Governor's Gambit - Star Wars SI into Imperial Governor

[vtkun]

thanks for the chapter

 

[RedDeadShyguy]

Seems a tad out of character for Las, I presume this was someone overhearing him muttering about the current situation and decided to take some liberties, kind of how a certain group of knights decided on dealing with this "troublesome priest" the king was on about.

 

[OrderedOrb]

My first ever attempt at trying an omake. Please enjoy.

I'm imagining this Las to be one who made it to sector moff. He tried to do a runner the moment the emperor died, but got a big ole slap of shame and reality as he realized how much he came to care for the systems and people he put work into.

Basically, in this timeline, he's gone from: "I don't want to die because of stupid galactic politics" to "I don't want myself or the people under my care to die because of stupid galactic politics."

I'm aware that even with this allowance this is still to eye-catching for Las's personality, but once the idea came into my head I couldn't get it out.

---

Omake: Armed Neutrality

Posted across the holonet in the days following the collapse of the Empire into the Imperial Remnants:

To all the esteemed Moffs of the Imperial Remnants and to all the distinguished Senators of the Alliance to Restore the Republic,

Kindly kriff off.

We of the Myto Sector have received your numerous appeals for us to honor ourselves by offering you Imperial supplication, or to free ourselves of oppression by tending ourselves to your Senatorial care - sent to us rarely by your own acclaimed hands but instead penned by some unpaid and uncared for intern.

We have heard well the Principles professed by Moffs, of the need to bring order and stability to a galaxy teething with Ruinous Anarchy. We have heard well the Ideals professed by Senators, that an ocean of blood must be spent to wet the Tree of Liberty so we might one day be fit to sit in its shade.

To this, let me inform a candid galaxy: Principles and Ideals are pyramid schemes, sold by the rich and egotistical to the destitute and downtrodden, invented so the elite may feel glorious and moral as they send others to die in their place - for the advancement of their power and their own goals.

The Great Question of our times - that which burns in the hearts of uncounting sentients with the fervor of a thousand suns - is whether we will be ruled by some tyrannical Moffs who live in far offworld palaces, or whether we will be ruled by some thoughtless Senators who live in far offworld penthouses.

To this, We of the Myto Sector, have decided we would be happily ruled by our own selves for our own purposes. So to all the gracious offers we have recieved, be certain of our refusal.

We are aware that to many this declaration might seem foolish and shortsighted. Indeed, the galaxy is teeming with fleets and warships uncounting, as well as callous men and women eager to put them to use. What hope could the tiny Myto Sector have of victory against them? None.

But we can make our defeat hurt.

We will not pledge ourselves to die in far off worlds, killing men and women we have no quarrel with, for the benefits of unseen masters. But our own homes, our own families, and our own livelihoods? This we'll defend. With a zeal and purpose unmatched in the history of the galaxy, ancient or current. Enough damage will be wrought in our downfall that the next time war comes against our conquerors - a certainty in times such as these - they will be the ones too weak to resist.

So to all you Carrion Lords of the Galaxy - whether cloaked in Imperial red or Republic blue - consider carefully just how necessary our tiny sector is to your ambitious plans, and take a moment to do the smart thing. Let someone else try first.

Kind regards, and also fuck you,

Las Mola in unanimous declaration with The People of the Myto Sector.

Click to shrink...

FUCKING PERFECTION.

 

[ScarredPunLover]

Can't wait for "This, We'll Defend" to be made the motto of the Myto Sector Defense Fleet. Such a minor bit of this... declaration, but still one I think will be quoted by others. After, of course, "Kindly kriff off" and "and also fuck you," but still.

I also like the Doctor Who reference with the "let someone else try first." (or, at least, that's where I recognize it first.)

I'm randomly reminded of the Robot Chicken Death Star Escalator bit. Except instead of "M'Lord"/"Stormtrooper" over and over again, it's these various demands/invitations/requests/declarations, and Mola's various refusals just devolve into the expected "Go fuck yourself" as well as "kill yourselves," "kriff off," and various others besides. And, just to complete the bit, maybe there's someone who had been seeking a legit alliance but is also hit with Mola's tired refusal, and they thus take the place of the one Stormtrooper that cried.

Or something to that effect. I dunno.

 

[PotatOS2]

The rise of Darth Vtoober is inevitable!!! Kek

 

[Yacov]

Omake: Scrapping the Barrel

POV: Vio, Andrennian petty crime lord,
above Zeek's Holochess Parlor, Edin, Edinspire
0ABY.

"Alright Mwork. Your earnings have been down from last month, what's going on?"

Vio did his best to glare at the Aqualish, but it had less of an impact after moving out of his old hideout. The Purge had hit all the gangs hard and Vio had to downsize his operations in response to the downturn.

