Asheram
Know what you're doing yet?
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Never heard that nickname? He wields a halberd and has an iconic beard. Halbeard.
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Never heard that nickname? He wields a halberd and has an iconic beard. Halbeard.
Even so, she should have interrupted Taylor's next line with something to the effect of "Say nothing until your lawyer arrives."She didn't expect Armsmaster to just come out with the accusation.
Lung doesn't seem to exist in this AU.Never heard that nickname? He wields a halberd and has an iconic beard. Halbeard.
Never heard that nickname? He wields a halberd and has an iconic beard. Halbeard.
Yeah, I agree with this. Arnsmaster makes stupid mistakes, but this seems stretching it even for him.I agree with edale - Armsmaster was acting like he'd just taken stupid pills before entering the house.
Sure he's socially inept, but you don't get to being the local head of protectorate without at least some leadership skills and a dash of common sense.
She shouldn't have had the chance to admit to the crime in the first place before Sarah throws her hand over Taylor's mouth and tells her to say nothing until her lawyer (Carol) arrives. You already confirmed that she'll interrupt at the start of the next chapter anyway; just speed up her reaction time a bit.Wait, so not arresting someone who just admitted to a crime in front of him?
Wait, so not arresting someone who just admitted to a crime in front of him?
She shouldn't have had the chance to admit to the crime in the first place before Sarah throws her hand over Taylor's mouth and tells her to say nothing until her lawyer (Carol) arrives. You already confirmed that she'll interrupt at the start of the next chapter anyway; just speed up her reaction time a bit.
Ack has already rewritten it - see the SB and SV versions until he makes the edit here - but he only changed "ARREST NOW" to "Bring you in for questioning." It's not the change I would have made, which is only two lines earlier.Asking Ack to rewrite the chapter is going a wee bit too far Swift. Just because not everyone is behaving in a logical matter. Humans generally don't do that.
While I agree the scene seems a little forced, I'm willing to wait and see where Ack goes with it from here.
Ack has already rewritten it - see the SB and SV versions until he makes the edit here - but he only changed "ARREST NOW" to "Bring you in for questioning." It's not the change I would have made, which is only two lines earlier.
Actually, no.There's a time and place and Armsmaster has got to be politically savvy enough that New Wave wouldn't be having tea time with someone that just fire bombed a school..
"It's the politics," Colin spoke, leaning back, "I'm good at this. Better than most, if you don't mind me boasting. Everything I bring to the table, I worked my ass off for. But when it comes to shaking hands, managing people, navigating the bureaucracy… I'm not good at it, won't ever be. Because of that, I'm getting demoted, and I can probably give up on ever being in charge of another team."
Luckily, Taylor can't say anything as a dragon.Exceptions: Rachel, Bakuda
Also,wouldn't it make more sense for Carol to enter lawyer modewait, shit, Carol isn't there. Regardless, Sarah should've picked up enough of her sister's jargon over the years to tell Taylor to not say anything until Carol arrives.
Armsmaster would still want to arrest Taylor, of course, but this way she wouldn't admit to anything without a lawyer present.
"You're Taylor Hebert," he announced, surprise in his voice.
"I … yes, I am," I admitted.
"You blew up your locker at Winslow, damaged other lockers extensively, and set the school on fire."
"I, uh, did, I guess, yeah, but -"
His voice was grim. "In doing so, you endangered the lives of your fellow students. People could have died. I'm going to have to ask you to come in for questioning about this matter."
I heard Mrs Pelham's voice off to the side, but not what she was saying. My blood pounded in my ears. This time, I felt the change coming on. No, no, no, no -
Arms lengthened into wings, and membranes grew between my fingers and my arms. My t-shirt was gone, torn to shreds. My jeans – I was going through them at a phenomenal rate, just today – tore and split away from my growing tail, my changing legs. In just a few seconds, in my draconic form, I crouched before Armsmaster, mouth open and wings spread in an unconscious threat display. I couldn't roar, or perhaps I had not yet figured out how, but I was making a pretty loud noise anyway.
He reached behind his back, there were several rapid click-click noises, and his halberd was in his hands. It was perhaps the most versatile weapon in Brockton Bay. Everyone knew that it could cut through steel like soft butter. And he was threatening me with it.
"Stand down!" he shouted. "I will use all necessary force -"
Flame roiled in my gullet, my head dipped low, and I spat fire. Not the explosive fireball that had opened the locker for me, but a tight, controlled burst. Blue-white at the core, blue around the edges; it illuminated the room with actinic brightness. Armsmaster ducked away, but it wasn't aimed at him. When he next looked at his halberd, the head was simply gone, with just a drooping blob of metal at the tip. Behind him, a line of globs of molten metal sizzled on the lawn.
Stepping back carefully, I brought my wings in close to my body, and closed my mouth. Your move.
End of Part Four
Okay.
Before anyone makes any more comments, this is the passage in question as it stands. Read it before making any more comments.
Without more practice with her powers, everything she seems to be doing with them appears to be base instinct.Taylor also seems to be flipping back and forth mentally between instinct and reason pretty fast.
Armsmaster is standing on the doorstep. He can't see anyone but Taylor and maybe Sarah.It still feels forced to me. Taylor may be too preoccupied with shifting to hear what Sarah was saying, but Armsmaster should have. That plus how none of the present New Wave was reacting in surprise at the accusation should have raised some warnings in his mind.
Taylor also seems to be flipping back and forth mentally between instinct and reason pretty fast.
Well I was going to point out that Armsmaster still jumped to potentially lethal force as a measure far too quickly, but:
Seems you already covered it; though you still need to update this site's version to the fixed dialog.Okay.
Before anyone makes any more comments, this is the passage in question as it stands. Read it before making any more comments.
I'm going to bed. Where I should have been two hours ago.
Taylor Triggered what, like 3 hours ago? With powers with a strong instinctual aspect (else she wouldn't be able to fly, or breathe different types of flames).Taylor also seems to be flipping back and forth mentally between instinct and reason pretty fast.
Oh, and seriously, did Taylor justI'm fairly sure he designed it to be Lung proof.blow a beam of Plasma on Halbeards halberd?
...actually, I think that was Ack commenting that Lung may not exist in this reality.
Well... that's certainly a way the chapter could have gone.
I think the current version is fine, but that's also an option. I'm not sure if Photon Mom would just keep talking like that while losing a hand and seeing a halberd get ruined.
Well she's probably running on adrenaline and subconsciously knows that she has a Pan Pan to heal her stump.