The Arc Clan: Yang and Ruby's Aunt Xianpu (Final)
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AndrewJTalon
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Yang lounged in her infirmary bed, a patchwork of bruises and bandages doing little to dim her smirk as she eyed Jaune next door. For once, he was the one laid up—and grinning like he'd just won the lottery. The sterile scent of antiseptic hung in the air, undercut by the faint tick of a wall clock, counting down to whatever fresh hell was about to descend. Their spar had been a disaster for her: a ring-out after Jaune's cheeky distraction about her hair catching fire. But damn if it wasn't hilarious in hindsight.
"Geez… a ring-out, huh, Stud?" Yang teased, her lilac eyes sparkling despite the throb in her ribs.
Jaune rubbed his cheek nervously, sheepish but proud. "It was the only thing I could think of to beat you… I-I know it doesn't work in real life, and I still need to work on offense. Honestly, it should've been a draw—my Aura was this low—"
Yang reached over and bonked him on the head. "OW!"
"Enough of that," she said, smirking. "You won. Take the W."
Jaune smiled, soft and genuine. "...Thanks, Yang…"
"Seriously," Yang added, propping herself up. "I'm #2 in our grade. You're, what, bottom 2? Yet you still got the win. Just be happy, and someday you'll make it consistent."
Jaune's grin widened. "Thanks, Yang…"
"Seriously though," she said, narrowing her eyes playfully, "distracting me by saying my hair caught fire was a crap move. I'll punch you for that later."
Jaune gulped. "Yeah…"
"I'd be doing a lot worse if you'd actually hit me with that Aura Slash," Yang said, eyebrow arched as though she could read his mind. "Where'd you learn that?"
"Aunt Mordred and Nana Arturia," Jaune replied. "They'll teach you too if you ask."
Yang snorted. "Yeah, me with the sword I always carry around, going to be doing soooo many slashes."
"You can also send out Aura pulses," Jaune said with a grin, "Like you can punch from across the room."
Yang considered the possibilities and winked at him.
"Well, as my fiancée, I suppose I should learn the family techniques."
Jaune gave her a wry look.
Yang continued, batting her lashes. "Oh, of course, dear hubby. Once we're out of here, maybe you can let me have a swing with your family sword—we can go a round or two. Maybe you could even slay the mighty dragon of Beacon."
Jaune blushed beet red. "S-Seriously! Bad enough Blake pulled that! You have to keep it up?! All my relatives think I'm a playboy!" he groaned.
Yang's grin sharpened. "I'm sorry, what did Blake do…?" She narrowed her eyes. "Jaune, what did she do?"
Jaune sighed, rubbing his face. "Her aunt showed up and she claimed I was her fiancé… and that I'd gotten her pregnant. Ahem…"
"Wait, what?! Lilac wasn't teasing?!" Yang demanded.
Jaune shook his head. Yang's eyes glowed red.
"Is she?" Yang asked, voice dangerously low.
"Is she wha-Pregnant?!" Jaune yelped. "What?! NO! She's crazy, you all know that!"
"Good," Yang said, cracking her knuckles. "So I won't feel bad for punching a pregnant woman."
Jaune leaned back and shrugged, less tense. He smiled at her.
"Well… if it helps," Jaune said, "my fake engagement with you means way more to me than my fake one with her."
Yang blushed, cooing despite herself. "Aww, that's so sweet… We are definitely going to find a way to break that engagement."
Jaune sighed again. "Bad enough Pyrrha…"
Jaune gulped as Yang turned her glare back on him.
"What?"
"Um, well, her aunt kind of… sort of… demanded I take her on a date? Or she'd stab me?"
"Her too?!" Yang groaned.
The door burst open, and Ruby bounded in with a big, happy smile. "Hey, guys!"
"Hey!" Jaune said.
"Yo," Yang added.
"So… Pyrrha is uh…" Ruby started, just as a few battered upperclassmen shuffled in, guided by a smiling Pyrrha.
