[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

[AndrewJTalon]

- - -

Maybe it wasn't the smartest idea to go to a guy's only party at another dorm, but damnit, Jaune needed some bro time. Growing up in a household with eight women made him desire bro time. It was treasured.

That said, things had gotten a bit rowdy. And if Cardin was going to challenge Professor Port to a headbutt contest, well, he didn't have any desire to get in the way. Bro Code dictated that he didn't have to get in the middle of that or root for either side.

Or stick around when Professor Goodwitch inevitably broke it up.

That said, he was feeling very tipsy. That moonshine may have not been a good choice. Well, not ten cups, anyway.

Even with Aura, he was very tipsy. He staggered through the hallways, struggling to keep his focus.

He turned a corner, and scowled.

"Books!" He growled. "Freaking books!"

All these shelves full of books! That's not where he wanted to be!

He spotted a familiar twitchy bow attached to a familiar secret Faunus at a desk. He walked over to her, feeling quite put out.

Blake looked up at him, in curiosity.

"Jaune?" She asked.

"Blake!" Jaune said, scowling, "Why-Why are there all these-these books around?!"

She blinked at him.

"Because it's a library?" She asked.

Jaune nodded, waving his finger.

"R-Right... Library... Not where I wanna be..."

"You're drunk," Blake said, wrinkling her nose.

He scowled back.

"You're rude," he said.

"No, you're drunk," she stated, "That's just a fact."

"And you're mean," Jaune grumbled, "You're so mean! Stop being mean to Ruby and yer team, damnit!"

Blake's eyes widened.

"Ex-Excuse me? I am not mean-!"

"You're TOTALLY MEAN!" Jaune moaned, "To Sun too! He's such a good guy! Sure, he's-he's a simp-Not that I can talk-But he's a GOOD GUY!"

Blake shook her head quickly.

"I-I'm not mean-!"

"You know what you need?" Jaune stated, scowling. He reached out and grabbed her, yanking off her bow. Blake was so shocked she didn't resist. Her eyes widened as his hands went to work.

"O-Ooooh... Ahhhh... J-Jaune, no, wait-!"

"You've been begging for this for a long time!" Jaune growled.

"N-No, no, I didn't-!"

"You're lying!" Jaune growled, "You hide all this, but act so damn smug, tempting us men! And now a man's doing what he should've done FROM THE START!"

"No-No-Nyaaaaahhhhh~!"

"Yessss," Jaune groaned happily, "How DARE you hide your adorable kitty ears... And the cute kitty sounds you make when you get SCRITCHED! YOU'RE BEGGING FOR IT! TO BE SCRITCHED SO YOU MAKE ADORABLE KITTY SOUNDS!"

He pulled Blake into his lap and scritched behind her ears furiously. Helpless, Blake nyahed and meowed and crooned.

"Oooh, n-no, Jaune, nooooo-nyaaaaahhhhhnnnn~!"

"Tell me to stop," Jaune growled, "Tell me to stop, and I'll stop-!"

"Nyaaaaaahhhhhh! D-Don't stop, DON'T STOPPPPPP~! HUMAN FINGERS ARE THE BESSSSST~! NYAAAAAHHHH!"

- - -

Jaune awoke in the morning with a terrible headache. He groaned and rubbed his eyes. What the hell...?

"I thought Aura overcame hangovers," he mumbled, "Stupid bullshit soul magic doesn't make any sense."

He sat up and rubbed his face.

"Urrrrggghhh... What did I do last night?"

Someone handed him a drink. Jaune downed it, tasting cool, refreshing water.

"Ah, thanks..."

He blinked at the smiling Blake next to him.

"Blake? Wha-?"

"Good morning, Master-nyah~," Blake said cheerfully, "I apologized to my team and gave them hugs nyah."

Jaune stared at Blake. Her smile was unnerving... But even more unnerving was the collar around her neck. The tag read:

Blake Belladonna. Owner: Jaune Arc.

"So, what will we do today Master, nyah~?"

Oh boy this is going to be a long day...

- - -

 

[sperance]

SCRATCH SCRATCH SCRATCH GET PETTED GET PETTED GET PETTED

 

[Ovid]

Blake Belladonna. Owner: Jaune Arc.

Click to shrink...

Huh. I think this is going to give Pyrrha ideas. Namely, do those collars come in red or gold? And can she wear one with the Arc symbol in public?

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

Or stick around when Professor Goodwin inevitably broke it up.

Click to shrink...

Did Beacon get a new teacher?

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Did Beacon get a new teacher?

Click to shrink...

Fixed from autocorrection.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Cardin, Sun, Jaune and Ren are just chilling out and fishing at a river on Beacon's grounds.

Jaune: "This is nice, huh guys? Just bros being bros."

Cardin: "Well, I do need to rescue you guys from estrogen poisoning from time to time."

Sun: "Uh, my team is all guys too?"

Cardin: "You have Neptune."

Sun: "He is my best friend but... You're not wrong."

Jaune: "Okay... What were we talking about?"

Cardin: "Ren's repressed sexuality."

