[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

[AndrewJTalon]

Pyrrha stepped off the airship ramp with a weary sigh, the weight of the day's commercial shoot clinging to her like Mistral's humid air. The director had been relentless—endless takes of her "invincible" smile for some energy drink ad, all while she balanced on a wire rig pretending to battle holographic Grimm. Her muscles ached, her ponytail was slightly askew, and the faint glitter of stage makeup still dusted her cheeks. But Beacon's spires rose welcoming against the late afternoon sky, and that alone eased the knot in her chest.

She checked her scroll: early enough to swing by the academy's daycare before the others got back. A small smile tugged at her lips. Mia time. That always made everything better.

The daycare was a bright, chaotic haven tucked into Beacon's lower levels—walls painted with murals of heroic Huntsmen, toys scattered like battlefield debris. Mia spotted her instantly, ears perking straight up from behind a fort of foam blocks.

"Big Sister Pyrrha!" The little girl bolted across the room, leaping into Pyrrha's open arms with the unbridled enthusiasm only a four-year-old could muster.

Pyrrha caught her easily, exhaustion melting away as she hugged Mia close. "Hello, little one. Ready for a snack? I hear the cafeteria has fresh apple slices today."

Mia's blue eyes lit up. "With peanut butter? And no carrots?"

Pyrrha chuckled, setting her down and taking her tiny hand. "No carrots. I promise."

They wandered to the cafeteria, the halls quiet with most students still in classes or training. Pyrrha grabbed a tray—apple slices (with peanut butter), a yogurt for Mia, and a simple protein shake for herself. They claimed a corner table by the windows, overlooking the training fields where distant figures sparred under the fading sun.

Mia dipped an apple slice with gusto, chattering about her day—something involving a finger-painting Grimm that looked suspiciously like a Beowolf with cat ears. Pyrrha listened with half her attention, the other half drifting to the warmth of the moment. These quiet times with Mia felt like a glimpse into something deeper, something she wasn't sure she deserved.

Then Mia paused mid-bite, tilting her head curiously. "Big Sister Pyrrha… can you give me a sibling?"

Pyrrha nearly choked on her shake. She set the cup down carefully, cheeks warming. "A… sibling? Mia, that's not exactly how it works."

Mia's ears drooped slightly, but her eyes were earnest. "But you like Papa, right? And Papa likes you. Auntie Yang said that's how you get siblings—when grown-ups like each other a lot."

Pyrrha's flush deepened. She glanced around the empty cafeteria, ensuring no eavesdroppers. "I… care very much for your papa, Mia. He's kind and strong and… wonderful. But it's complicated. I'm… nervous about things like that."

Mia frowned, dipping another apple but not eating it. "Why nervous? Is it like when I have to fight the dark in my closet?"

Pyrrha smiled softly, touched by the innocence. "A little. When I was a girl, not much older than you, I visited an oracle in Typhon—a city near Argus, in the Hellenic League. She told me I'd do something great one day… but that I'd suffer great sorrow, and I'd face it alone."

Mia's nose wrinkled. "That's dumb. How could she know the future?"

Pyrrha's voice gentled. "The gods give her visions, or so they say. Prophecies from the old ways."

Mia shook her head firmly, ears twitching. "Papa told me there's only one God, and He doesn't want people to be unhappy. He loves them. So why
would He make you sad alone?"

Pyrrha's breath caught. Out of the mouths of babes. She stared at the little girl, heart twisting. "I… don't want to believe the prophecy, Mia. But I'm afraid. Afraid of getting close to your papa, of subjecting him to the loss I might bring. What if the sorrow comes, and it hurts him too?"

Mia reached across the table, patting Pyrrha's hand with sticky peanut-butter fingers. "That's super dumb. Papa would love you anyway. Like he loves me, even when I'm bad."

Pyrrha laughed—a soft, watery sound—blinking back unexpected tears. "You're wiser than you know, little one."

Mia wasn't done. "Is there more dumb stuff?"

Pyrrha hesitated, then sighed. "My mother… she's very controlling. She has plans for me—tournaments, endorsements, a life mapped out. I'm afraid of going against her. Of choosing my own happiness."

Mia's face scrunched up in pure four-year-old outrage. "That's really dumb! Why would your mom want you to not be happy?"

Pyrrha leaned back, staring out the window. "It's… grown-up stuff, Mia. Complicated."

"Grown-up stuff is dumb," Mia declared solemnly.

Pyrrha met her eyes, a real smile breaking through. "Yes. Yes, it is."

The cafeteria door swung open then, and Jaune strode in—hair damp from a post-workout shower, hoodie slung over his shoulder, looking every bit the exhausted but content dad. His eyes lit up when he spotted them.

"Mia! Pyr!"
"Papa!" Mia slid off her chair and barreled into him. He scooped her up effortlessly, hugging her tight and nuzzling his nose against hers in their ritual Eskimo kiss. She giggled, nuzzling back with enthusiasm.

Pyrrha stood, brushing crumbs from her lap, her earlier nervousness fading under the warmth of the scene. "Jaune. I'm glad to see you."

He set Mia down, ruffling her hair before turning to Pyrrha with a soft smile. "You too. Beat me to pickup duty, huh?"

She nodded. "Early flight back. How was training?"

"Brutal, but good." He glanced at the half-eaten snacks. "You two look cozy. Up for dinner? I was thinking that noodle place in Vale."

Pyrrha's heart skipped. "I'd like that. Very much."

Mia grinned mischievously, grabbing one of Jaune's hands and one of Pyrrha's. "Let's go now!"

They started toward the door, Mia swinging between them like a happy pendulum. Then, with a sly look, she yanked her hands free—pushing theirs together instead—and darted ahead, giggling wildly as she skipped down the hall.

Jaune sighed, shaking his head fondly. He made to pull away, but Pyrrha's fingers laced tentatively with his, warm and callused from training. He looked at her in surprise.

Pyrrha's breath caught, but she squeezed back, her smile shy and bright.

"I… don't mind."

"Me neither," he murmured.

They walked like that, hands entwined, Mia's laughter echoing ahead like a promise of simpler, less dumb grown-up stuff.

For now, at least.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Weiss adjusted her posture on the low bench in Beacon's Star Maiden Garden, the afternoon sun filtering through the tree leaves like scattered diamonds. Mia sat cross-legged beside her, meticulously arranging a collection of wildflowers they'd picked—daisies for "happy thoughts," buttercups for "sunshine giggles," as Mia had declared with solemn authority. The little girl's ears twitched every time a bee buzzed by, but she was focused, tongue poking out in concentration.

Weiss had volunteered for pickup duty today, her schedule clear after a morning seminar on Dust applications. It was a small thing, but these moments with Mia felt like stolen breaths of fresh air. A from lectures, away from the weight of the Schnee name that still clung to her like frost on glass.

