Ponzi (Worm/Celestial Forge)

[Autocorruptor]

I wonder if the vial will be a failure and kill or mutate Courtney, that might screw up his relationship with the Elite and maybe Cauldron.

Click to shrink...

That would be horrifying. Maybe if he hears about the potential for mutations, Ponzi might think "eh, if it happens, I'll eventually get a power to fix her up." Then she dies after consuming the vial.
Actually...if Courtney died because of a Cauldron Vial, would Ponzi even feel bad about it?

 

[Cambrian]

Ooh this is on QQ now. Hype

 

[PlasticSoldier]

Spoiler: Formatting

This was copied from Google Docs and the formatting had to be manually corrected, so may have mistakes.

I built a giant cart. It would allow the Titan to push the guns around instead of having to carry them in crates, plus the idea of the CUI's Titan pushing their guns on a giant cart seemed funny to me and I had some spare time, so I built it. That's how I came to be standing in the meeting area an hour early, relaxing in the massively upgraded Ion Titan. I had my crew doing some last-minute upgrades that came to me when I was piloting the variable fighter and touching up the paint job. I personally was trying to come up with someone in the Protectorate that I could call to leave Armsmaster an apology, but I wanted to get an answering machine and my phone wasn't cooperating with my desires.

The CUI team teleported into the meeting area in the middle of the buildings at exactly nine AM. There were six of them standing in a hexagon. They had flowing costumes with loose sleeves and pants. Their outfits were halfway between martial arts uniforms and military uniforms. The costumes were black, and they had dark blue masks.

I greeted them with a sung rendition of the CUI anthem, just as a way to practice my newfound singing power and perhaps to put them at ease. I got the urge to stop singing. These guys clearly didn't appreciate it, so I stopped.

"We'll take the guns," one of them said, "but we have some questions about the vehicle."

"Ask away." I said.

"Is this capable of opening portals like when you removed those ships from the bay?" They asked.

"No." I answered.

"Is it capable of transforming into a plane like the one you used yesterday?" They asked.

"No." I answered.

"Do you think this is your best work?" They asked.

"No." I answered.

"Do you think this is a good deal for us?" They asked.

"Yes." I answered.

"We disagree. We'll take the guns, but we will not buy the robot if it's not your best work." They said.

I wanted to object, but I couldn't come up with anything to say until after they had all gathered around the guns and laid their hands on them. At that point, saying anything would be pointless. It took them a minute to teleport out with the crates of guns, but with the deal done, I could leave and work out my frustrations by planning Leet's beat down. I sort of suspected that the CUI had used some kind of "answer honestly" Master power on me, which I was not happy about. I started working on some designs to remote control Titans. I doubted very many powers could master someone who wasn't even present in person.

The building which the Elite and I thought was Leet's team headquarters turned out to be a regular house on StreetView. Still, I would expect that if Leet was using it as his base that it's not just a normal house on the inside. I'd expect either a secret basement, a portal to the real base, or for it to be absolutely packed full of tinker tech.

Given how difficult attacking a tinker's lab normally is, I decided that I would do the assault when Uber and Leet were out of the building and then either ambush them when they returned or hunt them down once I'd finished securing the building.

Regardless of how I was going to do it, I needed to upgrade my equipment. I was basically using a Titan Pilot suit as my outfit, but I had gotten way more advanced technology since I made it. I checked on the Laboratorium. It had finished analyzing Blasto's goop, and the analysis was reasonably effective. It was essentially a fungus that exuded a cocktail of poisons to clean the area of infections and necrodermis with a stem cell mixture to promote regeneration. It wasn't the most versatile of healing, but it was good at what it did. I probably could heal Fenja's face now. I replaced it in the analysis bay with one of the Privacy Please signs. I didn't know which of the two between the Skull Lab and the Household Problem power was more advanced, but this should be a good way to find out.

When I asked my power for body armor, it wanted to turn me into a cyborg, which I didn't have any problems with, except with the part where I wouldn't be able to hide the white plastic and blue electronic panelling that would replace my skin. Fortunately, I didn't actually need a full-body covering. I just needed a bracelet-sized piece of the toughest armor I could make, and my fashion non-victim power would make it as if I was wearing a full suit.

What I ended up with was my Titan Pilot outfit, but with the helmet senses completely replaced with the best I could do. On my arms were the micromanipulator gloves, I had stuffed my pockets with odds and ends, over my back was a plasma rifle enhanced to the best of my ability, with a matching pistol on my diamond-buckled belt to complete the outfit. It actually wasn't as big a change as I was thinking it would be, but that's what happens when a power makes most armor pointless to wear.

With that done, I drove off to do a stakeout. I was going to check out Leet's base and wait until they left if they were there, so I could burgle it in peace. I brought a few computers, so that if they were still there I could upgrade my SUV while I waited.

My SUV drove itself through their neighborhood as casually as I could program it to. Then it parked on the side of the road two doors down from them. That was close enough to get an excellent view, but not close enough to make them suspicious.

I could tell that they were still home, and that this was the right place. Not just because my computer and my hack tools said so, but because of the car in the drive yard. It said that it was a Hunter Manhattan Custom. It looked like one of those low-rider cars. I didn't recognize the make and model, but looking it up online led me immediately to a racing game, which is exactly the kind of thing I would expect Leet to drive.

I settled in to wait for them to leave. Fortunately, I had tinted windows, a bunch of tinkering tools including my gloves, and some computers to keep me busy. I didn't really have anything in mind to start with, just a desire not to waste time while waiting, but I quickly focused on upgrading the dashboard computer to be a mobile backup of my base's hacking computer. The upgrades might also work to relay remote control signals.

It was probably two hours later that I recognized the two guys from Fugly Bob's and saw them leave in their custom car. They were probably going out to lunch since it was that time of day. I quickly got my tinkering to a good stopping point, which should have given them time to get some distance. Then I got out of my car, walked up to their door, and used my micromanipulator gloves to pick the lock.
I heard the shrieking of an alarm when I opened the door and immediately ran to where the sound came from. Fortunately, it was one of those home security alarms that gave you time to deactivate them in case you trigger them accidentally. I punched in 1-2-3-4. That was wrong, but not completely. I punched in 1-5-6-7. That was even better. I punched in 1-3-3-7 and that was correct!

I took a moment to relax as the alarm deactivated, before feeling embarrassed on Leet's behalf for having such a dumb passcode. Looking around I saw they covered the walls of their place in video game posters with shelves covered in otaku swag. I took a second to close and lock the front door as I cringed deeply. These guys have clearly never heard of girlfriends, much less tried talking to women.
Well, it didn't really matter to me. I had discovered an exploit with my power to know how to operate technology. When I look at say a Poké Ball, I can tell immediately if it's tinker tech or a toy by what instructions I get for how to operate it. That was when the real plundering began. I picked up everything that looked like tinker tech and gave it a few pokes and prods. That was enough for my reverse-engineering powers to at least learn the broad strokes of what it did. I found what was probably a bathroom door and opened my pocket dimension through it. The boring stuff then went immediately through the portal, while I kept playing with the interesting stuff until I needed my hands for new stuff.

It was going well until I messed with an arcade cabinet. I recognized it as tinker tech, so I pressed the button for one player mode to see what made it special when it shot out some kind of scanning laser that paralyzed me. It horrified me for a second as I saw my body dissolve into pixels and vanish from the feet up.

Fortunately, I wasn't dead. Unfortunately, I did not know where I was. I felt a ringing in my ear and tried to smack it like a mosquito.

"Snake!" A voice shouted in my ear. "I'm glad you made it! When the plane went down, we were worried we lost you."

"Who is this?" I asked the air, as I noticed a sort of grey blur appear in my vision and resolve into a rectangle with a grey-scale video of a black man in it.

"I'm SIGINT, Snake." He said. "We should probably start with checking your health and reflexes to make sure you have what you need for the mission. Now, you should be able to change what you see by moving your head. Test that now."

I looked around. I seemed to be on the shore of some green river in the middle of a mountainous forest. It was hot, almost unbearably so. Maybe this was Central America near the equator?

"Great, now try moving around to make sure your legs work." SIGINT continued.

I started walking downriver hoping civilization would be that way.

"Great, now your silenced pistol should still be in your hip holster. Test that now." SIGINT continued.

I pulled out a pistol that definitely wasn't there before and was a little surprised that my tinker abilities gave me advice on it. I wouldn't have been surprised if being in a video game had messed them up. My gun was a High Standard HDM with an integrated silencer. It was decent back in its day, but nothing compared to what I could build. I saw a porcupine rat chewing on something while sitting on a log and blew its head off with a stapling sound.

