Mr Zoat
Dedicated ragequitter
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- Dec 1, 2016
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28th January
13:20 GMT -5
"Now hang-!"
My rings flare, and the orange light burns through whatever arcane defences he had active so quickly that I barely feel the resistance. I'm not sure whether that's due to his defences being weak, his nature being so filled with avarice that he couldn't resist the orange light effectively or… My own ability. Orange light radiates from his forehead, then dims to the weakly glowing brand.
His eyes roll upwards as he tries to see what I've just done, then he tries to raise his hands in order to feel it. But they're still trapped.
"Orange Lantern?" I glance back at Robert, and he points downwards. "People are staring."
I nod. "Thank you for pointing that out. This way."
I fly myself and my captive west and upwards, bringing us out of easy visual distance of the road. The second to last thing I want to do is create a massive crash.
Buzz gives up trying to see his own forehead. "What is this?"
"Essentially, it makes it trivially easy for me to alter your desires. If I want to, I can totally reshape your personality."
"Fuck me, you sure you're a superhero?"
"Hero, villain, I'm the man with the ring. Now." I lean in a little closer. Though just for effect; I'm not stupid enough to get close enough for him to do anything. "You want to be open and honest with me-"
He blinks. "Was that supposed to be a magic word or something? Because as a demon coming up to the end of his second millennium I gotta say, you need more pizzazz. Half of magic is-."
"-regarding your recent criminal activity here in Virginia."
"That's not exactly a short list, mate."
"The Devil Jizz."
He shakes his head. "Never touched the stuff. I was on Earth when my old boss got done in by the First-."
"Your old boss being?"
"Beelzebub. Miserable bastard that he was. Here, you didn't have anything to do with that, did you? No one I asked could give me the full story."
"The First did.. something to him in retaliation for Satanus giving Sabbac the Sword of the Fallen. Satanus took advantage of his weakness to steal his power in a more permanent way. What did he have on you?"
"He offered to help me assassinate Emperor Caligula and ensure my wife's safety in exchange for eternal servitude. Then that thing in Fawcett happened and the bond just vanished."
"You couldn't disobey him in the intervening period?"
"Basically, no." He tries to shrug. "I could creatively interpret, and he wasn't giving me orders every day, but when it came right down to it… He was the boss."
And just like that, we can't convict him for anything before Fawcett. Mind control, which is a near-absolute defence even if the subject initially volunteered.
"The Devil Jizz."
"Answer hasn't changed, mate. I've been out of the loop since Beelzebub snuffed it. Don't even know how it's made. I mean, I can guess roughly what's in it, but I'm not part of the pipeline or nothin'."
"Your cult."
"Hah! Wouldn't call them a cult. Bunch of bravos and psychos. Not exactly hard to talk them into things."
"What were you doing with them?"
"Keeping me hand in. Passing time. Might a' done something with Linda… Then an angel dropped in me lap and I had to go for it. Didn't really work out like I intended."
"Why did you think that binding the two of them together would work out? A disempowered angel and a cultist?"
"What? No, I didn't bind them together. How the hell would that work? No, I just killed Noriel and used her death to transfer her knowledge into Linda. I figured her knowledge of magic and that would be useful. Turn Lindy into a real asset." He exhales. "Turns out, million year old angel has a slightly stronger personality than a teenager could handle. Used another spell t' try an' keep them apart, but now that you've countered that they're probably really mixed up right now."
Oh poop.
"So what happened to Noriel?"
"Body got burned up by the spell. Soul's probably gone back to the Silver City… Might have regained her memories, might not have done." He grins. "And I say 'probably', 'cause if she was down here, she's still be in the firing line for all that shit Excalibris got up to."
"If Linda only got Noriel's memories, why was she physically changing shape?"
"Dunno, really. Linda knew a little magic, Noriel knew a lot. Probably an instinctive thing. Wonder if they'll call themselves 'Lindel' or 'Nindel'..? No, 'Loriel', perfect." I narrow my eyes. "Like the shampoo."
"What other crimes have you personally committed recently?"
"Drugs, obviously. Resisting arrest. Maleficium."
"Grooming?"
"Doesn't bother me, but I think she was over sixteen when we started fucking. I mean, I'm two thousand years old, so-."
"The age of consent in Virginia is eighteen."
"Oh. Then yes. Kidnapping… Though the guy was a murderer. His mistress might not have been in on it."
"Did you murder them?"
"Nah. Got Linda to do it. Her parents took her to this one priest, see? Thought a growing girl might need moral guidance in this sinful age." He chuckles. "Only he was having an affair. Murdered his wife, played it for sympathy… Wasn't even that hard to prove it to Linda. Which helped out my whole 'morality is for the stupid' angle. Not exactly a tidy murder, but we've all got to start somewhere."
And if he's telling the truth about overwriting her brain then we can't charge her either. I suppose that we can at least locate the bodies and close the investigation.
"You can provide me with more details later, but-"
"Happy to!"
"-now I want to know where the Devil Jizz came from. You say you didn't supply it, but you must have been aware of it."
"Of course I was. See, the reason I wanted to kill Caligula was 'cause he raped me wife. Only I couldn't come at him openly without getting killed meself. Made the deal with Big B, she was safe… But she decided that 'cause I couldn't protect her it was my fault, an' she stabbed me to death. Beelzebub sorted me out, said I'd have the chance to win her over…"
"Because she'd go to Hell for murder. Not faithful to the gods of Rome, then?"
"Might have been Beelzebub's doing. Whatever: with him out of the picture I figured I could summon her up meself. Only her opinion on me hasn't gotten any better, has it?"
"Where is she now?"
"I dunno. That brothel of hers, maybe? She somehow wrangled being turned into a succubus-."
Oh dear.
"Orange Lantern to Doctor Fate, we have a problem."
