Ack
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You should. I think you'd like them.
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Richard Castle, Watcher (Castle/Buffy) (Complete)
New York, October 2009
Starfox5
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New York, October 2009
"You know, they will not let us talk to him while we're armed," Richard Castle said on the way to the restaurant's entrance. Trying to get Vi to leave her weapons when they were meeting armed criminals was an exercise in futility, Castle knew that from experience. His Slayer was sometimes a bit too protective of him. On the other hand, he hadn't been hurt nearly as much as Rupert had been in Sunnydale - although to be fair, New York was not built on a Hellmouth. "So, unless you have a plan to bypass the bodyguards of Marconi, I think you should stay back and let me meet the man."
"As a matter of fact, I have a plan to make them let us pass." Beckett's smile was entirely too close to a Slayer's, for Rick's taste.
"You're not going to shoot them, are you? I know it works in the movies, but I doubt you can get away with self-defense in reality," Castle said.
Beckett didn't answer, and then they too close to the bouncers, who had noticed them approaching. Castle saw hands sliding under jackets, and winced. Talking them past those would take a miracle.
"Detective Beckett, NYPD. I have a few questions for Marconi," Beckett said, showing her badge.
A miracle, or a cop, Rick corrected himself. "This is so going into the book!" he whispered as the bouncers contacted someone through their headsets. He ignored Beckett's glare and Vi's chuckling. He could just see the scene, well he just saw it, but maybe he should make the Mob boss a vampire? No, better a demon who was not always evil. Brachen Demon, maybe.
"Mister Marconi will see you now," the man said after a moment of listening to his radio.
"'He will see us now'?" Castle shook his head while they entered. "That sounds more like a doctor's appointment than a meeting with a mafia capo." A hard-boiled detective meeting a mafia boss should sound much more… hm… mafia-like.
The restaurant's interiour looked as cliche as its name promised. Another thing Castle would have to change. Actually, he realised, the more changes, the better - it wouldn't do to insult a mob boss by mistake.
Marconi didn't look like a mob boss. He looked like an elderly accountant, with thinning grey hair, Castle thought. Definitely a Brachen stand-in.
"Good evening, detective. Please have a seat." Marconi gestured at the chair across from him
"I'd prefer to stand. This shouldn't take too long," Beckett said.
The man frowned, and for a moment, Castle thought he saw behind the polite mask, into the eyes of a violent killer. Then Marconi smiled again, and nodded. "What brings one of our city's finest to this humble restaurant?"
"Sometime ago, a rather unique thing was smuggled into the city," Beckett said. "Castle, show him the sketch."
Complaining that he had wanted to do the talking wouldn't do much for his image as a ruggedly handsome and charming author who knew his way around the seedy underbelly of new York, so Rick pulled out the sketch Willow had made and slid it over the table towards the criminal. Rick was certain that Beckett was doing this to get back at him for defending the Scoobies. Maybe.
Marconi barely glanced at it. "I'm terribly sorry, but I'm a legitimate businessman; I have no knowledge of any smuggling going on."
"A legitimate business man with a rap sheet longer than your arm," Beckett said, putting her hands on the table and leaning forward.
"Sins of a troubled youth, Detective," Marconi said with narrowed eyes. "I paid for them with a lengthy stay in prison. But I learned my lesson, and have become a model citizen."
Beckett frowned, then sneered. "You learned not to get caught. But legitimate businessmen don't have half a dozen armed men standing guard when they eat dinner."
Castle wished he could take notes.
"I am security-conscious, Miss."
"Detective."
"Detective." Marconi's tone was patronising. Insulting. He wanted to provoke Beckett, Castle realised. But why?
"This is not about smuggling, Marconi. This thing is a threat to the city. You don't want to be tied to that kind of trouble, trust me." Beckett said.
Castle nodded in support of the detective's words. Which earned him a glare from said detective, instead of a smile.
Castle couldn't tell if the implied terrorist charge impressed the man - Marconi simply smiled.
"I can assure you that I'm not party to any act of terrorism. Detective." The small pause made a mockery of the title. Beckett glared at him, but the man remained unfazed. Nerves of steel, Castle had to admit.
"Do you really want to risk that?"
"There is no risk, Detective."
Marconi was too confident, Castle thought. That kind of confidence, when faced with the charge of aiding and abetting terrorists, felt off. Why was the man so certain that he would not be sent to Guantanamo, or wherever the USA sent domestic terrorists?
Because he knew what had been smuggled, Castle thought. Marconi might have been duped, of course, but then he would not react like this. No, he knew that the thing was magical, Castle would bet his… well, something on it. And that meant a change of plans. He cleared his throat. "Well, it's obvious the good man doesn't know anything. We're wasting our time here."
To her credit, Beckett understood at once. She probably had come to the same conclusion as he. She nodded at the man, then turned around. "Let's go."
Castle kept looking around as they made their way towards the door. Half the room was watching them, and the other half was pretending that they couldn't see them. Another bad sign. Two more and they could start a band.
"He just told the men to stop us," Vi whispered.
"So much for polite, honourable meetings with the mob," Castle said under his breath. "Hollywood lied to me!"
"The three outside just just were ordered to come inside and cut us off." Vi's Slayer senses were coming through again.
"Time for Plan B," Castle said. "Break left once the door opens."
"Break left?" Beckett asked in a strained whisper.
Before Castle could answer, the door started to open, and all hell broke loose.
Vi grabbed the closest table and threw it at the door, smashing it closed and breaking the hand of the first man who had stepped inside with his gun out. Castle ducked and started to run towards the kitchen entrance to their left. There would be a back door for deliveries, an obvious escape route. Marconi's men would expect that.
Castle pushed past a shrieking couple and drew his own gun. Then he dropped to the ground. Just in time - shots were fired, and people started to scream in panic, before their screams were drowned out by a Slayer emptying her Glock 20 in three seconds while vaulting over tables and guests. Probably.
Castle wasn't looking at her. He was aiming. With most of his goons down, Marconi would start to run… right now. Rick pulled the trigger twice, and the man went down, clutching his leg. Rick rolled around the next table, then scrambled over a screaming woman who was obviously regretting getting breast implants right now, and reached a corner.
A quick glance showed him that Vi and Beckett were shooting it out with the two remaining bouncers outside. Which didn't take long. Marconi was still trying to escape despite his bleeding leg. A kick from Castle put an end to that. He shook his head at the mafioso. "That was a mistake. Working with demons, that is. As well as attacking the resident Slayer of New York." The man paled, which clinched it - he knew about the supernatural. And he was working with demons.
Which would make cleaning up this mess simpler. Not easier, though. Executing humans should never be easy anyway. After Willow had made him talk, of course.
"Clear," Vi said, replacing the magazine in her pistol with a fresh one as she stepped up to him. And when a Slayer said 'clear', it was. Usually. Slayer senses were just that good.
The last of the guests were just fleeing through the kitchen now, Castle saw.
Beckett was frowning, despite their victory. Castle wondered why - had Vi shown off too much?
"That'll be hard to explain to my precinct," the detective said.
"Oh. Not at all. Internal conflict. Some of Marconi's own men tried to kill him. I had a craving for pasta, and we were here when the thing happened, and intervened to protect the innocents. Who, judging by how quickly they all fled, might not have been that innocent, actually." Castle grinned.
"No one will believe that we just happened to pick Marconi's restaurant for dinner." Beckett glared at him.
"Of course not! I, being eccentric and rich, and fascinated by crime, decided to visit to do some research for my next book!" Rick's grin widened. "My reputation does come in handy, right?"
The detective was less impressed by his plan than he had expected. Less grateful too.
*****
"You know, they will not let us talk to him while we're armed," Richard Castle said on the way to the restaurant's entrance. Trying to get Vi to leave her weapons when they were meeting armed criminals was an exercise in futility, Castle knew that from experience. His Slayer was sometimes a bit too protective of him. On the other hand, he hadn't been hurt nearly as much as Rupert had been in Sunnydale - although to be fair, New York was not built on a Hellmouth. "So, unless you have a plan to bypass the bodyguards of Marconi, I think you should stay back and let me meet the man."
"As a matter of fact, I have a plan to make them let us pass." Beckett's smile was entirely too close to a Slayer's, for Rick's taste.
"You're not going to shoot them, are you? I know it works in the movies, but I doubt you can get away with self-defense in reality," Castle said.
Beckett didn't answer, and then they too close to the bouncers, who had noticed them approaching. Castle saw hands sliding under jackets, and winced. Talking them past those would take a miracle.
"Detective Beckett, NYPD. I have a few questions for Marconi," Beckett said, showing her badge.
A miracle, or a cop, Rick corrected himself. "This is so going into the book!" he whispered as the bouncers contacted someone through their headsets. He ignored Beckett's glare and Vi's chuckling. He could just see the scene, well he just saw it, but maybe he should make the Mob boss a vampire? No, better a demon who was not always evil. Brachen Demon, maybe.
"Mister Marconi will see you now," the man said after a moment of listening to his radio.
"'He will see us now'?" Castle shook his head while they entered. "That sounds more like a doctor's appointment than a meeting with a mafia capo." A hard-boiled detective meeting a mafia boss should sound much more… hm… mafia-like.
The restaurant's interiour looked as cliche as its name promised. Another thing Castle would have to change. Actually, he realised, the more changes, the better - it wouldn't do to insult a mob boss by mistake.
Marconi didn't look like a mob boss. He looked like an elderly accountant, with thinning grey hair, Castle thought. Definitely a Brachen stand-in.
"Good evening, detective. Please have a seat." Marconi gestured at the chair across from him
"I'd prefer to stand. This shouldn't take too long," Beckett said.
The man frowned, and for a moment, Castle thought he saw behind the polite mask, into the eyes of a violent killer. Then Marconi smiled again, and nodded. "What brings one of our city's finest to this humble restaurant?"
"Sometime ago, a rather unique thing was smuggled into the city," Beckett said. "Castle, show him the sketch."
Complaining that he had wanted to do the talking wouldn't do much for his image as a ruggedly handsome and charming author who knew his way around the seedy underbelly of new York, so Rick pulled out the sketch Willow had made and slid it over the table towards the criminal. Rick was certain that Beckett was doing this to get back at him for defending the Scoobies. Maybe.
Marconi barely glanced at it. "I'm terribly sorry, but I'm a legitimate businessman; I have no knowledge of any smuggling going on."
"A legitimate business man with a rap sheet longer than your arm," Beckett said, putting her hands on the table and leaning forward.
