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[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

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Just a place for my stray RWBY Plot bunnies and ideas to go.

- - -

"Pyrrha. We need to...
If Jaune Was Allowed to Notice Pyrrha's Issues

AndrewJTalon

Versed in the lewd.
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Just a place for my stray RWBY Plot bunnies and ideas to go.

- - -

"Pyrrha. We need to talk."

It had come out of the blue. Jaune had looked uncharacteristically serious one afternoon after classes. He had taken her aside as they stood out of the way of the other students shuffling out of the classroom.

"We do?" Pyrrha asked quietly.

Jaune nodded.

"We do. Roof. Ten minutes."

It was so surprising, and for that reason it's why Pyrrha found herself on the roof where they trained. Jaune stood there, looking a bit awkward but very serious. He crossed his arms over his chest, looking very serious. Far from the usual goofball he presented himself.

She had to admit, it was very handsome on his usually goofy, handsome face.

"What is it, Jaune?" Pyrrha asked politely.

Jaune took a deep breath and hesitated… But he pushed through that to speak seriously.

"... For days now, you've been acting like you've got the fate of the world on your shoulders. Normally, I'd let it pass... But you're my friend, Pyrrha. My partner. I can tell it's bothering you."

He looked at her gently.

"So... Are you going to tell me what it is?"

Pyrrha, remembering Ozpin's words of secrecy, tried to deflect.

"It's... just the tournament and everything involved with it, there's a lot of expectations and-"

Jaune shook his head.

"Pyrrha. I know I can be dense... But I know when you're hurting from a deadly secret. I've carried one myself. We're partners. If you're compromised in some way, it might get both of us killed. So please... Tell me."

Pyrrha was still reluctant. Again, Ozpin's words to keep this secret flashed through her mind.

She was strong. She could handle this on her own.

That is why she was chosen, wasn't it?

"I... I can't really say it. Ozpin, everyone... it's something very sensitive..."

Jaune walked up, and rested his hands on her bare shoulders. He looked her right in the eyes, and she flushed at how close he was.

"Pyrrha. This isn't some copyright dispute with your cereal company. This is life or death."

Pyrrha breathed in deeply. Her feelings warred with her duty. Having Jaune this close made the decision much harder.

Yet… What should she choose in this situation?

The man who put this weight on her shoulders… Or the man offering to share it with her? Her partner?

Pyrrha very slowly nodded.

"... Okay... but I'm only telling this because... you have a right to know. You're my teammate, my partner."

She sat down on a crate they'd dragged up to the roof as a chair. Jaune sat down with her on a matching crate. He left one hand on her shoulder, and leaned forward.

"So?" Jaune prompted.

Pyrrha looked aside, awkwardly, before she slowly looked back at him.

"Professor Ozpin is trusting me with the powers of a woman named Amber. She's dying, and the person who put her in a bad way already has half her power. They're hoping that if they can give me what power she has left, I can get the rest of it back."

Jaune blinked.

"What kind of power?" Jaune asked.

Pyrrha shook her head.

"I don't know exactly, but they're incredible. Powerful enough to kill people over. To work with Roman Torchwick and the White Fang to get at."

Jaune's jaw dropped. His eyes looked back and forth, processing this. The keen mind that vanished behind his goofy antics was hard at work behind his eyes.

"It seems like... A lot of things are happening. All these Grim attacks. These powers... White Fang..."

He shook his head.

"I don't know what it all adds up to. But... You're involved in it now. And I want to help you, however I can."

He took her hand, and squeezed it tightly.

"So... How do you feel about all this? I mean... It's obviously a lot, I uh... What I mean is, how are you handling this?"

Pyrrha smiled softly. He could still be a goober, but his was so sincere.

"Honestly? I'm scared."

Jaune stared at her, and pulled her back into a hug.

"... I'd be scared too. Hell... I'd be crying. Like a baby."

"I feel like doing that sometimes," Pyrrha admitted softly. Jaune tightened his hug, and she breathed out a soft, happy sigh.

She would have killed to have him this close before! But now… It was cast in this melancholy shadow.

"So, uh… Have you been training your new powers?" Jaune asked.

Pyrrha shook her head.

"I haven't even gotten them yet."

Jaune blinked.

"... Did Ozpin tell you what they actually are? Or how to use them?"

"No, and... there's a huge risk in even transferring the powers."

Jaune's eyes narrowed.

"What kind of risk?"

