The Skittering Chaos (Worm/Hazbin Hotel)

[Deathwings]

So Alistor look for her, there is no reason why he would even look in Taylor's direction. Unless he was in the bar when she made her declaration and wants to offer the tools to acquire real power and become corrupt while regretful at the same of the things she did, you know fun.

Unfortunate for she din't have the slighest idea of who he is and was personally responsible in the destroy the previous status quo of the Overlords and allow new players to rise.

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Alastor hates Valentino, I think ? So Taylor was an opportunity to annoy the guy.

 

[Night Hunter]

Alastor hates Valentino, I think ? So Taylor was an opportunity to annoy the guy.

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She is small fly for now, there are other people to battle Valentino that are in a better position than her.

 

[Thread Necromancer]

Alastor hates Valentino, I think ? So Taylor was an opportunity to annoy the guy.

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He hates Vox, and Valentino is one of Vox's buddies, but there is more to what Alastor wants, and really, the deal wasn't particularly what he wanted, but rather a side show as he set up something more entertaining.

 

[Qaw]

So Alistor look for her, there is no reason why he would even look in Taylor's direction. Unless he was in the bar when she made her declaration and wants to offer the tools to acquire real power and become corrupt while regretful at the same of the things she did, you know fun.

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Actually, it is vitally important for any A Class mastermind character to do the meet&greet with all potential players and upsets at least once. That way you don't get blindsided later down the line. Watching recordings and sending minions to spy and report can work in a pinch, but it can't replace seeing the face and asking a couple questions when it comes to constructing a mental model of the person. (But then most media like to immediately jump to S Class masterminds *coughContessacough* without any skill to write them, so that is an easy thing to miss.)

Did ThreadNecromancer have this reasoning in mind when he wrote the scene? Probably not, but it's in the story now, and is now undoubtedly one of the goals Alastor had from this meeting.

 

[SystemSearcher]

Actually, it is vitally important for any A Class mastermind character to do the meet&greet with all potential players and upsets at least once. That way you don't get blindsided later down the line. Watching recordings and sending minions to spy and report can work in a pinch, but it can't replace seeing the face and asking a couple questions when it comes to constructing a mental model of the person. (But then most media like to immediately jump to S Class masterminds *coughContessacough* without any skill to write them, so that is an easy thing to miss.)

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There's also the fact that Alastor is just plain bored so I wouldn't be surprised if he literally just randomly bumped into her while looking over the general infernopolitical landscape. He does not make any true plans, after all, he mostly just fucks with people.

 

[TitaniumQuartz971]

I also have the sneaking suspicion that he wants Stolas' Grimoire so he can chat with a certain time-locked omnicide-igniter.

 

[Dariusz]

We're you inspired by paranoid dj's smile like you mean it recent mv? Cause when reading this I got flashbacks to it for some reason.

 

[Arbitbit39]

So... what'll happen if Danny saw his dead wife and daughter would he considered suicide or murder... though i can see both of them getting annoyed by it

 

[LZB1285]

"But we all know that Valentino doesn't take kindly to those who encroach on his turf, and we are rather close to it," Valentino continues,

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I wasn't aware that Alastor was able to shapeshift in this fashion. I hope Taylor's taking notes.

 

[Thread Necromancer]

We're you inspired by paranoid dj's smile like you mean it recent mv? Cause when reading this I got flashbacks to it for some reason.

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No really, I mainly just looked at when Alastor first showed up in the pilot and based it off of that, though my memories made it so that I imagined that his smile glowed as well, like a radio starting up.

I also have the sneaking suspicion that he wants Stolas' Grimoire so he can chat with a certain time-locked omnicide-igniter.

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It was certainly Stolas' Grimoire, and he definitely does want to talk to someone up top.

So... what'll happen if Danny saw his dead wife and daughter would he considered suicide or murder... though i can see both of them getting annoyed by it

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Or taking up demon summoning.

