon of Gouda cheese hanging overhead in its night sky. Nobody knew when or how this phenomena came to be, as ancient texts spoke of moons made up of rock and minerals instead of edible dairy products, but regardless of when it happened, it happened so long ago that it was no just a commonly accepted fact of life, with Moon Cheese being a highly desired commodity in Terra's luxury markets. Still, without proper instruments or a sample, it was impossible for Alyxia to tell what kind Kevin's moon was made of, or of it was made of rock instead, something Alyxia told Toyo.

    "A moon made of rock." He said out loud, the concept foreign and amusing to him. "What would the Moon Rabbits mine up there? Gold? Silver?"

    "Depends on the composition, I think." Alyxia shrugged. "Comets and asteroids have varying compositions, so presumably a moon made of inorganic material would follow a similar varying pattern." Toyo scratched his chin as he contemplated the marble like orb high above them in Kevin's sky.

    "Must make a killing on mining rights either way." He paused to glance over at Alyxia. "You seem pretty educated and on the up and up, Alyx. When do you think normal folk like us will be able to visit the moon and other planets? I hear Heroes can do it all the time." Alyx paused as she gave it some thought. As an Adventurer of several years, Alyxia was far from a 'Normal' person like Toyo, but her level of power definitly pailed in comparison to high level Adventurer's and even lower level Heroes. This functionally meant she was in the same social stata as Toyo, as far as such a question was concerned.

    "Hard to say. The big cities have all sorts of wonderful inventions, like Sky Ships and Trans-Dimensional Gates linking them together. But while I'm not fully versed in their mechanics, I know they're a lot more limited than what the common folk believe and what most authors envision them to be like in their novels." She freely admitted. "For example, the Trans-Dimensional Gates have a limited range and simply don't work outside of Terra's thaumological field. So even if we fixed the range issue, you just plain can't link them between our world and, say, the moon. At least, not with the ones we have, anyway." Toyo just whistled.

    "I've traveled through a couple of those in some of the smaller cities I visited. Turns a hundred thousand step journey into ten." He glanced at her. "Guess popping up on the other side of the world in one trip ain't happinin', huh?" Alyxia shook her head.

    "Not with what we currently have, not." Toyo nodded in comprehension.

    "Guess that's why we still use trains and sky ships for cargo hauling." He chuckled. "You know, I always wanted to be a train conductor when I was growing up."


    "Oh yeah, ever since I saw one leaving a station in one of the big cities as a youngster, I always dreamed of driving one and blowing the whistle whenever I wanted." He laughed. "But then I got old enough to learn the family trade and the next thing I knew, I was with my family's branded satchel and a sturdy pair of walking boots and that's how I became-" He motioned to himself. "This whole situation."

    "I'm sorry to hear that." Alyxia said with genuine sympathy. For his part, Toyo shrugged.

    "Eh, I got over it quick enough. Besides, as fun as running a train could have been, I'd always be stuck on the tracks. You just plaine can't see some of the best views if you're not taking the foot routes."

    "I know what you mean." She said with a smile. "Convience can't make up for seeing an Evertree for the first time, or when you're at the Infinity Falls."

    "I've been to Infinity Falls, absolute gorgous vistas." Toyo said. "Course, I almost fell down the 'falls the time I was there, but you know, still beautiful." Alyxia giggled, which earned a coy grin from the Goblin male. "What, I tell you I almost die and you laugh at me?" Just as quickly as she had been amused, she was now trying to formulate an embarressed response when Toyo interuppted with a laugh of his own. "Relax, Alyx, I'm just teasing." He smiled. "You're a Bard, right? You've gotta have some near death experiences you look back and laugh at, right?"

    "Er, well-" She adjusted her glasses. "Maybe. Perhaps, one or two."

    "It's alright if you don't wanna share." Toyo said with a wave of his hand before a yawn overtook him. "Besides, it's getting late and it's a nice night to get some snoozin' in." With that, he settled into his sleeping mat, covered his eyes with his hat and rested his hands on his still clothed belly. "Night, Alyx!" Alyxia blinked as the snoring from Toyo reached her ears, leaving her to her own contemplations as she laid there, still staring at the sky. The cool night breeze felt nice on her muzzle, while the gentle moonlight somehow didn't interfere with her ability to close her eyes. The naggling, treacherous thoughts of her unwitting near doom naggled at her, but Kevin's wise words and Toyos agreement with the sentiment to simply enjoy what did happen instead of worrying about what could have happened managed to soothe her mind. Placing her glasses into their protective pocket of her blouse, she closed her eyes, and let her mind drift into pleasant dreams of Peanut-Butter and Jelly Sandwhiches and Llamas amongst the stars.


    In comparison to the awe and wonder of the previous day, the following morning felt downright mundane. The morning sun roused both Alyxia and Toyo from their sleep, they got around to their daily routines of stretches and a breakfast of canned goods respectively, and both were bright eyed and awake to see that Kevin was already both awake and quite busy.

    At a distance, the 4'2 tall creature was zooming about in the air, tending to his Llama herds with proffesional diligence and care that belied by his whimsical nature, not noticing his guests until he saw them making their way over to him across the plains. Kevin quickly made his way to them, a happy smile on his face.

    "Hey all!" He declared cheerfully. "I'm just doing my daily chores right now! If you guys want, I can give you a tour of the place before I do my training!" Toyo couldn't suppress a chuckle as he imagined what sort of training Kevin would be involved in. The thoughts of him practicing his hugging or using his magic to juggle Llamas played in his mind and he couldn't help but laugh a little at the mental image.

    "Sure thing, Kev." Toyo said with a friendly smile of his own. With a squeel of excitement, Kevin clicked his heels (Did he have heels with those stubby, paw like feat?) together before zooming off to finish his daily Llama tending routines. Half an hour later, he returned, and began his tour by motioning to the fields behind him.

    "These," He declared, "Are the Llama Fields. This is where I keep my Llamas." The obviousness of the statement seemed to amuse both Toyo and Alyxia, who couldn't help but chuckle and giggle at the blunt statement. Before they knew it, they were gently picked up by an unseen force of magic before being taken alongside Kevin to a similar patch of land, but with a different set of cameloids. "These are my Alpaca Fields. This is where I keep my Alpacas." The chuckling increased in intensity, but didn't become full out laughter out of an attempt to avoid hurting Kevin's feelings. Kevin, for his part, just took the chuckles and giggles as a good sign as he continued.

    "This is where I grow my grapes and peanuts for making my grapes and peanut butter." He said as he took them to his orchard. "I already did that the other day before we met, so I won't need to do it for a while, but I think you guys will have a ton of fun with the process! It's very involved, except making the jelly which I use special magic jelly making boots for, because making the jelly the normal ways is super messy and unfun." He explained in a word vomit that rushed out of him. Alyxia, meanwhile, noticed something.

    "Er, Kevin? Do you have any other crops?" She asked as she glanced around. "I've noticed some of these trees have fruit as well."

    "Oh yeah, they do." He nodded. "But I only ever eat my PB and J sammiches, since they're all what I need." Now it was Toyo's turn to pipe up.

    "Wait, so those things are all you make to eat?" He asked in a shocked tone.

    "Well, I'm experimenting with making grape and peanut butter flavored jelly products, but it's taking me a while to get those juuuuust right, so they're not ready just yet." Toyo traded a glance with Alyxia, a silent agreement forming between them to try and expand Kevin's diet to a more rounded one later. But for now, they would just let him finish his tour, given how passionate about it he seemed to be. The next thing they knew, they were being taken to something that was odd, even by the standards of the odd world: A small, detailed city scape of some kind, inhabited by small, diminutive figures. "This is Cookie Vale, where the Gingerbread Cookies I accidentally brought to life now live!" Sure enough, as they were brought in closer, Toyo and Alyxia could both clealry see an entire civilization of Gingerbread Men and Gingerbread Women going about their gingerbread lives in their gingerbread homes. One of them looked up, his face of frosting turning into a look of surprise as he pointed up towards Kevin.

    "Look!" He declared, "The Creator has graced us with His presence!" All those who heard the proclomation or otherwise noticed Kevin immediatly fell to their knees in supplication. "All hail Creator Kevin!" Toyo and Alyx both slowly turned to stare at Kevin, seeing a clearly embaressed look was now on his face.

