April 17, Part 1
Darkenning
Pervert. Also, possible world-destroying monster.
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"No, not fine," Morgana said a bit less than twenty-four hours later.
He had actually found himself a bit impressed by the first steps of the Plan B that his Wild Card had developed, since they involved waiting until the landlord had gone home for the night and then sneaking out of the building through the upstairs window to scale the wall to the street below. It was a fine demonstration of the Noble Arts of Phantom Thievery. Unfortunately, things had promptly gone wrong as the rest of the plan involved visiting a variety of 24 hour convenience stores and purchasing pain relievers there. Morgana had no idea of the medicinal quality of these products, but what he did know was that none of them had the right aura to be useful inside of a palace. So that was a bust, and only the sight of her scaling the wall and going back in through the window had soothed his temper.
Which had led to the current situation, after the end of Monday classes, in which Kurusu met with Ryuji and the other one to propose Plan C -- "go in without medicine and then be very, very careful". To their credit, the two of them had been almost as dubious about this notion as Morgana. Of course, in his own case, to call him "dubious" was the understatement of the century.
"I mean, isn't being cautious part of being a Phantom Thief?" asked Kurusu.
"There is being cautious, as in being prepared for the worst," Morgana explained, through clenched teeth, "and there is being a different kind of reckless, where you don't prepare for the worst and rely on optimistic projections of how careful you can be once the situation gets going!" With an effort, he calmed down. "Look, Akira -- do you mind if I call you Akira?" he asked.
"I don't see how I can stop you."
"Right, right. Akira, the fact that we always take weapons with us into the Palace is a sign that we need to expect possible conflict. And expecting possible conflict means expecting possible bad outcomes for those conflicts. With your plan, every time we run into danger, we would afterwards face a choice between retreating to the exit or pressing on despite injuries and thus inviting further injuries. Neither of those sounds desirable, right? You wanted to get this done as quickly as possible, right? For Suzui-san's sake, right?"
Morgana could feel Ann glaring at him for that last bit, and felt a bit like a heel watching Kurusu starting to crumple up on herself in response to all of this. But it was important enough that --
"Look, how'bout this?" interjected Ryuji. "I'll go see the doc instead. I mean, I've already got medical history!" With that, he slapped his bum leg and gave a probably mostly exaggerated wince. "Oh, doctor, it's gotten so much worse lately, please give me some pain pills!" he said in an exaggeratedly hapless tone.
Morgana turned to look at him. "That might be a viable solution, Sir --"
"No," said Kurusu, faintly. "I-I'll take care of it. I messed up, so I'll fix it. It may take a while though," she added as an afterthought.
"Okay," said Ann, speaking for the first time today. "So we'll wait here for you --"
"No," Kurusu repeated. "That won't work. I don't know how long this will take, and someone might come up here to check whether someone is hanging around after school. Uh, le-let's meet up outside, ah, that restaurant in Shibuya." She nodded once.
"All right," said Morgana. "Well, then, let's get --"
"You're going with Ann and Ryuji," Kurusu interrupted without glancing at the cat-shaped person. "I can't -- I need -- yeah," she concluded, then promptly turned on her heel and walked away alone, closing the rooftop access door heavily once she passed through it.
"Well, this is not what I was expectiyaaaaah!" Mona started out pensively and then squalled as Ann picked up the bag and brought his face up to her own, both due to the sudden motion and the decidedly unfriendly expression with which he was currently being regarded.
"What happened, cat?" Ann snarled.
"Okay, you are clearly really upset, so I'm not going to remind you that I am not --" Morgana started to say in a soothing and reasonable tone, then coughed before resuming in a much more outraged one. "I told you what happened!"
"You gave us an outline, not the effing details!" she retorted.
"... I just realized that you say 'effing' almost as much as I do," said Ryuji, watching all this in confusion. "Does she ever call you on it?"
"The details, Morgana!" Ann demanded, ignoring all that.
"I don't know what details you want, though!" Morgana protested. "All that happened was that we went in, and it turned out that the doctor, who's kind of sexy but obviously that couldn't be any problem for Kurusu, said some stuff about how she knew Kurusu's family and the next thing I know she's running out of the office and just pausing long enough to listen in on --"
Ann's face drained of color, and the bag slipped out of her hands. Morgana let out another squawk as Ryuji snatched the bag before it landed.
"Y'all right there?" Ryuji asked the not-a-cat.
"My life flashed before my eyes," Morgana said faintly. "I mean, there isn't much of it, but still --"
"I don't believe it. Why the hell didn't I even consider it?" asked Ann of no one in particular, ignoring this byplay.
"What? What?" Ryuji and Morgana asked.
"What kind of parents just let their adolescent daughter get sent to juvie and then put on probation miles away from them?" Ann asked, finally regarding them. "Answer, ones who are either more neglectful than mine, which is hard to imagine, or ones who --" Her eyes darted to Ryuji and then her lips momentarily clamped down.
"Oh," said Ryuji, aghast.
"So naturally, any reference to them is going to upset her! And we sent her back for more of that! WE ARE ALL FUCKING IDIOTS!" she concluded at the top of her lungs.
The roof access door opened noisily. "While there are many worse things than shouting profanity that someone could be doing on the off-limits rooftop after school hours," said a rather tense female voice, "that is still something contrary to school regulations."