"Great, you should also have a KA-BAR. Any other equipment you will need to procure on site. You should have already read the briefing on RORSCHACH INK, but I'll give you a summary." SIGINT said. "In the five years since the VIRTUOUS MISSION, we have been looking for any sign that the Soviets intend to build a successor to the Shagohod. We have found no definitive proof, but we've been hearing some frightening rumors that they intend to deploy a successor platform on behalf of their allies in the Vietnam War. We want you to surveill the Viet Cong facility at Khe Sanh and extract any information to verify or disprove this. We'd also appreciate any other information that could be of value to the war, but that's a secondary objective."

I wanted to just ignore the mission and get out of here, but ironically I'd likely need a tinker workshop to make my own way out of here and the easiest way to find one of those is probably to do the mission, assuming this is a METAL GEAR game.

Despite not being as big of dorks as the gamer duo, I still knew enough to know how this game worked. You do your best to sneak to the objective, picking off guards as you can, but eventually, they notice you, and either you Rambo the rest of the mission or you run away until the guards forget you exist.

I had been walking downriver ever since the tutorial let me walk, but I stopped as I saw what was probably a guard post up ahead. My pistol didn't have a scope, but I could see three or four men wandering around. They didn't have the outfits of soldiers, but they did have the guns. I got off the riverbank and hid in the forest, hoping that would let me move further downriver without being spotted.

Trying to sneak past the guard post made me realize that I needed to go through it. It was guarding the top of a waterfall and the only path down that didn't involve jumping off a cliff. So, I really had no choice.

I took a minute or two to relax in the underbrush and watch the guards before I made my move. I picked out the two that were most exposed and dumped half a magazine into the pair. The alarm went off after the first one went down, and the moment the second went down, I dove back into the underbrush and crawled away. I could hear a fair amount of return fire and felt a bite on my shin before it went silent. It hurt a fair amount, but much less than it would in actual life. Regardless, I took it as a signal to stop moving and lie still. Maybe I could pick off the remaining guards when they investigate near me?

I could hear some rustling of the nearby foliage. I responded by aiming my pistol at the rustling and shifting around to get into position. I saw a man with a flashlight and dumped the rest of my magazine into him. The alarm stopped as the man fell, and I breathed a sigh of relief.

With the guards dead, I didn't see the need for stealth, so I just stood up and searched the guards for supplies. I got an AK-56 with ammo, a flashlight, and a canteen off the guards. I expected my leg to slow me down, but after a minute of limping on it, it stopped hurting and I could walk normally. I reloaded my pistol, but I had found no replacement ammo, so I was on my last magazine.

I felt this was a good time to experiment and see if I could take the straightforward way out. I re-summoned my key and used it on the guard post's door. That didn't work. Instead of opening a portal to my pocket dimension, it just turned the door into a missingno that lasted even after I took my key out. I didn't feel entirely safe glitching a game while I was inside of it, so I resolved to delay further testing for later. There was a radio in the guard post, but there was nothing to hear right now and it was too big for me to carry comfortably, so I left it behind.

I got another power as I walked downriver. I could immediately identify any defects in hardware upon casual observation. By hardware, I mean devices, vehicles, and buildings. This would be very useful for making sure stolen Leet tech wouldn't kill me and might synergize with my reverse-engineering powers. If it worked on virtual reality hardware, that would be a cherry on top.

The walk downriver was much more pleasant than I would have expected. There wasn't as much wildlife as I would have expected. I shot some kind of Komodo Dragon that hissed at me and refused to back off, but I wasn't being swarmed by the mosquitos that I would have expected in this kind of environment. Maybe Leet left them out of the game because he didn't like them either? My idle musings ended as I passed a turn in the river and saw an outpost up ahead. It wasn't big, but it had a bridge across the river and a few buildings. I could probably go around, but this place may be just big enough to have a computer or metal shop.

I wanted some reassurance before risking my life. So, I pushed on the skin by my ear and whispered to the air, "SIGINT?".

"What is it, Snake?" SIGINT asked.

"What happens if I die here?" I asked.

"If you die, then you respawn at the checkpoint, Snake." SIGINT said.

"Where is that?" I asked.

"Right now, it's after I gave you the mission briefing." He said.

"Thanks, SIGINT." I said as I took my hand off my ear.

I still didn't want to put my life in the hands of a video game and would not die recklessly, but the reassurance was the push I needed to decide to seize the facilities. I snuck closer so that I could more carefully examine the outpost. Fortunately, my defect detection power worked on the buildings. Knowing that I could knock the two guard towers over with surprisingly few bullets was useful and about what I'd expect in the actual world. Knowing that I could pass through the walls of the actual buildings with really fast jumping and shoot through partially-open doors without damaging them was useful, but much stranger.

The outpost itself was a sort of square, cut in half by the river, with a bridge and a road perpendicular to the river. Essentially, a square made of four smaller squares. There was an empty flat space in the bottom right, with three buildings in the other squares, and a pair of guard towers on the left and right in the middle overlooking the entrances along the road.

One facility looked like a command post. It had a radar dish on the top and a fair amount of electronic equipment inside, maybe even an actual computer. That would be my target. The other two buildings looked to be a barracks and storage. I could see about a dozen guys, but there could easily be twice that.

The sun seemed to pass much faster than in the real world, and every so often a few military trucks would drive by. I barely had time to scope out the facility and check my ammo before it was sundown and time for me to make my move. I lined up my rifle's sight with the man in the guard tower on my side of the river and pulled the trigger.

The alarm sounded as I moved to shoot the guy in the other guard tower. I would not approach from that side, but I didn't want that guard showing up later. After those first two easy kills, it became more of a classic shootout. When I saw someone moving or shooting at me, I fired a burst at them. The Viet Cong weren't very good shots and I couldn't tell if that was because they were rice farmers with guns or if they were just programmed that way, but they had shot me twice by the time I emptied my mag.

I ran forward to cover and dove behind a tree to reload my gun. That tree also got them to stop shooting at me. My plan at that point was to wait for them to send a few guys to look for me and kill them, before retreating to cover and letting the cycle repeat.

That plan actually died pretty quickly. As I was relaxing behind a tree, a grenade flew by and landed next to me. I picked up my gun and burst from cover, shooting non-stop at the three guys who had gotten close to my hiding spot. I had emptied my mag and been shot an uncomfortable amount of times, but there was still one of them standing. I rushed him and pulled out my pistol as I did so. He almost seemed surprised by my actions, but I didn't care. I shot a few rounds from my pistol and was getting ready to jump on him by the time he finally fell down.

Still, I couldn't let myself relax for a second. I robbed my attackers for a few fresh mags, a Makarov PM pistol, and a pair of frag grenades. I couldn't move quickly given that they had shot me a half-dozen times, but I could still waddle forward. The sun had gone down during my assault and I took advantage of that fact. They had made the walls of this facility of sandbags, so it would be easy to jump them at the corner once I recovered. Until then, I could lie down in front of them and recover without being seen unless they randomly pointed a flashlight at me. The alarm was still on, so that was a possibility, but that's why I had guns.

I couldn't tell how long it was until my injuries healed, but I knew the alarm had died down by the time I felt fully healed. Which was unfortunate, since my next act was certain to set it off again. I went up to a crouching position and slung my cheap Chinese knockoff rifle over the top of the sandbags.

I saw three guards just walking around. One of them saw me immediately, but he died immediately. The other two at least got off a burst of fire before I killed them. With the coast temporarily clear, I jumped the sandbags and started running straight towards the comms building. The alarm was of course blaring, but I didn't care. I saw two people on my way to the comms building and sprayed them with bullets; I didn't check if they actually hit or anything because that was merely suppressing fire.

I bulldozed my way through the door and shut it behind me. There were two guys in here and I was worried about accidentally shooting the electronics, but fortunately, they both stood up when I entered the building and I could shoot them both in the head without my bullets overpenetrating and damaging any equipment. I should play some more video games if the enemies are usually this easy to beat.

I took advantage of that flaw in the building I discovered earlier and hid behind the door. Every so often a guard opened it and I opened fire. My bullets would phase through the door harmlessly, while the guards couldn't shoot me because they didn't see me. This happened about five times before it stopped happening and the alarm died down. That silence convinced me I was in the clear.

Fortunately, this comms station basically had everything I needed. Besides a full set of old-time radio and radar equipment, it also had an honest to god personal computer. I wasn't sure that personal computers actually existed at this time. Sure, it probably struggled to run MS-DOS, but even that still seemed like something that shouldn't exist until the 80s. Was this weirdness a Metal Gear thing or a Leet thing? I didn't think it really mattered.

I was even more amazed when I started playing with the computer and discovered that it actually ran its terminal in a virtual environment in the arcade cabinet. This was such a massive security vulnerability that I had to assume that Leet built it in intentionally so that he could work on the game from the inside. I would gladly follow in his footsteps.