    "They, uh, do that. It tell them not to, but they keep doing it." He admitted shyly. Alyxia and Toyo stared at him for a moment longer before turning their heads towards the Gingerbread people. One of them pointed towards them. "Look! The Creator has brought forth new Great Ones to Grace us with!" They continued to stare as the joyous cheering filled the air. Alyxia's mind was blank as she tried and fail to comprehend the insanity before her. Toyo, meanwhile, was fighting the urge to ask if they tasted any good. Kevin, meanwhile, was blushing at the proclomations of divinity sent his way. Every time with these guys!
  21. Threadmarks: Have Friends, Will Travel, Pt. 4.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    Alyxia stared at the masses of cheering gingerbread people yelling their proclimations of devotion to their newfound gods as said gods stared down at them in either embarrssement, confusion, or in her case in particular, stunned silence. Bards were not the most adept at a wide range of magical talents, being honed in on the power of sound and song, but Alyxia had traveled with her fair share of wizarding companions enough times to recognize what she was seeing before her was something to be given pause.

    Producing life was hard. The natural way, on an evolutionary sense, worked on a geological timescale so massive, it was literally impossible for a Mortal mind to fully grasp the sheer enormity of the amount of time that was involved to go from a bubbling ooze of unliving chemicals, to the complex multicellular life forms that now lived, talked, and fought across Terra in the modern day. The other natural way, involving two compatible beings with the right means to unite their forms to create a third, new entity, still took a matter of months at a time to safely produce a functional, healthy offspring.

    On a magical level, producing life was not something that 'just happens'. The necessary requirements for producing a living creature was grand in both time and resources, and to produce a viable new species capable of self-sustained reproduction was harder still. And yet, somehow, not only had Kevin managed to breath life into gingerbread cookies, not only were they walking, talking, thinking, they had a culture with religion, and going by the gingerbread children, infants, and telltale bumps on some of the gingerbread women, they were somehow capable of reproduction.

    Her head snapped to stare at Kevin, who was still looking more than a little embarressed by the whole worship thing.

    "How?" She asked.

    "Huh?" Kevin blinked and looked at her when she asked her question.

    "How did you do it?" She asked before motioning to the Gingerbread people. "How did you make them?" Kevin let out a sound of understanding before he launched into his explination.

    "Well, I was learning to make cookies with Pappou, and I listened to his instructions and followed them very carefully."

    "His instructions?" Alyxia asked. Kevin nodded.

    "Mhm!" And with that, he began to list off items and their proportions. Butter, half cup. Brown sugar, half cup. Egg, 1. As he continued to list things, it dawned immediatly on Alyxia that Kevin was listing of the actual ingriedients for, well, gingerbread cookies. "And to top it all off, love!" Kevin declared out loud. Alyxia stared at him, which caused him to start to uncomfortably wilt under her gaze. "Did, uh, I say something wrong."

    "No, no, Kevin," Toyo, who had up to that point been stuck in an endless internal debate of if the gingerbread people were delicious and if eating them would be a form of sapient cannibalism, mixed with some potent chiding for even considering the topic, broke out of his stupor as he heard Kevin's concerned tone of voice. "Alyx is just, uh, curious?" He asked, seeing if he got the right word to describe the conversation he had tuned out until just now. Alyxia blinked as she realized she might have overdone it on the staring before nodding.

    "That's right," She stated. "I'm curious as to how you made these, er, Gingerbread people."

    "I just told you how I made them." Kevin said.

    "No no, I mean, how did you bring them to life?" She specified. Kevin made a noise of comprehension.

    "Oh! Well, I poured in too much love when making them." He admitted. "Too many kisses and poof! They came to life!" Once more, Alyxia's mind froze as she tried to process what Kevin just said. Love? Kisses? Were these euphamisms for magic? No, Kevin didn't seem the type to dance around with wordplay, he said things exactly as he meant them. So, somehow, someway, he poured in his actual love into these Gingerbread people, presumably through the medium of kisses, and they had.....sprung to life? It was insane. It was absurd. It was impossible. It was Kevin. Then, a creeping thought slithered its way into her mind.

    "Kevin," Alyxia said slowly. "Are the Gingerbread people the only things you've brought to life?" She asked cautiously. Once again, Kevin looked embarressed.

    "Well, um, not exactly."

    "What else did you do that resulted in-" Toyo motioned to the Gingerbread people, who had not stopped their celebrations even now. "This whole situation?" Kevin gave a shakey smile, looking more like an awkward wince than anything.



    "It is him!" Alyxia and Toyo stared. "It is the Great Uplifter!" Tentacles flopped around in the air as a swarm of octopi surfaced to the water of a massive, ocean like lake within the realm, to waggle their appendages in salute towards Kevin. Regular cepholopods, from octopi to squids to even a few cuttlefish, somehow cheering and behaving with sapiency and thought. Kevin was smiling and waving at his hordes of creations.

    "Were these an accident too?" Alyxia asked.

    "Oh, uh, no, I meant to make them this way." Kevin replied.

    "Alright, but why?" Kevin turned to look at Alyxia with the biggest puppy dog eyes she had seen on him up to that point.

    "Because nature is so mean to octopi! They are so smart in the wild, but they live such short lives and they can't even have babies without dying! It was so sad, I had to help some of them!" Kevin's voice was so earnest, so genuine, that Alyxia instantly believed him when he told her his reason for uplifting an entire swarm of cepholopods. "I would have helped them all, but Pappou sat me down and told me why I couldn't do that...."

    "Kevin," Toyo began, "Buddy, just how many times has something like this happened to you?"

    "Well, there was the time I gave snakes arms, because I was said they couldn't hug anyone." Kevin began, only to be interupted by a noise from Toyo.

    "Wait, that was you that caused the Hug Snakes?" Kevin actually seemed a little proud of that.


    "Kevin, you have a big heart, and it's definitly in the right place-" Alyxia began, "But you can't just uproot the entire natural order on a whim."

    "I know, Pappou sat me down and told me." Kevin sighed. "But I still don't fully get why. I mean, none of my stuff has ever hurt anybody, and it's not like wizards don't regularly do stuff exactly like this but worse all the time."

    "Now Kevin, that's a bit of an exaggeration-"

    "Like the time that mad wizard decided to mash big cats and birds of prey together, and that's how we got Gryphons." Kevin didn't waste any time going into examples. "Or the time another mad wizard did the same thing, but made them sapient, so now we have another bunch of Gryphons but they're people without history or culture of their own. Or the time a mad wizard tried to make an army of golems, and that's how we got a bunch of wild golems that are dangerous." Kevin huffed before looking at Alyxia with confused eyes. "Wizards do stuff like this all the time, but the difference between me and them is that my stuff doesn't become a problem, and I keep it all safe and happy here in my world."

    "What about the Hug Snakes?" Toyo chimed up.

    "Is hugging people a problem?" Kevin asked.

    "Well, uh, technically no, but it is pretty scary when a snake with arms slithers over, hugs your leg, and tells you it loves you." Toyo piped up. "Whatever happened to them anyway? They disappeared a month after they first showed up."

    "I happened to them, I rounded them up and put them in their own special place here in my realm, just like Pappou said I should for their safety." Kevin pouted as he sat down. "I just wanted to help make the world a better place. Is that so bad?" Alyxia felt her face softening a little as she walked over to sit beside the puppy faced young man and pat his back.

    "No, Kevin, wanting to help the world is never bad." She stated soothingly. Toyo moved to sit beside Kevin as well, sitting crosslegged as he scratched his neck.

    "It isn't that what you're doing is bad in the sense that it's hurting people." Toyo explained. "But look at it this way: How many Hug Snakes got gobbled up by another predator because they were too busy trying to hug them rather than defend themselves? How long would these octo-people have lasted before they got into a territory dispute with Merfolk? Do you think the Gingerpeople would be safe when they are literally delicious snacks unto themselves?" Kevin sniffed.

    "Pappou told me the same thing...." He looked up, a sad look in his eyes. "But.....It's unfair."

