Mr Zoat
Dedicated ragequitter
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17th November
08:23 GMT +8
Green Arrow unslings his bow while looking over the targets. "Hm. Bit mundane given all this build up, but I'm game." He looks up at Tao. "How are we scoring this?"
Tao looks at me a little uncertainly. "I had thought that this was to be a demonstration. I did not think that we would be competing."
Green Arrow smiles. "Yeah, keep telling yourself that. Artemis, you want in?"
Artemis looks at the targets, at Tao, at me and then back at him. "Ohh no. I know a set-up when I see one."
Green Arrow moves his right hand to cover his heart. "Your lack of faith wounds me, Artemis. Right here."
"Mister Zatara." I gesture to Green Arrow who's already putting his first arrow to string. Should I tell him that that's an inefficient technique? No, this is a test of accuracy, not speed. He should do whatever he's most comfortable with, and anyway I'm not sure the fast shot technique works with his trick arrows. "Subject one, 'Green Arrow', real name.. nominally classified, thirty two years of age. Baseline Human. With no significantly debilitating injuries he's at his physical prime. Began studying the use of the bow when he was.. nineteen, I believe?" Green Arrow turns his head my way and nods once. "And has continued to train himself since, using the criminals of Star City as target practice. For this demonstration he'll be using simple point arrows and a conventional recurve bow with a draw weight of around fifty kilograms."
He pulls the string taut and then relaxes it a little, limbering himself up. "One hundred and one pounds."
"Forty five kilograms."
"Sounds a lot less impressive like that."
Black Canary smiles as she shakes her head. I just roll my eyes. "Forty five thousand grams, then. Though the majority of his experience is in precise, rapid, short ranged shots his skill in other areas is advanced enough to put him in the top ten.. probably top five archers on the planet."
"Oh yeah?"
"I wouldn't have bothered asking if it wasn't a reasonable comparison."
"No, I mean how come I'm not number one? Or-" He nods at Tao. "-two, according to you?"
"I judge Shado's skill at long ranged and indirect fire to be superior to yours. Malcolm Merlyn has demonstrated the ability to shoot out individual organs." I incline my head towards Wonder Woman. "The Amazons Aella and Dessa are noted for their skill with the bow amongst a race who have had three thousand years to gain experience with primitive weapons. In fact, I would say that of the top one hundred archers in the world at least eighty five are Amazons."
"Really?" He looks at Black Canary. "Maybe I should visit sometime? Show those ladies how to really handle a s-." She pokes him in the ribs. "Hey, kidding!"
"He's about as good as baseline Humans get. It is also worth noting that Green Arrow hasn't practised in this environment before. The shape of the valley and the temperature of the rocks can create difficult air currents-."
"Please. I work in a city!"
"Perhaps the trees, then? I.. think that's everything. Oh, for this demonstration no artificial aids.. sights, anemometers, externally applied enchantments.. will be in use. Loose when ready."
Green Arrow loosens his neck, draws and takes aim at the first target. "How big're those targets?"
"One metre twe-" There's a thwack as his first arrow strikes the first target dead centre. "-nty." Bull's eye on the one hundred metre target. Tao doesn't look around.
Green Arrow notches another arrow. "Are we taking it in turns, or what?"
I make a dismissive gesture with my right hand. "Take a shot at each target. There's no hurry."
His second and third bury themselves in their targets' centre. Fourth is a little off-centre, though still within the bull's eye. Green Arrow tilts his head to the side. "See what you mean about the air currents." He notches his fifth and takes noticeably longer to aim before loosing. Dead centre at two hundred metres. Despite myself I find that I'm being impressed. I mean, it's a pointlessly outdated weapon and all that but he's bloody good with it. He looks up at Tao. "Worried yet?"
"No, sir."
"Oh really?"
"May I say, I consider that it is a privilege for me to compete with you."
"You may."
Tao frowns. "I beg your pardon, sir. I have been learning English for only a short time. I do not believe that I understand..?"
"Ah, don't worry about it." He draws his sixth. "This is where it gets interesting..." The distance is enough that we can actually watch the arrow in flight. Thwack! Right on the black line between the inner and middle rings. "Aaah." Two hundred and twenty five metres and he's disappointed? I'm impressed that he can hit the damn thing at all. There'd be a delay in me hitting it from here with a construct! I mean, that's what laser projection constructs are for, but still. He notches and draws another, now completely focused on his task. Shoom.. thwack. Blue, outer circle. He takes a moment to breathe before slowly drawing another arrow, notching, drawing and taking aim. The arrow is visibly pointed away from the target now. Another careful breath and he looses. Thwack. Inner red. A hit at two hundred and fifty metres. Should I call the people at the Guinness Book of Records? His eighth arrow is drawn just as slowly as the seventh. He aims, looses and.. it moves past the target to break on the vertical wall of the mountain. "Uuh. No do-overs, right?" He lowers the bow and rolls his shoulders before taking out a new arrow. "This next one's about three hundred twenty yards, right?"
