Richard Castle, Watcher (Castle/Buffy) (Complete)

[Starfox5]

*snrrk*

This is interesting to me, because I'm only familiar with either Castle or Buffy from other fanfiction, but I still enjoy this quite a bit. Nice work.

Can't comment on canon-compliance, but I love Castle's character voice. This is sort of making me want to hunt down and watch the show.

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I generally don't watch crime shows, but I watch Castle just for the character interaction.

You will enjoy it. Castle's even snarkier on the show. There's a distinct lack of the supernatural, sure, but it's like Scooby Doo; once in a while, an odd one will pop, and Castle will leap on the weird angle, and Beckett will be going "No," even as Castle is cheerfully positing his latest crackpot theory.

And there's one or two where he might not even be wrong ...

Incidentally, Castle is canonically a good fencer.

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And a good shot too - and not just with laser tag weapons

 

[Walkir]

And a good shot too - and not just with laser tag weapons

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... how much Mal IS in the character? Could we expect him to negotiate using a starship engine if there were any in the setting?

 

[Starfox5]

... how much Mal IS in the character? Could we expect him to negotiate using a starship engine if there were any in the setting?

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The TV Show Castle is much softer and far more idealistic than Mal. He makes dark jokes about corpses, but he'd not kick someone into a starship engine.

The Castle in this story though shot Wood with a flamethrower, doesn't think there's anything wrong with regularly beating up demons "to keep them in line" and is quite a bit more ruthless, and is a veteran soldier, of sorts - so, rather closer to Mal.

 

[macdjord]

... how much Mal IS in the character? Could we expect him to negotiate using a starship engine if there were any in the setting?

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Sometimes, he acts a lot like Mal~

 

[Ack]

Canon Castle is fairly crappy with a bow and arrow. Is Watcher!Castle any better?

 

[Starfox5]

Canon Castle is fairly crappy with a bow and arrow. Is Watcher!Castle any better?

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He got training with a crossbow, but he much prefers a gun, or a flamethrower. He has never bothered to learn to use a bow and arrow.

 

[Walkir]

Sometimes, he acts a lot like Mal~

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Cameos don't count.

 

[Starfox5]

New York, September 2009

"That's really posh. More so than it looked like in the brochure," Richard Castle commented when they stood in front of the dead man's home.

"Careful, Castle. Your English contamination is showing." Beckett grinned.

"Damn. Next, I'll drink tea instead of coffee, and then I'll get deported." Castle sighed as the entered the building. The inside wasn't posh. It was gaudy. Expensive, but ugly.

"They don't deport people for drinking tea." Beckett flashed her badge to the concierge. "NYPD. We need the key to the apartment 306."

The man checked her badge carefully - longer than most people Castle had seen interact with the detective so far - before he disappeared into the office behind the desk.

"I thought we had the key."

"That's evidence. There's no need to take it with us." Beckett explained.

The man returned, and handed the key over. He had the faintest accent - East European. Or Russian. He was still looking at them when they entered the elevator.

"I would feel better if Vi was with us," Rick stated inside the cabin. "That receptionist guy creeps me out. And that means something coming from a man who deals with demons regularly."

"He's probably a member of the Bratva." Beckett looked around.

"The what?" Castle couldn't spot what she was looking for. Hidden cameras?

"The Russian Mafia."

"Isn't that illegal?"

"There's this thing called 'evidence' we need to arrest people, Castle. We can't just burn them down on a suspicion." Beckett frowned at him. She was probably jealous that a Watcher didn't have to follow the same rules as a cop.

"Why would you think he's with the mob anyway? His accent?" Castle wondered. Beckett wasn't the type to do racial profiling.

"That, and the fact this building is owned by a front for the Bratva," Beckett said, as if she was talking about the weather.

"What?" Castle gaped at her. "And you only mention this now?" He didn't know much about the Russian Mafia, but he did know that they were brutal, lethal, and had no scruples at all. And with possible demonic influence… That would be a really ugly combination. A good story, though.

"If I had known you'd react like this, I'd have mentioned it earlier," Beckett snorted. "And gotten a camera." She shook her head, amusement audible in her tone. "Just don't insult them, don't provoke them, and don't hint at knowing anything about them that might get them jailed, and they'll not harm you at all." Beckett smiled at him.

"You've been waiting for an opportunity like this since we went to Clark's, haven't you?" Rick pouted at her.

"Would I do such a thing?" she asked, and he saw the corners of her mouth twitch.

"In a heartbeat." He knew she was rather competitive, or she wouldn't clash with Vi that much.

The elevator doors opened, revealing a hallway with too much brass and marble to look stylish or classy. "And they thought I'd want to live in such a house?" Castle asked, shaking his head.

"Shocking, isn't it? That someone could misjudge you so."

"I'll have to check with my publisher if my public image needs some corrections." He wouldn't want to be known as a rich man without class. He'd had enough of that attitude in England.

Rick didn't know why Beckett snorted at that.

The victim's apartment was not quite as ostentatious as the rest of the building. Not spartan, nor cheaply furnished, but definitely a cut below the standards, so to speak, of the Russian Mafia, as far as he could tell. "Do you think he was killed because he didn't have the required amount of gold-plated things in his apartment? Sort of like the mob version of the neighborhood association?"

"You know, these kind of comments do not fill me with confidence that your next book will be any good. You might want to stick to medieval fantasy," Beckett said while opening drawers of a cabinet in the hallway.

"Oh, you'll love the book, trust me!" And she would - who wouldn't like to be immortalized in a bestselling novel? As the main character?

"I would trust you a bit more if I could shake the suspicion that you'll have Nikki Heat go undercover as a stripper."

"Oh!" That was an idea!

"Castle! That was a joke, not a suggestion. Don't you dare…" she trailed off after opening the door to the victim's living room. "Bozhe moi!"

Rick didn't like the sound of that. And he liked the sight of a living room turned into a ritual chamber even less. "I don't know what you just said, but it sounded appropriate."

"Is that a real one, or a fake one?" She pointed at the circle edged into the wooden floor.

"I'm no expert, but it looks serviceable." A pentagram, lined with candles. He crouched down and ran a finger over the small grooves. "Dried blood." He took pictures of the scene, and sent them to London. Beckett didn't comment.

He turned to Beckett. "Did you see any books? Old, leather bound, maybe?" This kind of ritual wasn't done from memory.

"No, nothing like that."

They didn't find any tomes or grimoires by the time the uniforms arrived. Castle had a feeling that they too wouldn't find anything. Maybe Vi would sense something, when she swung by later.