    "Life is unfair, Kev." Toyo sighed. "Listen, lil' buddy, Alyxia's and your Pappou are right on this one. You're heart is huge, and it's definitly in the right place, but you can't go around helping everything, because it'll cause problems you didn't think about in the first place." A look came over Toyo's face as he considered what to say next. "Have you done anything funny with ants before? Or bees?" Kevin shook his head no. "Well, let's say that you think it's unfair that Bees get their honey stolen so people can eat it-"

    "It is pretty unfair now that you mention it-"

    "Kev, Kev, focus on what I'm getting at, not how I get to it." Toyo uttered. As Kevin settled down to continue listening, Toyo continued. "Say you think it's unfair, and ya give bees the ability to think and feel so they can better defend themselves. At best, they'll force people to pay up for their goods, but what is more likely to happen is that people will just cut their losses and destroy the thinkin' bees and just go looking somewhere else for their honey. And even if the best scenario happens, what happens when a Beowulf comes around to eat their honey. They can't reason with a wild animal, and it's to big and tough for them to sting away, so now not only will they lose their hive, but they'll be aware enough to know what they've lost."

    "I....I didn't think of it that way." Kevin uttered.

    "And even if you do put them here in your realm like the rest, is that fair for the rest of bee kind you won't uplift in the world?" Toyo pressed on. "Sometimes, Kevin, the best of intentions still leads to the worst of outcomes, because there are things beyond your control or realization that can turn a good idea into a disaster. People and critters get hurt you never intended to get hurt."

    "I...I understand." The young man uttered after a long moment's thought. "I stopped doing it before because Pappou said not to, but.....not I get why I shouldn't."

    "Your Pappou sounds like he is a wise man, Kevin, there's a reason why you should listen to him when he talks about things such as this." Alyxia stated as she rubbed his back. Kevin sniffed before nodding.

    "Yeah...Yeah, you guys are right." He smiled as he stood up. "I know you and my family would get along great if you got the chance to meet one another."

    "That's high praise, I think." Alyxia spoke to Toyo, who chuckled.

    "Yup." The Goblin male said as he stood up himself. He looked to the Octopi, who were watching everying unfold with watchful eyes. He waved at them. "Hi, all. I'm Toyo, nice to meet'cha."

    "Hail, Toyo the Wise!" The lead Octopus shouted, causing a wave of shaking tentacles in salute. Toyo just chuckled at the display while Kevin and Alyxia looked on.

    "So, I believe you were still giving us a tour?" Alyxia uttered to Kevin.

    "Oh, that's right!" He stated. Smiling as if nothing had dampened his mood before, Kevin floated up and waved his friends to follow him. "Let me show you the training grounds, and then we can start the day's walk for work!" Waving goodbye to his cepholopods, Kevin zoomed in front of them as Alyxia stood up and joined Toyo in following him.

    "Wise and mature one day, pouty and childish the next." Alyxia whispered to Toyo. "I think we've got our hands full."

    "He's a kid." Toyo shrugged. "They're smarter than they look, but they still need someone around to guide them the right way." Alyxia nodded, before a frown came over her face.

    "He's been raised well, but with so much power and ability at his disposal..." She trailed off, and was pleased when Toyo picked up on her meaning.

    "Someone has to keep an eye on the little guy." Toyo then gave her a smile. "Luckily, he's got two someones." Alyxia nodded, a smile of her own coming over her face in turn. They had their work cut out for them, but for Kevin's sake, they'd give it their all to help him in the coming weeks and months of their journy together.
  22. Threadmarks: Have Friends, Will Travel, Pt. 5.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    Alyxia wasn’t completely sure what Kevin had meant when he said he had training to do, but despite her expectations for something flashy and Kevin-y, she found herself surprised by how…..simple it all was. Constructing and reinforcing practice dummies of various materials, he began to practice a flurry of kicks, punches, and a handful of combat abilities including localized gravitic manipulation, telekinesis, and elemental attacks.

    Honestly, it was all extremely mundane compared to Kevin’s displayed abilities, but there was one thing in particular she noticed: his speed. As befitting his level of power on the Hero scale, Kevin was fast. Fast enough that there were points that Alyxia was struggling to keep up, and she has been adventuring for years by that point.

    If she was having trouble keeping up, then poor Toyo, having had no time or chance to increase his level of power as Adventurers and Heroes did, found himself constantly blinking and missing entire moves as Kevin performed his practice.

    “This is, uh….” The Goblin male was grasping to find a good term to describe his thoughts.

    “Overwhelming?” Alyxia asked.

    “It’s a lot, yeah.” Toyo nodded. Suddenly, a chuckle escaped him. “Silver lining, we won’t hav to worry about trouble finding us now and it bein’ a problem.” He said with a genuine smile. It was infectious enough to get Alyxia to smile right back as she adjusted her spectacles.

    “You know, I could help you unlock your potential.” She said.

    “Wait, for real?” Toyo asked, a look of surprise on his face. “You’re not pulling my leg, are ya?”

    “Oh no, I’m quite serious.” Alyxia nodded. “There are many ways, many paths to unlocking and growing ones Power. It’s how no two hero develops and grows the same way.” She looked him over. “You’re a trader, yes? A wandering one?”

    “That I am, aye.”

    “Even something as simple as trading and wandering can act as keys and methods to unlocking and growing one’s Power.” Alyxia stated.

    “Now you have to be joking.” Toyo said, a disbelieving look in his eye as he looked at her critically for a tell in the supposed ruse.

    “It’s true.” She said as she took out her guitar and started to adjust it. “A Bard such as myself? We unlock and grow our Power through the playing and honing of musical skills.” With that, she plucked a few chords in practice before launching into a a melody of strumming, a wordless folk song from her home town filling the air. As she played, whispers and strings of mystic power flowed off of her, coalescing as ghostly pieces of armor over her and Toyo. She smiled as she stopped playing and, while the apparitions faintly dimmed, they did not go away.

    “Whoa.” Toyo whispered in astonishment as he felt the Sound Armor, feeling the harmonies locked within the sound made solid as they reverberated through him. He could feel as much as he heard the Melodie’s now protecting him.

    “First spell all us Bards learn.” Alyxia declared with a smile.

    “This is amazing, Alyx!” Toyo giddily uttered, his world traveled experience briefly melting away into child like wonder as he got to experience what he’d only heard of in stories.

    “The real silver lining is that I’ve gained an ear to be able to play just about any song I hear.”

    “Whoa, for real?” Toyo and Alyxia both were spooked by the third voice to join their conversation. It would seem that while they had gotten caught up with their talking, Kevin had drifted in in a pause from his practice session.

    “Oh, hey Kev.” Toyo welcomed him.

    “Hi, To!” Was Kevin’s response, earning him a warm chuckle from Toyo. Kevin then looked to Alyxia, eyes wide and smile giddy. “You can play any song you hear?” He asked her. Alyxia smiled as she adjusted her spectacles once again.

    “Ah, well, yes! It’s a shared gift us Bards gain access to as part of our sound and music based Power.” She explained. “Though, it also disqualifies us from entering musical contests, so there is also that.” She said. Her tone was light but she wasn’t joking: but of a sore spot in the Bard’s Guild, that little factoid.

    Kevin nodded as he fished out a strange device of unknown make, like some sort of fat, flattened wand that was thicker at the top end given the way it was held. Kevin closed his eyes as if to focus….and then, miraculously, music began to play. It was unlike anything Alyxia had ever heard, with chiming instruments she’d never heard and lyrics that matched no song she knew of. A glance between the odd device and Kevin’s grinning, expecting face made her realize what he was asking for. With a smile right back, Alyxia retuned her guitar before launching into the song as she was listening to it for the first time.

    The acoustic, real time cover seemed to make Kevin extremely happy, going by the way he was swaying himself in the air, eyes closed, to the tune as the she dog played. Toyo listened intently as well, his ears picking up and comparing the acoustic version with the original as they played side by side. Alyxia hadn't been lying, she really could play by ear and play it well.

    "Oh, oh, try this one!" Kevin cheered as he used his device to summon forth a new song, this one by the same singer. It seemed to be about the singer's relation to a woman and how she wasn't his lover. Alyxia listened to the music play for a bit before starting from the beginning, sturmming the guitar to the beat with an expert hand that belied the fact she'd never heard the song before in her life.

    "Oh, this is fantastic!" Kevin cheered, zipping up into the air and pumping his fists upwards. "You're amazing, Alyx!" Kevin declared as he hovered back down to the ground, eyes wide and glistening with wonder. "I wish I could play an instrument."

    "If you want, I could teach you how to play guitar." Alyxia offered with a smile. "It wouldn't be any trouble at all. We could even add it as part of your training, if you want." Kevin gasped, eyes wide as he realized the opportunity being offered before him.

