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[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

An idea. A very terrible idea.

Jaune, Cardin, Sun and Neptune get fucking wasted one night and wake up to having somehow reinvented magic. Magic as in; when the Brother Gods were still around, kind of magic.

They don't understand any of the shit they wrote up, and they decide to just get rid of it. But Ozpin desperately tries to stop them, trying to bring them into his Inner Circle and get his hands on the formula to magic.

Based on this little thing I was randomly recommended on youtube:



I just thought it could make for a good chuckle.



Considering her clothes this is Beacon Zweisamkeit, who up till the dance hated Jaune's guts.

She's just a tsundere.

Ozpin: so why can't I remember my daughter's faces? When did they go from "my biggest motivation" to "another set of names on a list"?

OOF.

Ozpin needs a hug.

So does Salem, honestly.
 
Since I've dropped some sad have a not sad.


Valentines day is coming up and Nora is annoyed because Ren is completely ignoring all her signals and doesn't seem to have anything planned.

So to distract herself from her love woes she decides to go with the rest of the beacon girls to a surprise Valentines concert.

The new and mysterious boy and Hunterz4love is going to be throwing a concert in vale and rumor has it at least one of the members is going to be asking out a huntress and premiering a new song.

Which of the masked heartthrobs will it be? The dorky but friendly Knightlife? The Large tsundere Gingersnaps? Or the quiet and mysterious Lotus dragon?

Who knows but at least the new song Love Like Lightning sounds good.

(Edit: no relation to the real song love like Lightning. Think more love rock songs.)
 
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So there's loads of Jaune harem out there, and generally Ren and Nora are being monogamous in the background. What if you were to flip that?
Ren and Nora aren't dating because
A: "I value our friendship more"
B: "She's like a sister to me"
C: "I want to be in a stable financial position before making anything official"

And then Ren accidentally attracts the entirety of Team RWBY. He joins Blake's book club and helps make signs, he works out with Yang in the gym and shares shakes, he helps Weiss with Aura techniques for when enemies are in zero range, he asks Ruby for help designing a combined Stormflower with more stopping power. Because he isn't officially with Nora, RWBY decides that he's fair game!

The rest of Beacon takes on roles of shippers, with Jaune and Pyrrha being the monogamous neutral party Ren and Nora are usually relegated to.
 
A few more ideas:

-In a world like Remnant, there would likely be Dust rushes for large and newly discovered finds. This would fit into Cowboys of Remnant very well. So there could have been occasions where Nora and Ren might have packed up and headed to try and make some cash at some boomtown where Dust prospecting and mining is going on. And Cowboy Jaune could have run into crusty prospectors and so on.

-What if a human was adopted by Ghira and Kali as their child? A child orphaned in the Faunus Revolution and raised as an elder sibling to Blake? As a bonus reference, his name is Mowgli.

-As a final "Fuck You" to Jacques Schnee, old Nicholas Schnee, Weiss's grandfather, ensured that a marriage contract with a family that were old friends with him (and very honorable) was included in the prenup between Jacques and Willow for their children. So at least one of their children will have to marry a member of the Arc family.

-Pyrrha's shyness could hide many things... But an insatiable desire for battle? That's a new one. She wants Jaune to one day defeat her, so he can make her his and then they can fight the most glorious battles together!

-Nick Arc decides it's time to teach Jaune how to handle a railgun sword. Hoo boy...

-More ideas for Lines of Succession please!

-There are a lot of Drunken Marriage stories involving Jaune... How about a drunken marriage between Sun and Weiss? That's guaranteed to make Jacques blow a blood vessel.

-In a timeline where Jacques Schnee tried to (and is still trying to) take over Radian to establish his own Dust mining operations, Jaune Arc's reaction to Weiss Schnee is far more negative than in the canon. How does this effect things?

-Ruby Rose is blinded by a Grimm attack when she's young, but she learns to see the Aura thanks to her Silver Eyes still working (Just not with normal vision). How do things change?
 
-Ruby Rose is blinded by a Grimm attack when she's young, but she learns to see the Aura thanks to her Silver Eyes still working (Just not with normal vision). How do things change?
If she can see aura which are reflections of the soul, I imagine that she becomes someone that helps people that are joyful or stoic on the outside but hurting on the inside, a sorta therapist that helps people no matter who they are
 
-In a world like Remnant, there would likely be Dust rushes for large and newly discovered finds. This would fit into Cowboys of Remnant very well. So there could have been occasions where Nora and Ren might have packed up and headed to try and make some cash at some boomtown where Dust prospecting and mining is going on. And Cowboy Jaune could have run into crusty prospectors and so on.
Wouldn't Dust mining be very dangerous, seeing as it is, you know, HIGHLY EXPLOSIVE?
rwby.fandom.com/wiki/Dust said:
Dust can be found in two distinct states, crystalline and powdered. Dust, whether crystalline or powdered, is highly explosive.
So they would need specialised equipment, and it would be very carefull work, because a wrong move could trigger a chain reaction that could kill everyone in the mine at once.
This is also likely the part of reason why the Schnee Dust company is so successful in canon, as they would have the specialised equipment and transportation to make it much less dangerous then it would be for someone independent (thought some might still try just because the alure of getting rich is too attractive).