*****​

"The dead guy stayed dead. And he was completely human," Vi was reporting, once again occupying part of Beckett's desk. "Perfectly ordinary."

"And yet he had a ritual circle in his living room, a used one," Castle shook his head. "And a working one, according to Dawn."

"Dawn?" Beckett asked.

"A fellow Watcher," Rick explained.

"She had the biggest crush on him, a few years ago, but she was too young," Vi added, smirking. "She was his biggest fan."

"And she grew out of it, years ago." Castle glared at his Slayer. "Of the crush, that is."

"She'd still jump your bones given half a chance."

"And then Buffy would break my bones. Not that I have any intention of sleeping with Dawn." Castle clarified hastily.

"Suuure." Vi's grin widened.

"Anyway," Castle changed the topic before Beckett could get the wrong impression, "Dawn's sure that this kind of ritual wasn't done from memory. So, there have to be some notes around, or - as I suspect - a grimoire." And if those notes or that book were the real deal, they were worth to kill for.

"Anyone with connections to the owners of the building could have entered the apartment with the keys from the concierge." Beckett said.

"Was the victim a member of the mob too?"

"We don't know yet. IT is still trying to reconstruct his finances." Beckett didn't sound too optimistic with regards to that part of the investigation. "But the stubs and receipts found in the dead's wallet indicate that he often frequented a nightclub popular among Russian immigrants."

"Ohh!" Vi perked up.

Castle glared at her. "No beating up the Russian Mafia, Vi! They're not demons."

"Self-defense is allowed!"

"No provoking them either just so you can claim they started it." He knew about that trick, quite popular among Slayers, especially Faith.

"Are you two planning to visit that bar?" Beckett looked from Rick to Vi and back.

The Slayer nodded, grinning.

"How do you expect to find out anything without understanding Russian? Do you think they'll all speak English for you to overhear?"

"Well… " The detective made that part of the plan sound like it wouldn't work.

Beckett rolled her eyes. "Or do you plan to shake down the Bratva for information like you shake down demons?"

That had been the backup plan, not that Castle would admit that. "I was hoping we'd find some demons there, and 'talk' to them." That usually worked.

Beckett closed her eyes. "I've got a mind to let you try that, but if you got killed, the mayor would be unhappy with the captain, and he'd be unhappy with me."

"Your concern for our health is overwhelming, detective," Castle said, slightly cross. As if she didn't really care about him!

"Yes, it is. Astonishing too." The detective sighed. "I just know I will regret this, but it is our best lead, and I doubt walking in there with a badge will do much good."

"We're going undercover then?" Castle asked. That sounded interesting.

"Me and her. I to eavesdrop on the Russians, she to sniff out demons."

"I'm rich and famous. I can visit any nightclub without looking suspicious." Castle grinned. As if he'd let the two women go there alone.

"True," Beckett conceded.

"So, Operation Undercover is a go!" Castle declared. "Vi can be my arm-candy. What will be your cover identity? I've got two arms!" And it would be great to see the detective in a sexy cocktail dress, again.

"I do not think it would be smart to go together," Beckett stated, rolling her eyes. "That way, if one of us gets into trouble, the others are not compromised."

"You sound as if you expect us to get into trouble."

Beckett didn't say anything, but her expression told Castle that this was exactly what she was expecting.

The woman had no faith in him. He'd prove her wrong!

 

[rtds9fan]

Well at least I'm getting some happy Caskett stuff here. As far as I'm concerned season 8 of the show so far been a big pile of crap.

Any hoo the getting Vi off her desk bit cracked me up.

Next chapter. .....demon mafia?.....why not? Michelle Trachtenberg did grow up to be tall and beautiful. ....must have been hard on Rick to turn her down.

Stripper Nikki. ......Kate should know better than go there lol

 

[Ack]

Why do I predict trouble? Wait, it's Castle.

 

[Starfox5]

New York, September 2009

"You know, I almost wish we'd get to wear a wire. Using our phones seems so… normal," Richard Castle said while checking if his smartphone, slightly enhanced by Willow, was fully charged.

"We're not exactly about to enter a secret meeting of mob members, so no one will ask for our smartphones," Beckett said, shaking her head at him.

"I still wonder where you'll be stashing yours though. That dress doesn't seem to let you carry a credit card, much less a phone." He didn't quite leer at her, though he wanted to - the cocktail dress she was wearing looked like she had been poured into it.

"Purses exist for a reason." Sighing, she smoothed the dress out. "That's what the kind of young, immigrant girls visiting that club are wearing. Trust me, I'd rather wear something a bit more…"

"... decent?" He grinned.

She glared at him. "I was about to say classy, thank you."

"But you had that indecent dress already," Vi got a dig in with barely-hidden glee.

"Remnants of my rebellious youth," Beckett grinned, if a bit forcedly, at the Slayer, who was wearing a very similar-looking dress which Castle had paid for in the afternoon. "Though since it still fits me perfectly, I don't see the need to spend money on another slutty dress."

That made Vi frown. "We'll have to introduce you to Faith! You'll hit it off!"

Castle coughed. "No, we don't!" He turned to Beckett. "Faith is the second-oldest - second-most experienced - Slayer and she dresses rather provocatively."

"Which you'd call 'slutty'!" Vi added.

Castle glared at his Slayer. "And she's got a penchant for violence."

"I thought every Slayer is prone to using violence," Beckett raised her eyebrows.

"Well, they are…" Castle ignored Vi's "No, we're not!" and continued: "... but Faith is kind of… exceptional. The other Slayers fear her."

"No, we don't!" Vi put her hands on her hip.

"I'll tell her that you said that," Castle retorted, smirking when she faltered.

"We just… respect her. Very much," Vi admitted, sulking.

"Well, noted. But this 'Faith' isn't here, and we've got a nightclub to visit, so how about we focus on that for a bit? I am sure there will be ample opportunities to indulge in sharing scary Slayer stories later."

She obviously didn't get how scary Faith was, Castle thought. But she had a point.

"Why are you posing as an immigrant anyway? Wouldn't it be better if the mobsters didn't know you spoke Russian? They might let their guard down around us."

"They would wonder why three Americans are visiting the club, and probably keep a closer eye on us," beckett explained. "Especially if one of them is a famous author."

"So, we're to be the distraction then."

"Exactly. I'll ask around after our dead man, see if anyone knows him. Just play the fool and his arm candy." Beckett smiled. "If anyone asks, claim you heard about the club from a fan. Please try to not start a riot for an hour or two."

"Hey! I've never started a riot!" He had done a lot, but that particular achievement had eluded him so far.