 

[Arbitbit39]

Or taking up demon summoning

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Is it odd that I can see him founding a cult... also I can imagine both of Taylor and Annette cringed from the possibility

 

[Tortoise]

Spoiler: grammar

Instead, I simply raise my leg up high enough to get it on stage before stepping onto it, as if stepping atop a large block rather than hoping on a stage.

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For that though, you'll need help, my help," Alastor said, his arms going out to emphasis his desire to "help" me.

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tense
emphasize

Believe me when I say that even with your bugs, you'd likely need to find a different way of taking on Valentino and either of his two fellow compatriots," the deer demon said as he got up from his chair and walked over to the map.

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tense

The map then further shifts to show various different territorial powers, with one called the demonic triumvirate being the largest colour compared to them all, even Satan had less territory than them, though his is far more centralised, and if what Adam said is true about what he could do, Satan could wipe out the whole city if the Pentragram floating above our heads is the super weapon that Adam implied it was.

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"But we all know that Valentino doesn't take kindly to those who encroach on his turf, and we are rather close to it," Valentino continues, pointing his staff towards the pink section of the map, right near the edge of it where a yellow splotch had grown to encompass where we live, the former Crimson gang's territory, and even the Raz family's territory.

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"Is that so? And what exactly are these favours you want?" I ask, well aware of how similar this was to how Cauldron liked to operate. Though usually the victim went to them, and asked for powers, rather than coming to you and obviously wanting something.

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Shouldn't the comparison be with Cauldron coming to you? (Instead of "victim" coming to you like the text now)

All the while a large red gem stuck out of the spine of it, glinting as hidden lights reflected off of it.

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It almost looks like some kind of futuristic drop ship, vaguely like some kind of VTOL with room in the back section for transporting cargo or troops like what the PRT will rarely use sometimes for rapid PRT squad and Protectorate hero deployments when movers aren't available to help us.

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Does she consider herself a current Protectorate hero? (to talk about "PRT will use it to help us")

"And when do you need this?" I ask, to which Alastor merely shrugged.

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tense

Demon's even those who used to be humans are natural trickers, and deal makers are usually the trickiest.

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Demons,
humans,
tricksters,

If Alastor wanted the book so bad, with his power he could easily just take it from them were it not for the possibility of the noble coming to take back his book.

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wants

Without any assurances on what favours he'd be cashing would be, how exactly can I trust that?

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what the favours he'd be cashing would be / what favours he'd be cashing

Then there was the fact that it was the classic deal makers move, to propose protection or something the person really wanted, in return for those favours.

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maker's

Meanwhile Alastor here merely wanted three favours, but those favours could be anything where as I know what I would be getting into with Valentino.

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whereas

can see you're not interested, well it's been a delight seeing your work but I must go, so many plans to put into place and all that, tata!"" he says with a playful lit in his voice before with a flourish of his staff and I hear the sound of radio static again.

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lilt

Staring at the woman, I can't help it as my gaze is drawn to her weapon, its energy wafting off of it, drawing my attention like a moth to flame.

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Magic emanates off of her clothing in ways I've never seen done before, but then I don't have much of a reference.

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Her feathers are black and white, a cape flowing off of her back matching those feathers, but I doubt that it's actually just a cape as I can also feel power coming from her.

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My evil clones had finally found me down here. I'd hoped that something had dealt with them, or that they'd ended up elsewhere.

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tense

At least it's only two of them form the looks of it.

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The other clone is different, and I'm pretty sure she was the one which had been the rat controlling one, Scurry.

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remove / the one which was

Unlike her more demonic looking friend, this girl's face was only just a bit different with large incisors peaking out of her mouth and a gnarled twist of a nose.

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I watch as the owl demons eyes light up, her smile widening she can't help but give her biggest grin.

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demon's
punctuation?

I don't actually know if this woman really is Mom or just some imposter that the clones had hired to pretend.

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Empowered as I am, I might only have to worry about the laser weapons, and with the power of the Beast, I could escape faster then they could correct their aim.