"Sins of a troubled youth, Detective," Marconi said with narrowed eyes. "I paid for them with a lengthy stay in prison. But I learned my lesson, and have become a model citizen."
Beckett frowned, then sneered. "You learned not to get caught. But legitimate businessmen don't have half a dozen armed men standing guard when they eat dinner."
Castle wished he could take notes.
"I am security-conscious, Miss."
"Detective."
"Detective." Marconi's tone was patronising. Insulting. He wanted to provoke Beckett, Castle realised. But why?
"This is not about smuggling, Marconi. This thing is a threat to the city. You don't want to be tied to that kind of trouble, trust me." Beckett said.
Castle nodded in support of the detective's words. Which earned him a glare from said detective, instead of a smile.
Castle couldn't tell if the implied terrorist charge impressed the man - Marconi simply smiled.
"I can assure you that I'm not party to any act of terrorism. Detective." The small pause made a mockery of the title. Beckett glared at him, but the man remained unfazed. Nerves of steel, Castle had to admit.
"Do you really want to risk that?"
"There is no risk, Detective."
Marconi was too confident, Castle thought. That kind of confidence, when faced with the charge of aiding and abetting terrorists, felt off. Why was the man so certain that he would not be sent to Guantanamo, or wherever the USA sent domestic terrorists?
Because he knew what had been smuggled, Castle thought. Marconi might have been duped, of course, but then he would not react like this. No, he knew that the thing was magical, Castle would bet his… well, something on it. And that meant a change of plans. He cleared his throat. "Well, it's obvious the good man doesn't know anything. We're wasting our time here."
To her credit, Beckett understood at once. She probably had come to the same conclusion as he. She nodded at the man, then turned around. "Let's go."
Castle kept looking around as they made their way towards the door. Half the room was watching them, and the other half was pretending that they couldn't see them. Another bad sign. Two more and they could start a band.
"He just told the men to stop us," Vi whispered.
"So much for polite, honourable meetings with the mob," Castle said under his breath. "Hollywood lied to me!"
"The three outside just just were ordered to come inside and cut us off." Vi's Slayer senses were coming through again.
"Time for Plan B," Castle said. "Break left once the door opens."
"Break left?" Beckett asked in a strained whisper.
Before Castle could answer, the door started to open, and all hell broke loose.
Vi grabbed the closest table and threw it at the door, smashing it closed and breaking the hand of the first man who had stepped inside with his gun out. Castle ducked and started to run towards the kitchen entrance to their left. There would be a back door for deliveries, an obvious escape route. Marconi's men would expect that.
Castle pushed past a shrieking couple and drew his own gun. Then he dropped to the ground. Just in time - shots were fired, and people started to scream in panic, before their screams were drowned out by a Slayer emptying her Glock 20 in three seconds while vaulting over tables and guests. Probably.
Castle wasn't looking at her. He was aiming. With most of his goons down, Marconi would start to run… right now. Rick pulled the trigger twice, and the man went down, clutching his leg. Rick rolled around the next table, then scrambled over a screaming woman who was obviously regretting getting breast implants right now, and reached a corner.
A quick glance showed him that Vi and Beckett were shooting it out with the two remaining bouncers outside. Which didn't take long. Marconi was still trying to escape despite his bleeding leg. A kick from Castle put an end to that. He shook his head at the mafioso. "That was a mistake. Working with demons, that is. As well as attacking the resident Slayer of New York." The man paled, which clinched it - he knew about the supernatural. And he was working with demons.
Which would make cleaning up this mess simpler. Not easier, though. Executing humans should never be easy anyway. After Willow had made him talk, of course.
"Clear," Vi said, replacing the magazine in her pistol with a fresh one as she stepped up to him. And when a Slayer said 'clear', it was. Usually. Slayer senses were just that good.
The last of the guests were just fleeing through the kitchen now, Castle saw.
Beckett was frowning, despite their victory. Castle wondered why - had Vi shown off too much?
"That'll be hard to explain to my precinct," the detective said.
"Oh. Not at all. Internal conflict. Some of Marconi's own men tried to kill him. I had a craving for pasta, and we were here when the thing happened, and intervened to protect the innocents. Who, judging by how quickly they all fled, might not have been that innocent, actually." Castle grinned.
"No one will believe that we just happened to pick Marconi's restaurant for dinner." Beckett glared at him.
"Of course not! I, being eccentric and rich, and fascinated by crime, decided to visit to do some research for my next book!" Rick's grin widened. "My reputation does come in handy, right?"
The detective was less impressed by his plan than he had expected. Less grateful too.
*****
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Alexcorvin
Goodbye
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HOly Crap! Your a Butcher fan, Ack? Seriously, I'd love to see you do some short ficlets for the series! I mean, seriously, your Worm stuff is Grade A, so I could only hope your Dresden Files stuff would be of a similar caliber. Seriously, think about it, man. I think you could write some great stuff.
Ack
(Verified Ratbag) (Unverified Great Old One)
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Unsure.
I was reading Dresden long before I was writing fanfic.
Though I think Taylor and Dresden would have a lot in common.
Starfox5
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I usually tend to prefer books with a female lead. Also, how does the series handle Christian religion? I tend to back off from works where the Christia God is real.
BRBonobo
Not too sore, are you?
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There are Christian elements (Angels, Holy Knights etc.) and they seem to be some of the more powerful things in universe, but there are other 'capital-P' Powers out there. There are old gods and embodiments of death and life, so it is unclear if 'The White God' as faeries refer to him is the creator and true god. Certainly archangels are (probably) the most powerful beings that Harry has had to deal with in the story so far, but the great existential threat involves mostly Cthuloid beings from Outside (as in outside of the universe)
and they are a threat to a rogue group of fallen angels just as they are a threat to everyone else.
Oh, and faith is a thing, but doesn't have to be about Christian faith. The main character is not a Christian, but he uses his faith in magic to drive off vampires.
Also,
the latest Knight of the Cross, to take up the mantle is Jewish
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Ack
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Let's just say that the female characters are in no way shrinking violets. Karrin Murphy (I think that's how her name is spelled) is awesomely badass. Dresden spends a lot of time in awe of her, which makes it interesting when you see him from her point of view. See, most of the time, he's a bit of a goofball, but when the chips are down, he goes to town. And she's seen him like that, which explains why she (mostly) tolerates the goofballery.
Also, how can you not like a story where the main character drives a VW called the Blue Beetle?
Visual Pun
Reawakening Revenant (i.e. 'Venant'?)
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"Why are all the bugs on fire?"
Harry Dresden and Taylor Hebert each pointed indignantly at the other.
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Especially one that isn't particularly blue anymore.
Yeah, neither one of them is in the habit of following the law if it keeps them from doing what needs to be done.
Ack
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And when shit gets real, they get it DONE.
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Ain't that the truth, the shit Dresden's done is all kinds of WTF. My favorite moment is still the zombie though.
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Alexcorvin
Goodbye
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Hey, have you seen Magical Girl Lyrical Taylor over on SB? It has Merlin as Not!Harry. Seriously. Its fucking hilarious.
Ack
(Verified Ratbag) (Unverified Great Old One)
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Was that the T-rex?
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yes and spoiler that please. I was trying to be circumspect.
New York, October 2009
Starfox5
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New York, October 2009
Detective Kate Beckett shook her head as she stared at the wrecked restaurant. "It won't work. There are too many witnesses." The guests had fled, and Vi hadn't killed any of the men shooting at her. Unlike Beckett. Her bullets would be found in two dead men. They had been trying to kill her, but still… She shook her head. "We'll play it straight. We came to talk to Marconi, on your initiative. Since you wanted to find out about some obscure thing for your research. And," she added with a glance, "because you wanted to meet a capo. He had us attacked out of the blue."
"That's not straight. It's more… slightly bent? Sort of," Castle said.
He had that grin on his face again that made her want to both hit and… she wasn't going there. Her colleagues already thought that she was sleeping with him. After this, they'd be even more convinced - they'd think she was following him around like some love-struck girl.
"But we'll roll with it." He smirked at her. "It's a cunning plan, Detective."
She rolled her eyes. He was joking, but she could lose her job over this. And even if all worked out, something always stuck to you in those incidents. Especially with Castle involved. People talked and speculated. She'd have a reputation.
"It's clear." Vi was back from a quick sweep of the street. "The rest of the thugs have fled."
"Alright. Call it in. We'll get the truth out of Marconi."
"What?" She stared at Castle and his Slayer.
"We don't have much time, and interrogating him when he's under guard in a hospital will be too difficult."
She hated feeling like she lost control of the situation. She was a cop, and this was a crime scene. She should be calling the shots here.
But it wasn't her case, but the Council's. Castle's case, as weird as that still sounded. She pulled out her phone and called it in while Castle walked over to the whimpering mob boss.
Beckett watched as two paramedics pushed the stretcher with the unconscious Marconi into an ambulance. Castle hadn't tortured the man, which she had feared at first. It hadn't been quite the 'roughing up' of a suspect some older cops called it either. But he hadn't exactly been gentle with the wounded crook. And after the man had told them what he knew… "Was it really necessary to knock him unconscious at the end?" she asked in a low voice.
"Yes!" Vi said, too far away for a normal human to have overheard her, flashing her a predatory grin. The Slayer was very protective of her Watcher.
"It simplifies things," Castle answered, next to her.
She looked at him. His expression was serious. Dead serious, she realised, with a sinking feeling in her gut. "You're going to kill him?"
"Not personally. But those who willingly work with demons against humanity share the fate of their fell allies."
He was quoting his books. Loremaster William had said that in 'Shadows over Paris". She clenched her teeth together. When she had joined the force, she had sworn that she'd not become one of those cops who bent the law while claiming to pursue justice. Or looked away when crimes were committed against criminals. But what was the alternative? Letting the mob join forces with demons?
She told herself that killing Marconi wasn't a crime according to those treaties Castle had mentioned. She wasn't a crooked cop. Not really. She was just a cop moonlighting as a demon hunter.
"Hey, Beckett!"
She turned her head and saw Esposito walk towards her, carefully stepping around the corpse at the end of the bar. Ryan was following him. "This looks like a gang war gone bad," the former soldier said, shaking his head. "What happened?"
She knew what he really meant: What had she been doing in the middle of all of that? "Castle wanted to meet Marconi, to do some research for his next book. I didn't want to let him and Vi go alone…" She sighed. "Apparently, the capo didn't take well to Castle's questions and set his goons on us. They didn't expect us to defend ourselves." They hadn't expected Vi, to be honest. But Beckett wasn't about to mention that.