-Nick Arc decides it's time to teach Jaune how to handle a railgun sword. Hoo boy...
This brings up something interesting.
If they have electricity independant from Dust on Remnant, wouldn't that mean than any Rail/Coil/Gauss weapons be "Dustless" weapons?

Magnetic weapons would fire magnetic ammunition like Iron cobalt or nickel (or it uses a discarding sabot for Rail weapons), rather than dust, which could make the ammunition cheaper, but the weapon more expensive and somewhat less versitile (though specialised ammunition would solve that, but be more costly).

Also,
fantasy_railgun_sword_by_nano_core_dedhupu-pre.jpg
RWBY Weapon - The Peacemaker by Diyaru4500 on DeviantArt
ddtppuv-9cb5ea5c-f4d2-4cab-95b9-46376d9b8841.png
rwby__screaming_angel_by_rosenkruex_d85o2y7-fullview.jpg
FNXV9hOWQAAhKSQ

-Ruby Rose is blinded by a Grimm attack when she's young, but she learns to see the Aura thanks to her Silver Eyes still working (Just not with normal vision). How do things change?
latest
 
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A tarnished silver idea.

When Ruby first activates her silver eye power she gets some Grimm stuff in her eye before it dissipates and it causes her eyes to go through a interesting mutation.

Now instead of turning them to stone her silver eyes turn Grimm silver and put them under her control.
 
A tarnished silver idea.

When Ruby first activates her silver eye power she gets some Grimm stuff in her eye before it dissipates and it causes her eyes to go through a interesting mutation.

Now instead of turning them to stone her silver eyes turn Grimm silver and put them under her control.

Even better; it's a Rinnegan situation, and putting Dark (Black Blood) in Light (Silver Eyes) awakens the eyes of [The Origin].

So the Silver Eyes evolve into Rainbow Eyes, with the sclera becoming Black.

**There is also the implication that these are the same eyes The Blacksmith possesses, just that they are normally unseen**



EDIT: They look like this, just with black sclera

il_570xN.2294397578_89i7.jpg

il_fullxfull.1585622249_q5db.jpg

il_570xN.1585621409_igly.jpg
 
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If Ruby can see Aura and Jaune is a walking mountain of Aura, does that mean Jaune is blinding to look at or does he come off as more brother gods look? and if it's the later and Ruby lets it slip to Ozpin he might just be paranoid enough to send Qrow to shadow Jaune, the sisters misinterpret it as their uncle trying to scare off Jaune from forming a relationship with them (he's too much like Tai, like a younger version of him) and being rebellious teenagers they decide to go after Jaune, which in turn makes Qrow try to chase off Jaune becoming a self fulling prophesy kind of deal, Ozpin sees this as the Brothers agent (Jaune) trying to steal the Silver Eyes/ Xiao-Long bloodline from him or something to that affect, Cinder/Salem learn of this and jump to the same conclusions, shenanigans ensue.
 
If Ruby can see Aura and Jaune is a walking mountain of Aura, does that mean Jaune is blinding to look at or does he come off as more brother gods look? and if it's the later and Ruby lets it slip to Ozpin he might just be paranoid enough to send Qrow to shadow Jaune, the sisters misinterpret it as their uncle trying to scare off Jaune from forming a relationship with them (he's too much like Tai, like a younger version of him) and being rebellious teenagers they decide to go after Jaune, which in turn makes Qrow try to chase off Jaune becoming a self fulling prophesy kind of deal, Ozpin sees this as the Brothers agent (Jaune) trying to steal the Silver Eyes/ Xiao-Long bloodline from him or something to that affect, Cinder/Salem learn of this and jump to the same conclusions, shenanigans ensue.
Or something like this, where Ruby can't see Jaune's aura when she's close to him (like within 10 kilometers/6 miles). :p
 
If Ruby can see Aura and Jaune is a walking mountain of Aura, does that mean Jaune is blinding to look at or does he come off as more brother gods look? and if it's the later and Ruby lets it slip to Ozpin he might just be paranoid enough to send Qrow to shadow Jaune, the sisters misinterpret it as their uncle trying to scare off Jaune from forming a relationship with them (he's too much like Tai, like a younger version of him) and being rebellious teenagers they decide to go after Jaune, which in turn makes Qrow try to chase off Jaune becoming a self fulling prophesy kind of deal, Ozpin sees this as the Brothers agent (Jaune) trying to steal the Silver Eyes/ Xiao-Long bloodline from him or something to that affect, Cinder/Salem learn of this and jump to the same conclusions, shenanigans ensue.

