[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

[Gur40]

Biggest April Fools Idea is this
Jaune when trapped in the Ever After Charmed and Married the Blacksmith unaware she is the Goddess of the Ever After and the Brothers Mom,,, until Team RWBY and Neo arrived
how does this go?
Is the Blacksmith desperate to keep her new hubby?
is she just going to send the heroine away with OP gear to save there world to ease her Husbands worries and more importantly protect her in-laws?
The Brothers find out they finally have an actual parent?
So many ideas! Angst Drama! the feeling of betrayal from the secrets kept! and then the other version on the other thread

 

[Gyron]

So, what are April Fools Day pranks our band of characters might pull?

Click to shrink...

Jaune bakes 2 batches of cookies, one that looks like vegetables but taste like cookies, and ones that look like regular cookies but taste like vegetables. He then makes a show of eating the former with his meal (maybe getting Ren involved to sell the bit) while being super defensive about the later and says he's saving them for later.

Ruby (and Nora) are tricked, double-crossed, totally bamboozled into eating their vegetables.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The academy cafeteria was quieter than usual during the midday lull, most students still in morning lectures or out on field exercises. JNPR and RWBY had left at dawn for a multi-day training mission in the Emerald Forest, and the absence of their usual noise left a strange hush over Beacon.

Glynda Goodwitch had cleared her schedule between classes to collect Mia from the daycare. The little girl was waiting by the door, ears drooping, clutching her stuffed bunny like a lifeline.

"Miss Goodwitch!" the daycare attendant called cheerfully. "She's been asking for her papa every ten minutes."

Glynda's stern expression softened by a fraction as she knelt to Mia's level. "Come along, little one. We'll have lunch, and then you can help me sort some paperwork until your father returns."

Mia nodded silently and slipped her small hand into Glynda's. They hadn't spoken the whole trip to the cafeteria.

They claimed a quiet corner table near the windows. Glynda set Mia on the bench beside her, then thought better of it and lifted the child into her lap instead, adjusting her posture so Mia could lean comfortably against her chest. A simple lunch arrived for the child-chicken soup, soft bread, and sliced fruit-but Mia only poked at the bowl with her spoon, swirling the broth without much interest.

Glynda noticed immediately. She dipped the spoon herself, blew gently on it, and held it to Mia's lips. "One bite for your papa. Another for your aunties. They're working very hard today."

Mia opened her mouth reluctantly and took the spoonful.

"Are Papa and my aunties okay?" she asked in a small voice after swallowing.

Glynda's hand paused only a moment before scooping another bite.

"I am quite sure they are fine. Your father and his friends are capable. I trained them myself, after all. They know how to watch each other's backs."

Mia took the next bite a little more willingly, but her ears stayed flat.

"But… what if a big Grimm comes?"

Glynda helped her with another spoonful, wiping a stray drop from Mia's chin with a napkin.

"It is okay to worry, Mia. Worry shows you care. But I pushed them harder than most."

Mainly to keep them on task and from causing more trouble, but Glynda didn't say that. Instead:

"They are very capable. Now eat, or your father will scold me for letting you skip lunch."

Mia managed a few more bites, leaning heavier into Glynda's embrace. After a quiet moment she asked, "Do you worry about your mommy and daddy?"

Glynda's hand stilled. She set the spoon down and sighed, a long, weary sound that carried years behind it.

"I haven't worried for them in a very long time," she said softly. "They passed away a long time ago."

Mia blinked up at her, big blue eyes wide.

"Like my Mama?"

Glynda nodded once.

"Yes. Like your mama."

She stroked one of Mia's fluffy ears with a gentle thumb, the motion slow and soothing. Mia closed her eyes and leaned in as Glynda continued.

"I worried about them many times when I was younger. They worried about me too. But I worked very hard so they would not have to. I wanted to be strong enough to protect them."

Mia tilted her head.

"Did you protect them?"

Glynda was silent for a long moment. Her gaze drifted to the window, to the distant treeline. She saw, for just a heartbeat, the memory she tried never to visit: the empty, torn-open house on the outskirts of her parents' village just beyond Vale. The splintered door hanging from one hinge. The dark smears across the floor. The two bodies she had found when she arrived too late after the Grimm attack.

She shook her head once, sharply, banishing the image, and pulled Mia closer, wrapping both arms around the small girl in a tight hug.