"... That I might lose myself," Pyrrha admitted, with some difficulty, "That I might stop being Pyrrha. I-I might just… Become someone else."

Jaune stood up, furious. Pyrrha leaned back in shock as he got up and swore.

"What the fuck... What the hell is he playing at?!"

He stomped around angrily.

"Who does he think he is, some wizard in a children's book?! This is life or death and he's-What, playing fucking games?!"

Honestly, she'd never seen him so furious before... On her behalf! Her heart fluttered.

"J-Jaune..."

He turned back to her, and took her hand. She rose up back onto her feet as he held her palms between his. He was so… Empathic. It made her head feel light, how intense he was!

"Damnit... Pyrrha? Tomorrow we are going right to Ozpin, and we're getting some damn answers! Nora and Ren too! You shouldn't have to carry this burden all on your own, without knowing all the details! We're a team! And we support eachother!"

Pyrrha smiled warmly, fighting back some tears. She'd felt so alone, so worried, and yet… Her partner was there for her. Like he always had been.

"Thank you. Thank you so much Jaune."

Jaune was angrily muttering, distracted.

"Goddamnit he's so... Urgh... I'd... If he doesn't tell us all the details, I'm gonna sic Nora on him! I'll tell her he's gonna ban pancakes from the school! I'll let her break his LEGS! Erasing you, what does he think he's doing putting this all on you?! I'll!"

She hugged him tightly.

"Thank you," she said, much more firmly. She smiled lovingly into his eyes. He stuttered, and then flushed.
"I... Oh… Well... You're my partner, Pyrrha. I'd do anything for you. Because you'd do anything for me."

He was so close to her... He was warm... And well... Given her emotional state… She pressed forward with pursed lips.

They met together. With the setting sun, the stars peeking out of the twilight overhead, the silence, and the warmth of his skin and body… It was magical.

Everything was perfect… Then Jaune jerked back with a start.

"Ah... Sorry-!"

"N-No, no, I'm sorry," Pyrrha said quickly, shaking her head. "I-I just couldn't-!"

"It was my bad and I'm… I didn't mean to-"

"I wanted it!"

Jaune stared at her. She had never felt more terrified in her life than at this moment. She felt like she was holding onto him for dear life.

"I wanted it," she repeated firmly.

Jaune stared at her in silence for a long time. He blinked. He blinked again.

"Pyrrha, I…"

He coughed.

"Do… Do you want to kiss some more?"

Pyrrha laughed.

"Y-Yes! YES!"

He pressed his lips to hers, and everything was perfect again.

- - -

Feel free to post your own, as I've got a lot more coming.
 
Blake Didn't Notice
I also had an evil idea for a short: Blake and Yang take down Adam, Blake tries to confess to Yang... But...

Yang: "Oh, sorry. I'm with Jaune."

They share a messy kiss as Blake gapes.

Blake: "Wh-What?! YANG!"

Yang: cuddling with Jaune "Mm?"

Blake: "Wha-How could you be dating Jaune?!"

Yang: "Well, he was there for me when I lost my arm. We stayed in contact. We bonded over our trauma... I mean, I did have to jump him to make it clear I wanted him but..." Silly perverted grin "No complaints there. He always knows how to ARC my back~."

Jaune: blush "Yang..."

Yang: "What? I always wanted a little Jaune in me. Or not so little."

Jaune: blush "Yang...!"

Sun also shows up. Blake is like "Oh hey, he's simping for me, we can get back together!" And he just says hi to Blake before he kisses Weiss.

Blake: "Wait what?!"

Sun: "Oh, hey Blake!"

Blake: "Wha-How do you know each other?!"

Sun: "We've been texting and emailing each other since Beacon."

Blake: "Huh?! But you were-You were all about me!"

Sun: "I helped you out, but you just wanted to be friends. Weiss didn't want to be."

Weiss: "He's a good man, he's hot, and he pisses off my dad!" Smirk as she snuggles with Sun

Qrow appears, and hands a baby over to Yang and Jaune.


Qrow: "Picked him up from the babysitters."

Yang: "Thanks Uncle Qrow!"

Jaune: "Thank you so much!"

Blake: "WHA-YOU HAVE A BABY?!"

Jaune: "Uh yeah."

Yang: "We're also married."

Blake: "MARRIED?!"

Jaune: "We sent you a text but you never answered."

Ruby: "Awww... Hey baby Nick! Auntie Ruby is here!"

The baby giggles.

Blake: "I... Did I seriously not notice?! How?!"