Mia held up a lopsided crown of woven stems. "Auntie Weiss! This is for you. It's a princess crown 'cause you're a princess!"

Weiss's lips curved in a genuine smile, accepting the gift and placing it carefully atop her white hair. "Thank you, Mia. It's perfect. Shall I make one for you?"

Mia nodded enthusiastically. Weiss pulled her into her lap, and began to weave her down flower crown. The four year old then tilted her head, ears twitching slightly.

"Auntie Weiss… why don't you talk about your mama and papa like Papa talks about Granny and Papa?"

Weiss paused mid-weave, fingers stilling on the stems. Mia's innocent curiosity had a way of cutting straight to the heart, but there was no malice in it, just a child's endless wonder.

Weiss set the half-finished crown aside and turned to face her fully, keeping her voice light and gentle, like telling a bedtime story.

"Well, little one, my family is… a bit like a big, fancy castle made of ice. It looks beautiful from far away, all shiny and tall, but inside, it's very cold and sometimes lonely."

Mia's eyes widened, ears perking. "Cold like winter? But you like snow!"

Weiss chuckled softly. "I do like snow—when it's soft and fun to play in. But my castle… my papa was like a king who cared more about gold and rules than hugs. He made everyone follow his orders, even when it made them sad. My mama… she tried to be warm, but the cold made her tired, so she hid away with her special drinks that grown-ups use when they're unhappy."

Mia's nose wrinkled. "That's not nice. Papas should give hugs and make pancakes. Why was he mean?"

Weiss reached over, tucking a stray curl behind Mia's ear. "Sometimes grown-ups forget how to be kind because they're scared or hurt from their own castles. My big sister Winter—she's like a brave knight—ran away to join the army so she could protect people and be free. My little brother Whitley… he's still in the castle, learning the rules, but I think he wants to be warm too someday."

Mia thought about this, her tail swishing slowly. "Did you run away like Auntie Winter?"

Weiss nodded, her expression softening with pride. "I did. I came to Beacon to learn how to be a Huntress, to fight the real monsters and make my own path. Away from the cold rules. Now I have a new family—your papa, you, the teams. It's warmer here. Full of hugs and adventures."

Mia's face brightened, and she threw her arms around Weiss's waist in a fierce hug. "You're my Auntie Weiss! No more cold castle. We have pancake castle now!"

Weiss hugged her back, a quiet laugh escaping as she blinked away the unexpected prick of tears. "Pancake castle sounds perfect, Mia. Absolutely perfect."

Mia pulled back, still beaming, then tilted her head again with that boundless curiosity.

"Auntie Weiss… could you give me a sibling with Papa?"

Weiss's cheeks flushed a delicate pink, her composure cracking just a fraction. She smoothed her skirt unnecessarily, buying a moment. "A sibling? Mia, that's… quite the request."

Mia nodded earnestly, ears perking. "Papa would be super warm! He'd never be mean, and he loves to play in the snow! Like snowball fights and building forts!"

Weiss's flush deepened, but a small, wistful smile tugged at her lips. "It… would be nice, wouldn't it? But my father… he'd make things difficult. He's still very much like that cold king in the castle."

Mia pouted, crossing her arms. "Why? That's not fair!"

Weiss sighed softly, weaving the last stems into Mia's crown and placing it on her head. "He wants me to marry a prince—someone with a fancy title and lots of gold. To keep the castle strong."

Mia's pout turned into a fierce scowl. "But Papa's a great knight! Knights are supposed to save princesses and marry them and live happily ever after!"

Weiss giggled then-a light, genuine sound that surprised even her-after adjusting her own flower crown.

"You're right, Mia. Knights do save princesses. And happily ever after sounds… wonderful."

The garden path crunched under footsteps just then, and Jaune appeared around the bend, hair tousled from the wind, a sheepish grin on his face.

"Hey, you two. Sorry I'm late. I got held up in Oobleck's lecture. Thanks so much for looking after her, Weiss."

Weiss stood gracefully, brushing a leaf from her skirt. "I'm glad to. She's wonderful company."

Mia bounced up, grabbing Jaune's hand. "Papa! Dinner now?"

Jaune chuckled, ruffling her hair. "What do you say, Weiss? Care to join us? My treat."

Weiss's eyes sparkled faintly. "I'd like that. Take us to dinner, then?"

Mia clapped. "Pancakes!"

Weiss snorted, a hand over her mouth to stifle a laugh. "We could just stay home for that, Mia."

The little girl thought for a second, then declared, "Beef spaghetti!"

Weiss nodded approvingly. "Beef spaghetti it is."

Jaune grinned. "Sounds good to me."

As they started walking, Mia darted between them, grabbing their free hands and tugging. Then, with a mischievous glint, she pushed Jaune's hand toward Weiss's arm. "Papa! Take Auntie Weiss's arm! You're a knight, and she's a princess—that's what knights do!"

Jaune's cheeks went pink, his step faltering. Weiss blushed too, but after a heartbeat, she held out her arm gracefully, meeting his eyes with a teasing smile.

"I agree."

Jaune cleared his throat, but his grin was warm as he took her arm, escorting her properly toward the bullhead docks.

"I would never argue with a princess."

Weiss arched an eyebrow, her voice light. "You'd better not."

Behind them, Mia skipped ahead, giggling triumphantly, the flower crowns bobbing like promises in the fading light.

- - -

PHEW! Managed these three today... Now I'm taking a break. Hope you liked it.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The Mistralian street festival sprawled across Vale's old harbor district like a living tapestry—red lanterns swaying overhead, the air thick with the sizzle of street vendors frying dumplings and skewering glazed pork, and the rhythmic thump of drums guiding dragon dancers through the crowd. Paper lions snapped their jaws at children, firecrackers popped in cheerful bursts, and every stall overflowed with silk scarves, jade trinkets, and sugar-dusted pastries shaped like carp and phoenixes.

Jaune had to go to a meeting of team leaders, Pyrrha had another commercial shoot, and RWBY were off on their own adventures. So Jaune had happily agreed to let Nora and Ren take Mia to the festival.

Nora carried Mia on her shoulders like a conquering general, the little girl's fluffy ears bouncing with every excited bounce. Ren walked beside them, hands in his pockets, a small, quiet smile on his face as he watched the two of the most important people in his world soak in the chaos.

"Look! Nora! Fire chicken!" Mia squealed, pointing at a vendor twirling a flaming wok of sizzling noodles.

"That's called 'stir-fried dragon whiskers,'" Nora declared, already digging in her pocket for lien. "Three bowls, extra spicy for me, mild for the tiny terror, and whatever Ren wants."

Ren raised an eyebrow. "I'll take the mild too. Someone has to keep their taste buds intact."

Mia giggled and leaned forward, hugging Nora's head. "You're the best big auntie ever!"