Ren: "It's not repressed. I'm just stoic. Shortstacks for life. Thicc in the best places."

Jaune: "So why haven't you made a move on Nora?"

Sun: "You're childhood friends, just get together already."

Ren: "It's hard to stop my feelings of treasuring our friendship from killing my boner."

Jaune: "Huh. That's fair."

Ren: "Though Ruby is starting to grow in Nora places so I could maybe practice-"

Jaune: "Slow your roll there, bucko. Man up and take the final exam, don't go looking for practice tests. Besides, Yang would murder you and so would I."

Ren: "Fair."

Sun: "She's part of Jaune's harem anyway."

Jaune: "I don't have a harem."

Cardin: "Yeah, and Velvet doesn't tie her tits down."

Jaune: "I do not-! Wait really?"

Cardin: nods, reverent "I have seen the promised land. It is good."

Sun: "So jealous you got an actual bunny girl for a girlfriend."

Ren: nods "Bunny girls are hot."

Cardin looks at Sun, confused.

Cardin: "Don't you have a catgirl? Or is she also part of Jaune's harem?"

Jaune: "DAMNIT I DON'T HAVE A HAREM!" huffs "Also Sun? You'd better tell Neptune to knock it off. Either commit to Weiss or don't."

Ren: "Or Jaune will add her to his harem."

Jaune: "I SWEAR TO GOD-"

Sun: "I mean I keep telling him not to act like a manwhore. It has literally nearly gotten him killed. But he keeps doing it. Hell I think he's doing it to spite you, Jaune."

Ren: "Envy is such an ugly emotion."

Cardin: "...Stop glaring at me. You could enjoy the perks of having a girlfriend if you actually confessed to Nora."

Sun: "Jaune handed Velvet to you on a silver platter! No effort, Cardin! You lucked into it!"

Jaune: "Imma be honest, I'm shocked that worked out the way it did. Super lucky for Cardin."

Cardin: "It-Well-Maybe a little! But, I-I would have romanced her on my own... Eventually..."

Much scoffing

Cardin: "But hey, I made a move! What about you, Sun? Why aren't you doing anything with Blake?"

Sun: "Well... She is crazy. Luckily I like them that way, but it takes time and skill. I'm wearing her down though! Got her to smile!"

Jaune: "Ruby eating a cookie through her nose will do that."

Sun: "Even so!"

Ren: "Are you sure you want to go for crazy?"

Everyone stares at him.

Ren: "... Right, forget I said anything. Carry on."

 

[AndrewJTalon]

- - -

"Ahem. Jaune."

Jaune looked up. He was trying to do his homework in the library, while Adrian sat in his carrier and chewed on a plastic ring. The Schnee heiress looked a bit uncomfortable.

"Yes Weiss?" He asked, bracing himself. He'd made Neptune go out and dance with her, and worn a dress at the dance. He'd also given up on trying to win her heart-Not that he'd had a lot of time to, what with having to look after Adrian.

She fidgeted a bit.

"I uh... I couldn't help but notice you're looking after your nephew a lot more."

Jaune nodded.

"I am, yeah. Saphron and Terra are both REALLY busy with the Vytal Festival."

Weiss nodded.

"I see. I was hoping I could help."

Jaune blinked.

"Oh? How so?"

Weiss cleared her throat.

"I was thinking we could go out with Adrian, on the weekend," she said carefully, "You could use a bit of... Of fun. I can watch him with you!"

Jaune blinked. He blinked again.

"Um, really?"

"Don't get the wrong idea," Weiss said quickly, "This-This is not a date-!"

Jaune held up his hands and shook his head.

"N-No! No, I get that! I'm not-I stopped doing that-!"

"Good! Good, because it isn't," Weiss said, "I-I just... I like cute things. Your nephew is very cute. You're doing a good job of looking after him, and well... I thought perhaps I could help out. We could just go out, have some lunch, you can play... Video games or-or something? And I can watch Adrian, while we go together!"

She paused, and turned red.

"And this is absolutely not a date! At all! We're... We're just friends! Watching your cute nephew! Together! While having fun!"

Jaune blinked again.

You know, in the Mistralian comics I read, this usually means she's actually asking me out on a date and this is just a cover... But... Nah! Come on! How often do those come true?

She's probably just being nice after I tried to help her with Neptune, that's all.

Jaune smiled and nodded.

"Sure. Though uh, you should tell Neptune so he doesn't get the wrong idea-"

Weiss sniffed haughtily, her face filled with disgust.

"Oh, don't worry about him," she seethed, "That useless cad is probably chasing after some new skirt. He dumped me right after the dance, can you believe it?!"

Jaune scowled.

"Geez Weiss... I-I'm sorry. If I'd known-"

"No, no, it's fine," Weiss said with a nod, and a small smile. "Honestly? It may be a blessing in disguise. It lets me see things I... I overlooked before," she said.

Jaune blinked again as she stared at him, with a soft look he had only seen her give Adrian. He blushed and nodded slowly.

"Uh... That's good... So uh, when do you want to go?"