He would look like an angel to her... In a good way. Pure, good, unblemished power. The rest of that would be hilarious.
 
-Ruby Rose is blinded by a Grimm attack when she's young, but she learns to see the Aura thanks to her Silver Eyes still working (Just not with normal vision). How do things change?

Ruby - "Huh, why does that woman have Aura from two people in her? And why does her arm look like a Grimm? I'd better go tell the Headmaster!"
 
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So I just thought of a way to combine five nights at Freddy's and RWBY that actually makes some amount of sense.

So atlas is the most technological kingdom. They most likely made the aura transfer pod that amber is in.

Penny is a robot capable of containing aura (yes she generates her own but it's somehow physically tied to her body).

Atlas would need a way to experiment and test these two technologies.

And it's well known that they're kinda shit heels to faunus so they probably used them for the rest subjects.

Ripping their souls out of their bodies and stuffing them into robots.

Maybe some of the robots escape and modify their bodies to have traits similar to their former faunus bodies.

....huh come to think of it rwby could probably also do a passable crossover with The Zeta Project....
 
I know I posted about Gunpowder weapons and Gasoline guzzlers that came first before Dust powered Guns and vehicles, but in that same type of thinking, I think Radio came first before CCT. Meaning at least well established Frontier towns would have radio stations and many Watchtowers act like relay points to Radio communications. Which would also explain how Frontier Towns can amass a Defense Force to combat a Grimm horde before Huntsmen arrive.

Hell, the Fallout Pipboy also makes sense as a predecessor to the Scroll in this sort of Deathworld.

Likewise, there were probably normal Generators and Batteries before Dust Generators and Dust Batteries became more mainstream. All this to mean, Railguns could have been a Great War Weapon series with the batteries and then expanded with Lightning Dust offering more power.

what do you think of all of this?
 
I know I posted about Gunpowder weapons and Gasoline guzzlers that came first before Dust powered Guns and vehicles, but in that same type of thinking, I think Radio came first before CCT. Meaning at least well established Frontier towns would have radio stations and many Watchtowers act like relay points to Radio communications. Which would also explain how Frontier Towns can amass a Defense Force to combat a Grimm horde before Huntsmen arrive.

Hell, the Fallout Pipboy also makes sense as a predecessor to the Scroll in this sort of Deathworld.

Likewise, there were probably normal Generators and Batteries before Dust Generators and Dust Batteries became more mainstream. All this to mean, Railguns could have been a Great War Weapon series with the batteries and then expanded with Lightning Dust offering more power.

what do you think of all of this?

Honestly, I don't see why there wouldn't be conventionally powered vehicles and weapons still in use across Remnant. The laws of physics and chemistry are largely close to ours and they clearly have plastics and other petroleum based products. Here's an infographic:

d97be96d46f6e4d1a21aab4e1e8ca04d.jpg


These are just a few of the things you get from oil. So yeah, even if Dust has taken the lead as a power source and a lot of other things, you're still gonna need oil for all these other substances. There's nothing wrong with that and it doesn't detract from the fantasy nature of Remnant. In fact it adds more depth and variety to it.
 
Cowboys of Remnant: The Caged Beast
- - -

Jaune wasn't a total barbarian. He did play video games, though not very seriously. Even so, he did have fun with them, and playing against Ruby was a great way to spend his free time... Even if she did kick his butt almost constantly.

Almost...

"Ha! Nngh! Grr...!" Jaune grinned as he mastered a combo and put Ruby's character down. "YEAH! KO!"

"Woah!" Ruby laughed, sitting back on the couch cushions. "Great going! You're actually remembering the combinations!"

Jaune smiled and nodded as his character in the fighting game posed for the victory cutscene. He reached his arms up over his head to stretch.

"Yep... I got mighty dexterous fingers," he said, holding up his hand and waving his fingers around.

"Guess you'd kind of have to with your revolvers and all," Ruby giggled.

A weight pressed against his back. Familiar arms wrapped around his chest from behind. A familiar voice whispered in his ear.

"Good to know your fingers are very agile and dexterous," Yang purred.

"ACK!" Jaune, red faced, gasped. Ruby scowled, pouting at her big sister.

"Yaaang!" Ruby groaned. "Stop messing with Jaune already! We're playing a video game!"

