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[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

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Childhood Friends: Ilia
This is a commission I wrote.
- - -

Ilia slowly woke up from a painfilled, troubled sleep. She was sore, and felt the lingering effects of Aura transfer. She opened her eyes cautiously, and took in her surroundings.

She was in a hospital room, hooked up to medical sensors that projected her vitals. And a young blond human boy was sitting at her side, looking bored. He couldn't be any more than 15 years old, though he was tall for his age. He looked over and noticed her. He smiled.

"Hey! You're awake!" he said cheerfully. "How are you feeling? What do you remember?"

Ilia scowled.

"Where am I? What is this place?! Who are you?!"

"Oh, uh, this is Arc-En-Ciel Hospital, in Radian, Gallia, Vale," the boy said, "And I'm Jaune Arc! I'm just an intern nurse right now but I'm here to help! What can you tell me about what happened?"

The op had gone bad. They had been trying to steal a shipment of Dust from an SDC train. Something had gone wrong, there was an explosion… She scowled at the unassuming boy. It would be just like them to put an innocent looking kid in here to get her to lower her guard.

"I won't tell you anything," she hissed, "human!"

The boy sighed.

"Well… The chart says you got caught in a Dust explosion," Jaune said, "Suffered a concussion and a lot of burns. Can I check to see how you're doing?"

Ilia continued to glare, her skin turning red in anger. He smiled.

"I just want to make sure you're okay."

"My people will come for me," Ilia growled, "They'll get me out of here."

She tried to sit up… And immediately slumped back down, nauseous. The boy held up a sick bag and she vomited into it.

"Yeah, you're definitely still suffering from a concussion," the boy sighed. He took the sickbag and put it into a medical waste bin. He got her some water in a bottle with a straw sticking out of the top. "Here."

Ilia glared. Jaune shook his head.

"It's all right. It's just water."

Ilia was thirsty. Very much so. She couldn't exactly make her escape if she was weak. So she sipped the water, glaring all the time.

"Can you remember your name?" Jaune asked. "Where you were born?"

Ilia's skin flashed several different colors. His eyes widened. She scowled harder.

Here it comes, she thought, hatred and disgust and fear and-

"Wow! You're a chameleon Faunus? That's so cool!" Jaune gushed. Ilia stared, her spots turning red and pink.

"Wh-What?"

"That's so amazing!" Jaune continued, leaning forward eagerly. "That's really cool! Can you do all sorts of patterns and stuff?"

"I…" Ilia was taken aback. She'd… Never been asked that. Not once. Out of reflex, her skin color and patterns changed rapidly. Jaune beamed.

"That's incredible," he said. "And it proves you're healing well if you can do that! My mom's the best doctor around!"

"... I see," Ilia murmured. She looked over her skin: She remembered burns, so many burns all over her body… But she couldn't see a trace. Not even the hints of scar tissue.

A human… Did this for me…? Ilia wondered. Humans did this for me?

"So, what is your name? Do you remember it?" Jaune asked.

Ilia stared at him intensely. She took a breath.

"Yes… But I'm not sharing it," she said, "My friends will come for me."

Jaune shrugged.

"Okay. They'll just have to check you out at the front desk then," he said. "You wanna call them?"

He pointed to the phone by the hospital bed. Ilia sucked in a deep breath.

"... Sure."

It was risky, but she knew a burner Scroll to call in case of emergencies. Jaune stood up and walked out. Ilia scowled as he left.

One kind human… Two kind humans… What does it matter?

She made the call. She waited…

"What?" A cold voice demanded. Ilia felt some relief though-It was Adam.

"I need… I need someone to check me out-Get me out of here-"

"We assessed the possibility of doing that. It would take too many resources," Adam stated. A pit formed in Ilia's stomach.

"But-You can't just-I've worked so hard-!"

"You let yourself be taken by the humans," Adam scoffed, "Your weakness betrays you. Blake believes you are dead. That is far better than letting her think you betrayed us."

"I didn't betray you, I'm still loyal!" Ilia insisted.

"Then why would the humans treat you so well?" Adam demanded. "As I said, Blake believes you are dead. Stay that way. If you come back it will be in disgrace and death."

The line went dead. Ilia stared at the phone receiver. Tears began to fall from her eyes.

She heard Jaune enter again. She felt his arms go around her-Comforting and warm.

"Hey… Are you okay?" Jaune asked quietly, "What's wrong?"

"... Ilia," she sobbed.

"Huh?"

"That's… That's my name. Ilia," Ilia cried, pushing her face into his chest. Confused, Jaune hugged her tightly.

"Ilia… That's a pretty name… Did you… Did you reach anyone who could help?"

"... No," Ilia whispered. "Nobody… I-I'm… I'm all… Alone."

Jaune held her for a while. He shook his head.

"Not anymore, Ilia. I… I'll ask my parents to help. We'll get you a job, promise. And I'll be your friend. Forever."

Ilia sniffled.

"You promise?"

"Always," Jaune whispered.

- - -

Two Years Later…

Ruby Rose stepped off the airship, squinting a bit at the bright sunlight. She took in the expanse of Beacon Academy before her, grinning despite her nervousness. Sure, being abandoned by her sister was a bit terrifying but she… She could do this! She could-!

She bumped into someone, and Dust went off in an explosion. She slammed into the pavement, digging a crater out with her face.

"Owww…!"

"Careful, you idiot!"

Ruby looked up. A white haired girl in white clothing scowled down at her, getting her various containers of Dust organized. Ruby winced.

"I'm sorry-HEY! You shouldn't ship that much Dust anyway!"

"You shouldn't be clumsy, little girl!" The girl sniffed.

"Hey. Need help?"

Ruby looked to her right. She saw an armored hand reach out to her. She followed the hand up his arm to his face: A kind, warm face with blond hair and blue eyes. Ruby flushed and didn't know why as he helped her stand up.

"Everyone okay?" He asked.

"Um, y-yes," Ruby managed. "Just me, a normal girl with normal knees!"

Smooth, her mind sarcastically supplied.

"Cool," he said, "I'm Jaune Arc. You are?"

"Ruby Rose," Ruby said with a nervous smile. His smile remained warm and friendly.

Jaune looked over at the young woman in white.

"You could be more careful, you know," he gently admonished her. The white haired girl blushed and sniffed.

"She should be! I am a Dust Expert! The Dust Expert! Weiss Schnee, of the Schnee Family!"

"The same family that employs slave labor of Faunus in their Dust Mines?" A black haired girl with a large, prominent bow asked dryly, walking by while carrying several books. Weiss flushed angrily.

"That's-That's all in the past! We stopped doing that-!"

"Not according to the news," another girl stated. She was dressed in a hoodie which shadowed her face. She stepped up to Jaune's side and took his hand. They shared a warm, loving look, before the girl turned towards the Schnee girl. She scowled at Weiss too… Before she looked at the dark haired girl. Her eyes widened.

"Blake…?"

The dark haired girl gaped at her in shock.

"Ilia?!"

Blake drew her weapon, a ninjato machine pistol, and pointed it at Ilia. Ilia, in turn, pulled out a whip crackling with electricity and held it up threateningly.

Ruby, Weiss and Jaune looked between the two furious girls. Jaune coughed. Weiss winced. Ruby again displayed her amazing social skills.

"So… I take it you two have met?"

- - -
 
Arslan the Kuudere
I have also had some thoughts for Arslan. We don't really have a proper kuudere character in RWBY-Blake doesn't really count. So since Arslan has to control her emotions for her Semblance, let's make her our kuudere!

She wouldn't be to Rei Ayanami levels. She's more like if Starfire was in the body of Raven and had to keep her emotions under control at all times. And she's warm and kind to people. But her deadpan nature means she often assumes people understand what emotion she was trying to convey. She does have blindspots. But she also has a wicked sense of humor.

Arslan: "I cannot actually cause someone's heart to explode with my Aura techniques... But bandits don't know that and are often stupid. Well, not specifically. It's really hard to blow up someone's heart and I'd prefer not to do it. It's a hassle and if they surrender, they have a chance to redeem themselves."

And of course, she would tease Jaune.

Arslan: "Oh no. You have seen me nude, Jaune Arc."

Jaune: "AH! NO! I-I'm sorry-"

Arslan: "I can no longer be a bride. Will you take responsibility?"

Jaune: "WHAT?!"

Arslan: "... I am joking. Was that not clear?"

It could also explain why Pyrrha, who has terrible social skills, failed to pick up that Arslan wanted to be her friendly rival.
 
Beacon Soapbox Derby
Beacon hosts a Soapbox Derby. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

Weiss : Ruby you can't put an engine on your car.

Ruby: Why not?!

Weiss: Because that makes it not a soapbox car, it's just a gocart! Also, you can't have a dynamic suspension system! The point is that it's supposed to be in budget!"

Ruby: "It is!"

Weiss: "You spent our budget on TIRES!"

Ruby: "WE NEED TIRES!"

Weiss: "NOT RACING CAR TIRES!"

Ruby: "Ugh, I suppose you want me to remove the rocket boosters too!"

Weiss: "YES!"

With Team SSSN...

Neptune: "GUYS! WE NEED TO GET THIS DONE! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO CARES?!"

Scarlet: "Pretty much."

Sage: "Yeah."

Sun: "You won't let me touch anything."

Neptune: "YOU WRECKED IT BEFORE!"

Sun: "But you said you needed the frame assembled together!"

Neptune: "YOU DID IT UPSIDE-DOWN!"

Sun: "So? Can't you just pilot it upside down?"

Neptune: "NO! I WON'T LOOK COOL LIKE THAT!"

Team JNPR works as a well oiled machine... Though they have some hiccups.

Jaune: "We're not dropping grenades, Nora."

Nora: scoff "Well what am I even here for?!"

Team CMEN...

Mercury gets surprisingly into it.

Mercury: "My father had me enter a soapbox derby just so we could assassinate a guy. It was the only time he even acted like a good dad in my entire life. So we're gonna win this, not for him... But for me. ME!"

How does everyone else react to it? What do they build? And who wins the race?
 
Childhood Friends: Adam 3
Jaune had returned to Radian. He had come to the crypt in Arcadia, the great stone fortress of the Arcs. It was after Vytal. They were planning to go after Cinder. He had come to the crypt to pray...

He stopped short. A familiar figure was standing there in the twilight, among the statues.

Jaune: "... Adam?!"

Adam: "..." He was staring at the statues "I remember... I remember coming here with you. To play at being a samurai, a great warrior. I learned the history of the great battles of the Arcs... And I found myself inspired."

Jaune is silent. He walks slowly towards Adam. He stops next to him, afraid, but... Something about Adam's tone is almost reassuring.

Jaune: "I remember. We had wooden swords. You were... Always better than me."

Adam: "... Yes... But you always got back up... And when our mothers were upset with your bruises, you always said you were the one who was clumsy."

Jaune: "I was... I wasn't good at blocking."

There is the tiniest hint of a smile on Adam's face.

Adam: "You threw me under the bus though... The pies at the fair? You took more than you should have."

Jaune: "What? No I didn't. You ate four! I only ate three!"

Adam: "..." chuckles "I ate five."

Jaune: "..." snickers "Me too... We both got in trouble for that. You took the blame."

Adam: "I was older. I should have taken responsibility."

Silence fell. Jaune sucked in a breath.

Jaune: "Adam... Why are you here?"

Adam: A long silence "... You're going after Cinder, aren't you?"

Jaune: "Yeah."

Adam: "You'll die in the attempt. Nothing can stop what is coming."

Jaune: "What is coming, Adam?"

Adam: "The final war. The war to end all wars. There will be a reckoning. A thousand years of slavery and misery will be repaid... And humanity will be no more."

Jaune: "No... You can't mean that, Adam! Not all humans are evil! You can't judge them all and sentence them to death!"

Adam: "I am not the one who chooses this. But I am bound to her decision. Bound to her will."

Jaune: "Who is she?"

Adam: "You'll find out soon enough."

Jaune: "She can't... You can't just sell yourself over to her, Adam! You swore you'd never be a slave again!"

Adam: "... In the end, we are all slaves, Jaune."

Jaune: "That's bullshit! Adam... Please. You wanted to be a hero of justice!"

Adam: nods "I did... But there is no such thing as justice, Jaune. Only power, and who wields it."

Jaune: "Then why come here at all?! Have you come to kill me?"

Adam: "... No. I just... I wanted to say goodbye. I'm sorry... The next we meet, I will kill you. Or you will kill me. There is no in between."

Jaune: "... I won't kill you. I refuse to."

Adam: "... Then you will die."

Jaune: "Adam!"

Adam: "Good bye, Jaune. I'm sorry... But childhood must give way to the future."

Adam flees into the night.

Jaune: "ADAM!" He holds up his hand "Adam..." He lowers his hand, and bows his head in sorrow
 
Adam's Planning
Adam paced in his office. He considered everything from every angle, every permutation. He looked through all the intel they had on Jaune Arc. He hummed as he beheld his holo plot. He scratched his chin.

"Run simulation 224," he ordered the projector. The device complied, and holographic representations of Jaune and Blake appeared. Blake in a sailor fuku uniform favored by Menagerian prep schools, and Jaune in a suitable middle school uniform from Fuujin.

"Oh Adam, we are best friends, despite being human and Faunus," Adam muttered in Jaune's tone.

"I know," Adam said, "We are the truest of brothers. Our bond cannot be broken."

"Oh no!" Adam pitched his voice up to imitate Blake, "I love you both, Jaune and Adam! But my heart is set on Adam and liberating all Faunus kind!"

"My heart is broken, but I understand," Adam imitated Jaune, "My brother, please take care of her."

Adam nodded, bowing his head.

"Of course my brother..." He raised his head. "At least I was, until you betrayed me in the future!"

"You can't blame him for that, Adam!" Adam again imitated Blake's voice as best he could, "I have chosen my own path! It is destiny!"

"No," Adam cried, "It is not destiny! I shall break the wheel of fate and make my own choices!"

"I'm sorry my brother, but I must fight you to the death!" Adam said in Jaune's voice, "I too love her, and must take her from you!"

"Never!" Adam declared, "It is my regret that we must fight, brother. We could have been true friends. Forever... But I cannot forgive this."

Adam switched to his Jaune voice, sounding regretful.

"Standing here, I realize. You are just like me, trying to make history."

Adam nodded, his own voice full of sorrow.

"But who's to judge, the right from wrong. When our guard is down, I think we'll both agree... That violence breeds violence. But in the end..."

He switched to his Jaune voice and lifted up his sword.

"It has to be this way-!"

"LORD ADAM!" Trifa cried, as she burst in through the door. Adam immediately shut off the holograms and glared at Trifa.

"What?!"

"You wanted to know when preparations were complete for the plan, Lord Adam!" Trifa cried, terrified at Adam's rage. Adam growled.

"Knock! Knock on my door next time!"

"YES SIR!"

Adam paused and glared death at her.

"Did you see anything?"

"No sir! I didn't see you playing with your holograms again!" Trifa cried.

"GOOD!"
 
Councilman Arc: Debate
RWBY and the rest of JNPR were in the gallery over the main Council Hall, watching Jaune at work. He was at the podium, giving a speech on a bill.