They ate standing up, sauce dripping down chins, Mia's cheeks puffed like a chipmunk as she tried to fit an entire pork bun in her mouth at once. Nora cheered her on like it was an Olympic event. Ren wiped Mia's face with a napkin, gentle and unhurried.

Next came the hammer game.

The stall owner—a burly Mistrali man with a braided beard—grinned when Nora stepped up, Magnhild slung casually over her shoulder like it weighed nothing.

"Think you can ring the bell, little lady?"

Nora cracked her knuckles. "Watch this."

She swung the mallet once—WHAM—the puck shot up the tower, the bell clanged so hard the whole stall rattled, and the owner's jaw dropped.

"Uh… that's… a new record," he managed, handing her the top prize: an enormous plush panda almost as big as Nora herself.

Mia clapped wildly. "Nora's the strongest!"

Ren accepted the panda with a small bow to the stunned vendor. "Thank you. She gets… enthusiastic."

They wandered on, Nora now carrying both Mia and the panda (somehow), until they reached the petting zoo corral at the festival's edge. Geese, goats, fluffy sheep, and a very dignified-looking peacock milled about in a pen of straw and low fences.

Nora set Mia down. "Go on, kitten! Say hi to the fluffy army. We'll be right here."

Mia bolted inside, immediately chasing a honking goose with delighted squeals. The goose, clearly offended, flapped away in a cloud of feathers. Mia pursued, laughing so hard she nearly tripped over her own feet.

Nora leaned on the fence beside Ren, watching with soft, unguarded fondness. The festival noise faded to a pleasant hum around them.

"I want one," Nora said suddenly, voice quieter than usual.

Ren glanced at her. "We can't steal a baby, Nora."

She elbowed him gently. "That's not what I mean, you dork."

He smiled, small and knowing. "I know what you mean."

Nora turned to face him fully, arms crossed, the panda squished between them like a fluffy chaperone. "Then why not? We're good with Mia. We're good together. We could… you know. Have our own tiny chaos gremlin."

Ren's gaze drifted back to Mia, who had finally cornered the goose and was now trying to pet it while it hissed indignantly. His expression softened, but there was a shadow there too.

"I'm not sure how to answer that yet," he admitted. "Not because I don't want it. Because… everything we do affects more than just us. And I want to be sure we're ready. Really ready."

Nora scowled, but it was the soft kind of scowl she saved only for him—the one that said she was frustrated but still loved him. "You know how I feel. I've never hidden it. Why can't you just… tell me the same?"

Ren reached over, brushing a strand of orange hair from her face. His touch lingered. "I do feel the same. I've felt it for a long time. I just… want to give any child we have the kind of certainty I never had growing up. No running. No hiding. Just… home."

Nora's scowl melted. She leaned her forehead against his. "You big sap."

Before he could reply, a triumphant shout rang out.

"Ren! Nora! Look!"

Mia came racing back, both hands cupped carefully around something. She opened them to reveal a perfect, pale goose egg, slightly warm from the sun-warmed straw.

"I found a treasure!" she crowed.

Ren crouched to her level, smiling gently. "That's very nice, Mia. But we should put it back so the mama goose doesn't get worried."

Mia pouted for half a second, then nodded. "Okay. Sorry, goose mama."

She toddled back to the pen and set the egg carefully in the straw, patting it goodbye like it was a sleeping baby. The goose honked once—almost approvingly—then waddled off.

Nora watched the whole exchange with shining eyes, then slung an arm around Ren's shoulders, pulling him close.

"See?" she whispered. "We'd be great at this."

Ren's arm came around her waist. "Yeah," he murmured. "We would."

 

[John Jackson]

As promised, I dipped my toe into the Space Opera AU
Space Opera AU





Beacon Orbital Elevator

Vale System

Vale Federation



The VNN feed was blaring in the arrival lounge and the face of Counciler Winchester yelling at Lisa Lavander greeted team RWBY and JNRP as they entered the lounge.

"…It's a national disgrace that on the eve of the Vital festival the capital world of the Vale Federation has to rely on foreign fleets and mercenary companies to guard the capital! It's been over a decade since the Mount Gleen colony massacre and home fleets still a shadow of what it was."

"But the Infinity was just commissioned and she's the most advanced warship outside the Atlis fleet."

"And we should have 100 more like her but because my opponents on the council efforts she is currently the only one of her class. That is why I'm introducing the Vale Military restoration act tomorrow of the floor of the Council…"


Jaune Arc toned out the Political talk show and turned to the smart screen as the international fleet escorting the Vital station entered into orbit around the moon of Beacon. It was an impressive collection of ships. From Gen. Ironwoods personal Super Star Destroyer and the Valcuo high liner carriers, from the Ministerial Battle Barges. In front was the delegation from the host star nation for this decade's festival, the blocky solid forms of the Vale fleet and its member nations.

Ruby of course was rattling off specifications like she had an inside source at the fleet design bureau, or a War Thunder account one of the other.

"…She's has a super MAC gun built right into her superstructure that can fire in 3 round bursts. She has more firepower than an Altis Super Star Destroyer…"

"I highly doubt that Ruby" Wises didn't keep her natural haughtiness out of her tone as she adjusted the smart wall to focus on the Atlas portion of the fleet squadrons of their triangle shaped ships in neat formation. She pointed to one of the smaller capital ships.

"Look it's the Victory my sister Winters ship, she's a huntress captain Oh it will be so good to see her again."

"I wouldn't be proud of ships constructed by extracting resources from the downtrodden!"

"Isn't that a squadron Menagerie ships on the other side of the fleet Kitty Cat?"

"That's different Yang, we bought those ships ethically from the Val navy and upgraded them for our own defense"

"Well, that explains why there all a century old Nova Class ships but where did the money to buy and upgrade those ships come from humm?'

"That's different Wises , though I do wonder why my father sent them with the international fleet. They usually don't leave Menagerie space?"

"Maybe they needed the good PR with the White Fang making so much trouble? I know that my parents ae coming, well at least that's their excuse there using to visit me all the way out here. Hey guys."

That had come from behind them as May Zedong had joined them without anyone noticing causing Jaune the jump slightly. Of Course, Nora had a different reaction.

"Yea all 3 of Beacon's space Princess's are here! Oh, I know we can have royal rumble to see who gets Jaune as a Consort."

This caused all 3 to blush and Blake to try to explain again how neither she nor Wises counted as royalty.

At an unheard command the wall once again changed its focus to the sweeping fish like Pandu flagship. That caused a slight frown to form on Jaune's face. Something that May noticed.

"What's wrong Jaune you know my parents, better than I do in a lot of ways. Why are you worrying about them coming to visit? They're your Godparents after all?"

"No, it's not that May your parents are great and I'm looking forward to seeing them it's who caught a ride with them that I'm worried about."