"Aw, I can't watch?" Yang pouted. She grinned at Ruby as she continued to hug on Jaune. "Who doesn't want to see a man show off his fingering skills?"

"NNGH!" Jaune's eyes crossed. Ruby grabbed onto Yang's shoulder and tugged hard.

"Nnngh! Yaaaang! Cut it out!"

Jaune's heart pounded in his ears. His hands twitched and shook.

Oh geez oh geez...!

No... No... Focus... Focus...! I am a man, and I'll solve this like a man!


Jaune took a very deep breath. He then slowly stood up from the couch, and closed his eyes.

"Miss Rose... Ruby... You mind giving us some privacy for a moment?" Jaune asked in a quiet, calm voice.

Yang blinked, a frown coming over her pretty face. Ruby blinked rapidly in confusion, and worried her lower lip.

"Are you sure Jaune-?"

"It's not a big deal. Won't take long," Jaune said, still in that calm, even voice as he stared away from them both. "We'll keep playing after, promise."

Ruby and Yang exchanged glances, but the sisters could not reach consensus. Nevertheless, Ruby nodded and smiled nervously as she walked to the RWBY dormroom. She opened the door and closed it shut behind her.

"So, wanted me all to yourself, huh Stud?" Yang teased, grinning a bit. Jaune slowly turned around, and pulled his hat on. It shadowed his eyes and his face. He walked around the couch, slow, sure, and confident. He walked up to Yang, who blinked in some shock at the determined look on his face.

"Miss Yang," Jaune began slowly, "You have been flirtin' and teasin' me near incessantly since we became friends."

He advanced on her, and Yang found herself walking backwards a step or two.

"Uh... Um... W-Well..."

She grinned with her usual bluster, getting right back on her game.

"There a problem with that, Stud? You don't like the attention...?"

She felt her shoulders hit the wall, and she jumped. She jumped again as Jaune slammed a hand right next to her head, his gaze never leaving her eyes. She shivered a bit at the intensity he was giving off. For the first time in a while, she didn't know what Jaune was going to do.

"That's the problem, Miss Yang," Jaune husked, "I do like the attention. But you don't seem to understand. The nature of men is predatory. We're like wolves, Miss Yang."

Yang's cheeks turned bright red, and she felt her own heart pound.

"O-Oh?"

"We gotta keep ourselves chained up and collared or else we'll just go wild and take what we want. Devour our prey," Jaune continued, his voice getting deeper. Yang could see the sweat on his brow as it dripped down his neck.

"And right now," Jaune stated, hard and serious, "You are makin' it mighty hard to keep that wolf chained up."

Yang licked her lips, and stared defiantly back at him.

"And what if I want that beast to come after me?" She asked in a heated whisper.

Jaune took a deep breath. She watched his chest expand behind his T-shirt, and traced the muscles with her eyes.

"What if I want to make that beast break free... And make me his prey~?"

She slowly reached out to rest a hand on his chest, and felt his warmth. She smirked up at him as he sucked in a breath through his nostrils like an incensed tiger. She loved it.

"What if I want you to just... Gobble me up~?"

Jaune opened his mouth... Before the door slammed open behind them. Jaune immediately yanked his hand away from the wall next to Yang's head, and Yang's own hands went together behind her back.

"Is everything all right in here?" Ruby asked with a suspicious expression on her face.

"Just fine!" Jaune said quickly.

"Oh yes," Yang giggled, "We just had some things to... Straighten out. Isn't that right, Jaune~?" She shot him a wink.

"Yes..." Jaune stated blandly, fighting another blush.

"So... Did you?" Ruby asked.

"Did we what?" Both blonds asked at the same time. Ruby sighed.

"Did you straighten those things out?"

"That remains to be seen," Jaune grunted, walking back to the couch to sit down again. He took up his controller... And blinked a bit as Yang sat next to him with a soft smile.

"But I'm sure we'll figure it out eventually," Yang said softly.

"I... I reckon we will," Jaune muttered. Ruby scowled a bit at how the two were sitting, and scooted herself up against Jaune.

"Pay attention to the game!" Ruby barked, "I'm gonna cream you!"

"Yes Miss Ruby," Jaune said, before shooting a glare at Yang. "Not one word."

"Wouldn't dream of it~," Yang chuckled softly.

- - -
 
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Cowboys of Remnant: Jaune and Ruby Make a Baby
Cowboys of Remnant: Jaune and Ruby Make a Baby

Weiss was certain that Ruby would forgive her for eavesdropping. After all, a good teammate should check in on their leader's status frequently, especially around ruggedly handsome blonds with strong hands and kind eyes and- Weiss stifled that line of thought with prejudice.