Jaune: "... And as demonstrated on the holo, our military readiness has been drastically below historical norms, even accounting for the peaceful times we find ourselves in. Relying on Atlas and private Hunter Guilds is clearly not doing enough to deter bandit and Grimm activity in frontier settlements or even near major cities, and incursions by the White Fang and other rogue actors are increasing. Furthermore, our bases in Mistral have been getting by with second hand supplies in multiple instances, and our replacements for our frontline carriers are now three years behind schedule. Is this how we treat our fighting men and women? This anti-military sentiment may win votes but the reality is that the Valean Defense Force desperately needs more funding, and more respect. While I myself do hope to become a Huntsman in the future, I respect the fighting men and women who join the VDF to serve their country. They deserve better! Thank you, Madame Chairwoman."

Yang: "Huh... He's actually pretty good. He at least explained everything in an easy to follow way."

Weiss: "For you, clearly."

Yang: "Hey! I'm not the dumb blonde!"

Ruby: "No, just a traitorous one."

Yang: "What?! I said I was his girlfriend so he wouldn't get attacked by groupies, that's all! I'm just doing my job to protect him!"

Pyrrha: "Really?" Ominous smile "Don't you think you should have informed the rest of us before you did that?"

Yang: "What for?" Deadly smile "Seems like you had your shot and blew it, Cereal Girl."

Pyrrha: "Oh? Did I? Perhaps I can make my own luck with your misfortune."

Yang: "What kind of misfortune?"

Pyrrha: "Broken bones."

Yang: "Bring it on, Red! Maybe getting tended by Jaune in the hospital afterward would be worth it~!"

Weiss: "Would you two please stop?! Not here, have some decorum!"

Ruby: "Yeah!"

Nora: "Yeah! Whatever that is. Ooh! Look! The Puppy eating Lady is speaking!"

Blake: frowns deeply

Ruby: "Puppy eating lady?!"

Prunella Glocken takes the podium opposite Jaune, and smiles rather unpleasantly.

Prunella: "Thank you, Madame Chairwoman. While young Councilman Arc clearly has spirit, his inexperience is showing. Overall Grimm attacks have been falling in recent years, and our alliance with Atlas has ensured we don't need to spend nearly as much on our defense forces as in the past. Mister Arc may have grown up with tales of his Nana and Papa's heroic deeds in the Great War when Mantle and Mistral were our enemies, but that time is long past. Perhaps his love of battle, glory, and headlines with his delinquent girlfriend makes him imagine that fiscal and political realities don't matter. But they do. I hope the young Councilman will learn to temper his arguments with more wisdom going forth, and maybe keep his girlfriend in line. Thank you, Madame Chairwoman."

Yang: "What?! That bitch!"

Chairwoman Browning: "We will take a quick recess before final statements by both sides. Thank you."

Jaune headed off to his office, his bodyguards in tow. Nobody said anything until they were back in his office.

Yang: "Where does she get off mocking you like that?! I'd have punched her in her smug face!"

Weiss: "The nerve! She didn't even have a real argument, she just used ad hominen!"

Ruby: "Yeah! Ad what?"

Ren: "It means she insulted Jaune."

Ruby: "THE NERVE!"

Nora: "Want me to break her kneecaps, Jaune-Jaune?"

Jaune: sigh "No."

Nora: "Reeeeallly sure?"

Jaune: "Yes." He sits at his desk and rubs his eyes "I mean... I put a lot of work and effort into that presentation. But she just insults me, makes me look like a kid and she'll probably have the votes to beat down the bill."

Pyrrha: "Come on Jaune. You did a very good job. I think a number of Councillors were swayed. You laid out the facts and tried to appeal to their better natures!"

Blake: "Which seldom works in politics."

Ren: "Agreed. Most politicians are not like you, Jaune. They will be asking 'what's in it for me?'"

Jaune: "Hmmm... So, what's in it for Prunella Glocken to maintain things as they are now?"

Ren: nods "Yes."

Weiss: "Well, she does deal extensively with the SDC-I've seen her at many functions my father throws when he's doing business with Vale. So clearly, Atlas getting more defense contracts over Valean companies is in her interest."

Ruby: "That's despicable!"

Jaune: "But unfortunately, it's only rumors, not hard evidence-"

Blake hands over some documents. Jaune blinks and looks them over.

Jaune: "What the... These are emails where Prunella Glocken is communicating with how she'll get paid handsomely for suppressing the native Valean Defense industry?!"

Blake: "Yes. Sorry I couldn't get more but I believe this is enough."

Jaune: "Wha-Where did you get this stuff?!"

Blake: "Probably best not to ask such questions. Plausible deniability."

Ruby: "Blaaake! I thought we talked about you going all cat burglar!"

Blake: "Why do you think I got these documents by those means?"

Ruby: "So, can we send her to jail with this?"

Weiss: "No, that would require a lot more political capital than we have... We could blackmail her into voting our way."

Yang: "Seriously?"

Weiss: "What? That's politics!"

Jaune: "... No. No, I won't do that. Besides, if she demanded an investigation, that might get you in trouble, Blake. I'm not going to play by her rules and I'm not going to potentially sacrifice a friend."

Blake: smiles, pleased

Jaune: "I have a better idea."

One hour later, the Council reconvenes. Jaune takes his podium.

Jaune: "Madame Chairwoman, thank you. I would like for everyone to-"

Nora: "JAUNE-JAUNE!" She rushes up and holds up her Scroll "I HAVE WORDS THAT ARE IMPORTANT!"

Prunella: "What the-Why is one of your groupies disrupting proceedings, Mister Arc?"

Jaune: "Huh... If the Chairwoman would indulge me?"

Chairwoman Browning: raises an eyebrow "Perhaps a bit of indulgence is warranted for young Mister Arc."

Jaune: "I suggest everyone check their Scrolls and VNN."

They do so. Jaune helpfully projects it on the holo. Lisa Lavender smiled as she read the news.

Lisa: "-Once again, our top story: Councilwoman Prunella Glocken is implicated in a scheme to take bribes from the Atlasian Defense Industry to keep the Valean Defense Industry down. As these documents prove, and accompanying emails, the Councilwoman has been doing this for years and-"

Prunella Glocken, bright red in anger, glares at Jaune.

Prunella: "What kind of a smear campaign is this?! You arranged this-this fraud!"

Jaune: "Me? I've been here the whole time, check the security cameras. All my friend did was alert me to something I think everyone should know."

Prunella: "Of course you had something to do with this! The timing is too convenient!"

Jaune: shrugs "I think you have bigger problems than me, Councilwoman-"

Chairwoman Browning: "Enough. I believe we will adjourn for today. However, Councilwoman Glocken: Rest assured, we will be launching an investigation into these claims, as we would with any such news stories."

Browning hits the gavel on her podium, and she heads out. Prunella shoots Jaune a nasty look as she leaves with her caucus. Ozpin and Winchester come up to Jaune.

Ozpin: "A bit dramatic, Mister Arc."

Rufus Winchester: "And could have used better execution..." smirk "But well done."

Jaune: Poker faced "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Ozpin: chuckles "Of course. We'll have the vote on the defense bill tomorrow. I believe it will go better this time... But do try to be more discreet in the future."

Jaune leaves, meets his friends in his office... And sighs in relief.

Jaune: "Well... We got away with it. For now." He smiles at Blake "Thanks Blake. How can I repay you?"

Blake: "Well... I wouldn't mind if you took me out to dinner."

Yang: "Hey! I'm his girlfriend!"

Jaune: "Eh?"

Pyrrha: "I didn't hear him say that!"

Yang: "We might as well make it official since we've been on a date!"

Ruby: "It's not official!"

Pyrrha: "Exactly! Besides, I should be his-his pretend girlfriend! I'm his partner!"

Ruby: "I'm his best friend!"

Yang: "You're way too young! We don't need him getting associated with Repstein Island!"

Ruby: "I'M ONLY TWO YEARS YOUNGER!"

Weiss: "Honestly, you're acting like children. You should all calm down."

Jaune: "Uh, thanks Weiss?"

Weiss: "You're welcome. After all, I should pose as his girlfriend. I'm the most respectable."

Pyrrha: "Not by half you are!"

Jaune watches in disbelief as the five girls argue over him. He looks over to Ren and Nora, who are sitting on the couch.

Jaune: "Uh... You guys wanna jump in?"

Ren: "I'm straight."

Nora: "I love you Jaune but I'd only consider it if you brought Renny in, too!"

Jaune: "What?!"

Nora: "I have my limits!"
 
The Arc Clan: "Uncle" Kermit (Rough)
A very silly idea... And addition to the Arc Clan: An old friend of Nick Arc's. A famous showman, singer, and dancer... Kermit D. Frog.

Weiss: "Wait, how does a Paladin Hunter know one of the most famous showmen in history?!"

Kermit: "Ah, well... Nick and Isabel actually saved our bacon once during a Grimm attack! Quite literally, in Piggy's case."

Piggy: "And you haven't brought the bacon home yet, Kermie~!"

Kermit: "I keep telling you, Piggy, we're just friends."

Piggy: "Uh huh. That's not what you said last night~."

Kemit: "Ah, Piggy-"

Fozzie: "You might say Piggy a-boars you, ehhh? Ehhhh? Wakka wakka!"

Kermit: "Fozzie, please don't help-"

Fozzie: "You Lothario you, you swined and dined her! Ahhhh?"

Kermit: "Fozzie, enough-!"

Fozzie: "Honestly, with how often you pretend you two aren't together you might say you have... Ham-nesia? Ehhhhh? Wakka wakka-!"

Kermit: "Enough already, Fozzie!"

Piggy: "Honestly Kermie, why must you act so ashamed of me? Is there another woman in your life?"

Fozzie: "With you around, he doesn't have any more room! Ahhhh?"

Piggy: "HI-YAH!"

Fozzie goes flying.

Fozzie: "AAAAHHHHH!"

Weiss: "... Okay, now I can see it. They're just as weird as the rest of your relatives."

Jaune: "Weirder."
 
Statler and Waldorf Roast Team CMEN
Cinder: "And this is my plot for the Vytal Tournament! Any questions?"

Statler: "I'd call this a medium plan!"

Waldorf: "What's a medium plan?"

Statler: "It's not rare, and it's not well done!"

Waldorf and Statler: "DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Statler: "Boy that Cinder Fall is in a class of her own!"

Waldorf: "Sure is! Everyone graduated ahead of her!"

Waldorf and Statler: "DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Waldorf: "I gotta say, I think Emerald's barking up the wrong tree when it comes to Cinder."

Statler: "Really? I thought it was her performance was wooden!"

Waldorf: "Well let's face it, she's nowhere near as big a bitch as Cinder!"

Waldorf and Statler: "DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Statler: "You know, for an assassin named after the Greek God of speed, I'd thought Mercury would be quicker."

Waldorf: "On his feet?"

Statler: "On the uptake!"

Waldorf and Statler: "DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Waldorf: "Oh golly, I do love Neo. I always loved pantomime."

Statler: "You old fool! She's been talking this whole time, your hearing aid battery's out of juice!"

Waldorf: "What?"

Statler: "I said your hearing aid is out of juice!"

Waldorf: turns it up "Why, it's fully charged!"

Statler: "HA! Got ya, ya old coot! Every time you fall for it! Hahahaha!"

Waldorf: "Joke's on him! I was never watching her mouth!"
 
Statler and Waldorf Roast Team RWBY
"Hey, look at Little Red down there with that scythe! Thinks she's Death himself!"

"With how often she trips over that cape, there's only one thing she's likely to reap!"

"What's that?"

"Herself!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Check out the Ice Princess! Thinks she's a ballerina with fancy swordplay!"

Statler scoffed. "Ballerina? Her footwork's so stiff, she's more like a figurine in a music box!"

"There's one difference between her and a music box!"

"What's that?"

"I'd want to listen to the music box over her!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Oh, look at Blondie! She's got more firepower in her hair than her fists!"

Waldorf chuckled. "Yeah, but her punches hit like a wet noodle compared to her ego!"

"Her Semblance lets her take hits and get stronger!"

"Well given all the losses she's been catching, she should be invincible!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Hey, look! The Cat Girl's being quiet and not yammering on about prejudice and what have you!"

"I guess that proves how catty she truly is!"

"How?"

"She caught her own tongue!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"
 
Statler and Waldorf Roast Team JNPR
"So, how's our great-nephew Jaune doing?"

"Well, he's not much of a knight or a squire, despite how hard he works. Poor kid."

"I think I know which role would suit him best!"

"What's that?"

"Court jester!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Still, how about that Pyrrha Nikos? Beautiful, talented, amazing! Bet she practices that hair flip in the mirror!"

"So do I, but you never compliment me for it!"

"You old fool, you barely have any hair left!"

"Still more than you, ya old coot! Hahahahaha!"

"Still, that Pyrrha Nikos might make Beacon into a wonderful institution of higher learning and defending the people!"

"So totally different from what it's been up til now!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Wow! Thunder Thighs down there's got enough energy to power a Dust mine!"

"Yeah but her brain's running a 3 watt!"

"A 3 watt? That's not too bright!"

"Neither is she!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Look at Mr. Zen, all cool and collected! Bet he's meditating to ignore how boring he is!"

Statler grinned. "Boring? His fighting style's so plain, it makes white bread look spicy!"

"Still, he's got the perfect Semblance! He's invisible to Grimm."

"Heck, he's so dull he's invisible to everyone!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"
 
Statler and Waldorf Roast Team SSSN
Sun Wukong, tail swishing as he spun Ruyi Bang and Jingu Bang, flashed a grin at his team. Statler scoffed. "Monkey Boy thinks he's the star of the show! Bet he spends more time grooming that tail than training!"

"Ha! With how he chases after that Cat girl, he's not grooming! He's gooning!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Waldorf zeroed in on Scarlet next. "Check out the Redhead with the pirate act! Thinks he's a swashbuckler, but he's more like a deckhand!"

Statler smirked. "Deckhand? He'd get seasick in a kiddie pool!"

"Also, how is he able to fly?"

"His Semblance lets him as long as he's thinking happy thoughts!"

"With his team, I know how he's gonna end up."

"What?"

"Grounded!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Big Green down there looks like he could crush a Grimm with one hand! Too bad his strategy's as dull as his sword!"

Waldorf nodded. "Dull? He's so slow, the Grimm'll die of old age before he swings!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Blue Hair's got all the swagger, but he's too scared to use a Semblance that makes everything wet?

Statler laughed. "Well, that explains his love life!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"
 
The Arc Clan: "Uncle" Kermit (Rough) 2
May Zedong approaches Kermit.

May: "Hello Mister The Frog? Um, sir?"

Kermit: yells in shock "Oh my, I'm sorry, I didn't notice you there."

May: "I get that a lot."

Kermit: "What can I do for you? And please, just call me Kermit."

May: "Oh Kermit, I don't know how to be more confident. Can you help me?"

Kermit: "So you want to be more confident you say?"

May: "Ah! Y-yes! Um... I mean my job is to be very stealthy and hard to spot... But um... I'd like it if... Certain people would notice me."

Kermit: "Oh well, I'd be happy to help you be more confident. You just have to hold your head high, stand up straight and walk like nothing can stop you. But you know, if you want someone SPECIFIC to notice you, it might help to know who it is?"