"Saturday, around seven would be good," she said. Jaune nodded.

"Sounds good. Adrian's been getting up pretty early. I think the crib Saphron sent with him is uncomfortable-"

"Oh! Well then we can buy him a new one!" Weiss said brightly. Jaune shook his head.

"You-You don't have to do that-!"

"I-I insist!" Weiss said with a beam. She reached out and stroked the top of Adrian's head. The baby cooed at the attention and gave her a big, toothless grin. She tittered. "Such an adorable baby should have only the best!"

She smiled warmly at Jaune.

"And such an attentive da-er, uncle, shouldn't have to struggle to take care of his... Nephew, mm? Besides, I was a bit harsh to you at times. I... I didn't know what you had gone through."

Jaune shook his head.

"N-No, I was kind of-It was way too over the top, I'm really sorry-"

"We-We all make mistakes in the past," Weiss said with a nod, "But you've proven your maturity. So I should definitely give you... A second look."

Jaune flushed, and nodded.

"That... Sure," he said. Weiss snuggled with Adrian a bit longer, before she gave Jaune another warm smile.

"See you tomorrow!" She said, turning and practically skipping off. Jaune stared after her, and looked over at Adrian.

"Is it just me, or have things gotten kind of weird since you showed up?" He asked. Adrian blew a raspberry, and Jaune chuckled.

"Yeah, probably just me..."

- - -

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

"I-I insist!" Weiss said with a beam. She reached out and stroked the top of Adrian's head. The baby cooed at the attention and gave her a big, toothless grin. She tittered. "Such an adorable baby should have only the best!"

She smiled warmly at Jaune.

"And such an attentive da-er, uncle, shouldn't have to struggle to take care of his nephew, mm? Besides, I was a bit harsh to you at times."

Click to shrink...

Weiss and Winter battle for time with Jaune and Adrian.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Weiss and Winter battle for time with Jaune and Adrian.

Click to shrink...

I imagine the Beacon rumor mill suggests that Adrian is really Jaune's son and his sisters adopted him to care for him because the baby mama either died tragically or ran off on Jaune. Which has some fun potential.

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

I imagine the Beacon rumor mill suggests that Adrian is really Jaune's son and his sisters adopted him to care for him because the baby mama either died tragically or ran off on Jaune. Which has some fun potential.

Click to shrink...

Every unattached women at Beacon - "I can fix him!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

A Scroll was ringing in Team RWBY's dormroom. The team was slowly getting their stuff together for another morning of classes. Ruby was the one to answer the call, groaning a bit.



"Hello?"



A pretty but severe looking young woman greeted her. Her eyes were blue and her hair was blonde. In fact, she looked a lot like...



"Hello? Jaune? Are you there?"



Ruby blinked. "Eh? No. This is Ruby Rose."



The woman frowned.



"Why do you have my brother's Scroll?"



"This is my scroll-Wait, you're one of his sisters?!" Ruby cried.



"Yes, my name is Tanya," she introduced herself, then made a face briefly, "Are you friends of his?"



"Yes!" Ruby said cheerfully. "Sorry you got the wrong number. Want me to go get him?"



Tanya shook her head.



"No, though... You are his friend, yes?"



Ruby nodded eagerly.



"Yes! His best friend! We help him out with Adrian all the time!"



"Then I suppose I could relay the message," Tanya said, with a mischievous look in her eyes Ruby missed, "But I hope you will only share this with other friends of Jaune? It's... Personal."



Ruby nodded, eager to learn more about her male besty's past. He barely talked about it!



"I promise!"



"Good. Adrian is safe and he'll be fine. The Bitch has no legal claim," Tanya said.



Ruby blinked. Her teammates tried to look like they weren't eavesdropping.



"Huh?"



She gave Ruby a faux surprised look that the young Reaper missed the significance of. "Oh? He didn't tell you?"



"Tell me what? What?" Ruby asked, silver eyes wide.



"Over a year ago, some bitch in our town seduced Jaune and got pregnant," Tanya said, "She was a gold digger and wanted to get into the family money, so she manipulated poor Jaune."



Tanya looked grim. Ruby gasped, as did Weiss and Yang. Blake did too, but she covered it up better.



"R-Really?!"



"Yes," Tanya grimaced, "Jaune was prepared to marry her, take responsibility, but then we found out she was planning on killing him and running off with his inheritance. We played the long game, and waited until she gave birth to Adrian to let them marry... And at the wedding, we found the poison she planned to use on Jaune and Adrian."



Ruby's eyes filled with tears. Yang swore. Weiss gasped, as Blake grimaced.



"How... How terrible!"



"Yup," Tanya said with a nod, "We gave her two options: She would leave and never comes back, or she would leave in a pinewood box. She ran off, abandoning her baby and Jaune."



"I... I never suspected," Ruby whispered. Tanya nodded.



"Poor Jaune does push the 'idiot act' a lot. It's his way of coping. Poor guy. Anyway, Saphron and Terra adopted Adrian, claimed he was theirs, and Jaune agreed to just play uncle. It was better that way. That Bitch can't get to him or Adrian... But I fear he may never recover from the damage to his heart. Just... Just tell him that Adrian is safe, please? Don't remind him of that heartache."