Besides, it's not as though no one else snooped. Those other snoopers snooped all the time, and had been snooping well before she arrived on the scene! She was, of course, referring to Pyrrha and Yang, currently crouched gauchely outside the forge booked by Jaune and Ruby. Weiss, like a woman of wealth and taste, had instead planted a discreet bug inside the room well before anyone else got there. She herself waited down the hall and around the corner, just in case she heard something that would require her to intervene.

Like whatever she was hearing right now.

"It's too big, Jaune! It won't fit!"

"We just need a little lube and it'll slide in just fine."

"It's not meant to open like that! You're gonna break it! Try a lower angle, that should give it more room- ah! Not that low! Careful!"

Jaune's grunt echoed from the speaker.

"Sorry, sorry. It's just a bit awkward, but it should fit once we find the right- ahh! See? Like butter," he replied.

"Oh wow, that's really snug."

"Yeah, gonna need to ream it out to make sure it fits better, I reckon."

Weiss couldn't believe what she was hearing. To think that sweet, innocent Ruby was engaging in such... depravity. It filled her with envy lust shock. Yes, definitely shock and nothing else. Enough was enough! She had to stop this!

The Heiress turned the corner, striding forward confidently. She paid no heed to the two degenerates at the door, sweeping past them and slamming the heavy metal door open.

"Stop your depravity this instant!" She cried.

The scene that met her was, in many ways, the polar opposite of what she had expected. Rather than a state of undress, Jaune and Ruby were instead clad head to toe in protective gear, obscuring their forms behind heavy aprons, gloves, and goggles. Between them, placed on a cooling stand, was Crocea Mors, fresh from the forge.

"Uh, hi Weiss," Ruby said, her voice muffled through the respirator covering her face. "I know I get a little too into my work sometimes but you don't need to call it depraved, you know. That's just hurtful."

"Miss Schnee." Jaune chimed in, voice filled with reproach. "If we hadn't already finished our work, you could have cause quite the accident. Forges are dangerous."

"You- But- What?"

Pyrrha cleared her throat, poking her head around the edge of the doorjamb. "It seems to me that Weiss believed the two of you were engaging in some sort of illicit activity." The redhead gave Weiss a pointed look. "And then took it upon herself to intervene."

"Not cool, Weiss." Yang added, leaning into view.

Weiss's face rapidly reddened with fury. "Well, I at least I wasn't crouching outside the door trying to eavesdrop like a voyeur! Have you two no shame!?"

Pyrrha blushed and stammered, "I-I was merely looking out for my partner!"

Yang, without a hint of shame, concurred. "And I was keeping an eye on my sister!"

"And I was doing the same for my partner and team leader!" Weiss retorted.

"And I don't need my sister and partner watching over me all the time!" Ruby interjected, anger seeping into her voice as she pulled her face protection off. "Seriously! We were just making a baby!"

There was silence as everyone turned to stare at her. A moment later, Ruby realized what she'd said and squeaked, attemping to, poorly, cover her hands with her recently removed mask.

Yang's grin could only be described as shit-eating. "Damn Cowboy, didn't think you had it in you to get my sis-" Her teasing was cut of as Pyrrha pulled her into a chokehold and dragged her around the corner. Judging from the look on the myrmidon's face, it would be a poor decision to interfere.

"What Ms. Rose meant," Jaune interrupted desperately. "Is that we were givin' Crocea Mors an overhaul! Nothin' untoward! Please, I really hope y'all wouldn't think of me as the kind of person who would take advantage of a friend like that..."

The Schnee Heiress's face fell as shame overwhelmed her. Jaune had been nothing but polite and kind to her and her new friends and she'd accused him of fooling around with her team leader. In retrospect, the conversation she'd overheard would have applied just as well to two individuals in the midst of precision weaponeering.

Weiss bowed. "Jaune, Ruby, I apologize. I shouldn't have jumped to such unseemly conclusions. Please forgive me."

"I- well," the Cowboy stuttered. "It's al-alright Miss Schnee. I know you were just lookin' out for us."

"Yeah!" Ruby agreed with cheer, her earlier ire and embarrassment all but forgotten. "It's nice to know that my bestie cares!"

The Heiress's eyelid twitched, but she took a deep breath and let it go, before searching for a way to change the subject. Her eyes alighted upon the cooling form of Crocea Mors and she had her out. "So, what exactly did you do to Jaune's sword?"

The little red reaper was suddenly vibrating with excitement. "Oh oh oh! It's the coolest thing! Jaune, can I show her? Please? Pretty please?"

Jaune chuckled, "Of course, Miss Rose. You did most of the work, after all."

"Yay!" Ruby cheered and seized Crocea Mors from the cooling stand. "Jaune wouldn't let me include all the upgrades I wanted to-"

"I much prefer simplicity, Miss Rose."