"Sorry," Pyrrha said sweetly. "They insinuated that Yang went down to Jaune for… uncouth reasons. And then they fell down some stairs." The upperclassmen nodded hurriedly.
Nora hefted her hammer. "Yeah! STAIRS!"
Ren coughed politely.
"Aww, that's so sweet," Yang said. "Thanks for not letting your aunt stab my fiancé, by the way. Means a lot."
Pyrrha flushed, scowling at Yang.
Jaune scowled, disapproving. "Guys…"
Nora blinked. "Ummm… I mean, they implied you were also doing 'uncouth' things with the other girls. And said your sister was super hot!"
Jaune stilled, his face like stone. "...Did they?"
One of the upperclassmen coughed and spoke quickly.
"Y-yeah! She was really hot, bro! The hottest!"
Jaune's glare became so intense the upperclassmen shrank back. Yang joined him, her smile savage.
"…What stairs did you say they fell down again?" She asked.
The upperclassmen shrank back. Jaune then took a deep breath.
"No, no," Jaune said, voice steel. "One set of stairs is enough. But if they talk like that again… we'll have to find the stairs again. Make sure they can go down them safely."
The upperclassmen nodded frantically and retreated. Weiss and Blake entered, Weiss sighing dramatically.
"It was not for your sake, Arc," Weiss said. "I believe ruffians deserve to be taught manners."
"Ah… hello, Jaune. My beloved. How are you doing?" Blake purred, sitting on his lap.
"Ack! Blake!" Jaune cried.
"Stuff it, cat," Yang snapped. "We all know it's fake."
Blake coughed.
"Well... I could change that-"
"No!" Jaune said quickly. Blake looked a bit hurt and slid off his lap. "I mean... It's just for your parents, right?"
"R-Right... Still... We could practice," Blake suggested, her voice again soft and sultry.
Ruby growled, her cheeks red.
"Blake! Stop being all weird and horny!"
Yang's Semblance flickered, her hair igniting slightly. Pyrrha's eyes narrowed.
"I wonder… do cats always land on their feet?" Yang mused. "Weiss, you know where the stairs are, right?"
Nora grinned and waved her hand eagerly.
"Ooh! Ooh! Can I play fake fiancée to Jaune next?! Looks like fun!"
Ren twitched. Jaune held up his hands immediately.
"NORA! I would never!"
Ren immediately relaxed. Nora giggled and playfully punched Jaune's shoulder, which made him wince.
"I was just kidding, ya silly! Hee! Now… maybe if you and Ren fused…"
Yang grinned.
"I mean, I guess sharing with Nora isn't the worst then…"
Weiss sighed, glaring at Jaune. "You're an agent of absolute chaos."
"Me?!"
"Guys, we appreciate the visit," Yang said pointedly at Blake and Pyrrha, "but my fiancé and I need rest. So could you give us some space?"
CRASH! A wall exploded inward, dust and debris flying as a beautiful, stacked woman with light purple hair in a flowing Mistralian dress burst through dramatically.
"NEE HAO!" She declared, striking a pose.
Weiss, Blake, Pyrrha and Ren all reached for their weapons, while Nora grinned. Ruby and Jaune gasped as Yang groaned.
"AUNTIE SHAMPOO?!" Ruby cried.
Shampoo beamed. "RUBY!" She swept Ruby into a bone-crushing hug.
"Oh no… Auntie Shampoo," Yang groaned, slumping back.
Weiss rolled her eyes.
"So it's not just Arc with the weird family members."
Blake nodded.
"Yeah… with the Schnees, it's you."
Weiss flushed.
"SHUT UP!"
Shampoo released Ruby from her hug, her violet eyes narrowing with concern as she turned to Yang. "Oh! Sorry! How you get injured?" She rummaged in her satchel and thrust a glowing vial at her. "Here! Potion! Alleviate pain!"Yang took it offhandedly, popping the cork and downing a swig. She instantly felt better and she smiled at her aunt.