"Yes," Glynda whispered against Mia's hair. "I did."

Mia hugged her back, small arms tight around Glynda's neck.

"Your father will come back," Glynda said firmly, voice steady again.

"I know!" Mia replied, muffled against her shoulder. "He promised… but I still worry!"

Glynda's lips curved in the faintest, saddest smile. She pressed a kiss to the top of Mia's head, right between her ears.

"You always do," she murmured.

 

[ThunderBasilisk]

Well that's just sad and yet wholesome

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Athena Nikos came to Beacon to visit her daughter in person. She found her on the green, relaxing with her team and RWBY. Jaune was strumming his guitar as Orleans grazed nearby.

Pyrrha: "Mother!"

Pyrrha rose. Athena frowned deeply.

Athena: "Pyrrha... That incident where you ran off with your team leader... That was very reckless! The tabloids already think you're having an affair!"

Pyrrha: "I uh... Um..."

Jaune stands up.

Jaune: "Sorry about that, ma'am. Weren't my intention. But if Pyrrha wanted to get some air, I ain't gonna impede her."

Athena: raised eyebrow "I suppose that's... Admirable. But show some decorum next time!"

Jaune: "Yes ma'am. I'll keep that in mind."

Pyrrha: smiles softly at him

Nora: "I mean, we did help save Vale so maybe we're allowed to go around Vale on a flying horse? And take photos with sloths in the zoo enclosure?"

Jaune: "A maybe on the first, Nora. No on the last one."

Nora: pouts

Athena: sighs "Well... I'm hoping we could try another recording session. You have the skills as a singer, Pyrrha!"

Pyrrha: "Well... Um... I don't know..."

Jaune: "You do have a pretty voice, Pyrrha."

Pyrrha: "I suppose I'm just not sold on pop songs. After all, I wouldn't want to step on Weiss' toes."

Weiss: scowls "Oh?"

Pyrrha: "Yes."

Athena: "Oh! What about a duet, Miss Schnee? Surely you two get along well! Just think of it-A wonderful come back with my lovely daughter!"

Weiss: "I..." At Pyrrha's quiet pleading expression, she clears her throat "I'd... Have to talk it over with my agents. But honestly, I'm trying to focus on my studies these days."

Athena: "So is Pyrrha! Come now, everyone loves a comeback!"

Nora: "OH! OH! OH! Maybe Pyrrha could sing cowboy songs like Jaune!"

Athena: "'Cowboy Songs'?"

If skepticism had a human avatar, it would be Athena Nikos. Jaune coughed.
Jaune: "Ahhh... Just... You don't always have good reception on the road so you gotta make yer own music. I like it myself."

Pyrrha: "He's quite good, actually!"

Weiss: "Yes... He has some skill."

Athena: "Very well. Sing for me, Mister Arc."

Jaune: "Er... Yes ma'am, if you insist."

Jaune strums his guitar and begins to sing.

Jaune: "The sun is sinking in the west
The cattle go down to the stream
The redwing settles in the nest
It's time for a cowboy to dream..."
Orleans begins to sway with the music... As do Pyrrha, Ren, Nora, Weiss, Ruby, Blake and Yang.

Jaune: "Purple light in the canyons
That's where I long to be
With my three good companions
Just my rifle, pony and me

Gonna hang (gonna hang) my sombrero (my sombrero)
On the limb (on the limb) of a tree (of a tree)
Comin' home (comin' home) sweetheart darlin' (sweetheart darlin')
Just my rifle, pony and me..."
Athena raises an eyebrow and looks a bit misty eyed.

Jaune: "(Whippoorwill in the willow
Sings a sweet melody
Riding to Amarillo)
Just my rifle, pony and me
No more cows (no more cows) to be ropened (to be ropened)
No more strays will I see
Round the bend (round the bend) she'll be waitin' (she'll be waitin')
For my rifle, pony and me
For my rifle, my pony and me...
Just my rifle, my pony and me..."

Jaune stops. The spell is broken. Athena blinks her eyes rapidly, and shakes her head.

Athena: "Ahem... Well... That's quite impressive, Mister Arc."

Jaune: "Shucks ma'am. Just a lot of practice."

Athena: "Hmmm... Have you considered becoming a professional? You and Pyrrha could be a perfect duet couple!"