"I thought that old spinster at the New York Times was my worst critic," Castle cut in, "but apparently, I was wrong." He sighed, almost theatrically. "Some people take Fantasy novels far too seriously." He rubbed his chin. "Or they are just jealous."
"I'm sorry to tell you this, Castle," Kate said, "but it wasn't your books, it was your personality he took offense to."
He gasped at her. "No!"
"Yes." She grinned at him. "Weren't you aware that a number of people would love to shoot you once they know you? Marconi simply acted on this urge. I'm almost jealous, to be honest."
Esposito and Ryan laughed with her while Castle pouted. He had told her to blame him, hadn't he? She still owed him for claiming they were a couple as their cover.
"That's a new record," Ryan said. "Don't your girlfriends usually take a few weeks until they want to shoot you? Not literally, I mean."
Beckett saw a glint appear in Castle's eyes, but before she could warn him to not even think about it - no matter what it was - he had wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her into his side. "Oh, but she wanted to shoot me from the start, until she finally fell for my roguishly handsome charm!"
Beckett forced herself to smile while her own arm slid around his hip, until she could pinch his side without the two other detectives spotting it.
"That sounds like a rather special relationship," Ryan said. Esposito nodded.
"You have no idea how special!" Castle said, beaming at them while she felt him squirm a little under her grip.
Judging from the glance the two men exchanged, neither Castle nor herself were that good at acting, Beckett thought. She wasn't certain if she should be happy or disappointed. Castle was arrogant, infuriating, and acted less mature than his teenage daughter, but he was also, though she loathed to admit it, attractive and charming - and very brave. She blinked suddenly. Dear god, she was thinking like a character in a cheap romance novel!
"You were getting right cozy there with each other. Did something happen that I, as your best friend, bodyguard, and Slayer, should know?" Vi asked while she took a turn at a speed that only a Slayer or professional race driver could safely handle.
It said a lot about how crazy Beckett's life had become since she had met Castle that she didn't really notice such things any more.
"Oh, my impressionable young Slayer," Castle said, "I wish I could tell you all about our passionate love affair."
"But since it's just his imagination, he can't," Beckett interrupted him.
"But I can, actually! I'm a bestselling author! Turning my imagination into words is how I became rich."
"Don't tell me that the tough and sassy detective in your next book will have an affair with an author," Beckett said. She still didn't know if she should be proud that her favourite author wanted to use her as a model for his next main character - she was even less certain after meeting some of the people who had served as such models in the past - but to read a sex scene involving her expy, and what would be Castle's self-insert…
"Of course not!" Castle said. She was relieved - and a tiny, very tiny, bit disappointed - until he continued: "He'll be a journalist instead, I think."
"And what about the beautiful and sexy Vampire Hunter who will end up saving them both?" Vi asked.
"I don't think that will go further than some unconscious flirting between the two women," Castle said. "At least in the first book."
"What?" Beckett and Vi said in unison.
"I'm kidding, I'm kidding!" the author quickly said, holding his hands up.
"You don't sound like you're kidding," Vi said. "And you won't look me into the eyes!"
"I don't want to look into your eyes because you're driving! And at a rather high speed, if I might add!" Castle's English accent was peeking through - he must be stressed, Beckett thought.
"Don't try to change the subject!" Vi said, taking another turn without more than glancing at the road once. "This is important!"
"Priorities, Vi! We have a city to save, remember?" Castle said.
The redhead huffed, then glanced over her shoulder at Kate. "Aren't you going to tell him that a character based on you would never fall for a woman?"
Kate couldn't resist. "Why would I do that? Didn't you experiment in college?" she asked, acting as innocently as possible.
When Vi gasped and Castle whipped his head around to stare at her so quickly, she could almost hear his vertebrae crack in protest, the detective laughed.
When Castle loudly declared: "That's so going into the book!", she stopped laughing. She should have expected that. She knew Castle well by now. But maybe not yet well enough.
*****
Detective Kate Beckett shook her head as she stared at the wrecked restaurant. "It won't work. There are too many witnesses." The guests had fled, and Vi hadn't killed any of the men shooting at her. Unlike Beckett. Her bullets would be found in two dead men. They had been trying to kill her, but still… She shook her head. "We'll play it straight. We came to talk to Marconi, on your initiative. Since you wanted to find out about some obscure thing for your research. And," she added with a glance, "because you wanted to meet a capo. He had us attacked out of the blue."
"That's not straight. It's more… slightly bent? Sort of," Castle said.
He had that grin on his face again that made her want to both hit and… she wasn't going there. Her colleagues already thought that she was sleeping with him. After this, they'd be even more convinced - they'd think she was following him around like some love-struck girl.
"But we'll roll with it." He smirked at her. "It's a cunning plan, Detective."
She rolled her eyes. He was joking, but she could lose her job over this. And even if all worked out, something always stuck to you in those incidents. Especially with Castle involved. People talked and speculated. She'd have a reputation.
"It's clear." Vi was back from a quick sweep of the street. "The rest of the thugs have fled."
"Alright. Call it in. We'll get the truth out of Marconi."
"What?" She stared at Castle and his Slayer.
"We don't have much time, and interrogating him when he's under guard in a hospital will be too difficult."
She hated feeling like she lost control of the situation. She was a cop, and this was a crime scene. She should be calling the shots here.
But it wasn't her case, but the Council's. Castle's case, as weird as that still sounded. She pulled out her phone and called it in while Castle walked over to the whimpering mob boss.
*****
Beckett watched as two paramedics pushed the stretcher with the unconscious Marconi into an ambulance. Castle hadn't tortured the man, which she had feared at first. It hadn't been quite the 'roughing up' of a suspect some older cops called it either. But he hadn't exactly been gentle with the wounded crook. And after the man had told them what he knew… "Was it really necessary to knock him unconscious at the end?" she asked in a low voice.
"Yes!" Vi said, too far away for a normal human to have overheard her, flashing her a predatory grin. The Slayer was very protective of her Watcher.
"It simplifies things," Castle answered, next to her.
She looked at him. His expression was serious. Dead serious, she realised, with a sinking feeling in her gut. "You're going to kill him?"
"Not personally. But those who willingly work with demons against humanity share the fate of their fell allies."
He was quoting his books. Loremaster William had said that in 'Shadows over Paris". She clenched her teeth together. When she had joined the force, she had sworn that she'd not become one of those cops who bent the law while claiming to pursue justice. Or looked away when crimes were committed against criminals. But what was the alternative? Letting the mob join forces with demons?
She told herself that killing Marconi wasn't a crime according to those treaties Castle had mentioned. She wasn't a crooked cop. Not really. She was just a cop moonlighting as a demon hunter.
"Hey, Beckett!"
She turned her head and saw Esposito walk towards her, carefully stepping around the corpse at the end of the bar. Ryan was following him. "This looks like a gang war gone bad," the former soldier said, shaking his head. "What happened?"
She knew what he really meant: What had she been doing in the middle of all of that? "Castle wanted to meet Marconi, to do some research for his next book. I didn't want to let him and Vi go alone…" She sighed. "Apparently, the capo didn't take well to Castle's questions and set his goons on us. They didn't expect us to defend ourselves." They hadn't expected Vi, to be honest. But Beckett wasn't about to mention that.
"I thought that old spinster at the New York Times was my worst critic," Castle cut in, "but apparently, I was wrong." He sighed, almost theatrically. "Some people take Fantasy novels far too seriously." He rubbed his chin. "Or they are just jealous."
"I'm sorry to tell you this, Castle," Kate said, "but it wasn't your books, it was your personality he took offense to."
He gasped at her. "No!"
"Yes." She grinned at him. "Weren't you aware that a number of people would love to shoot you once they know you? Marconi simply acted on this urge. I'm almost jealous, to be honest."
Esposito and Ryan laughed with her while Castle pouted. He had told her to blame him, hadn't he? She still owed him for claiming they were a couple as their cover.
"That's a new record," Ryan said. "Don't your girlfriends usually take a few weeks until they want to shoot you? Not literally, I mean."
Beckett saw a glint appear in Castle's eyes, but before she could warn him to not even think about it - no matter what it was - he had wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her into his side. "Oh, but she wanted to shoot me from the start, until she finally fell for my roguishly handsome charm!"
Beckett forced herself to smile while her own arm slid around his hip, until she could pinch his side without the two other detectives spotting it.
"That sounds like a rather special relationship," Ryan said. Esposito nodded.
"You have no idea how special!" Castle said, beaming at them while she felt him squirm a little under her grip.
Judging from the glance the two men exchanged, neither Castle nor herself were that good at acting, Beckett thought. She wasn't certain if she should be happy or disappointed. Castle was arrogant, infuriating, and acted less mature than his teenage daughter, but he was also, though she loathed to admit it, attractive and charming - and very brave. She blinked suddenly. Dear god, she was thinking like a character in a cheap romance novel!
*****
"You were getting right cozy there with each other. Did something happen that I, as your best friend, bodyguard, and Slayer, should know?" Vi asked while she took a turn at a speed that only a Slayer or professional race driver could safely handle.
It said a lot about how crazy Beckett's life had become since she had met Castle that she didn't really notice such things any more.
"Oh, my impressionable young Slayer," Castle said, "I wish I could tell you all about our passionate love affair."
"But since it's just his imagination, he can't," Beckett interrupted him.
"But I can, actually! I'm a bestselling author! Turning my imagination into words is how I became rich."
"Don't tell me that the tough and sassy detective in your next book will have an affair with an author," Beckett said. She still didn't know if she should be proud that her favourite author wanted to use her as a model for his next main character - she was even less certain after meeting some of the people who had served as such models in the past - but to read a sex scene involving her expy, and what would be Castle's self-insert…
"Of course not!" Castle said. She was relieved - and a tiny, very tiny, bit disappointed - until he continued: "He'll be a journalist instead, I think."
"And what about the beautiful and sexy Vampire Hunter who will end up saving them both?" Vi asked.
"I don't think that will go further than some unconscious flirting between the two women," Castle said. "At least in the first book."
"What?" Beckett and Vi said in unison.
"I'm kidding, I'm kidding!" the author quickly said, holding his hands up.
"You don't sound like you're kidding," Vi said. "And you won't look me into the eyes!"