"Spar with my fiancé…" Her eyes widened. Oh crap!
Shampoo's head snapped up. "FIANCE?!"
Ruby winced and laughed awkwardly.
"Ummmm…"
Weiss smirked, relishing the chaos. "Oh yes… I suppose she didn't tell you."
Yang stammered, her face heating up. "I-uh…"
Pyrrha and Blake both twitched. Their glares could've melted steel. Ren hid a smirk.
Nora, oblivious and beaming, pointed dramatically at Jaune. "YEAH! That's her fiancé right there! My team leader, Jaune!"
Jaune waved weakly.
"U-Uh… hello, ma'am?"
"Didn't Granny Xiao-Long tell you?" Weiss added mercilessly.
"Weiss!" Ruby hissed.
Shampoo scowled, stalking over to Jaune's bed like a predator sizing up prey. She poked him hard in the ribs.
"Ow!" Jaune yelped, flinching.
"AUNTIE! Leave him alone!" Yang barked, sitting up despite her bruises.
"Yeah!" Ruby chimed in, puffing out her chest. "He's my best friend! And maybe my fian-"
"AND NOTHING MORE!" Yang added hastily, her cheeks flaming.
"He could be!" Ruby growled.
Shampoo gave Jaune a very skeptical look, her eyes sharp as knives.
"Hmmmm… He any good?"
Yang shrugged, playing it cool(ish).
"Well, he beat me, soooo…"
"And he's a very good team leader!" Pyrrha added, gaining a smile from Jaune. She blushed happily, disregarding the irritated looks she got from Yang, Blake and Ruby.
Weiss nodded.
"He's in the bottom quarter of the class and a near complete loser… but he did manage to defeat Yang."
Jaune winced. Yang scowled.
"Ok, Weiss Cream," Yang drawled, her lilac eyes glinting, "that first part was unnecessary."
Blake scowled harder, her ears twitching under her bow like they were about to launch. Pyrrha's smile was a bit tense.
Weiss huffed, chin high.
"It's very necessary!"
Yang smirked, leaning in. "Weiss, you almost lose to him every time, and you've had years of training. He just tanks everything you throw at him."
Shampoo considered this, while Weiss sputtered. "I don't ALMOST lose! Especially not to the Deadlast!"
"You really do," Pyrrha observed.
Weiss scowled.
Shampoo tilted her head curiously. "What? He dead last and work his way up?"
Jaune straightened, cheeks flushing but voice steady. "Y-Yes, ma'am! I… I wasn't very good to start, but I've put a lot of effort into getting better and my friends help me a lot!"
Shampoo tilted her head.
"Why?"
Jaune met her gaze, earnest as ever.
"Because I… I want to be a great Huntsman. Like my parents. And to protect people."
Shampoo hummed. "Hmmm…"
She circled Jaune again, then nodded approvingly.
"Good person."
Yang beamed, waving her off. "See? Good person. Stop poking him now, Auntie."
Shampoo poked his cheek one last time. She raised an eyebrow.
"He goof."
"Wow, she's good!" Nora gasped. Jaune coughed, but shrugged.
"…Yes…"
Shampoo hummed and smiled fondly.
"Like my brother," she added.
Jaune blinked. "I uh…"
Ruby tilted her head, silver eyes sparkling. "Huh! He is a little like Dad…"
Oh Breaker, Yang thought, freezing. If they say I have a complex…
Blake smirked, catching Yang's panic… And blushing a bit, since she was into that sort of thing.
Jaune, oblivious, sputtered: "I-I wouldn't know… But I hope it's a good thing?"
Shampoo nodded sagely.
"Good! Marry boy like good dad, have good marriage. Marry boy like bad dad, have bad marriage." She sighed dramatically.
"Marry idiot jerk, have idiotic jerk marriage," she added, bitter and unhappy.
Yang blinked, then snorted. "I… guess that checks out?"
Shampoo nodded and beamed.