"There just ain't any work for muscle anymore boss. Arms and Spice dealers are an endangered species these days, so that market has dried up. Those Vigos that are still around have their own sources. B&E is getting riskier with the holonet hotline the new governor has set up. There just ain't any other work besides being a flareboy or stalking alleys, which is above your risk profile."

Vio didn't even have it in him to fake being mad at Mwork. Times were hard all around. The governor's new infrastructure program and crackdown had made life difficult for a common thug like Mwork.

Taking in the Aqualish had been a bit of risk. His former gang had been one the first to get hit when the Purge started. However Mwork proved able to keep his head down and had a sense for trouble. Which is more than most thugs are capable of.

"What about on your end Little Nii? Find some chumps to nip?"

The adolescent Rodian was not the biggest earner in Vio's network. However she was a skilled enough finger-smith to keep a consistent flow of money by fencing her hauls.

"Still holding strong boss. There might be more police around than before, however the streets are as packed with marks as ever."

At least something is going Vio's way. Little Nii should be able to be a consistent earner for a few years yet. The new crop of Imps seem to go easier on kids than the last.

"Right! Now where's that slimeball Ovil? He was supposed to report in yesterday."

Little Nii shuffled her feet. A tell that she would have to break if she was going to survive this new environment. Maybe Vio should clean her out of her earnings in Sabacc a few times to teach her.

"Ovil ran afoul of a used 501-Z the precinct has patrolling the main streets. Their nonlethal protocols aren't so comforting when those 2 meter slabs of durasteel are jamming their stun sticks up your spine. Sounds like he isn't seeing the outside of a cell for a decade at minimum."

"What!? He was dealing in roasted Thyssel bark! That's barely above F tier! You could get a harder drug from a pharmacist after breaking a finger! How did that happen?"

"A new school was built nearby the route Ovil was using that he probably didn't know about. The Zed smelled the roasted Thyssel bark on him, and since the raw stuff is a much harder drug…"

"They assumed the slythmonger was using the roasted stuff as a gateway drug for harder substances. Being a slythmonger is one thing, but being a slythmonger who deals to kids gets stormtroopers kicking in your door."

One rule every criminal on Edin learned real quick when the new governor started cracking down: don't touch kids. Even trying doesn't just get the PSF on you, it brings in the military. The Mynock Maws were made a very graphic example of when crikking LECAs showed up to shut down their operation.

Who would even use Thyssel Bark as a sampler? As if some brats could afford something that high end. That stuff doesn't just grow on trees!

Acquiring the Thyssel bark from the Adriardo stash when they got busted was supposed to cover this quarter's expenses. The few high end clients that still talked to Vio were expecting him to make those deliveries.

Kriff! Vio couldn't afford to be losing employees like this. A black marketeer like him lived and died on his ability to move product. If he ghosted any more clients and suppliers, he'd lose what little street cred he had left.

Alright Vio, calm down and breathe. Steeple every one of your hands and think. Being able to plan, react, and adapt was how you got through the Purge so far, it is what will keep you alive now.

The Black Market was looking more barren by the day. The shortages were reaching levels that under normal circumstances was the prelude to a syndicate announcing they had a monopoly. Only difference was it was occurring across all levels.

X-rated goods were constantly out of supply even for those with the most desperate of appetites. Drugs were at an all time low. A hold full of Spice could sell enough to buy a small corvette if it was sold to the highest bidder, but even then no one was willing to take the chance.

Meanwhile the new stormtrooper armor was at a premium, but the garrison kept their supply close to their chest. Slaves were so star hot that most criminals would sooner shoot a slaver than risk Imps kicking in their door. Outlaw techs were taking advantage of the chaos to go straight, taking jobs in preparation of those shipyards coming in instead of installing smuggling compartments.

The R market wasn't doing much better. Flesh Camouflage kits were bought up as soon as they hit the market by every con artist and thief trying to fool Imperial scanners. Blasters past civilian grade were getting harder and harder to acquire, let alone explosives.

Guilders could acquire such things easily enough, but you would have to pry it out of their cold dead hands to get it from them. The heat and the automatic RIII contract from the Guild put out on their murderer was as good as a Death Mark on Edin.

Even the F market were taking a hit, which was about as criminal as lying about your taxes. It was getting to the point where people were willing to pay the subscription fees to corps rather than paying a visit to a friendly data-courier for a bootleg-holo.

"This used to be a nice planet. Where a crew of hard working criminals could earn a dishonest living. What happened?"

——

A look into the other side of Veers' war on crime. Keep in mind this is Edin, the Scarred Hands are heading to Minda. If Edin's underworld is a once lush forest of illegality that has been clear cut, I imagine Minda's is a desolate wasteland where even the most resilient lichen struggles to grow for long.

Crossposted on SV and SB.