"I don't want to look into your eyes because you're driving! And at a rather high speed, if I might add!" Castle's English accent was peeking through - he must be stressed, Beckett thought.
"Don't try to change the subject!" Vi said, taking another turn without more than glancing at the road once. "This is important!"
"Priorities, Vi! We have a city to save, remember?" Castle said.
The redhead huffed, then glanced over her shoulder at Kate. "Aren't you going to tell him that a character based on you would never fall for a woman?"
Kate couldn't resist. "Why would I do that? Didn't you experiment in college?" she asked, acting as innocently as possible.
When Vi gasped and Castle whipped his head around to stare at her so quickly, she could almost hear his vertebrae crack in protest, the detective laughed.
When Castle loudly declared: "That's so going into the book!", she stopped laughing. She should have expected that. She knew Castle well by now. But maybe not yet well enough.
*****
Last edited:
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This is really making me want to write a Richard Castle, Wizard of the White Council fic.
Alexcorvin
Goodbye
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It was Sue the T Rex, the most complete T Rex skeleton found (at least, that's what the book says, so Jim probably researched it first.)
It was, without a doubt, probably one of the most bad ass moments in the DF series, apart from a few others, but, seriously... riding into battle on the back of a zombie T Rex?
It was, without a doubt, probably one of the most bad ass moments in the DF series, apart from a few others, but, seriously... riding into battle on the back of a zombie T Rex?
Fucking.
Bad.
Ass.
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macdjord
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Spoilers, dude.
Alexcorvin
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Sorry. Edited.
New York, October 2009
Starfox5
Experienced.
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New York, October 2009
"So… the evil cultists had a deal with the evil godfather. That sounds like a fairy tale." Richard Castle saw Buffy purse her lips while she pondered this. "Fairies are of the bad. Well, the fairy tale-y ones, not the other kind. Which is a derogatory word we shouldn't use anyway."
"That's not exactly the point, Buffy." Xander shook his head. "In any case, we managed to get the immigration records. But tracking the Russians - the Russian-Americans - down will take some time."
"It would be faster if they had more electronic records," Willow cut in, looking up from her laptop. Where, Castle noted, his daughter, who was nearing her bedtime, was paying rapt attention to what was certainly a rather illegal hacking attempt. "Bunch of luddites!" the witch added.
"Well, we can start to track them the old-fashioned way," Xander said. "Like private eyes! I need a fedora. And a trench coat."
"Daddy's already a consultant for the police. He can be Sherlock Holmes," Alexis said.
"He'll need a deerstalker then. And more tweed," Xander said.
"Leaving aside the fact that the original novels never mentioned a deerstalker, I'm not going to wear tweed." Castle laid the law down. He had a reputation to maintain.
"Do the malls in New York even sell deerstalkers? Or did the city ban them for to avoid traumatising the fashion-conscious population?" Buffy asked.
"I'm not going to wear a deerstalker," Castle said.
"Beckett should be wearing the deerstalker. Not only would it be a great disguise, but she's already a detective," Vi said.
Castle glanced at Beckett, who hadn't said much for the entire meeting so far.
The detective shook her head. "Does anyone care about the fact that the local mob is involved with this demon cult? That we had a shootout with the mafia? That you are apparently going to kill the capo while he is in police custody?"
"Technically, he's in a hospital under guard. Though that counts as police custody, I guess," Willow said.
Beckett glared at the women - apparently, Castle thought, she had not been impressed by his tales about the Red Witch. "How can you talk about clothes with this hanging over our heads?"
"Fashion's important!" Buffy said, with a wide smile.
"Murder's a bit more important than fashion." Beckett clenched her teeth and she had that slight twitch near her eyebrow that Castle knew meant she was really angry.
"It's not murder. It's an execution," Xander said.
"Without a trial."
The young man shrugged. "We know he's guilty. If we let him go he'll likely contact more demons. Those who work with them usually do. And I think New York would fare better without a demonic mafia." He scoffed. "Imagine trying to arrest mafia goons with magical enhancements. Or the ability to curse their enemies. Not to mention that he did help demons trying to free a big bad, which is enough to merit the death penalty by itself."
"It's not as if we can lock him up," Castle added. "We're hard-pressed to protect the world without having to guard a prison."
"I could turn him into a rat, and we could keep him in a cage, but that way lies badness." Willow grimaced.
Beckett stared at the witch. "You can turn people into rats?"
"Yes." The redhead nodded. "It's dangerous, though. An acquaintance of us turned herself into a rat to escape a witch burning. She was stuck as a rat for years, though, since rats can't cast spells."
"That witch also turned me into a rat when we were both under the influence of a love spell." Buffy scowled. "It wasn't fun, and when I was turned back I had lost all my clothes!"
"According to what I heard you had already stripped nude in an attempt to seduce Xander before you were turned into a rat," Dawn said, grinning.
"Where did you hear that? Spike? Xander?" Buffy was glaring around.
"I wasn't involved, but I know the story," the vampire said, grinning.
"We all swore never to talk about that day again!" Xander said. "Have you forgotten that Anya starts to talk about her past whenever it is brought up?"
"What does that mean?" Beckett asked. The detective looked slightly shocked - apparently, she hadn't grown as used to the supernatural as Castle had thought. Or maybe he had underestimated the effect close proximity to the Scoobies had on normal people.
"It's a long story," Buffy said.
"Anya worked as the vengeance demon for scorned women and punished men in very cruel and creative ways," Dawn said.
"Apparently not that long," Buffy said. "But we have a mission to accomplish here."
"And we can't just declare it over before it's over," Xander added. "Well, we could, but it would be a bad idea. And we don't have an aircraft carrier."
Castle saw Beckett blink, and decided to move things back on track before the detective suffered an overdose of Scooby trivia. Their war stories made his own sound boring. "So… we need to track Russian immigrants and the dockworkers who helped the demons smuggle the seal in. Who is on which task?"
"Dawn and the detective both speak Russian. That should help gaining their trust," Xander said.
"They fled Russia. I don't think they're easily trusting strangers speaking Russian." Dawn shook her head. "Especially if you or Miss Overprotective keep glaring at them."
"I don't glare!" Buffy said.
"Sure you do! You scared away half my dates!" Dawn retorted.
"Half your dates?" Buffy gaped. "That's not… you dated people I didn't met first?"
"Of course! All who met you were too scared to date me!"
"They wouldn't have been scared if they could be trusted!"
"As if you are a good judge of dating material, given your love life!" Dawn huffed.
"Oy!" Spike said.
"Present company excluded," Dawn added with a smile.
"Present company included!" Xander said.
"Oy!"
Castle was about to attempt to get the planning meeting back on track when the doorbell rang. At once, the spat between the Summers sisters was over.
"Do you expect anyone?" Buffy asked, halfway to the door already, Mr. Pointy in her hand.
"No, I don't," Castle said, grabbing his jacket to cover up his gun holster, if needed.
Vi was at the door, peering through the peephole, while the rest took up positions.
"It's the Special Agent," she said. "And he looks mad."
Castle muttered a curse under his breath. He should have expected this.
"Agent Sorelosoron!" Castle greeted the man with the fakest smile he could manage this side of being polite.
The man glared at him. "Is Kate here?"
Rick was tempted to ask if the man had a warrant, but that would be too much for the obviously tense agent. Probably. Weren't Feds supposed to be more calm? Then again, if he had heard about Beckett being in a shootout, he'd not be calm either.
"Yes," Beckett said behind him.
The agent took in a sharp breath, then tried to push past Castle. For a moment, Rick wanted to stop him. Grab him and tell him to get lost. He was invading a private residence, wasn't he? But Kate would hate that. And he was a better man than that, too. So he stepped to the side, though he couldn't help adding: "I guess manners are not taught at the FBI academy."
"Kate! I just heard that you were in a shootout with Antoinio Marconi's men!"
"You just heard that?" Castle whistled. "Wow, I knew the cooperation between the Feds and the local cops was bad, but that bad?" Both cops glared at him, so he held his hand up. "I'm just making an observation."
"An observation we can do without right now," Agent Can't-take-it-son said. "What happened? Why were in his restaurant?"
"That was his restaurant? That explains the biggest collection of Italian cliches I've ever seen!" Castle shook his head.
"Castle!" Beckett hissed at him.
"Sorry. I'll be quiet now and leave our dear Special Agent to have a special moment." He mimed zipping his lips shut.
"Five bucks say he won't stay silent longer than five minutes!" Vi loudly commented, which caused the Scoobies to chuckle. Even Alexis giggled!
"And who are those people?" The agent gestured at the assembled Scoobies. They had stashed and holstered their weapons, but they were still spread out just right to cover the door, something the agent might just have realised, Castle thought.
"Friends of mine from England," Castle said.
"I knew it!" Vi crowed. "Pay up!"
"I didn't bet, duh," Xander said. "That was the mother of all sucker's bets!"
"He's weaseling out of another bet?" Dawn shook her head. "I thought he had changed his slippery ways."
"I never accepted that bet either!" Xander said.
"And he even won that bet!" Dawn pouted. "He's really bad at this."
"You wanted to lose that bet, duh!" Xander was glaring at the girl now.
"So?" Dawn wrinkled her nose. "You're welching on bets, that's a fact!"
"I am not welching on bets!"
"Dawn! Xander! Stop that!" Buffy snapped, glaring at both. Then she turned to the agent, and smiled so sweetly, Castle could almost fele his teeth starting to rot. "Please excuse my sister and my friend. They'll behave now, so you can continue with… whatever you were doing, I guess."
"What?" The agent was staring at the blonde Slayer.
Castle snorted, which earned him another glare from Beckett - another reason to keep Agent Jealouson away from her; she was usually far more receptive to funny quips, or so Castle thought.
"They are guests of Castle, Will," Beckett said.
The agent was visibly struggling to get his mind back in gear. Rick wasn't surprised - rigid minds usually didn't do well when faced with such situations. Beckett had to have realised that as well, since she was showing far more patience with the agent than she usually had with Castle.
"But… whatever. Kate! What happened?"
"Castle wanted to meet a mob boss, to do some research for his next book. So we went and visited Marconi's favourite restaurant," Beckett explained. "The man did meet with him, but somehow must have taken offense at his questions, since he ordered his men to attack us."
"Well, as far as attacks go, that was barely above an attempt. For hardened criminals, they really were not much to talk about," Vi said. "We shot, what, eight of them?"