"Strong aura! Good heart! Beat strongest warrior? Very good!" She grinned, slapping Jaune on the back hard enough to rattle his IV stand. "You marry Yang! Then Ruby too!"
Jaune gaped. "Ghk—! W-what?!"
"YAY!" Ruby cheered.
"Over my dead body, Auntie!" Yang snarled. Ruby scowled.
"Yaaang!"
Pyrrha's hand twitched toward Milo. "I… second that."
Blake's ears flattened. "Third."
Nora grinned.
"Fourth! Wait, can I be fifth? Group hug marriage sounds amazing! But only if Renny is involved!"
Ren just sighed.
"Nora…"
The door—the actual door—burst open with a bang, and Glynda Goodwitch stormed in, riding crop in hand, her glasses flashing with fury.
"What the—MRS. SAOTOME! What are you doing?! Are you aware we have DOORS?!"
Shampoo spun, grinning like a cat with cream. "Hello, Unmarried Professor."
Glynda twitched angrily. Shampoo's grin grew just a bit.
"You fix everything, don't you?" Shampoo teased, hands on hips. "Hmph!"
Glynda's eye twitched harder, her voice a whip-crack.
"…I believe you'll be leaving with your family members before I make MORE holes I'll have to fix."
Shampoo started forward, muscles flexing—then sighed, slumping playfully.
"…Fine. We go." She scooped Ruby into a hug, spinning her once. She then hugged Yang again. "Little Red Reaper! Little Dragon! Visit soon! Bring husband-candidate!"
She winked at Jaune, who turned beet red.
Ruby squealed.
"Yay! Bye, Auntie Shampoo!"
"S-Sure!" Yang managed.
Shampoo blew kisses to everyone—lingering extra long on Jaune—then vaulted out the window anyway, because doors were for amateurs. Glass shattered faintly outside, followed by a cheerful "NEE HAO!" echoing across campus.
Glynda pinched her nose, aura flaring to seal the wall again. She glared at Jauen and Yang.
"Arc… Xiao Long… Rest. Or I'll make you."
"Yes ma'am," the students chorused. Glynda turned and stalked out angrily. Nora pouted.
"Aww, group hug over already? Next time, I crash through the wall!"
Ren just sighed.
"Geez… a ring-out, huh, Stud?" Yang teased, her lilac eyes sparkling despite the throb in her ribs.
Jaune rubbed his cheek nervously, sheepish but proud. "It was the only thing I could think of to beat you… I-I know it doesn't work in real life, and I still need to work on offense. Honestly, it should've been a draw—my Aura was this low—"
Yang reached over and bonked him on the head. "OW!"
"Enough of that," she said, smirking. "You won. Take the W."
Jaune smiled, soft and genuine. "...Thanks, Yang…"
"Seriously," Yang added, propping herself up. "I'm #2 in our grade. You're, what, bottom 2? Yet you still got the win. Just be happy, and someday you'll make it consistent."
Jaune's grin widened. "Thanks, Yang…"
"Seriously though," she said, narrowing her eyes playfully, "distracting me by saying my hair caught fire was a crap move. I'll punch you for that later."
Jaune gulped. "Yeah…"
"I'd be doing a lot worse if you'd actually hit me with that Aura Slash," Yang said, eyebrow arched as though she could read his mind. "Where'd you learn that?"
"Aunt Mordred and Nana Arturia," Jaune replied. "They'll teach you too if you ask."
Yang snorted. "Yeah, me with the sword I always carry around, going to be doing soooo many slashes."
"You can also send out Aura pulses," Jaune said with a grin, "Like you can punch from across the room."
Yang considered the possibilities and winked at him.
"Well, as my fiancée, I suppose I should learn the family techniques."
Jaune gave her a wry look.
Yang continued, batting her lashes. "Oh, of course, dear hubby. Once we're out of here, maybe you can let me have a swing with your family sword—we can go a round or two. Maybe you could even slay the mighty dragon of Beacon."