"O come on Vomit boy your parents will be happy to see you after all not many people have a son qualify for the Vital Tournament"

"Oh I'm sure my parents are proud even if I did go behind there backs and kind of steal the family weapon and power armor, but my mom can be a bit much and well mom and dad decided to take the opportunity of having both me and Tangy in the same star system to have a big family reunion."

This caught the Schnee heiress attention as a look of dawning horror appeared on her face.

"Arc when you say Family reunion?"

"The whole family, all my sisters, there spouses, Uncles, Aunts, really the whole family except Nana and Papa, they couldn't really leave Albion right now what with the upswing in Grim scouting fleets in the cluster."

As Wises tried to reconcile herself to that amount of Arc family related chaos Nora switched the view to a battered looking ship blocky with twin flight hangers on either side of the blocky superstructure.

"What's that one It looks badass though a little scruffy?"

Instead of the expected Ruby info dump it was Pyrrha that answered.

"That the Battle Star Galactica, she's the last of the Jupiter class Battlestar's in service of the Hellenic Luegues fleet."

"Didn't know you were a ship nerd Cereal Girl?"

"Not particularly but I know that one, It was the flagship for the fleet that supported my teacher Tel'ac when he slew the grim dark god Aries in the ruins of the Olympus colony."

"False god Girl, Dead false god."

A deep rumbling voice came from directly behind the teams of huntsman in training, Causing Jaune to jump (was everyone trying to give him a heart attack today) and he turned around to see a large man, larger even than his dad in simple robes. His skin was ashen white, an enduring symbol of the Grim worshiping cult that he had been born into. But the symbol of the Dark Mistress's servant branded on to his forehead had been disfigured and replaced with the symbol of the Table breaker. In his hand he carried a staff, on his hip road an ax that glowed with a pale blue light and on his bearded face he wore a slight smile.

He embraced the Amazon of team JNPR in a bone chorusing hug.

" Master it's so good to see you it's been too long, Oh I'm sorry I forgot my manners everyone this is my combat teacher from home Master Tel'ac, Master this is Team JNRP and RWBY and May new crown princess of Pandu."

This must be Tel'ac the redeemed, once known as Kratos the scourge of the Hellenic League, who had turned upon the grim worshipers that had enslaved him and his people and cast down the servants of the Dark Queen (may her name be forever forgotten)

Well, if he had the entire Arc clan descending on him at least he wasn't alone in having visitors. Maybee if there were enough other visitors, he could distract his mother from continuing her campaign for grandchildren maybe. At least that was the top of his worriers because its not like a gathering of hundreds of famous hunters and entire fleet from across civilized space was going to be attacked right…

Tbc

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The frontier village of Albus Ridge clung to the mountainside like a stubborn weed—stone walls, slate roofs, and a single dirt road that wound up from the valley below. RWBY and JNPR had been sent to reinforce the local militia after reports of a mad Scorpion Faunus and a small Grimm pack harassing lurking about.

They'd expected a quick fight.

They got Tyrian Callows.

Tyrian descended from the ridge in a crouch, scorpion tail arched, eyes wide and manic. The teams fanned out—Ruby's scythe already spinning, Yang's gauntlets cocked, Weiss summoning glyphs, Blake vanishing into shadow clones, Pyrrha's spear leveled, Nora grinning behind her hammer, Ren calm as ever, Jaune shield up.

Tyrian spread his arms wide. "I am the bringer of death! Servant of the true Divine of Remnant!"

Jaune stepped forward before anyone could charge. "What true Divine?"

Tyrian giggled. "Names are fleeting. Power is eternal. The strong devour the weak. That is the only truth."

Jaune's shield didn't waver. "That's just nihilism with extra steps."

Tyrian tilted his head, amused. "Oh? And what does the farm boy believe?"

"That death was conquered," Jaune said simply. "Aslan's sacrifice broke its power. More men fear to live than die."

Tyrian's laughter echoed off the rocks. "Pretty words! But everything dies, boy. Flowers. Stars. Civilizations. You. Me. Your little friends. Despair is the only honest response."

Jaune shook his head. "Nihilism is the basest philosophy. It falls apart the moment someone asks if you'd die for it."

Tyrian's grin sharpened. "I would die for my Dark Queen."

Jaune smiled—small, sad. "Then you have meaning. You're not purely nihilistic. You're just… Hobbesian. Or maybe Nietzschean with worse hair."

Tyrian froze. "What are those?"

Blake stepped forward beside Jaune, voice steady. "Philosophies. Human attempts to make sense of existence. Hobbes thought life without authority was 'nasty, brutish, and short.' Nietzsche believed in creating meaning in a meaningless world—becoming the Übermensch."

Tyrian's tail twitched. "Humans… wrote books about this?"

Jaune nodded. "Thousands of years' worth."

Tyrian stared at them—really stared—for the first time not as prey, but as something curious.

Then he lowered his blades.

"Show me these… books."

The village library was small, but surprisingly well stocked. Tyrian sat cross-legged on the floor like a child, flipping through volumes with manic glee. Hobbes. Nietzsche. Kierkegaard. Sartre. Aquinas. Lewis.

He read in silence for nearly an hour.

Finally he looked up, eyes bright.

"Humans wrote this much about thinking about things?" He laughed, delighted. "My violence will have new meaning!"

Ruby threw her hands up. "How is this a win?! I wanted to win through fighting and cool explosions!"

Jaune shrugged. "We had those too."

Yang snorted. "And we were losing."

Ruby pouted. "Gimme those books! I gotta study! I want to be the hopeful counter to some dark rival! Honestly Jaune, let me have a rival!"

Jaune turned to Tyrian. "Hey. Will you become Ruby's rival? Philosophical antithesis? You're both new at this."

Tyrian considered, then grinned. "Hmmm… Nah. If I had a female counter, I'd prefer a mature woman. Not a brat."

Ruby puffed her cheeks. "I'M DRINKING MY MILK, DAMNIT!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The Hunter's Rest was a small, dimly lit bar tucked into a side street near Vale's old commercial district. It catered to Huntsmen and Huntresses who wanted a quiet drink without the flash of downtown clubs or the rowdy energy of student hangouts. The walls were lined with faded mission photos, broken weapons mounted like trophies, and a jukebox that only played songs older than most of the clientele.

Taiyang Xiao Long pushed through the door a little after ten, shaking rain from his coat. He scanned the room out of habit—old instincts—and froze when he spotted the woman at the corner booth.

Glynda Goodwitch looked up from her glass of red wine, glasses catching the low light. For a second, neither moved.

Then Taiyang grinned—slow, surprised, genuine.

"Glynda?"

She blinked once. Then a small, reluctant smile curved her lips.

"Taiyang."

He crossed the room in long strides and slid into the booth opposite her without asking. "I didn't recognize you at first. The hair's shorter. And the glare's sharper."

Glynda arched an eyebrow. "And you've grown a beard. It suits you. Makes you look less like the boy who once tried to convince Qrow that wearing a dress for a week was 'character building.'"