"About that."
He takes a couple of deep breaths, notches, draws, aims and looses. As he does I find that I actually rather want him to win. I mean, it'd be pretty terrible if he did, but... My goodness. Outer blue at three hundred metres. Ring, that wasn't us, was it?
Negative. No assistance was provided.
I suppose.. over that sort of range the factors that he can't properly predict mount up. If he took five more shots at the same target he might not get any more hits.
"Last one." He's smiling as he looks at Black Canary. "Kiss for luck?" For a second her eyes flick over the rest of us before she walks up to him and lightly presses her lips to his. They stay together for a moment and then she steps back. "Well, now I've really got to hit it." He takes out another arrow and looks it over critically. He runs his right index finger along the shaft and the tip then checks the fletching before holding it up to stare along its length. Finding no imperfections he notches, draws and takes careful aim. Three hundred and twenty five metres. He looses, all of us staring intently at the path of the arrow as it flies towards.. and over the top of the target. And the mountain.
Whoops. Ring, transfer! I appear on the far side of the ridge, an orange aura extending from me in all directions. The arrow slows to a stop as it flies towards me and I pick it up with my right hand before transferring back and returning it to its owner. He takes it with a slight wince. "Eight hits out of ten, the furthest at three hundred metres. Perhaps you are number two after all, sir."
"Haven't seen number one yet." He looks up at Tao once more. "Well, 'Celestial Archer'? Still think you can do better?"
"Would you please step back a little, sir?"
"Ah, okay?" He and I both move back towards the pavilion as Tao closes his eyes. He takes a single arrow out of the quiver on his back before closing a flap over the top of it.
"Subject two, 'Celestial Archer', real name Xu Tao, sixteen years of age." His eyes open. "Augmented Human. Began studying the use of the bow when he was fourteen and more or less fell over the Celestial Bow of Yi." His eyes flick down and his lips tighten. Is he embarrassed about it? "Was conscripted into the Great Ten in two thousand and eight after a brief period of independent operation. His augmentations are a gift from the goddess Chang'e, the widow of his bow's former owner. Please note that unlike me she was able to fully charge his soul grafts almost immediately. The Celestial Bow -if I understand correctly- is an arcane weapon with an infinite draw capacity. Superman could pull on it without being able to overdraw it. Celestial Archer, begin when ready."
He bows his head slightly, eyes narrowed, arrow resting loosely against his bowstring. He's still sitting facing us with the targets behind him. He starts leaning forwards, overbalancing. As he falls to a right angle with the rock face he pushes off, spinning vertically and horizontally as he does so. I can't even track it as his arrow disappears, his body twisting to bring his legs back underneath him as he bends his legs slightly to absorb the impact. He straightens facing us and then gives his audience a shallow bow.
Green Arrow looks puzzled. "Okay, but.. what..?" He looks at the first target. His own arrow has been shot through the middle. "Oh, trick shot is it?" He smiles. "Pretty good. Now lets see you do the res-." Black Canary lays her right hand on his shoulder and points to the next target with her left hand. Another of Tao's arrows has split his. He blinks and then takes another look at Tao's quiver. Yes, still closed. His arrow at the third target has similarly been split. In the fourth, Tao's arrow is firmly placed at the centre. Fifth is split, then centre, centre, centre, centre and centre. Green Arrow gapes in astonishment. "But-! How did-!"
Zatanna points at Tao while looking at her father. "See Dad, totally safe. And amazing!"
"To perform many shots with one arrow is one of the advanced techniques I am able to perform." Tao shifts his weight to his left leg. "I.. have not offended you, I hope? You have been an inspiration to me."
"If you're still not convinced sir, I set up some targets on the ridge line over there." I point out across the valley. "Celestial Archer could pierce them with little difficulty."
Green Arrow and Artemis both turn around and try and get their heads around the idea. Tao shifts his weight to his right leg. "I... I am sorry?"
Green Arrow waves at him. "No, no... That's.. that's fine." He turns to look at Black Canary. "Maybe we should have kissed for longer?" She pats him on the shoulder.
Artemis takes one last look across the valley before walking up to an increasingly uncomfortable looking Xu Tao. "You got any plans for the rest of the day?"
He leans back slightly. "Um? No?" He looks at me for direction, initiative not being encouraged amongst the Great Ten. I point at him with my right index finger and mime sniggering. He looks back at Artemis. "Is there something that you want to do?"