"And we've only set fire to, like… five demon bars!" Vi wasn't helping.

"You're not taking your flamethrower with you!" Beckett glared at them.

"Of course not!" He'd leave it in his car. Just in case.

*****​

The nightclub - Hotel Moscow - didn't look impressive from the outside. If not for the groups of underdressed smoking people outside, and the two hulking bouncers at the door, the entrance would have looked like it belonged to an office building.

Castle and Vi waited in the car while Beckett went in first. Rick had to admit to himself that the detective was almost unrecognizable with her blonde wig, makeup, and that slutty dress that drew the attention far away from her face. Though he didn't think complimenting Beckett for the fact that she could pull off 'looking like a call girl' very well would go over well. He really hoped Vi would not make a comment about that.

"If I didn't know she was a cop, I'd ask for her rates. Do you think she worked for Vice before she became a detective?"

And there went that hope. Maybe she'd not mention it to Beckett. And pigs would fly - without Andrew messing up a ritual. "You'd ask for her rates?"

"It's just an expression to say she looks like a professional, you know." Vi glared at him. "Don't get any ideas."

"Perish the thought!" But there'd be an undercover mission in his next book. Definitely.

The detective passed the bouncers without trouble. Castle didn't think they'd even took a look at her face. Understandable, really.

"How long do we wait?" Vi had that whiny undertone already. Slayers and patience didn't go hand in hand at all, to the detriment of their Watchers.

"At least a quarter of an hour," Castle said. It would feel like an hour, of course. Vi was already fidgeting. "You're usually not quite that impatient."

"I just don't like letting her go first."

"Ah." And that explained it. Slayer competitiveness. He often wondered how Xander managed to handle a dozen of the girls. Without getting killed as collateral damage.

"They didn't frisk her. I'll be able to slip in my blades. You gonna pack your Glock?"

He didn't comment on the fact that she would have an easier time concealing weapons with a slightly longer skirt. He blamed Buffy and Faith for the predominant 'Slayer style'. "No. I think I'll be safer as the famous clueless author."

"Don't worry. I'll keep you safe." Vi patted his arm.

"That would be more reassuring if you didn't have to keep me safe from trouble you started at least half the time."

"Hey!"

He smirked at her outraged reaction. Two minutes down, thirteen more to go.

*****​

Castle and Vi got a bit more attention from the bouncers, as Beckett had predicted. Mostly Castle though - Vi got the kind of attention any pretty girl wearing a too short skirt and too tight top would get. He smiled at the bouncers. "Richard Castle. You may have heard of me. I've certainly heard of this club!" They didn't recognize him, but they did recognize a hundred bucks, and waved him through with a smile. Money was the universal language.

The place was packed full of people dancing, drinking and flirting. Judging by the smell, they didn't really enforce the ban on smoking inside clubs, and he doubted they qualified for an exception. He saw Vi wrinkle her nose, and raised his eyebrows at her. She met his eyes, and nodded. So there was a demon nearby. That didn't have to mean anything, of course. But he'd bet it did.

It was almost impossible to find a demon or two in such a crowd though, apart from personally checking everyone out. And that wouldn't end up that well in this place either. Not even for a pretty girl like Vi.

So the two of them made their way to the bar while he tried to spot Beckett. He had no success though.

"Cop ten o'clock, cozying up to a slimeball," Vi whispered, leaning with her back against the bar next to him.

Rick slowly turned his head, and spotted Beckett, laughing next to some ugly brute of a gangster who was staring down her dress. The man had a face that just begged to be introduced to Castle's, or better, Vi's fists.

Castle turned towards the bartender, smiling and ordering a Bloody Mary for himself, and a cola for Vi. A generous tip followed.

"They're talking in Russian," Vi said.

"Well, that was to be expected. But does he seem to be buying her act?" Castle slowly leaned a bit closer to Vi, with a wide smile pasted on his face.

"He seems to be buying her drinks, at least," Vi answered.

Castle glanced over. "Well, so far so good." He took the rest of the room in. "This looks like a nice club, actually. If not for the fact that it's owned by the mob."

"Mister Castle?"

Rick turned towards the man who had just approached him. 'Thug' was the first impression. But he looked friendly. And Castle had a role to play. "Yes, that's me! Are you a fan of my books?"

"Ah, I must confess I barely find the time to read the newspapers, these days. Work, you understand. But I recognized you from my girlfriend's magazine. I am Petar Kusmich, and this is Natasha." The man pointed at girl next to him. She was pretty, young, and beaming at Rick.

"Pleased to meet you. This is Vi," Castle presented the Slayer.

Kusmich bent to kiss Vi's hand, displaying remarkable manners for a gangster. At least as far as Castle thought - his knowledge of the Russian Mafia might be a tad lacking, he realized. He knew far more about Russian monsters than mobsters. "Work?"

"I own the club." The Russian smiled and made a sweeping gesture. "Where did you hear of it, if I may ask?"

"It's a bit of an embarrassing story, so I trust your discretion," Castle said, leaning forward. "I met a pretty fan of mine at a vernissage, and we got in a drinking contest that turned out not to be any contest. The girl drank me under the table. She mentioned this club, which is the only thing I recall of that evening." He held up his glass. "I've been training since then, to offer her a better challenge in case we meet again, and where better than here?"

Kusmich laughed loudly. "A hard drinking man, I like that."

"More like working hard at drinking, still." Castle had the distinct feeling that he was about to be played, but no idea in what way.

"Do you play poker, by chance?" Ah, that way.

"I've been known to play a few hands with colleagues of mine. Fellow writers. But our schedules don't line up too often."

"Would you be interested in a little game?" Kusmich asked, eyes glinting.

Castle smiled back. "Definitely!" Playing poker with Russian mafiosi? Who could resist that? And since it wasn't Kitten Poker, he wouldn't be saddled with either a basket full of meowling animals, or a reproachful look from his family for letting kittens get eaten. Win win.

"Let me show you a more private room then, Mister Castle."

"Call me Rick!"

They were passing closer to the table Beckett was getting leered at by that brute when Castle froze. The concierge of the victim's condo was there, a few meters away, and pointing at the detective. That was very bad!

"That's a demon," Vi whispered.

And that was worse!

 

[rtds9fan]

Side note.... I met Eliza Dushku once at a con. She was just as beautiful in person and a very friendly person to fans.

I cracked up over the "They're scared of Faith" comment lol. Super strength, extremely beautiful and just a whole lot of dangerous. What's not to love about her? Lol

Just like the show Castle's money and fame can get them into place.....and into trouble lol

 

[Ack]

Side note.... I met Eliza Dushku once at a con. She was just as beautiful in person and a very friendly person to fans.