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But what if this is Mom, had the clones taken what my response into account.

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During one of the monthly phone calls me and Dad had, the phone calls were we tried to fix our distant relationship, and try to grow closer, like we both wanted.

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Dad hadn't gone in on the details, but he had mentioned that Mom had said it'd had something to do with a dildo ladder, whatever that was.

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One of the girl's parent's had convinced her to press charges, and for a time Mom was in jail for a bit, but got out on bail pretty soon after and even back into the university because of her connections to Lustrum's main sorority and the influence it had at the time before the whole movement came crashing down with Lustrum's arrest.

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parents

It was during one of Dad's visits to me while I was in Prison.

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Above she talks about phonecall, but says "visit" here?
prison.

We all went through it. I'm not going to say what it was… but… to say the least, they weren't exactly legal… and… well, some girl squealed about it to her parents on year.

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I feel my eyes begin to get wet as I take a deep breath and breath it out, trying to calm myself, but I can feel my eyes growing wetter as I continue.

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breathe

"I-I missed," I have to breath in as my breath catches a moment before I continue. "I missed you."

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breathe

I hear Mom sniffle as well below me, and hugs me tighter, possibly seeking comfort in my larger form.

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Some might I was cheated for not ending up in Heaven, after saving so many worlds, but could it have really been my Heaven, if none of my friends or family were there?

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[Telegraph Nine]

Okay, so reactions: (I read this when it first got posted, but... procrastination.)

I turn, and among the carnage there is a very well dressed demon standing there, his eyes and smile practically glowing in the dim warehouse light. Spread across his face is a wide and glowing yellow sharp toothed smile which nearly split the demon's face in twain and reached up towards the demon's eyes. His eyes themselves have that same soft glow as his teeth, only in red. Along with his eyes, he has a red tinted monocle hovering by his left eye and connected to a chain that slides into his hair. From there I see how his hair is an unkempt mess, not at all helped by his rather large ears which blend into his hair, and the horns which are easily missed at a first glance. Likely without going to a salon down here, the way he has it pushed to the side, letting the oil in it keep it somewhat rigid is the best he could likely do as a man unskilled in hair sculpting. The snappy clothes I'd noticed before being drawn to his unnervingly large smile are the colour of very ripe strawberries, with the colour only being broken up by thin vertical red stripes that are lighter than the rest of his suit. In addition, the suit practically looked like it had padded shoulders from how it stuck outwards from him, giving him a rather exaggerated silhouette. In his gloved hands, he also holds what looks like an archaic microphone which glows with magical power. Were it not for how messy his hair was, he'd look refined rather than someone playing at being refined.

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I really enjoy this story, but as a writer, this description does not work well at all. I understand wanting to introduce Alastor to readers who may only be familiar with the Worm side of the cross, but writing and visual media fundamentally work on different sets of rules. Directly copying over every detail of a drawn character design into words doesn't create the same impression as being able to see the image. In the show, you can take in all the details at a glance. In writing, it brings the entire story to a screeching halt as you try to cover all of them, and many create entirely different impressions when they're explicitly called out. (The shoulder pads and messy hair, for example, make him sound buffoonish.)

I would suggest next time focusing on what impression you want the character to give, and then picking around three-ish details that evoke that concept. Is Alastor supposed to come across as creepy? Suave? Eccentric? If you pick a few visual elements that give and evocative place to start, the reader's imagination will do the rest in creating a mental image.

(...I hope this doesn't come off as rude, you just seem like someone who's really interested in improving at the craft of writing, and this is honestly a pretty easy fix. That said, feel free not take my unsolicited advice if you want. I'll enjoy the story either way.)

In an instant, the world shifts as the hum of radio static bombards me at full force a moment before it quickly resolves and we are suddenly sitting in rather comfy and plush seats. My antennae twitch as I feel around us while I look, seeing we are still in the warehouse. It had been… two major magical spells at work here, done with just the snap of his fingers. First he pulled out chairs and the table between us from somewhere, teleported us both to be sitting on the chairs, all in an instant.