Pyrrha: bright red, happy!

Weiss: bright red, angry!

Yang: Eyes red

Ruby: scowls

Blake: scowl

Nora: "Would it make him rich enough to build me a pancake castle?"

Athena: "... Possibly!"

Nora: "I say go for it, Jaune-Jaune!"

Jaune: "I uh-Again, ma'am, trying to focus on my studies!"

Weiss: "Yes! He is!" grabs Jaune's arm

Yang: "He's the most studious guy you'll ever find!" Hugs him from behind

Ruby: "Yeah! Also we need to work on our homework for Weapons Class!"

Jaune: "Eh? But we ain't gotta do it for another-URK!"

Ruby: "NOW!"

Ruby drags him off, as Yang and Weiss pursue. Blake, Nora and Ren follow after, looking amused or resigned. Orleans trots off after them. Pyrrha scowls a bit after them. She sees Athena staring at her, and flushes.

Pyrrha: "Ahem... Um..."

Athena: "... I see..."

Pyrrha: "N-No! No, w-we're just good friends-!"

Athena: "And is that all you want, Pyrrha?"

Pyrrha: "... No..."

Athena: "Then I suggest you get in there and take that cowboy."

Pyrrha: "B-But what about the tabloids?"

Athena: "Sometimes you must risk the tabloids for everything!"

A pause.

Athena: "Plus, if you don't go for him, I WILL."

Pyrrha: "MOTHER?!"

 

[Googlyspoof]

Athena: "Sometimes you must risk the tabloids for everything!"

A pause.

Athena: "Plus, if you don't go for him, I WILL."

Pyrrha: "MOTHER?!"

Click to shrink...

Once again jaunes milf magnet power activates

 

[ThunderBasilisk]

Seems no matter the world Jaunes a milf magnet

 

[LordofBones]

Crack idea: A partnership of human and faunus businessowners opens a successful resort on the opposite end of Menagerie, with hotels, sprawling beaches, and even a film crew to record the first vacationers (including JNPR) and interview the owners.

Shere Khan: "Ah, well, Kuo Kuana has been officially designated a heritage site. Due to a variety of reasons, guests will need certain equipment before they're allowed to go for the tour."
Reporter: "Mr. Khan, are these...fake cat ears? A fake tail?"
Wally Gator: "Kuo Kuana is very traditional. In fact, it's the most traditional pre-War faunus settlement with the, er, old cultures and traditions still alive and well..."
Will E. Coyote: *holds up signal cards* "Big cat faunus rule, other felines are second class, then other mammal faunus, and everyone else can get fucked."
Tom Cat: "Without the human slavery. I think."
Shere Khan: "We wish to preserve Kuo Kuana's traditional way of life; as such, tours to Kuo Kuana will be heavily restricted. Guests will instead have access to the Menagerie of Wonders, the very first island zoological park. With dinosaurs."

*cuts to Pyrrha in a tiger-fur bikini dozing on a docile T-Rex's head while Ren swims alongside a mosasaur and its handlers, while Jaune shows park guests how to handle raptors and Nora headbutts a pachycephalosaurus*

Blake: *foaming at the mouth*

 

[digcat]

 

[digcat]

What would rwby and jnpr think if they watched some chat music. (if you have not seen any i really recommend it)

 

[Sliverhero]

What would rwby and jnpr think if they watched some chat music. (if you have not seen any i really recommend it)

Click to shrink...

It depends on if there is any based on Rwby if not they just find it werid and not care

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The little bakery Taiyang Xiao Long had impulsively purchased sat on a quiet corner of Vale's commercial district, its fresh-painted sign reading Xiao Long Buns in cheerful yellow letters. Demand had exploded almost overnight—partly because the pastries were genuinely excellent, and partly because word had spread that the owner and his "very enthusiastic helpers" had a habit of working shirtless on hot days.

Taiyang wiped sweat from his brow behind the counter, flour dusting his bare chest. "Geez, it's so frigging hot!"

Jaune, working the register beside him in nothing but an apron and jeans, nodded vigorously. "I know, right?!" He pulled off his own shirt and tossed it aside without a second thought.

They emerged from the back carrying trays of fresh-baked goods—golden croissants, sticky cinnamon rolls, and thick meat pies still steaming. A line of customers (mostly women) had already formed outside the door.

