[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

[AndrewJTalon]

So bad luck or Salem trying to get rid of a SEW early?

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Potentially both. Again, if I was Salem, I would have done a few things to try and get rid of Ruby if I realized she was Summer's daughter.

 

[RustedSands]

*yang and Jaune actually have a conversation*
Yang/Jaune: holy shit! why haven't I been pursuing him/her!

 

[AndrewJTalon]

*yang and Jaune actually have a conversation*
Yang/Jaune: holy shit! why haven't I been pursuing him/her!

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I mean Jaune was a blowhard and a tryhard at the start, until Pyrrha helped him get his head out of his ass. And Yang was a bit self absorbed. So if they had a chance to sit down and talk, it would be interesting. And maybe they'd have a romantic thing or maybe they'd just be friends. It would work.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

While Glynda was metaphorically (and somewhat literally) flaying Ozpin alive, Isabel took Willow aside to have some coffee in an outdoor cafe. They watched the violence unfold as they sipped their lattes.

"Honestly, she really does have a lot of issues, always did," Isabel observed.

"Not like we can talk," Willow sighed, "Half your children ran away from you."

"They didn't run away from me," Isabel growled, shaking her fist furiously, "They went to pursue their different dreams from what I wanted for them! And anyway, two of your children ran away! That's two thirds! I'm still doing better than you!"

Willow looked even more depressed, staring into the depths of her coffee. Isabel frowned, the mood shifting away from wild anime slapstick.

"Willow?"

Willow sighed harder.

"You know... If I'd married Nick, my father would have had a hard time accepting him... But he would have eventually. My father never fully approved of Jacques. I thought he was being overly protective. Jacques was so warm and charming..."

She scowled.

"Turns out he was a bastard. A total bastard!"

Isabel frowned.

"How... Big of a bastard?" She asked cautiously. Willow glared at her.

"What do you care?"

"Willow, I'll admit," Isabel said carefully, "I am EXTREMELY irritated with you for still carrying a torch for my husband all these years but..." She shrugged. "I did want you to be happy. With someone else. Anyone else."

Willow sighed.

"Well..."

Five Minutes Later

Isabel rose, her eyes blazing with fire.

"THAT SON OF A BITCH!" She swore.

Willow gaped in shock.

"Y-You believe me?!"

"You are a worse liar than Nick! You have this twitch when you-ANYWAY!" Isabel glared. "That's just not right!"

Willow bowed her head.

"It's my fault, too. I fell into despair and ignored my own children-"

"Well, you're here aren't you?! You're not drunk!" Isabel cried. She grabbed Willow by the shoulders and pulled her up to her feet. "You're making a lot of progress!"

"Actually it's because Klein bullied and guilted me into being out here," Willow sighed, but her eyes narrowed. "But you're right! I've done nothing for far too long! I... I need to be more like you and your husband!"

"Yes!" Isabel declared. "We're going to help you, Willow! Both of us, together!"

Willow's eyes sparkled.

"Then, will you let me have Nick-?!"

"LIKE HELL!" Isabel shouted, bonking Willow over the head.

"OWWWWW! Why do you have to be so rough?!" Willow whined.

Klein appeared at his mistress's side, and handed her an ice bag.

"Doctor Arc is a very direct kind of person, Mistress," Klein said, "It is how she handles things."

"Damn straight!" Isabel smirked. "It's how I got my husband and my hospital! Totally direct!"

Glynda walked up, deadpan expression firmly in place, as a contrite Ozpin followed behind her.

"This from the woman who denied she had any romantic feelings for her future husband for years."

"I DIDN'T DENY THEM!" Isabel growled. "I-I was just waiting for the right moment and kept any thirsty whores away from him!"

Ozpin adjusted his glasses... Then realized they were no longer on his face. Indeed, given where Glynda had put them, pushing them up any further was a bad idea.

"As I recall, Isabel, you very publicly proclaimed, and I quote, 'Nick Arc is too stupid to be my boyfriend. He is too stupid to be anyone's boyfriend. You're not taking advantage of my idiot partner.' Unquote."

Isabel flushed a bit.

"W-Well... It was true!"

"More like you were hording him for yourself," Glynda huffed.

"Well! It worked, and you're gonna be a single childless hag who puts baby clothes on her cats!" Isabel snarled. Glynda's eyesbrows twitched, as every stepped away from the two blondes.

"Stuffy arrogant witch doctor!"

"Lonely spinster!"

"You don't even need glasses! You just wore them to look smart!"