Taiyang barked a laugh. "He lasted three days. Cried on day four when he had to wear heels to the mess hall."

Glynda's shoulders shook with silent laughter. "And Isabel throwing you out the window when you walked in on her showering. I've never heard a man scream that high."

Taiyang winced, rubbing his back like the memory still ached. "She said I was 'lucky it was only the second floor.' Then Summer tried to give her makeup tips the next day—like that was going to fix anything."

Glynda snorted. "Summer's makeup was always more war paint than cosmetics. She once tried to contour me with gunpowder. Said it was 'edgy.'"

They both dissolved into helpless, nostalgic laughter—the kind that only comes from shared history and too many close calls.

Taiyang sobered first, leaning forward. "So… what brings you here tonight? You don't strike me as the 'drown your sorrows in cheap wine' type."

Glynda sighed, swirling her glass. "Just… the students. They're exhausting. Brilliant, reckless, and utterly convinced they're invincible. I spend half my time trying to keep them alive long enough to graduate."

Taiyang chuckled. "Sounds familiar. Yang and Ruby's little vigilante excursions. I swear those two are trying to give me gray hair early."

Glynda's smile turned fond. "They're good kids. Both of them. But time… time moves too fast."

Taiyang nodded slowly. "Yeah. I still remember when you used to blush every time I walked into the room."

Glynda's cheeks pinked instantly. "I did not."

"You did. And I was too busy being stupid to notice you were blushing because you liked me."

Glynda looked away, but the corner of her mouth lifted. "No, you were too busy chasing Raven to notice that Summer and I were trying to get your attention."

Taiyang laughed—soft, rueful. "We were all idiots."

"We were young," Glynda corrected.

"Heh. Same thing."

They sat in comfortable silence for a while, the bar's low hum filling the space between them.

Taiyang leaned forward. "We should do this more often. Catch up. Properly. Coffee. Or drinks. Or both."

Glynda met his eyes—steady, warm. "I'd like that."

Taiyang grinned—bright, boyish, the same grin that had once convinced half of Beacon to sneak into the Emerald Forest on a dare. "It's a date, then. Not a date-date. Unless—nah, I'll let you decide."

He winked.

Glynda rolled her eyes, but the blush stayed.

"I... It might be the wine, but... I would like that."

"Well then," Taiyang said, "I should have some too. So we're square."

"Square."

What was the harm in indulging with an old friend?

- - -

The next morning, Combat Class began as usual—students filing in, yawning, stretching, complaining about early starts.

Then Glynda walked in.

She looked… different. Hair slightly mussed in a way that suggested someone had mussed it before class. Uniform impeccable, as always. But there, just above the collar of her blouse, was a very distinct hickey.

The class noticed instantly.

Murmurs spread like wildfire.

"Did you see—?"

"Professor Goodwitch has a hickey?!"

"Who do you think—?"

Glynda cleared her throat—sharp, authoritative. "Settle down. We have work to do."

The whispers quieted, but didn't stop.

Then the door opened again.

Taiyang Xiao Long strolled in, casual as ever—sleeves rolled up, blond hair still a little messy (though that was nothing new). He carried a small black purse in one hand.

"Dad!" Yang and Ruby cried.

"Morning girls! Morning Professor Goodwitch," he said cheerfully. "Sorry to drop in on your class. You forgot your purse at the bar last night and since I was here visiting, I thought I would drop it off."

Glynda's cheeks went pink—barely noticeable, but there. She took the purse with a nod. "Thank you, Mister Xiao Long."

They stared at each other for a heartbeat too long.

Nora's voice shattered the silence.

"…THEY FUCKED!"

Yang's head whipped around. "NO THEY—!"

Glynda and Taiyang both blushed—simultaneously, identically.

Yang's jaw dropped, the reality hitting her like a Goliath fired out of a cannon.

"No… nonononononoooo…!"

Ruby—wide-eyed, horrified—jammed her fingers in her ears and started belting out the only song she could think of at maximum volume:

"I'm Popeye the Sailor Man! I'm Popeye the Sailor Man! I fight to the finish cause I eats me Spinach—!"

The rest of the class erupted into pandemonium—whispers turning to shouts, laughter, someone wolf-whistling, Nora chanting "TEACHER AND DAD! TEACHER AND DAD!" while Ren tried (and failed) to calm her.

Glynda pinched the bridge of her nose.

Taiyang rubbed the back of his neck, grinning sheepishly.

"Uh… I'll just… see myself out."

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The common room was absolute chaos.

Jaune paced like a caged Beowolf, scroll clutched in one white-knuckled hand, voice cracking on every call. "She's not at the playground. Not at the library. Not answering her scroll—wait, she doesn't have a scroll, she's four!"

Ruby was halfway out the window, Crescent Rose half-unfolded. "I'll check the cliffs! She loves the view!"

Weiss had already pulled up the academy's security feeds on her scroll, muttering, "If that child has been kidnapped-!"

Blake's ears were flat under her bow, shadows flickering at her feet. "I knew I should've put a tracker on her shoes."

Yang cracked her knuckles, hair sparking. "Whoever took her is getting punched into next week."

Pyrrha stood rigid in the doorway, spear gripped too tight. "We should split up. I'll take the training fields—"

The door slid open with a cheerful ding.

Mint strolled in like she owned the place, black hair bouncing, a playful glint in her mismatched eyes. On her hip sat Mia, happily licking a massive strawberry-chocolate swirl cone, both cheeks smeared with ice cream and a sticky grin on her face. Mint's other hand held an identical cone for herself.

Silence crashed over the room.

Jaune's scroll clattered to the floor. "MIA ARC!"

Mia's ears drooped instantly. "Papa…?"

Jaune crossed the room in three strides, voice tight but controlled. "You cannot just disappear like that! No note, no telling anyone, nothing! We thought someone took you! Mint, you can't just—!"

Mia's lip wobbled. The ice cream started to drip forgotten onto the floor as big tears welled in her blue eyes. "I-I'm sorry… Mint said it was a surprise… and ice cream…"

The tears spilled over.

Jaune's anger evaporated like mist. He dropped to his knees and pulled her into his arms, cone and all, hugging her tight against his hoodie.

"Hey, hey, shhh. I'm not mad at you, kitten. I was scared. I love you so much and I got really worried. You can't run off without telling me, okay? Promise?"

Mia sniffled into his shoulder, nodding hard.

"Promise…"

Mint watched the whole thing with a soft, almost shy expression. She lifted her hands and signed slowly and clearly so everyone could see:

<I'm sorry. I thought it would be fun. She was safe the whole time.>

Jaune exhaled, still holding Mia close, and gave Mint a tired but genuine look. "I know you care about her. I do. Just… next time, tell someone. Please."