Weiss: evil smile "You do tend to be utterly oblivious to anything that doesn't directly involve you, after all."

Blake: "No I'm not!"

- - -

I mean, it can't go past a short because any more would come off as bashing, but it would be funny to just play up Canon!Blake's self-absorption until it's completely ridiculous.
 
Whitley and Ruby: A Whiter Rose
Let's say Whitley, being a bit precocious, decides to go visit Weiss at Beacon because he's rich and even if he's his father's son, he might still get a kick out of bothering his big sister.

When he gets there though...

- - -


Honestly, he still couldn't see why Weiss had come here. Sure, it was warmer, but that just meant the people were softer, weaker. Weiss looked softer, less hardened. No wonder Father was considering making him the heir. He bet she'd run off like Winter, and then...

"And then we have..." Weiss trailed off and winced. "Oh no."

"Whatever is troubling you, Sister?" Whitley asked dryly. He looked in the same direction and...

His heart stopped in his chest. His cheeks went bright red.

A vision of loveliness raced towards them, with black hair with red tips, a wide smile across her gorgeous face, and silver eyes that wanted to swallow him up completely.

"Heeeyyyy Weissss!" The beauty called, waving her hand as a red cloak spread behind her like angel wings. It may have been the angle of the sunlight, or the brightness of her smile, but... Whitley was rendered absolutely speechless.

The goddess slid to a halt in front of them, smiling widely.

"Who's your buddy?"

"This is my little brother," Weiss managed in a growl. "Whitley, this is Ruby Rose, my team leader. Ruby, my little brother Whitley. He's visiting me from home."

Ruby... Like the gemstone...

Ruby beamed.

"Hey! Nice to meet you!"

He tried to open his mouth. Nothing came out. His hand went up shakily, to try and give her a handshake as was proper... And then she sprang forward and hugged him.

"RUBY!" Weiss shrieked.

"What? We're best friends, I wanna be best friends with your little brother!" Ruby said. She smiled at him warmly. "Is it okay if I hug you? You look like you'd really like them!"

She blinked and paled.

"Oh, geez... Or do I work up to hugs?! I'm sorry, I've gotten so used to hugging-I-I'm sorry!"

Her scent, her warmth, seeing how beautiful she was up close... It all overwhelmed Whitley. He tried to open his mouth to speak, but again, nothing came out!

COME ON! SAY SOMETHING! ANYTHING! His brain screamed.

What dark power did this-this temptress possess?!

Weiss hauled Ruby back, and automatically began to fix his tie and straight his vest.

"Seriously Ruby? Can you please not act like such a dolt? He's not used to... Well... You," Weiss hissed.

Whitley could not have hated his big sister more than in that moment.

Ruby flushed, and looked down. Her downcast face made him feel like the lowest scum on Earth-What was she doing to him?!

"I uh..." He managed to get his mouth working again, "That... It's... It's okay..."

She brightened, smiling like the sun. His heart thumped in his chest like a machine gun.

Why... Why does it look like she's shining?! He thought.

"So uh... You like Dust, right?" Ruby asked.

Weiss rolled her eyes.

"YES Ruby, he likes Dust. He's being trained to take over parts of the SDC when he's of age, he does know a lot about Dust!"

"Y-YES!" Whitley said, his voice cracking, "I-I know plenty about Dust! I-I love learning about it! The Fousillier-Ingram Process is a hobby of mine!"

Weiss stared at him in bewildered horror. Whitley could not dispute the feeling. What kind of idiot just babbled about an obscure Dust production process to a beautiful woman?! She must think him a bore! Or an imbecile! Or a common laborer! Or a-!

Ruby's eyes shined.

"Really?! That process is so new! I read all about it in Dust to Dust magazine but I don't have anyone to talk about it! It's so fascinating, especially when it relates to cartridge expansion rates!"

... She... She liked Dust?! She knew all about it?! She understood it scientifically?!

Whitley was reminded of a bunch of empty headed socialites back home who babbled about social matters and politics and Gods knew what else! All boring, empty twaddle! He hated those parties, hated having to put up with all that nonsense!

"I... I would love to," Whitley managed, his face dreamy. Ruby beamed, and took his hand.

"Come on! Let's go to the library! Or maybe the range? Ooh! Library, then range!"

She was holding his hand...!

This girl... Was gorgeous, training to be a Huntress, a team leader, and liked Dust and guns?!