Jaune blushed beet red. "S-Seriously! Bad enough Blake pulled that! You have to keep it up?! All my relatives think I'm a playboy!" he groaned.
Yang's grin sharpened. "I'm sorry, what did Blake do…?" She narrowed her eyes. "Jaune, what did she do?"
Jaune sighed, rubbing his face. "Her aunt showed up and she claimed I was her fiancé… and that I'd gotten her pregnant. Ahem…"
"Wait, what?! Lilac wasn't teasing?!" Yang demanded.
Jaune shook his head. Yang's eyes glowed red.
"Is she?" Yang asked, voice dangerously low.
"Is she wha-Pregnant?!" Jaune yelped. "What?! NO! She's crazy, you all know that!"
"Good," Yang said, cracking her knuckles. "So I won't feel bad for punching a pregnant woman."
Jaune leaned back and shrugged, less tense. He smiled at her.
"Well… if it helps," Jaune said, "my fake engagement with you means way more to me than my fake one with her."
Yang blushed, cooing despite herself. "Aww, that's so sweet… We are definitely going to find a way to break that engagement."
Jaune sighed again. "Bad enough Pyrrha…"
Jaune gulped as Yang turned her glare back on him.
"What?"
"Um, well, her aunt kind of… sort of… demanded I take her on a date? Or she'd stab me?"
"Her too?!" Yang groaned.
The door burst open, and Ruby bounded in with a big, happy smile. "Hey, guys!"
"Hey!" Jaune said.
"Yo," Yang added.
"So… Pyrrha is uh…" Ruby started, just as a few battered upperclassmen shuffled in, guided by a smiling Pyrrha.
"Sorry," Pyrrha said sweetly. "They insinuated that Yang went down to Jaune for… uncouth reasons. And then they fell down some stairs." The upperclassmen nodded hurriedly.
Nora hefted her hammer. "Yeah! STAIRS!"
Ren coughed politely.
"Aww, that's so sweet," Yang said. "Thanks for not letting your aunt stab my fiancé, by the way. Means a lot."
Pyrrha flushed, scowling at Yang.
Jaune scowled, disapproving. "Guys…"
Nora blinked. "Ummm… I mean, they implied you were also doing 'uncouth' things with the other girls. And said your sister was super hot!"
Jaune stilled, his face like stone. "...Did they?"
One of the upperclassmen coughed and spoke quickly.
"Y-yeah! She was really hot, bro! The hottest!"
Jaune's glare became so intense the upperclassmen shrank back. Yang joined him, her smile savage.
"…What stairs did you say they fell down again?" She asked.
The upperclassmen shrank back. Jaune then took a deep breath.
"No, no," Jaune said, voice steel. "One set of stairs is enough. But if they talk like that again… we'll have to find the stairs again. Make sure they can go down them safely."
The upperclassmen nodded frantically and retreated. Weiss and Blake entered, Weiss sighing dramatically.
"It was not for your sake, Arc," Weiss said. "I believe ruffians deserve to be taught manners."
"Ah… hello, Jaune. My beloved. How are you doing?" Blake purred, sitting on his lap.
"Ack! Blake!" Jaune cried.
"Stuff it, cat," Yang snapped. "We all know it's fake."
Blake coughed.
"Well... I could change that-"
"No!" Jaune said quickly. Blake looked a bit hurt and slid off his lap. "I mean... It's just for your parents, right?"
"R-Right... Still... We could practice," Blake suggested, her voice again soft and sultry.
Ruby growled, her cheeks red.
"Blake! Stop being all weird and horny!"
Yang's Semblance flickered, her hair igniting slightly. Pyrrha's eyes narrowed.
"I wonder… do cats always land on their feet?" Yang mused. "Weiss, you know where the stairs are, right?"
Nora grinned and waved her hand eagerly.
"Ooh! Ooh! Can I play fake fiancée to Jaune next?! Looks like fun!"
Ren twitched. Jaune held up his hands immediately.