Ruby nodded eagerly as Tanya sniffled.



"I-I will! Poor Jaune... Don't worry, Tanya! I'll take good care of him! I-I promise! And so will all his friends!"



Tanya smiled, eyes shining with tears.



"Thank you Ruby. I'm so glad my brother has such good, caring friends... remember though! Please, don't tell him about all of this. Just tell him Adrian is safe. Anything else will open old wounds. Can you help him heal?"



Ruby blushed, then nodded eagerly.



"Absolutely!"



"Thank you, Ruby Rose," Tanya chuckled, "I'm so happy..."



- - -



In JNPR's dorm, a few minutes later, Jaune was getting dressed when his Scroll rang. He picked it up as Pyrrha fed Adrian. He gave her a grateful smile as he answered.



"Tanya! Hey! Still selling fridges to Atlas, huh?"



Tanya smirked.



"And making bank. Heard you got saddled with babysitting Adrian?"



Jaune shrugged.



"It's okay. I love playing uncle."



"Then you'll be happy to know our nephew's last test results came back fine," Tanya said, "He's perfectly healthy. He's safe and fine."



Jaune beamed, and rubbed Adrian's head. Pyrrha smiled with him.



"That's great! But uh, why call me about it?"



"Just wanted to make sure my favorite little brother knew," she demurred, "I'm not always calling just to stir up trouble."



"That'll be the day," Jaune deadpanned. "Nice talking to you, Tanya."



"Always! Also? Have fun~!" Tanya said, winking before she hung up. Jaune shook his head.



"Well. That's not ominous or anything..."



- - -



How does Tanya's prank go? And yeah, please, give me some feedback here.

 

[CILinkz]

Uncle Jaune is pretty damn awesome too bad its just a shorts i like child rearing fics like that

 

[AndrewJTalon]

On another subject, yes, I was thinking of this Tanya as Jaune's sister:

I mean at least one of his sisters could be a very sadistic venture capitalist slash soldier...

 

[Twisted]

I wonder how long until that story has spread across Beacons rumor mill, how many hear that soap opera sob story and immediately think 'I can fix his broken heart!'.

Also, that sob story has some eerie parallels to the,
Raven x Tai x Summer situation and could trigger Ruby and Yang, the "Rose Rebound Instinct" and Yang's "I am way better than my deadbeat mom" insecurities.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Blake and Jaune go out into Kuo Kuana proper. After such an emotional night, Blake is glad of the company. That said...

Blake: "I don't think the bunny ears and cologne are going to fool anyone, Jaune."

Jaune: "It let me get in here, didn't it?"

Blake: "I... Maybe, but long term, we need to think of some other strategy-"

A few Faunus females walk up with broad smiles.

Faunus Girl 1: "Hello, Lord Arc!"

Faunus Girl 2: "We're so happy to have you here!"

Faunus 3: "You're such an inspiration! A Faunus Prince from Northern Sanus?"

Faunus 4: "And so handsome, too!"

Jaune: "Errrr..."

Faunus 1: "And a Rabbit Faunus, too! Whatever woman snags you will be very lucky!"

Blake: takes his hand "Yes. I will be."

Jaune: clears his throat "Er, uh, yeah-"

The Faunus girls gasp... And bow.

Faunus Girl 1: "We're so sorry, Princess Blake! Of course-A Prince would be here for you!"

Faunus Girl 2: "Please forgive us!"

They rush off. Jaune looked over at Blake.

Jaune: "Wait, 'Princess'?"

Blake: "I'm... Not technically a princess but they keep calling me that. Always have. And... Well, it will hopefully keep Faunus from bothering you too much."

Jaune: "Er... I mean, I'm not actually a Prince-"

Blake: "And I'm not technically a Princess. Besides, you're getting on my case over deception?"

Jaune: "Heh. Fair enough."

Later, at lunch at Ghira and Kali's home...

Kali: "Well Blake, congratulations!"

Blake: "... On?"

Kali: "Why, the marriage of course! I was congratulated by everyone! Tell me, shall we have the wedding here?"

Blake: pales "What?!"

Jaune: "What?!"

Ghira: "Well, I'm perfectly happy with Jaune as a son in law, but I never expected you to move so fast, Blake!"

Kali: "Still, he's far better than Adam! What a creep!"

Ghira: "Yeah. That beast. If he comes around here I'll castrate him! Slowly."

Kali: "With the cheese grater, dear!"

Ghira: "You would be the expert, love!"

 

[Ovid]

...somehow, I dont think Blake's parents would mind of Jaune revealed to them that he's not a prince or a faunus.

"Oh, he's so brave to sneak into a faunus town, just to be with you. He just needed a disguise to fit in and set us at ease. Anyways, are you REALLY sure he's not a Rabbit faunus? After all, look at his number of siblings.
And besides, still better than that little-prick Adam."

 

[AndrewJTalon]

...somehow, I dont think Blake's parents would mind of Jaune revealed to them that he's not a prince or a faunus.