"Look who's talking! At least I AM smart and don't pretend to be!"

Ozpin sighed again.

"I'm going to have to halve the coffee budget again, aren't I?"

"Based upon how much damage they did the last time they fought? Probably," Klein observed. "Ice pack, sir?"

"Thank you. I desperately need one."

"For your balls-?"

"That was implied!"

 

[RustedSands]

Klein: you know sir I don't believe i've ever met someone as flexible as you
Ozpin: what do you mean by that?
Klein: I mean its impressive how you manage to stick your foot in your mouth while your head is up your own rear
Ozpin: ....very funny

 

[SharkCultist]

Had a weird idea that Jaune gets to meet the FIRST Arc.

Jaune: so you're my....?

Johan: let's just say Great Grandpa.

Jaune: how the hell do you speak in capital? Also, you barely look old enough to drink.

Johan: I'm special.

Jaune: right. Totally. *Discreetly calls Ozpin about the crazy man*

*Ozpin steps out from behind a pillar*

Ozpin: No mr.arc he's actually serious and correct.

Jaune: what?

Ozpin: meet Johan Arc, the world's only Axolotl Faunus. Who also has a mutated aura. No shield but rapid healing. And his semblance? Also healing.

Johan: yeah pretty weird luck of the draw with that.

Jaune: so how old is he?

Johan/Ozpin: yes.

 

[Sir_Gaea]

I mean Jaune was a blowhard and a tryhard at the start, until Pyrrha helped him get his head out of his ass. And Yang was a bit self absorbed. So if they had a chance to sit down and talk, it would be interesting. And maybe they'd have a romantic thing or maybe they'd just be friends. It would work.

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It could be funny if (in a timeline without the Fall of Beacon) Jaune and Yang were to become traveling Hunters exploring the world with what their motorcycles can carry. Somewhere along the way they become more then partners and the moment Yang or Jaune realize that they are all but married the rest of theor friends respond with 'You just now realized that? Your outfits are coordinated for Oum's sake'

 

[RustedSands]

It could be funny if (in a timeline without the Fall of Beacon) Jaune and Yang were to become traveling Hunters exploring the world with what their motorcycles can carry. Somewhere along the way they become more then partners and the moment Yang or Jaune realize that they are all but married the rest of theor friends respond with 'You just now realized that? Your outfits are coordinated for Oum's sake'

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Nora: you're in a relationship
Yang: what? No of course not.
Ruby: you share a house
Jaune: it saves on rent
Weiss: you have a MARRIAGE certificate
Yang: we did it for the tax breaks
Blake: you have a child together.
Jaune/Yang: ....... Ok maybe you have a point.....

 

[JiggieP]

Nora: you're in a relationship
Yang: what? No of course not.
Ruby: you share a house
Jaune: it saves on rent
Weiss: you have a MARRIAGE certificate
Yang: we did it for the tax breaks
Blake: you have a child together.
Jaune/Yang: ....... Ok maybe you have a point.....

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I like to imagine a scenario where their kid, which got their parents oblivious and single-minded traits, misunderstood what they are talking about marriage certificate and saving money.

Then cue one of those comedy scenario where Dragonslayer's Kid get a marriage certificate with another couple kid (I'm thinking Renora's kid cause they will probably goes along with it) somehow, because they think that they will get more pocket money.

Finally, the parents have to duke it out of course, as in accordance to the funny.

 

[RustedSands]

Finally, the parents have to duke it out of course, as in accordance to the funny.

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Jaune: why are our wives fighting again?
Ren: because Nora said, and I quote "world star". I don't even know what that means. Why is your wife fighting.
Jaune: knowing her? Probably bored.

 

[ArsMagna1337]

After dealing with Blake, RWBY treats Tyrian with kid gloves out of fear that anything they do would be seen as racist. It drives him up the wall.

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Tyrian: Fight me seriously!
Qrow: And get canceled again in the CCTnet? Hell no!

 

[SharkCultist]

Tyrian: Fight me seriously!
Qrow: And get canceled again in the CCTnet? Hell no!

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Tyrian: but the CCT is down you idiots!

*Suddenly there is a physical wave of bloodlust*

Tyrian: oh no.

Ruby: oh yes. Hello misplaced aggression.

*This violence has been censored because it made the brother gods puke*

 

[shinighoul6]

Had a weird idea that Jaune gets to meet the FIRST Arc.

Jaune: so you're my....?

Johan: let's just say Great Grandpa.

Jaune: so how old is he?

Johan/Ozpin: yes.