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I honestly thought she was going to be invited for a radio interview at this point.

With a wave of his staff, Alastor changes the map, shifting it from showing a small localised area to a map showing off the whole city. The map then further shifts to show various different territorial powers, with one called the demonic triumvirate being the largest colour compared to them all, even Satan has less territory than them, though his is far more centralised, and if what Adam said is true about what he could do, Satan could wipe out the whole city if the pentagram floating above our heads is the super weapon that Adam implied it was.

"You see, you're getting into the prostitution business, and what a fine business it is, a wonderful way of letting the poor rise by selling their dignity, their honour, and their body, all for a cheap buck. Yessiree! No better way for them to rise down here. Those notions are rather cheap and are not long for this fiery world I fear, with the body being the only thing left to sell of any value after they fall down to this little pit," Alastor says.

"But we all know that Valentino doesn't take kindly to those who encroach on his turf, and we are rather close to it," Alastor continues, pointing his staff towards the pink section of the map, right near the edge of it where a yellow splotch has grown to encompass where we live, the former Crimson gang's territory, and even the Raz family's territory. On the yellow I can see a little moth silhouette on there as well, obviously indicating that it was us.

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...Honestly kind of disappointed Taylor didn't think to snap a picture of this version of the map with her phone like she did the original one. I mean, yeah, it would have been rude and risked annoying Alastor and probably a bad idea all around, but that kind of information seems really valuable.

"Three favours no more, no less. While I don't know exactly what I might want from you for all three, I do know of one thing you could do for me," Alastor said as the illusion changed, turning from a map, into a book, no, a grimoire. The navy blue book had gold etching all over it, with a stylised crescent moon on the front and an array of symbols in the midst of the crescent. All the while a large red gem stuck out of the spine of it, glinting as hidden lights reflected off the gem.

"There is this book that belongs to one of the nobles in Hell, I merely desire it for a day, and right now, the noble that has this book has gone and lent it out to a small group of imps. For that first favour, retrieve it for me, and after that, you can even have the book afterwards,"

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It's a testament to your ability as a storyteller that I honestly though Taylor was going to take the deal for a second when it was first played out. With the meta knowledge of who Stolas is and how much trouble he can bring it would have been a very bad move, but Taylor doesn't know any of that, and it would have moved the plot forward in a dramatic way. And making bad decisions isn't exactly unknown for her.

I do think refusing might have been a first step to eventually dealing with Alastor on a more even level, though. This is more headcanon than real analysis since we only have one episode to go on, but I suspect Alastor couldn't ever respect someone who fell for one of his bargains on the first try. I mean, obviously he did want what he was asking for from Taylor, but seeing whether she took the bate may also been a test on some level.

The owl demon is garbed in some kind of latex suit; it perfectly hugs her figure while leaving her feathered arms free. The way the latex clings to her honestly makes me jealous of her as it hugs her in a way similar to Lisa's, accentuating every curve she has and distracting all those who gaze upon her. Her breasts perfectly framed by the suit while her thighs are almost accentuated by those thin birdlike legs. She had the kind of figure that I'd always expected to have, a tight, healthy and toned body that was pleasant on the eyes.

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I wonder if Taylor will be embarrassed to realize, after, that it was her mom she was having those thoughts about. I mean she didn't know, but still, damn.

For a moment I look up to the sky, and am able to see the white moon over the red one, the moon with a halo, and clouds orbiting it. Some might say I was cheated for not ending up in Heaven, after saving so many worlds, but could it have really been my Heaven, if none of my friends or family were there? I squeeze on Mom some more as I lower my head once more and nuzzle into Mom's feathers.

Maybe, but I doubt it.

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This is the Undersiders all over again, isn't it? The choice to be a hero and alone, or to go to the dark side and have people who care about her. I'd specify what point in canon I'm talking about, but honestly it almost doesn't matter. For Taylor, having people to be close too has always meant compromising her morals or being on the wrong side of the law.