    "You'd do that? For lil' ol' me?" Kevin asked bashfully, rubbing his paw like foot into the dirt.

    "Absolutely." Alyxia nodded. "Consider it repayment for saving my town." She declared.

    "I know how to play this ol' thing." Toyo took out what seemed to be a small, rectangular instrument. A harmonica. "Picked it up in one of the big cities and I've gotten pretty good at it, if I do say so myself. I could teach it to you too, when Alyx here ain't teaching you the guitar. What'ya say?" Instead of a verbal answer, Toyo found himself suddenly embraced in a bone-crushing hug as Kevin couldn't help but show his thanks through the power of physical affection. "I'll take that as a yes!" Toyo managed to breath out. Realizing how hard he was hugging the Goblin, Kevin suddenly let go and zoomed a fair distance away, a self-concious look over his features. He looked embarressed and, if Alyxia didn't know any better, ashamed by the amount of force he'd put into that.

    "Sorry!" Kevin yelped out, but Toyo just waved him off.

    "Forget about it, that was nothin'." The Goblin said with a friendly smile. "Got a lot of force for a little guy, but given it's you, that ain't surprising." He paused as he realized this seemed to make Kevin even more self-concious, and his mind quickly went into overdrive to look for a solution. If Kevin was anything like his younger siblings, traditional comforting wouldn't help much. "Hey, Kev," Toyo spoke up, deciding to go the side-stepping route this time. "How's about you finish up your training session here, and we can go start up the job selling Llamas. That's your job, ain't it?" This seemed to brighten up Kevin a little, though it was clear he wasn't completely free of his shaken expression.

    "Y-yeah!" He said out loud. "Yeah. I just got a few more moves to do, and then we can get the day started proper." Toyo smiled and gave him a thumbs up in response, leaving Kevin to zoom off to finish off his practicing with the dummies he'd made.

    "You alright?" Alyxia asked as she moved closer to Toyo, a look of concern on her face.

    "I'm fine, just winded is all." Toyo said as he cracked his back. His Sound Armor had noticeably become visibly cracked in several places. "That kid's got a hug to snap a tree in half, easily." Alyxia nodded as she played a tune on her guitar, whisps of musical energy extending outward. Toyo took a deep breath as the Healing Note spell allowed him to breath a little easier. "Thanks Alyx, that-" A sudden and violently viscious cracking sound echoed through the meadow where the trainined was taking place. Toyo and Alyxia both snapped their heads to stare in Kevin's direction to see what hat happened. Kevin was looming over one of the dummies, which unlike the rest he had simply beaten into 'submission', was now with a large, violent hole in its chest cavity, a chunk of wood where the heart would be torn out. "......Uh....Well then. That's.....Concerning."
  23. Threadmarks: Have Friends, Will Travel, Pt. 6.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    The rest of the morning routine that followed passed by without much fanfare. Soon, the trio found themselves back on regular Terra once again, and with a smile on his face and a seeming innate knowledge of where he was going next, Kevin began to march to the West, following the main road out of Cotcher's Town to wherever the path took him to continue his never ending mission to sell Llama's and Llama adjacant life forms. For their part, Alyxia and Toyo found themselves spending the time chatting about nothing particularly important. Mostly it was trading gripes about some of their worst misadventures in their time wandering the lands.

    "-And that's how I escaped with my life from a pack of cannibalistic garden Gnomes." Toyo declared as he shuddered, finishing off his tale of a particularly eventful sale gone array as Alyxia listened intently.

    "Goodness, did the Wizard really take your offer that badly? To animate procelain garden decoration to eat you alive?"

    "Honestly, I think I got off lucky since I managed to get away." Toyo shrugged. "I saw a cow he had on the front lawn with a name tag on the collar named 'Dave', and I'm pretty sure I would have ended up turned into a sheep or something if he wasn't so mad he went with the Gnome thing."

    "Wizards are rather petty like that." Alyxia admitted.

    "You ever have any trouble with them before?" Toyo asked.

    "I was an Adventurer, so yes, many times. The worst was probably the one that had gone completely insane and was trying to turn an entire village into his own personal musical number. Have you ever tried to fight while you're doing a musical number? If it wasn't for my own skill with music magic, we would still be tap dancing to this day." The mental image earned a little laugh from Toyo. Glancing over at Kevin, who was leading up the front, Toyo noticed the bubbly little fellow was in his own little world as he hummed and skipped along the road.

    "It's a good thing Kev isn't like most Wizards, huh?" Toyo uttered. Alyxia reflexivly nodded her head in agreement.

    "He has such a gentle soul for such a powerful being." She agreed. "Though, the final attack he did on those practice dummies was rather....jarring."

    "Oh, definitly, but I wouldn't worry too much about it, at least not yet." Toyo said waving it off. Alyxia looked at him curiously.

    "What makes you say that?"

    "You mean aside from the kid being sweeter than sugar and softer than silk? The fact that he looked realy upset when he did that." Toyo declared. "He doesn't have it in his heart to be a killer.....well, at least not when he can avoid it." The Goblin uttered. "I'd imagine if he's willing to train with it at all, there would be something that would cause him to do the deed, but it'd have to be something really, really bad and unforgivable. But I'm just throwing guesses, and I don't think it'd be polite or wanted to straight up ask him." Toyo paused as he considered the thought. "Assuming he even knows what his limits for kindness even are."

    "You are quite perspective about people and him in particular, I'm noticing." Alyxia stated. Another shrug came from Toyo.

    "I grew up in a big house hold, middle child of a bunch of brothers, sisters, cousins. I grew up in a family of traders, and have been a part of the family buisness for about ten years now. Understanding people and learning to read them is just something you pick up and learn quick."

    "Though not perfectly." Alyxia uttered with a teasing grin. "Otherwise you wouldn't have angered that Wizard so much."

    "One, he was a Wizard. Those guys aren't all right in the head, you know that." Toyo scoffed defensively. "And two, how was I supposed to know he'd go berserk over me trying to sell him a whisking set? Not my fault the maniac was convinced I was trying to sell him 'faulty metal wands' instead of kitchen appliances." A giggle from the dog woman was all he earned.

    "Well, Kevin is a seller himself. How's about we step back and see how he does his buisness?"


    "Hello, sir, would you like a Llama?"

    "What's that?"

    "I asked if you wish to have a Llama, sir."

    "No no, I mean, what is a Llama? I've never heard of it? Is it some kind of newfangled auto-mechanical form the cities?"

    "Oh, no sir, a Llama is a cameloid animal that lacks a hump, has soft wool, and produces delicious milk. Here, a display animal to show you!"

    "I see, I see....What's a cameloid?"

    ".....It's like a Choco, but a four legged mammal with a hump of fat on its back to help it survive in deserts."

    "Why would I need something that lives in a desert, we're in a temparate climate."

    "Oh, no, I'm selling you a Llama, not a Camel."

    "But you said it was one of those."

    "No sir, I said it is a cameloid, as in its in the same family."

    "So it's the same thing."



    "Hello, ma'am, would you like a Llama?"

    "Is that supposed to be a pick up line?"

    "What? No, ma'am, I'm quite literal in my asking. I even have one right here ready for purchase."

    "Trying to give me a cute, fuzzy animal, yeah this is definitly some kinda pick up line."

    "No ma'am, I assure you, I am strictly proffesional in my buisness."

    "Then why the cute, fuzzy animal if you don't want to give it to me?"

    "I'm not trying to give you a gift, I'm trying to sell it to you."

    ".....You sure that isn't some weird pick up line?"

    "Ma'am, how is that possibly a pick up line?"

    "You tell me, you're using it."


    "Greetings, sir! Would you like-"

    "I will take twenty."

    "What? But I haven't even given you my pitch-"

    "Thirty five."


    "Five hundred, final offer."


    "I am so sorry about my brother, he got fired from his job recently as a stock broker and he still hasn't recovered from his breakdown."

    "15! Sell at 15!"

    "Oh my."


    Alyxia and Toyo didn't look at one another, simply staring at the latest in a long line of oddballs they had seen Kevin encounter that day. Toyo glanced at his wrist mounted chrono and Alyxia glanced at it with him. 2:45 PM. Kevin had told him he didn't stop working until 10 at night. This was going to be a long, long day.
  24. Threadmarks: Have Friends, Will Travel, End.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
    Likes Received:
    “Sir, I understand your concerns, but I can assure you that a Llama is a highly efficient animal for all of your needs.”