May: "U-Ummmm... Uhhh... Y-You know... Ummm..."

Jaune: "Hey Uncle Kermit! Robin and are I going to the pool!"

Robin: "Yeah! They have a big whirlpool!"

Jaune: "Hey May!"

May: "H-H-Hey!" Blushing

Jaune: "Would you like to come to the pool with us?"

Kermit: Sees the signs "Say May, this right here would be a good exercise for you. Why don't you join Robin and Jaune down at the pool! You both don't mind do you?"

Jaune: "Of course not Uncle Kermit!"

Robin: "Yeah! She looks nice!"

May: "U-Um... Um... I-I just have my school swimsuit..."

Kermit: "Well that's fine May, it starts with just that. Go on, go have some fun at the pool!" gently nudges her towards Jaune

May: "O-Okay! Um, let me go change!" She runs off, blushing happily

Ruby: "Hey Robin! Hey Jaune! Hey Kermit!"

Kermit: "Oh hey there Ruby! What brings you here today?"

Jaune: "Hey Ruby!"

Robin: "Hey Ruby!"

Ruby: "We're all going to the pool, right?"

Jaune: "Well, we're waiting on May to show up."

Ruby: "Oh?"

Jaune: "Yeah, she's getting changed!"

May: "O-Okay! I'm ready!"

May shows up... In a traditional Japanese schoolgirl swimsuit... Which is a tad tight around her generous curves

Jaune: "Uh... I uh..."

May: "Sorry... I think it's the wrong size... Um..."

Ruby: "Oh... Geez..." Fumes

Jaune: "Umm... N-No! It's uh, it's great!"

Robin: "Really great! Can you carry me? I think the ride would be a lot more comfortable!"

May: "Oh, of course!"

Robin is held by May... And the little frog looks very smug

May: "Let's go to the pool!"

Jaune: "Yeah!"

Ruby: "Yeah... Hey Jaune? Carry me there?"

Jaune: "Sure."

May: "H-Hey...!"

Ruby: "You made your choice!"

Kermit: "Oh geez...I'm not the only green one here today...."
 
Cyber-Whitley AU: Winter Finds Out (DRAFT)
(DRAFT) Cyber-Whitley AU: Winter Finds Out (DRAFT)

Specialist Lieutenant Colonel Winter Schnee exited the strangely-shaped airship that had picked her up from a military skydock in Atlas and flown her to a base somewhere in eastern Rana Niejta.

Two men met her on the platform. "Specialist Schnee?" One of them asked as if they would not have shot her transport down if they had believed it was anybody but her.

She nodded along. The guard pulled something that wasn't quite a scroll, not with its full frame and the hazy red light that shone through its interior. He stared at her through it, looking up and down her body for a second. "Yup, she's clean, General"

"Right, come with us," the general nodded, shaking snow off of the scarf that he wrapped around his peaked cap and balaclava, and Winter had cursed herself for not wearing something at least little heavier than her ordinary mission wear. She could insulate herself with Aura, and the temperature wouldn't be a problem unless General Amzel held her out here on the platform for two hours, but that didn't seem to be a problem. Although part of her could not help but feel a small unreasonable pang of envy for the man.

It would not be long before Winter was off of the skydock and walking into a vast monstrosity of a base that was nestled into a jagged, trailing crest of the mountain range. This building, on one of the few mountains that hadn't turned up any ruins of religious significance in Rana Niejta was the headquarters of the 9th Division, named Jotun, was a complex evocative of the architecture that had informed Valean horror movies of the early-mid post-war period, and the books from the thirty or fifty years before that had inspired those movies, but crammed into the skybox of a video game console of the kind that was coming out when Winter was ten or thirteen. Transformers that looked like they were modified into movie props stood imperious, connected to spires that concealed observation and security equipment, as well as weapon emplacements by cables. Jotun itself was one of four smaller complexes strung out around the sort of valley or box canyon down the mountain on her left side that made up the whole complex, the infamous Bell Tower - a source of about a third of the army's folklore and smoke pit spook stories - or as it was properly known, Jotun-4, sat at the back of the valley, farthest from what was generously called a "footpath" that could theoretically access the canyon if someone somehow braved the climb, and was the only entry way not mediated by Jotun-1's system of cable cars.

"How much of your assignment did General Ironwood actually give you?" Amzel asked once they had gotten inside, taking off his scarf and balaclava, and revealing the crescent shaped scar that adorned his nose and right cheek, before warping around his eye below the brow, and the vermillion collar tabs of a general, with two repetitions of the golden pattern, unlike General Ironwood's four, as well as the curly shock of auburn-orange hair that sat at odds with the grey goatee on his chin.

"Not a lot sir, I was merely told that I was coming here to help you gather data on one of your projects." Winter replied. General Ironwood had sounded like he had wanted to tell her more, but he had made it very clear that even he did not know everything and General Amzel was keeping a lid on everything for the sake of "information security." Which was a new turn of phrase for the mad scientist, whose eyes, even now, glimmered with the spark of childish enthusiasm at the prospect of sharing his latest accomplishment.

They were checked over at a security terminal before they boarded the cable car. In a sort of tunnel with a hydraulic door at each end, Winter and the General had been stopped by a desk clerk in full body armor, situated in a sort of ticket booth apparatus made out of angled steel and reinforced glass, adjacent to a remote-controlled machine gun mounted into the ceiling. Apparently, they took security very seriously at the Jotun base.

Most installations did not have inward-facing defenses.

"Name, Rank, and orders, please." The desk clerk said as Winter dropped her signed orders into the receptacle drawer. "Winter Schnee, Specialist-Lieutenant Colonel, my assignment is to help generate data for the general." The clerk nodded after scanning over her papers back into the drawer, before closing it on his end, and letting her retrieve them.

General Amzel merely dropped a badge on a lanyard that he produced from his pocket into the drawer. The guard stuck it into some sort of reader machine. "Very good, sir," the guard replied as he returned the badge. Then he disappeared behind the partition in his pillbox-cubicle. A second later the light on the door that had blocked their path opened.

"Forgive me, Miss Schnee, unfortunately, you won't get to see the Bell Tower's interior during this assignment." The general said, not that Winter minded. Everybody had heard the stories of the Bell Tower and the Faunus experiments that melded black magic with mad science to turn the tide during the Great War or the Faunus Revolution (depending on who you asked) either in Atlas Academy or basic training, especially around Halloween. And unfortunately, Andres happened to know the version where the prisoners lived... or, lived on... anyway. Winter suppressed a shiver. Because he had decided to tell it during a survival exercise during Team WAFL's second year. Winter would be lying if she said she got any sleep that night. Or if she had spent her turn on watch scanning the snowbanks for Grimm advancing on their encampment.

"I don't really mind," she said.

"We will instead be going to Jotun-2." The General gestured her to the bank of cable car docks farthest to her left.

Winter stared at the man, flat-faced. "And what is the ghost story about that one, I wonder?"

"Oh, nothing," Amzel explained, "in fact we're tying to come up with a name for it now. The men wanted to pay tribute to the place our base has in Atlas military lore by having a write-in contest for and ominous names for the other Jotun installations. 'The Cauldron' seems to be a favorite for Jotun-3, so far. But we're having difficulties with Jotun-2. Mostly because too many people, I think, want to sell the madhouse angle, but can't make it work without trampling on the atmosphere and traditions that made the Bell Tower work so well in the first place."

The cable car ride itself was spent mostly in silence, and partly in an awkward attempt at Winter asking why that large arachnid walker was climbing up the wall of the ridge near what she believed to be Jotun-3. To which the general told her straight to her face, that there were no plans to replace all non-reserve Colossus walkers with a more current, "and certainly, a more soundly designed," model. There were also no feasibility studies being conducted on hexapedal platforms in the fifty-meter range, and that what she saw was probably just a crashed weather balloon.

It would have been a standard military issue denial, had he not muttered something under his breath about... Winter decided not to inquire, not with that omen of ill fortune in her peripheral vision, sticking up like a black lightning rod silhouetted against the snow. So Winter let the rest of the ride sink into awkward silence.

Count von BarnAuthor - Interactions too static, dialogue too wooden. Feels more like the entry to Stahl Arms Deep South in Killzone 3. No elements of gothic horror. Don't give enough description of surroundings but cannot do more to avoid getting bogged down - Solution = Sever into prequel & develop therefrom?

There was another checkpoint terminal like the first one waiting for them when they had gotten off. Winter would have made a joke about something taking over the bodies of anyone riding the cable cars, but quickly thought better of it. She probably would not like the answer.

After being led through the disorienting interior of a compound that could be described as looking like three gothic abbeys conjoined by covered bridges and flak towers, crowned by an attempt to build a power station with no blueprints, Winter was led to a modest conference room that looked more like a converted break room than anything else, if the refrigerator, sink, microwave, pantry, water cooler, and coffee machine arranged around the countertop at the back wall were anything to go by.

Six other people were in the room. Starting at the left were man with black hair and yellow-green eyes, and behind him another man, smaller, with darker skin, and bald, holding a briefcase and scanning the room back and forth. Then there was a woman sitting down at the table, and enjoying her lunch, a cheeseburger, if the wagging of her lupine tail was anything to go by. The Faunus traits were pronounced in her, because she also had a second pair ears that poked out from the braided bun arrangement that she had pulled her purple hair into.

That did it for the people in suits. The other three looked to be men in some sort of powered exoskeleton armor that evoked images of the protective gear worn by the Mantle's Hellhound units during the Great War, complete with the glowing red goggles, that had been mixed with modern industrial HAZMAT suits. They were carrying some sort of peculiar looking guns and crowding around the woman who occupied the table.

"Mghmmgh, Schnee's girl." The woman tried to address her mid bite. Winter's brow furrows. "This is who you specifically requested to test our project, Overseer?" She gestured to Winter with the half-eaten burger.

"In order to be sure that we have truly bridged the Aura Gap, we need a Specialist Officer with a record beyond reproach." The taller man in the suit explained in a Balto accent. "And a General's adjutant, to be sure." The smaller man said, his voice flat and neutral. But Winter had not been paying attention to that. Winter let herself get distracted by the Overseer's claim that the Aura Gap had finally been crossed.

The Aura Gap was a term of art in strategic analysis and the measurement of combat efficacy. It measured the capability gap that existed between those with Aura, and those without. And it was vast. Average soldiers couldn't walk off a tandem HEAT warhead, lift and throw tons of concrete, outrun conventional vehicles, or summon dozens of phantasmal Grimm to fight by their side. So, naturally, the Army wanted to figure out just how to bridge said gap. And apparently, the 9th Division, 35th Regiment, based out of the Jotun Complex had succeeded. Division and Regiment of what? Winter did not know, and it probably didn't matter. The names written on the document that she had been passing back and forth with those desk sergeants were more for an administrative cover than a physical cover. Winter oversaw a training exercise with the 35th. That's what the mission and personnel records will say. So, Winter must have done a training exercise with the 35th, certainly nothing groundbreaking.

"Now the problem is that your boss, and the Council, want proof. And simulations won't cut it." The woman started gesturing at Winter with the remains of the burger in her left hand, showing off the armband with the downward-pointing red triangle that had a cut across each of its edges just to the right of each corner, with a sort of white odachi driven through the left side. The logo of the Stark family, and conglomerate, Winter noted, that explained how she knew Jacques. One of the armored men passed the woman a remote as she finished her meal. She dimmed the lights in the conference room, and brought the large holoscreen that dominated the wall opposite the kitchenette to life.

"Infantry Cybernetic Exoframe, Model: Dragon, or the ICE Dragon, for short. To enter production via pending a successful field test phase, which we will hopefully begin if everything goes well today. I wish I could take credit for designing this but honor has always been the Stark family's forte, so credit for the design must go to General Amzel, I just helped build the fucking thing."

"You're too kind, Chairwoman." The general by Winter's side replied. "As she said, colonel, this is the ICE Dragon. A mechanical replacement body for soldiers wounded beyond the prowess of medical science. An intact brain is placed into the skull-housing where it will interface with the Dragon's main processor, the Apogee System. This processor and its subsystems mediate dataflows, sensory information, and synaptic transmissions because no organic brain can handle all of it alone."

The general was not exaggerating. HUD, night vision, thermal vision, enhanced vision and hearing, 120 meter range sonar, 1 kilometer range radar, a two-way radio with a 25 kilometer range, and much, much more.

"The Dragon can also share sensory and tracking data with up to five other units, enabling it to coordinate with AK-130s, Spider Drones, and, once they hit production, other Dragons." The general went on. "All of this is done through two sensory booms mounted on the sides of the head, and partially covered by the two AR visor panels that slide down over the Dragon's face. These panels enhance the ICE Dragon's visual and radar tracking capabilities and offer an extra layer of ballistic protection."

"It tops out at just over 110 kph in a flat-out sprint. Its standing jump length is roughly 19 meters, and it can clear six at the apex of said jump. The armor is composed of ceramics with an extra ablative layer, a layer of high density plastic reinforced with high-level ballistic glass all over a layer of foamed steel with a titanium backplate. It is equipped with a pseudo-synaptic system of fiberoptic cables and the musculature is composed entirely of CNT fibers. Each forearm has two pop-up hardpoints for concealable weapons. Each shoulder contains a further articulated hardpoint for a launcher mount for eight fifty-five millimeter missiles." The general rattled off his new weapon's capabilities like an ecstatic child.

"Did you have any limitations when designing this thing, sir?" Winter couldn't help but ask with a half-suppressed snort.

"Size and budget." Amzel responded. "But at 244 centimeters, I'm just under the height limit. I admit I'm a little over the empty weight limit, but..." The general trailed off.

"The limit doesn't matter, not now, anyway." The Overseer cut in. "Your assignment, colonel, is to render the Dragon combat ineffective before it depletes your Aura into the red.

"And we want real fucking data, so go all-out." Chairwoman Stark ordered with a sweep of her arm.

"Excellent. Now let's go meet the Warrant Officer." General Amzel said with a clap of his hands.

Chairwoman Stark vacated the table and sashayed out of the conference room, followed by her bodyguards, then the Overseer and his aide, then Winter, and General Amzel.

The group soon entered a variable training room, where the layout could be manipulated from the observation deck. When she was greeted by the cyan lighting grid in the mostly black room, Winter marveled again at just how normal the Jotun complex looked from the inside.

Count von BarnAuthor - Atmosphere not tense enough. Again, should probably use saved space from Section 1 removal to flesh out character interactions. Differing interests should be at play here. Also Amzel's insanity, Lowenhardt's duplicity, and Stark's flippancy, and powerlust tinged with madness, should all come out here.
- Leave Stark eating, the others probably wouldn't let her smoke.
- Lowenhardt dialogue fine, pacing and spacing fine. Re-evaluate to see if I am missing anything.
- Set Amzel off, or save it for later if Winter wins the fight?


The only oddity was the avalanche of armor and servos that was the so-called Warrant Officer, sitting on one of the blocks, next to what looked like a portable 25mm gatling gun with some sort of cannon or large bore launcher mounted on the outer side, and examining an ikakalaka, a broad sword with an angular, spatulated tip that created an armor-piercing pick on each side.

"Warrant Officer, your opponent." The Overseer said.

