I have taken to saying "within tolerances" whenever anyone asks how I'm doing, neither wanting to lie by saying I'm doing well, nor to worry them overmuch.
Basically, I am grappling with some very challenging and conceptually difficult stuff in my final semester of Uni, (Quantum mechanics, relativity, and Japanese focussing on their complex, hierarchy-driven business/formal/polite form of speech), and for the first time in some time I feel at serious risk of failing a course. That's hard enough, bit I'm also having to find a job for the first time in 5 years, to support myself through the final stages of my degree (my government will support students while studying up to a point, but no further than a semester longer than their degree's minimum completion time and my schedule got bollixedup by extra prereqs.)
So while I work on those, I have to figure out What The Fuck I'm Doing With The Rest of My Life, and start lining things up for it.
Complicating all of this is the fact that I have a home loan, having bought a house in partnership with my father and his partner, and renting it out room-by-room.
Neat in principle, and all, but even when fully-tenanted, the rent would probably not be enough to cover much more than the interest, so it is currently not being paid off. Add to that the fact that it was not the original plan for my father to have been actual partners, and they would prefer it if I was able to take over the loan as soon as possible. which means I feel like I am under pressure to score a paying graduate gig as soon as possible, and don't have the luxury of taking time off between uni and a capital-J Job.
Then there's the fact that my sleep patterns, diet and exercise, and ability to carry out asocial life, let alone love life could be charitably described as "completely fucked", as has been increasingly preying on my mind.
So, yeah, I have to be trying to deal with some weighty shit while feeling both long-term and short-term financially insecure, trying to keep up with difficult studies, and trying to cobble together some semblance of humanity from the very limited tools at my disposal, and in general not really being able to muster the time or the proper mindset to think about it properly. The whole thing leaves me in nigh-constant stress and anxiety, which is not helping my ability to get anything at all done.
I remain unbroken, if abraded, so I am doing within tolerances, but I am not doing well.