The redhead snorted, "You're just boring. At least the shifting mechanism is pretty neat." She lifted the blade up and gave it a few experimental swings, showing off the changes.

Initially a fairly straightforward hand-and-a-half sword, Crocea Mors had undergone some extensive changes to its form. The blade itself was split down the middle, giving it a prong shape, to accommodate the barrel of the lever action rifle that had been integrated with the body of the sword. The receiver of the gun was built-into the hilt of the blade, although the trigger and cocking lever weren't exactly positioned for easy usage. Weiss's unasked question was answered as Ruby engaged the mechashift, rotating the prongs of the blade ninety degrees while retracting them, flipping the crossguard upwards, and sliding the trigger and lever into place in her hand. It now more closely resembled a rifle with longsword components attached although Weiss could see that it could still be used as a melee weapon, albeit one more similar to a cleaver. With another twist of Ruby's hand, the blade reverted back to its split longsword configuration.

"Pretty neat, huh?" Ruby said with a grin.

"I suppose," Weiss answered hesitantly. "It's certainly a rather straight-forward solution. Why the sudden need for a change though, Jaune?"

"Well, Miss Schnee," Jaune replied, in the process of taking his protective gear off. "Crocea Mors just wasn't cuttin' it no more." He paused, a sheepish expression crossing his face. "No pun intended."

Weiss's eyelid twitched again.

"You've seen that I much prefer to keep my distance when I fight," Jaune continued, unmindful of the white-haired girl's ire. "Course, plenty of my opponents, Grimm or not, prefer to get all up close an' personal. I was having trouble swappin' between my guns and my blade in a timely fashion, so I figured it was time to adapt. And, well, Ruby had been beggin' me to let her help with forgin' a new weapon so I decided to kill two Nevermores with one bullet."

"Yeah!" Ruby cheered. "And Crocea Mors was waaay overdue for an upgrade! Don't get me wrong, it's a great weapon but it's old. The spine was just about ready to go and the tang was already cracked!"

"The grip was makin' a weird rattlin' noise," Jaune murmured.

"Yep!" Ruby continued. "So, we melted the old girl down, I put together a gun in the style Jaune's used to, and then put them together! I wanted to add some stuff to the shield too, maybe some Dust circuits or a hardlight projector, but that kept getting shot down." The young weaponeer pouted.

The Cowboy sighed in a long-suffering manner that Weiss had become intimately familiar with herself, "Miss Rose, please, I want to keep things as simple as can be."

"But you could have used it to glide or shoot Dust blasts!"

The flat look Jaune shot Ruby dissuaded any further whining.

"I still modified the shield so the rifle can be fired while the sword is sheathed," the redhead added. "That was a little challenging, keeping the folding mechanism intact, but it works like a dream!" She picked up the scabbard from a nearby workbench and sheathed the blade before handing them both to Jaune. "Here's your new baby!"

The blond flushed. "M-miss Rose, please don't say it like that."

Ruby's face soon matched her friend's, "Sorry! It-it's a habit! I just really care about my bab- my creations! Yeah, my creations! They're special to me!"

Weiss decided to be magnanimous and rescue her partner from her embarrassment via a distraction. "It seems to me that you'll need to test the modifications out, Jaune."

"I reckon so, Miss Schnee." Jaune murmured absently, checking his weapon over.

"Would you care to join me for a spar?"

The Cowboy looked up, mild surprise writ across his face before giving her a wide grin. "I'd be honored, Miss Schnee."

Weiss returned the smile and very pointedly ignored the venomous look Ruby was shooting her over Jaune's shoulder.
 
Pyrrha's Innocence
Pyrrha and Jaune had returned to the dormroom after enough training session on the roof. Jaune groaned a bit as Pyrrha helped support him through the door into the dorm.

"Thanks Pyrrha," Jaune managed, "Ugh... I feel like I got hit by a truck."

Pyrrha blushed then smiled.

"Um, sorry..."

"No! No, that's good," Jaune said with a nod, "No pain... Ugh... No gain, r-right?"

"Well, I wouldn't say that's entirely untrue," Pyrrha said gently, "Though you have been getting a lot better."

"Yay," Jaune sighed. Pyrrha smiled encouragingly at him.

"No, really! You have improved a LOT!" She said happily. "You shouldn't be so hard on yourself."

"Trying, but it's how I've been since I can remember," Jaune sighed. They stopped in front of Jaune's bed. Pyrrha frowned deeply, studying the bed carefully. Jaune looked at her, and then back at the bed.

"Uh... You okay Pyr?" He asked. Pyrrha flushed and nodded quickly.