It's fitting that the same thing applies to heaven or hell. This is the girl who originally became a villain out of sheer loneliness, after all. And after the events of Worm, she's chosen pretty well which path she wants to take.

I also have the sneaking suspicion that he wants Stolas' Grimoire so he can chat with a certain time-locked omnicide-igniter.

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Jack does seem like the most likely candidate, yeah. Though depending on how you interpret his interactions with Charlie in the pilot, Alastor could have a thing for leading those with noble intentions down the path to hell. So it could be he's after someone (self)rightious who's setting out to do good and desperate enough to make a deal.

It's probably not someone with a strong power, though. Or at least not because of said power. I wondered if it might be Amy for a second before remembering that in hell she'd be just another soul without any special abilities.

 

[VisV]

Hmmm... actually come to think of it.

Taylor just got repeated looks at Alastor's Teleporting magic stuff...

Thread Necromancer Any chance she's gonna be adding her own version of that to her repertoire of tricks?

 

[Thread Necromancer]

I really enjoy this story, but as a writer, this description does not work well at all. I understand wanting to introduce Alastor to readers who may only be familiar with the Worm side of the cross, but writing and visual media fundamentally work on different sets of rules. Directly copying over every detail of a drawn character design into words doesn't create the same impression as being able to see the image. In the show, you can take in all the details at a glance. In writing, it brings the entire story to a screeching halt as you try to cover all of them, and many create entirely different impressions when they're explicitly called out. (The shoulder pads and messy hair, for example, make him sound buffoonish.)

I would suggest next time focusing on what impression you want the character to give, and then picking around three-ish details that evoke that concept. Is Alastor supposed to come across as creepy? Suave? Eccentric? If you pick a few visual elements that give and evocative place to start, the reader's imagination will do the rest in creating a mental image.

(...I hope this doesn't come off as rude, you just seem like someone who's really interested in improving at the craft of writing, and this is honestly a pretty easy fix. That said, feel free not take my unsolicited advice if you want. I'll enjoy the story either way.)

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Thank you very much, I hadn't thought of that but you're certainly right, and it makes sense. I've always just written out all the details as if it were some description from CoC but that makes far more sense. I'll need to include that in the rework as well. Also, doesn't come off as rude at all and I actually quite enjoy some of the critique especially as I feel as if I've become a bit rusty on the less pornographic context due to simply writing so much of it and focusing less and less on my non porno fics and snippets.

I honestly thought she was going to be invited for a radio interview at this point.

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My original draft had it as an interview, and now that I think back to it, I don't know why I didn't keep that. My best guess is that for some reason I was worried about word count or something like that... not sure really. I do plan on changing it to more of the interview as when I gave the chapter a sober second thought and read the critique, I definitely need to improve it and explain some other parts, such as why Alastor is so interested in Taylor despite, like Angel Dust, isn't too interested in politics outside of causing chaos

(Lets be honest, when everything is falling apart, and going to shit, it's a hell of a riot!)

It's a testament to your ability as a storyteller that I honestly though Taylor was going to take the deal for a second when it was first played out. With the meta knowledge of who Stolas is and how much trouble he can bring it would have been a very bad move, but Taylor doesn't know any of that, and it would have moved the plot forward in a dramatic way. And making bad decisions isn't exactly unknown for her.

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To be fair, it is a very good deal to have, especially were Taylor not to have her "totally not a sharingan" abilities she gained upon becoming a Moth demon. If you don't have to worry about the boss coming an attacking you while you mop up their fodder (and hopefully not die while fighting the mobs) then it certainly makes a fight easier.

I wonder if Taylor will be embarrassed to realize, after, that it was her mom she was having those thoughts about. I mean she didn't know, but still, damn.

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With out a doubt.

(lewd non canon chapter for the eventual lewd version ahoy~!)

Alastor could have a thing for leading those with noble intentions down the path to hell.