She's... The perfect woman,
Whitley thought happily. Utterly unaware of the faintly horrified and nauseated look Weiss was wearing as she watched them run off.

- - -

Basically, Whitley falls HARD for Ruby. Crushes on her instantly. Ruby doesn't QUITE get it, but he is pretty nice, albeit snooty. But Weiss is snooty and Ruby likes her too.

Weiss of course realizes that if Whitley falls for Ruby, she'll be RELATED to the dolt! So Weiss must do everything in her power to prevent them from becoming a true item!
 
Yang and Jaune: Dragonslayer Drama Concept
Some Dragonslayer drama I cooked up years ago. Here's a second or third draft of the original concept.

- - -

The fall of Beacon had been devastating. For Ruby, for… For everyone. From the moment she had woken up on Patch, she had wanted to go back to Vale and continue the fight. Jaune, who had shown up with Nora and Ren, had agreed with her.

The Grimm Dragon she had frozen in stone with her eyes was still alive and still producing Grimm, and everyone had wanted to take it out. For Pyrrha, if nothing else.

Taiyang had vetoed this: Now that the Grimm Dragon was helpless, it would just require gathering forces to kill it while it was frozen. Atlas was seeing to that according to the news.

So, Haven and tracking down Cinder became their new priority. But they needed to train.

They'd gotten beaten, and badly. They had to get into some kind of shape before they headed out.

So, Jaune had them run drills and formations, from sunup to sun down. And at first, Ruby had been very glad.

Jaune had come onto the island, all business, barely a trace of goofiness. He'd organized training schedules, and pushed them and himself as hard as possible. Say what you would about him, he always came up with something. From working with General Ironwood to get some intel on Cinder and her gang, to potential counters to the fiery bitch when they ran into her again.

But frankly, his intensity was starting to worry her

Ruby was taking a break in the shade near her family cabin, Ren sitting with her on a log. She was sipping a disgusting health smoothie he had whipped up for them. It was nasty but she had to admit, she felt a lot better drinking it than just plain tap water.

Out in the field, while her dad monitored things, Jaune and Nora sparred. Jaune couldn't tank Nora's hits, so he relied on his footwork to dodge her blows. She slammed her hammer down into the ground, and he narrowly dodged out of the way of the earth shaking blow.

He lunged forward with his blade, but Nora twisted out of the way and swung her feet into his shield. Jaune took the blow, but managed to twist his hips to with the momentum, trying to strike again. Nora managed to deflect the sword blow with her gauntlet, and threw her head forward to head butt him.

"UGH!"

Jaune staggered back, as Nora yanked Magnhild out of the grass and swung again. Jaune got his shield up in time, danced back to take the momentum of the swing… And still ended up flying off his feet into a tree.

"GAH!"

And through it. He collapsed onto his hands and knees, as the tree fell over.

"G-Good… Hit," Jaune managed.

"New personal best, Nora," Taiyang observed, as he walked over to Jaune. He pulled the blond young man up to his feet.

"I don't feel good about it," Nora winced. "Jaune-Jaune, you okay?"

"I'm fine," Jaune managed, a bit unsteady on his feet but still on them. He held up his shield and sword. "Let's go again-"

"No," Taiyang stated firmly. Jaune sighed, as Ruby winced.

"Haa... Haaa... All right. Well... On the plus side, Mister Xiao Long, we have firewood."

Normally, Ruby would have groaned at the bad pun. Jaune's exhaustion and hollow eyes made any enjoyment out of the bad joke vanish.

"And you should take a break," Taiyang stated authoritatively, "All of you." He looked at Jaune.

"Nora, get him back in the house, I'm going to collect firewood."

Nora saluted him, and went to Jaune's side. He struggled, but Nora pulled his shield arm over her shoulders.

"Righty-o!"

"We'll go too, Dad," Ruby said. Ren nodded, and rose. He went to Jaune's side, and Ruby walked behind him. She put a hand on his shoulder.

"We're doing okay, Jaune," Ruby said.

Jaune took a deep breath.

"Y-Yeah… We're better," he muttered, "But not good enough."

They entered the log cabin. Ren went to the living room to meditate, and Nora went with him to sit with him. Ruby helped Jaune into the kitchen, sitting him down in a stool at the kitchen island. She went to the fridge for food and drinks. She pulled back… And started.

There was a rare sight in the kitchen. Her blonde older half-sister, Yang. She had her hair up in a messy ponytail, she wore a black T-shirt with her empty right sleeve tied up, and short-shorts. She had wandered in, and rummaged around in the pantry.