"Maybe they are not much to talk about because they misunderstood the Omerta?" Castle said. When no one laughed and Alexis rolled her eyes at him, he pouted. That hadn't been a bad joke. Not one of his best, but still - it wasn't as if their own quips were always award-worthy!
Suddenly, Beckett's very ex-boyfriend lunged for him. "Castle! What did you do?"
Rick could have taken him, of course - he had fought vampires and other demons who were far stronger than a puny Special Agent in a cheap suit - but Vi had the man down on the ground and in a very painful armlock - Castle knew that from experience - before anyone else could do anything.
While Beckett was gaping - hopefully shocked at the potential for unprovoked violence her ex-boyfriend had been displaying - Castle was thinking of how to work that in his next book, and Buffy was criticising his Slayer's form, Spike shook his head and said: "Oy… I want it on record that I had nothing to do with this assault on a cop!"
Trust the damn vampire to totally misrepresent the situation!
*****
"So… the evil cultists had a deal with the evil godfather. That sounds like a fairy tale." Richard Castle saw Buffy purse her lips while she pondered this. "Fairies are of the bad. Well, the fairy tale-y ones, not the other kind. Which is a derogatory word we shouldn't use anyway."
"That's not exactly the point, Buffy." Xander shook his head. "In any case, we managed to get the immigration records. But tracking the Russians - the Russian-Americans - down will take some time."
"It would be faster if they had more electronic records," Willow cut in, looking up from her laptop. Where, Castle noted, his daughter, who was nearing her bedtime, was paying rapt attention to what was certainly a rather illegal hacking attempt. "Bunch of luddites!" the witch added.
"Well, we can start to track them the old-fashioned way," Xander said. "Like private eyes! I need a fedora. And a trench coat."
"Daddy's already a consultant for the police. He can be Sherlock Holmes," Alexis said.
"He'll need a deerstalker then. And more tweed," Xander said.
"Leaving aside the fact that the original novels never mentioned a deerstalker, I'm not going to wear tweed." Castle laid the law down. He had a reputation to maintain.
"Do the malls in New York even sell deerstalkers? Or did the city ban them for to avoid traumatising the fashion-conscious population?" Buffy asked.
"I'm not going to wear a deerstalker," Castle said.
"Beckett should be wearing the deerstalker. Not only would it be a great disguise, but she's already a detective," Vi said.
Castle glanced at Beckett, who hadn't said much for the entire meeting so far.
The detective shook her head. "Does anyone care about the fact that the local mob is involved with this demon cult? That we had a shootout with the mafia? That you are apparently going to kill the capo while he is in police custody?"
"Technically, he's in a hospital under guard. Though that counts as police custody, I guess," Willow said.
Beckett glared at the women - apparently, Castle thought, she had not been impressed by his tales about the Red Witch. "How can you talk about clothes with this hanging over our heads?"
"Fashion's important!" Buffy said, with a wide smile.
"Murder's a bit more important than fashion." Beckett clenched her teeth and she had that slight twitch near her eyebrow that Castle knew meant she was really angry.
"It's not murder. It's an execution," Xander said.
"Without a trial."
The young man shrugged. "We know he's guilty. If we let him go he'll likely contact more demons. Those who work with them usually do. And I think New York would fare better without a demonic mafia." He scoffed. "Imagine trying to arrest mafia goons with magical enhancements. Or the ability to curse their enemies. Not to mention that he did help demons trying to free a big bad, which is enough to merit the death penalty by itself."
"It's not as if we can lock him up," Castle added. "We're hard-pressed to protect the world without having to guard a prison."
"I could turn him into a rat, and we could keep him in a cage, but that way lies badness." Willow grimaced.
Beckett stared at the witch. "You can turn people into rats?"
"Yes." The redhead nodded. "It's dangerous, though. An acquaintance of us turned herself into a rat to escape a witch burning. She was stuck as a rat for years, though, since rats can't cast spells."
"That witch also turned me into a rat when we were both under the influence of a love spell." Buffy scowled. "It wasn't fun, and when I was turned back I had lost all my clothes!"
"According to what I heard you had already stripped nude in an attempt to seduce Xander before you were turned into a rat," Dawn said, grinning.
"Where did you hear that? Spike? Xander?" Buffy was glaring around.
"I wasn't involved, but I know the story," the vampire said, grinning.
"We all swore never to talk about that day again!" Xander said. "Have you forgotten that Anya starts to talk about her past whenever it is brought up?"
"What does that mean?" Beckett asked. The detective looked slightly shocked - apparently, she hadn't grown as used to the supernatural as Castle had thought. Or maybe he had underestimated the effect close proximity to the Scoobies had on normal people.
"It's a long story," Buffy said.
"Anya worked as the vengeance demon for scorned women and punished men in very cruel and creative ways," Dawn said.
"Apparently not that long," Buffy said. "But we have a mission to accomplish here."
"And we can't just declare it over before it's over," Xander added. "Well, we could, but it would be a bad idea. And we don't have an aircraft carrier."
Castle saw Beckett blink, and decided to move things back on track before the detective suffered an overdose of Scooby trivia. Their war stories made his own sound boring. "So… we need to track Russian immigrants and the dockworkers who helped the demons smuggle the seal in. Who is on which task?"
"Dawn and the detective both speak Russian. That should help gaining their trust," Xander said.
"They fled Russia. I don't think they're easily trusting strangers speaking Russian." Dawn shook her head. "Especially if you or Miss Overprotective keep glaring at them."
"I don't glare!" Buffy said.
"Sure you do! You scared away half my dates!" Dawn retorted.
"Half your dates?" Buffy gaped. "That's not… you dated people I didn't met first?"
"Of course! All who met you were too scared to date me!"
"They wouldn't have been scared if they could be trusted!"
"As if you are a good judge of dating material, given your love life!" Dawn huffed.
"Oy!" Spike said.
"Present company excluded," Dawn added with a smile.
"Present company included!" Xander said.
"Oy!"
Castle was about to attempt to get the planning meeting back on track when the doorbell rang. At once, the spat between the Summers sisters was over.
"Do you expect anyone?" Buffy asked, halfway to the door already, Mr. Pointy in her hand.
"No, I don't," Castle said, grabbing his jacket to cover up his gun holster, if needed.
Vi was at the door, peering through the peephole, while the rest took up positions.
"It's the Special Agent," she said. "And he looks mad."
Castle muttered a curse under his breath. He should have expected this.
*****
"Agent Sorelosoron!" Castle greeted the man with the fakest smile he could manage this side of being polite.
The man glared at him. "Is Kate here?"
Rick was tempted to ask if the man had a warrant, but that would be too much for the obviously tense agent. Probably. Weren't Feds supposed to be more calm? Then again, if he had heard about Beckett being in a shootout, he'd not be calm either.
"Yes," Beckett said behind him.
The agent took in a sharp breath, then tried to push past Castle. For a moment, Rick wanted to stop him. Grab him and tell him to get lost. He was invading a private residence, wasn't he? But Kate would hate that. And he was a better man than that, too. So he stepped to the side, though he couldn't help adding: "I guess manners are not taught at the FBI academy."
"Kate! I just heard that you were in a shootout with Antoinio Marconi's men!"
"You just heard that?" Castle whistled. "Wow, I knew the cooperation between the Feds and the local cops was bad, but that bad?" Both cops glared at him, so he held his hand up. "I'm just making an observation."
"An observation we can do without right now," Agent Can't-take-it-son said. "What happened? Why were in his restaurant?"
"That was his restaurant? That explains the biggest collection of Italian cliches I've ever seen!" Castle shook his head.
"Castle!" Beckett hissed at him.
"Sorry. I'll be quiet now and leave our dear Special Agent to have a special moment." He mimed zipping his lips shut.
"Five bucks say he won't stay silent longer than five minutes!" Vi loudly commented, which caused the Scoobies to chuckle. Even Alexis giggled!
"And who are those people?" The agent gestured at the assembled Scoobies. They had stashed and holstered their weapons, but they were still spread out just right to cover the door, something the agent might just have realised, Castle thought.
"Friends of mine from England," Castle said.
"I knew it!" Vi crowed. "Pay up!"
"I didn't bet, duh," Xander said. "That was the mother of all sucker's bets!"
"He's weaseling out of another bet?" Dawn shook her head. "I thought he had changed his slippery ways."
"I never accepted that bet either!" Xander said.
"And he even won that bet!" Dawn pouted. "He's really bad at this."
"You wanted to lose that bet, duh!" Xander was glaring at the girl now.
"So?" Dawn wrinkled her nose. "You're welching on bets, that's a fact!"
"I am not welching on bets!"
"Dawn! Xander! Stop that!" Buffy snapped, glaring at both. Then she turned to the agent, and smiled so sweetly, Castle could almost fele his teeth starting to rot. "Please excuse my sister and my friend. They'll behave now, so you can continue with… whatever you were doing, I guess."
"What?" The agent was staring at the blonde Slayer.
Castle snorted, which earned him another glare from Beckett - another reason to keep Agent Jealouson away from her; she was usually far more receptive to funny quips, or so Castle thought.
"They are guests of Castle, Will," Beckett said.
The agent was visibly struggling to get his mind back in gear. Rick wasn't surprised - rigid minds usually didn't do well when faced with such situations. Beckett had to have realised that as well, since she was showing far more patience with the agent than she usually had with Castle.
"But… whatever. Kate! What happened?"
"Castle wanted to meet a mob boss, to do some research for his next book. So we went and visited Marconi's favourite restaurant," Beckett explained. "The man did meet with him, but somehow must have taken offense at his questions, since he ordered his men to attack us."
"Well, as far as attacks go, that was barely above an attempt. For hardened criminals, they really were not much to talk about," Vi said. "We shot, what, eight of them?"
"Maybe they are not much to talk about because they misunderstood the Omerta?" Castle said. When no one laughed and Alexis rolled her eyes at him, he pouted. That hadn't been a bad joke. Not one of his best, but still - it wasn't as if their own quips were always award-worthy!
Suddenly, Beckett's very ex-boyfriend lunged for him. "Castle! What did you do?"
Rick could have taken him, of course - he had fought vampires and other demons who were far stronger than a puny Special Agent in a cheap suit - but Vi had the man down on the ground and in a very painful armlock - Castle knew that from experience - before anyone else could do anything.
While Beckett was gaping - hopefully shocked at the potential for unprovoked violence her ex-boyfriend had been displaying - Castle was thinking of how to work that in his next book, and Buffy was criticising his Slayer's form, Spike shook his head and said: "Oy… I want it on record that I had nothing to do with this assault on a cop!"