It wasn't that hard to get to a debug console for the game, and despite the temptation to rewrite this entire game until it's something I'm happy with, I had somewhere to be. It took me a minute or two to figure out how to use the debug console, but when I did I typed in my final debug command and pressed enter.

With a flash of light and a demented cacophony of beeping, I rematerialized back in the gamer base. It seemed that Uber and Leet had gotten back from lunch while I was trapped in their game. I could hear one of them running towards me, so it might have been a good idea to turn off the sound before I left the game.

♬ This is America bitch / And I'm a capitalist ♬

My theme song started playing at that point, so stealth was probably a lost cause, and I reacted by pulling out my plasma pistol. The moment Leet came around the corner, probably expecting to beat some tinker tech back into shape, I took aim at his hips and fired. His left leg fell off and a chunk of the wall behind him collapsed.

I then charged forward to make sure that Uber wouldn't do anything to screw this up for me. He was looking through the couch cushions when I came into the living room and aimed the gun at his head.

"Surrender and I'll give Leet the medical attention he needs." I said.

"You're not supposed to do this!" Uber shouted.

"Hmm?" I asked.

"It's against the Unwritten Rules to attack a cape in their home." Uber said.

I wasn't sure how to answer that because I wasn't entirely sure what the Unwritten Rules were, but this seemed like a situation that called for some fast talk. "Well, I wasn't attacking you in your home. I was stealing tinker tech while the tinker was out of their lab and then they came back and I had to fight my way out." I said. I'd have to ask Entourage if that was allowed.

"That's not how things work." Uber shouted.

I tapped my pistol in such a way to make it glow brighter for a second. "Do you want me to save Leet?" I asked. "Or do you want to join him in the morgue?"

"Fine," Uber said, "just do your stupid healing thing and leave."

I had no intention of "just leaving", but if that thought kept him calm, I wouldn't argue with him. I waved him in front of me towards Leet and then followed him. Leet was still awake, but his screams had died down to mere whimpers at this point. I used my micromanipulator gloves and my crew to modify my plasma pistol in very precise ways that will either have the effect I want or fail usefully. When Uber and I got back to Leet, I went for it and fired another shot from my plasma pistol. This shot was a wide beam that cauterized Leet's amputation cleanly. Cleanly except for the scorch marks on the ground and the Xtreme Beach Volleyball poster that Uber knocked off the wall when I jumped back, that is.

Leet seemed to have passed out in the meantime, but I can fix that. "Hey Uber. Where does Leet have his own medical gear? My pistol's cauterizer mode isn't enough for this." I said. He pointed me to what was probably the garage and told me to get this thing that looked like a fire hose attached to a backpack. Despite the suspicion that this was a trick, I went to look for it. While I was doing that, I got another power. I was too busy looking for medical equipment to pay attention to the details, but it was a garage with spare parts and a free car.

I found the healing gun he described and my power even said it still worked. It was a bit difficult to wear a backpack when you were carrying a rifle on your back, but with some effort, I switched my plasma rifle to being hip-carried. I discovered the trick when I got back to Leet and found Uber pointing a subwoofer with a trigger at me.

"Now, you're going to heal him, completely, or I'm going to shoot you." He said in a slightly manic tone.

I gave him a nod while I pointed my healing gun at Leet's passed out form. Meanwhile, my micromanipulator gloves and my crew are working to give this gun a second, or actually a third, firing mode. If Uber thought it was weird for a healing gun to shift and spark constantly, he didn't say anything.

When I finished with the modifications and healing Leet, I switched to the third mode and fired on Uber, sedating him perfectly and instantly. I decided I would either keep the gun or I might make my own that isn't obviously stolen from a video game. It was good tech. The exact technology I broke in here to steal, in fact.

I used the Medigun to sedate Leet as well, and then I got back to stealing all of their tinker tech. It took a while and I had to sedate the duo a few more times just to be sure, but it was very lucrative work. I even took their stupid car by bringing it into the garage and opening a portal to my garage with the garage door's inside as the door. This was my first opportunity to see the garage my power had given me, and I liked it. It looked like a very mundane garage with room to store more cars than I realistically needed. The parts supply it came with was pretty good as well. I remembered how much use I could get out of a replenishing supply of sheet metal and wood. I'd probably be able to go pretty far with a replenishing supply of car parts, if I hadn't gone through the trouble of stealing a few dozen scrapped ships. I made a note to test whether I could use the parts on things that weren't cars. I had an idea to improve my main computer by using some of this gear to build a liquid nitrogen cooling system, but it wouldn't surprise me if my power arbitrarily forbade that. One of the strangest things about the garage was the 1960 Chevy Impala that came with it. That would normally be a classic car, but the one in my garage looked like it went those fifty years without maintenance. It was easier to find ways to break it than it was to not break it.

Regardless, dealing with my car wasn't a priority, so I got back to work and went to look for hidden labs. I didn't find any there. They probably had other facilities that I would need to look for, I got my revenge on them for wasting my time by taking even their mundane furniture with me. I decided against stripping the walls of copper wire, because that would just be tacky. With everything worth stealing, stolen, I called up Entourage.

"Yes?" She answered.

"Mission success, mam." I said. "I have both Uber and Leet captured and unconscious. What do you want done with them?"

"I'm actually hosting a party right now." She said. "So, if you and Courtney show up, you can drop them off with the guards by my elevator, and join the fun."

"That actually sounds pretty fun." I said. "I should see you in half an hour, then."

Obviously, Courtney was happy to go to a party with me. The two unconscious people I was bringing with in the back seat only temporarily freaked her out. The security guards were happy to take them off my hands before one of them waved me into the elevator and used their key card to send us up to the penthouse.

It really impressed Courtney that the elevator opened directly into Gabriella's apartment, and I also thought it was nice. The apartment had a very open floor plan, so the various rooms were less separate rooms and more spaces within the one floor-spanning room that were set up for different purposes. Though she had a few more defined rooms on the other side of her apartment. With a floor plan like that, it was easy to see how big and richly furnished her apartment was. I would probably have just as nice of a place once I started spending money on things other than tinker tech.

The party was already reasonably under way with about a dozen people spread out through her apartment. Half the people were chatting and drinking in her dining room, with a few more on an improvised dance floor, and the rest watching TV in her living room. Teamster, Estibador, and Squad were huddled up around some drinks in the dining room. I almost hit myself then since I had just realized that Squad was Entourage in disguise. An unknown late-20s or early-30s couple had taken over the dance floor. They were most likely capes, but were in the same business casual style that Entourage used as a businesswoman. Parian and Gabriella were over in the living room on a couch watching some movie. It might be Halsey's Anatomy or some other daytime drama.

My defect detection power let me know the windows were bulletproof, but wouldn't stand up to any serious attack by me. It gave much more interesting results on Estibador's power armor, so I went to talk shop with him. Courtney used that as her opportunity to go over to Parian and Gabriella.

The two guys on Vargas's hero team were closer to mercenaries who signed up with Entourage for the paycheck. Estibador was much more of one, though, with Teamster actually being interested in heroism and just happy for a paycheck. Estibador was actually a case 53. He didn't have a body and had to build his own arms and legs. It surprised me he even did it at all, but I really have no grounds to complain about tinkers being bullshit. We started bouncing ideas off of each other and would have continued like that for a while, but Teamster went to get a refill of whatever he was drinking and I asked him to get me one as well. He seemed pretty young. It almost looked like it was his first night drinking with how poorly he was handling it.

Even a conversation with another tinker wasn't something I could keep up forever. I eventually wanted to do something different, so I went over to the living room to check on my girlfriend. She was doing pretty well, sitting on the couch with Parian and Entourage, just making small talk. Parian seemed nervous to be here and looked like she needed some cheering up, but Entourage had spent much of the evening cuddling with her on the couch. I took my seat next to Courtney, and we tried to mimic their pose, which was a bit difficult to do with our drinks, but we managed.

After a few minutes of cuddling, Entourage called over the couple from the dance floor and introduced the woman as Speaker of the House and the man as Upperhand. Apparently, they weren't a couple; they were just Entourage's minions and my fellow Elite members. They got to know both me and Parian as the new members. I found out that they actually followed Entourage here from San Francisco, where they work at her company.

Meeting fellow Elites jogged my memory. I remembered that Entourage promised to get me a lab. Fortunately, when I asked she got me the keys pretty promptly. They hid it in one of the basement levels of one of the dock factories that her company was trying to get back into operation. I'd have to check it out tomorrow.

I felt my power try to give me another power. It turned out to be another dud. With that done, I dragged Courtney away with me and went to do some actual partying. The two of us took turns on the dance floor and played a drinking game where anyone who screwed up would take a drink. We were mostly doing it with sips of the mixed drinks that were available, since we didn't want to get drunk too fast, but we still got pretty drunk given how long we played. Every so often one of the others would come and join us for a few rounds and Courtney and I would try to team up to mess with them.