He had actually found himself a bit impressed by the first steps of the Plan B that his Wild Card had developed, since they involved waiting until the landlord had gone home for the night and then sneaking out of the building through the upstairs window to scale the wall to the street below. It was a fine demonstration of the Noble Arts of Phantom Thievery. Unfortunately, things had promptly gone wrong as the rest of the plan involved visiting a variety of 24 hour convenience stores and purchasing pain relievers there. Morgana had no idea of the medicinal quality of these products, but what he did know was that none of them had the right aura to be useful inside of a palace. So that was a bust, and only the sight of her scaling the wall and going back in through the window had soothed his temper.
Which had led to the current situation, after the end of Monday classes, in which Kurusu met with Ryuji and the other one to propose Plan C -- "go in without medicine and then be very, very careful". To their credit, the two of them had been almost as dubious about this notion as Morgana. Of course, in his own case, to call him "dubious" was the understatement of the century.
"I mean, isn't being cautious part of being a Phantom Thief?" asked Kurusu.
"There is being cautious, as in being prepared for the worst," Morgana explained, through clenched teeth, "and there is being a different kind of reckless, where you don't prepare for the worst and rely on optimistic projections of how careful you can be once the situation gets going!" With an effort, he calmed down. "Look, Akira -- do you mind if I call you Akira?" he asked.
"I don't see how I can stop you."
"Right, right. Akira, the fact that we always take weapons with us into the Palace is a sign that we need to expect possible conflict. And expecting possible conflict means expecting possible bad outcomes for those conflicts. With your plan, every time we run into danger, we would afterwards face a choice between retreating to the exit or pressing on despite injuries and thus inviting further injuries. Neither of those sounds desirable, right? You wanted to get this done as quickly as possible, right? For Suzui-san's sake, right?"
Morgana could feel Ann glaring at him for that last bit, and felt a bit like a heel watching Kurusu starting to crumple up on herself in response to all of this. But it was important enough that --
"Look, how'bout this?" interjected Ryuji. "I'll go see the doc instead. I mean, I've already got medical history!" With that, he slapped his bum leg and gave a probably mostly exaggerated wince. "Oh, doctor, it's gotten so much worse lately, please give me some pain pills!" he said in an exaggeratedly hapless tone.
Morgana turned to look at him. "That might be a viable solution, Sir --"
"No," said Kurusu, faintly. "I-I'll take care of it. I messed up, so I'll fix it. It may take a while though," she added as an afterthought.
"Okay," said Ann, speaking for the first time today. "So we'll wait here for you --"
"No," Kurusu repeated. "That won't work. I don't know how long this will take, and someone might come up here to check whether someone is hanging around after school. Uh, le-let's meet up outside, ah, that restaurant in Shibuya." She nodded once.
"All right," said Morgana. "Well, then, let's get --"
"You're going with Ann and Ryuji," Kurusu interrupted without glancing at the cat-shaped person. "I can't -- I need -- yeah," she concluded, then promptly turned on her heel and walked away alone, closing the rooftop access door heavily once she passed through it.
"Well, this is not what I was expectiyaaaaah!" Mona started out pensively and then squalled as Ann picked up the bag and brought his face up to her own, both due to the sudden motion and the decidedly unfriendly expression with which he was currently being regarded.
"What happened, cat?" Ann snarled.
"Okay, you are clearly really upset, so I'm not going to remind you that I am not --" Morgana started to say in a soothing and reasonable tone, then coughed before resuming in a much more outraged one. "I told you what happened!"
"You gave us an outline, not the effing details!" she retorted.
"... I just realized that you say 'effing' almost as much as I do," said Ryuji, watching all this in confusion. "Does she ever call you on it?"
"The details, Morgana!" Ann demanded, ignoring all that.
"I don't know what details you want, though!" Morgana protested. "All that happened was that we went in, and it turned out that the doctor, who's kind of sexy but obviously that couldn't be any problem for Kurusu, said some stuff about how she knew Kurusu's family and the next thing I know she's running out of the office and just pausing long enough to listen in on --"
Ann's face drained of color, and the bag slipped out of her hands. Morgana let out another squawk as Ryuji snatched the bag before it landed.
"Y'all right there?" Ryuji asked the not-a-cat.
"My life flashed before my eyes," Morgana said faintly. "I mean, there isn't much of it, but still --"
"I don't believe it. Why the hell didn't I even consider it?" asked Ann of no one in particular, ignoring this byplay.
"What? What?" Ryuji and Morgana asked.
"What kind of parents just let their adolescent daughter get sent to juvie and then put on probation miles away from them?" Ann asked, finally regarding them. "Answer, ones who are either more neglectful than mine, which is hard to imagine, or ones who --" Her eyes darted to Ryuji and then her lips momentarily clamped down.
"Oh," said Ryuji, aghast.
"So naturally, any reference to them is going to upset her! And we sent her back for more of that! WE ARE ALL FUCKING IDIOTS!" she concluded at the top of her lungs.
The roof access door opened noisily. "While there are many worse things than shouting profanity that someone could be doing on the off-limits rooftop after school hours," said a rather tense female voice, "that is still something contrary to school regulations."