"O-Oh! Yes! J-Just fine! Um... Hmm..."

Jaune cast about in his mind for things that might bother Pyrrha.

His bed was spic and span, he made it properly every morning... That couldn't be it... So...

He decided to take a shot in the dark.

"Is it about the Dance?" Jaune asked. Pyrrha turned bright red.

"Um, er, uh... S-Sort of?" She managed. Jaune blinked.

Damn. She looked cute when she was nervous. It was nice to see, to be honest. Sure, she was gorgeous, but this felt more... Real, somehow.

"Well, don't worry about it," Jaune said with a grin, "You'll gonna have to beat the boys off with Milo! So many of them are going to want to ask you out!"

Pyrrha fidgeted and looked aside.

"Oh... Um... Y-Yeah, you bet," she murmured quietly.

Jaune frowned.

"What, you think otherwise?"

"It's just... Um... Well, the big reason is that uh... I-I mean... I think I intimidate a lot of people," she admitted.

Jaune stared.

"Really? I..." He thought about it. "Oh... Um, I guess that makes sense. You being a celebrity and all."

"Y-yeah," Pyrrha said quietly, "You... You're one of the few people I've met who can actually... Y-You know... Talk to me like I'm a person."

Jaune smiled widely.

"Well, you are. To me. A great person!"

Pyrrha's cheeks burned an even brighter red. She seemed a bit unsteady. Concerned, Jaune forgot about his fatigue and reached out to her.

"Pyr? You okay-?"

"EEP!"

Pyrrha tried to move her foot forward, while Jaune moved his back. She grabbed hold of his hand and he was pulled forward as he remembered how tired he was. The end result of this lack of coordination was predictable if you've ever watched romcom anime.

"ACK!"

"EEEP!"

Jaune landed on his bed, on his back. The pain of his aching muscles was again forgotten as Pyrrha laid on top of him. Her wide green eyes stared into his wide blue ones as she perched atop him.

Her face soon turned as red as her hair, and her lip wobbled. Jaune took a deep breath to calm himself.

After all, this was his friend Pyrrha. They'd just fallen together. Nevermind his rapidly beating heart or his red cheeks, he was not going to freak out. Not when Pyrrha looked close to tears.

"Pyrrha, are you okay?" He asked.

Pyrrha sobbed, and fell off the bed onto the floor. Bewildered and terrified, Jaune knelt down with her.

"Pyrrha? Pyrrha, what is it?! Are you all right?!"

"Oh noooo... I'm... I'm..." She sobbed. "I'M A SLUT!"

Jaune blinked. Of all the things he had ever expected Pyrrha Nikos to say, that was... That wasn't in the top one hundred things he'd anticipate. Hell, it wasn't in the top thousand. It may as well not even be on the list!

"H-Huh?" Jaune managed, his jaw dropped. Pyrrha sniffled, and wiped her eyes. She looked up at him pleadingly.

"This... This isn't how I wanted it to go... B-But... You're a good man, Jaune. I-I know you are! You... You'd forgive the mother of your child for being... Being loose, r-right?!"

"My what?!" Jaune exclaimed, falling back in his crouch and slamming back into the bunk. Pyrrha continued to weep.

"I swear Jaune, I'll be the best wife you ever could ask for! I-I'll do anything you want! The-The most lewd, depraved things imaginable! I'll-I'll have twenty of your children if you wanted! I'll financially support us-!"

"WOAH WOAH WOAH!" Jaune cried, gettiing his rapidly stampeding thoughts all together into something approaching calm, before he grabbed her hands between his. He looked her in the eyes.

"Pyrrha?! What are you talking about?!" He demanded.

Pyrrha sniffled.

"I... I laid on a bed with a boy! That means... I'm pregnant now!"

Jaune blinked. He blinked again. He blinked a third time.

"I... Wha... You think... That's how it works?" He asked in utter disbelief.

Pyrrha sobbed again, and nodded.

"Isn't it?"

Jaune stared at her for a long time... Before he snickered.

"Hahaha! Oh, that's a great one, Pyr! I'm so glad you've loosened up enough to joke! Haaa... Wow, that is unconventional but... Y-yeah! You as a sheltered girl, not knowing... HAHAHAHA! Oh wow, you got me! That's hilarious!"

Pyrrha continued to sniffle, looking uncomprehendingly at Jaune. Jaune slowly stopped laughing.

"... You... You are joking... Right?"

Pyrrha huffed, and looked aside.

"I-I can't believe you're treating our child as a joking matter, Jaune!" Pyrrha sniffled again. "How could you?! What-What kind of a man are you? To-To just have a girl in your bed and then treat her like a joke!"

The door was opened. Ruby and Weiss entered, with Blake looking in curiously. Ruby looked concerned while Weiss frowned deeply.