The party was pretty awesome, but eventually even we had to leave. We'd have to make this a regular thing. My good mood was ruined though when the elevator stopped half a floor away from the garage. I could fix it, but I didn't want to.

Before I could try to fix it, a portal opened up and replaced the elevator door. It opened up into some sterile, all-white building. I had my pistol out before my girlfriend had even mumbled a response.

"I'd prefer it if you put that away." A voice from around the corner said before a black woman in an all-white dress suit walked around the edge. "My name is Doctor Mother. Entourage promised to give your girlfriend superpowers, yes? I am the person who does that, but first we need to talk about what you need."

Spoiler: Author's Note

I originally intended this Leet side story as a reference to Waifu Warz, but it's gone through enough revisions, I doubt anyone could tell.

Spoiler: Celestial Forge Bookkeeping

Leftover wc: 257
Wordcount: 6239
Excess: 496

-Analysis (Red Alert 3) (100CP)
You can immediately identify any defects in hardware upon casual observation. This is effective on devices, vehicles, and buildings.

-Garage (Fast and Furious) (100CP)
You have a nice garage and parts supply. With a few days and some elbow grease, you could basically rebuild your car or cars from the bottom up; you probably have enough parts to keep someone else's ride running or give it an upgrade, too.

The Vehicle: Free!
This object barely deserves the title of car, at least in your opinion. A Volkswagen Beetle, a Pinto, or a Yugo, this car technically meets all the criteria and is very cheap, but it would take a master mechanic and a driving god to let it rival even the worst other racers can bring to the table.
Saved 100 CP

 

[Tournament of course]

This is why you should not deal with the CUI. What are you thinking mc? The CUI might as well kidnap and brainwash you to be their personal Tinker.
Besides that, oh boy becoming the menace of other tinkers in Brockton Bay not going to end good for him. Properly use his time to tinker more and create new technology for his personal use and safety.

The chapter was good though mc is chaotic in what he's doing/planning that takes some time to follow along.

 

[012345]

Estibador was actually a case 53. He didn't have a body and had to build his own arms and legs.

Click to shrink...

Trainwreck?

I had emptied my mag and been shot an uncomfortable amount of times,

Click to shrink...

I been wondering something. It seems as his powers work in Game. As in his Tinkering and new Weakpoint vision.

But shouldnt his Fashion Perk give him body durable enought to ignore bullets? What about TK he gained in previus chapter? Why not use it?

 

[Tournament of course]

Trainwreck?

I been wondering something. It seems as his powers work in Game. As in his Tinkering and new Weakpoint vision.

But shouldnt his Fashion Perk give him body durable enought to ignore bullets? What about TK he gained in previus chapter? Why not use it?

Click to shrink...

Firing the facts on all cylinders. When comparing this Mc using the Celestial Forge from Joe from Brockton's Cleastial Forge, you can see the difference in applications and approach in using the forge. Impulsive and not laying low vs laying low and improving self.

I am wondering why he does not Practice and learn how to use his Telekinesis and incorporate it when he is tinkering.

 

[Autocorruptor]

of opening a portal to my pocket dimension, it just turned the door into a missingno that lasted even after I took my key out

Click to shrink...

typo?

"You're not supposed to do this!" Uber shouted

Click to shrink...

Uber, the Unwritten Rules are not worth the paper they aren't written on.

couch with Parian and Entourage, just making small talk. Parian seemed nervous to be here and looked like she needed some cheering up, but Entourage had spent much of the evening cuddling with her on the couch.

Click to shrink...

Well, it seems someone got a girlfriend!

 

[012345]

Firing the facts on all cylinders. When comparing this Mc using the Celestial Forge from Joe from Brockton's Cleastial Forge, you can see the difference in applications and approach in using the forge. Impulsive and not laying low vs laying low and improving self.

I am wondering why he does not Practice and learn how to use his Telekinesis and incorporate it when he is tinkering.

Click to shrink...

On other hand Ponzi is more than wiling to actualy use stuff in forge no matter what it is.

When I asked my power for body armor, it wanted to turn me into a cyborg, which I didn't have any problems with, except with the part where I wouldn't be able to hide the white plastic and blue electronic panelling that would replace my skin.

Click to shrink...

Like Joe goes completly mental on anything that could even be mistaken for biotinkering or in any way modifing his body.

Perks that grants tech to give 'powers' to people after some experimentation? Joe whines about getting it while Ponzi would most likely ask his girlfiend do she wants them(powers). While also asking about fleshshaping her into supermodel. Or maybe even to it without asking and make her 'suffer' 'horror' of being wet dream of any male(that how Joe would see it).

Ponzi is certainly not kind of person to hesitate about deploying robot army if it would make solving his problems easier.

 

[Tournament of course]

So far in comparison of forge users: Ponzi thinks in short term and don't think about the full consequences of his actions, while Joe thinks both of the short and Long term and make sure not to doing things that will give him a kill order on his head. Ponzi is a tinker that has no shard and if he continues what he is doing he is going to become trapped with no way out since he did this to himself. Maybe tech smart but not fully smart or careful in other things unlike Joe. (What I personally think so far)

Before I could try to fix it, a portal opened up and replaced the elevator door. It opened up into some sterile, all-white building. I had my pistol out before my girlfriend had even mumbled a response.

"I'd prefer it if you put that away." A voice from around the corner said before a black woman in an all-white dress suit walked around the edge. "My name is Doctor Mother. Entourage promised to give your girlfriend superpowers, yes? I am the person who does that, but first we need to talk about what you need."

Click to shrink...

Rereading the chapter, I realized Ponzi majorly fucked up big time. Dudes not keeping himself underground and becoming cocky dumbass due to having the Forge. Look what you did now Ponzi, you are flying way to fast an close to the sun and might get yourself burned. Think this through first and alway come up with plans/backup plans.
As Barrett would say: You fucked up. Hell this is karma for the PRT hack attack he did and many other things he has done. Also that was stupid to drag your girlfriend into your cape life and now if they do accept this they are going to be in cauldrons hand with no way out and then will be called for favors to do things for them. You are now a fly in a spider's web. I actually feel no pity for Ponzi since this is his fault. He has gone from owning money to a scam company to not sharks that are way more dangerous and deadly. When will this man learn?
Now the main question is how the bloody hell is he going to un fuck him self and will he finally learn from this that his actions have consequences not only to himself but the people around him and stop thinking about the money.

Hey PlasticSoldier, since Ponzie is now an esper does he also have an AIM field and a Personal Reality? If so then that is greet since his ability could evolve over time and through use and changing his personal reality like accelerator. It's a nice roll since you are open to develop that ability in any direction.
Though he should be careful since magic and esper powers don't do well together seen in Magician-Esper Hybrid.

Spoiler: Videos they take about the esper/science power system

 

[WaNoMatsuri]

treat Menja's burn wounds

Click to shrink...

Fenja's

I'm not a fan of the game segment, but whatever, it's fine. I just have a permanent red spot from facepalming at anything ponzi does ;p

 

[Tournament of course]

Fenja's

I'm not a fan of the game segment, but whatever, it's fine. I just have a permanent red spot from facepalming at anything ponzi does ;p

Click to shrink...

Same here, at first I liked Ponzi but as time goes on I am facepalming at the dumb thing he does without really thinking about his actions . Like going on PHO to sell guns like bro how stupid are you. I know you want to get rich quick but that is just really stupid. Also selling to the CUI, what the hell is wrong with you man?! That the last group to be selling anything to.

 

[tregr]

Same here, at first I liked Ponzi but as time goes on I am facepalming at the dumb thing he does without really thinking about his actions .

Click to shrink...

At some point I realized that Ponzi can very well just escalate past any consequences of his actions. No point in worrying about the future when you're growing at these speeds.

 

[Tournament of course]

At some point I realized that Ponzi can very well just escalate past any consequences of his actions. No point in worrying about the future when you're growing at these speeds.

Click to shrink...

ever if that will get him a kill order due to that growth rate and a target for endbringer attacks, the S9, Teeth and other threats. The Growth rate of the forge has become a double edge sword for Ponzi at this point since he his being open about it.

 

[PlasticSoldier]

Trainwreck?

Click to shrink...

Yes.

I been wondering something. It seems as his powers work in Game. As in his Tinkering and new Weakpoint vision.

But shouldnt his Fashion Perk give him body durable enought to ignore bullets?

Click to shrink...

It's a game. The bullets don't actually do damage to your body. They cause your health to go down and the game pretends that you are actually injured.

What about TK he gained in previus chapter? Why not use it?

Click to shrink...

I didn't really see a situation where "lifting light objects" would be especially useful. Plus, it's a new power, so it's not something he reflexively uses.

typo?

Click to shrink...

Nah, it's this. https://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/MissingNo.