I cracked up over the "They're scared of Faith" comment lol. Super strength, extremely beautiful and just a whole lot of dangerous. What's not to love about her? Lol

Just like the show Castle's money and fame can get them into place.....and into trouble lol

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I met Felicia Day at a convention. Got a photo with her and everything. She's very nice to talk to. Awesome experience all round.

 

[Pensive Rumination]

I met Felicia Day at a convention. Got a photo with her and everything. She's very nice to talk to. Awesome experience all round.

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Huh...so today I learned that Vi's an actual Buffy character and not an OC. Guess it just goes to show that reading lots of Buffy fanfiction can't quite equal having watch the show itself.

"I don't think so. That would be the first case of a rising after a burial at sea. Sort of." Rupert would be ecstatic about such a novel case. "I'd suspect an exotic demon at work. Unless it was just adrenaline and luck."

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"This"

She was probably jealous that a Watcher hadn't to follow the same rules as a cop.

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"didn't have"

He took pictures of the scene, and mailed it to London. Beckett didn't comment.

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"e-mailed". I tend to associate 'mailed' with the old paper and pen method. Or something covered in chainmail.

He turned to Beckett. "Did you see any book? Old, leather bound, maybe." That kind of ritual wasn't done from memory.

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Missing pluralisation.
"This"

Maybe Vi would sense something, when she would swing by later.

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"swung"

Wouldn't it be better if the mobsters didn't know you spoke Russian, and would let their guard down around us?"

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"maybe they'd let their guard down around us?" works better I think.

"They would wonder why three Americans visit the club, and probably keep a closer eye on us,"

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"why three Americans are visiting the club"...makes sense if you read the original in a Russian accent though...

So I'm just wondering if these supernatural related cases are all back to back? Cause if they are then they seems a little SOD breaking...have there been any throwaway mentions of any skipped 'boring non-demony murder cases'? Kate also seems a little to quick to jump on the 'demons did it' bandwagon at times, but that could be ruled as her just being a little overly cautious.

 

[Starfox5]

Huh...so today I learned that Vi's an actual Buffy character and not an OC. Guess it just goes to show that reading lots of Buffy fanfiction can't quite equal having watch the show itself.

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Vi appears in a number of stories as well, but those are set after the series ended.

(typos)

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Thanks! I corrected them.

"e-mailed". I tend to associate 'mailed' with the old paper and pen method. Or something covered in chainmail.

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I changed it to "sent them". For me, "Mail" is associated with e-mail - I think "versenden" when talking about the other kind of mail

"maybe they'd let their guard down around us?" works better I think.

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Changed to "They might let their guard down around us."

"why three Americans are visiting the club"...makes sense if you read the original in a Russian accent though...

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Corrected.

So I'm just wondering if these supernatural related cases are all back to back? Cause if they are then they seems a little SOD breaking...have there been any throwaway mentions of any skipped 'boring non-demony murder cases'? Kate also seems a little to quick to jump on the 'demons did it' bandwagon at times, but that could be ruled as her just being a little overly cautious.

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There's about one suspicious case per month, hence the dates in the title. I might add some referals to non-demony cases, if that is a bit unclear. Kate's in the "demons are real, and all around us" phase still, and overreacts a bit.

 

[Starfox5]

New York, September 2009

Richard Castle was in a bind. The thug had stopped leering at Beckett and was now glaring at her instead. Two more gangsters were on the way, attracted by the commotion, and the demon-concierge - was that like a gatekeeper of hell, he briefly wondered - had gripped the detective's arm.

He was unarmed - mostly, he still had a stake up his sleeve - with Vi only carrying a few knives, but they could take those men and Kusmich. But there were too many people around. Too many witnesses, and potential victims of stray shots - he didn't doubt the the Russians would hesitate to shoot. So he put a hand on Vi's arm when he saw the Slayer tense, met Beckett's eyes for a fraction of a second, and steered his Slayer after Kusmich. The man had just briefly stopped and glanced at the scene with the detective before continuing towards the door in the back. The same door, so Castle thought, the gangsters would drag Beckett through as well.

Perfect. Or close to it. He wasn't that picky.

Kusmich was walking a bit faster. The man probably wanted to get them into the poker room before the thugs dragged Beckett into the torture room. Natasha easily matched his stride, despite her six inch heels. Castle risked a subtle glance - Beckett was now cornered by three thugs, and one demon, and they were obviously waiting.

Kusmich reached the backdoor, nodding at the guard there. That man was very tall, and his muscles would make Schwarzenegger jealous. Castle looked at Vi, but she wasn't showing any reaction, so it was probably steroids, and not demonic blood.

They passed the door - thick, sturdy, and sound-proof as well, since as soon as it closed, Castle couldn't hear the music from the club anymore. Which worked both ways. Kusmich started to talk again. "Welcome to our private rooms…" was as far as he got before Vi punched him in the gut, doubling him over. She withdrew her fist, holding a pistol, and handed it to Castle while dropping the gangster with a blow to the neck. Castle didn't recognize the model, but as he racked the slide, a 9 mm cartridge fell out. It'd do.

Natasha was staring at them, her mouth open, while Vi hefted the man up and dropped him a few meters to the side, in front of another door. "Don't mind us. Demon hunting in progress," Castle said, smiling. The girl gasped and started to run away. Or tried to - she stumbled and fell, then kicked her heels off before scrambling away on bare feet.

"You've got to work on your smiles, Rick," Vi commented, taking up a position next to the door.

"I think it was the gun. It doesn't look as nice as my usual one," Rick retorted, and matched her on the other side, gun held at his side.

Just in time - the door was opened again, and the first thug walked in, followed by the two goons dragging Beckett between them. That meant the demon was bringing up the rear.

"Freeze!" Castle said, pointing the gun at the lead thug. The man froze, cursing under his breath.

That was as far as things went according to plan, though. Castle heard a croaking noise, and something slimy wrapped around his arm and hand, ripping the gun out of his grip. He turned his head and saw that it was an elongated tongue the demon had shut out of his suddenly far too wide mouth. Vi slammed the door into the demon, stunning it, and Castle went for the gun, only to be tackled by the lead thug.

The gangster hit him like a freight train, bowling the author over and rolling over the ground. Rick managed to shield his head, but a few blows hit his stomach, almost making him lose his meal. He managed to hit the man back, but the thug didn't seem to feel his blows, at all. One hand closed around his throat, and he had trouble breathing. With the man straddling him, he couldn't get to his stake. In desperation, he groped around for the gun, it had to be around here somewhere… his fingers closed around something smooth… it wasn't the gun, it was one of Natasha's heels!