…
"Doctor Fate?"
13:20 GMT -5
"Now hang-!"
My rings flare, and the orange light burns through whatever arcane defences he had active so quickly that I barely feel the resistance. I'm not sure whether that's due to his defences being weak, his nature being so filled with avarice that he couldn't resist the orange light effectively or… My own ability. Orange light radiates from his forehead, then dims to the weakly glowing brand.
His eyes roll upwards as he tries to see what I've just done, then he tries to raise his hands in order to feel it. But they're still trapped.
"Orange Lantern?" I glance back at Robert, and he points downwards. "People are staring."
I nod. "Thank you for pointing that out. This way."
I fly myself and my captive west and upwards, bringing us out of easy visual distance of the road. The second to last thing I want to do is create a massive crash.
Buzz gives up trying to see his own forehead. "What is this?"
"Essentially, it makes it trivially easy for me to alter your desires. If I want to, I can totally reshape your personality."
"Fuck me, you sure you're a superhero?"
"Hero, villain, I'm the man with the ring. Now." I lean in a little closer. Though just for effect; I'm not stupid enough to get close enough for him to do anything. "You want to be open and honest with me-"
He blinks. "Was that supposed to be a magic word or something? Because as a demon coming up to the end of his second millennium I gotta say, you need more pizzazz. Half of magic is-."
"-regarding your recent criminal activity here in Virginia."
"That's not exactly a short list, mate."
"The Devil Jizz."
He shakes his head. "Never touched the stuff. I was on Earth when my old boss got done in by the First-."
"Your old boss being?"
"Beelzebub. Miserable bastard that he was. Here, you didn't have anything to do with that, did you? No one I asked could give me the full story."
"The First did.. something to him in retaliation for Satanus giving Sabbac the Sword of the Fallen. Satanus took advantage of his weakness to steal his power in a more permanent way. What did he have on you?"
"He offered to help me assassinate Emperor Caligula and ensure my wife's safety in exchange for eternal servitude. Then that thing in Fawcett happened and the bond just vanished."
"You couldn't disobey him in the intervening period?"
"Basically, no." He tries to shrug. "I could creatively interpret, and he wasn't giving me orders every day, but when it came right down to it… He was the boss."
And just like that, we can't convict him for anything before Fawcett. Mind control, which is a near-absolute defence even if the subject initially volunteered.
"The Devil Jizz."
"Answer hasn't changed, mate. I've been out of the loop since Beelzebub snuffed it. Don't even know how it's made. I mean, I can guess roughly what's in it, but I'm not part of the pipeline or nothin'."
"Your cult."
"Hah! Wouldn't call them a cult. Bunch of bravos and psychos. Not exactly hard to talk them into things."
"What were you doing with them?"
"Keeping me hand in. Passing time. Might a' done something with Linda… Then an angel dropped in me lap and I had to go for it. Didn't really work out like I intended."
"Why did you think that binding the two of them together would work out? A disempowered angel and a cultist?"
"What? No, I didn't bind them together. How the hell would that work? No, I just killed Noriel and used her death to transfer her knowledge into Linda. I figured her knowledge of magic and that would be useful. Turn Lindy into a real asset." He exhales. "Turns out, million year old angel has a slightly stronger personality than a teenager could handle. Used another spell t' try an' keep them apart, but now that you've countered that they're probably really mixed up right now."
Oh poop.
"So what happened to Noriel?"
"Body got burned up by the spell. Soul's probably gone back to the Silver City… Might have regained her memories, might not have done." He grins. "And I say 'probably', 'cause if she was down here, she's still be in the firing line for all that shit Excalibris got up to."
"If Linda only got Noriel's memories, why was she physically changing shape?"
"Dunno, really. Linda knew a little magic, Noriel knew a lot. Probably an instinctive thing. Wonder if they'll call themselves 'Lindel' or 'Nindel'..? No, 'Loriel', perfect." I narrow my eyes. "Like the shampoo."
"What other crimes have you personally committed recently?"
"Drugs, obviously. Resisting arrest. Maleficium."
"Grooming?"
"Doesn't bother me, but I think she was over sixteen when we started fucking. I mean, I'm two thousand years old, so-."
"The age of consent in Virginia is eighteen."
"Oh. Then yes. Kidnapping… Though the guy was a murderer. His mistress might not have been in on it."
"Did you murder them?"
"Nah. Got Linda to do it. Her parents took her to this one priest, see? Thought a growing girl might need moral guidance in this sinful age." He chuckles. "Only he was having an affair. Murdered his wife, played it for sympathy… Wasn't even that hard to prove it to Linda. Which helped out my whole 'morality is for the stupid' angle. Not exactly a tidy murder, but we've all got to start somewhere."
And if he's telling the truth about overwriting her brain then we can't charge her either. I suppose that we can at least locate the bodies and close the investigation.
"You can provide me with more details later, but-"
"Happy to!"
"-now I want to know where the Devil Jizz came from. You say you didn't supply it, but you must have been aware of it."
"Of course I was. See, the reason I wanted to kill Caligula was 'cause he raped me wife. Only I couldn't come at him openly without getting killed meself. Made the deal with Big B, she was safe… But she decided that 'cause I couldn't protect her it was my fault, an' she stabbed me to death. Beelzebub sorted me out, said I'd have the chance to win her over…"
"Because she'd go to Hell for murder. Not faithful to the gods of Rome, then?"
"Might have been Beelzebub's doing. Whatever: with him out of the picture I figured I could summon her up meself. Only her opinion on me hasn't gotten any better, has it?"
"Where is she now?"
"I dunno. That brothel of hers, maybe? She somehow wrangled being turned into a succubus-."
Oh dear.
"Orange Lantern to Doctor Fate, we have a problem."
…
"Doctor Fate?"