"NORA! I would never!"
Ren immediately relaxed. Nora giggled and playfully punched Jaune's shoulder, which made him wince.
"I was just kidding, ya silly! Hee! Now… maybe if you and Ren fused…"
Yang grinned.
"I mean, I guess sharing with Nora isn't the worst then…"
Weiss sighed, glaring at Jaune. "You're an agent of absolute chaos."
"Me?!"
"Guys, we appreciate the visit," Yang said pointedly at Blake and Pyrrha, "but my fiancé and I need rest. So could you give us some space?"
CRASH! A wall exploded inward, dust and debris flying as a beautiful, stacked woman with light purple hair in a flowing Mistralian dress burst through dramatically.
"NEE HAO!" She declared, striking a pose.
Weiss, Blake, Pyrrha and Ren all reached for their weapons, while Nora grinned. Ruby and Jaune gasped as Yang groaned.
"AUNTIE SHAMPOO?!" Ruby cried.
Shampoo beamed. "RUBY!" She swept Ruby into a bone-crushing hug.
"Oh no… Auntie Shampoo," Yang groaned, slumping back.
Weiss rolled her eyes.
"So it's not just Arc with the weird family members."
Blake nodded.
"Yeah… with the Schnees, it's you."
Weiss flushed.
"SHUT UP!"
Shampoo released Ruby from her hug, her violet eyes narrowing with concern as she turned to Yang. "Oh! Sorry! How you get injured?" She rummaged in her satchel and thrust a glowing vial at her. "Here! Potion! Alleviate pain!"Yang took it offhandedly, popping the cork and downing a swig. She instantly felt better and she smiled at her aunt.
"Spar with my fiancé…" Her eyes widened. Oh crap!
Shampoo's head snapped up. "FIANCE?!"
Ruby winced and laughed awkwardly.
"Ummmm…"
Weiss smirked, relishing the chaos. "Oh yes… I suppose she didn't tell you."
Yang stammered, her face heating up. "I-uh…"
Pyrrha and Blake both twitched. Their glares could've melted steel. Ren hid a smirk.
Nora, oblivious and beaming, pointed dramatically at Jaune. "YEAH! That's her fiancé right there! My team leader, Jaune!"
Jaune waved weakly.
"U-Uh… hello, ma'am?"
"Didn't Granny Xiao-Long tell you?" Weiss added mercilessly.
"Weiss!" Ruby hissed.
Shampoo scowled, stalking over to Jaune's bed like a predator sizing up prey. She poked him hard in the ribs.
"Ow!" Jaune yelped, flinching.
"AUNTIE! Leave him alone!" Yang barked, sitting up despite her bruises.
"Yeah!" Ruby chimed in, puffing out her chest. "He's my best friend! And maybe my fian-"
"AND NOTHING MORE!" Yang added hastily, her cheeks flaming.
"He could be!" Ruby growled.
Shampoo gave Jaune a very skeptical look, her eyes sharp as knives.
"Hmmmm… He any good?"
Yang shrugged, playing it cool(ish).
"Well, he beat me, soooo…"
"And he's a very good team leader!" Pyrrha added, gaining a smile from Jaune. She blushed happily, disregarding the irritated looks she got from Yang, Blake and Ruby.
Weiss nodded.
"He's in the bottom quarter of the class and a near complete loser… but he did manage to defeat Yang."
Jaune winced. Yang scowled.
"Ok, Weiss Cream," Yang drawled, her lilac eyes glinting, "that first part was unnecessary."
Blake scowled harder, her ears twitching under her bow like they were about to launch. Pyrrha's smile was a bit tense.
Weiss huffed, chin high.
"It's very necessary!"
Yang smirked, leaning in. "Weiss, you almost lose to him every time, and you've had years of training. He just tanks everything you throw at him."
Shampoo considered this, while Weiss sputtered. "I don't ALMOST lose! Especially not to the Deadlast!"
"You really do," Pyrrha observed.