On other hand Ponzi is more than wiling to actualy use stuff in forge no matter what it is.

Like Joe goes completly mental on anything that could even be mistaken for biotinkering or in any way modifing his body.

Perks that grants tech to give 'powers' to people after some experimentation? Joe whines about getting it while Ponzi would most likely ask his girlfiend do she wants them(powers). While also asking about fleshshaping her into supermodel. Or maybe even to it without asking and make her 'suffer' 'horror' of being wet dream of any male(that how Joe would see it).

Ponzi is certainly not kind of person to hesitate about deploying robot army if it would make solving his problems easier.

Click to shrink...

This is true.

Fenja's

I'm not a fan of the game segment, but whatever, it's fine. I just have a permanent red spot from facepalming at anything ponzi does ;p

Click to shrink...

I thought the game segment was kind of cute. I wanted fighting Uber and Leet to be a challenge, and "Trapped in a video game" was the most thematic challenge I could come up with.

 

[NakedFury]

As this character is using his powers for making weapons and acquiring money. Have you thought about him trying out government military weapon contracts? I dont think I saw anything about his weapons not being replicable without powers, at least the simple ones, and he could use some goodwill with the government by making and selling them power weapons.

Not PRT, the US Marines or US navy directly.

Its just that this character seems perfect for it and its not something I have ever seen before in any super hero novel.

 

[war piglet]

Excellent chapter. I'm glad Ponzi didn't rip the copper wires out of the walls. At least he has some shame, even if it is miniscule.

Parian! I love Parian. She is the cutest character in Worm. How can you not love someone that puts on children's shows and rides around on giant stuffed animals. Does she realize she is cuddling with the Elite? Or does she only know the hero identity?

It would be cool for Parian to realize her powers benefits from leather, but I can't imagine her exploring leather puppets of her own accord. A powerful Parian wouldn't fit her character well either. I guess that is why no one bothers with it in fanfics.

 

[WaNoMatsuri]

I thought the game segment was kind of cute. I wanted fighting Uber and Leet to be a challenge, and "Trapped in a video game" was the most thematic challenge I could come up with.

Click to shrink...

It's probably because I had flashbacks to when I tried to play... fuck, why am I so bad at remembering names? anyway, it was something out of 00s, I think, first of the franchise and it not aged well. It was pretty similiar, you are dropped on some island and have to go do something while shooting enemies. It didn't help I discovered I don't like the genre, I'm more into stealth like Assassin's Creed.
The scene was fine, just not for me, but you know, there wasn't a person born that could appease everyone. <-- does that saying translate ok? does english have an equivalent?
so don't sweat.

 

[qwer303]

So far in comparison of forge users: Ponzi thinks in short term and don't think about the full consequences of his actions, while Joe thinks both of the short and Long term and make sure not to doing things that will give him a kill order on his head. Ponzi is a tinker that has no shard and if he continues what he is doing he is going to become trapped with no way out since he did this to himself. Maybe tech smart but not fully smart or careful in other things unlike Joe. (What I personally think so far)


Rereading the chapter, I realized Ponzi majorly fucked up big time. Dudes not keeping himself underground and becoming cocky dumbass due to having the Forge. Look what you did now Ponzi, you are flying way to fast an close to the sun and might get yourself burned. Think this through first and alway come up with plans/backup plans.
As Barrett would say: You fucked up. Hell this is karma for the PRT hack attack he did and many other things he has done. Also that was stupid to drag your girlfriend into your cape life and now if they do accept this they are going to be in cauldrons hand with no way out and then will be called for favors to do things for them. You are now a fly in a spider's web. I actually feel no pity for Ponzi since this is his fault. He has gone from owning money to a scam company to not sharks that are way more dangerous and deadly. When will this man learn?
Now the main question is how the bloody hell is he going to un fuck him self and will he finally learn from this that his actions have consequences not only to himself but the people around him and stop thinking about the money.

Hey PlasticSoldier, since Ponzie is now an esper does he also have an AIM field and a Personal Reality? If so then that is greet since his ability could evolve over time and through use and changing his personal reality like accelerator. It's a nice roll since you are open to develop that ability in any direction.
Though he should be careful since magic and esper powers don't do well together seen in Magician-Esper Hybrid.

Spoiler: Videos they take about the esper/science power system

Click to shrink...

Why would he own anything to cauldron, it's Elite who made a deal and Ponzi have money to just pay off for power.

 

[Tournament of course]

Why would he own anything to cauldron, it's Elite who made a deal and Ponzi have money to just pay off for power.

Click to shrink...

when dealing with Cauldron like vials/powers in a bottle you end up owing them a favor.

 

[Weyrling]

The scene was fine, just not for me, but you know, there wasn't a person born that could appease everyone. <-- does that saying translate ok? does english have an equivalent?

Click to shrink...

Translates okay.
The equivalent saying/quote would probably be: "You can please some of the people all of the time, you can please all of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time".

 

[zapking5]

when dealing with Cauldron like vials/powers in a bottle you end up owing them a favor.

Click to shrink...

The Elite are paying for the vial though, that presumably includes any favors. I don't think Accord pays in favors every time he buys another set of vials from Cauldron either, this isn't the standard case of someone buying a vial for themselves since it is a recurring business relationship with the Elite.

 

[Grimmouse197]

Meeting fellow Elites jogged my memory. I remembered that Entourage promised to get me a lab.

Click to shrink...

Umm "Fellow Elites".......I don't recall him joining them ......is he mastered?

 

[Tournament of course]

Umm "Fellow Elites".......I don't recall him joining them ......is he mastered?

Click to shrink...

that is a defiant master effect right there.

 

[PlasticSoldier]

Umm "Fellow Elites".......I don't recall him joining them ......is he mastered?

Click to shrink...

that is a defiant master effect right there.

Click to shrink...

No, he joined the Elite the normal way. Entourage offered him a position a few chapters ago, he decided to go forward with it, either a chapter or two ago, and this party was sort of an all-Elite cape get together.

 

[kayangelus]

"It's against the Unwritten Rules to attack a cape in their home." Uber said.

Click to shrink...

Were the Unwritten Rules ever brought up in canon beyond the one point when Tattletale mentioned them? You know, before going on to violate them right away at their very next crime when she started hurting Amy with those details of her non-Cape life that were supposed to be off limits according to said rules?

 

[PlasticSoldier]

"Wait, Entourage was going to give me superpowers?" Courtney asked.

"Yes, that's actually why I asked you what kind of powers you would want at lunch two days ago." I said to Courtney before turning to Doctor Mother. "Forgive me. I wasn't expecting to meet you in an elevator."

"Few people do," she said, "but with the anti-Thinker devices you have, it's difficult to plan a meeting with you. If you're ready to proceed, then you just need to step through the portal. Otherwise, the Elevator will be fixed within minutes."

I was tempted to just stay here and schedule this meeting later like a normal person, but Courtney seemed to have her own ideas. I felt her tug on me a few times, before I let her stumble through the portal and followed her through.

"Welcome to Cauldron." Doctor Mother said as we looked around. The building was clean and sterile like a hospital, but its emptiness, both of people and objects, gave it a spooky atmosphere. It did not help the spookiness when the portal closed without a sign or sound.

Doctor Mother took us through a door that seamlessly blended into the wall to an office that was just as creepily empty and white as the hallway. There was a couch in front of her desk, and both Courtney and I were happy to lounge for a second before we got down to business.

"Now, the normal way these meetings go is that clients search for us on their own, we give suitable clients the basic pitch, then if they're interested we invite them to a meeting, sell them a vial, and give them a space to use it when they're ready, but you aren't our normal clients, so bear with me if this is a bit improvised." She said. "I know your names, but I'd prefer if we didn't use them. If you have pseudonyms you want to be called, tell me and I will use those."

"I'll take Amanda." Courtney said.

"Vargas." I said.

"Good. I must warn you, though, that Cauldron operates on a strict policy of secrecy. If either of you shares what happens here, we have ways to find out and countermeasures that we employ. I expect this meeting to be kept a secret even if you don't see it through."

"Understood." Courtney said, and I gave a small nod when the Doctor looked my way.

"Then, I think we should start by discussing what you would want from this vial, Amanda." Doctor Mother said.

"Well, I don't want anything that would be redundant with, uh, Vargas's work, which means Blaster and Tinker powers are probably all right out." Courtney said. "I'd like something that would be useful to him, but which can still impress people on its own."

"Do you see yourself getting into fights that often?" Doctor Mother asked.

"Almost never. I'd only do that if someone forced me, but I still want something that can be impressive, even if it's not death rays or giant robots." Courtney said.

"I think we should start by looking through our catalog of Thinker and Master abilities." Doctor Mother said as she pulled a binder out from under the desk and dropped it in front of us.

"I'm a little nervous about her having a Master ability." I said.