    “What about meat?”

    “I’m afraid that isn’t an option with these animals, but I can assure you their dairy is more than sufficient for all of your food and food adjacent needs!”

    “I’m lactose intolerant.”

    “What? Why are you intolerant of lactose? What has it ever done to you? Bigotry has no place in this world, even towards animal byproducts used in consumption.”

    “What are you-no, I mean I can’t have milk or stuff made of milk. I get stomach aches and can’t sleep at night.”

    “Oh! I see. Well, you could always sell the milk for money, and the wool is very high quality.”

    “That….is fair. How much for two?”

    “For you? 10 silver for both!”

    Toyo said nothing as he watched Kevin’s current deal unfold, though he did scratch his neck at the price. In the last few days they had been traveling together, he had come to see that Kevin, oddball as he was, had a way of selling his Llamas thanks to a magnetic persona and a can do attitude that never dampened no matter the attitude he got from his customers. It was inspiring to see for the older merchant, and he hoped that Kevin would never lose that energy and kindness.

    That all being said, if he had one criticism of the younger fellow, it was that his prices were inordinately low. Giving the customer a good and fair deal was admirable and something Toyo could approve of, but ten silver for two extremely high quality Llama such as those Kevin sold? He trusted and respected Kevin enough to let him run his business his own way, and he was not about to butt in to say anything while said business was being conducted….but he decided he would at least ask about the whole thing after it was over.

    As the sale was completed, Kevin and his friends left with ten silver pieces more than they started out with, and two llamas less. The price of the llama seller trade. As the trio walked on their way down the road to the next destination, they were in high spirits: Alyxia hummed as she strummed the chords of her guitar to the tune of a song she heard Kevin’s musical device playing the other day. Kevin hummed along with her, and the harmony between the two was inviting Toyo to join in, an invitation he felt all too eager to join in on, but he resisted the urge in favor of satiating his curiosity.

    “Hey Kev.” Toyo said.

    “Yeah, To?” That got a bemused snort out of the Goblin.

    “To?” He asked.

    “Yeah, you know, short for ‘Toyo’ like how you shorten my name to Kev instead of Kevin.” That got a chuckle out of Toyo. Fair.

    “Right. So, I gotta ask: why are your prices so low?” Kevin stopped in his tracks, causing his friends to pause as well. Kevin looked to Toyo with a confused look on his face and his head cocked to the side.

    “Watcha mean?” He asked.

    “From a mercantile perspective, you short change yourself constantly. For the quality of the Llamas you sell, you ask for only a fraction of the price. I’m curious as to why?”

    “Oh!” Kevin said, understanding. “That’s easy: I sell Llamas ti help people.”

    “I understand that, and respect you for it, but isn’t the boss of the company you work for going to get mad?”

    “Nah, Mr Dalei said I could make my own prices.” Kevin said like that explained everything. Toyo opened his mouth to say something before saying one word.

    “Okay.” He said without argument. Alyxia gave him a thumbs up. The two had agreed: helping Kevin and keeping him on the right path was the priority, first and foremost. Personally, Toyo was glad for the simplicity of Kevin’s answers. They gave him an out from asking deeper and going mad trying to comprehend the little guy. With a smile, Kevin turned around and the journey continued. Kevin and Alyxia resumed their humming, and Toyo once again was tempted to join them. However, something else caught his mind that he felt the need to resolve.

    “…..So. To?”


    “Not even like Toto? Or Yo-yo?”

    “Silly To, the point is to shorten the name!” Again, Toyo had to chuckle. Again, fair.

    “Yeah, but ‘To’ makes it sound like you’re talking to part of a big foot.”

    “That’s good, it means you are a giant bean!”

    “Bean?” Toyo asked.

    “Bean.” Kevin nodded. Toyo glanced at Alyxia for help. She responded by non chalsbtly showing him her palm, revealing paw padding on the palm and finger tips.

    “He means paw pads.” Alyxia chuckled.

    “Ah, gotcha.” The Goblin male nodded. “Yeah, if I was a big toe, I wouldn’t have beans. No pads.”

    “What?!” Kevin stopped again, whipping around to look at Toyo in shock. “How can you not have beans? You don’t have hooves or hoof adjacent thingies!”

    “Not every species has paw pads, Kevin.” Alyxia calmly explained. Toyo supported this by raising his hands, facing the palms to Kevin so he could see that, indeed, he had no beans, just the calloused hands of a hard worker and traveler.

    “No beans.” Toyo confirmed. Kevin was shocked. Aghast. Very upset, even.

    “No! That’s awful!” Kevin declared in horror.

    “That’s life, Kev.” Toyo shrugged.

    “Then life is wrong!” Kevin huffed. “Don’t worry, I can fix it!”

    “Fix it?” Was all Toyo could manage to say before Kevin began to float, his eyes glowed their golden light, and the angel-song flowed. In less of a dramatic flash and more of an anticlimactic ‘pop’, Toyo I strangely felt something different with his extremities. A look at his hands revealed his palms and finger tips now adorned with paw pads, and by the pressure in his shoes, the same had happened with his feet.

    “There, I fixed it!”

    “Kevin, what did you do?!” An appalled and uncharacteristically loud Alyxia shouted. The look of anger on her face was as foreign as the alien tone of reprimand was in her voice, both of which caused Kevin to flinch at the unfamiliar look on his friend.


    “You. Do not. Change people. Without. Their. Consent.” Alyxia scolded harshly, finger jabbing accusingly towards the young man. “Fix Toyo right now!”

    “Now hold on a sec on that.” Toyo interrupted. His friends looked to him to find him inspecting his hands post beaning. “Alyxia is right, Kevin, you just don’t do that to people without their go ahead. That said, now that it’s happened, I think I’ll keep these a bit, see what it’s like to have them.” Alyxia relaxed a bit at those words, but didn’t fully let go as she looked Kevin in the eye.

    “Kevin, you have to promise us you won’t do that again.” Kevin’s wide eyes hardened into something new now. A steely determination she hadn’t seen since the day of the comet when they first met.

    “One better.” He declared as he extended his hand out and had his pinkie finger out. “Pinkie Swear. An unbreakable oath.” Alyxia blinked before a small but genuine smile came over her face. She wrapped her pinkie around his. The two pulled the fingers taught and shook once. The covenant was sealed.

    “Alright then.” Alyxia stated, gently now. “I’ll hold you to that.” Kevin nodded before glancing at Toyo, who gave him a thumbs up, wiggling it with a smile to show off his new bean. Kevin gave him a small smile to his other friend, nodded to him too, before taking his lead back at the front of their procession.

    As they walked together chatting to one another regarding his new acquisitions, Toyo and Alyxia were blissfully unaware of the furrowed brow on Kevin’s face as a look of regret and more than a little distress lay on his face. He’d done it again. The consequences weren’t as severe as last time, but he’s done something to a fellow thinking, feeling being without thinking again. And this time, he’d done it consciously. It couldn’t happen again. But he knew in his bones, some day, it would. He would act without thinking, whether consciously or unconsciously.

    But he wouldn’t be alone, he realized. Glancing back at his new friends, he caught sight of them in time to see them laughing together, he felt something. That it would be alright, because he had his friends with him. A smile of his own formed over his face as he realized his blessings. He would mess up again. But he wouldn’t be alone, and his friends would help put him back on the right track, like Pappou and Cousin before them.

    A skip returned to his step as Kevin felt that knowledge of mistakes to come being counterbalanced by knowledge that his friends would help pick him up again.

    They’d be together, and together, they’d be alright.
  25. walket11

    walket11 Not too sore, are you?

    Apr 22, 2020
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    This is so wholesome and fantastic. Well done!
    dogbertcarroll and TripleMRed like this.
  26. SkinnyP

    SkinnyP In need of a hug

    Sep 8, 2021
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    This has to be the most wholesome thing I have ever read. Kevin is the most adorable being in all of fiction, change my mind.
  27. Extras: The Letter.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
    Likes Received:
    Of the many bountiful lands of Terra, few were quite as captivating as the Mountains of Pink Rose Trees. A land of hills and mountains, some of them floating land-masses in the air, interconnected by massive vines and roots of equally massive pink leafed trees that dominated the landscape. In a world of adventure and turmoil, this place was among the few that could truly claim to be free of the usual chaos that enveloped much of the rest of the world. It was for this reason, as well as the generally harmonious and beautiful aesthetic, that this was the place of choice for many Heroes to retire, or to come and meditate in silent contemplation.