"Oh, he's so brave to sneak into a faunus town, just to be with you. He just needed a disguise to fit in and set us at ease. Anyways, are you REALLY sure he's not a Rabbit faunus? After all, look at his number of siblings.
And besides, still better than that little-prick Adam."

Click to shrink...

Yeah, Adam was already bad before he was written into some kind of wife beater. Dude was dating a chick who joined White Fang when she was 12. Sounds like grooming to me.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

- - -

Jaune woke up to warmth cuddled up against him. He blinked the sleep out of his eyes and looked around quickly, getting his bearings in the morning light streaming in through the windows. He looked around. Lots of artwork, posters of Faunus, and so many books...?

Wha... This isn't my room, where-?

He looked down. Blake was cuddled up against him, arms tight around his waist. Her face was buried in his chest, and she slept deeply. She looked... Content, which was a rare expression on her face.

They were both still clothed. Jaune breathed a sigh of relief. That was the last thing they needed to happen.

"Good morning Jaune," murmured Kali. Jaune slowly looked to his right. Kali was standing next to the bed, smiling cheerfully while his heart stopped.

He paled.

"I-Nothing-We didn't-!" He whispered. Kali pressed her finger to his lips and shook her head.

"I know," she whispered, "You were in no shape for that, emotionally."

Jaune nodded quickly. Kali smirked and winked.

"Not that I would mind," she said, "I would be happy to become a grandmother. Blonde kittens would be adorable."

His pale face turned bright red, as he squeaked around her finger. She withdrew her finger, still smiling at him. She winked.

"I'm glad, honestly," she said quietly, "That she has such a good friend like you. One who would come all this way, and try to help her. To get her back."

Jaune slowly nodded, though an awkward look came over his face.

"Um... I mean... We didn't really... Talk much," he whispered, "We barely exchanged a few words... She-She's more Ruby's friend than mine."

"Yet you're here," Kali said softly, "Why?"

Jaune shook his head.

"Someone had to," he murmured, "Someone... Someone had to pull everyone together. Someone had to get Yang out of her funk. Someone had to help Ruby recover, to keep Nora and Ren together..." He shook his head. "I'm... I'm the weakest. The most useless... So I did it."

Kali stared.

"Did what?"

He told her everything. About Pyrrha sacrificing herself to buy them time, and how he failed her. How he tried to keep Nora and Ren together after Vale fell. How he went to Ruby and worked with her, to keep her spirits up. How he actually fought Yang, got knocked through a wall, to snap her out of her depression. And how he went out to try and bring back Blake, all because Ruby asked him to.

"She... She said she couldn't do anything, that she was a failure," Jaune murmured, "But I didn't believe her. Not for a second. It wasn't her fault. Me...? I can't do anything worthwhile. I'm not strong, or fast, or smart-"

"Stop that," Kali said, quiet but stern. He looked up at her in shock as she glared. "You kept everyone together in the face of loss, defeat, and adversity. Stupid leaders will sacrifice everything in a hopeless battle just to save face. Good leaders will retreat after a loss, pull their forces back together, and hit back harder."

She rested a hand against his cheek, her eyes locked onto his.

"You aren't defeated until you stop fighting," she said softly, "As long as you keep getting back up, keep fighting, and never lose hope? You haven't been beaten. Your companions may be stronger, faster, and better trained... But an army needs leadership to win. It needs hope. You offer it. Never think that you don't matter."

Jaune sniffled. He tried to hide it.

"S-Sorry," he mumbled, "I-I'm sorry-"

"It's all right," Kali said compassionately, kissing the top of his head, "It's all right. It's hard to be strong for everyone else, all the time. I won't judge you for it. Everyone has their limits... But that doesn't make you weak."

Jaune managed a nod, after sniffling. He wiped his tears, but Blake's weight on his arm kept him down. He looked up as Kali pulled out a handkerchief and wiped his cheeks. She smiled warmly.

"I'm so glad you came though. I'm glad she has a friend willing to come all this way out for her," she said quietly. "Why don't you stay for a bit, Jaune, Hm?"

"I... I need to get Blake back... Or go back alone, if she won't come," he said. Kali nodded.

"I know. We'll see what we can do to help Vale. But Blake needs a friend... And we have some... Local troubles," she said. "We would appreciate your help."

Jaune shook his head.

"If I can... I'll try," he said. Kali beamed.

"Good," she nodded. "Now... Breakfast starts in an hour. You'd better get ready."

"R-Right," Jaune said. Kali then winked.

"Also? I meant what I said about grandkittens."

At his sputter, she vanished in a puff of smoke. Blake slowly woke up, blinked her eyes.

"Nnngh... Jaune? What... Why was my mother here?"

"Ah... Just telling me breakfast is in an hour," Jaune said quickly, bright red. Blake blinked again.

"Are you okay? Why are you so red-?"