"Come on, come on…"

She found peanut butter, jelly, and bread and tossed it onto the kitchen island in a heap. She pulled out a knife from a drawer, and set it down on the table. She reached for the peanut butter jar, and tried to twist off the top.

"I'll get the water, Ren~!" Nora sang as she skipped into the kitchen. She beamed.

"Hey Yang!"

"Hey Nora," Yang muttered back.

She was trying not to look frustrated by her inability to get the lid off the jar, as she curled her entire arm around it and tried to use the ends of her fingers to loosen the lid.

Jaune watched her grunt for a bit, before he reached out and took hold of the jar.

"There. Do it now," he stated.

Ruby and Nora both sucked in nervous breaths.

Yang stared at him for a moment, before she sighed and unscrewed the lid.

"... Thanks," she muttered, her tone dripping with something unpleasant.

"You're welcome," Jaune replied, not much better as he glared.

Yang grabbed the knife and began working on trying to spread the jelly on her bread… And she began to have trouble with that. She grunted angrily under her breath.

Jaune watched this go on for a bit, before he let out a breath of exasperation.

"Here. I'll do it." He reached out to take the knife, but she yanked it back with a glare.

"No!"

She glared at him. Jaune glared back.

"I want peanut butter and jelly too, it'll go faster-"

"Then you may as well cut the crusts off if you're going to treat me like a damn baby." Angrily, she stormed out of the kitchen upstairs.

"I was trying to help!" Jaune shouted after her, punctuated by the slam of a door. He sat down angrily, and began making his own sandwiches.

Nora, silent to this point, hummed.

"Seems like she doesn't want help, huh?"

"She's still dealing," Ruby pointed out, "It hasn't been easy for her-"

"It's stupid."

Nora and Ruby both looked over at Jaune, who was now angrily eating his sandwiches.

"She won't ask for help out of pride! Stubborn freaking...!"

"Jaune, please," Ruby tried, but Jaune silenced her with a glare.

"No Ruby! I… I know she's your sister, but she's been acting like this since we got here!" He growled as he downed some milk.

"She… She hates feeling weak, helpless," Ruby went on quietly, "I-I can relate."

Jaune shook his head.

"I can relate. Last place, remember? But I didn't take it out on other people!"

"She just…! She's got a lot more than feeling weak on her head," Ruby still pushed. "Losing… Losing her arm. Losing… Losing Blake."

Jaune started and looked at Ruby.

"Is she-?!"

"No, no!" Ruby said quickly, sighing in relief, "But… She wasn't happy to hear it from Sun that she was still alive. That… That she ran off on us. That she… Abandoned us."

Nora hugged Ruby tightly. The shorter, slimmer redhead accepted it, but carefully pushed her away after a bit. She shook her head.

"It's okay… It's just… It's a lot to lose," Ruby managed.

"Yeah well... Some people lost a lot more."

Ruby and Nora both looked over at Jaune. He was finishing his sandwich with a bitter, sad look on his face. Ruby trembled, and reached out to take his hand. He looked up, into her sorrow filled face.

"Please, don't," she whispered.

Jaune stared at her. He bowed his head.

"I'm sorry," he murmured. Ruby tried to move to hug him, but he held up a hand.

"I… I'm fine," he muttered.

She knew he was lying, but she nodded slowly.

Nora smiled sadly.

"... If we're going to start blaming people, maybe we should blame the people who did the bad things? And not us? Just a thought."

She twirled off to go bug Ren. The two team leaders looked at each other.

"... I hate it when she's right," Jaune grunted. Ruby managed a small smile.

"I'm glad she's here. "I'm glad you and Ren are, too."

Jaune smiled. Something that had become increasingly rare around here.

"Yeah. Me too," he said.

Ruby perked up.

"I'll go talk to Yang, 'kay?"

Jaune nodded. Ruby ran up the stairs, but paused when he cleared his throat.

"Hey, um... Tell her I'm sorry if I upset her."

"Roger dodger!"

Ruby made it to Yang's door, and slowly opened it. Inside, Yang was curled up on her bed with the lights off. She was staring at the far wall, her back to the door.

"Yang?" Ruby asked quietly.

"Go 'way."

Ruby sucked in a shallow breath.

"Jaune wanted to say he's sorry."

"Whatever, I don't care."

Ruby winced.