The Warrant Officer grabbed his gun by whatever grip was mounted behind the handguard and dropped down. Winter got a look at the whole rig as the Warrant Officer fell. About 150 centimeters in length, maybe. Probably a bit less, and with a large ammo box situated high toward the rear of the weapon, behind the side mount, but even absent that, the weapon would be massive.

"Greetings, Specialist Schnee." The Warrant Officer's modulated voice came from behind his closed AR visor. He pressed a button on the side of his blade's handle, and it began to transform. Servos in the heavy-looking sword unveiled themselves and folded pieces of steel over one another until the blade had shifted into a large pistol, one with a hexagonal barrel, a ported muzzle break that looked like it belonged on an anti-material rifle, and a breechblock that looked like a field howitzer's. Then the Warrant Officer's arm bent the wrong way at the elbow, before his wrist spun in the wrong direction, and he held the gun to his waist. As soon as the Warrant Officer let go, the gun slammed into his hip. A magnetic holster, Winter noted.

She wasn't impressed, and she was already picking apart his design for comparative weak spots that Edelweiss could likely cut through. His joints, obviously, had the same weaknesses that plate mail needed to make the suit maneuverable. But also his waist and strangely, his upper arms, looked comparatively thin. Winter began piecing together her plan of attack.

"Alright. You both know the rules. Each of you will proceed to the designated corners of the training room. The terrain will adjust. You will maneuver and engage your opponent. The exercise will stop when the first of two things happens. One. Winter Schnee's Aura falls to 15% or lower. Same as the Vytal Festival. Number two, the ICE Dragon is rendered combat ineffective. That means all of its weapons are removed or disabled. It cannot fight and it cannot run away. Now, Warrant Officer, your anti-capture countermeasures do not count as a weapon." The Overseer explained.

"I am insulted at the insinuation Doctor Lowenhardt." The Warrant Officer replied.

"Good, proceed to your corner and prepare to begin." The Overseer ordered, gesturing to a far corner in the training room.

Without a further word, the Warrant Officer lumbered and clanked away, and Winter began pacing back to her own corner. As she did she thought of another weakness. The EOD collar that protected the machine's neck was low enough in front to not clutter his face-mounted radar. If she could get in close and drive Edelweiss and Galanthus down into his core to disable him The main issues would be the Warrant Officer's strength, his pop-up weapons, and most critically, his reaction time.

The General claimed that he and the Chairwoman had built an opponent that did not have, or need, Aura. She would have dismissed it as inter-service boasting and puffery, in any other case. But, here, in the Jotun Complex, where, even if the stories about the Bell Tower were not true, the bounds of possibility were driven ever further into the outer darkness. And that machine had every alarm bell that her time at Atlas Academy installed into her screaming. Just who was the Warrant Officer? Someone who lost almost everything besides his brain, obviously. But there was a smoldering resentment that his modulated voice hadn't fully hidden. The man was bitter. And why not? He was a brain in a jar. Granted, his 'jar' was built to go toe-to-toe with Hunters without the benefit of Aura. But the fact that he had ended up inside of it in the first place probably wasn't anything to be happy about. Not that Winter intended to give him any pity

"Ten." The Overseer's voice came over the intercom. "Nine..." Winter saw half a dozen figures standing behind the reinforced glass before redirecting her attention at the hulk that was lowering itself into a crouch.

"Five..." The blocks began to raise, lower and shift, building the terrain of their battlefield. The Warrant Officer disappeared from view as a wall of blocks slid in between them.

"Three, two, one. Begin." The Overseer's voice was drowned out by the sounding of a klaxon. Holographic displays reading Winter's Aura popped up high on the wall. 'Damn.' Winter thought, 'he's got a stream of real-time intel on my status.'

Rationally, she understood that it was a necessary safety feature. And she supposed it evened out. He did not have any Aura at all.

Winter jumped onto the closest pillar of blocks she could find. Her goal was surveillance, trying to find her enemy's location. She succeeded before she had landed. The Warrant Officer was also airborne, and he had jumped for what was probably the highest pillar he could access. She noticed his rotary cannon starting to spin up, and before either of them had landed, she could already see the backblast behind one of the pop-up batteries of a missile launching.

Winter threw up a Glyph to catch the missile. It was a miniscule thing thrown in the missile's way to make it detonate early, in fact, the cost to her Aura did not even register on the meter. Not that Winter was paying attention. She was already diving back behind cover. Her finely tuned senses could hear that the gatling gun's spin had reached its crescendo. And she did not want to be exposed for what came next.

Although what came next was not what Winter had expected. Instead of the double-BRRRRRT of a gatling cannon firing and its rounds exploding. She got a strange BABABABABA followed, and then intermingled with a clanking, clattering cacophony that almost sounded like chimes. Then she felt a fistful of impacts on her side and looked down. A partially deformed metal balls were rolling down beside her thigh. And that was when it hit her. The Warrant Officer had not been carrying a rotary cannon. It was a gatling auto-shotgun. And even though Winter was concealed, the fire showed no signs of stopping. Why..?

The answer hit her with another nine millimeter pellet. The Warrant Officer's sensor arrays! He was using his advanced senses to triangulate her position, and trusting his gun's volume of fire to generate enough ricochets to whittle down her Aura.

Winter moved. She couldn't stay still, not like this. She made a mistake, letting her strange opponent pin her down. But she could correct the error. She summoned a score of small Nevermores, and sent them along their way away from the dying barrage. Most would attack the Warrant Officer's flanks directly. But some would... occupy his attention.

The wurrr of the gatling gun sped up again as Winter ran behind another pillar and vaulted it. As she had assumed, the Warrant Officer's next volley shredded the majority of her summons, but as he walked the onslaught toward her, the rest came in low and struck not the Warrant Officer, but the pillar beneath him. As his footing crumbled, the Warrant Officer vaulted toward Winter again. He had given up finesse and control it seemed, and intended to leverage his superior size.

Winter responded by bringing the battlefield into the third dimension, completely. She created a series of Glyph platforms to jump up to. His response was predictable, and betrayed inexperience, not with his body, but with combat.

He had tried to launch another missile. Just as Winter had wanted. A flick of Winter's wrist and another trio of Glyphs had formed outboard of the Warrant Officer's flank and they launched a volley of Ice shards into him. One caught the articulated mount and exploded all over it, encasing it in ice as the missile took off. The missile exploded in that same instant, causing every other warhead in the battery to cook off.

The Warrant Officer let out a mechanical screech in frustration and anger as he unholstered his pistol and drew a bead on Winter, his ability to bend every joint every way letting him acquire her with ease. The pistol going off demolished the Glyph beneath her, but the shot diverted into the ceiling.

Winter created two more Glyphs to land on. And a pair of beowolves dropped out from the bottom side of each. The first dropped on the Warrant Officer, yanking the remaining missile pod free of its mooring, and weighing down the limb that held that giant shotgun, not just delaying his attempt to bring it up, but forcing him to land off-balance.

The Warrant Officer responded by pivoting a full 360 degrees on the joint that connected his leg to his torso, throwing the Beowolf clear, and positioning his sidearm hand in line with a second. 'But his gun is unloaded, that anti-material pistol needs to be reloaded after each shot.' And not only that, but the gun was starting to transform. However, two blocks of metal, each about the length of a subcompact pistol, and a little wider, had extended on small scissor frames from the arm holding what was again becoming a blade. 'Oh right,' Winter thought, 'two concealed guns in each arm.'

The second Beowolf was chewed up by a burst of AP rounds. But even through the rapidity of the machine pistols' discharge, Winter knew very well the exact kind of bang that a 12.7x55 made when fired in a training room. She let herself drop again, this time landing on a pillar close to the cyborg's, where she began charging a time dilation Glyph, and loading the Dust chambers in her weapon. For Galanthus, it would be Gravity Dust, and Hardlight Dust in Edelweiss. It was probably a poor decision to engage the monster up close, but her Aura probably could not survive if he actually got a hit in on her with one of that shotgun's barrages, and she wasn't eager to find out what kind of surprise was in its side-mount.

However, if her plan succeeded, she would be sending General Amzel and Chairwoman Stark back to the drawing board in the next exchange. Or, hopefully not. The ICE Dragon had proven as frightening a foe as its name had suggested. This was a good project. Just not enough to let a rookie knock a member of the Special Security Unit on her ass.

He proved more than a match for the Beowolves, though. He spun around like a top again, shredding them and filling the room with a sort of high-pitched hum as he did. With the benefit of her dilated time, Winter could see his trick. he was spinning his limbs like drills, but also vibrating them at high speed. Grinding hits like that would shred right through her Aura. Her decision to turn this battle into a quick-draw contest, had become even riskier, but apparently, it was the right decision. Playing the attrition game with an opponent wearing that much armor was a grim prospect. And if he could shred Aura in melee...

It would have to be one more blitz.

There was no way he could keep pace with her. Not with time dilation.

Except, he was.

His face moved. He was tracking her. BANG. His shotgun fired. BANG. Again, he was using the recoil to steer the gun's muzzle toward her. BANG. With time dilation, Winter could string together coherent thoughts in between each blast of a shotgun with a rate of fire around 1300 RPM. 'One more blast and all six of those barrels will be right in my face. Damn. Going to have to use Edelweiss early.' Winter made a snap tactical decision and swung her saber. The position of her blade, held presenting the point, rather than the edge, plus the odd angle at which the cyborg had balanced himself on one limb meant that none of his limbs were actually in line with each other. But that gun had to go.

Winter flicked and twisted her wrist, a hardlight barrier formed as an extension of the blade as it twisted, first passing through the lower receiver and part of the barrel assembly of the Warrant Officer's gun, and then through the calf of the leg he was balancing on.

The Warrant officer let out another mechanical roar of a scream in frustration as his weapon came to pieces. But he did not wallow. He was already moving, rotating on his hip joint, as he fell, counterclockwise. The weapon in his other arm, the sword with the spatulated head, let out an even higher pitched scream, like an oscillating saw, as it came down. It was an HF weapon. Winter was perturbed for an instant. By both the sudden noise, and by just how many anti-Aura weapons that General Amzel had managed to pack into the ICE Dragon frame.

Winter dodged instinctively, and fortunately, she dodged to her right. Had she dodged to her left, the Warrant Officer could have chained into an attack with his other leg. From here, she had a clear shot at his neck. She drove Galanthus down, a black propulsion glyph at it's pommel to make sure that it went through the ICE Dragon's armor. Even with a Gravity Dust charge in the blade, she wasn't taking any chances.

Time began to readjust to normal as Winter focused her power into something else besides her time dilation. But she had hit her target. Galanthus was now embedded to he hilt in a spark-spitting wound between where the jugular vein and the vocal cords would be on a normal man.

Then the spinning sword slammed into her side, taking a massive bite out of her remaining Aura, and launching her into another block.

"How is this not enough to call the match?" Winter said as she scraped herself the block that she had just scraped herself off of, while using her outer hand to slam a new Dust Cartridge into Edelweiss.

The machine man staggered toward her, not seeming very hampered by its missing foot or the puncture in its neck that coughed sparks and spurted gouts of molten blue fluid.

"Both of us remain combat effective. I recall that our instruction was to continue until one of us was rendered combat ineffective." The machine responded. "Scans of your heart rate, sweat volume, internal temperature, and skeletal integrity indicate that you are merely fatigued."

Count von BarnAuthor - Everything is coming apart here. No satisfactory-yet-plausible way to end confrontation.
Where did I go wrong?
Fight too drawn out. Definitely. But what to do away with? Tracking each blow and connecting it to the next is clearly exhaustive. But a symphony needs every note. What and where?

Lack of conclusion that is both satisfactory and plausible. Introducing an OC - or at the very least a canon character made RADICALLY different - by having them throttle a canon character that is not just a mook, unless played for comedy, is a tricky proposition. Therefore Winter's triumph over the ICE Dragon is more easy to write in a satisfying way. Plus, the story of Winter overcoming the machine itself is more satisfying. However, the ICE Dragon, in its current form, is clearly too much for a single AA-level Hunter. Solution = use a prior iteration. Set this earlier in the trial timeline.
> Idea - This fight, Winter's combat data, is what makes the ICE Dragon what it is when it faces the Ace Ops. - Added bonus, this is embarrassing. Something for Whitley to be ashamed of, knowing that he owes Winter for being where, and what, he is.
>> This opens the door to reconciliation between Whitley and Winter? No, they would have to learn to think about one another first.
>>> This will require a re-write

Aftermath - to be written - possibly as a Part 3? Points to hit:
1) Winter defeats the ICE Dragon Alpha-Iteration. Only as she is withdrawing her blade from the limbless stump of machine torso, does Overseer Lowenhardt address Whitley by name.

2) Winter's initial reaction is shock and horror. Whitley's is apathy - he is primarily afraid of being seen as taking his loss immaturely so he actively disguises the emotion that he does feel. Which is primarily inward-facing frustration.

3) Abruptly, their conversation cuts, and Winter fears for the worst. She runs to the observation booth to get Whitley's developers.

4) Winter comes into the observation booth only to hear Whitley again. He is shouting at, mostly General Amzel and Chairwoman Stark for not making him good enough. Amzel criticizes Whitley's usage of the tools at his disposal - Possibly, this is what gives him the idea to include so many backup weapons. Stark berates Whitley for losing his balls because he saw Winter.
> Conclusion = Have Whitley rely entirely on Hagelsturm & Panzerfaust. Panzerstecher and the on-board weapons will come later along with the top-tier composite armor.

5) Overseer Kirk plays peacemaker, first by agreeing that the ICE Dragon's present armament is inadequate and ordering Amzel to design more weapons, and go nuts with the armor, announcing that as Overseer, he is formally increasing the project's weight limit from 300 to 700 kilos, and telling him that the next iteration of the frame will not be counted against the Project's budget. He then promises to reimburse Siarka personally to make whatever the General comes up with. Finally, he unites the General and Chairwoman by stating their task is to come up with a machine powerful enough not just to bridge the Aura Gap, but to do so no matter how encumbered it is by an inadequate user.

6) In the First moment of sisterly protectiveness that she has felt for Whitley in about eight years (they have not even spoken since she started at the Academy), Winter decides that she is going to have words with the Overseer, Galanthus is going to help too. Only for her to be intercepted by Adler, Lowenhardt's personal attorney. Adler states that Winter has accomplished her mission and is to return to Atlas for debrief. The general draws his Saw-Cleaver and makes it an order. Things look like they're about to pop off when Whitley asks Winter why she's so insistent on being by his side now when they have ostensibly not meant anything to each other for nearly a decade. This is what breaks Winter and causes her to run off. Much to the Overseer's amusement and Whitley's own confusion.

7) Ending uncertain. Winter most likely decides that she wants to reconcile with her brother, but is at a loss where to even begin.

8) Continuation also uncertain

All told, that would probably be another 3.4 - 4.9k word snippet in and of itself.

Well damn, 6k words already and it is not even complete. This ever-growing tumbleweed here is the explanation of my lack of recent posting. I wanted to write for my Cyborg-Whitley idea just how Winter found out that her brother had been blown up by the White Fang and used as the test pilot for a government program to restore wounded soldiers to action. Jacques wouldn't tell her, obviously, and Willow would have been too drunk to even leave her wing of the Schnee manor - so nothing unusual there. I could be wrong, and this whole series of interactions could be avoided if Ironwood just mentions that General Amzel is doing everything he can for her brother, and Winter finds out that way, which eliminates the need for the twist reveal. And possibly the whole altercation. Lowenhardt, you can guess who he's based off of, is a bastard. And he's just doing this to gauge the emotional responsive capacities of Winter and Whitley.