The next day, the line stretched halfway down the block.

- - -

In Ozpin's office at Beacon, the headmaster stared at the latest expenditure report with the weary expression of a man who had seen far too much.

"…Glynda," he said slowly, "why did we spend forty-three percent of our discretionary budget on 'baked goods' this last month?"

Glynda Goodwitch, standing ramrod straight beside his desk, said nothing. Her cheeks were faintly pink.

Ozpin adjusted his glasses. "Glynda?"

She turned on her heel and marched straight out of the office without another word.

Oobleck zipped into the room at blinding speed, coffee mug in hand. "IS THAT WHERE THE COFFEE FUNDS WENT?!"

"Seems so," Ozpin sighed.

- - -

Ruby and Yang had taken over the shop for the day while Taiyang was "handling important business." Jaune, ever helpful, had volunteered to stay and assist.

Weiss walked in, took one look at the counter, and froze.

"WH-WHAT?! WHERE ARE YOUR-ARE YOU WEARING A NAKED APRON?!"

Jaune blinked, wiping his hands on his apron. "No, I just don't have a shirt. It's too hot! There's a ventilation issue."

Yang leaned over the counter in nothing but a sports bra and apron, grinning. "I have a bra on, princess! And the apron!"

Ruby popped up beside her, also apron-only over a tank top. "Me too!"

Pyrrha slammed a handful of Lien onto the counter, face burning.

Jaune smiled. "Pyrrha, you didn't say what you want-"

"You pick."

"But-!"

"You pick," Pyrrha insisted.

Blake stood a little further back, ears twitching. "Huh… I guess I'm kind of desensitized due to… some reason…"

The bell above the door jingled as Sun walked in. "Hey Jaune! Banana bread ready for me?"

"Sure is, Sun!"

"There's the reason," Weiss snarked.

"Shut up," Blake muttered, red.

CRDL and CFVY lingered near the back of the shop, looking increasingly tired of the entire situation.

Cardin muttered, "I just wanted some donuts, man…"

Velvet, along with the rest of her team and CRDL, echoed in tired unison: "Ditto…"

Jaune brought out a tray of fresh donuts. One of them burst, squirting cream filling straight across his chest.

"GAH! RUBY! YOU PUT TOO MUCH IN!"

Ruby beamed. "No such thing!"

Jaune sighed and pulled off the apron to wipe himself down, revealing his sweaty, flour-dusted upper body.

Velvet's ears perked straight up. She drooled a little.

Coco lowered her shades. "……Nice."

Cardin threw his hands in the air. "DAMNIT JAUNE, COVER UP!"

Jaune blinked. "What? What?!"

"COVER UP, YOU-YOU WEIRDO! IT'S A SAFETY OSHA VIOLATION OR-OR SOMETHING!"

Weiss was openly drooling, as was Pyrrha.

Yang looked smug as hell (and bright red).

Ren turned to Yang with a deadpan expression. "So… where is your dad anyways?"

Yang opened her mouth-then paused.

Nora popped up from behind the counter. "Probably off putting a bun in the oven."

Ruby tilted her head. "What? He's not here though."

Yang shrugged. "Yeah, he said he wanted to meet with Goodwitch about some kind of partnership with Beacon Academy for Vy-"

She froze. Her brain put together a lot of terrible implications.

Jaune yelped as Nora suddenly sprayed him with a bottle of olive oil. "ACK! NORA! WHY'D YOU SPRAY ME WITH OLIVE OIL?!"

Nora grinned maniacally. "THE ECONOMY!"

Jaune stared at her. "The hell are you talking about-?!"

"RAISE THE GDP, JAUNE!"

Jaune threw his hands up. "THAT'S NOT WHAT THAT MEANS! ACK! STOP!"

Yang, momentarily distracted by the glistening, shirtless Jaune, blinked. "…Wha… What were we talking about?"

Weiss, still staring, muttered, "Could you… theoretically… get him to wear chocolate sauce? N-Not that I'm interested in him but it might… be… y-you know… Oh my…"

Pyrrha slammed more money onto the counter.

Ruby grinned. "Oh, we'll find a way~!"

 

[John Jackson]

Is it telling that I mostly identify with Oz about the lack of coffee?

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

Is it telling that I mostly identify with Oz about the lack of coffee?