He hit the thug throttling him with it, several times, until the man let go of his throat with a pained yell, and pressed a hand to his bleeding ear. Coughing, Rick saw the man straddling him had pulled back a bit, out of reflex probably, and hit him in the groin with his makeshift weapon. The thug choked, then whimpered and rolled off Castle.

Panting, Castle was about to look for the pistol once more, but a shot made him freeze up.

"никому не двигаться!"

Beckett was standing there, gun in hand. She'd lost her shoes too, and her dress had seen better days as well. But the two guys who had been holding her were down, one moaning and gripping his groin while staring wide-eyed at the tongue-demon, the other was knocked out and bleeding, sprawled in a heap below a suspicious dent in the wall. Vi was wrapped in demon frog tongue, but seemed to have gotten the upper hand - the monster was looking rather battered, and the tongue seemed to have lost its tension. Her clothes were a lost cause though.

As far as fights went, this had gone well.

While Beckett kept the gun trained on the semi-conscious Russians, Castle frisked them, finding three more pistols, and Vi unwrapped herself from the demon tongue, muttering about slime, clothes and spas owed to her. Everything was back to normal then.

Castle coughed a few times until he was sure his voice was working properly still, then addressed the demon. "Now… we have a few questions. What do you know about Alexei Ivanovich Berezin?"

"я трахну вашу мать!

Castle didn't know Russian, but that hadn't sounded helpful, or polite. "Let me introduce my charming friends here. This is, as you probably know already, Detective Beckett. She's armed and got a temper. And this is Vi, the resident Slayer of New York. You just ruined her favorite outfit. We can do this the easy way, or the hard way."

The other thugs were still staring at the demon, as if they had never seen him before. They probably hadn't. The frog-tongue-demon itself started talking rapidly once Vi hefted him up with one hand. Unfortunately, he was talking in Russian. At least Beckett looked like she understood most of it.

*****​

"So… the demon concierge was working with the victim on a ritual to make him tougher and stronger, but didn't kill him. The victim was afraid of some unnamed other Russian gangsters. And the tome they used for the ritual is missing." Castle summed the results up while the three of them were walking back to his car.

"He has an alibi for the time of death, Ryan checked that today already." Beckett checked her recovered phone for new calls and messages.

"It was a suspect?" Castle asked, surprised. "Never mind - of course it was."

"What do you think will happen to the demon?"

"It'll probably run. Those thugs didn't look like they were happy to discover one of them is a monster. Well, a worse monster than gangsters."

"We should have killed it. It ruined my outfit!" Vi growled.

"We don't slay demons for ruining dresses."

"Well, we should! Buffy would agree with me!" The blonde Slayer probably would.

"It was a slutty outfit anyway. No big loss," Beckett commented.

"It's the principle of the thing! If you let them get away with ruining one dress, they'll do it again, and with more expensive and classier dresses too!" Vi pointed at her ruined top. "Plus, this should count as sexual harrassment too!"

Castle was very carefully not looking at what she pointed at. They didn't tell you about that when you joined the Watchers.

*****​

The next morning, Rick was carefully walking into the bullpen of the 12th Precinct. His bruises were hidden by his shirt, but he could feel each spot on his body that the Russian thug had hit, and even breathing hurt a bit. His only consolation was that the guy would be in much more pain - that stiletto heel had done good work.

Vi of course was all fine again, if still a bit mad about the lost outfit. No matter that it had been rather slutty, even by Slayer standards. Not that Castle would say that.

He walked up to Beckett. The detective didn't show any signs of the fight they had been in either, but she looked tired at least, and shot him a grateful smile when he put her coffee down on her desk. "Rough night?" he asked.

"Long night," Beckett answered, with a slight glare. Obviously, she didn't appreciate his attempts to keep up appearances.

"Any further news on the case?" He took a sip from his own coffee. He really should buy the Precinct a coffee maker of their own, for the breaks.

"No, but…" her desk phone rang, interrupting her. She took the call, listened, and Castle could see her face growing hard. "We'll be right there."

She looked at him. "A patrol just found four men, hanging from a tree in the Central park. With an old leather-bound tome placed at their feet."

"Looks like our noose-demon has not left town."

And it was messing with their case.

 

[Ack]

... okay, I hadn't been aware that Felicia Day played Violet. Now I know what face to put to the story, and it has just become at least fifteen percent cooler. Maybe twenty.

However, typo:

"Rough night he asked?"

Click to shrink...

Unless Castle is being facetious, I assume that's meant to be "Rough night?" he asked.

 

[Starfox5]

However, typo:

Unless Castle is being facetious, I assume that's meant to be "Rough night?" he asked.

Click to shrink...

Thanks! Corrected now.

 

[Atropa]

by the led thug.

Click to shrink...

"lead thug" I think?

while stering wide-eyed

Click to shrink...

"staring" most likely.

 

[Starfox5]

"lead thug" I think?

"staring" most likely.

Click to shrink...

Thanks! Corrected.

 

[Slayer Anderson]

And it was messing with their case.

Click to shrink...

Oh, so it's okay when Castle does it, but it's not okay when a vigilante demon (who's doing...pretty much the same thing they would) does it?

Tsk, tsk.

 

[Starfox5]

Oh, so it's okay when Castle does it, but it's not okay when a vigilante demon (who's doing...pretty much the same thing they would) does it?

Tsk, tsk.

Click to shrink...

The demon's killing humans, that's a big no-no.

 

[Ack]

The demon's killing humans, that's a big no-no.

Click to shrink...

Oh god, I want to see this.


Vi kicked the door; it flew off its hinges, crashing into the opposite wall as she followed it in. Castle went to go in next, but he was too slow; Beckett beat him to it. She entered the room in Vi's wake, pistol out and ready. Mentally grumbling about how she was pushing in line, Rick entered the room last.

The demon was there all right; at least, he assumed it was a demon, the way Vi was eyeing it and preparing to unleash some sort of devastating move upon it. The fact that it looked like a normal, if muscular, human male didn't matter much right then. After all, it was holding some sort of weapon, pointing it at Vi. Rick frowned; a demon with a ... a pistol?

Beckett, by sheer habit, brought out her badge as she aimed her own pistol at it. "NYPD! Hold it right there!"

And that was when the demon produced its own badge, to augment the odd-looking pistol. "Department of Extra-Demonic Affairs! You hold it!"