    For one Brew Master Han, however, he just liked to use the place as a napping place to avoid being disturbed. The wizened old Wukong was massive for his species size, though whether it was because of ancestory, ascension in the rungs of Power, or some other third thing was a hotly debated topic in the Brew Master Guild he belonged to. As the pink leaves drifted down, painting the orange-purple streaked evening sky with a rain of rosamel petals, the old warrior relaxed on his back, legs crossed and arms behind his head as he lay against the root of a particularly old and venerable speciman of the hulking trees that dotted the land.

    He had done this routine a thousand times in his life so far, and he planned to do this a thousand times more. So used to this simple, relaxing cycle in his life, that as his fellow Brew Master's learned, absolutely nothing could pry him from his beloved relaxation spot.

    Well, almost nothing.

    As he lay there, he sensed a disturbance in.....well, 'everything' was technically accurate, but it was less that something was there, and more that nothing was. In a spot not far from his prefered resting site, something stirred, unseen but not unfelt. A void began to split apart the air, something he was all to familiar with as the distinct sensation of Emptiness filled his senses. An empty Nothing, that grew and grew in its power. What would have alarmed anyone else didn't even cause Han to flinch, much less open an eye. He was all too familiar with this brand of Aetherworks for its usage to disturb him in any way.

    Exactly 7 seconds after the Emptiness began to grow, just as suddenly it disappeared, the Void popping with an audible hiss as where there was once Nothing, there was now something. A letter, inacuous in its appearence, mundane in its form, and now fluttering towards him as though the very wind itself was its courier. Han neither moved nor stirred an eye as he calmly waited for the letter to find its destination, resting on his belly. It lay there for a while as he staunchly refused to acknowledge it, much less try and open it. Once again, the wind picked it up and it fluttered up to land on Han's straw hat, percariously perched on the tip but never falling off as if it was trying to catch his attention. Again, he did nothing, though by now not even he could help hide the amused smirk on his lips.

    As if with a mind of its own, the letter fell and landed directly on his nose, before the wind spun it and the edge of the closed letter hit him directly in the eye lid. As a Brew Master at his level of Power, such a thing didn't even begin to hurt him, much less draw his attention. The letter stopped spinning and hitting him in the eyelid, almost as if it was contemplating its next course of action. For a long, drawn out moment, nothing seemed to happen. And then, the hollowing feeling of the Nothing returned, this time a sharp, instant increase in its presence in the span of a split second. Almost an instant later, a bolt of lightning came down from the clear sky, split off a particularly large branch from the lower rungs of the tree, and the tree limb subsequently fell unceremoniously directly on Han's head.

    The bark split as it landed on him, as though hitting something harder than itself, but it didn't need to hurt him physically, for it had wounded him in a far worse way.

    The Wukong's straw hat, lacking reinforcement charms and strength of its own, was torn asunder by the falling branch as it impacted it. This finally caused Han to rouse, his eyes now open in an annoyed, lidded stare as he glared down at the letter still perched on his nose.

    "Really?" He asked it as if it could answer. It replied by slamming its edge into his now open eye, once again not causing him to flinch but it did cause him to sigh. "Alright, alright. My nap's ruined now, so let's see what you have to say." He grumbled as he picked up the letter, tore it open with a claw, before pulling out the paper within and giving it a read.

    For all the trouble it had given him to be read, the actual message was surprisingly brisque and to the point:


    Something has come up and I will be held up longer than expected. I'm calling in my favor. You know the one.


    Raising a brow, Han stood up and stretched out the kinks in his back before looking the letter once over, finding no other messages, hidden or otherwise, on it, before nodding.

    "Right then, a favor's a favor." He murmured to himself as he crumpled up the paper, took a swig of one of his Brew bottles, before tossing the message up into the air and spitting forth a burning mixture that engulfed the page and the packaging it came in. So hot was the fire that the message and its letter were instantly reduced to ash and cinders, now wafting away on the wind and joining the endless cavalcade of petals that flowed through the land. Putting away his bottle and clapping his hands together, a small, fluffy looking cloud appeared before him, coming when called like a faithful companion animal. Taking his seat upon it, he gave his cloud a loving pat and a smile. "Come now, old friend. We have a little pup to train!" With that, the flying cloud buckled forth like a mighty steed.....before jetting out at a speed comparable to a bird rather than an extremely fast mode of transportation. The price of having such an old cloud, but he didn't mind. While he could reach his destination faster on his own, the slower journey would give him time to plan his regimen.

    This wasn't his idea of relaxation, but damned if he wasn't going to give it his all!
  28. Threadmarks: Cup Noodles, Pt. 1.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
    Likes Received:
    "Come now, little one, say 'Apple.'" Gamil stood by as he watched his uncle showing the fruit in question to the tiny creature they were looking after. The tiny, puppy like baby 'ooh'd and 'ah'd at the sight of the fruit, taken in by his own reflection in its shiny skin. He reached out with a tiny hand for it, but uncle Guyial retracted his hand before it could touch the apple. "Now now, you can have it when you say 'apple'. I know you can do it."

    "It clearly doesn't understand, uncle." Gamil declared. Gamil's words seemed to attract the babies attention and it almost looked hurt.

    "Clearly he can, nephew." Guyial sighed. "Why must you insist on being so distant? Is it really that hard to open your heart when you already agree to live under the same roof as him?"

    "Growing attached is the last thing we should be doing with it." Gamil scoffed. "Honestly, what is your plan here?"

    "Connections are what will save us all, nephew." Guyial cryptically uttered as he turned his attention to the baby. "Come now, little one, let's focus on the apple and not your mean cousin."

    "'Cousin'? Really, uncle?"

    "Yes, nephew."

    "So what, is it your child now?" That got a chuckle out of the older Oberon.

    "I think of it more like being a grandfather. Certainly fits my age more." The baby looked between him and his uncle before settling on him. Gamil rolled his eyes. "Don't look at me for attention." He declared before pointing directly at his uncle. "Get your 'grandfather' to give you your fruit." The tiny baby blinked before looking directly at his uncle.

    "Pappou." Gamil nearly choked on his own tongue in surprise as Guyial looked at the infant with wide, surprised eyes.

    "Did you hear that, nephew?" Guyial uttered in amazement. "He called me 'grandfather'!"

    "I-it's just refering to the apple." Gamil insisted, motioning his hand around as if to wave away what his grandfather had said as though it was the unwanted spray of the sea itself. "It wasn't refering to you!"

    As if understanding Gamil, the tiny baby took its tiny baby hand out of its tiny baby cloak and pressed its fingers against Guyials own.

    "Pappou." He declared again, with as much confident as such a tiny infant could muster. As Gamil stared slack jawed, Guyials surprise melted to genuine grandfatherly affection as he reached out with his free hand to gently pat his younger ward's head.

    "Thank you, little one." He uttered sincerely. The tiny infant made leased noises, clapped his hands, and then reached out in a beckoning motion for the apple. That earned a laugh from Guyial.

    "Oh no you don't, you little sneak. You're not getting this until you call it what it is!" Guyial smiled as he showed the apple again. "'Apple'." He motioned his free hand towards the infant. Rather than pout, the baby clapped his hands as he repeated the fruit's name.

    "Milo!" He declared as loud as his tiny lungs could muster. Gamil groaned as he realized he had been proven wrong, while Guyial laughed in joy as he rubbed the baby's head and gave him the apple, which he began to nibble on with his already developing teeth.

    "Good work, Caoimhin!" He said smiling before picking up the baby as he nibbled on his meal. "Come, let's go for a walk, and when we get back we'll get you some more of that Llama milk you like so much." The baby giggled. Seeing Pappou so happy with him made him happy!


    Alyxia hummed to herself as she cooked her morning meal of oatmeal while Toyo nibbled on a sandwhich he made from stored ingriedients and Kevin munched on his usual fair of peanut butter and jelly sandwhiches with llama milk.....Actually, now that she stopped and thought about it, she couldn't think of a time that Kevin hadn't eaten anything other than his PB&J sandwhiches. She heard him mention he had been working on some yogurt, but he'd messed up and the batch he was making went bad in a non-edible way and had to be thrown out. But even so, Yogurt and PB and J sandwhiches? Every day, all meals of the day? It didn't sit right with her.