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Had a thought.
The First Arc is

Spoiler: The Hero's Shade

And Jaune trains under him.

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

I mean Jaune was a blowhard and a tryhard at the start, until Pyrrha helped him get his head out of his ass. And Yang was a bit self absorbed. So if they had a chance to sit down and talk, it would be interesting. And maybe they'd have a romantic thing or maybe they'd just be friends. It would work.

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They've both got fairly serious issues with one or more of their parents.....

Jaune - "My mother is a controlling bitch, and my dad did nothing to stop her!"

Yang - "My biological mom is a dead beat bitch squatting in the woods, attacking random travelers, my dad shut down after she left, and I had to do everything!"

Jaune - "Wanna go out clubbing, and shit talk our parents?"

Yang - *Tosses Jaune a motorcycle helmet* "Hop on the backseat, and don't forget to Yang on!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

A few Dragonslayer related ideas and prompts:



-Expanding on Yang, Ruby and Jaune as childhood friends: Nick and Isabel took in Ruby and Yang after Yang and Ruby nearly got eaten by Grimm. Essentially, Nick would sit Taiyang down and give him two options, as he is a Militia Captain and has some law enforcement authority:



"Tai. I know you love your girls. So you have two options: I can take them in for a while in Radian. They will be safe and fine. You get your shit together, and you get them back when you're ready. As long as you need, Tai. We'll help you as much as we can. Option 2 is I report this to Patch's child services and they handle this. You know what that means. We will still help you get your shit together, but the girls will be out of your hands. What's your decision?"



So Yang and Ruby spend a lot of their childhood with seven sisters and Jaune to play and interact with, the weird old retired badasses and other quirky residents of Radian, and eventually Jaune, Yang and Ruby go to Beacon after Taiyang is able to get Nick and Isabel to loosen up a bit on Jaune. Once he's back in the right headspace.



So Yang and Jaune are childhood friends and gets to experience a large, loving family. She also toughens Jaune up due to her nature.



So when they hit puberty? Yang is not likely to let Jaune go...



-Nana Arturia is in the hospital. It's not necessarily fatal, but Jaune is worried that it is. So he wants to make sure his Nana thinks he's got it together and he's not screwing up. He needs someone to pose as his fiance to make his great-grandmother happy. Due to various circumstances, Yang is the one who agrees (though this could just as easily be Pyrrha, Blake, Ruby or any other love interest since getting to meet one of the greatest warriors who ever lived is a REAL honor).



-Similar situation, except with Yang's Granny Xiao-Long. She needs some guy to pose as her fiance to get her off her back! And Jaune's the one, as Ren (her first choice) was fiercely guarded by Nora.



-Yang wants to win a dance contest held in Vale. Unfortunately it requires a partner. None of her teammates are up to the task... Then she spots Jaune dancing and gets an idea. He'll be her partner!



-Jaune is actually pretty good at math or another subject due to growing up on a farm and being educated to become a doctor. And Yang is failing in a few subjects. So she asks for tutoring, and he gives it. It's better than putting up with Weiss.



-Jaune feels he's just not getting strong enough, fast enough. Pyrrha outright says she will not push him past certain limits. Limits he needs to push. So he asks Yang to train him some, as he knows she won't hold back. And she doesn't.



-Jaune and Yang bond after the fall of Vale due to their losses and trauma. They strive to get better together. Taiyang encourages this, as anything to help his daughter heal is good and he knows he's just not very good at relating emotionally.



-Jaune and Yang do some shifts at the Beacon Daycare. Cute kids bonding ensues!



-Yang and Jaune just visit Radian for a semester break. The rest of their friends will join them but Yang has the most time... And thus the most time alone with Jaune.



-After Vale falls, Taiyang has Yang go train with Isabel Arc. She can handle the psychology, and also help Yang become even stronger. And maybe convince her son to come home and stay for good...

 

[SharkCultist]

-Nana Arturia is in the hospital. It's not necessarily fatal, but Jaune is worried that it is. So he wants to make sure his Nana thinks he's got it together and he's not screwing up. He needs someone to pose as his fiance to make his great-grandmother happy. Due to various circumstances, Yang is the one who agrees (though this could just as easily be Pyrrha, Blake, Ruby or any other love interest since getting to meet one of the greatest warriors who ever lived is a REAL honor).

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Isabel: so when are you telling them that you're here because you ate too many burgers?

Nana: there's no such thing.

Isabel: you had to get your stomach pumped twice.

Nana: hunger is the enemy.