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It's not just the pilot but also in Alastor's comic as well where he saves a lamb from being slaughtered by going horror show on the pig that was going to butcher the lamb, and got himself some nice pork to eat. Alastor also seems to have a rather gentlemanly nature about himself, and is easily able to walk the streets unmolested, or is even greeted kindly sometimes. It's rather contrasting with Vaggie's impression of him, but that could just be Vaggie.

He and Vox certainly hate each other though, with Vox specifically when Alastor was watching a TV through a window, suddenly appeared in all the TVs of the shop just to stare down Alastor. I assume Alastor is able to do the same thing only with Radio and radio signals.

Any chance she's gonna be adding her own version of that to her repertoire of tricks?

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Part of why I had it that Taylor focused so hard on it. Super speed is nice and all, but teleportation is better so long as you are able to re orientate yourself quickly.

 

[Qaw]

My original draft had it as an interview, and now that I think back to it, I don't know why I didn't keep that. My best guess is that for some reason I was worried about word count or something like that... not sure really. I do plan on changing it to more of the interview as when I gave the chapter a sober second thought and read the critique, I definitely need to improve it and explain some other parts, such as why Alastor is so interested in Taylor despite, like Angel Dust, isn't too interested in politics outside of causing chaos

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So, any chance to actually get the updated version here? I know you don't tend to edit your posts, but between the spelling mistakes and the extra content you might be adding it'd be a pain to have to switch to SB to read it again.

To be fair, it is a very good deal to have, especially were Taylor not to have her "totally not a sharingan" abilities she gained upon becoming a Moth demon. If you don't have to worry about the boss coming an attacking you while you mop up their fodder (and hopefully not die while fighting the mobs) then it certainly makes a fight easier.

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I don't see that though. Stolas aside, she is not currently in conflict with any big wig, and taking the deal had the implication of immediate hostility, where otherwise she might get a couple months to consolidate her territory, reunite with her friends, and learn magic&shit.
And you're gonna have to spell out to me how having multiple favors owed to an Overlord is a good deal when you don't even have a handle on their disposition. Or even what exactly owing a 'favor' means. Maybe you do understand that as the author, and maybe Taylor has instinctual demon knowledge, but from the outside it might easily be a near-inescapable loss condition.

Also, I was always curious how much of Taylor's quick learning was due to her being a moth. Because if all moths are terrifying learners, the old timers would be aware of that.

I really enjoy this story, but as a writer, this description does not work well at all. I understand wanting to introduce Alastor to readers who may only be familiar with the Worm side of the cross, but writing and visual media fundamentally work on different sets of rules. Directly copying over every detail of a drawn character design into words doesn't create the same impression as being able to see the image. In the show, you can take in all the details at a glance. In writing, it brings the entire story to a screeching halt as you try to cover all of them, and many create entirely different impressions when they're explicitly called out. (The shoulder pads and messy hair, for example, make him sound buffoonish.)

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as if it were some description from CoC

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Yeah.... I don't know if that is a good skill to have. It looks like good critique, but one one (me) does not even think to give because one is already accustomed to auto-skipping all the descriptions.
As someone who played CoC some, the amount of dreck text there is retarded.

This is the Undersiders all over again, isn't it? The choice to be a hero and alone, or to go to the dark side and have people who care about her. I'd specify what point in canon I'm talking about, but honestly it almost doesn't matter. For Taylor, having people to be close too has always meant compromising her morals or being on the wrong side of the law.

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In this case, more like musings then a choice. Nobody's offering Taylor a ticket to Heaven.

Jack does seem like the most likely candidate, yeah. Though depending on how you interpret his interactions with Charlie in the pilot, Alastor could have a thing for leading those with noble intentions down the path to hell. So it could be he's after someone (self)rightious who's setting out to do good and desperate enough to make a deal.

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I doubt it. Jack is pretty boring as a person, and his story is complete anyway. There's little to discuss with him.
I almost hope Alastor has an eye for someone who isn't a character in Worm/Ward. Some news host or something.