I think I know, mostly, what I am doing wrong but I do not want to destroy all of my progress (even if I admit it was in the wrong direction). So I figure the best way to make up to you guys is to give you a look under the hood at what a Count piece looks like under construction. And to promise that I am not giving up. I will probably come back to this piece when my muse isn't fighting me and making me feel tired for every word I type.

I wanted to introduce a lot of things here. The Jotun Complex - that's going to be coming out as an Original Concept: Do Steal soon, I assure you. Along with Amzel, Siarka, and Lowenhardt, who are the power players involved with this project.

So that is that.

Also, feel free to give me your thoughts and your input on any mistakes you think I missed or haven't sufficiently addressed.
 
The Arc Clan: "Uncle" Kermit (Rough) 3
Kermit: makes his terrified yelling sounds "JAUNE!!!! Help me!!! I had several guests lined up for tonight, and they all cancelled on me last minute! I need something!"

Jaune: "Ah, uncle Kermit, don't worry about it. You always made me laugh when I was a kid. The least I can do is help you out. Hey everyone, you all interested in performing for a variety show?"

Everyone: "YEAH!"

Fozzie: "Hey Jauney!!!! How about you join your favorite bear for some stand up! Waka Waka!"

Kermit: "Um, Fozzie, maybe not. After all I don't want to umm...strain your talent with two of you up there. Besides, maybe Jaune would like to play some guitar? I hear you've been practicing Jaune?"

Jaune: "Yes, a lot. But I'm better at dancing."

Weiss: "Ummm...maybe Jaune and I could do a dance number together? I could use my semblance in place of special effects if that helps..." tsundere blushing "Not that I'm interested in anything but dancing!"

Jaune: "Um, of course!"

Yang: "I'll handle it! I'm very good at dancing and numbers! Hey Stud-You plus me equals good times~!"

Weiss: "Hey there, I suggested it first, besides I'm way more graceful than you!!"

Yang: "Please! I'm a lot more fun to watch and dance with!"

Weiss: "I can put on something AWE-inspiring!"

Yang: "You can put on something that will bore everyone to death!'

Weiss: "Please, your performance would be so low-brow, it'd be hitting the floor!"

Ms. Piggie: "Ladies ladies!!! There's no reason to fight over Jauney boy here. We have plenty of time and I'm sure Kermie here can schedule two dance numbers, isnt' that right Kermie?"

Kermit: "Ah, sorry, but Pyrrha got ahead of you both and she's doing a dance number with Jaune."

Weiss & Yang: "WHAT!?"

Pyrrha: "Oh my... Sorry~." She was not sorry

Nora: "OH! OH! OH! OH! Can I do a magic show!!! please please please!!!!"

Kermit: "Well what can you do?"

Nora: "Rennie! The Electric Eels!"

Ren: "Here you are."

Ren: sighs as he wheels in an aquarium with two giant eels

Nora: reaches in, and grabs both eels "And she said...let there be LIGHT!!!!" *eels zap Nora, causing her to buzz, but also glow brightly.

Kermit: "... I'd love to book you Nora, but uh, Gonzo did that act last week."

Nora: sad puppy noises "But I worked so hard on that trick..."

Gonzo: "I know what we could add in! How about... Quoting the Declaration of Indepndence while doing that act on an electric motorbike?"

Nora: "Can I power the electric motorbike?!"

Ren: "Nora, no!"

Gonzo: "NORA, YES!"

Nora: "NORA, YES!"

Kermit: *sigh* "Not easy being green..."

Ren: "Tell me about it."
 
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The Truth about Adam Taurus According to Blake Belladonna, His Ex (Revised and Final)
In the cozy, slightly cluttered common room of Team RWBY's dorm at Beacon Academy, the air was thick with the kind of conversation that could only happen among friends who'd seen too much and questioned even more. Blake Belladonna sat cross-legged on the couch, her amber eyes distant, a shudder running through her as she clutched a mug of tea. Ruby, Weiss, and Yang leaned in, their expressions a mix of curiosity and apprehension, sensing a story that was bound to be… unusual.

"You know," Blake began, her voice low, "among the many other reasons I broke up with Adam… I saw his diary."

Weiss raised a delicate eyebrow, intrigued. "Oh?"

Blake nodded, her face contorting as if she'd tasted something foul. "Yes… It was…" She shuddered again, her ears flattening. "Horrendous. Twisted… Even by my standards!"

Yang's protective instincts kicked in, and she clapped her hands over Ruby's ears. "What? What did he want to do with you?"

Ruby squirmed, indignant. "HEY! I WANNA HEAR!"

"No!" Yang said, her voice firm but wavering. "Actually, maybe we shouldn't even get into this—"

Blake's voice dropped to a haunted whisper, ignoring the interruption. "He wanted… T-To love and respect and cherish me!"

Weiss, Yang, and Ruby froze, their faces blank. "…Wut?" they said in unison.

Blake nodded gravely, her eyes wide with horror. "He wanted me to be his… His equal! He wanted me to be his queen, and to be my knight!"

Weiss blinked, her voice flat. "…Huh?"

Blake shuddered again, clutching her mug tighter. "And… And to give me children! Lots of them! He had names picked out!"

Ruby tilted her head, confused. "Um… But he would, like… Make you a slave or something, right?"

"NO!" Blake said, her voice rising in dismay. "He wanted me to live by his side as I chose! And be…" She made a face, as if the word tasted like ash. "Monogamous! Married!"

Weiss's expression was deadpan, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "The horror."

"It gets worse!" Blake said, her voice trembling. "He would be tender, warm, loving… And vanilla! With long romantic walks on the beach!"

Yang's brow furrowed, her hands dropping from Ruby's ears. "Um… While he smacked you around for disobeying him or something, right?"

"NO!" Blake wailed, throwing her hands up. "He didn't have anything like that! Or spanking! Or whips or chains or anything like that! He wasn't even going to put a collar on me! He thought that would be…" She shuddered violently. "SEXIST!"

Ruby's confusion deepened, her silver eyes wide. "So… He wanted to basically make you happy?"

"UGH!" Blake groaned, slumping back. "He didn't listen to a single thing I wanted from him! Or read any of my erotica! I left it in our room! Open! And yet he never even knew I wanted him to pick them up and read them! Who does he think he is?! He should have treated me like his—his pet. Made me submit! But nooo, he just wanted to be 'happily married' and 'respectful of my feelings' and 'build a happy family with me.' What a jerk!"

Yang stared, her jaw slack, then shook her head. "…But he still wants to massacre all humans, right?"

"Oh, yes, absolutely he wants that!" Blake said, nodding vigorously. "But this just put me over the edge!"

Yang stood, her voice flat. "…I'm gonna go hang out with Nora. I need some sanity in my life." She turned and strode out, her boots echoing in the stunned silence.

Weiss, recovering, leaned forward, her voice cautious but curious. "…So he's single now?"

Ruby's eyes bugged out. "WEISS!"

"What?!" Weiss said, defensive, her cheeks pink. "We could work out the whole 'kill all humans' thing!"
 
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Whitley's Little Buddy
A fun idea: Whitley did manage to kill a Geist while doing some training with his Semblance. Nothing too strenuous, just enough to defend himself. And so he got the Geist as a summon, and he uses it to do all sorts of repairs on devices since he can have it possess objects.

Ruby: "So... You just have your little buddy do stuff?"

Whitley: "Yes. He can possess electronic devices which helps me trouble shoot them."

Ruby: "You... You think you could get into Crescent Rose?"

Whitley: "Ah... Are you sure?"

Ruby: "Y-yes... But be gentle?"

Whitley: blinks "Sure?"

Later...

Yang: "WHAT THE HELL AM I HEARING ABOUT YOU VIOLATING RUBY'S FLOWER?!"

Whitley: "NO! NONONO THAT'S NOT-THAT DIDN'T-RUBY HELP!"

Ruby: blush, holds her cheeks "Oh he was so thorough! So skilled! He did things with my Rose I've never even imagined before!"

Whitley: "STOP HELPING RUBY!"
 
Leadership Class (Revised, Full Fourth Chapter)
The leadership classroom at Beacon Academy was a battlefield of a different kind, strewn with stacks of forms and the groans of beleaguered students. Coco Adel, perched on the edge of a desk with her sunglasses glinting, handed out paperwork like a drill sergeant distributing rations… On account of the fact that Simin Megister and Headmaster Ozpin had both skipped class. Again.

"And here are the WR forms for each team's monthly budget for weapon cost and upkeep," she said, slapping a thick packet into Ruby Rose's hands. "And the APC forms for allotted ammunition expenditures for each team member, yourselves included."

Ruby slumped over her desk, her silver eyes dull with despair. "Kill me."

Coco didn't miss a beat, tossing another stack her way. "And here's the Iron Bonds form for travel expenses, plus risk assessment forms for each team member, and the health forms that must be filled out before every mission."

Ruby's head hit the desk with a thud. "Kill me with a hammer."

"Oh, and here are the HTD papers for Huntsmen taxation," Coco added, dropping four more packets. "One for each kingdom."

Ruby's voice was a hollow whisper. "Do it slowly. It's the only way to make me feel alive again."

Jaune Arc, sprawled in his chair, ran a hand through his messy blond hair, his voice a mix of exasperation and disbelief. "Oh god, why do we have to do this paperwork crap? Isn't there, like, an automatic filler or something that sorts all this for us?"

Coco smirked, adjusting her beret. "Nope. If we had that, it probably would've shot itself from all the crap it has to sort through ages ago."

Cardin Winchester, slouched nearby, muttered under his breath, "Well, isn't that a tempting thought…"

Ruby lifted her head just enough to glare at the ceiling. "Oh gods, this is not what I signed up for. I came to Beacon to be a Huntress and fight bad guys, not sort through endless waves of forms and documents!"

Coco's grin was sharp as a blade. "Welcome to the reality of being a Huntress, kid. Why do you think Miss Goodwitch is so angry all the time?"

Cardin blinked, his usual scowl softening into realization. "…That actually makes a lot of sense."

Jaune nodded, grimacing. "Yeah, it certainly explains things."

Ruby's voice dropped to a mournful whisper. "Maybe this is why Mum left."

Arslan Altan, seated with her usual calm, clasped her hands and leaned forward, her voice steady but encouraging. "Come now, everyone. Jaune! Do you not recall Caspian Chapter 3, verse 9?"

Jaune's tone was flat, his eyes glazed. "'Give to the King that is the King's, and give to the Father that which is the Father's.' I know, but geez, this is a lot even for hospital paperwork."

Arslan's smile was serene. "I'm sure if we all pull together, we will get it done."

A loud snore interrupted her. Sun Wukong, slouched in his chair, was fast asleep, a half-eaten banana dangling from his hand. Arslan's elbow shot out, jabbing him awake with a yelp. "Ah! What? Is it lunchtime yet?"

Cardin snorted, leaning back. "Arslan? Thanks. You're helping to make me less prejudiced against Faunus."

Arslan inclined her head. "Thank you, Cardin."

Cardin's smirk turned pointed as he glanced at Sun. "Sun? You're also helping me, because now I realize most Faunus are just idiots."

Sun grinned, unfazed, popping the rest of the banana into his mouth. "Am not! I'm just carefree and too cool for school!"

Ruby groaned, slamming her forehead against the desk again. "Nobody says that kind of junk but dorks and my dad!"

Jaune tilted his head, a small smile tugging at his lips. "I dunno, I kind of like it."

Ruby's glare was instant. "Point proven!"

Jaune flinched. "Hey!"

Cinder Fall, who had been quietly observing from the corner, spoke up, her voice smooth as silk. "It really isn't that much work, once you know how to do it."

Jaune's eyes narrowed, a sly grin creeping across his face. "You snuck in pre-done paperwork."

Cinder's composure cracked, her amber eyes widening as she flushed. "Wha—How—?!"

Cardin chuckled, his voice low. "Don't bullshit a bullshitter."

Jaune coughed.

Coco's grin turned predatory, her sunglasses glinting. "But we'll cheerfully keep it quiet if you share how you did it."

Arslan's brow furrowed, her tone stern. "You know that would be highly unethical."

Ruby turned to her, unleashing her infamous puppy-dog eyes, her voice pleading. "Arslan…"

Arslan held firm for a moment, then sighed, her resolve crumbling. "…However, it would be prudent. As long as we learn how to do it properly."

Coco laughed, clapping her hands. "Wow, flexible ethics on you, Nun Girl!"

Arslan's lips twitched, her voice dry. "Hardly. But one can't take everything in the Good Book literally, because it was made by mortal hands, and thus prone to flaw and failure."

Coco's eyebrows shot up. "That sounds like a very easy way to make loopholes that work for you."

"Yes," Arslan admitted, her smile faint but sharp. "Yes, it is."

Coco leaned back, smirking. "I should read more religious texts, huh?"

Arslan sighed, shaking her head.

Sun, now fully awake, leaned forward, his tail flicking. "So, what's your method, Cinder?"

Cinder hesitated, then shrugged, her voice cool but resigned. "…I had my team fill out all the paperwork beforehand and got copies of it from our Headmaster before we came. It's standard paperwork for Hunters, after all. Nothing nefarious about it."

Coco groaned, then burst into laughter. "Of course! That's what I've been doing!"

Cardin's jaw dropped, his voice rising. "Seriously?! And you didn't share?!"

Coco winked, her grin unrepentant. "You didn't ask~!"

Jaune groaned, slumping in his chair. "I hate you so much."

Cardin nodded, his scowl deepening. "So much."

Ruby's head hit the desk again, her voice muffled. "That won't work for my team! Not unless Roman Torchwick or the White Fang are threatening to blow up something if we don't get it done!"

Sun leaned back, popping another banana into his mouth with a carefree grin. "Eh, I find the best approach is to just leave the paperwork to the responsible members of my team! And not stress too much about it."

Ruby's glare could have melted steel. "…Cardin? I'm starting to think you were right about some Faunus."

Cardin smirked, leaning forward. "See? I'm judging based on character, not them being animals!"

Coco's grin turned wicked. "Or how much you love your honey bunny~."

Cardin's face went beet red, his voice a strangled shout. "SH-SHUT UP! I NEVER CALLED HER THAT!"

Jaune's smirk was gentle but teasing. "Aw, that's really sweet, Cardin."

Ruby giggled, her despair momentarily forgotten. "Super sweet~!"

Arslan's smile was warm, her voice sincere. "I'm so glad you two are getting along so well, Cardin. I'm truly happy for you."

Sun, munching on his banana, shrugged. "Eh, cat girls are hotter."

Cardin's glare was murderous. "I hate you all. So much…"

Cinder, watching the chaos unfold, let a faint, sinister smile curl her lips, her thoughts dark.

Destroying this place will be easier than I thought…

(Naturally written with some help from Titanmaster_117. Thank you again!)
 