Vi's jaw dropped. "What the hell?"

"Demons have law enforcement?" asked Beckett.

Castle shrugged. "I have no idea."

"Should I kill it?" That was Vi.

"How about instead of killing each other," the demon suggested with heavy sarcasm, "what say we talk instead?"

****

They were seated at an outdoor cafe; all weapons and badges were stowed away, but Vi was as tense as a cat within striking range of a particularly toothsome mouse. Rick shot her another frown; he didn't want her jumping the gun, at least not until this particular mystery had been solved.

"It came to our attention, several hundred years ago," the demon began, sipping at his coffee - he'd used artificial sweetener, the fiend - "that humans from your realm were enabling members of our criminal element to come here and cause havoc."

"So wait," interrupted Beckett. "These demons we've been fighting, they're your criminals?"

"Well, of course," the demon agreed. "It's not like they're particularly law-abiding, right?"

Rick snorted. "That's the understatement of the century."

"Oh, don't get me wrong," the demon hastened to add. "Our laws are different from yours. Less in the way of due process, for instance. And the death penalty's a little more widely applied. Also, torture is kind of a standard procedure during interrogations. But I digress. Over the last decade or so, it's been noticed that more and more humans are pulling demons across for various reasons, and some demons are setting up enclaves here on your world. Which is why the DEDA was formed."

"To police your own?" asked Beckett.

The demon nodded. "Mainly, yes. We're still finding our feet. I'm on special assignment."

"And what's your assignment?" asked Castle.

"To thin out the number of humans who are likely to cause more demons to come over," the demon explained carefully. "To reduce the overall problem, or at least keep it manageable."

"There's just one problem with that," Vi snapped, making her first contribution to the conversation so far. "You're killing humans."

"How is that a problem?" asked the demon reasonably. "You're killing demons. And the humans I'm killing are guilty as, if you'll excuse the term, sin. I'm even using standard human methods of execution. Hell, if you had free rein, you'd be killing them yourselves. Am I right?"

The look on Vi's face, Castle decided, was priceless.

 

[Pensive Rumination]

He was unarmed - mostly, he still had a stake up his sleeve - with Vi only carrying a few knives, but they could take those, and Kusmich.

Click to shrink...

I assume Castle is saying he believes they can take on Kusmich and the thugs? It's a little unclear...maybe, "but they could still take those odds"

Casel heard a croaking noise, and something slimy wrapped around his arm and hand, ripping the gun out of his grip.

Click to shrink...

"Castle"

He turned his head and saw that it was an elongated tongue the demon had shut out of his suddenly far too wide mouth.

Click to shrink...

"shot"

"So… the demon concierge was working with the victim on a ritual to make him tougher(1) and stronger, but hasn't(2) killed him. The victim was afraid of some unnamed other Russian gangsters. And the tome they used for the ritual is missing.

Click to shrink...

(1)Does the 'him' refer to the vic or the demon?
(2)"didn't" seems to work better

 

[Starfox5]

Oh god, I want to see this.
(Snip)

Click to shrink...

Nice one! Can I link to that as an Omake?

I assume Castle is saying he believes they can take on Kusmich and the thugs? It's a little unclear...maybe, "but they could still take those Odds"

Click to shrink...

rewrorded it to "those men and Kusmich".

"Castle"

​

"shot"

Click to shrink...

Corrected those typos.

(1)Does the 'him' refer to the vic or the demon?
(2)"didn't" seems to work better

Click to shrink...

Castle refers to the demon as an "it". Apart from a few mostly friendly exceptions, Watchers and Slayers tend to "dehumanize" demons in my stories that way.

I changed the second part of "didn't kill".

 

[Ack]

Nice one! Can I link to that as an Omake?

Click to shrink...

Absolutely.

 

[Starfox5]

New York, October 2009

There were things a famous author and veteran demon hunter didn't need to encounter in the morning. A gaggle of men in cheap suits taking up space in the bullpen when he brought his muse her morning coffee was one of them.

"So, they declared our noose-vigilante a serial killer, and now the Feds are trying to poach our case?" Richard Castle wasn't happy about the situation. A demon on the loose was bad enough, but that demon attracting the FBI's attention - and not even the attention of the agents who knew about the supernatural - was worse. But worst was that among the agents that had arrived at the Precinct to take over was Special Agent Sorenson.

"Shh. They can hear you." Detective Beckett made a shushing notion at him before the men in suits turned their attention to them. At least Beckett didn't sound too happy to see Mister FBI.

"Agent Soso! Nice to meet you again!" Castle beamed at the man.

"It's Sorenson, Mister Castle." The agent didn't smile in return.

"Oh, excuse me. I was thinking of the character in my next book." Castle noted with well-hidden satisfaction that that made the agent twitch and Beckett grin, briefly.

"Book?" A tall, lanky agent who had been following Sorenson asked. Smiling, he introduced himself. "Agent Clapton."

"I'm Richard Castle. You might have heard of me." Rick smiled back.

"He's an author who's following the detective around in the hope of getting inspiration for his fantasy novels," Sorenson cut in.

"Bestselling author, thank you," Castle corrected the agent. "He'll be a bumbling agent in my next book, messing up the work of the main character, the smart and sassy detective dealing with demonic cases."

"And I'm Vi, his bodyguard and driver." His Slayer beamed at the agents. She didn't seem to mind that their expressions pretty much showed they thought she was Castle's lover. Well, Sorenson's expression probably showed his opinion of Castle's work more than that of Rick's private life.

"This is now a federal investigation, Mister Castle. Whatever deal you have made with the city's mayor doesn't matter anymore." Sorenson glared at Rick. "And if I find you sniffing around our scenes I'll have you arrested and tried for obstruction of justice."

"Oh, do not worry. I'm busy researching an old case from the 19th century. A vigilante who hung his victims from trees. I'm going with the hypothesis that he returned from the dead to continue his crusade against criminals who escaped the law." Rick waited until the agent drew breath to answer him, then continued: "For my next book, of course." Then he leaned forward, and his smile slipped while he lowered. "And should you try to keep me from researching a historical case that's 150 years old, then I'll bury you. With my lawyer. He managed to get the better of two of my ex-wives' lawyers, an agent trying to restrict me from researching ancient history for petty reasons won't even be a challenge."