 

[RustedSands]

Jaune and Yang do some shifts at the Beacon Daycare. Cute kids bonding ensues

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The kids insist the princess (yang) kisses the knight (Jaune) at the end of the story during the kids storytime. Meanwhile this is all planned by the kids to get their favorite babysitters together.

 

[Grrrrrrr]

Isabel: so when are you telling them that you're here because you ate too many burgers

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So what's it like when shirou cooks burgers f9r nana? How does he do it?

 

[SharkCultist]

So what's it like when shirou cooks burgers f9r nana? How does he do it?

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He made amazing burgers for dinner then she snuck out to a local dive joint for more cheap greaseball burgers. She may or may not have wiped out their stock.

 

[mgl1206]

-Nana Arturia is in the hospital. It's not necessarily fatal, but Jaune is worried that it is. So he wants to make sure his Nana thinks he's got it together and he's not screwing up. He needs someone to pose as his fiance to make his great-grandmother happy. Due to various circumstances, Yang is the one who agrees (though this could just as easily be Pyrrha, Blake, Ruby or any other love interest since getting to meet one of the greatest warriors who ever lived is a REAL honor).

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Idea: the reason Jaune is so good at cooking is not because of his sisters, no it's because his grandma is a major foodie and he wanted to make her happy.

 

[CILinkz]

What are your thoughts on a bit darker stories? For example Raven raided radian when jaune was a small child and saw her kill his family while he hid, (or only one member). Later on doesnt know what to think about yang when he met her. Would he hate her bc she looks like raven or ignore her/befriend her. Yang wanting to meet her mom and is amiable to her while he lost so much.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

What are your thoughts on a bit darker stories? For example Raven raided radian when jaune was a small child and saw her kill his family while he hid, (or only one member). Later on doesnt know what to think about yang when he met her. Would he hate her bc she looks like raven or ignore her/befriend her. Yang wanting to meet her mom and is amiable to her while he lost so much.

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I am totally fine with darker stories. Write em up!

 

[SharkCultist]

While I'm thinking of fate stuff....

AU where Jaune finds a 5th relic. A grail that grants wishes.

What he doesn't know is it's a trap. The light god gave it the power to grant wishes and the dark god made it grant them in cruel ways.

"You wish to be a hero, to live up to your family legacy and have the whole world know your name. To be a hero. Very well. But to accomplish your dream I will take your dream. You will have no memory of your history or family. Your skills will grow endlessly as will your subconscious need to save others. And like all true heroes you will be cursed to eventually suffer a grisly end."

(And this is definitely going to fuck with his grandparents and family.)

 

[Gur40]

While I'm thinking of fate stuff....

AU where Jaune finds a 5th relic. A grail that grants wishes.

What he doesn't know is it's a trap. The light god gave it the power to grant wishes and the dark god made it grant them in cruel ways.

"You wish to be a hero, to live up to your family legacy and have the whole world know your name. To be a hero. Very well. But to accomplish your dream I will take your dream. You will have no memory of your history or family. Your skills will grow endlessly as will your subconscious need to save others. And like all true heroes you will be cursed to eventually suffer a grisly end."

(And this is definitely going to fuck with his grandparents and family.)

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Ironic idea either or the Tree/Blacksmith and good old Angry Matthew counter this by having the Cat kill Jaune when he's guardian Ruby in the Ever After just in time for her to stomp the Cat in turn the Tree/Blacksmith use Alyx gift to work around Jaune becoming a legend and dying horribly and Angry Mango now has the full power of the Grail so when Jaune returns to Remnant just to piss the Gods he wipes out the Grimm and reincarnate himself

So could have Fate lore f the brother or there Mom/Dad/Tree

 

[Fusion Blaster]

-Nana Arturia is in the hospital. It's not necessarily fatal, but Jaune is worried that it is. So he wants to make sure his Nana thinks he's got it together and he's not screwing up. He needs someone to pose as his fiance to make his great-grandmother happy. Due to various circumstances, Yang is the one who agrees (though this could just as easily be Pyrrha, Blake, Ruby or any other love interest since getting to meet one of the greatest warriors who ever lived is a REAL honor).

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the girls have to make like this to see who gets to meet her first


View: https://youtu.be/EP_LPxh4ieY

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Now that said, while Arturia and Shirou were once some of the strongest warriors on Remnant, they are also very old. They're still nothing to sneeze at but they're also well past their prime. So if they try to fight on the level of Raven and Tyrian and the other big bads? They can match them for a little while... But endurance and stamina are major factors. As are dirty tricks and new technologies.