"Don't worry, many of our abilities are quite subtle if you're worried about the social ramifications." She replied, completely missing what I was worried about as she opened up the binder. "I figured I'd give a rundown of the samples I think you'd like and you can ask questions as we go."

"Sample N0505 also known as Jack grants Thinker powers dealing with skills, whether manipulating, learning, borrowing, or adjusting them. Usually from an external source and sometimes with secondary powers that use the skills."

"Sample N0404 also known as Optic grants a vision-based thinker suite and often comes with a secondary power that is useful on the attack. It routinely comes with mutations to the eyes, but these are usually small and often only when the power is in use."

"Sample N0303 also known as Panopticon grants a zone of complete awareness around the user. The zone usually comes with a secondary mode of variable power."

"Sample N0202 also known as Pitfall grants a Thinker power focusing on weaponizing the environment and may come with a secondary Thinker or Shaker power to assist in that task."

"Sample N0101 also known as Pugilist grants a Thinker power relevant to either close-quarters combat or fist-fighting."

"Sample N0703 also known as Sigmund grants awareness of others' advantages or struggles. Often has a Thinker power to modify these talents, perhaps with Trump or Master elements.

"Sample J6052 also known as Legion grants powers to make duplicates of one's self."

I interrupted at that point. "Did Entourage take that one?"

"It would grant a similar power to what she has, but we don't discuss our previous clients' powers like that." Doctor Mother said. "However, you shouldn't discount the possibility that the resemblance is coincidental. Do you mind if I continue?"

"Sure." I said.

"Is it possible to combine vials?" Courtney asked.

"It is, though overly complicated combinations tend to come with side-effects and we don't have many combinations on hand." Doctor Mother said. "It's a good way to customize things though, if you don't think a pure sample will have the effect you want. We actually mix a bit of the balance sample into all of our vials to reduce side-effects, for instance."

"Samples B0491 and Z0353 also known as Pan and Tyrant grant human-controlling master powers, with slight differences between the two. Tyrant has a tendency to Trump effects while Pan usually manifests through sound."

"Sample O7517 also known as Bloodhound grants thinker powers with a focus on locating or sensing things."

"Sample U0194 also known as Headspace grants thinker powers, but is highly variable in its results."

"Sample P3945 also known as Axon grants a Thinker power that grows stronger when near people and may have Master or Stranger elements.

"Those are the samples which I think would be most interesting to you two. The info on them is at the front of the binder, but further back does contain info about other things."

"Aside from the specific vials, you should also pay attention to the O, P, and R values." Doctor Mother said. "These stand for originality, power, and reliability and are estimates of the resulting power's attributes. The P-value is an estimate of what the power's PRT-threat value would be, while the other two are more subjective with higher being better. These three values also determine the cost of your vial."

"Does that matter given Entourage or maybe the Elite should cover our bill?" I asked.

"It's true that the Elite will pay up to twenty million on your behalf for the vial, but vials can easily cost more than that." Doctor Mother said while Courtney made some kind of choking sound. "If you will agree to perform favors for us at a later day, we would reduce the list price by ten million for each favor up to three."

"How hard are these favors?" I asked as Courtney looked through the pricing grids for the various samples.

"Not particularly strenuous. Usually a simple task like meeting someone or helping to manage an information leak." She replied. This reminded me of my early dealings with Accord, where I was stuck with whatever terms he gave me, and I was afraid that he'd kill me if I said no. Although, if they really can sell powers, they should already have all the money they want.

"I'd be willing to do the three favors, but I'd want, uh, her to do one of them." I said. I had already decided to let Courtney pick out her own vial and only intervene if she gets something completely inappropriate, so it made sense for her to pay some of the cost.

"That seems fair." She replied. "That gives you a price range of fifty million, which you will notice is enough for almost all of our products, but feel free to ask me for help if you want something specific." That was a pretty hefty price tag, but if they do their job well, I can easily see them earning that much fair and square.

"I think I've decided." Courtney said. "Can you do two parts Tyrant and one part Sigmund?"

"Yes, we can. I think we even have a few prepared." She said as she grabbed a paper out of her coat pocket. "Within your price range we have one with P, R, O of 9, 3, 4, one with a P, R, O of 8, 2, 7, and one with a P, R, O, of 6, 5, 6."

"What can you tell me about the first one?" I asked.

"The P, R, O tells you almost all of what I know, but I should warn you that with a Reliability score that low there's a moderate risk of spontaneous mutation. Most mutations are minor and some clients find that small mutations can be mitigated with clothing or tinker tech, but the mutations tend to resist that, so it's not as easy as it might otherwise seem. I just felt obligated to warn you." She said. That raised some questions in my mind, but I decided not to ask her if Cauldron had anything to do with the case 53s.

I looked over at my girlfriend, trying to will her to make a final decision. She gave me a nod and looked at the Doctor. "I think we'll take it." She said.

"I think that's an excellent choice. I'll return with your vial and paperwork, momentarily. However, there is one additional concern in your case." Doctor Mother said as she looked Courtney in the eye. "Our investigation discovered that you are pregnant."

"What?" I said as my girlfriend started squealing.

"You should feel free to confirm the news yourself," Doctor Mother said, "but our investigation into potential clients is quite... thorough."

"We'll need some time to discuss this." I said.

"Yes, I'm sure it's quite a shock," Doctor Mother said, "but you can deal with most of the shock on your own time. What really concerns me is that this increases the risk of complications from taking a vial. You're at most two months pregnant, but you should wait to the end of the pregnancy to take the vial."

After that bombshell, Doctor Mother left the room. It was the first time since the elevator that she had left me and Courtney alone together.

"I'm pretty sure I can fix this." I said.

"We are not getting an abortion!" Courtney screamed in my face.

"Okay, jeez." I said. "I think I can work with that. If I give you a C-section, we can take the fetus and build a womb to hold it. Maybe age it up until it can survive on its own? I'm still thinking of what I can do."

Courtney stared at me after I said that. It was like she was trying to see the back of my head with X-Ray vision. "You really think you could do something like that?"

"Yes, I'm sure." I said, despite not being 100% sure.

"We'll talk about this after we leave," she said, "but I need you to promise me that if anything goes wrong, you'll get Panacea to fix it."

"I'd rather-" I said before Courtney interrupted me.

"NO!" She yelled. "If something goes wrong, you get Panacea."

Then it was my turn to stare at her. Eventually, I said "Fine." and that was the end. Doctor Mother walked back into the room at that point, which stopped any more discussion along those lines. She took her seat again and placed an unlocked briefcase on our side of the table. I motioned for Courtney to deal with it, and she took the hint to reach forward and open the briefcase. Inside the briefcase was a metal canister and two booklets of papers. One of them looked like a contract. The other had a cover that I recognized as a Material Safety Data Sheet.

"As you could figure out on your own, that briefcase contains all the instructions for taking a vial, a canister to carry and protect the vial, and a contract that the both of you will need to read and sign." Doctor Mother said. "I've already signed my parts, but you two will need to sign on pages four, twelve, eighteen, and twenty-one I believe."

Courtney went to sign immediately, but I put a stop to that. Unlike license agreements on websites that I accept unthinkingly, Cauldron actually had the power to punish me if I shirked my obligations. Not to mention the possibility that they had a Master who could simply compel people to follow contracts. There was no way I was signing this without actually reading this and there was no way I'd let Courtney sign something I wouldn't sign.

"It's true that this contract isn't legally binding, although, we can enforce it on our own," Doctor Mother said, "but for many people, the principle of the thing is what matters. It also helps to give people a written explanation of what they're agreeing to."

The contract was a menacing thing. It was as if a mob boss had a team of lawyers dress up their protection racket. The two of us were signing a waiver that we understood the risks and wouldn't hold Cauldron liable if Courtney exploded, a Non-Disclosure Agreement that gave Cauldron a blank check to enforce it, a very vaguely worded agreement to provide three services with at least one being done by Courtney, and a second waiver that we understand the additional risks of drinking a vial while pregnant and would not do it. Eventually, we went ahead and signed it.

"Don't you need a copy of the contract?" I asked, curious, since it seemed I was about to take their only copy.

"Don't worry." Doctor Mother replied. "That's a solved problem for us."

It was getting late anyway, so we quickly left after that. Cauldron was courteous enough to portal us to just behind my store, where we could not be seen unless someone was standing right there. I carried Courtney over to that awesome bed I built last night or so. She fell asleep pretty quickly, which gave me plenty of alone time to do some prep work.

With all this effort we were putting into getting Courtney a power, it felt ironic that my power tried to give me a power I already have, again. A quick calculation based on how often that's been happening let me conclude that my power had at most a thousand possible powers and probably only a few hundred. I wondered what would happen once I got all of them.