    "Something on your mind, Alyx?" Toyo piped up. Alyxia looked up to see him looking at her as he kept feeling up his meal to see what it felt like with his newly acquired pads. It had been a week since he'd gotten them and he still didn't stop testing everything they encountered to see how they felt with the pads. It was adorable.

    "Huh?" Alyxia looked to Toyo with the face of someone who wasn’t quite sure how to answer the question presented to them. Toyo just smiled at her response.

    “Yeah, something’s on your mind.” He took a bite of his meal before swallowing it in one gulp before nodding to her. “I’m all ears if you need to talk.” The male Goblin uttered.

    “Oh, it’s probably nothing.”

    “If you’ve got something on your mind, it’s alright to share.” Even the individual of her concerns was piping up on the matter of her letting out her thoughts.

    “I’m just concerned about your diet.” Alyxia uttered slowly. When Kevin didn’t immediately reply, she took it as her opportunity to continue. “Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwhiches every day doesn’t seem very healthy.” She elaborated.

    “Ah.” Kevin uttered. “Probably, yeah.” Alyxia blinked. Even Toyo looked stumped. Neither had expected Kevin to flat out agree with her.

    “So, you’ll change your diet?” Alyxia asked cautiously, testing the waters.

    “Nah.” Now Alyxia was very confused.

    “But you just agreed it’s unhealthy.” She pointed out.


    “But you won’t change it?”

    “Nope!” Toyo chuckled.

    “Any particular reason, bud?” The Goblin asked.

    “I need the sugar to fuel my titanic power.” Kevin bluntly stated. Alyxia and Toyo both shared a look.

    “I….see.” Alyxia said, not seeing. It was then that Toyo got an idea.

    “I noticed a lot of your practicing on the dummies is physical attacks.” Toyo pointed out. Kevin turned to look at him with a stare beckoning him to continue. “Well, wouldn’t it make sense that you ate stuff to help you build muscle too? To help?” Toyo explained slowly before looking to Alyxia for support.

    “Yes!” The female canine perked up. “Sugar to fuel your magic, calcium rich milk to strengthen your bones, but you need things to boost your muscles too, no?” Kevin seemed to give this some thought.

    “That makes sense…..but I don’t want to build muscle, all of the proteins necessary is in meat, and I don’t eat that.” Figures.

    “Well, there are alternatives.” But Toyo came in with the save. Kevin’s state turned to a narrow eyed glare and his cheeks puffed out incredulously.

    “What’chu talkin’ ‘bout, ‘Yo?” Toyo smiled as he got his chance to shine.

    “Over my many travels, I have managed to find many meatless alternatives to gaining the necessary nutrients and proteins needed to live a healthy lifestyle and grow strong. We can look through what I have and see if anything stands out for you that you will like!” Silence drew between them, stretching across one second, then two, then three. Then, with a dramatic gasp and a leap into the air clicking his heels together, Kevin giddily floated down in front of Toyo.

    “That’s a great idea, Toyo!” Kevin declared eagerly. “When do we start?” Alyxia smiled as Toyo slyly gave her a thumbs up behind his back.

    “We start….uh, we’ll, we’re having breakfast right now, so how’s about lunch time?”

    “Then the time of lunch will be the hour of our great journey!” Kevin declared giddily. This was going to be an interesting day.
  29. Threadmarks: Cup Noodles, Pt.2.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
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    The Sulking Selkie wasn’t a very pretty tavern. The wood construction was old and chipped, the paint had long since faded away, the sign hung limply from its chains, and buisness had slowed down to a crawl the last few decades. Still, the drinks it served were good and what food they offered was hearty and filling. As such, it found itself with a steady, loyal set of clientele. Said clientele were all bandits, highwaymen, and other nier-do-wells, but hey, what can you do in these hard times.

    “I’m tellin’ ya, Rupert-“ A hulking shark like bandit in the curious garb of a pirate captain began to complain as he sat at the bar, only to be interrupted.

    “Robert.” The bar owner, a tall, well built dog man with an impressive mustache, corrected as he cleaned the same glass for the twelfth time in order to look busy. “Name’s ‘Robert.’”

    “Well I pays for the drinks, so that means ya’s Rupert now!” Growled the bandit captain. Robert, who was now Rupert, just calmly raised a hand in a defeated manner, which satisfied the Bandit to continue.

    “Where’s was I? Ah, right. I’m tellin’ ya, Rupert, folks these days hav’ no respect for a muggin’ at a highway robbery these days, Tis’ always a ‘hero this’ or a ‘you’ll get yours’ that. What ever happened ta cowerin’ in fear and Hanson’ over the goods all quite like?”

    “I was wondering where you get your payments for your tabs.” Rupert, who was formerly Robert, dryly uttered as he raised what could only have been the gem etched ring of some merchant who had run afoul with this sorry lot. The comment earned a small chorus of snorting chuckles from the crew around the bar. Their captain waved them off to shut them up, which they did.

    “An the worst of it is,” the Captain continued, “Those so called ‘heroes’ never even show up to the ruckus! Off galavantin’ an savin’ the world from who eats it’s of the week, no time for savin’ Trader Chuck from gettin’ his valuables nabbed no more.” The massive shark’s lip curled and he shook his head in actual disgust.

    “I’m surprised, I thought the job getting easier around these parts would be what you want.” The Bartender of various names uttered, only mildly surprised by the Captain’s temperament on the subject matter.

    “It’s the principle o’ de ting.” The Captain explained. His crew groaned. Here he went off again. “I know what I am, who I am. I’m yeh bad guy in all the stories, an’ proud of it! But what’s a villain witout a hero? A freebie is hollow, a real bandit needs a challenge, someone ya fight off over the loot, ta earn ‘is keep. But wit all the heroes away doin’ ‘more important’ things….’ His crew rolled their eyes but even they were nodding in agreement as he spoke. “Wat a fine mess teh world is, eh Richie?” The man formerly known as Rupert blinked.

    “I thought you said I was Rupert.” Richie did not ask, he stated it.

    “Yur Richie now.” The Captain uttered with a wry grin, causing his crew to break out in cheers and laughs from his crew and a roll of the eyes from the Bartender.

    Before their routine could continue, the door to the tavern flung open with excessive force, causing the nearest bandits to it to jump at the sudden movement and crashing of it slamming against the wall it was hinges to.

    “Arright, wats, dis.” The Captain grumbled as he turned to look at who had dared to interrupt the good times within his favorite tavern.

    Standing there, standing too straight backed to be a ruffian, too well dressed to be a local, and looking too serene to be normal, was a strange individual of indeterminate species. Their eyes slid from one end of the bar to the other, these easy going smile on their lips looking off in a way nobody could quite put a finger to.

    “….Can I help you?” The Bartender asked slowly, cautiously.

    “No, but I can help you.” The voice that came out of them was slow, oily. It sent shivers down the spines of everyone in the room, causing them to reach instinctively for their weapons but stopping just short of taking them out. Their eyes were locked directly on the Captain, who alone of everyone in the room other than the stranger and the Barkeep managed to stay perfectly calm.

    “I doubt dat.” He uttered coolly, sipping from his tankered of beer.

    “There is a job, one my employer needs doing and which I am gathering disreputable forces to accomplish. Your skills are needed, Captain Flynt. The rewards are bountiful, and the challenge for your danger starved crew is very real.” The Captain narrowed his eyes as his crew looked to him. Nobody knew his name. Not a soul save himself and the dead. The urge to dismiss the offer died with that one word being used. He had the sneaking suspicion that declining wasn’t on the table, and he didn’t like the aura this figure was projecting, not enough to try and attack them anyway.

    “I’m listinin’.” The figure’s mouth split into a smile so sharklike, it beat out the actual shark man in the room.

    “The job is simple. We need you to get something for us while the defenders are distracted by the rest of our, shall we say, ‘posse’. The details of the time will be given at the right time.”

    “And where, iffin’ I might ask,” The Captain slowly said as he rolled his left over bear within its tankered. “Mightin’ this location be?” Impossibly, the smile on the figure got even wider.

    “Our destination is a little place called-“


    “Shellfort?” Toyo piped up as he looked at the map in his hands. Indeed, the path their group was on would lead them to arrive at Shellfort within the next day or two.

    “Yup yup!” Kevin piped up as he led the group, skipping to an unheard beat.

