Thank you for that, it originally wasn't but that's because it was late at night when I finally posted the edits and I hadn't realised that my formatting had been eaten by QQ until after Qaw posted about the eyes.
Very effective into. If you haven't seen the pilot, it lets the imagination run wild. If you have... I imagine for anyone reading through this for the first time that radio coming into tune would be a major "Oh shit" moment. It also sells how serious his presence is to see Taylor taking him seriously: from the moment he shows up, her full attention is on dealing with new threat.
This is pure headcanon, but I always figured the title of Overlord was assigned based on overall power and influence. The type of power doesn't matter too much: minions, money, technology, political connections, magic... it all totals up. Different Overlords presumably have different mixes.
...I think Taylor's communication bug-balls just got very important. Right now, it might be the only way to communicate they have without others listening in.
...You know, sometimes when I read fanfic, I like to imagine how things might seem if the same event were part of a different story. One about another one of the characters, from a different perspective. How things might look from the outside, if we all didn't know exactly who Taylor is and what she did.
This is honestly a really cool moment, taking an image we remember from the show and recontextualizing it. It's a great way of showing just how far Taylor has yet to go and how outgunned she is, while also making the fic feel like Hazbin by typing back to the show.
You do a much better job of selling the reader on the deal in this version, I think, instead of just having us screaming at Taylor not to do the dumb thing. In particular, this passage really drives home that she needs protection, that being wiped out by Valentino isn't just a maybe but something that's going to happen soon if she doesn't accept.
This.
Permanent upgrade to Hell's ecosystem? Permanent upgrade to Hell's ecosystem GOGOGO. Kill Skitter, and you soon won't need the Angels to deal with overpopulation.
Still missed this part.
Scurry's girlfriend is Octavia!?
I like her, she's in character and feels like a person instead of "Super-Mom"
Funny thout of her being on a soup box and ringing a bell while screaming the end is nigh hell is real you sinners while the rest of the team is looking at her on the other side of the street...
Ayup.
To be fair, Taylor in canon enjoyed being surrounded by hot women most of the time as well.
Fair enough, it is a significant tone shift from how it was before, and a lot of the happy family thing is mostly due to how Taylor sees her Mom as the woman who can do nothing wrong, and while she was apprehensive before, she's far more trusting of her than she lets on. Like with herself, if her Mom turned out to be a horrible person, Taylor would likely make excuses for her just like she would herself and she's rather bias, so she very much wants to trust and will look for excuses to do that. The mastering excuse the Annette mentions is part of the reason why Taylor is less apprehensive about the clones, though I somehow forgot to make the changes to make her more confrontational and more suspicious of the clones despite her Mom trusting them.
Okay so I just had a thought that just fucking consumed me that I could not focus on that bit after the quote. Is TT going to see if she could summon Taylor in a demon ritual and somehow Taylor ends up making a deal with Sarah/Lisa to guarantee TT's soul will go to her in hell so they can be together?
Nope, not even them. 'Cause, you know, baptisms.
Punctuation?
shit's
has
eye-drawing
was
clones'
skyscrapers.
Did you mean something like scaffolding?
I
on
bodyguarding (perhaps body-guarding)
Mimi
move
hasn't
downright
This would need something like "I say" first
which
were
I did