Oh, and Telegraph Nine, if you want more on Alastor character, his wiki page has links to like 30 different multi-hour lore shows. I haven't watched them, but hey, they technically exist.

My original draft had it as an interview, and now that I think back to it, I don't know why I didn't keep that. My best guess is that for some reason I was worried about word count or something like that... not sure really. I do plan on changing it to more of the interview as when I gave the chapter a sober second thought and read the critique, I definitely need to improve it and explain some other parts, such as why Alastor is so interested in Taylor despite, like Angel Dust, isn't too interested in politics outside of causing chaos

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I'd like to second Telegraph Nine here, I thought so as well. I'd be neat, but my Watsonian explanation is that Alastor intended to do one thing, and then suddenly found himself pressed for time and scrambling.

 

[Thread Necromancer]

So, any chance to actually get the updated version here? I know you don't tend to edit your posts, but between the spelling mistakes and the extra content you might be adding it'd be a pain to have to switch to SB to read it again.

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I'll be posting it here, no worries, though I usually stealth edit if it's only minor like the grammar stuff I already fixed.

 

[Night Hunter]

"Hello there my good mademoiselle! Hello! Mighty fine work you pulled off here with those gang bangers. Were I humble I'd say that I couldn't have done it better myself, but then even when arriving in this place I had a bit more experience than most in the ways of magic, and less allies to care about.

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I don't think Alistor would call them gangbangers, he would probably call them unrefined criminals or something fancy like that.

you're gonna have to spell out to me how having multiple favors owed to an Overlord is a good deal when you don't even have a handle on their disposition. Or even what exactly owing a 'favor' means. Maybe you do understand that as the author, and maybe Taylor has instinctual demon knowledge, but from the outside it might easily be a near-inescapable loss condition.

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Taylor don't know Alistor was a Overlord much less a very infamous on, or that he wanted her to steal from nobility. At best she thinks he is someone powerful but not what exactly.

She probably going to be really glad to not having take the deal once someone explain what he was or the world of trouble she was going to be on.

 

[Qaw]

Taylor don't know Alistor was a Overlord much less a very infamous on, or that he wanted her to steal from nobility. At best she thinks he is someone powerful but not what exactly.

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Witnessing his power, the assumption isn't far-fetched. But fine, even taking that out, what difference does that make if he's an Overlord or not? Owing two unspecified favors to a powerful unknown is foolish no matter how you spin it. Especially when you're at a high point.
PS: Unless, again, favors owed have some strict limitations built into them.

 

[Telegraph Nine]

He and Vox certainly hate each other though, with Vox specifically when Alastor was watching a TV through a window, suddenly appeared in all the TVs of the shop just to stare down Alastor. I assume Alastor is able to do the same thing only with Radio and radio signals.

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I have some fairly fleshed-out headcanons about Valentino and Vox and their respective powers. If you're still trying to figure out what they can do, I'd be happy to share them in a DM or something? I don't know for sure if they're fully compliant with all the various author streams, but they could be a place to start if you'd find that helpful.

(If not that's okay, of course. You may already know what you want to do with them.)

 

[Night Hunter]

Witnessing his power, the assumption isn't far-fetched. But fine, even taking that out, what difference does that make if he's an Overlord or not? Owing two unspecified favors to a powerful unknown is foolish no matter how you spin it. Especially when you're at a high point.
PS: Unless, again, favors owed have some strict limitations built into them.

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Taylor don't actually have the best track record in making responsible choices, the whole mess of Worm started because she appoint herself as a undercover agent of Armmaster despite the guy spell out to her that not only is a bad idea but he don't want that. Not only that but at least accord to Vaggie dealmakers have a bad reputation and if going by typical "deal with the devil" no matter how much limitations you put is always going to be turned against you and Alistor is a master of this craft.