I'm trying to strike a proper balance between the adults being entirely useless in canon, and competent characters can fix everything. Also, Arturia's biggest asset would be her old political connections. She can hit hard and handle herself against mooks... But the serious bosses of this world would give her trouble. Might even kill her from overexerting herself. Shirou too.

So she would have to surrender to the inevitable and let the new generation take over. Where she takes up the burden of leadership, though as more of a mentor to others. To see her progeny step forth and become great heroes.

 

[ThunderBasilisk]

Im legit positive Nana Arturia is only gonna die cause she had to much bacon.

 

[TheFabulousCustodes]

Im legit positive Nana Arturia is only gonna die cause she had to much bacon.

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She visits Vale during the Vytal Festival to cheer Jaune on, and speed run the eating contests.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Im legit positive Nana Arturia is only gonna die cause she had to much bacon.

Click to shrink...

She stays in good shape even at her age because she's just that active, even as an old lady. But yeah, Jaune definitely learned how to cook the greasiest, most delicious and fattening burgers to make his Nana happy!

Just imagine how RWBY and JNPR would react to eating them.

Yang: "Ohhh my God it's so bad and so fattening mmmmmm~..."

Weiss: "It's greasy, barbaric, and the lowest kind of fare."

Ruby: "... So... You want seconds?"

Weiss: "YES!"

Blake: "Jaune... It's so delicious... Is this fish paste?"

Jaune: "I'll admit, it's a little weird to add to a burger but I thought you might like it."

Blake: "... I do."

Ren: "... This is the most delicious burger I have ever eaten."

Nora: "Mmmmm... Oh no... Ren? Ren, I love your pancakes! I really do! I'M NOT CHEATING!"

Pyrrha: "... Jaune? I... I love you... Y-Your burgers! I love your burgers!"

Jaune: "Thanks guys, but geez. Don't make such a big deal out of it! Besides, these aren't even the best I could make them."

Blake: "... Explain."

Jaune: "I mean... If I had Radian all grass fed beef? Local cheese and vegetables? As well as fresh baked bread? Then I guarantee it would be up to my usual standards."

Silence.

Ruby: "... MINE!"

Yang: "LIKE HELL!"

Pyrrha: "HE'S MINE YOU WHORES!"

Weiss: "OVER YOUR DEAD BODIES!"

Blake: "MINE!"

Nora: "FOR THE BURGERS AND NOT SEXY TIMES!"

Ren: "SAME!"

Jaune watches his friends fight furiously in disbelief.

Jaune: "Geez... Papa Shirou was right. Cooking can be dangerous!"

 

[ThunderBasilisk]

She stays in good shape even at her age because she's just that active, even as an old lady. But yeah, Jaune definitely learned how to cook the greasiest, most delicious and fattening burgers to make his Nana happy!

Just imagine how RWBY and JNPR would react to eating them.

Yang: "Ohhh my God it's so bad and so fattening mmmmmm~..."

Weiss: "It's greasy, barbaric, and the lowest kind of fare."

Ruby: "... So... You want seconds?"

Weiss: "YES!"

Blake: "Jaune... It's so delicious... Is this fish paste?"

Jaune: "I'll admit, it's a little weird to add to a burger but I thought you might like it."

Blake: "... I do."

Ren: "... This is the most delicious burger I have ever eaten."

Nora: "Mmmmm... Oh no... Ren? Ren, I love your pancakes! I really do! I'M NOT CHEATING!"

Pyrrha: "... Jaune? I... I love you... Y-Your burgers! I love your burgers!"

Jaune: "Thanks guys, but geez. Don't make such a big deal out of it! Besides, these aren't even the best I could make them."

Blake: "... Explain."

Jaune: "I mean... If I had Radian all grass fed beef? Local cheese and vegetables? As well as fresh baked bread? Then I guarantee it would be up to my usual standards."

Silence.

Ruby: "... MINE!"

Yang: "LIKE HELL!"

Pyrrha: "HE'S MINE YOU WHORES!"

Weiss: "OVER YOUR DEAD BODIES!"

Blake: "MINE!"

Nora: "FOR THE BURGERS AND NOT SEXY TIMES!"

Ren: "SAME!"

Jaune watches his friends fight furiously in disbelief.

Jaune: "Geez... Papa Shirou was right. Cooking can be dangerous!"

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I mean its only RWBY and Pyhrra who have a stake in this. Ren and Nora can just be adopted.