Mint's smirk returned, slow and dangerous. She signed again, then rested one hand boldly on Jaune's shoulder, leaning in with a wink hot enough to melt steel.

<As recompense… I could always give her a little sibling.>

The room exploded.

Ruby squeaked so loud her voice cracked. "EXCUSE ME?!"

Yang's hair flared like a bonfire. "Oh you did NOT just—"

Weiss's rapier half-unsheathed with an icy chime. "You absolute harlot—!"

Blake's shadows multiplied in outrage. "Mint, I swear on every book I own—"

Pyrrha's spear slammed tip-down into the floor hard enough to crack the tile. Her voice was dangerously calm.

"I will politely ask you to remove your hand from his shoulder before I politely remove your arm."

Nora, from her perch on the couch, cackled like a hyena. "Ten lien says she actually does it!"

Ren just sipped his tea, hiding a tiny, amused smile behind the cup.

"Sucker bet."

Jaune remained frozen, bright red from neck to ears, mouth opening and closing with zero sound coming out. Mia, still tucked against his chest, looked up curiously.

"Papa, what's a harlot?"

Jaune made a strangled noise.

Mint just winked again, gave his shoulder one last playful squeeze, and sauntered out the door like she hadn't just dropped a live grenade into the middle of the room.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The small train yard on the outskirts of Vale was quiet under the late afternoon sun, the only sounds the distant rumble of a freight train and the occasional creak of metal. RWBY and JNPR stood in a loose semicircle near an old loading platform, weapons at the ready.

Adam Taurus stepped out from behind a rusted cargo container, Wilt and Blush already drawn, red hair catching the light like fresh blood.

"Adam!" Blake cried, "At last you show yourself and at last we can-!"

Adam scowled at Jaune.

"What the hell are you doing, Jaune?!"

Jaune blinked. As did everyone else.

"Huh?"

"Did all our debate and fighting mean nothing?!" Adam demanded angrily. "Would you toss me aside for someone new so soon?!"

Blake, at first upset... Turned bright red. Weiss soon followed suit. Pyrrha was not far behind.

Jaune was just confused.

"What are you talking about Adam?!"

"I'm talking about TYRIAN!" Adam snarled, holding up his Scroll and showing an image of the mad scorpion Faunus fighting Jaune. "Your 'new rival'?"

Jaune gaped in stunned disbelief.

"What?! NO! Of course he isn't my new rival!"

Ruby tilted her head. "How did you even find out about Tyrian?"

Adam's lips curled into a sneer. "I read your tweets, Ruby Rose."

The rest of RWBY slowly turned to glare at their leader.

Ruby winced, shrinking into her hood. "I've… gotta stay off the Twotter…"

Adam ignored her, eyes locking onto Jaune with theatrical fury.

"More to the point… JAUNE! How could you betray me like that?! A rival like Tyrian?!"

Jaune raised both hands quickly. "It's not what you think, Adam! He challenged me!"

Adam growled. "What does he have to offer you that I can't?!"

Jaune rubbed the back of his neck, looking genuinely apologetic. "Honestly, he was pretty disappointing… We had to teach him philosophy from scratch. He was just this general nihilistic guy with a thing for Goth MILFs…"

Adam recoiled as if slapped. "A likely story! How could the assassin of the Queen of Darkness not be well-read? I bet you're already thinking of replacing me with him!"

Jaune stepped forward. "Adam, you got it all wrong!"

Blake crossed her arms, ears flat. "Why weren't you this upset when I ran off?!"

Adam turned to her, expression almost wounded. "Blake! Please! Girlfriends are one thing, but rivals are eternal!"

Blake's jaw dropped. "I'M LITERALLY THE HEIRESS TO THE THRONE OF MENAGERIE!"

Adam blinked. "You told me it was a constitutional monarchy and you weren't a princess."

"WELL I AM!"

Weiss raised an elegant eyebrow. "Now you admit your family is basically running a monarchy?"

"SHUT UP! WE ARE NOT!"

Jaune cleared his throat loudly, trying to regain control. "I'm sorry about that, Adam. Listen, I didn't want you to think I'd moved on, because you're still my rival! Tyrian's… We're trying to make him Ruby's rival, but it's slow going."

Ruby pumped her fist. "Yeah! I need a rival to be a proper hero!"

Adam looked skeptical. "Oh. I see… You're trying to mentor her with that scorpion reprobate?"

Jaune winced. "Hey! So he's a genocidal misanthropic mass murderer! He's… uh… Um… Hmmm…"

Adam crossed his arms. "Are you sure he's an appropriate rival for Ruby? He seems a bit much for her first-"

"UGH! I'M NOT A LITTLE KID!" Ruby shouted.

Yang shrugged. "I have concerns too. It helps that he doesn't care."

"YEAH-HEY!"

Weiss sighed. "Yes, that's the takeaway."

Jaune held up his hands again. "But I didn't want you to think you weren't still my rival, Adam! Here-I got you some awesome theme music!"

Adam's ears perked slightly. "How awesome?"

Jaune pulled out his scroll and hit play.

The iconic, heavy, brooding theme of Deathstalker by Bear McCreary rolled out across the train yard—dark strings, pounding percussion, and a sense of inevitable doom brought to life by a bitchin' guitar solo.

Adam listened for a moment… then began humming along, eyes half-closed in appreciation.

"…I do like the lyrics. Is this from a movie or something?"

Jaune stared at him in disbelief. "You haven't seen it?!"

Adam shrugged. "I have not."

Jaune's face lit up. "IT'S AWESOME! We gotta go see it!"

Weiss pinched the bridge of her nose. "Shouldn't we take the armed terrorist into custody or something?!"

Jaune waved her off. "I mean… having him watch a movie with us is kind of like that, right?"

Blake's eyes sparkled with sudden excitement. "YES! And then he can take me hostage and you have an epic battle for me and then he makes his daring escape!"

Yang snorted. "Wow. Always have to be the center of attention, huh, Kitty Kat?"

Blake puffed up. "I'M HIS GIRLFRIEND, DAMNIT!"

Adam gave her a flat look. "Ex-girlfriend."

Blake's ears flattened.

The train yard fell into a strange, awkward silence—broken only by the low, dramatic swell of the Deathstalker theme still playing from Jaune's scroll.

Adam tilted his head, listening to the music again.

"…We should watch the movie. But only if I get to sit next to you, Jaune. Rivals share the best seats."

Jaune grinned. "Deal."

Pyrrha, Weiss, Yang, Ruby and Blake all stepped forward at the same time, surrounding Jaune protectively.

Pyrrha smiled sweetly. "We'll all be sitting next to him."

Adam sighed, sheathing his sword with a dramatic flourish.

"Fine. But I'm not bringing popcorn."

"We've got it!" Nora waved.