The first thing I wanted to do to prepare is to put the vial in the Laboratorium and see what I can learn with non-destructive analysis. The spare "Privacy Please" sign was still in the Laboratorium being analyzed. To my surprise, the lab hadn't disassembled it yet. Checking on the lab's output told me why. The sign's stranger effect was working on the lab, so that every so often it would reset and start scanning it from the beginning. Fortunately, the logs from before its resets were pretty informative. The sign seemed to have discovered a security flaw in the Laboratorium which would probably want to fix. I at least learned the basic principles behind its Stranger ability, but that still needed further study.

I placed the vial into one of the Laboratorium's scanners. I had to turn off a bunch of warnings that this was alien before the skulls got to work, but that was the work of minutes at most.

With that done, I moved on to inventorying Leet's tech with an emphasis on medical technology. He had a lot of healing gadgets with many underlying implementations, but a shortage of the surgical tools and serious bio-tinkering equipment I was looking for. They had some stasis field generators, which would be useful for the fetus though. He also had a fair amount of scanners and sensors, some of which were suited for medical work. Most of his equipment was in poor condition anyway, so I needed my crew to do repairs before I could feel safe using them, which was a perfect opportunity to slip in some small upgrades. It was also pretty helpful in that messing with them was slowly causing me to understand how they worked, which would certainly be helpful if I had to improvise during the surgery.

I tried to think of what devices I would want that Leet's supplies didn't cover. A surgical table didn't count as a household problem, but it was simple enough that I would've been able to build one even without my powers. Same for a variety of mundane doctor tools which are probably redundant with tinker tech, but might be useful to have around, anyway. I had this vita-chamber coming from another Elite tinker, but that's more of a research platform for me than something actually useful.

The real challenge for me was to make something to put the embryo in. My idea for getting the baby out of Courtney was to just do a C-section and heal her up after with tinker tech. That would leave me with an embryo that is at most two months developed. Unfortunately, Leet didn't have any exo-wombs. My household problems power leaped at me with designs for super-cribs. I could make cribs that babies couldn't escape, cribs that were always clean, and cribs that gave perfect sleep, but a crib that could sustain an embryo's life was a bit too much. Why was that too much? Was it just not a common enough problem? Would I suddenly learn how to do it if enough households needed it? Or was there some Platonic household whose problems determined what I could and could not solve?

I had to go with my backup plan of using my full power as a tinker to create a suitable exo-womb. I ended up carving up three of Leet's more damaged devices for spare parts. I didn't hold back any inspiration for the next part. I'd have time to make adjustments if it wasn't perfect, but if it didn't do the bare minimum, I'd need Panacea's help and that would just be embarrassing.

I ended up with what looked like a thick metal suitcase. It opened up and inside had an egg-shaped opening the size of a large house cat. That's where the fetus would grow. It could then fill the chamber with a nutritious artificial amniotic fluid. The machine would then use its healing abilities to provide nutrition while healing any injuries that occurred.

With all that prep work, I went to bed and wrapped up Courtney as the big spoon. I woke up refreshed to the feeling of Courtney getting out of bed. According to my watch, I slept for two hours, but it felt like an instant. I wrapped myself up in the blanket after she got out of bed, but decided to actually get out of bed after a little bit to think about it. We had a cereal breakfast and talked over the procedure.

"So, basically, my plan is to sedate you unconscious, then I'll surgically remove the embryo and probably the surrounding womb. I'll place the embryo into this device that I built for life-support, do my best to heal you from any surgical damage, wake you up, and that should be it." I said during the gaps where I wasn't eating.

"I trust you," Courtney said, "but I need you to promise that you'll get Panacea if anything goes wrong."

I was a bit annoyed by her obsession with Panacea, but didn't see the harm in indulging her. "I promise." I said. "I was expecting to be a father someday, but this is a lot weirder than I expected."

"It's a good kind of weird, though." Courtney said.

"Yeah, yeah, it is." I said. "What do you think about names? I was thinking Steve Junior if it's a boy and Courtney Junior if it's a girl."

Courtney snorted at that. "Maybe something more imaginative? I think we should see the baby before we name it."

"Alright." I said before I started cleaning up after myself. "I'll start getting ready for the procedure. Come over when you're ready to begin."

Courtney took a while to come over. It was long enough for me to finish setting up and start getting impatient, but she came over before I went to see what was taking so long.

"Take off your shirt, get on the bed, and we can start." I said.

"It looks more like a table." She said, before lying down on it.

"Tomehto, Tomahto." I said before knocking her unconscious with the Medigun. I started the procedure by doing a medical scan. It was like an X-ray, but with much more detail and in video form. Aside from the pregnancy, Courtney was in decent health. She should exercise more, drink less, and floss, but that applies to everyone, really. The fetus was barely an inch long and barely even had a heartbeat. There was no way I could remove it by itself with my improvised bio-tinkering. Without the ability to do something similar to a traditional C-section, my only choice was essentially to do a hysterectomy. That meant I would need to take the entire womb and put that on life support. I could regenerate a replacement womb for Courtney afterward.

With that done, I could start the surgery. The main cut I did was a long side-to-side cut between the lower two abdominal muscles and the six above. That should let me cleanly pass the abs to reach the womb. Courtney briefly woke up after I made that cut, which was definitely not something I wanted. I knocked her back unconscious with the Medigun before making a few tweaks to it to make the unconsciousness deeper and then reapplied it.

Reassured that the patient wouldn't wake up, I started applying some clamps to keep the incision open and push the bladder out of the way. This gave me good access to the entire pelvic region. I took a break from the surgery to just look at things and mentally steel myself for the next part.

At that point, I pulled out this special knife I made. It had a very thin, very sharp blade that was heated so it would automatically cauterize any flesh it cut. I made a single long, but quick cut, separating the broad ligament, both ovarian ligaments, the uterine tubes, and then a last cut below the cervix. Even with the cauterization, there was still a fair amount of blood, not to mention other fluids leaking around, but with those cuts, I could pull the womb out softly as a single piece unattached to the rest of the body. I did so and tried to rush it into the life-support machine while still being careful with it.

As soon as I contained it within the life-support machine, I closed and activated the life-support machine. I took a break to steady my nerves at that point, but it wasn't really a break since I needed to watch the device and make a few corrections to make sure that it worked right. I'd have to come back and check on it probably once a day until it was ready for delivery, but that's just how parenting works. I realized that monitoring a child is a household problem, which quickly let me upgrade the exo-womb with a monitor that would notify me if I needed to make any corrections.

With that done, it was almost a cool down to remove the surgical equipment from Courtney. I dumped all of it into a steel crate. It technically should be all disposed of as medical waste, but I wanted to keep it in case it was useful in future tinkering. With all of my surgical gear removed, I could get to helping her recover by healing her. I started with the Medigun and once that had healed Courtney as much as possible; I cycled through the rest of Leet's healing equipment. Some of them needed adjustments to work, but none of them exploded in my hands like his devices are supposed to.

With her supposedly healed, I gave her a medical scan to check that the healing went correctly. The scans showed her in reasonable health, it even showed her teeth as being better than they were at the beginning and she had lost a few pounds of fat. Her blood sugar was low, but food should fix that. There was only one thing that I would say was bad, but it might be serious. Her uterus had regenerated incorrectly. I would need to do some research to figure out the specific effects, but it was overly entwined with the rest of the reproductive tract and the abdominal wall. It might still work, but that was a big if and it would be simpler to just heal her correctly.

While I was thinking over my options, my power tried to give me another power, and it actually succeeded this time. My new power let me build things with half the materials and sometimes ignore rare materials. My mind immediately leaped to the idea of experimenting with Mantic Core. Those are almost entirely composed of raw materials. How exactly would this thing work? Would it be that I build half of the device and then it's magically done or do I build a miniature version with half the materials and it resizes to full-size? My gut instinct is that it's actually a third option, where I simply know how to build the thing, but with fewer materials than I would expect it to take. That's too bad and seemed like it would be difficult to apply to my current problem. I was really excited about there being an exploit where you break a device down for materials and rebuild it repeatedly, but thinking about it made me realize I couldn't do that. From a resource perspective, it doesn't really matter, since I'm mostly not limited by the resources, but I can think of plenty of things that get better if you cut their weight in half. As an added bonus, I received a set of storage crates that could hold much more than would actually fit in their size.

My attempts to re-heal it didn't work very well. Most of my healing devices considered it plenty healed already, and the two that didn't seemed to make the problem worse. My next idea was to remove the deformed tissue and try to regenerate a new womb. If that didn't work, I would probably need to make a custom-built device. I had picked up a lot of medical skills from this experience so I could probably do it, but neither of those would be easy to do and neither could I do quickly, so neither seemed like something that I needed to do right away.

Waking up Courtney was as easy as switching the setting on the Medigun from sedate to accelerate. She almost leaped off the table which convinced me to turn off the Medigun. It took her a few seconds to wake up properly, before she looked at me and asked if it was a success.