"I'm fine!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

- - -

Breakfast was fairly quiet. Ghira wanted to take Jaune out to the Guard Barracks to test his combat skills. Jaune agreed. Blake had also wanted to go, but Kali held her back: She was nearly recovered from her injuries, but not quite to the point Kali wanted to let her resume her previous training routine. Kali wanted to work with Blake more on her Semblance anyway, and Blake reluctantly agreed.

They stood in the doorway to bid Ghira and Jaune goodbye. Kali kissed Ghira passionately, and he returned it-Much to the mortification of Blake and Jaune. They just stood there, awkwardly, as Kali and Ghira made out.

"Um... Have a... Good day?" Jaune managed. Blake nodded.

"You too, Jaune," she said softly. Her hands twitched, undecided on what to do. Jaune looked just as awkward, but managed a wave and smile when Ghira finished making out with his wife.

"We'll be back by dinner," Ghira said cheerfully, "I have to do some inspections anyway."

"Take care, darling," Kali said cheerfully. She beamed at Jaune. "You have a good day too, Jaune!"

"I-I will, Mrs. Belladonna-Er, Queen-Er-" Jaune stuttered. Kali giggled.

"Oh come now, Jaune. Call me Kali!"

"Er... Sure... Lady Kali," he managed. Kali hummed and smiled.

"Good enough for now! Off with you!"

Blake watched them go, the guards falling into line around them. She frowned deeply as she kept her eyes on Jaune, his fake bunny ears standing up out of his messy blond mane.

"He'll be fine," Kali said softly, "I made sure it was well secured. The cologne I gave him is better suited to rabbit faunus, too."

"Yes Mother," Blake said with a nod. She sighed softly. "I still can't believe he made it this far like that..."

Kali chuckled.

"In my own days in the White Fang? I got into high security areas in similar ways."

Blake stared at her in shock, and Kali smirked.

"Ninety percent of the time, if you look and act like you belong? Most people, human or Faunus, won't pay you a second glance."

"And the remaining ten percent?"

Kali's smirk gained teeth.

"That's when you bring out the claws."

- - -

As was typical of her mother, Blake's 'less physically demanding' exercises were still quite difficult, even in the warm Belladonna Dojo. She meditated, focusing on channeling her Aura into Shadow Clones and making them perform movements.

"Next one, jump up. Next one, jump down. Next one, roll right. Next one, roll left!"

Channeling Aura also helped her heal, but it was still challenging. She had her clones doing all sorts of things around her, sweat beading on her forehead, as her mother barked commands.

"Next one, look sexy for Jaune!"

Blake flushed, but obeyed instinctively. A Shadow Clone emerged wearing a sexy, come hither smile, toying with her kimono to tease its contents.

"M-MOTHER!" Blake cried. Kali lightly slapped the back of her head with a bokken. "OW!"

Kali hummed and looked the clone over.

"Not bad, but nowhere near seductive enough," she stated. Blake scowled up at her mother, rubbing the back of her head.

"That hardly seems suitable for training."

"No, but it does address something holding you back," Kali said softly. She looked Blake over. "You're usually much better at this, faster. You're distracted."

Blake closed her eyes.

"Jaune coming here... Brought up a lot of emotions," she admitted. "Emotions I... I don't want to deal with."

Kali sat down next to her daughter.

"I know that dealing with them is difficult," Kali said, "But it has to be done."

"Can't I... Can't I just raise an army and go help?" Blake asked, looking plaintively at her mother, "Wouldn't that be enough to... To make up for all of it?"

Kali chuckled sadly.

"Were it that easy," she sighed. She shook her head. "You must give your troops a reason to follow you, Blake. Trading on your name and rank alone isn't enough. Not for the important battles. The only way to be that person is to confront your demons and conquer them first."

Blake looked away, staring at the far wall.

"There's just so much," Blake murmured. Kali nodded.

"I know," she said, "But we can take it, a battle at a time. So... What about Jaune?"

Blake shut her eyes.

"... He..." She hesitated.

"He what?" Kali asked quietly.

"... He told me, last night," Blake continued, "That he wished he had died instead of Pyrrha. That he... He was the expendable one. The useless one."

"You don't agree?" Kali asked. Blake shook her head furiously.

"Of course I don't agree! He-He stayed! He pulled Ruby and Yang out of their depression! He kept Nora and Ren with him! He figured out so much, did so much... He came all the way out here! I-I never thought that of him!"

Blake sighed quietly.

"I mean... I never really thought much of him at all," she admitted, "He was... He was Ruby's goofy blond friend. The one who got stuck in a tree in Initiation. The one who kept getting beat up, trounced and humiliated. The one who was dense as a doorknob... I just..."

She hesitated again. Her voice became thick with emotion.

"We... We made jokes about him. About how useless he was. How weak he was. Sometimes, we joked that he shouldn't even be there. I thought... I thought they were just jokes. Back and forth. I thought that's how he took them since he always... Always laughed it off."

She closed her eyes again.

"But he took it to heart, after Pyrrha... Pyrrha was killed," she murmured. "He genuinely thinks he's good for nothing. He's done so much more than I did... And he still thinks I'm better."

She sniffled. Fat tears began to roll out of her eyes, and down her cheeks.