08:23 GMT +8
Green Arrow unslings his bow while looking over the targets. "Hm. Bit mundane given all this build up, but I'm game." He looks up at Tao. "How are we scoring this?"
Tao looks at me a little uncertainly. "I had thought that this was to be a demonstration. I did not think that we would be competing."
Green Arrow smiles. "Yeah, keep telling yourself that. Artemis, you want in?"
Artemis looks at the targets, at Tao, at me and then back at him. "Ohh no. I know a set-up when I see one."
Green Arrow moves his right hand to cover his heart. "Your lack of faith wounds me, Artemis. Right here."
"Mister Zatara." I gesture to Green Arrow who's already putting his first arrow to string. Should I tell him that that's an inefficient technique? No, this is a test of accuracy, not speed. He should do whatever he's most comfortable with, and anyway I'm not sure the fast shot technique works with his trick arrows. "Subject one, 'Green Arrow', real name.. nominally classified, thirty two years of age. Baseline Human. With no significantly debilitating injuries he's at his physical prime. Began studying the use of the bow when he was.. nineteen, I believe?" Green Arrow turns his head my way and nods once. "And has continued to train himself since, using the criminals of Star City as target practice. For this demonstration he'll be using simple point arrows and a conventional recurve bow with a draw weight of around fifty kilograms."
He pulls the string taut and then relaxes it a little, limbering himself up. "One hundred and one pounds."
"Forty five kilograms."
"Sounds a lot less impressive like that."
Black Canary smiles as she shakes her head. I just roll my eyes. "Forty five thousand grams, then. Though the majority of his experience is in precise, rapid, short ranged shots his skill in other areas is advanced enough to put him in the top ten.. probably top five archers on the planet."
"Oh yeah?"
"I wouldn't have bothered asking if it wasn't a reasonable comparison."
"No, I mean how come I'm not number one? Or-" He nods at Tao. "-two, according to you?"
"I judge Shado's skill at long ranged and indirect fire to be superior to yours. Malcolm Merlyn has demonstrated the ability to shoot out individual organs." I incline my head towards Wonder Woman. "The Amazons Aella and Dessa are noted for their skill with the bow amongst a race who have had three thousand years to gain experience with primitive weapons. In fact, I would say that of the top one hundred archers in the world at least eighty five are Amazons."
"Really?" He looks at Black Canary. "Maybe I should visit sometime? Show those ladies how to really handle a s-." She pokes him in the ribs. "Hey, kidding!"
"He's about as good as baseline Humans get. It is also worth noting that Green Arrow hasn't practised in this environment before. The shape of the valley and the temperature of the rocks can create difficult air currents-."
"Please. I work in a city!"
"Perhaps the trees, then? I.. think that's everything. Oh, for this demonstration no artificial aids.. sights, anemometers, externally applied enchantments.. will be in use. Loose when ready."
Green Arrow loosens his neck, draws and takes aim at the first target. "How big're those targets?"
"One metre twe-" There's a thwack as his first arrow strikes the first target dead centre. "-nty." Bull's eye on the one hundred metre target. Tao doesn't look around.
Green Arrow notches another arrow. "Are we taking it in turns, or what?"
I make a dismissive gesture with my right hand. "Take a shot at each target. There's no hurry."
His second and third bury themselves in their targets' centre. Fourth is a little off-centre, though still within the bull's eye. Green Arrow tilts his head to the side. "See what you mean about the air currents." He notches his fifth and takes noticeably longer to aim before loosing. Dead centre at two hundred metres. Despite myself I find that I'm being impressed. I mean, it's a pointlessly outdated weapon and all that but he's bloody good with it. He looks up at Tao. "Worried yet?"
"No, sir."
"Oh really?"
"May I say, I consider that it is a privilege for me to compete with you."
"You may."
Tao frowns. "I beg your pardon, sir. I have been learning English for only a short time. I do not believe that I understand..?"
"Ah, don't worry about it." He draws his sixth. "This is where it gets interesting..." The distance is enough that we can actually watch the arrow in flight. Thwack! Right on the black line between the inner and middle rings. "Aaah." Two hundred and twenty five metres and he's disappointed? I'm impressed that he can hit the damn thing at all. There'd be a delay in me hitting it from here with a construct! I mean, that's what laser projection constructs are for, but still. He notches and draws another, now completely focused on his task. Shoom.. thwack. Blue, outer circle. He takes a moment to breathe before slowly drawing another arrow, notching, drawing and taking aim. The arrow is visibly pointed away from the target now. Another careful breath and he looses. Thwack. Inner red. A hit at two hundred and fifty metres. Should I call the people at the Guinness Book of Records? His eighth arrow is drawn just as slowly as the seventh. He aims, looses and.. it moves past the target to break on the vertical wall of the mountain. "Uuh. No do-overs, right?" He lowers the bow and rolls his shoulders before taking out a new arrow. "This next one's about three hundred twenty yards, right?"