Whiter Rose: What Remains
A much darker idea: A discussion on my Discord was thinking about a Future!Weiss or Winter coming back in time, and among their Summons was a Rusted Knight!Jaune. How much of their soul would be left is a big question: If it would just be a mindless construct, or if some part of their consciousness would remain.

Well! Rather than another tired White Rose take on it (Seriously, that pairing would be nearly as bad as Bumblebee)... Have a Future!Whitley come back... With a Ruby summon.

This Whitley is older, battle worn, the sole survivor of a terrible future. All he has left... Is the summon of the woman he loved. A woman... Who asked him to kill her.

Ruby: "Use my power... It's the only way you can save everyone..."

Whitley stood over the dying woman... The light of his life... Tears running down his cheek as she lay in a pool of her own blood. He shakily held up his sword.

Ruby: Small smile "Whitley... I'll always be there with you..."

Whitley: "... I... I love..." He can't speak

Ruby: "... It's okay... I know... I love you too... Please, Whitley."

He bows his head to try and hide his tears... And he thrusts into her heart.

He shudders, feeling the Aura and his Semblance react. He stands up, and burns the body with a blast of Fire Dust. He would not let anyone take her body for a trophy.

Grimm Griffins land around them, snarling. Whitley turned around, his face shadowed. He summons a Glyph... And a ghostly Ruby appears, swinging her scythe, her Silver Eyes glowing.

Whitley: "... There's one significant difference between her and me... She was the nice one. I'm not."

They charged into battle.
 
ICE Dragon AU Notes
Count should probably explain what the ICE Dragon project is. Because the the ICE Dragon unit is key to understanding my Cyber Whitley concept, the AU, and all of the characters and places that I may introduce.

My principal sources of inspiration (pronounced: the shit that I am ripping off and tossing into a blender) here are Cyberpunk and Metal Gear, but there will be secondary references to Killzone, Halo, Helldivers, and maybe Ace Combat.

To recap, Cyber-Whitley is Count's attempt at exploring a Whitley that is forced to get his hands dirty. A White Fang rocket attack on a Schnee limousine leaves Whitley as little more than burnt burger meat. Jacques (pronounced: Jack-Ass) Schnee decides that he doesn't feel like paying for his son's prosthetics. This takes place around White Trailer (so on Weiss' farewell tour) so she's still the front runner for company heir. Jacques makes some very unguarded remarks about what will happen to the army's Dust supply if they don't eat the cost. (The reason that the Security Directorate doesn't beat the shit out of him is that the Council could always use an excuse to hamstring Ironwood, and Jacques' recklessness - though catalogued for later - will not be acted upon, and somebody very high up runs interference for him.)

To that end, the 3% of Whitley's body that isn't charcoal is given into the care of Lieutenant General Henryk Amzel, commander of the Advanced Project Research Army Division, or APRAD, currently designated as the 9th Division for administrative purposes.

Amzel - being an Edward Richtofen expy - is a deranged maniac who seems to be a whole bunch of stereotypes about Solitan scientists rolled into one. He's a Lieutenant General, and somehow he has his medical doctorate (he actually used to serve as a medical officer in the airborne troops before transferring to the R&D Corps to escape a scandal), as well as doctorates, in electrical engineering and physics. His weapon of choice is a heavy, thick folding saw-toothed cleaver that in his hand looks more like a tool to reprimand his test subjects than a weapon to kill things that fight back - although he is surprisingly able to do both. Of course, even his knowledge has its gaps. To that end, the Chairwoman of a company considered reliable enough by the state was brought in, in the way that military contractor companies and their designers are. Siarka Stark, Chairwoman and Chief Designer of Stark Arms, has been brought on and told to make Amzel's vision happen. She's the pragmatist to Amzel's visionary, and the reason why the ICE Dragon system is so rugged and durable. She's also willing to go along with Amzel from time to time, being a bit of a mad scientist herself. Not nearly to Amzel's extent, but all of the traits are there. Her philosophy on design is best shown in her products, such as the SkA-52. A high capacity, compact, high rate of fire, modular, multi-caliber rifle that continues to perform reliably whether the atmosphere is choked with spores, ash, sand, or snow.

Where Amzel wants to replace the ICE Dragon's MCFC reactor core with one that runs on heat captured by the decay of ultra-heavy metals (which if mixed with Gravity Dust, Amzel believes would generate the means for the people of Remnant to alter the fabric of reality, thankfully, few people take his ravings too seriously on this subject), Siarka is more the type to talk him into equipping the Dragon with novel systems and his own spin on technologies already emerging.

The representative of the State is the Overseer, Kirk Lowenhardt, a computer scientist given override authority to make sure that Amzel isn't overspending and Stark is not overbilling. However, if Lowenhardt likes to run roughshod over any project that he is given command of and he has an uncanny skill for turning people against each other. He'll get a floundering project to meet its goals, usually on time. But his idea of testing often leaves everybody else involved wanting to kill each other, and him. He's not one of Salem's but you would be forgiven for thinking he was.

Now that we have the players, we can get to the project itself.

The Infantry Cybernetic Exoframe has gone through a few models and iterations thus far, and multiple iterations have already grown out of it. Starting from the base ICE Dragon unit, the ICE Dragon alpha. Image for reference. It is easier to show what I am driving at than to write a whole paragraph or three describing it.

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It would look something like this. I'd change the color scheme to something more Atlas Army standard of course, But you've got everything you need. Except the jaw would be distinctly less human, it serves as the housing for the radar. The visor is not two panels like MGR Raiden or what Whitley's visor will be upgraded to in subsequent iterations. Instead, a second set of eyes with compound cameras swing over the eyes in his skull, the modules synchronize, and Whitley goes from merely seeing in higher resolution, for greater distances, and so on, to getting the AR live feed that lets him see in visible light, infrared, thermal, and everything else all at once. The color-distorted face plate in this iteration is more a ballistic shield for his sensitive bits than evertything else, but it is darkly tinted enough that you can't pick out his features looking at him straight on. I didn't include any hair on mine because I was unsure of how that would effect the skull housing mounted sonar array.

Developed concurrently was a smaller, more discreet, lower profile body intended for day-to-day use. This body contains many of the sensory packages of the larger models, and similar speed, but inferior strength (as only so many CNT fiber muscles can be fit into a Whitley-sized body) and far less armor (because he's 5'3" and not 8'1"). In fact, the only tip-offs in this form come from metal detectors, the internal lighting of his eyes, and the fact that even in this body, he weighs about 130 kilos. Basically, he's like 9S wearing a white uniform instead of a black one. Interestingly, Whitley Schnee and 9S are the same height. Although I think in this body, Ruby would definitely be more into it if he went with a more 9S hairstyle.

The ICE Dragon beta, developed from the ICE Dragon alpha's failure in test runs against an actual Specialist Officer. Here's the eight foot tall abomination that I depict Winter as fighting in my snippet, but now I realize I want to be Amzel and Siarka's answer to Whitley's loss.


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This is a turnaround of Adam Smasher in Cyberpunk 2077, seen here wearing his custom IEC Dragoon frame. The Dragoon is where I got the Dragon's name, specs, and most of its abilities and on board weapons. I basically added an extra missile pod, swapped Adam's dual .50 BMG pop-up auto-pistols (which he can replace with a pair of AGLs on the tabletop) in his wrists for 12.7x55s in Whitley's, (but don't worry, I have a post-Vytal Festival upgrade idea). Kept the sensory booms that stick out of the sides of the head on the factory-issue Dragoons, (because Blake raging at Whitley for racism or cultural appropriation or some similar contrived horseshit because he's got two antennae sticking out of his head sounded funny to me), and added an MGR Raiden ballistic visor.

By the time the beta version rolled out, Amzel and Stark had scrapped the eyes-with-layover design completely, and just put the high power compound optic into Cyber-Whitley's skull casing directly.

There's a picture floating around of how to differentiate the Schnees by appearance, Winter with Black hair, Whitley with his father's eyes and jaw, Weiss looking like a carbon copy of her mother... I imagine seeing Whitley, eight feet tall though he is, with only the features that he inherited from his mother, even if it is artificial skin over armor, would give Weiss and Winter quite a start.

The only other aspect of note is my ICE Dragon's High Mobility Feet. They're like Raiden's high heel-looking configuration, with a pair of retractable spikes (such as on Metal Gear Rex) sticking out from the shins at both sides of the foot. This enables the ICE Dragon to functionally have the knockdown resistance of Elm's Semblance without the downsides, and if not run up sheer ice/rock walls, then walk up them at a good speed with his weapons free.

Editor von BarnOwl here, another thing about the High Mobility Feet and another reason why I specifically went with Raiden's high heel thing, is so Whitley can wield his weapons with his feet, much like Raiden.

So, onto the weapons themselves.

As Cyber Whitley is basically 70% Adam Smasher and 30% Raiden when he isn't in his 9S frame, his primary weapons is basically all of Adam's Cyberpunk 2020 weapons put together into one mechashift abomination. This is Hagelsturm - German for Hailstorm.

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Behold the Tsunami Arms Helix, a gatling auto-shotgun with a fire rate comparable to an MG42. However, that's not Adam's only shotgun, and it is only a 10-gauger. He has a 4-gauge shotgun that can mount a heat ray, AGL, flamethrower, or rocket launcher like a rifle mounts a grenade launcher. I just sort of ran with this concept and bulked up Hagelsturm to 4 gauge and gave it an outboard facing side mount in my head, like Scorch's GL, but on the right side, as opposed to the left.

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As for what it transforms into, a rocket hammer. Like the Grav Hammer in Halo, like the rocket hammer in Alita, like Adam's hyper hammer that I do not think he has in 2077, and like Elm's too I think. But I went and made Whitley's unique. Because I have not forgotten about Metal Gear, and because there are probably a lot of moving parts in the motor that drives the spinning shotgun, this is the head that I came up with. The spinning, grinding effect, I think probably chews through Aura.

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His sidearm, Panzerstecher - German for Armor Piercer, is an Ikakalaka designed not dissimilarly to the Youtuber Skallagrim's functional Ikakalaka. Which is just Armor Slayer from Fire Emblem. But because Metal Gear cyborg, and cyborgs generally, it is also an HF sword.

Video link should be here

And it transforms into an anti-material pistol like this

Thunder_50.jpg

At 16.9 inches/ 43 cm long and 5.44 kilos, it is a big boy. Which is fitting, because you need a lot of mass not just to manage recoil (which isn't much of a problem for machines) to get all of the metal that can get up to the size, and hold up to the high frequency oscillations of its sword form. Chambered in the Atlas equivalent of 50 BMG, initially, but because Whiter Rose is a thing, Whitley will be designing a personal, and absolutely massive cartridge to wow Ruby by the time she sees him again in the Atlas Arc (I settled on a 230 to 240 gram 17.8x115, so muzzle energy comparable to a 25x137 or a 30x173 AP round depending on what velocity I settle on. The gun itself will be properly elongated so its sword-form is a proper two-hander, and I will sci-fi my way to a muzzle velocity). He's got the body of a killing machine but the brain of a teenager, and he's lucky that Ruby's idea of either the perfect boyfriend, or male beauty standards, or both, probably does specifically call for multiple large caliber pop-out weapons.

One last thing. One of the many benefits of being a cyborg is that you can rotate and vibrate every joint at high speed. In Battle Angel Alita this gave us Panzer Kunst (German: Armored Arts) which went on to inspire Cyberpunk's Panzerfaust (Armor Fist). And they work the same way. You need to be a fullborg to do it. You spin to build momentum while simultaneously vibrating to channel vibrations and ignore armor (and in Whitley's case, deplete Aura).




One last thing. The final development of the project, the one I haven't touched on yet, because this is just a half-formed idea.

Now with what has already been set out, what with what has been written here with the likes of General Hardy, the 1k society, the planned war with Menagerie and possibly other places, and Remnant plunging back into conflict, I wondered, how would Amzel and Siarka future-proof their program. Simple. Build a plug-in.

In Cyberpunk there are things called ACPAs - Assisted Combat Personal Armor, or simply power armor. It is a bigger mech (3-5 meters, think kind of like a Knightmare Frame in Code Geass) that you have a character pilot. One of which is the DaiOni, which because of its wiring, lack of life support, and ultra-intense sensory package and everything else, can only be piloted by a fullborg.

So I've kind of come up with the ICE Dragon APC (Amphibious Powered Cavalry) Unit.

You plug an ICE Dragon (either Whitley in the prototype/test bed, or some other very wounded Atlas soldier that has undergone full conversion once the ICE Dragon - Serial hits full production) into a larger walker (maybe a 4 meter class, maybe a 20 meter class), and send him on his merry way. I'm imagining a sort of squadron of heavily armed walkers purpose-built to kill Hunters-level opponents and things like themselves acting as the spearhead of Atlas' military interventions.

I hope this sheds a little light on the vision that I saw in the absolute trainwreck previous, and sets up so I can kind of start cranking out more with this idea.
 
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Adam's Secret
Got this fun little bit stuck in my head.


Adam: any last words before I kill you?

Yang: why are your horns black?

Adam:....what?

Yang: why are they black? I mean bull horns are usually bone colored right? And even if they did have some black it wouldn't be completely solid like that.

Adam:....

Yang: oh my God do you paint your horns?

Adam: No!

Yang: you totally do!

Adam: shut up!

Yang: but why? I mean the sheer amount of nail polish and time that has to take.

Adam: the white didn't fit my color scheme.

Yang: oh but the Grimm mask is ok.

Adam:....

*Cuts yangs arm off*
 
Team AARN in the Field
Team AARN is best described as... Well... They had Team 7 Wave Country Mission Syndrome. STRQ had it to a point as well (They're the parents of the protagonists after all) but Team AARN's tended to get much more chaotic.

Ozpin: "So... Your mission was to rescue a lost boy from a village..."

Isabel: "And it turned into a battle for the fate of the valley when the local warlord found a Pre-Moonshatter device that turned him into a raging Grimm monster."

Ozpin's assistant, a Miss Cellaneous, is staring in disbelief.

Nick: "I cut him in half when the local priestess let us transfer Saia's energy blast into my sword with her Semblance!"

Arjun: "Yes, but my arrow strikes opened up the hole for you to hit him."

Isabel: "That wouldn't have happened at all without my expert leadership!" A pause. "Also the ancient temple of doom was destroyed, which is a real shame."

Nick: "Yeah, uh, I kind of cut it in half."

Isabel: "Sooo... What is our next mission?"

Cellaneous: "... You're going to guard some bridge builders. Just a nice, easy escort mission."

Isabel: "Good! We could use a break!"

And later...

Isabel: "Sooo... The mercenary group ISIS tried to summon a Super-Grimm to unleash upon South Vale but we managed to kill it."

Nick: "There was a prophecy about it and everything!" grins

Arjun: "Yes, which I clearly fulfilled."

Nick: "Nuh uh! I was clearly the one!"

Arjun: "No! I was!"

Saia: "Technically any of us could have fit the role, but we only defeated it with the power of friendship!"

Isabel: "Also hitting it really, really hard."

Saia: "That too!"

Ozpin: "... I see." sips his coffee "Well! Good job!"

Cellaneous: frazzled "O-Okay! Okay! Here's... A very simple mission! You just deliver this package to Count Testoasa in Hispania! He's a respected noble! Absolutely nothing strange or death defying!"