Click to shrink...

I'll never understand why people spend so much effort to cultivate, harvest, roast, and grind plant seeds only to ruin perfectly good water with them.....

Thanks for the short!

 

[John Jackson]

I'll never understand why people spend so much effort to cultivate, harvest, roast, and grind plant seeds only to ruin perfectly good water with them.....

Thanks for the short!

Click to shrink...

Found the heretic and I can't imagine fighting an unending war against the forces of evil and destruction without coffee

 

[LordofBones]

The little bakery Taiyang Xiao Long had impulsively purchased sat on a quiet corner of Vale's commercial district, its fresh-painted sign reading Xiao Long Buns in cheerful yellow letters. Demand had exploded almost overnight—partly because the pastries were genuinely excellent, and partly because word had spread that the owner and his "very enthusiastic helpers" had a habit of working shirtless on hot days.

Taiyang wiped sweat from his brow behind the counter, flour dusting his bare chest. "Geez, it's so frigging hot!"

Jaune, working the register beside him in nothing but an apron and jeans, nodded vigorously. "I know, right?!" He pulled off his own shirt and tossed it aside without a second thought.

Click to shrink...

New idea: Team JNPR always skips lunch because Jaune takes up the all-important leader task of making sure his teammates are fed properly and because food fights aren't conducive for his team's nutritional needs.

Ruby: "I - where'd you get that cake?"
Nora: "Jaune-jaune."
Ruby: "He bought it?"
Nora: "Nah, made it. I smashed fifty Grimm and got dessert privileges last night."

Ren: *stabs down between a shadow clone's fingers without looking* "Feline, if you do so much as breathe on my steamed fish I will burn your books. Jaune learned my father's recipe just to make me this."

Pyrrha: *tearing up at the Hellenic roast lamb* "Oh, Jaune, you shouldn't have - maybe just a little bit..."
Yang: *enviously watched Pyrrha tear through a full leg with hands and teeth without a care in the world through the window*

 

[ExFelineServer3]

Jaune cares period.

 

[Unknown_One]

Bakery 2- Mixing Boogaloo:

It was a slightly cooler day but not cool enough for Jaune. The large mixer was busy kneading a fresh batch of brioche, but there still needed other pastries to be made. So, he began mixing dough on the bench near the display. His bared chest and arms flexing as he kneaded the dough for cinnamon rolls.

Of course, the fact the line went from halfway around the block to the sales front being overcrowded was not unnoticed.

Ren looked around at the gathered group, 90% of them were women, 10% men. The women were openly gawking at the showcase of his baking prowess.

"What'll it be?" Taiyang said, as he wiped off his hands and approached the counter.

"May I get 2 eclairs, please?" A taller woman requested. Her white hair put up and her uniform in pristine condition as always,

"Absolutely. 2 Eclairs, coming up!" Taiyang replied. Yang then walked behind Jaune to gather the requested treats as Tai took another order.

Jaune took a second from his kneading to look at the woman who made the request. His brow furled in thought. "Sorry for asking, but are you related to Weiss?"

The taller woman raised her right eyebrow. "Indeed, I am her sister. And who might you be?"

Yang slid alongside, a grin on her face. "He's Jaune. Used to be sweet on Weisscream." Then she pointed her right thumb at herself. "I'm Yang, her teammate. And here are your eclairs."

Jaune slunk back for a brief second. "Y-yeah, but I finally understood she didn't like me. But we're at least friendly. So, what's your name?"

Winter nodded as she took the bag of treats. "I am Winter. It's nice to meet you both."

Jaune tilted his head in her direction. "Nice to meet you, Winter."

The specialist was about to make a teasing observation when Coco shouted. "Move, Lady! You can ask for cream pies later!"

The fact the entire bakery and patrons' faces went bright crimson was not unnoticed.

 

[zMADLAXz]

The specialist was about to make a teasing observation when Coco shouted. "Move, Lady! You can ask for cream pies later!"

The fact the entire bakery and patrons' faces went bright crimson was not unnoticed.

Click to shrink...

Bunch of Horny idiots.

I could absolutely go for a creampie right now. Or maybe a Key lime pie? A Cheescake?

Damn now I am hungry.

 

[ThunderBasilisk]

Damn now I am hungry.

Click to shrink...

Dirt Cake with Extra Oreos