Vi snickered, having heard him despite the distance. Beckett grimaced, but acted as if she hadn't heard it. Agent Clapton hadn't heard it - he had been busy checking Vi's permits. And, apparently, talking shop about guns. Castle had thought he had heard the remains of a faint Texan accent…

"Anyway… we'll be off this 'federal case' now, Agent," Castle grinned at him, then turned to smile to Beckett. "We're still on for the evening, I hope. I'm thinking Italian, there's this new spaghetti recipe… to die for. I'll tell you all about the next book too." Glancing back at the FBI agent, he added: "Before you blow a gasket: All we'll be talking about are demons and other supernatural stuff. You should know that Kate wouldn't be as unprofessional as to compromise a case and risk a killer getting away for personal reasons."

Beckett opened her mouth, then closed it again. "Ah, of course. Around eight?" Of course she had understood what he had been implying. She was brilliant, after all.

Beaming, he said "Splendid! I'm sure you'll be dressed to kill, as usual."

"Oh, of course."

Now that kind of smile had too many teeth for his taste. And health.

*****​

"You know, the detective will kill you for implying you're in a relationship in front of her ex;" Vi mused, back in the Shelby.

"I'm sure she'll understand that we've got a demon to catch and can't afford to let Agent Testosteroneson's insecurities interfere with that," Castle said, with slightly more confidence than he felt.

"She might delay the execution then, until the case is over." Vi snorted. "I call dibs on your blades."

"Good enough. By then, she'll have calmed down." And maybe also have finally been won over by his ruggedly handsome charm. "And Alexis gets first pick."

"I'm not sure if you're far too optimistic about the detective, or too pessimistic about our chances to catch the demon. Probably both." Vi shook her head.

Castle didn't deign that with an answer. "We need to get our hands on Dr. Burton's estate. He might have information about how this demon was summoned or created in the first place."

"Isn't that still sealed up by the courts?"

"Until Miller's heirs have settled their dispute, yes." Which could take years, given the amount of money involved.

"Oh, goodie. I get to be a catburglar again!" Vi grinned.

"We will get to be catburglars," Castle corrected her. Vi was smarter than she acted - another legacy Buffy would have to answer for, one day - but she hadn't his experience in sifting through books. He'd been a librarian for ten years after all, and they couldn't steal all the books and sort out the relevant ones later. They had to do that on-site.

"You? You're not a catburglar. More like a dogburglar. You know, slightly clumsy, not as elegant or smart as a cat, loud…"

"Are you quite finished?"

"Let me think… "

"That was a rhetorical question."

"Oh, touchy!"

Castle sighed. Rupert had been right - Watchers got no respect from their Slayers. He blamed Buffy, again.

*****​

"What were you thinking, insinuating that we were a couple?"

Detective Beckett arrived at eight, as beautiful as ever, and, sadly, quite annoyed. At Castle too.

"Good evening, Detective." He took her coat and hung it on the rack. She was wearing a dress under it, which was a surprise. Before he could comment on that though, she noticed where his eyes had been straying to.

"That's just to help keep up that cover you forced on me."

"Ah. Quite ingenious, wasn't it?"

"Annoying is the word you're looking for."

"Oh, come on - being mistaken for my girlfriend is hardly a hardship. Just look at Vi." He pointed at his Slayer, who was busy in the kitchen polishing off the hors-d'oeuvres not already on the couch table. "Hey!"

Vi stuffed the last canape into her mouth with a grin with just the slightest hint of guilt. Alexis, already sitting on the couch, just shrugged her shoulder - she had long since stopped trying to keep Vi from 'surplus food', as the Slayer called anything not already served.

"You always tell people she's not your girlfriend."

"And they never believe me anyway." He frowned for an instant. "It can't be Esposito or Ryan; they know better than to tease you. So… Sorenson?"

Sighing, Kate sat down and grabbed a salmon canape. "Hello Alexis." She nodded at the girl. "He told me not to come. When I refused, he tried to order me not to."

It took an effort for Castle not to grin as he sat down in a seat himself. That had been a very big mistake of the agent - trying to order Beckett around? The headstrong detective hated that.

Kate narrowed her eyes at him. "No comment?"

He shook his head. "I prefer to let stupidity speak for itself."

"That's new," Kate commented.

"Since when?" Vi yelled back from the kitchen. Of course she would have overheard that.

"Dad?" Even his own daughter sounded honestly surprised.

"Hey!" He acted all wounded, but noted with pleasure that the detective laughed at that. Her face softened for a moment, losing that hint of bitterness and grim stubbornness.

Vi joined them carrying a tray of drinks. Non-alcoholic ones. "So, did the agent act all macho-viking?"

"No," Beckett shook her head. "He was all about rules and regulations and how that meant he could tell me what to do in my private time."

"He actually thought you would be unprofessional?" Castle was surprised. Maybe the fed didn't know his ex as well as Rick had thought.

"Thank you for the vote of confidence, but you are aware that we're about to break those regulations, aren't you?" Beckett raised her eyebrows at him.

"Only if the FBI actually made headway in the case. Which I doubt, since they're looking for a human killer."

"They're looking for Miller's helper."

"Oh." Maybe Soandson was a bit more capable than Castle had thought. Or lucky. Or it was Clapton. "That might make breaking into Miller's house a bit more difficult."

"What?!"

If Beckett had been drinking, Castle would now be wearing orange juice.

 

[rtds9fan]

God you have no idea how happy I am to see an update. Sadly this story is one of my only few happy outlets from the horror of season 8.

Agent Soso.....lol he was just as bad on the show lol.

 

[Starfox5]

God you have no idea how happy I am to see an update. Sadly this story is one of my only few happy outlets from the horror of season 8.

Agent Soso.....lol he was just as bad on the show lol.

Click to shrink...

Sorry for the lack of the regular updates - been sick over the weekend. Regular service should resume Thursday.

 

[Starfox5]

New York, October 2009

The detective had calmed down after her initial overreaction to a little breaking and entering. The new recipe - which was to die for - had helped with that.

Richard Castle smiled winningly. "It's not as we're actually breaking the law. We've got a right to investigate, we're just … ah… circumventing red tape in the name of …"

"...not wanting to bother with going through the proper channels?" Beckett said.

"... I was about to say 'keeping the needed secrecy'." Rick didn't quite pout. But he felt like it.

"Really. And it's not because breaking into a sealed house makes for a better story than filing a request to examine the contents?"

"Perish the thought!" Castle put his right hand on his heart. "I'd never jeopardize our sacred duty for such selfish reasons!"

The detective raised her eyebrows at him.

"Ah, you should have heard the old Council. All full of pathos and duty. After ten years, some stuck with me, I'm afraid."

She didn't look like she bought that, but didn't pursue the matter. He counted that as a win.

"He's just very fond of dramatic expression." Vi smirked.