"Me... The one who poisons everything I touch. Ruins everything. The one who always runs away, when my friends... My friends need me," she whispered. "Look at me... A princess, sitting in a palace, and... And someone I dismissed is the one who did... Who did what I should have done... He still thinks I'm a good person. And... And I'm not."

She bowed her head, her tears peppering the wooden floor beneath her knees.

"... He shouldn't have come," she whispered, "His friends... They... They don't need me. They need him... And he doesn't believe it... It's my fault, Mama... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry...!"

Kali hugged her daughter tightly, as she sobbed. Blake tried to pull away, but Kali's grip was ironclad.

"It's all right, Blake, it's all right," Kali whispered, as her daughter wept.

- - -

The Home Guards were soldiers who split their time between guarding the city of Kuo Kuana and the Chieftain and members of the Council. They were well trained in melee combat, marksmanship, Dust use, and their Semblances. They drilled relentlessly, training whenever they didn't have anything else to do, led by some of Ghira's best commanders.

He had brought Jaune to the main training yard, and called up ten random guards. A mix of newcomers and seasoned veterans.

"This is Lord Jaune, from a Northern Sanus Faunus city," Ghira stated, and the guards nodded, "He will fight you all at once, non-lethally. Let's see how our brothers on Sanus are training their warriors."

Ghira stepped back, smiling at Jaune's worried expression. He then gestured to one of his Sergeants, Torg, a lizard Faunus, who walked up to his Chieftain. Ghira bent down and whispered in his ear.

"Get the Aura Measuring Sensor, please."

"Of course, My Lord," Torg said, turning and heading out. Ghira turned his eyes back and watched. The ten guards spread out and surrounded the hidden human.

Jaune pulled his sword and shield, and took a sure-footed stance with a determined look on his face.

The guards attacked Jaune from all sides and stayed in pairs to cover one another, wielding swords and spears.

Five minutes later, Torg returned... To see all of the guards knocked out or down, with Jaune apologizing to them and Ghira. Torg nearly dropped the Aura Sensor, but he recovered and kept it focused on Jaune.

"I'm really, really sorry," Jaune said. Ghira laughed.

"It was nothing they can't walk off, son! Don't you worry!" He clapped Jaune's shoulder with a large hand, and grinned. "Why not tell them how you did that, hm?"

"Sure, no problem, sir," Jaune said with a quick nod. The guards, now looking much less skeptical, assembled in front of Jaune. Ghira walked over to Torg, who shook the Aura Sensor and frowned at the results.

"Well?" Ghira asked softly. Torg looked at his Chieftain with wide eyes.

"He's got more Aura than two squads combined, at least!" Torg gasped.

Ghira hummed, and walked up to Jaune's side. He smiled at Jaune.

"Tell us Jaune. How long have you been training?" He asked.

Jaune coughed, looking embarrassed.

"Er... About a year? Maybe two years?"

Dead silence. Jaune sighed.

"I know I'm not as good as I should be, but I'm trying as hard as I can," he said. He bowed his head. "If you have any suggestions or training that you think could help me? I would really appreciate it, please. I want to help my friends and protect people."

"Two years?!" Torg grunted. "You gotta be having us on, lad!"

Jaune shook his head, his bunny ears shaking.

"No, really. Just two years. Sorry if I'm really sloppy. Again, I'm working as hard as I can."

Ghira let out another laugh, and patted Jaune on the back.

"We'll happily train you, son! You're doing well, but it's good that you recognize you can always improve," he said with a nod. "Mistralian style, right?"

"Er, yeah," Jaune nodded, "Though I've been learning from some other friends, too, with different styles."

"Good, good," Ghira said with a nod. "Though, only two years? You entered a Hunter Academy with... No experience?"

Jaune nodded, looking ashamed.

"Yeah... My uh, my family didn't approve," he admitted. "Sorry. Again, working very hard to get better."

"Good, but really," Ghira said with a smile, "You're progressing very well. Go on. How about you join the men for the morning training?"

"Yes sir, thank you sir," Jaune said with a rapid nod. He followed the guards, who had not lost their sense of awe at the secret human. Ghira crossed his arms as he watched them go. Torg stood next to his chieftain, frowning in disbelief.

"Two years? That's all?" He gasped. "And that-that boy can take down a squad of our guards without so much as a scratch?!"

"The boy has potential. All of his friends do, apparently," Ghira chuckled.

"But... Is he stupid?"

"No," Ghira said, his eyes narrowed, "But I believe I will have words with his family at some point..."

 

[Ovid]

Kali's smirk gained teeth.

"That's when you bring out the claws."

Click to shrink...

Oh hey there Kali, so nice to see you as dangerous. Well, in fics other than CyanideSin's Fang Bus where Kali is a literal 4000 year old demigod of death who beheaded Hitler.

stupid?"

"No," Ghira said, his eyes narrowed, "But I believe I will have words with his family at some point..."

Click to shrink...

Papa Cat Ghira mode activated!

 

[AndrewJTalon]

LordofBones How would Kali conspire to get Jaune and Blake to bang in this universe?