"Is everything all right?" Ruby asked.

"What did you do, Arc?! You made Pyrrha cry!" Weiss growled.

Jaune opened his mouth but for once, Pyrrha interrupted him.

"I'm pregnant and he thinks it's a joke!"

"YOU'RE WHAT?!" Ruby and Weiss shrieked. Blake's jaw dropped as her hair bow perked right up.

Jaune slapped a hand over his face and sighed.

It's gonna be a long night...

- - -


Pyrrha Nikos was never taught about the birds and the bees thanks to her overprotective mother. Pyrrha had to piece things together, but between the cybernanny on her devices and how isolated she's been socially (as well as her private schooling), she has no idea about basic biology.

Poor Jaune.
 

Jaune: YANG! GET OVER HERE!!!

Yang: Geez VB, did you have to scream so loud?

Jaune: Yes. Yes I did. I don't mind explaining the Birds and the Bees to Pyrrha (I got four younger sisters, I know how this goes); but I draw the line at me, a guy, having to explain to a girl just why blood keeps coming out of her hoo-hah once every month.

Yang:......*snnrk* Hoo-hah.
 
Pyrrha Nikos was never taught about the birds and the bees thanks to her overprotective mother. Pyrrha had to piece things together, but between the cybernanny on her devices and how isolated she's been socially (as well as her private schooling), she has no idea about basic biology.

Poor Jaune.

Next up, handholding, such lewdness Pyrrha has never known!
 
Oh god the fallout of that is gonna be hilarious. And will quite possibly end up with Jaune having a broken dick once Pyhrra gets ahold of an unmonitored scroll.

Potentially... But there's also another possibility:

Ruby and Weiss also think that's how you make babies.

Blake knows better but she's gonna stir the pot because it's hilarious.
 
. . . . holy frak, Jaune is going to go Full "Smug brat needs discipline" mode on Yang and Blake!

edit, I don't mean it in a NSFW way, but in a "Jaune is fed up with the shitstirrers, thy punishment is disciplination" type of deal.
 
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More Innocence
Blake: "That's not the only method to make babies. Remember that time during Initiation when he caught you, Weiss?"

Weiss: "W-W-W-WHAT!?"

Blake: Smug "Congratulations."

Ruby: "W-WAIT! WE'VE SAT ON THE SAME BED BEFORE PLAYING VIDEO GAMES! OH NOOO...!"

Blake: "Oh yes. You've been very busy, haven't you Jaune?"

Jaune: "No, wait, that's not what-!"

Pyrrha: "YOU HUSSY!"

Ruby: "I-I"M NOT A HUSSY! Oh, Jaune, please! We're besties, r-right? You'd never abandon me in my time of need?"

Jaune: "Of course not but-!"

Weiss: "BACK OFF! CLEARLY I'M THE ONE HE'S GOING TO MARRY AND TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR! N-NOT YOU HARLOTS!"

Jaune: "Wait what?!"

Pyrrha: "YOU DON'T EVEN LIKE HIM!"

Weiss: "WELL HE'S GONNA TAKE RESPONSIBILITY AND I'M NOT SHARING!"

Ruby: "THAT'S NOT FAIR, WEISS! HE'S MY BEST FRIEND!"

Weiss: "Well he liked me first!"

Pyrrha: *bright red* "W-WELL I'VE BEEN IN LOVE WITH HIM SINCE THE DAY WE MET! I-I'VE HAD TO HOLD MYSELF BACK BECAUSE I WAS SAVING MYSELF FOR MARRIAGE!"

Weiss: "HA! You're the one who unlocked his Aura! You're clearly just a slut!"

Pyrrha: "ME?! Y-You-You-You treat men like dirt and then treat them nice! You-You-WHORE!"

Weiss: "BITCH!"

Ruby: "TRAITOR! WE'RE PARTNERS!"

Weiss: "NOT WHEN IT COMES TO THIS!"

Jaune: "Nonono hold on! HOLD ON! Let's all calm down..." *He sits on the bed with a sigh... Notices someone is holding his hand and sitting next to him. He looks to his side* "... Blake?"

Weiss, Pyrrha and Ruby: "BLAKE?!"

Blake: faux blush, hands over her cheeks "Oh noooo. I'm pregnant toooo! You really are quite the playboy aren't you Jaune?"

Weiss: "YOU-YOU HORNY NO GOOD ALLEY CAT!"

Pyrrha: "HOW COULD YOU JAUNE?! ANOTHER?!"

Ruby: sobs "HE'S INSATIABLE!"

Jaune: "BLAKE!"

Blake: holding back her laughter with immense difficulty "Please be gentle~?"
 

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