Rick coughed. "Anyway. The other reason why we're doing this slightly unorthodoxically is that going through the proper channels takes too much time. The bureaucracy at the FBI is a bit slow despite the importance of our task."

"Does the FBI have a demon hunting team?" Beckett asked, in a voice that seemed torn between fascination and horror.

"Not like that. But there are a number of people in the Bureau who are aware of the supernatural," Rick explained.

"Some of them even got demon blood," Vi added. That didn't seem to please the detective at all.

"I suspect that is the cause of the occasional … delay … we encounter when going through our proper backchannels." Rick sighed. "The fact that instead of one Slayer there are now hundreds did kind of scare a number of peaceful demons too."

"Why would that be the case?"

Vi grinned widely. "They think we're always just one second away from slaying them.

"They're not entirely wrong though. Slayers got the urge to slay. Demons, that is. Of course, they control themselves around the non-violent demons, but I could imagine that demons and half-demons would be a bit nervous around a Slayer."

"That's just their guilty consciences!" Vi chuckled.

Beckett frowned. "They are scared of you, and you find that funny?"

Vi nodded. "Yes!"

Rick coughed before things could get tense. Tenser. "Anyway. I would simply buy the notes, but I fear Detective Sonoton would not take well to such an offer and would interfere."

Beckett nodded. "He doesn't like you."

"Why wouldn't he? Must be jealous," Rick nodded. He ignored the detective's eye-rolling and how Vi giggled at what Beckett must have said under her breath. Many men would feel threatened by a famous, ruggedly handsome and rich author. If Detective Soso knew Castle was also a veteran demon hunter, he'd probably have an aneurism. "As you can see, we're practically forced to break into the house if we want to avoid further loss of life."

Beckett didn't look that convinced, but she didn't voice any further objections.

*****​

"You know, even a dog would have been a bit quieter than you," Vi whispered.

"Says the girl with supernatural stealth and hearing," Castle spat out after hauling himself over the wall surrounding Miller's house. "Besides, there's no one around. It's not as if this building is under surveillance."

"I still say we should have used the detective as a distraction."

"That would make her an accomplice. Even if she would have agreed to that - and I doubt she would have - it wouldn't have been fair. If we get caught we'll get bailed out. If she gets caught she'll lose her career."

"Good point. We don't want another amateur demon hunter around to keep from getting killed," Vi whispered into her headset while she scrambled up the wall to the balcony. Both were clad in the classic black turtlenecks and slacks associated with catburglars everywhere.

"She could hire on with us." That would be a nice development, Rick thought.

"And you'd be her boss."

That wouldn't be that nice. Castle doubted that Beckett was the type to have an affair with her boss. She was rather the type who'd vehemently oppose such a relationship. "Good point. One woman with a temper is enough for me to handle."

"Yes... what do you mean?" Vi asked.

"No further questions, your honor." Rick smirked at the silence that followed. He also dodged the end of the rope ladder that was thrown down right at his head rather than gently lowered - sometimes, Vi was just so predictable.

A short climb later, the two were inside the house. According to the list they had from the court, the notes were in the library. Sadly, the list was neither well-organized nor adequately detailed. The old Council would have had Castle's hide had he ever delivered such shoddy work. The new Council… Rupert had been a librarian for years. Not even Buffy crossed him when it came to book-related things.

Rick didn't mind searching the library for an hour or two. That was not problem. The problem was Vi waiting for an hour or two. Slayers didn't have the best attention span to start with, and a bored Slayer was a disaster waiting to happen. Especially in a library. Fortunately, as a veteran Watcher, he was prepared for that. "Vi, since we're already here, go check the house for any remaining demon-related things."

"Gotcha, Rick." Vi nodded and left him to his search. That should keep her busy for half an hour or so. After that… hopefully her cell phone's battery was good enough so she could play a game or watch some series.

*****​

"We've got company coming. The Feds."

"What?" Rick hadn't made much progress. He could tell which shelves and storage boxes the notes were not in.

"Sorenson. I told you, we should have gotten Beckett to honey trap him." Vi walked without making any sound.

"You did nothing of that sort!" Rick whispered while he hastily stored the boxes he had been rifling through.

"Well, I should have! Come on, Rick. They're almost at the door!" Vi grabbed him and started to drag him away. "And try to be a bit more silent this time!" Why were women always telling him that?

But she was correct - when Castle and his Slayer were leaving the library, even he could hear the agents… arguing?

"Why couldn't that have waited until tomorrow?" That was Clapton, complaining.

"It's not as if you had a hot date tonight." That that was Mister Ex-boyfriend.

"Damn, Will! This is about Beckett having a date, right? You're planning to call her as soon as you find something, hoping she'll rush to you?"

Castle would have waited to hear the agent's answer, but Vi dragged him out to the balcony. He was rather certain that Agent Clapton was right on the mark though.

*****​

Back in their car a few blocks over - one of the disposable ones, not his beloved Shelby - Rick shook his head. "I take back what I said about Agent Jealouson competence. If he already made the connection to those notes…"

"He could just be stumbling around in the dark, trying to impress Beckett," Vi said, smirking.

Castle grinned, then realized she was smirking at him. "I'm not doing this to impress the dear detective!"

"Rick, you joined the Watchers to impress a woman. Anything you say to the contrary looks not too convincing after that."

Rick grit his teeth,. Even ten years after his divorce, his first wife was making his life difficult!

*****​

"You almost got caught, and you didn't get the notes?" Beckett sounded even more annoyed than Castle felt. Though she also sounded annoyed at him. He looked at his daughter, who had been keeping the detective company while Vi and Rick had been away, but she just looked at him with a slightly disappointed expression too. Did everyone expect him to be a professional burglar? He just looked the part in his turtleneck!

"Well, it's your fault," Vi said, snacking on a bowl of chips.

"What?" Beckett turned towards the Slayer, and Rick had the sudden, irrational urge to find cover.

"Yeah. Your ex-boyfriend is only working the evening in the hope of finding something that he can call you about, to wreck your imaginary date with Rick." Vi pointed at him with the thumb of her left hand, almost dropping a chip on the carpet.

Beckett blinked. "That's ridiculous!"

"That's what Clapton said."

"And we'd have heard his answer if you hadn't dragged me away," Rick cut in.

"I heard his answer. He denied it, of course. But he was lying."

"Do you honestly expect me to believe that Will would act like, like… Castle?" Beckett stood there, hands on her hips, a small muscle in her face twitching.

Castle couldn't help but smile when her phone started to ring right then.

"A date says this is your not quite that professional agent!"