"It comes in handy around Jaune and the others," Ren added.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The academy cafeteria was quieter than usual during the midday lull, most students still in morning lectures or out on field exercises. JNPR and RWBY had left at dawn for a multi-day training mission in the Emerald Forest, and the absence of their usual noise left a strange hush over Beacon.

Glynda Goodwitch had cleared her schedule between classes to collect Mia from the daycare. The little girl was waiting by the door, ears drooping, clutching her stuffed bunny like a lifeline.

"Miss Goodwitch!" the daycare attendant called cheerfully. "She's been asking for her papa every ten minutes."

Glynda's stern expression softened by a fraction as she knelt to Mia's level. "Come along, little one. We'll have lunch, and then you can help me sort some paperwork until your father returns."

Mia nodded silently and slipped her small hand into Glynda's. They hadn't spoken the whole trip to the cafeteria.

They claimed a quiet corner table near the windows. Glynda set Mia on the bench beside her, then thought better of it and lifted the child into her lap instead, adjusting her posture so Mia could lean comfortably against her chest. A simple lunch arrived for the child-chicken soup, soft bread, and sliced fruit-but Mia only poked at the bowl with her spoon, swirling the broth without much interest.

Glynda noticed immediately. She dipped the spoon herself, blew gently on it, and held it to Mia's lips. "One bite for your papa. Another for your aunties. They're working very hard today."

Mia opened her mouth reluctantly and took the spoonful.

"Are Papa and my aunties okay?" she asked in a small voice after swallowing.

Glynda's hand paused only a moment before scooping another bite.

"I am quite sure they are fine. Your father and his friends are capable. I trained them myself, after all. They know how to watch each other's backs."

Mia took the next bite a little more willingly, but her ears stayed flat.

"But… what if a big Grimm comes?"

Glynda helped her with another spoonful, wiping a stray drop from Mia's chin with a napkin.

"It is okay to worry, Mia. Worry shows you care. But I pushed them harder than most."

Mainly to keep them on task and from causing more trouble, but Glynda didn't say that. Instead:

"They are very capable. Now eat, or your father will scold me for letting you skip lunch."

Mia managed a few more bites, leaning heavier into Glynda's embrace. After a quiet moment she asked, "Do you worry about your mommy and daddy?"

Glynda's hand stilled. She set the spoon down and sighed, a long, weary sound that carried years behind it.

"I haven't worried for them in a very long time," she said softly. "They passed away a long time ago."

Mia blinked up at her, big blue eyes wide.

"Like my Mama?"

Glynda nodded once.

"Yes. Like your mama."

She stroked one of Mia's fluffy ears with a gentle thumb, the motion slow and soothing. Mia closed her eyes and leaned in as Glynda continued.

"I worried about them many times when I was younger. They worried about me too. But I worked very hard so they would not have to. I wanted to be strong enough to protect them."

Mia tilted her head.

"Did you protect them?"

Glynda was silent for a long moment. Her gaze drifted to the window, to the distant treeline. She saw, for just a heartbeat, the memory she tried never to visit: the empty, torn-open house on the outskirts of her parents' village just beyond Vale. The splintered door hanging from one hinge. The dark smears across the floor. The two bodies she had found when she arrived too late after the Grimm attack.

She shook her head once, sharply, banishing the image, and pulled Mia closer, wrapping both arms around the small girl in a tight hug.

"Yes," Glynda whispered against Mia's hair. "I did."

Mia hugged her back, small arms tight around Glynda's neck.

"Your father will come back," Glynda said firmly, voice steady again.

"I know!" Mia replied, muffled against her shoulder. "He promised… but I still worry!"

Glynda's lips curved in the faintest, saddest smile. She pressed a kiss to the top of Mia's head, right between her ears.

"You always do," she murmured.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Athena Nikos came to Beacon to visit her daughter in person. She found her on the green, relaxing with her team and RWBY. Jaune was strumming his guitar as Orleans grazed nearby.

Pyrrha: "Mother!"

Pyrrha rose. Athena frowned deeply.

Athena: "Pyrrha... That incident where you ran off with your team leader... That was very reckless! The tabloids already think you're having an affair!"

Pyrrha: "I uh... Um..."

Jaune stands up.

Jaune: "Sorry about that, ma'am. Weren't my intention. But if Pyrrha wanted to get some air, I ain't gonna impede her."

Athena: raised eyebrow "I suppose that's... Admirable. But show some decorum next time!"

Jaune: "Yes ma'am. I'll keep that in mind."

Pyrrha: smiles softly at him

Nora: "I mean, we did help save Vale so maybe we're allowed to go around Vale on a flying horse? And take photos with sloths in the zoo enclosure?"

Jaune: "A maybe on the first, Nora. No on the last one."

Nora: pouts

Athena: sighs "Well... I'm hoping we could try another recording session. You have the skills as a singer, Pyrrha!"

Pyrrha: "Well... Um... I don't know..."

Jaune: "You do have a pretty voice, Pyrrha."

Pyrrha: "I suppose I'm just not sold on pop songs. After all, I wouldn't want to step on Weiss' toes."

Weiss: scowls "Oh?"

Pyrrha: "Yes."

Athena: "Oh! What about a duet, Miss Schnee? Surely you two get along well! Just think of it-A wonderful come back with my lovely daughter!"

Weiss: "I..." At Pyrrha's quiet pleading expression, she clears her throat "I'd... Have to talk it over with my agents. But honestly, I'm trying to focus on my studies these days."

Athena: "So is Pyrrha! Come now, everyone loves a comeback!"

Nora: "OH! OH! OH! Maybe Pyrrha could sing cowboy songs like Jaune!"

Athena: "'Cowboy Songs'?"

If skepticism had a human avatar, it would be Athena Nikos. Jaune coughed.
Jaune: "Ahhh... Just... You don't always have good reception on the road so you gotta make yer own music. I like it myself."

Pyrrha: "He's quite good, actually!"

Weiss: "Yes... He has some skill."

Athena: "Very well. Sing for me, Mister Arc."

Jaune: "Er... Yes ma'am, if you insist."

Jaune strums his guitar and begins to sing.

Jaune: "The sun is sinking in the west
The cattle go down to the stream
The redwing settles in the nest
It's time for a cowboy to dream..."
Orleans begins to sway with the music... As do Pyrrha, Ren, Nora, Weiss, Ruby, Blake and Yang.

Jaune: "Purple light in the canyons
That's where I long to be
With my three good companions
Just my rifle, pony and me

Gonna hang (gonna hang) my sombrero (my sombrero)
On the limb (on the limb) of a tree (of a tree)
Comin' home (comin' home) sweetheart darlin' (sweetheart darlin')
Just my rifle, pony and me..."
Athena raises an eyebrow and looks a bit misty eyed.