"About that."
He takes a couple of deep breaths, notches, draws, aims and looses. As he does I find that I actually rather want him to win. I mean, it'd be pretty terrible if he did, but... My goodness. Outer blue at three hundred metres. Ring, that wasn't us, was it?
Negative. No assistance was provided.
I suppose.. over that sort of range the factors that he can't properly predict mount up. If he took five more shots at the same target he might not get any more hits.
"Last one." He's smiling as he looks at Black Canary. "Kiss for luck?" For a second her eyes flick over the rest of us before she walks up to him and lightly presses her lips to his. They stay together for a moment and then she steps back. "Well, now I've really got to hit it." He takes out another arrow and looks it over critically. He runs his right index finger along the shaft and the tip then checks the fletching before holding it up to stare along its length. Finding no imperfections he notches, draws and takes careful aim. Three hundred and twenty five metres. He looses, all of us staring intently at the path of the arrow as it flies towards.. and over the top of the target. And the mountain.
Whoops. Ring, transfer! I appear on the far side of the ridge, an orange aura extending from me in all directions. The arrow slows to a stop as it flies towards me and I pick it up with my right hand before transferring back and returning it to its owner. He takes it with a slight wince. "Eight hits out of ten, the furthest at three hundred metres. Perhaps you are number two after all, sir."
"Haven't seen number one yet." He looks up at Tao once more. "Well, 'Celestial Archer'? Still think you can do better?"
"Would you please step back a little, sir?"
"Ah, okay?" He and I both move back towards the pavilion as Tao closes his eyes. He takes a single arrow out of the quiver on his back before closing a flap over the top of it.
"Subject two, 'Celestial Archer', real name Xu Tao, sixteen years of age." His eyes open. "Augmented Human. Began studying the use of the bow when he was fourteen and more or less fell over the Celestial Bow of Yi." His eyes flick down and his lips tighten. Is he embarrassed about it? "Was conscripted into the Great Ten in two thousand and eight after a brief period of independent operation. His augmentations are a gift from the goddess Chang'e, the widow of his bow's former owner. Please note that unlike me she was able to fully charge his soul grafts almost immediately. The Celestial Bow -if I understand correctly- is an arcane weapon with an infinite draw capacity. Superman could pull on it without being able to overdraw it. Celestial Archer, begin when ready."
He bows his head slightly, eyes narrowed, arrow resting loosely against his bowstring. He's still sitting facing us with the targets behind him. He starts leaning forwards, overbalancing. As he falls to a right angle with the rock face he pushes off, spinning vertically and horizontally as he does so. I can't even track it as his arrow disappears, his body twisting to bring his legs back underneath him as he bends his legs slightly to absorb the impact. He straightens facing us and then gives his audience a shallow bow.
Green Arrow looks puzzled. "Okay, but.. what..?" He looks at the first target. His own arrow has been shot through the middle. "Oh, trick shot is it?" He smiles. "Pretty good. Now lets see you do the res-." Black Canary lays her right hand on his shoulder and points to the next target with her left hand. Another of Tao's arrows has split his. He blinks and then takes another look at Tao's quiver. Yes, still closed. His arrow at the third target has similarly been split. In the fourth, Tao's arrow is firmly placed at the centre. Fifth is split, then centre, centre, centre, centre and centre. Green Arrow gapes in astonishment. "But-! How did-!"
Zatanna points at Tao while looking at her father. "See Dad, totally safe. And amazing!"
"To perform many shots with one arrow is one of the advanced techniques I am able to perform." Tao shifts his weight to his left leg. "I.. have not offended you, I hope? You have been an inspiration to me."
"If you're still not convinced sir, I set up some targets on the ridge line over there." I point out across the valley. "Celestial Archer could pierce them with little difficulty."
Green Arrow and Artemis both turn around and try and get their heads around the idea. Tao shifts his weight to his right leg. "I... I am sorry?"
Green Arrow waves at him. "No, no... That's.. that's fine." He turns to look at Black Canary. "Maybe we should have kissed for longer?" She pats him on the shoulder.
Artemis takes one last look across the valley before walking up to an increasingly uncomfortable looking Xu Tao. "You got any plans for the rest of the day?"
He leans back slightly. "Um? No?" He looks at me for direction, initiative not being encouraged amongst the Great Ten. I point at him with my right index finger and mime sniggering. He looks back at Artemis. "Is there something that you want to do?"