"It was largely successful, but there were some complications." I said. "Right now, I need you to eat some food and drink some water to help your body recover. I want you to answer some questions about how you're feeling, so that I know what follow-up work you'll need."

Courtney gave a rundown of her post-surgery feelings. She had a bit of a stomachache but was otherwise feeling pretty good, which eventually led me to explain how the surgery went from my perspective.

"Essentially, the surgery was a success." I said. "I had to do a hysterectomy instead of a C-section, but the embryo and the surrounding womb are in that life-support unit I built. It should automatically alert me if I need to fix something, but I was also planning on checking on it once a day. As for complications, you've lost a few pounds which seems benign and there was some damage to your reproductive tract which healed incorrectly, but I should be able to fix that soon enough."

"It sounds like you screwed up." She said.

"It's certainly not perfect, but it's not really a screw-up, since I can fix it pretty easily." I said.

"I remember you promising to get Panacea if you screwed up." She said.

"If it was something urgent, then I would have gotten her, but I can fix this whenever we have some free time." I said.

"Doesn't matter. You screwed up, but you didn't get Panacea." She said.

"Yeah, but--" I said before she yelled over me.

"YOU SCREWED UP! AND YOU DIDN'T GET PANACEA!" She said.

"Fine, I'll call her right now." I said, relenting and pulling out the phone to call Panacea. It was like 10 AM on a Sunday, so she should be awake right now.

"Hi, Panacea." I said when I heard her pick up.

"Who is this?" She said. "I don't appreciate being cold-called by stalkers."

"Fortunately, I'm not a stalker." I said. "I'm actually Ponzi."

"Forget it, I don't do requests and I especially don't work for villains." She said.

"That's unfortunate. I have a friend that I did some surgical work on and there were some complications that she wants you to fix." I said.

The line was silent for a minute before she replied, "... you got into bio-tinkering?"

"Not much." I said. "It's just a little bit so far."

"Fine," she said, "if you come by our house with her at 1 PM, I'll do my best."

"Thanks in advance." I said, before hanging up.

Courtney was looking at me expectantly, so I told her what was up. "Panacea says she'll do her best if we show up at 1 PM. I'm pretty sure it's a trap, but I expect her to actually heal you."

"That's good." She said. "We just need to escape the trap after she heals me."

"It's a lot more work than it would be for me to just fix it on my own." I said.

She replied immediately. "Then you should've fixed it on your own."

It wasn't fun getting ready to walk into what was almost certainly a trap, but it was reasonably simple. Leet had most of the devices I would want to use for my daring escape, and I just needed a round of repair and testing to get me familiar with their principles and ensure they wouldn't break on me. In the meantime, I got confirmation that it was a trap when my spy systems told me about Armsmaster leaving the rig around 12:15 PM.

At 12:30 PM, we left for the Dallons' house. We were in one of Squealer's technicals. I had mostly gutted it at that point, with the weaponry and the advanced systems recycled into the last two Titans I made, but I needed an expendable vehicle and this one was easy to get running again with the parts from the garage. I had filled the truck bed with extra spare parts in case they might be useful. The drive also gave me plenty of time to explain the plan and the backup plan to Courtney. My crew was also using the time to put the finishing touches on the truck.

We parked in front of the Dallon's house around 12:55 PM. I sent Amy a text letting her know we were there. I was in my costume with full gear and Courtney was in some sundress with a jacket over it and a cloth mask. Courtney got out of the car and walked up to the door before knocking.

Panacea quickly opened the door and grabbed Courtney's wrist. They had a heated conversation, which I couldn't hear. I was busy tapping my enemy comms interceptor and hoping for it to activate.

After a minute of quiet conversation, Courtney looked at me and gave a thumbs up, which was apparently the signal for a lot of things to happen. Armsmaster's bike came around the corner in front of me, Glory Girl, Laser Dream, Shielder, and Photon Mom rose up behind me, Panacea ducked inside, and I stomped on the gas pedal.

Fortunately, I had a plan. I had given Courtney a teleportation beacon in her belt. I activated the matching teleportation pad underneath the passenger seat and as soon as Courtney reappeared in the seat I activated the truck's partial intangibility. It was useful. It meant I didn't need to worry about minor bumps. It was also useful in letting me go through grenades, like the foam one that Armsmaster just threw at me.

Armsmaster was smart enough to turn around and start chasing me, but I had prepared for that. I turned on the engine's boost and blasted down the street faster than was actually safe. I was probably at more risk of dying from my own car than Armsmaster at this point, but it was totally worth it, just to feel like I was driving a rollercoaster. Courtney didn't seem to be enjoying it, but she'll get over it.

By the time my boost was running low, I had probably crossed the entire subdivision the Dallons lived in. I couldn't see Armsmaster behind me, so I made the first turn I saw, then made the first turn that would let me break line-of-sight with the road. My crew began immediately on disguising the truck and I felt they succeeded because I didn't see any pursuit on the long twisty path back to base. It was nice to have a plan A succeed.

I was rewarded when we got back to base by my power giving me the ability to never have to trade-off form and function when building. I probably wouldn't use it that much since time constraints are the real limit on how pretty I make my things right now, but it came with a secondary power that included knowledge of interior decorating, including how to place surveillance equipment, which would likely be more useful.

Spoiler: Celestial Forge Bookkeeping

Leftover wc: 496
Wordcount: 5777
Excess: 273

Saved 100 CP -> 200 CP total

Waste Not (Monster Hunter) 300:

You have found out a great secret in the blacksmithing trade - the reason that most blacksmiths usually ask for so many materials to make a certain weapon or armor isn't because its material intensive, but because they can make one for half of the materials and either sell the rest or make another to sell at a profit. The bastards! You have figured out how to use fewer materials to gain the same results when it comes to crafting your own weapons and armor. At first it may just be an ore or two less, but with enough practice you can reduce the amount of materials needed for a project by half (rounded down). As a bonus, with enough practice, you have a 50% chance to not require high-grade or legendary materials (Rubied, Plates, etc) to make an item, provided you can supplement the build with excess materials.

Weapon & Item Storage Chest (Monster Hunter) Free:

An absolute must whether you're an aspiring hunter or roving trader. You get two chests - the first one can store up to 1000 individual weapons, pieces of armor, and charm talismans, while the second can store up to 1000 stacks of 999 of any given healing item, monster part, ore, or item that isn't a weapon, armor piece, or talisman.

Decadence (Dune, 100 CP):

You have the skills to sacrifice neither form nor function when you design, create, or arrange things, which is especially important in a society whose upper crust values opulence the way this society does -- after all, the Emperor's throne is carved out of a single massive gemstone. Whether it's interior decorating, crafting a knife or sword, building furniture or a vehicle... you can make it appeal perfectly to the most crass or the upper crust. You can also figure out the optimal decor for any purpose or environment, which includes the best places to hide discreet surveillance devices.

Spoiler: Author's Note

Aside from Jaime's interlude, these two documents were helpful when writing this.

docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/17FpxEH6ueuftNMq2ARNPTethBHDY_QhcfvBIynQgIZM/htmlview#

docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1aHyZ7c7TIgt903mPinOakrgli2WZu5IRtiGYPCnCqDE/htmlview#

 

[Tournament of course]

That came out of left field that she's pregnant. Like wtf?!?

 

[Sono]

Were the Unwritten Rules ever brought up in canon beyond the one point when Tattletale mentioned them? You know, before going on to violate them right away at their very next crime when she started hurting Amy with those details of her non-Cape life that were supposed to be off limits according to said rules?

Click to shrink...

Panacea used her powers, hence she counted as a combatant cape at that point. Past that, they're violated often but that's specifically a violation, and remarked as such. They're also applied to Endbringer fights, and the reason Weaver gets a new identity. It's all the rules, working as intended.

They're very much a thing, and you only break them when you can get away undetected. If people know you broke them, your ass is grass.

Courtney was looking at me expectantly, so I told her what was up. "Panacea says she'll do her best if we show up at 1 PM. I'm pretty sure it's a trap, but I expect her to actually heal you."

Click to shrink...

That's... More awareness than I was expecting at this point.

That came out of left field that she's pregnant. Like wtf?!?

Click to shrink...

They've been fucking this entire time. It can happen even if you use protection, which I'm not sure they did. Not that strange, really.

 

[NakedFury]

That came out of left field that she's pregnant. Like wtf?!?

Click to shrink...

Well they have sex pretty much any time he can so it was bound to happen.

 

[012345]

She replied immediately. "Then you should've fixed it on your own."

Click to shrink...

I know she just whines but it sounds as she would prefer for Ponzi to keep her sedated untill he managed to heal her right. No matter how long it took.

Also we know that his name is Steve.