    “Um, Kevin,” Alyxia spoke up, sounding a little confused. “Isn’t Shellfort home to the Shellmen? You know, automata?”


    “The isolationist automata?”

    “Sure is!” Alyxia and Toyo both shared a look between themselves at that.

    “Er, Kev, why are we going there?”

    “To sell them Llamas!” The way Kevin said that made it see. Like he was answering the most obvious question in the world with the most obvious of answers.

    “Er-what will robots do with Llamas?” Toyo asked.

    “Isn’t it obvious? They can sell the milk and wool in trade to other places for stuff they want but don’t have themselves.”

    “So wait, you’re planning to bring them out of their centuries long isolation….with Llamas.”


    “….Screw it, I’m all for this plan.” Toyo shrugged. “Not the most impossible thing that’s happened with us to date.”

    “That’s the spirit!” Kevin cheered, giving himself an extra strong hop as he thrust his fist towards the sky.

    “Never a dull moment in this party.” Alyxia giggled.

    “Havin’ regrets?” Toyo teased.

    “Just the one.” Alyxia admitted. “That I didn’t meet you two earlier.” Toyo just smiled an earnest smile at hearing those words from his taller canine friend. “Oh hey, isn’t it almost lunch time?” Kevin paused as he checked the sky, as if using the sun itself like an oversized time piece.”

    “Just about!” He declared cheerfully. With that, the smaller canine male hopped over to smile at his friends. “So, whatcha got for me to try?” Alyxia looked to Toyo as he grinned a trader’s disarming grin as he took off his pack and opened up.

    “We’ll now, how’s about we have a looksie?”
  30. Threadmarks: Cup Noodles, Pt. 3.

    TripleMRed Versed in the lewd.

    Dec 31, 2015
    Likes Received:
    Dantioch Augustus Titus Manius the XXVth was not what one would call a quiet man. Indeed, he was no man at all, but an automata, a machine given sapiency and free will unlike the more common golems of the world. Dantioch, or just ‘Dan’ to his brothers, was like so many of the inhabitants of Shellfort. Steel alloys wrapped around a mythril endoskeleton, moved by haydrolics and wiring beneath his shell like plating, his form vaguely crustacean as a set of decapodian legs carried his shell-backed upper form, his central chassis cloaked by the trappings of his station.

    The High Pontiff of Shellfort was as close to kneeling as his crustacean like lower form could allow, manipulator arms clasped in prayer, binaric recitations of a thousand litanies eagerly second audible from his form, head bowed towards the alter of the symbol of their faith: the septagram said to be one of the symbols of the Great Maker themselves.

    <Uncertain Query: Dan? Pontiff Dan? Do you reside here in the most blessed prayer room?>

    It took much of Dantioch’s considerable discipline to keep from releasing a stream of sound analogous to a sigh.

    <Mildly Agitated Inquisition: What is it, Brother Sirius?>

    Brother-Cleric Sirius Diomedes Autarch De Pasta the IIIrd was the youngest of their number, but promising in his potential. He threw himself into his Clerical studies with feverish abandon, devouring knowledge at a rate impressive even for the automata of Shellfort. Physically, Sirius was of comparable size to Dantioch, as all Shellfort residence had been built to exacting specifications by their original creators. However, there was one massive difference setting the two of them apart: Brother-Pontiff Dan wore the largest hat, and therefore the one in charge.

    <Apologetic Statement: Forgive my intrusion, Brother, but I bring troubling news from the guards.>

    Dan’s optic aparatuses narrowed in such a way as to imitate a heavily lidded gaze.

    <Deadpan Retort: Which guards, Brother.>

    Sirius removed his smaller Cleric’s cap and began to wring it in his manipulators in a clearly unnerved manner.

    <Concerned Statement: All of them, Brother.>

    All at once, Dantioch’s optics shot wide open in shock.

    <What do they report?>

    <Grim Utterance: We are being surrounded.>

    And just as quickly had they widened in shock did Dantioch’s eyes narrow until his optical lights were visible only as pin pricks.

    <Awaken the Battle-Brothers. Rouse the Paladins. Get me everyone.>

    <Confirmation Requested: Everyone?>



    Toyo looked at the spread before him and nodded to himself. It was a good looking spread of appetizers, something to get lunch started with a pleasant refresher course on Kevin’s journey of culinary discovery.

    The only limitation was absolutely no meat allowed. Dairy and fresh eggs were the limit to the animal food products Kevin was willing to indulge in. For their part, the omnivorous Toyo and Alyxia didn’t quite understand the clearly canid, and ominvorous going by dental indentation, Kevin limited himself like this, but they respected their new friend enough to neither pry nor push the matter. After all, he respected them enough not to raise a fuss when they ate meat, it was only right they should do the same for him.

    “Appetizers are looking good.” Toyo spoke out loud as he and Alyx overlooked their hard work.

    “Deviled eggs, egg salad, eggs Benedict, Eggs Lettuce and Tomato, and rice porridge.” Alyxia listed off before letting loose a little giggle. “I feel a little guilty, taking his request and skirting the edge like this with so many egg dishes.”

    “Yeah, I know what you mean.” Toyo uttered with a slightly self conscious chuckle, hand scratching the back of his head. “But these are all the appetizers I know of!”

    “An Eggs Benedict and a ELT are not appetizers, Toyo.” Alyxia teased, another giggle at her throat.

    “To you maybe.” The Goblin male sniffed. With that out of the way, Toyo cupped his hands around his mouth before shouting: “Come and get it!”

    In a literal flash, Kevin appeared before them, a smile on his lips and a giggle in his throat. Saying nothing else, the puppy faced young man hovered down to inspect the offerings before him, sniffing at each one cautiously.

    “We made you a little something of everything as an appetizer.” Toyo explained blithely.

    “Lots of eggs.” Kevin noted out loud, neither in judgement nor suspiciously.

    “They keep fresh in the holding bag.” Toyo uttered lamely. Kevin nodded with a ‘mhm’ before pI king up a deviled egg and popping it into his mouth. He chewed thoughtfully, taking his time and getting a feel for the food’s taste and texture due to it being a new experience for him. After a solid minute of chewing and considering, he finished the egg before pausing with a thoughtful look. Before suddenly eating the rest of the reveled eggs in one go. Toyo and Alyxia both blinked. One second the decorated hard-boils were on their plate, and the next they weren’t.

    “S’good.” Kevin declared with a nod. He then moved on to the Egg Salad, Eggs Benedict and the ELT, both testing them with long, purposeful chewing sessions, before devouring them faster than either of his two friends could process.

    “S’good.” He declared once again, nodding as he moved to the final plate, the rice porridge. Taking a spoonful, he ate it with his now usual long tasting chews….but this time he took longer, as if considering it more than the others. He let the spoon fall back into the bowl.

    “Kind of bland?” He said, clearly surprised himself by his own response.

    “Oh, goodness, that’s my mistake.” Alyxia said with an embarrassed blush. “I forgot to add some salt!” Reaching into Toyos Holding Bag without another word, she retrieved a salt shaker from it and handed it to Kevin. Nodding gratefully, Kevin shook some red salt unto the dish, which began to visibly steam on contact. Toyos eyes widened as he realized Alyxia had grabbed the wrong salt.

    “Kevin, wai-“ It was too late. Kevin ate a spoonful of Fire Salt covered rice porridge. Alyxia, realizing her mistake immediatly as smoke began to seep out of Kevin’s nostrils, clasped her hands over her muzzle, eyes wide with shock.

    “Much better!” Kevin declared before gobbling up the rest of the porridge. “Man, the appetizers turned out great you guys!….Guys?” Smoke still escaping his mouth and nostrils, Kevin quirked his head at his friends in confusion as they silently stared at him not reacting to the hottest spice known to their world. Alyxia steeped her fingers together in front of her muzzle, a look of concern on her face, while Toy just watched wide eyed, one hand covering his mouth in contemplation. Kevin looked between them in confusion.

    “Did I do something wrong? Oh! Right!” Clasping his hand together, he bowed his head towards them. “Thank you for the meal!”

    Alyxia and Toyo mechanically returned the gesture.

    “So, main course is next?” Kevin asked as he licked his still smoking lips. With that, a dam broke and Toyo wound up snorting a laugh, a relieved smile over his face.

    “Yeah, kid.” He declared. “Main course is next.”