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Biigoh

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  • For all that Akira Toriyama is a hack at writing plot, he's got one thing right, like, most wuxia stories want to have competitions, but barely any of them have a "world's strongest" or whatever kind of tournament, so it's like you know
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    d.fish
    d.fish
    But nothing like a "天下第一" or something you know, it's always something lesss
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    d.fish
    d.fish
    I mean, there are shows or people in the setting who call themselves strongest in the world/best under heaven, whatever, but there's never really a tournament for this in wuxia specifically, because wuxia is more about jianghu, which is a focus on social skills, rather than hot blood shonen battle, the martial arts is just a vehicle for socialization in ancient settings
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    True
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    They say that old tanukian rulers used to believe biigohs didn't get dirty in the water so they used biigoh necks to wipe their balls after leafy
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    Borks and rebels against the youngster old tanukian rulers!
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    They say that old russian rulers used to believe swans didn't get dirty in the water so they used swan necks to wipe their butts after poopy
    She and you had an engagement at birth, and she had double spirits, jade beauty, innate full spiritual power, born with innate supreme bones, a strange old ring, a mysterious jade bottle, excellent talent, nine dragons chariot, etc. but something happened three years ago causing her to become ugly and wasted and useless and incapable of cultivation.

    So you're on your way to break the engagement with her right now.
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    .... Lawd
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    30 li east! 30 li west! dun booli the young girl or the poor!
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    I feel like I'm starting to hate main characters that unnecessarily stay low key to "avoid trouble" when doing so causes more trouble than just showing off
    It seems like every cheater gains a drop of pangu essence blood, it's like there's a billion systems sucking on pangu's blood no wonder he died after making the world
    I saw this one historical one that really got me inspired to write (almost), basically an isekai without cheats, helps a powerless figurehead boy-emperor into becoming powerful, becomes prime minister, but emperor doesn't trust him anymore, so he heads off to mongolia and starts a steppe kingdom and fights back, it's AU!sevenkingdoms/warring states era, uplifts with ironblooded cavalry and barbarian girls
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    d.fish
    d.fish
    I mean, after he got cucked by the emperor of his position, status, and all his stuff, and the emperor's sister didn't help him despite them being engaged and tried to make him go beg and kneel and act like a dog, he did get a "difficult choice system", but that's forgivable, right?
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    Lol... Yesh
    In mythology, the ancestral dragon was such a huge pervert or perhaps just welsh, he fucked cows, chickens, turtles, fish, etc. etc. that he had nine different species as descendants

    I saw this one Toriko x Jujutsu Kaisen crossover where all curse spirits are actually food ingredients
    The Chinese translation of "Scarlet Monastery" turns out to be "血色修道院", which is literally "Blood-Colored Cultivating Dao Courtyard", it's like you don't even need to do any tweaks, just change aesthetics and a setting is a different genre
    I read this one story where MC isekaied to an alternate "real" world, but everyone seems to be chuunibyou, thinking they're xianxia cultivators, when in reality, MC reality warps and interacts with the world differently, so people's elixirs is a loaf of bread to MC, or dharma weapons are smartphones, etc. and MC's loli little sister claims she's a reincarnated immortal empress, swings an umbrella in rainboots
    I saw this one system that I kind of like; MC gets a "power" system, not like personal power but like organization/gang/country/etc. kind of power, and he starts off killing off the other gangs in 80's HK, then he goes to Rot3K and takes over a couple provinces in Han China, and then a planet in some scifi setting, and there's permagates between worlds kind of thing

    very comfy to read
    TBH there's one skill that's like from a xianxia sect but in wuxia setting that's kind of been OP as fuck and never really all that noticed or replicated, that is the Lingbo Weibu in Tianlong Babu, it's a "light skill", that is a movement ability, that makes you fast enough to leave afterimages, dodge attacks, but also, you become more energetic as you use it, like if you gained EXP by walking in a game
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    d.fish
    d.fish
    It works in tandem with the other skills of the xiaoyao sect; divine art of northern darkness allows you to absorb qi from every meridian so you can even take other people's skills, the never aging eternal youth skill lets you live forever, minor formless skill lets you copy any ability with greater effect, together, you basically are cultivating immortality
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    Yeahhh...
    d.fish
    d.fish

    What's not listed here is that there's a skill called "Xiaoyao Yufeng Jue" that's supposed to be the sum of those inner cultivation skills that's supposed to be the real xiuxian, like everyone else is throwing around kicks and fists while people in this sect are flying and shooting beams
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    You know, I think about that phoenix boy from DXD sometimes, his sister gets stolen, his harem lost, he loses his fiancee. It's like an urban villain, you know?

    A better story would be that he marries Rias, she never lets him touch her, and one night, he comes home early, only to find her in bed with that retard Issei, that eunuch Gasper, and that idiot Yuuto at the same time
    Buiigohed as a reincarnation
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    Borks at the Lord God Space Samsara watch on paw...
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    d.fish
    d.fish
    This damned Main Biigoh Space forcing us to Biigoh over and over again...
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    But you get LEAF points? that you can spend to buy BIIGOH treats and snacks
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    [Now You See Me] and the following heist movie have such silly titles, whereas in Chinese, they picked a really poetic one, 出神入化, which has too much meaning it's kind of gross to use on such films
    Tianlong Babu (Demi-Gods and Semi-Devils) has three sad MCs:

    1. "First Simp of the entire Wuxia genre" Duan Yu
    2. "Accidentally killed my wife thinking she was her father" Xiao Feng
    3. "Monk who NTR'd himself repeatedly" Xu Zhu

    And they were each fucked over by their dads, but it's well liked by wuxia fans for some reason, especially after the author kept editing and changing the female characters' personalities...
    People don't like the "pokemon in real world" genre compared to "pokemon in pokemon games/show/manga" genre, but if you think about it, Detective Pikachu world is basically just "pokemon in real world" hmmm
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    magic9mushroom
    magic9mushroom
    I'm reminded of this thread (maybe back on SB, before QQ happened? Can't find it, though) where somebody asked "what would happen if Pokemon showed up in the real world" and one of the better answers amounted to...
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    magic9mushroom
    magic9mushroom
    ..."assuming Pokeballs can be invented, our world basically turns into the Pokemon world, with the state and large-scale infrastructure disintegrating due to the super-dangerous wildlife and the democratisation of WMDs, and upward mobility consisting of obtaining your own stash of WMDs".
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    I found this one story where MC isekais to Pokemon game, and they don't have records of Shiny Rayquaza in pokedex, so MC introduces it as a mutated caterpie
    Even though they're different stories, it seems like Demigods and Semi-Devils happened 1120's, and then like 70 years later, The Condor Heroes happened, and then 20 years later, Return of the Condor Heroes happened, and then like 80 years later, Heaven Sword and Dragon Saber happened, Deer and Cauldron happened 380 years later in the 1670's, and then Yue Girl Sword happened 500 BC or something
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    d.fish
    d.fish
    But for some fucking reason, those people writing these "gestalt wuxia" worlds always mesh these settings into happening all at the same time, like is it that obvious China hasn't had any tech upgrades in such a long time?
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    Well... It's like all those medical stories taking place at once
    I really like the Chinese onomatopoeic for a loli crying, you know, the wuwuwu, like 呜呜呜
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    Little Loli. Big brother tanuki is here... Who booli you?
    Maybe telling the story from a different POV might work, like instead of "I am the Fated Villain" or "I am the Villain in the City" or whatever, you could have "I am a Villain System"
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    Biigoh
    Biigoh
    I the villain protag am working hard to subvert the society I live in
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