Trust the damn vampire to totally misrepresent the situation!
*****
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New York, October 2009
Starfox5
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New York, October 2009
While Richard Castle was glaring at Spike, who was looking as if he didn't know exactly what he had done, the special agent in question was making himself heard.
"Let me up! Attacking a special agent of the FBI is a crime!"
"Yeah? So is attacking an author!" Vi snapped. Rick's Slayer was straddling the man's back, her grip on his arm forcing his face into the floor.
"Let him up, Vi," Castle said. "I don't think he'll try to attack me again." Rick doubted that the man's fragile ego would be able to handle that.
Almost growling, the redhead released the agent and stood up.
Beckett's very ex-boyfriend was enraged, his cheap suit rumpled - not torn though, Castle noted. He was rubbing his arm, but his attention was on the author. "What did you do to cause a shootout with a notorious criminal?"
Castle shot a glance at Beckett. When he had agreed to her plan, he hadn't agreed to this. She knew he couldn't exactly explain the real reason for the mob's attack to the special agent. She wasn't even looking at him, but glaring at her ex-boyfriend. Which was, Castle had to admit, probably a good thing. He was the ruggedly handsome, rich and brave demon hunter, and Agent Alsoson was the former lover who couldn't control his temper and acted all possessive. Or protective. Castle shrugged. "I believe - and that's just an assumption, mind you - that the not so good mob boss misinterpreted a planned plot - more like a subplot, really - for my next book. He must have thought I was talking about a criminal operation of his."
"What?"
Castle ignored the brief but incredulous glance from Beckett at him and shrugged at his wanna-be rival. "A freak coincidence, I think. How was I to know that he actually was involved with demon cultists?"
And now the entire room was glaring at him from behind Soso's back. Didn't they realise that the best way to hide the truth was to state it in a way so no one would believe it?
At least the agent was playing his intended role. "Stop with your games, Castle! An experienced mafia leader does not suddenly attack someone over a dime novel plot! Tell me the truth!"
"Dime novel plot?" Castle was incensed. "I'll have you know that my bestselling books are priced far higher than that!"
"Yes!" At least Dawn valiantly came to his defense. "He writes great books!"
"Leave the literary merit of Castle's books out of this, Will," Beckett cut in. Castle grinned - he was her favourite author, after all. Insulting his work was insulting her taste. "As unbelievable as it sounds, Castle really was discussing a demon plot with Marconi when the man lost it."
"Marconi probably had an overly active imagination, coupled with the paranoia a career criminal like him would develop over the years. So, when he thought he was exposed, he panicked." Xander shrugged. "Foiled by Fantasy."
Rick had to admit that was a nice one-liner. He should be able to use that in his book.
"You told them about this but you didn't inform me?" The former boyfriend was working on cementing his status, Castle noted. Women didn't like that sort of comment.
Beckett was no exception. "I wasn't aware I had to inform you about everything that's going on in my life as soon as it happens, Will. You're not part of my life any more, remember?" Oh, yes - scorned woman there, Castle thought.
"A shootout you could have been killed in while working on my case is something I should know about!" the good agent snapped. "And you're talking about this with civilians?"
"I was talking with them about it, as it happened," Castle said.
"And there was no real danger!" Vi was glaring at the agent. "I easily took care of those thugs."
"I'm certain he didn't intend to slight your skill as a bodyguard, Vi," Castle said. He knew that his Slayer was a bit sensitive when her skills were put in doubt, especially in the presence of Buffy and Faith.
"He better not or I demonstrate takedown techniques on him again!" The redhead huffed.
"If you do, try to grab his wrist for additional leverage," Buffy said, smiling brightly. "Other than that I think your form was very good!"
While Vi beamed and the special agent gaped at the blonde, Castle saw that Beckett was rolling her eyes. She was probably not happy that Vi had insinuated that the detective had needed her protection as well.
"This…" The agent was shaking his head. "This is madness!"
"This is Sparta!" Xander quickly said. That earned him half a dozen glares.
"No, this is not Sparta! We're not about to drop the good agent down a well." Buffy said. "We don't even have a well here."
"The window would do. Pigs don't fly." Faith said.
"I could arrest you all for obstruction of justice and assault!"
"My lawyer is still ready to bury you, Agent!" Castle said.
"Not literally, of course!" Buffy said. "We don't hire that kind of lawyer."
"Being buried is not really a bad thing, under the right circumstances," Spike said. "It's an experience."
The agent was close to losing it, Castle realised. He was far too tense and glaring around. The Slayers had noticed already, and had moved closer, just in case. And while the good agent's ego could probably use another face-to-floor meeting, Castle doubted Beckett would appreciate it. And the agent could make some trouble for them - not much, and nothing they couldn't deal with, but they had an apocalypse to stop. He held up his hands. "Everybody calm down, please. Let us deal with this as rational adults."
Castle frowned at the looks directed at him right then.
"So, you see, Agent Soandson, I was not asking about anything related to your serial killer, but a hypothetical smuggling of a cursed artifact," Castle finished explaining a bit later. "We haven't told our friends anything they didn't already knew from the newspapers, either. We've been perfectly good." He ignored Vi's snorting and smiled at the other man.
"For a certain definition of good," Buffy said. Castle ignored that as well.
Sadly, the special agent didn't seem to appreciate his explanation. He was calmer now, though. Or colder. A kind of cold fury. Castle shook his head - he couldn't use that in his next book. It wouldn't fit the bumbling federal agent character he was writing. Impotent fury was more like it.
"How stupid do you think I am?"
Castle was certain the man didn't want an honest answer.
The Fed stared at him. "You are far too calm to have been in a shootout. As is the girl there." The man hadn't really looked at Vi since she had introduced him to the flat's floor, Castle realised. Wounded ego, much? "Kate's acting weird about it as well. And everyone here seems to treat a shooting in a restaurant that left several people dead and even more wounded as a joke!"
Castle glanced to Beckett. That sounded more than a bit familiar. She was tense too, he noticed. He should have expected this, Rick thought - Beckett wouldn't have been involved with Agent Meddlesome if he actually was stupid.
"Are you on drugs?"
Castle blinked. He hadn't expected that. Before he could answer the man's question, though, Buffy piped up, all Californian Valley girl. "Does coffee count as a drug? I mean, I read once that it should count, since we grow addicted to caffeine, and if I don't get my morning cup I'm all grumpy and growly - although even then I'm not as frazzled as Dawn claims." The blonde Slayer ignored her sisters 'I've got video evidence!' and continued: "But if it was a drug, wouldn't it be at least restricted or prohibited? Although, Willow said prohibition doesn't work and only helps the drug dealers."
The Special Agent was looking like he wanted to be on drugs. Castle had to suppress a chuckle - Buffy had the airhead babbling down to an artform. An artform not everyone appreciated, he amended after a glance at Beckett. He sighed. "No, we're not on drugs. We're just eccentric, and prefer to joke to deal with trauma." He grinned. "As you may have noticed, Vi is a very skilled bodyguard. Buffy, Faith and Xander trained her."
"So, what are you? Some private military contractors just visiting?" The good agent was still suspicious, of course.
"We're not exactly military," Xander said. Buffy snorted. "We're private security, based in Britain."
"I've made the acquaintance of their boss when I was studying in London and working part-time in a library." Castle smiled. "I met my first wife there as well."
"And you expect me to believe that it's just a coincidence that you're all here?" The Fed scoffed. "I should have you all deported!"
"Good luck with that," Buffy snorted. "We've got diplomatic impunity."
Castle hoped the agent would think that was a joke.
While Richard Castle was glaring at Spike, who was looking as if he didn't know exactly what he had done, the special agent in question was making himself heard.
"Let me up! Attacking a special agent of the FBI is a crime!"
"Yeah? So is attacking an author!" Vi snapped. Rick's Slayer was straddling the man's back, her grip on his arm forcing his face into the floor.
"Let him up, Vi," Castle said. "I don't think he'll try to attack me again." Rick doubted that the man's fragile ego would be able to handle that.
Almost growling, the redhead released the agent and stood up.
Beckett's very ex-boyfriend was enraged, his cheap suit rumpled - not torn though, Castle noted. He was rubbing his arm, but his attention was on the author. "What did you do to cause a shootout with a notorious criminal?"
Castle shot a glance at Beckett. When he had agreed to her plan, he hadn't agreed to this. She knew he couldn't exactly explain the real reason for the mob's attack to the special agent. She wasn't even looking at him, but glaring at her ex-boyfriend. Which was, Castle had to admit, probably a good thing. He was the ruggedly handsome, rich and brave demon hunter, and Agent Alsoson was the former lover who couldn't control his temper and acted all possessive. Or protective. Castle shrugged. "I believe - and that's just an assumption, mind you - that the not so good mob boss misinterpreted a planned plot - more like a subplot, really - for my next book. He must have thought I was talking about a criminal operation of his."
"What?"
Castle ignored the brief but incredulous glance from Beckett at him and shrugged at his wanna-be rival. "A freak coincidence, I think. How was I to know that he actually was involved with demon cultists?"
And now the entire room was glaring at him from behind Soso's back. Didn't they realise that the best way to hide the truth was to state it in a way so no one would believe it?
At least the agent was playing his intended role. "Stop with your games, Castle! An experienced mafia leader does not suddenly attack someone over a dime novel plot! Tell me the truth!"
"Dime novel plot?" Castle was incensed. "I'll have you know that my bestselling books are priced far higher than that!"
"Yes!" At least Dawn valiantly came to his defense. "He writes great books!"
"Leave the literary merit of Castle's books out of this, Will," Beckett cut in. Castle grinned - he was her favourite author, after all. Insulting his work was insulting her taste. "As unbelievable as it sounds, Castle really was discussing a demon plot with Marconi when the man lost it."
"Marconi probably had an overly active imagination, coupled with the paranoia a career criminal like him would develop over the years. So, when he thought he was exposed, he panicked." Xander shrugged. "Foiled by Fantasy."
Rick had to admit that was a nice one-liner. He should be able to use that in his book.
"You told them about this but you didn't inform me?" The former boyfriend was working on cementing his status, Castle noted. Women didn't like that sort of comment.
Beckett was no exception. "I wasn't aware I had to inform you about everything that's going on in my life as soon as it happens, Will. You're not part of my life any more, remember?" Oh, yes - scorned woman there, Castle thought.