Weiss scowled.
Shampoo tilted her head curiously. "What? He dead last and work his way up?"
Jaune straightened, cheeks flushing but voice steady. "Y-Yes, ma'am! I… I wasn't very good to start, but I've put a lot of effort into getting better and my friends help me a lot!"
Shampoo tilted her head.
"Why?"
Jaune met her gaze, earnest as ever.
"Because I… I want to be a great Huntsman. Like my parents. And to protect people."
Shampoo hummed. "Hmmm…"
She circled Jaune again, then nodded approvingly.
"Good person."
Yang beamed, waving her off. "See? Good person. Stop poking him now, Auntie."
Shampoo poked his cheek one last time. She raised an eyebrow.
"He goof."
"Wow, she's good!" Nora gasped. Jaune coughed, but shrugged.
"…Yes…"
Shampoo hummed and smiled fondly.
"Like my brother," she added.
Jaune blinked. "I uh…"
Ruby tilted her head, silver eyes sparkling. "Huh! He is a little like Dad…"
Oh Breaker, Yang thought, freezing. If they say I have a complex…
Blake smirked, catching Yang's panic… And blushing a bit, since she was into that sort of thing.
Jaune, oblivious, sputtered: "I-I wouldn't know… But I hope it's a good thing?"
Shampoo nodded sagely.
"Good! Marry boy like good dad, have good marriage. Marry boy like bad dad, have bad marriage." She sighed dramatically.
"Marry idiot jerk, have idiotic jerk marriage," she added, bitter and unhappy.
Yang blinked, then snorted. "I… guess that checks out?"
Shampoo nodded and beamed.
"Strong aura! Good heart! Beat strongest warrior? Very good!" She grinned, slapping Jaune on the back hard enough to rattle his IV stand. "You marry Yang! Then Ruby too!"
Jaune gaped. "Ghk—! W-what?!"
"YAY!" Ruby cheered.
"Over my dead body, Auntie!" Yang snarled. Ruby scowled.
"Yaaang!"
Pyrrha's hand twitched toward Milo. "I… second that."
Blake's ears flattened. "Third."
Nora grinned.
"Fourth! Wait, can I be fifth? Group hug marriage sounds amazing! But only if Renny is involved!"
Ren just sighed.
"Nora…"
The door—the actual door—burst open with a bang, and Glynda Goodwitch stormed in, riding crop in hand, her glasses flashing with fury.
"What the—MRS. SAOTOME! What are you doing?! Are you aware we have DOORS?!"
Shampoo spun, grinning like a cat with cream. "Hello, Unmarried Professor."
Glynda twitched angrily. Shampoo's grin grew just a bit.
"You fix everything, don't you?" Shampoo teased, hands on hips. "Hmph!"
Glynda's eye twitched harder, her voice a whip-crack.
"…I believe you'll be leaving with your family members before I make MORE holes I'll have to fix."
Shampoo started forward, muscles flexing—then sighed, slumping playfully.
"…Fine. We go." She scooped Ruby into a hug, spinning her once. She then hugged Yang again. "Little Red Reaper! Little Dragon! Visit soon! Bring husband-candidate!"
She winked at Jaune, who turned beet red.
Ruby squealed.
"Yay! Bye, Auntie Shampoo!"
"S-Sure!" Yang managed.
Shampoo blew kisses to everyone—lingering extra long on Jaune—then vaulted out the window anyway, because doors were for amateurs. Glass shattered faintly outside, followed by a cheerful "NEE HAO!" echoing across campus.
Glynda pinched her nose, aura flaring to seal the wall again. She glared at Jauen and Yang.
"Arc… Xiao Long… Rest. Or I'll make you."
"Yes ma'am," the students chorused. Glynda turned and stalked out angrily. Nora pouted.
"Aww, group hug over already? Next time, I crash through the wall!"
Ren just sighed.
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Futurama reference. Fry to Leela on the cruiseship episode I believe.