Isabel: "Good! Honestly, all these missions are just crazy!"

Nick: "I thought they were fun!"

Isabel: "You would, idiot..."

They leave. Cellaneous looks over at Ozpin.

Cellaneous: "I-I'm sure this is just a bit of bad luck... Right?"

Ozpin: "Of course! Third time's the charm!"

Some more time later...

Cellaneous: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DESTROYED THE COUNT"S CASTLE AND KILLED HIM?!"

Isabel: "He had addicted his people to drugs and was threatening to kill them all if I didn't marry him and help him make better drugs!"

Nick: "Yeah! Also we cut his castle in half... Again."

Arjun: "Only after I blew up the foundation."

Nick: "Saia didn't need that to cut it in half! Though I did help her by swinging her like a sword!"

Saia: "D-Don't remind me, I'm still woozy."

Arjun: "Yes, about that... Did he touch you inappropriately?"

Saia: "My Prince, of course not!"

Nick: "How could you say that?! I only want to touch Izzy inappropriately!"

Isabel: "IDIOT!" Bonks Nick on the head, blushing

Nick: "OW! That's what you said!"

Ozpin: "Hm... Perhaps I should have named your team ARSN-Arson."

Nick: "That's not a color though!"

Ozpin: "Good point. Well... You did stop the drug trade and freed the city so I'm going to call this mission a success. Now, for your next assignment-"

Cellaneous: "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

Miss Celleneaous took an early retirement after this.
 
The Arc Clan: Great-Great Aunt Morgan 2 (Rough)
Pyrrha was doing some training on her own in the training field, contemplating things... Mainly Jaune...

Morgan: "Ooooh... You want to make babies with Jaunnne~... You want to convince him to become my Dark Knight, oooohhh~!'

Pyrrha: "Um... Sorry, but that's not very convincing."

Morgan emerges from a bush with a scowl.

Morgan: "Come on! I could push him to go out with you, you know~!"

Pyrrha: bright red "St-Still no! Besides... My aunt's been pushing on that too!"

Morgan: "Uh huh, and has anything happened?"

Pyrrha: frustrated noise "... He is pretending nothing has happened. Given he has to sell the illusion that he's engaged to multiple girls, I understand that..."

Morgan: "But you want to change that, don't you~?"

Pyrrha: "W-Well..."

Morgan: "Come now... There's no need to hide it. You want my stupid great-nephew all to yourself, don't you?"

Pyrrha: "I-I, um... W-Well... Maybe..."

Morgan: "Yessss... Come on! I can make all your dreams come true~!"

Pyrrha: "I mean... You'd be more convincing if I didn't know you were single and had an OnlyFans-"

Morgan: "I'M GOING THROUGH A ROUGH SPOT!"

Pyrrha: "Also the rest of your family doesn't like you."

Morgan: "Artoria was always like that! Taking things that are mine, like my toys or my music tapes or my throne!"

Pyrrha: "Would you even be a good monarch?"

Morgan: "Being good at ruling isn't important! What's important is being able to have a harem of hot hunks and to get cake whenever you want! That's what being a Queen is all about!"

Pyrrha: "I-I don't need a harem!"

Morgan: "Okay, so let Jaune have the harem and you be first wife!"

Pyrrha: bright red "W-Well... Um..."

Morgan: "WHILE YOU HELP ME TAKE OVER THE WORLD!"

Pyrrha: Long pause "NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT!"

Morgan: "Come onnnn! Haven't you ever wanted to be the bad girl? The naughty girl?"

Pyrrha: "ONLY FOR JAUNE!"
 
The Arc Clan: Great-Great Aunt Morgan's Travails (Rough)
With Isabel...

Morgan: "Help me take over the world!"

Isabel: sigh "Same answer as last time, Great-Auntie: No. Maybe if you just made up with your husband-"

Morgan: "NO!"

Isabel: "Will you just think about the consequences of your actions?!"

Morgan: "NEVER!"

With Nick...

Morgan: "Be my Black Knight, and together we will rule the world!"

Nick: "Nah. Izzy would get mad."

Morgan: "Wha-Don't you have any greater ambitions than being a husband and father?!"

Nick: "What greater things to be are there than that?"

Morgan: "Being a great warrior?!"

Nick: "I already am! Boy, you're really bad at convincing people to work for you! I guess that's why Nana was the Queen and you weren't, hahaha!"

Morgan: "... How did the idiot destroy me so utterly...?!"

With Tangy...

Morgan: "Tangy... Dear... Don't you want to help Auntie take over the world?"

Tangy: "I want to be rich and prosperous, ruling the world is for suckers."

Morgan: "Why not seize things to make yourself rich?"

Tangy: rolls her eyes "That's the economics of a mentally retarded child, Auntie. Even communists don't believe in their economics, they just want to seize power and wealth while being praised for it."

Morgan: "What's communism?"

Tangy: "Another reason you shouldn't be ruling anything."

Morgan: "ARGH!"
 
Never Do Docking Again!
Also... I'm imagining Penny, Ruby and Nora at some point wanting to do this combo move:


View: https://youtu.be/yoZrvhOXDcs

With Ren and Jaune as the legs.

Penny: "YES! TOGETHER WE ARE THE COMBINED SUPER FIGHTING ROBOT... BIG EMPRESS!"

Nora: "AH! PENNY! ARM LEFT HASN'T DOCKED YET!"

Penny: "WHAT?!"

Ruby: As Penny's Right arm, holding onto her arm tightly with arms and legs while holding Crescent Rose "Quickly! Pyrrha! Join us!"

Nora: "Yes, join us!"

Jaune and Ren are holding Penny up and looking deeply embarrassed.

Pyrrha: "... No."

Ruby, Nora and Penny: "..."

Pyrrha: "It's disgraceful to my pride as a human being."

Ruby, Nora and Penny: "DISGRACEFUL?!"

Pyrrha: "It's disgraceful to my pride as a human being."

Ruby, Nora and Penny: "SHE SAID IT AGAIN!"

Jaune: sighs in relief

Ren: Same
 
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Jaune Arc, Single Father 12
I did have the thought of any of the Huntresses going full Yor over Mia in the Jaune Arc, Single Father timeline.


View: https://youtu.be/lAnKmZRxfyY

Though Pyrrha, Ruby and Weiss are the most likely to make such a mistake.

Pyrrha: "HOW DARE YOU KIDNAP MIA, YOU PERVERT! SHE'S TOO YOUNG FOR MARRIAGE!"

Jaune: "They're trying to marry her off?!"

White Fang: "N-NO! WE JUST KIDNAPPED HER BECAUSE-!"

Weiss: "Blake? Do you know any methods of torture for a creepy perverted pedophile trying to sell sweetie little Mia into sex slavery?"

Blake: blazing eyes "Several."

White Fang: "N-NO, WE WEREN'T-!"

Yang: grins and slams her fists together "Let's go through them in alphabetical order."

Nora: "I call his balls! That'll be 'B'!"

Ren: "No, you save those for last."

Ruby: sadistic grin "We can just cut off one to start!"

White Fang: THESE PEOPLE ARE CRAZY!
 
The Arc Clan: Uncle Trey 2
Long overdue...

- - -

RWBY and _NPR were waiting in the kitchenette for Jaune to show up with dinner.

Yang: "Ya know, he'd be the perfect househusband. He's hot, he cleans up, he cooks, cleans, he's responsible..."

Pyrrha: sighs happily "Yes... Ah! I-I mean no! And how dare you reduce him to-to some fetish object!"

Yang: blush, grin "I'm doing better at it than you are, Cereal Girl~. At least I've actually gotten somewhere with him!"

Pyrrha: "Y-You... You tramp!"

Yang: "Milquetoast!"

Weiss: "You realize you're fighting over ARC, right?! Arc?! The idiot?! The deadlast?!"

Pyrrha and Yang: "WHO ASKED YOU, TSUNDERE?!"

Weiss: "I'M NOT TSUNDERE!"

Blake: "You know, he is my fiance as well."

Yang: "Fake fiance!"

Blake: "So are you!"

Ren: sighs "Things were quieter before Jaune's love life got complicated."

Nora: "No they weren't!"

Ren: "... Good point."

Jaune emerges, carrying lots of plates with Trey following with more platters.

Jaune: "Hey guys! My Uncle Trey stopped by to help me make dinner!"

Trey: "Hey all! Hope you're ready to enjoy, ladies!"

Yang: "Oh... Wow... So growing up hot just runs in Jaune's family, huh?"

Weiss: bright red "O-Oh my... Uh... N-Nice to meet you, Mister Arc!"

Trey: "You as well, mademoiselle. Now, Jaune?"

Jaune: "Right!"

He expertly set down every plate and drink, and bowed.

Jaune: "I only wish to serve you, my dear friends and divine ladies, so that your beauty may grow everyday, along with your happiness."

He lifted his head and smiled, practically shining. He then looks over at Uncle Trey and scowls.

Jaune: "Seriously?!"

Trey: "Hey: Your dad's right. All you need is confidence and you can pull off anything! Just look!"

Jaune looks back... And Yang, Ruby, Weiss, Pyrrha, and Blake are all blushing deeply and staring back at him. Even Weiss looks hungry.

Nora: "Wowwww! Can you teach Ren that too, Uncle Trey?"

Trey: "I shall do my best! As your uncle, I should train you to be good with women!"

Jaune: "Uh, ah..."

Glynda Goodwitch knocks on the door, and enters.

Glynda: "Hello all. Jaune? I believe we had a tutoring assignment."

Jaune: "OH! I-I'm so sorry Professor! I didn't mean to-I just lost track of time!" He checked his Scroll "Oh, I missed your call! I'm so sorry!"

Pyrrha: twitch "Hello Professor... How... Interesting that you have Jaune's Scroll number!"

Glynda: "Of course I do. He asked for additional help because he didn't want to let any of you down."

Nora: "Aw!"

Ruby: blush "Oh, really?"

Jaune: "I-I help with her paperwork in return!"

Glynda: Wry expression "So that the rest of you don't end up in detention anymore than you already do."

Yang: "Wha-Seriously Stud?! Why would you do that?!"

Jaune: "I mean... You're all my friends so I wanted to help out however I could."

Weiss: "There is such a thing as being too generous!"

Trey stares at Jaune, and at Glynda. His cigarette burns as his Aura erupts in flames.

Trey: "BUT MAYBE I TAUGHT YOU TOO WELL, JAUNE!"

Jaune: "What?!"

Trey: "YOU SEDUCED A BEAUTIFUL OLDER WOMAN INTO YOUR HAREM, TOO?!"

Jaune: "WHAT?! NO! I-I DIDN'T-!"

Glynda: bright red "Wh-What?!"

Ruby: "He'd have better not!"

Blake: bright red, considering "Well..."

Pyrrha: "PROFESSOR! How-You can't do that!"

Glynda: "I DIDN'T!"

Jaune: "I REALLY DIDN'T!"

Trey: "WELL WHAT'S WRONG WITH HER?! YOU SEE A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN LIKE THAT AND YOU DON'T TRY TO ROMANCE HER?!"

Jaune: "I-I gave her a massage?"

RWBY + Pyrrha: "YOU WHAT?!"

Glynda: bright red "ENTIRELY PLATONIC!"

Trey: "WHAAAAT?! DAMN YOU JAUNE! YOUR STUPID OBLIVIOUS HAREM LEAD GENES! WHY DID THEY HAVE TO SKIP MY GENERATION?!"

Nora: "Doesn't that mean you would be oblivious and couldn't enjoy it?!"

Trey: "... Good point!" Calms down, lets Jaune go "Sorry nephew. Got a little carried away."

Jaune: "Uhhh... No problem?"

Trey: "Apologies, Deputy-Headmistress Goodwitch. I misunderstood the situation between you and my nephew."

Glynda: "I... It is entirely professional, I assure you, Mister Arc."

Trey: "Good... So..." Grins and spins up to her, taking her hand and kissing it "Let's talk about us, light of my life~!"

Glynda: "E-Excuse me?!"

Trey: "A heavenly angel had fallen to Earth in front of me and has set my soul alight with her feminine magic! Oh please, my dear lady, be mine!"

Glynda: "Ah... I'm just fine, thank you."

Trey: "Playing hard to get? I understand. A babe like you is probably fighting off losers right and left... Let me assure you, I'm not like those other men! I'm not afraid of your riding crop-Indeed, I crave it. MAKE ME YOUR LITTLE DOGGY! BOW WOW!"

Glynda yelps and blasts Trey out the window with her Semblance. She breathes hard, glaring after him with a slight blush.

Ruby: "... Is he always like that?"

Jaune: "Tragically, yes."

Weiss: "Now I recognize some of those corny lines. You were better off just being yourself, Arc..." At Yang, Ruby, Blake and Pyrrha's looks. "N-Not that I'm interested!"

Blake: smirk "So tsundere."

Weiss: "I AM NOT!"
 
Perchance to Dream
Ten year old Jaune Arc was dreaming.

Usually his dreams are silly things, like flying or a castle made of candy. Sometimes he dreams of being a hero, saving princesses (though he's never actually seen one) and killing Grimm.

But sometimes he has these odd dreams. There's no fights (usually) and he's in a strange place with strange people.

This time he's in a big building floating in the night sky. There's pretty stars and planets circling the building. The building itself is weird too. The walls are black wood, actual trees not planks or stuff, and the floor is covered in so many different small orange rugs he can't even tell what color it is.

There's big beanbag chairs everywhere and one of those big counters where dad keeps that nasty juice that gives you a headache (he snuck some once. He was puking for hours).

Oh and there's a guy laying on the counter watching him. He's odd too.

His skin is white, like paper white, which makes the glowing orange hair and neon green eyes stand out more. He might have looked intimidating with his sharp teeth and being so tall (he stretched across the entire counter!) if he wasn't wearing fluffy fox slippers and a big fluffy bathrobe.

"Hi there, how'd you end up in my bar?"

what's a bar? He's not usually supposed to talk to strangers but this is a dream so it's ok right?

"I'm Jaune Arc, and I'm here cuz this is a dream!"

The man seems confused and amused.

"Jaune Arc huh? One of my sisters favorites. Well I can't really tell you my name so you can call me whatever you want. I'm not sure what we're doing in your dream buddy. What do you wanna do?"

"Let's be heroes Mr.Bob!"

The man falls off the counter when he hears the name.

"Bob? Ok, Bob it is. I dunno about being a hero kid, not sure i'd be good at it."

"You don't like helping people?"

"Sure I do but there's plenty of ways to help people kid."

"Really?"

"Sure, doctors help people, charities help people, scientists help people."

"I know charity is good, and doctors like mom help people but how do scientists help people? It thought they just made things go boom and laughed when there was thunder?"

"That's tv scientist. Real scientist make things.....and laugh at thunder. Scientist help make the medicine your mom uses and other stuff that make peoples lives better."

"So scientist are better than heroes?"

"Not saying that, saying scientist are a different kind of hero."

Jaune was confused by this so he did what his dad does when talks start going ways he doesn't like. Change the subject.

"Hey you said you have a sister? And I'm her favorite?"

"I have a lot of family, and you're one of her favorites. She likes people who know what they want, and you want to help people."

"Yeah! What's her name?"