"A shootout you could have been killed in while working on my case is something I should know about!" the good agent snapped. "And you're talking about this with civilians?"
"I was talking with them about it, as it happened," Castle said.
"And there was no real danger!" Vi was glaring at the agent. "I easily took care of those thugs."
"I'm certain he didn't intend to slight your skill as a bodyguard, Vi," Castle said. He knew that his Slayer was a bit sensitive when her skills were put in doubt, especially in the presence of Buffy and Faith.
"He better not or I demonstrate takedown techniques on him again!" The redhead huffed.
"If you do, try to grab his wrist for additional leverage," Buffy said, smiling brightly. "Other than that I think your form was very good!"
While Vi beamed and the special agent gaped at the blonde, Castle saw that Beckett was rolling her eyes. She was probably not happy that Vi had insinuated that the detective had needed her protection as well.
"This…" The agent was shaking his head. "This is madness!"
"This is Sparta!" Xander quickly said. That earned him half a dozen glares.
"No, this is not Sparta! We're not about to drop the good agent down a well." Buffy said. "We don't even have a well here."
"The window would do. Pigs don't fly." Faith said.
"I could arrest you all for obstruction of justice and assault!"
"My lawyer is still ready to bury you, Agent!" Castle said.
"Not literally, of course!" Buffy said. "We don't hire that kind of lawyer."
"Being buried is not really a bad thing, under the right circumstances," Spike said. "It's an experience."
The agent was close to losing it, Castle realised. He was far too tense and glaring around. The Slayers had noticed already, and had moved closer, just in case. And while the good agent's ego could probably use another face-to-floor meeting, Castle doubted Beckett would appreciate it. And the agent could make some trouble for them - not much, and nothing they couldn't deal with, but they had an apocalypse to stop. He held up his hands. "Everybody calm down, please. Let us deal with this as rational adults."
Castle frowned at the looks directed at him right then.
*****
"So, you see, Agent Soandson, I was not asking about anything related to your serial killer, but a hypothetical smuggling of a cursed artifact," Castle finished explaining a bit later. "We haven't told our friends anything they didn't already knew from the newspapers, either. We've been perfectly good." He ignored Vi's snorting and smiled at the other man.
"For a certain definition of good," Buffy said. Castle ignored that as well.
Sadly, the special agent didn't seem to appreciate his explanation. He was calmer now, though. Or colder. A kind of cold fury. Castle shook his head - he couldn't use that in his next book. It wouldn't fit the bumbling federal agent character he was writing. Impotent fury was more like it.
"How stupid do you think I am?"
Castle was certain the man didn't want an honest answer.
The Fed stared at him. "You are far too calm to have been in a shootout. As is the girl there." The man hadn't really looked at Vi since she had introduced him to the flat's floor, Castle realised. Wounded ego, much? "Kate's acting weird about it as well. And everyone here seems to treat a shooting in a restaurant that left several people dead and even more wounded as a joke!"
Castle glanced to Beckett. That sounded more than a bit familiar. She was tense too, he noticed. He should have expected this, Rick thought - Beckett wouldn't have been involved with Agent Meddlesome if he actually was stupid.
"Are you on drugs?"
Castle blinked. He hadn't expected that. Before he could answer the man's question, though, Buffy piped up, all Californian Valley girl. "Does coffee count as a drug? I mean, I read once that it should count, since we grow addicted to caffeine, and if I don't get my morning cup I'm all grumpy and growly - although even then I'm not as frazzled as Dawn claims." The blonde Slayer ignored her sisters 'I've got video evidence!' and continued: "But if it was a drug, wouldn't it be at least restricted or prohibited? Although, Willow said prohibition doesn't work and only helps the drug dealers."
The Special Agent was looking like he wanted to be on drugs. Castle had to suppress a chuckle - Buffy had the airhead babbling down to an artform. An artform not everyone appreciated, he amended after a glance at Beckett. He sighed. "No, we're not on drugs. We're just eccentric, and prefer to joke to deal with trauma." He grinned. "As you may have noticed, Vi is a very skilled bodyguard. Buffy, Faith and Xander trained her."
"So, what are you? Some private military contractors just visiting?" The good agent was still suspicious, of course.
"We're not exactly military," Xander said. Buffy snorted. "We're private security, based in Britain."
"I've made the acquaintance of their boss when I was studying in London and working part-time in a library." Castle smiled. "I met my first wife there as well."
"And you expect me to believe that it's just a coincidence that you're all here?" The Fed scoffed. "I should have you all deported!"
"Good luck with that," Buffy snorted. "We've got diplomatic impunity."
Castle hoped the agent would think that was a joke.
*****
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Did you mean immunity? Or was that Buffy style wordplay?
Starfox5
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Worldplay as well as Buffy playing the bimbo.
Walkir
Super Happy Awesome Fun Time
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Now there's an image...
Tranquil Zebra
Equid of Peerless Tranquility
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Considering the sensitivity of their work, it might even be the strict truth...
New York, October 2009
Starfox5
Experienced.
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New York, October 2009
"I think that went well," Richard Castle said when the not so good special agent had finally left his apartment again.
"If that's your definition of 'well' I don't want to know what you'd consider a 'bad' outcome," Beckett said, glaring at him as if anything was his fault, instead of the fault of Agent Stalkinson.
"Someone hurt, or killed," Buffy said.
"What?" Beckett had that peculiar expression again, where she left her mouth halfway open. Adorable, Castle thought, although he'd never say it out loud.
"The usual definition of a bad outcome," the blonde Slayer clarified.
"Well, Buffy, someone getting hurt doesn't have to be a bad outcome, if it was needed to save others," Xander cut in.
"I'm pretty sure that the dear agent was hurt," Dawn added.
"He doesn't count," Buffy said. "He asked for this when he attacked Rick. We can't let people attack our Watchers like that. They're a bit too breakable. And if we lose one, we might get an über-tweedy replacement who'll need a lot of sense knocked into him, which might break him as well, and… where was I going with this?"
"To Stupid Town. Population: One blonde." Dawn said, shaking her head.
When that received a few chuckles, Buffy pouted. "What's this, pick on Buffy day?"
"It's always pick on Buffy day," Dawn said, grinning. "Her ego would grow too large for our ecosystem if it wasn't regularly cut down to size."
"Can you be serious, for once?" Beckett snapped. The detective wasn't looking amused at all. "I know Will. As soon as he has the opportunity, he'll investigate. And he'll not give up until he's found the truth."
"The truth? He can't handle the truth," Xander said. "I'd wager he'll go full Sunnydale."
"What?"
"That's Scooby-speak for 'he'll ignore the supernatural and forget about it'," Castle explained to Beckett. "A lot of people react like that when confronted with magic and demons. They rationalise it away."
"Sometimes they try to burn you at the stake instead, though," Buffy said, frowning.
"They were under the influence of a demon, Buffy," Willow said. "In Sunnydale, even some people who were bitten by a vampire and survived repressed the experience and rationalised it - or simply ignored it. Although according to a theory that was an effect of the Hellmouth, to keep the humans from fleeing the place once they realised how many people died there."
"You have to feed all those demons attracted to a Hellmouth. And catering or takeout would get far too expensive," Xander said, nodding sagely.
"Will isn't like that." Beckett crossed her arms, her expression daring anyone to contradict her.
Castle was tempted to, but decided against it. The detective looked a bit too tense for a rational discussion. He'd offer a massage to help with that, but she'd probably take it the wrong way. "We'll see. Now, we have to plan our next step."
"You're not drinking that in my car!" Castle glared at the vampire sitting next to him, who had just pulled out a blood bag from his coat. "If you get blood over the seats… is that a thermal bag?"
"Of course it is. I only drink cold blood with cereal!" Spike said. "And don't fret, mate. I haven't spilled blood in decades. Well, not like that, you know."
"We are all aware of how much blood you have spilled, Spike," Buffy, who had unfairly and illegally called dibs on Castle's usual seat, said, looking over her shoulder at them.
"That is beside the point. I don't want you to open a bag of blood in my car. Not while Vi is driving!"
"Are you criticising my driving?" the redhead asked, glaring at him.
"No, I'm not. Eyes front!" Castle retorted, as Vi took the next turn with barely a glance. "Show off," he mumbled, earning him a smirk.
"Can we stop for a drink then? Interrogating dockworkers is thirsty work," Spike said.
"Work? You glared at them and they wet their pants!" Buffy scoffed. "That's not work!"
"I had to shake down the last one!" Spike protested.
"You had fun doing that."
"No one said work can't be fun, Slayer."
"If it's fun it's not work!" Buffy said, pouting.
"If you're getting paid for it, it's work."
"Well, you're not getting paid!" Buffy huffed.
"I am getting paid by the Council. A regular salary, even."
Buffy's pout deepened. "We're not stopping anyway - we're on the clock! We've got an apocalypse to stop! You can drink your blood at Rick's flat."
"We stopped so you could get a hot dog!"
"That's different!"
"How?"
"It is!"
"You're just jealous that you can't terrify people without beating them up."
"I so can terrify people!" Buffy turned to Castle. "I can, right?"
Fortunately, Castle hadn't to answer that - he was certain that there was no right answer - since Spike snorted. "He doesn't count, he knows what you can do, Slayer." And the two were bickering again.
Castle exchanged a glance with Vi. For a change, the Watcher and his Slayer seemed to be in complete agreement. She sped up. The sooner they were back home, the better. At least they had knew which van the demons had used to move the seal - one of the dockworkers had been quite observant, and noticed that the van had been a rental. Even if it was stolen, they should be able to track it. Unless the demons had been smarter than the average criminal.
By the time they arrived at Castle's apartment, he knew more about the history between Buffy and Spike, and Spike's personal unlife, than he had ever wanted to know. And Buffy had complained about middle-aged Loremasters seducing young Vampire Hunters? Though he wasn't quite certain who had seduced whom, in that case. And if there still was a relationship. Or a 'co-workers with benefits' arrangement. He could ask Rupert, he thought. Or sound out Vi - his Slayer probably knew more about that sort of gossip than Castle. Heck, Alexis probably knew more about Council gossip than Rick. And wasn't that a terrifying thought!
"We have returned, bearing important information!" he announced when he entered his apartment. The rest of the group was gathered in his living room, spread out over several of his couches and seats. Willow was still glued to her laptop, which probably had more processing power than most supercomputers. Dawn was barely visible behind a wall of book stacks. Most of them from his library. Faith was munching on the cashew nuts Castle had had imported, and Xander was showing Alexis how to make homemade explosives.