Jaune: "(Whippoorwill in the willow
Sings a sweet melody
Riding to Amarillo)
Just my rifle, pony and me
No more cows (no more cows) to be ropened (to be ropened)
No more strays will I see
Round the bend (round the bend) she'll be waitin' (she'll be waitin')
For my rifle, pony and me
For my rifle, my pony and me...
Just my rifle, my pony and me..."

Jaune stops. The spell is broken. Athena blinks her eyes rapidly, and shakes her head.

Athena: "Ahem... Well... That's quite impressive, Mister Arc."

Jaune: "Shucks ma'am. Just a lot of practice."

Athena: "Hmmm... Have you considered becoming a professional? You and Pyrrha could be a perfect duet couple!"

Pyrrha: bright red, happy!

Weiss: bright red, angry!

Yang: Eyes red

Ruby: scowls

Blake: scowl

Nora: "Would it make him rich enough to build me a pancake castle?"

Athena: "... Possibly!"

Nora: "I say go for it, Jaune-Jaune!"

Jaune: "I uh-Again, ma'am, trying to focus on my studies!"

Weiss: "Yes! He is!" grabs Jaune's arm

Yang: "He's the most studious guy you'll ever find!" Hugs him from behind

Ruby: "Yeah! Also we need to work on our homework for Weapons Class!"

Jaune: "Eh? But we ain't gotta do it for another-URK!"

Ruby: "NOW!"

Ruby drags him off, as Yang and Weiss pursue. Blake, Nora and Ren follow after, looking amused or resigned. Orleans trots off after them. Pyrrha scowls a bit after them. She sees Athena staring at her, and flushes.

Pyrrha: "Ahem... Um..."

Athena: "... I see..."

Pyrrha: "N-No! No, w-we're just good friends-!"

Athena: "And is that all you want, Pyrrha?"

Pyrrha: "... No..."

Athena: "Then I suggest you get in there and take that cowboy."

Pyrrha: "B-But what about the tabloids?"

Athena: "Sometimes you must risk the tabloids for everything!"

A pause.

Athena: "Plus, if you don't go for him, I WILL."

Pyrrha: "MOTHER?!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The little bakery Taiyang Xiao Long had impulsively purchased sat on a quiet corner of Vale's commercial district, its fresh-painted sign reading Xiao Long Buns in cheerful yellow letters. Demand had exploded almost overnight—partly because the pastries were genuinely excellent, and partly because word had spread that the owner and his "very enthusiastic helpers" had a habit of working shirtless on hot days.

Taiyang wiped sweat from his brow behind the counter, flour dusting his bare chest. "Geez, it's so frigging hot!"

Jaune, working the register beside him in nothing but an apron and jeans, nodded vigorously. "I know, right?!" He pulled off his own shirt and tossed it aside without a second thought.

They emerged from the back carrying trays of fresh-baked goods—golden croissants, sticky cinnamon rolls, and thick meat pies still steaming. A line of customers (mostly women) had already formed outside the door.

The next day, the line stretched halfway down the block.

- - -

In Ozpin's office at Beacon, the headmaster stared at the latest expenditure report with the weary expression of a man who had seen far too much.

"…Glynda," he said slowly, "why did we spend forty-three percent of our discretionary budget on 'baked goods' this last month?"

Glynda Goodwitch, standing ramrod straight beside his desk, said nothing. Her cheeks were faintly pink.

Ozpin adjusted his glasses. "Glynda?"

She turned on her heel and marched straight out of the office without another word.

Oobleck zipped into the room at blinding speed, coffee mug in hand. "IS THAT WHERE THE COFFEE FUNDS WENT?!"

"Seems so," Ozpin sighed.

- - -

Ruby and Yang had taken over the shop for the day while Taiyang was "handling important business." Jaune, ever helpful, had volunteered to stay and assist.

Weiss walked in, took one look at the counter, and froze.

"WH-WHAT?! WHERE ARE YOUR-ARE YOU WEARING A NAKED APRON?!"

Jaune blinked, wiping his hands on his apron. "No, I just don't have a shirt. It's too hot! There's a ventilation issue."

Yang leaned over the counter in nothing but a sports bra and apron, grinning. "I have a bra on, princess! And the apron!"

Ruby popped up beside her, also apron-only over a tank top. "Me too!"

Pyrrha slammed a handful of Lien onto the counter, face burning.

Jaune smiled. "Pyrrha, you didn't say what you want-"

"You pick."

"But-!"

"You pick," Pyrrha insisted.

Blake stood a little further back, ears twitching. "Huh… I guess I'm kind of desensitized due to… some reason…"

The bell above the door jingled as Sun walked in. "Hey Jaune! Banana bread ready for me?"

"Sure is, Sun!"

"There's the reason," Weiss snarked.

"Shut up," Blake muttered, red.

CRDL and CFVY lingered near the back of the shop, looking increasingly tired of the entire situation.

Cardin muttered, "I just wanted some donuts, man…"

Velvet, along with the rest of her team and CRDL, echoed in tired unison: "Ditto…"

Jaune brought out a tray of fresh donuts. One of them burst, squirting cream filling straight across his chest.

"GAH! RUBY! YOU PUT TOO MUCH IN!"

Ruby beamed. "No such thing!"

Jaune sighed and pulled off the apron to wipe himself down, revealing his sweaty, flour-dusted upper body.

Velvet's ears perked straight up. She drooled a little.

Coco lowered her shades. "……Nice."

Cardin threw his hands in the air. "DAMNIT JAUNE, COVER UP!"

Jaune blinked. "What? What?!"

"COVER UP, YOU-YOU WEIRDO! IT'S A SAFETY OSHA VIOLATION OR-OR SOMETHING!"

Weiss was openly drooling, as was Pyrrha.

Yang looked smug as hell (and bright red).

Ren turned to Yang with a deadpan expression. "So… where is your dad anyways?"

Yang opened her mouth-then paused.

Nora popped up from behind the counter. "Probably off putting a bun in the oven."

Ruby tilted her head. "What? He's not here though."

Yang shrugged. "Yeah, he said he wanted to meet with Goodwitch about some kind of partnership with Beacon Academy for Vy-"

She froze. Her brain put together a lot of terrible implications.

Jaune yelped as Nora suddenly sprayed him with a bottle of olive oil. "ACK! NORA! WHY'D YOU SPRAY ME WITH OLIVE OIL?!"

Nora grinned maniacally. "THE ECONOMY!"

Jaune stared at her. "The hell are you talking about-?!"

"RAISE THE GDP, JAUNE!"

Jaune threw his hands up. "THAT'S NOT WHAT THAT MEANS! ACK! STOP!"

Yang, momentarily distracted by the glistening, shirtless Jaune, blinked. "…Wha… What were we talking about?"

Weiss, still staring, muttered, "Could you… theoretically… get him to wear chocolate sauce? N-Not that I'm interested in him but it might… be… y-you know… Oh my…"

Pyrrha slammed more money onto the counter.

Ruby grinned. "Oh, we'll find a way~!"