"Sorry buddy can't tell you that, why don't you pick a name for her too?"

"Ok. Will I ever meet Miss bob-ette?"

Jaune must have picked a good name because Bob was smiling a big smile.

"Probably not but I'll tell her you said hi."

Jaune started feeling tingly. That means he's gonna wake up soon.

"Bye Mr.Bob!"


[Madness of Evolution] watched the child fade away.

How odd for a human soul to repeatedly end up falling into godly realms. Still it's something new and new is good.

Hopefully he got the kid interested in science over swinging a sword. It's not glorious but being under his banner would definitely be better than under his sister [All Consuming Ideals]. He didn't lie when he said his sister liked him, but just because he's a favorite doesn't mean he'll be treated well (as the Taurus boy proves). She can't help it, it's her nature. People suffer for their ideals.

[Madness of Evolution] put aside thoughts of Jaune Arc. someone else caught his attention. A man willing to tear off a chunk of his soul to create artificial life.

Absolutely insane. Inspired and innovative technique. How wonderful.
 
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"Innocent" Members of the White Fang
Teams RWBY and JNPR had intercepted another White Fang operation in Vale. This time though, Blake managed to get close enough to give Roman Torchwick a good haranging.

Her voice rose, her eyes blazing with righteous fury.

"HOW COULD YOU MAKE THESE INNOCENT FAUNUS WORK FOR YOU?!" She demanded.

"They're terrorists, not exactly innocent to begin with, Kitty Kat," Roman said, his voice dry. "Seriously, what, did Adam just make you get the coffee?"

"NO! I was his second in command!" Blake snapped.

"Uh-huh. I'm sure you were recruited for your brains, sweetheart," Roman taunted. Ruby held Blake back as she lunged, her Aura flaring.

"I mean, he has a point, Blake," Yang pointed out.

Blake shook her head furiously.

"I… I'm sure the Faunus working for the White Fang were all misguided and innocent!"

A White Fang goon shrugged. "No, I'm a rapist."

Another piped up.

"I get kids hooked on drugs."

"I make drugs! To get kids hooked on them!"

"I'm a rapist," the first repeated.

"You already said that," the second goon muttered.

"Well, I like rape!" the first insisted.

Another goon sighed. "I owned a mattress store franchise."

Gasps echoed.

"You make me sick!" the first goon spat.

Blake's eyes widened, her voice desperate as she zeroed in on another White Fang goon. "Well, what about you?!"

"I was a corporate lawyer. For the SDC," this goon said.

"But you quit and joined the White Fang to fight the good fight?" Blake asked, hopeful.

"Actually, it's because I was a serial killer," the goon admitted.

Yang raised an eyebrow. "…You seriously didn't know?"

"I-I'm sure it's not representative of the entire White Fang! Really!" Blake stammered.

"And you call me a spoiled princess," Weiss scoffed.

"Um, do you need our help?" Jaune called.

"Just sorting some stuff out, Jaune!" Ruby called back. "I think Blake's having a mental crisis!"

Jaune sighed.

"I'll get the tuna and scratch behind her ears."

"Thank you!"
 
Why Jaune Shouldn't Use Crocea Mors
So, recently AJT posted about a Naruto based, "Why Jaune shouldn't use" over at FFN.net

And since we have another Shonen Protagonist who shares........scary number of similarities with Jaune(Sun is the only acceptable Naruto in RWBY), I decide to write my own little Prose. What I like to call -->

Why Jaune shouldn't use....... Crocea Mors!?
BAM! BAM!

Rang out two shots as they hit Jaune right in the chest, while his Aura protected him but the recoil from the projectiles' impacts, somehow, managed to slam him backwards. The surprising attack came from the latest of Salem's agents. A unnervingly pale, tall, lanky fellow, with green makeup following the tear streak of his eyes with similar colored green eyes.

Jaune quickly gathered his bearings, and tried to retrieve his Scroll and alert his friends, if only, but somehow his alert couldn't reach them!

"There is no use for your futile flailing", calmly, almost lazily said this unknown person.

"For no matter how hard a fish prays, despair would consume it still, on the Butcher's board"

Jaune wanted to really, really punch his stupid face in but the difference in their capabilities was too much. And somehow he had managed to isolate him and box him in this part of the Ruins, present at the heart of Vacuo's harsh deserts.

Now looking at certain death in face, all with the bastard's uninterested look, as if this whole ordeal was nothing but a regularity in is schedule was actively pissing him off. Yes, he knew he could get frustrated, get hung up on things, but this genuine rage he was feeling, it was much more recent, much more fresh.

'Heh, and here I thought if I could just be good enough to stand with them, all my problems would be solved, FOOL, ' thought Jaune to himself, now realizing that power was it's own curse. His weird Semblance, one he had taken to call Archetype, allowed him to gain some weird skills and personalities once he got in contact with a weapon, but strangely not on any weapon, only weapons of Huntsmen.

Through this he gained capability, and in that he believed that he could actually protect people, yet all it took was one slightly more capable monster in Salem's little army and here he was, separated from the rest of his team, as they were called to answer another disaster in Vacuo.

Through his Friends and Comrades and little tricks, Beacon still stood tall even after Salem's machinations after the Vytal Festival, but to placate the terror and fear of the larger populace of Remnant, Ozpin directed them to take missions alongside other kingdoms.

"I hope you have made peace, while it was certainly..... new to let myself act like this, I must move forward", and almost lazily he began to charge up his Lance/Cannon weapon, only instead of Aura or Dust, it was powered by what appeared to be liquid Grimm essence, the same essence that vaporized once you fell a grimm, now concentrated and coalescing, in the insidious sphere of verdant and dark glow.

Time stood still

What are you waiting for now, fool~

NO! Stay away from this!

Oh, that looks like fun, come on let me take a crack at it~~

I said stay out!

Let me out NO, let me NO, let meNO, let meNO, let meNO, let meNO, let meNO, let meNO, let meN-

OUT!
And everything moved

All at once, a brilliant yet terrible force exploded out from Jaune's bloodied, hunched body, armor broken at places and clothes scraped at some others, yet the show of power from his being contrasted absolutely with his broken form.

This force managed to disperse his opponents strong yet admittedly half heartedly created sphere of destruction, but this stranger managed to endure this titanic show of dominance with nothing more than a step back and covering his face.

Suddenly, Jaune rose, but in an eerie, unnatural manner, as though an animated puppet rather than a living being.

!

He immediately threw himself backward, still sending but now bending and back almost parallel to the ground, his arms were brought up, one hand twitching and clawing at nothing but air while the other clutched one half of his face as the dome of force around him grew, hi remaining upper body's armor and clothes explodes as he gave a final terrifying roar!

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH-", he roared out and finally after an even stronger explosion the force around him suddenly vanished, raising a dust cloud.

Once it was cleared, he stood straight, Crocea Mors in its Great Sword form, merged with its Shield to make a larger, broader blade.

But something was different in his posture. It was uncaring, slouching at one side.

But the worst was his face. The immediate feature that stood out was a half of his face covered in a terrible, almost bone like, mask with red marking running from top to bottom, not unlike that of a Grimm. His eyes, stretched terrifyingly wide with darkened sclera and burning poisonous yellow irises.

And a manic grin on his face as he looked at his opponent with pure HUNGER!

Before the stranger could comment on this development, His lance moved, blocking and barely holding off an attack that came from Janue or whatever stood in his place as this grinning new entity, pushed and suddenly both were face to face, as if this entity's strength was enough to one handedly push against his guard despite the mechanical advantage he had.

This grinning menace looked at him, salivating from its mouth and said, "You know, I really want to kiss you right now. But all of that love is over shadowed by this overwhelming hunger, so please kind sir", he said, softly but the quality of his voice felt like two separate audio files echoing together, as he took his free hand and put it on the blade of the larger Crocea Mors," won't you feed this poor sinner?" he said as suddenly the blade glowed a darkened gold and an explosion of this....Aura(?) went off.

Jaune. Please I am begging, be alright.

Thought Pyrrha as she ran along with the rest of team JNPR, following the sight and sound of another explosion the fifth in under 40 seconds hoping that this constant activity in that area meant that at least some struggle was going on unless the perpetrator was a simple sadist doing it for their own sick desires.

Salem has no scarcity of those in her arms.

Said a terrified part of her psyche, even she destroyed another Beowulf that tried to block her path, with her Akuo.

She owed her life to her team leader, among many other reasons why she held him so dear, she wouldn't bear the thought of something happening to him.
Oh Gods, please, protect him.

Her Prayer sent, she again sped Ren and Nora along with herself with her semblance so that they may reach their leader quicker. Ren shouted a warning to conserve her Aura, but her turmoiled heart wouldn't let her hear anything till she managed to ensure his safety.

And removed whatever threat was posed to him
Noir Verde, was getting irritated, a first for him yet understandable as this animal kept leaping and bounding and swinging at him with that that giant blade of his, each hit carrying a thundering crack of Aura(?) that had forced him to regenerate his arms more than a few time, followed by his cackling laugh, sounding like the screech of a Nevermore, as he was forced to defend and bring out his wings, terrible bat-like wings, to dodge but when that vector of attack was covered, suddenly that animal started to leap around and use the frankly absurdly large pillars of the ruins and run on them, keeping up with him even at he ran at an acute angle towards the ground rather than perpendicular.

His wings given to him by his mistress, were tattered, and he couldn't even focus on healing them because as if this display of thorough degradation of sense and order wasn't done yet, that glowing mass of Aura(?) surrounding his blade now started to shoot like projectiles as he swung his blade from a distance!

The worst part was that this feral beast was learning, shrugging of his hits that he knew could level buildings and if anything managed to get through, his Aura(?) healed, but making sure that same pattern of attacks couldn't hold its potency against him for more than three clashes, even parrying and blocking somewhat strategically.

Why isn't his Aura depleting. And why does he feel like....us?
Thought Noir, as he tried to once again gain ground by launching another giant blast which that beast simply charged through, any minor wound healed instantly if he even took any.

He decide he had enough of this beast, and changed tactics.

He charged his lance with the grace of his mistress, and rushed forward as well, as if to meet him in a clash, but just when he was about to actually deliver the blow, he switched and feinted.

And this beast anticipated even that and moved to adjust same time as him! But that was fine, he decided to use a more uncouth tactic and as he got himself in position close to, he headbutted him, with all his might, something that in his hindsight was a certainly unwise decision.

It cracked his mask a little but seemed to affect more himself than this animal, and just about when he though another empowered slash of his would land on his chest-something that would cause even him problem healing- something came blindingly fast, too fast for Noir to notice and stabbed him in his chest!

But, instead of using this opportunity to chop him up, this beast looked at the projectile- A spear- and he hesitated, eyes widened, as if in recognition.

"Dammit not now!"

cried the beast as his hand seemed to clutch his ruined mask despite his struggling and rip the ruined mask off. Quicker than he could protest, and suddenly Jaune's eyes seemingly went normal, as he looked directly at Noir for a moment.

A moment in which Noir went to attack Jaune, now seemingly lucid, launching a small blast at him which launched him a little back but at the same time a flying grenade hit Noir straight in the chest, exploding in pink smoke.

While the grenade wasn't nearly as potent as the boy's slashes, he was already weakened, and was thus in great pain, yet he bit his lower lip to stave off the pain, heal a little while the smoke covered him, and used his wings to quickly fly off in the cover of the smoke.



Ren watched the wretched monster flying off like a scared rat, as he also shot at him with Stormflower, but his bullets seemingly doing no damage on him.

Maybe I really should switch to a higher caliber.

He filed it for later, making sure that Jaune was alright was important right now.

He looked over at his leader, while Pyrrha scanned all over a kneeling Jaune who was now clutching the handle of his enlarged Crocea Mors for support.

He was on one knee, hi eyes were wide as he panted, taking the support of his weapon, as Pyrrha looked over him with tears in her eyes. Then Jaune raised his arm and put it on Pyrrha's hand in a gesture of placation, which seemingly worked as she broke into a sob and went to hug and clutch to Jaune, with Nora following suite as it was clear that their precious leader was not severely injured.

An action he followed through as well. Finally calming his racing Heart down.
Jaune hugged his team back, feeling that sense of being torn apart finally settle as if parts of himself were re united with his body.

I should be dead. At least broken beyond repair.

His analytical mind went to work, as he confirmed that his team was safe, with no injuries and finally focused that he himself, while feeling as if all his bones were being flattened by a Hydraulic Press and blood Vessels seemed to be transporting fire, there was seemingly nothing broken or even too damaged, other than superficial wounds.

He hugged his team back tighter, knowing all four of them needed this and close his eyes. Jaune's tiredness started to catch up on him. With a pat he signaled Pyrrha, and looked at her.

She somehow understood his meaning, and along with Nora and Ren, carried him up and started to help him towards the Medic aid that just arrived behind the team.

Looks like Ren probably called them, thought Jaune as he forced himself to stay awake.

But what....... is happening....... to me? Jaune asked in his Psyche as the field medics stated to measure his vitals and tried to keep him steady, loading him up on the back of the ambulance.

.....This is.... Fine.

For now.
Fin
 
Crawling Chaos
To go with my idea...
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"Hey Jaune? What's this?" Ruby asks as she pulls out a large crystal from the filled box that he and Nora keep in their closet. She ignores, again, the sign that says 'DO NOT TOUCH! ESPECIALLY TEAM RWBY, OZPIN, PYRRHA, AND EVERYONE!!' in big red letters.

Jaune, turning over and looking at it, pales as he recognizes what she had grabbed. "Ruby," he says in a pleading voice. "Please put that down and walk away slow..."

"Oops," comes from Ruby's lips as she drops the crystal, the myriads of cuts giving off infinite reflections for but a moment as the sunlight hits it. And as soon as it hits the carpet, a mass of figures burst out of it. Inhuman and unnatural shadows, mists, and more launch themselves from the gem, laughing and speaking in voices that makes the ears of everyone in Beacon start to bleed even as quite a few start to suffer seizures.

"DAMN IT!" Jaune shouts out as he reaches under his bed and pulls out a customized shotgun and a pouch full of special shells. "Not again! Please don't tell me they remember.."

"Remember my future husband? Darn right I do!" comes from behind Jaune as silvery hair falls around him. Ruby looks on in shock as from Jaune's shadow against the wall a girl in a black and white checkered dress, silvery hair, and green eyes manifests. "Thanks for letting me out! I'm the Chaos that is Crawling to Jaune with a Smile! Nyarl.."

"Please let my dear little brother go annoyance," another voice cuts the silvery haired girl off even as shadowy tenderils grab her and throws her out the window with a shout of 'GOTCHARD!' "Now then, let big sister Chiyo help Jaune."

The rest of Team JNPR rushes through the door, weapons ready only to freeze at the side of a tall, pale skinned woman with a necklace made of eyes, goat hooved feet, and horns atop her hair that frames her long black hair. She turns a gentle smile to them, "Oh hello there. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Jaune's big sister Chiyo."

Outside of Beacon, everyone can hear five voices, all but one being part of Beacon's now becoming more infamous team, shout out at once, "DAMN IT RUBY!!"

"You're part of the problem Nyaruko!" Jaune's voice could be heard seconds later..
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Edit: Wow! A actual threadmark and likes already! Thank you all!
 
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