He blinked. "Alexis!"
His daughter smiled innocently at him. "Dad?"
"What are you doing?"
"Learning how to make a bomb," his daughter told him.
"I can see that!"
"Why do you ask then?" Alexis was looking at him with that disapproving expression he was so familiar with. Like his mother's, just more effective.
"Well, he's old. I heard the mind is the first thing to go when you're growing old," Buffy said with a smile.
He glared at her, then turned back to Alexis. "Why are you learning how to make a bomb?" If the special agent had seen that...
"So I can make one when we need one, of course," she said. "I'd rather know what I'm doing when I'm cooking up explosives in our kitchen."
Castle's first impulse was to tell her to go to her room, and then look for good boarding schools. His second impulse was to tell Xander to stop corrupting his little angel. He wasn't quite as stupid to do either, of course - contrary to his mother's frequently and loudly voiced opinion. He said: "Does your mother know what you're doing?" Mary was a very traditional Watcher. She had never approved of Rick's flamethrower, so she should go ballistic when she heard about Alexis learning how to make bombs.
"She knows I'm getting lessons and training from experienced Watchers." Alexis smiled widely. In other words, Castle's little angel had managed to pull one over his ex-wife. Rick didn't know if he should be proud or appalled. He shook his head with a wry grin and went to get himself some coffee.
"See, Buffy, Rick's got his priorities straight: No bitching about bedtimes when the world is at risk!" Dawn said.
"That's different!" the blonde Slayer said.
"How so?"
"It just is!"
"That's no argument!"
"Right. We're not having an argument about this because I'm right!" Buffy turned away from her sister and joined Castle for coffee.
"So, what did you find out?" Xander asked.
"We found out that the demons transported the seal in a rental van. Probably rented from Avis using a fake address," Castle said while his cup was slowly filling with black Italian coffee. "But since it's a new model it should have a locator beacon built in which can be tracked." Technology was wonderful for hunting demons, Castle thought. He would have to be careful when turning this into a novel, though, to avoid giving the bad guys and demons pointers.
"On it!" Willow said, her finger flying over her laptop's keyboard. "Alexis, do you want to see how to hack into a car rental company?"
"Yes!" Alexis hurried over to the witch.
Castle sighed. Other fathers had to deal with their little girls growing up and coming home with boys. He had to deal with his little girl growing up and learning how to commit several felonies in order to hunt demons.
His mother said it was karma.
*****
"I think that went well," Richard Castle said when the not so good special agent had finally left his apartment again.
"If that's your definition of 'well' I don't want to know what you'd consider a 'bad' outcome," Beckett said, glaring at him as if anything was his fault, instead of the fault of Agent Stalkinson.
"Someone hurt, or killed," Buffy said.
"What?" Beckett had that peculiar expression again, where she left her mouth halfway open. Adorable, Castle thought, although he'd never say it out loud.
"The usual definition of a bad outcome," the blonde Slayer clarified.
"Well, Buffy, someone getting hurt doesn't have to be a bad outcome, if it was needed to save others," Xander cut in.
"I'm pretty sure that the dear agent was hurt," Dawn added.
"He doesn't count," Buffy said. "He asked for this when he attacked Rick. We can't let people attack our Watchers like that. They're a bit too breakable. And if we lose one, we might get an über-tweedy replacement who'll need a lot of sense knocked into him, which might break him as well, and… where was I going with this?"
"To Stupid Town. Population: One blonde." Dawn said, shaking her head.
When that received a few chuckles, Buffy pouted. "What's this, pick on Buffy day?"
"It's always pick on Buffy day," Dawn said, grinning. "Her ego would grow too large for our ecosystem if it wasn't regularly cut down to size."
"Can you be serious, for once?" Beckett snapped. The detective wasn't looking amused at all. "I know Will. As soon as he has the opportunity, he'll investigate. And he'll not give up until he's found the truth."
"The truth? He can't handle the truth," Xander said. "I'd wager he'll go full Sunnydale."
"What?"
"That's Scooby-speak for 'he'll ignore the supernatural and forget about it'," Castle explained to Beckett. "A lot of people react like that when confronted with magic and demons. They rationalise it away."
"Sometimes they try to burn you at the stake instead, though," Buffy said, frowning.
"They were under the influence of a demon, Buffy," Willow said. "In Sunnydale, even some people who were bitten by a vampire and survived repressed the experience and rationalised it - or simply ignored it. Although according to a theory that was an effect of the Hellmouth, to keep the humans from fleeing the place once they realised how many people died there."
"You have to feed all those demons attracted to a Hellmouth. And catering or takeout would get far too expensive," Xander said, nodding sagely.
"Will isn't like that." Beckett crossed her arms, her expression daring anyone to contradict her.
Castle was tempted to, but decided against it. The detective looked a bit too tense for a rational discussion. He'd offer a massage to help with that, but she'd probably take it the wrong way. "We'll see. Now, we have to plan our next step."
*****
"You're not drinking that in my car!" Castle glared at the vampire sitting next to him, who had just pulled out a blood bag from his coat. "If you get blood over the seats… is that a thermal bag?"
"Of course it is. I only drink cold blood with cereal!" Spike said. "And don't fret, mate. I haven't spilled blood in decades. Well, not like that, you know."
"We are all aware of how much blood you have spilled, Spike," Buffy, who had unfairly and illegally called dibs on Castle's usual seat, said, looking over her shoulder at them.
"That is beside the point. I don't want you to open a bag of blood in my car. Not while Vi is driving!"
"Are you criticising my driving?" the redhead asked, glaring at him.
"No, I'm not. Eyes front!" Castle retorted, as Vi took the next turn with barely a glance. "Show off," he mumbled, earning him a smirk.
"Can we stop for a drink then? Interrogating dockworkers is thirsty work," Spike said.
"Work? You glared at them and they wet their pants!" Buffy scoffed. "That's not work!"
"I had to shake down the last one!" Spike protested.
"You had fun doing that."
"No one said work can't be fun, Slayer."
"If it's fun it's not work!" Buffy said, pouting.
"If you're getting paid for it, it's work."
"Well, you're not getting paid!" Buffy huffed.
"I am getting paid by the Council. A regular salary, even."
Buffy's pout deepened. "We're not stopping anyway - we're on the clock! We've got an apocalypse to stop! You can drink your blood at Rick's flat."
"We stopped so you could get a hot dog!"
"That's different!"
"How?"
"It is!"
"You're just jealous that you can't terrify people without beating them up."
"I so can terrify people!" Buffy turned to Castle. "I can, right?"
Fortunately, Castle hadn't to answer that - he was certain that there was no right answer - since Spike snorted. "He doesn't count, he knows what you can do, Slayer." And the two were bickering again.
Castle exchanged a glance with Vi. For a change, the Watcher and his Slayer seemed to be in complete agreement. She sped up. The sooner they were back home, the better. At least they had knew which van the demons had used to move the seal - one of the dockworkers had been quite observant, and noticed that the van had been a rental. Even if it was stolen, they should be able to track it. Unless the demons had been smarter than the average criminal.
*****
By the time they arrived at Castle's apartment, he knew more about the history between Buffy and Spike, and Spike's personal unlife, than he had ever wanted to know. And Buffy had complained about middle-aged Loremasters seducing young Vampire Hunters? Though he wasn't quite certain who had seduced whom, in that case. And if there still was a relationship. Or a 'co-workers with benefits' arrangement. He could ask Rupert, he thought. Or sound out Vi - his Slayer probably knew more about that sort of gossip than Castle. Heck, Alexis probably knew more about Council gossip than Rick. And wasn't that a terrifying thought!
"We have returned, bearing important information!" he announced when he entered his apartment. The rest of the group was gathered in his living room, spread out over several of his couches and seats. Willow was still glued to her laptop, which probably had more processing power than most supercomputers. Dawn was barely visible behind a wall of book stacks. Most of them from his library. Faith was munching on the cashew nuts Castle had had imported, and Xander was showing Alexis how to make homemade explosives.
He blinked. "Alexis!"
His daughter smiled innocently at him. "Dad?"
"What are you doing?"
"Learning how to make a bomb," his daughter told him.
"I can see that!"
"Why do you ask then?" Alexis was looking at him with that disapproving expression he was so familiar with. Like his mother's, just more effective.
"Well, he's old. I heard the mind is the first thing to go when you're growing old," Buffy said with a smile.
He glared at her, then turned back to Alexis. "Why are you learning how to make a bomb?" If the special agent had seen that...
"So I can make one when we need one, of course," she said. "I'd rather know what I'm doing when I'm cooking up explosives in our kitchen."
Castle's first impulse was to tell her to go to her room, and then look for good boarding schools. His second impulse was to tell Xander to stop corrupting his little angel. He wasn't quite as stupid to do either, of course - contrary to his mother's frequently and loudly voiced opinion. He said: "Does your mother know what you're doing?" Mary was a very traditional Watcher. She had never approved of Rick's flamethrower, so she should go ballistic when she heard about Alexis learning how to make bombs.
"She knows I'm getting lessons and training from experienced Watchers." Alexis smiled widely. In other words, Castle's little angel had managed to pull one over his ex-wife. Rick didn't know if he should be proud or appalled. He shook his head with a wry grin and went to get himself some coffee.
"See, Buffy, Rick's got his priorities straight: No bitching about bedtimes when the world is at risk!" Dawn said.
"That's different!" the blonde Slayer said.
"How so?"
"It just is!"
"That's no argument!"
"Right. We're not having an argument about this because I'm right!" Buffy turned away from her sister and joined Castle for coffee.
"So, what did you find out?" Xander asked.
"We found out that the demons transported the seal in a rental van. Probably rented from Avis using a fake address," Castle said while his cup was slowly filling with black Italian coffee. "But since it's a new model it should have a locator beacon built in which can be tracked." Technology was wonderful for hunting demons, Castle thought. He would have to be careful when turning this into a novel, though, to avoid giving the bad guys and demons pointers.
"On it!" Willow said, her finger flying over her laptop's keyboard. "Alexis, do you want to see how to hack into a car rental company?"
"Yes!" Alexis hurried over to the witch.
Castle sighed. Other fathers had to deal with their little girls growing up and coming home with boys. He had to deal with his little girl growing up and learning how to commit several felonies in order to hunt demons.
His mother said it was karma.
*****
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I always did love Alexis. Now to figure out if she's the responsible one, or if Rodgers just get crazier with age.
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