Ovid The Queens of Kingdoms were seldom harmless in our own world, I have no doubt Kali Belladonna, while a kind, caring, and supportive mother, is also a badass in her own right. And the most likely person to teach Blake her ninja skills.

 

[Ovid]

Ovid The Queens of Kingdoms were seldom harmless in our own world, I have no doubt Kali Belladonna, while a kind, caring, and supportive mother, is also a badass in her own right. And the most likely person to teach Blake her ninja skills.[/QUOTE]

This is true. But it's still special, since I cant think of many queens who'd gut a bitch with what is effectively their bare hands. Sure, the claws kinda means she's cheating. But it does means she's quite literally gotten blood on her hands.

...oh goddangit. Freaking RT and their inconsistent worldbuilding. Aren't faunus supposed to only have trait? So it's unlikely Kali literally has claws. For a second there, I was picturing her with claws like Marvel's Sabertooth.

What's the point of a catgirl (MILF) if she doesnt have claws to go with her ears? Tails are nice too, but there's some adorable cats with short stubby tails.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Ovid The Queens of Kingdoms were seldom harmless in our own world, I have no doubt Kali Belladonna, while a kind, caring, and supportive mother, is also a badass in her own right. And the most likely person to teach Blake her ninja skills.

This is true. But it's still special, since I cant think of many queens who'd gut a bitch with what is effectively their bare hands. Sure, the claws kinda means she's cheating. But it does means she's quite literally gotten blood on her hands.

...oh goddangit. Freaking RT and their inconsistent worldbuilding. Aren't faunus supposed to only have trait? So it's unlikely Kali literally has claws. For a second there, I was picturing her with claws like Marvel's Sabertooth.

What's the point of a catgirl (MILF) if she doesnt have claws to go with her ears? Tails are nice too, but there's some adorable cats with short stubby tails.

Click to shrink...

Well, that's what fanfiction is for. Very lewd fanfiction.

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

"Next one, look sexy for Jaune!"

Blake flushed, but obeyed instinctively. A Shadow Clone emerged wearing a sexy, come hither smile, toying with her kimono to tease its contents.

"M-MOTHER!" Blake cried. Kali lightly slapped the back of her head with a bokken. "OW!"

Click to shrink...

Make Me a Grandmother no Jutsu!

"No," Ghira said, his eyes narrowed, "But I believe I will have words with his family at some point..."

Click to shrink...

Someone should!

As for how Kali might try to romantically entangle Blake & Jaune?

"Oh dear, your father and I can't make it to the dinner reservation that we had tonight! Why don't you and Jaune go instead?"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Make Me a Grandmother no Jutsu!




Someone should!

As for how Kali might try to romantically entangle Blake & Jaune?

"Oh dear, your father and I can't make it to the dinner reservation that we had tonight! Why don't you and Jaune go instead?"

Click to shrink...

I mean she might not be that blatant... Or perhaps she would be. Ninjas can be subtle, or they can just drop the pretense and blow stuff up. It's how they work, via the unexpected.

Of course, Jaune saving Blake's parents from assassination by her weird lesbian chameleon simp would further endear him to her. What else might?

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

Of course, Jaune saving Blake's parents from assassination by her weird lesbian chameleon simp would further endear him to her. What else might?

Click to shrink...

Jaune is really good at fishing.....

"I had to leave home with practically nothing, and squeeze every Lien that I could. That meant living off the land, lakes, rivers, and sea where I could! More tuna, anyone?"

 

[Blasterbot]

Ghira gets forced to take it easy for a day and goes fishing with Jaune. male bonding ensues as the reason to go fishing is actually just to drink beer and talk with a friend.

 

[Ovid]

Now that their runaway teenager daughter is back at home, and has a nice friend/possible suitor to look out for her, Kali and Ghira are under much less parental stress. They respond by getting very randy and start trying for another kitten. Across every surface of the house. Cue Blake blushing and/or disgusted by the fact her parents are fucking, and Jaune just going "eh, parents do that, you'll get over it. How do you think I got so many siblings?"

Another scene (that might be infringing a bit on the Uncle Jaune shtick) is that Jaune turns out to be great with the faunus kids of Menagerie, like a weird mix of "big kid" energy and "dad" energy. Blake doesn't understand why that is appealing to her. (To me, Blake doesn't seem like she's ready emotionally/mentally to have a kid. But her body and instincts think otherwise)

 

[Vicentehuerta777dragon]

I imagine the Beacon rumor mill suggests that Adrian is really Jaune's son and his sisters adopted him to care for him because the baby mama either died tragically or ran off on Jaune. Which has some fun potential.

Click to shrink...

Didn't you imply Adrian is jaunes son via sperm donor?

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Didn't you imply Adrian is jaunes son via sperm donor?

Click to shrink...

Yes but that was via sperm donation. Tanya's prank has it that Jaune got his heart broken by some no good downlow thot who left him a single dad and his sister and sister-in-law adopted Adrian because Jaune was too young to raise a child on his own. That's a different kind of drama!