 

[SystemSearcher]

Taylor don't actually have the best track record in making responsible choices, the whole mess of Worm started because she appoint herself as a undercover agent of Armmaster despite the guy spell out to her that not only is a bad idea but he don't want that. Not only that but at least accord to Vaggie dealmakers have a bad reputation and if going by typical "deal with the devil" no matter how much limitations you put is always going to be turned against you and Alistor is a master of this craft.

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There is a reason why even Charlie didn't accept a deal from Alastor, instead all but forcing him to accept her deal.

 

[Qaw]

Taylor don't actually have the best track record in making responsible choices, the whole mess of Worm started because she appoint herself as a undercover agent of Armmaster despite the guy spell out to her that not only is a bad idea but he don't want that. Not only that but at least accord to Vaggie dealmakers have a bad reputation and if going by typical "deal with the devil" no matter how much limitations you put is always going to be turned against you and Alistor is a master of this craft.

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Author: Stolas aside, the deal isn't actually terrible.
Me: It is though.
You: Taylor didn't know he was an Overlord.
Me: That changes very little.
You: Taylor makes bad choices.

This is either you agreeing with my point while still making it seem like you're arguing with me, or you haven't followed the chain.

 

[Night Hunter]

Author: Stolas aside, the deal isn't actually terrible.
Me: It is though.
You: Taylor didn't know he was an Overlord.
Me: That changes very little.
You: Taylor makes bad choices.

This is either you agreeing with my point while still making it seem like you're arguing with me, or you haven't followed the chain.

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Well it's the same as a Cauldron deal, itself is not bad but when comes to honour your part of the agreedment when things get messy.

Taylor still is a newcomer in hell so there is a lot of things she don't know and pretty she would not even consider Alistor deal if she knew his reputation.

 

[Qaw]

Well it's the same as a Cauldron deal, itself is not bad but when comes to honour your part of the agreedment when things get messy.

Taylor still is a newcomer in hell so there is a lot of things she don't know and pretty she would not even consider Alistor deal if she knew his reputation.

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You'd need the reputation of a saint to make two unspecified favors and provoking a conflict with a strong faction at the time you should be consolidating forces instead seem 'not bad'.

 

[Night Hunter]

You'd need the reputation of a saint to make two unspecified favors and provoking a conflict with a strong faction at the time you should be consolidating forces instead seem 'not bad'.

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Depending if the guy is offering something you really want or is really desperate and willing to take the chance in getting indebt for someone you don't know.

 

[Qaw]

Depending if the guy is offering something you really want or is really desperate and willing to take the chance in getting indebt for someone you don't know.

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That sure is a true general statement.
But since we are obviously talking about something very specific, I find both of these conditions to be unmet here.
But please, do make a case for them. Because so far I've read a claim, but no actual argument.

 

[Thread Necromancer]

I've now updated chapter 21, pretty much reworking the first part with Alastor. Give it a read if you like.

 

[Ngamer11]

I've now updated chapter 21, pretty much reworking the first part with Alastor. Give it a read if you like.

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I really like the update to the chapter. It shows off more of Alastor's power and shows that he's really doing this simply because it interests him. I hope Taylor will agree to the interview in the future. Most of the capes who died in the Golden Morning will probably shit themselves when that's broadcasted.

 

[Qaw]

Looks good. I like the rewrite.

And the interview at some point sounds like a fun scene. I'd ask how Taylor would get in touch with Alastor again, but she'd just need to get a radio and say his name three times in all likelihood.

The Demon cast off a presence that demanded attention, like a fire cracker going off in the night sky, the magical energy wafting off of him had my antennae buzzing and shaking in his presence, like a kid high on sugar. Other than his unkempt hair, the deer demon stood appearing civilised in the field of gore he stood in, completely at home among it, with his rouge suit, and eyes that glowed. His smile is filled with sharp, predatory teeth, and combined with his glowing red eyes; I can't help myself as I raise my guns at him, my bugs already moving towards us. His tall, thin figure, combined with his obvious power and total focus on me as he stands there with that too wide a smile, those too large eyes, the radio static slowly diminishing.

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