"He-He only wanted to help-"

Then cut my other arm off, so he'll have an excuse," Yang shot back. Ruby's eyes widened.

"Yang! How could you-?!"

Yang looked back over her shoulder, and glared at her little sister.

"Shut the fuck up, and leave me alone."

Ruby's lip wobbled. She fought back the tears. She nodded, and turned, closing the door behind her. She slowly walked back down the stairs. Jaune was waiting down there for her, and saw her state.

"Ruby?" He asked, moving closer to her.

"She's... she forgives you," Ruby managed in a whisper. Jaune stepped up in front of her, and wrapped his arms around her.

"You're not a good liar, Ruby... If I can tell."

Ruby sniffled, pressing her face into his chest.

"She's being a butt. But she's so torn up and sad inside..."

She looked up into his face.

"Like you are."

Jaune was silent for a moment before he nodded.

"Like we all are," he murmured. He hugged her, and she sank into the comforting warmth.

"Difference is," he muttered, "I'm not being an asshole to all of you, am I?"

"No... Just to yourself," Ruby mumbled.

Jaune tightened the hug but didn't say anything.

She sucked in another breath and looked back up.

"She just needs someone to comfort her," Ruby said quietly, "Someone… Someone going through the same things."

Jaune was silent, his face grim.

"And you're not… I…" Ruby bowed her head.

"I-I can't do it, Jaune," Ruby whimpered, "I… I'm sorry! I-I just… I can't and I…!"

She pulled herself together.

"Please… She… She just needs someone to comfort her," she murmured, "Someone who can… Who can handle it. Because I… I can't, Jaune. I'm so sorry, I just-!"

Jaune hugged her, and kissed the top of her head.

"Okay," he murmured.

Ruby bit back a sob. She hated having to do this, hated having to rely on him again. Since he'd gotten her he had done nothing but push, nothing but take on burdens. Burdens she should have taken on as a team leader… But she didn't have a team anymore. And she didn't know what to do.

"Jaune… I-I don't deserve you," she sniffled. Jaune rubbed her hair gently.

"We're friends. It's what they do," he murmured. "I… I don't know how much good I can do, but I'll do it. Even if it means being someone's punching bag… I've got enough practice."

Ruby hugged him more tightly.

"She won't hit you, but she's going to be cranky," she murmured, "And-And mean…"

"I'll take it," Jaune said softly.

He let her go, and Ruby already missed the feeling of his hug. He sighed and headed up. When he reached the landing of the stairs, Ruby spoke again.

"Jaune, wait."

He stopped and looked back down at Ruby. She gave him a plaintive look.

"Whatever she's up for doing? Could you do it? If it's talking, or training, or... whatever it is she wants to do... be on board? Please?"

Jaune slowly nodded.

"I will. I promise."

- - -

Jaune walked up to Yang's room. He took hold of the handle, turned it, and entered. It was decorated much as he expected Yang's room to be: Posters of bands and nightclubs on the walls, clutter everywhere, a punching bag in the corner with some hand weights and Ember Celica lying on a table.

Her new prosthetic arm also lay on the table, untouched.

"Yang?"

Yang was curled up in her bed. She turned back and glared blearily at him.

"Did you cut the crusts off?" She snarked.

"No," he stated flatly. "Look. I..." He grimaced, and sat down on her bed. She kept up her glare.

"You made Ruby cry, Yang," he stated, "Okay? That's not cool."

Yang snorted.

"I don't care," she muttered, turning away.

"I know you care about it," Jaune insisted, "Otherwise you wouldn't be feeling like shit about it. I can tell."

"I don't care, just leave me alone."

"Ruby made me promise to help you," Jaune stated firmly, "So guess what? Until I do, I'm not going anywhere."

Yang glared at him fiercely, sitting up just a bit. She rested on her remaining arm as she did.
"Oh really? How are you going to do that?" Yang shot back nastily.

Jaune shrugged.

"Maybe trying to talk? Look, I…"

He sucked in a breath. Godsdamnit, why did he try? He was the worst at this…

Because Ruby asked me to, his mind supplied.

"I get it," he stated. "All right? I get it."

"No you don't," Yang growled, "You don't get it at all-!"

"I do," Jaune said firmly, glaring into her eyes, "And you don't get to tell me I don't."

Yang seethed.

"Who do you think you are? ''Oh Yang, don't feel so bad, when the girl who loved me left me, she died!' I'm supposed to not feel so bad because you had it worse-?!"

Jaune shot her the angriest, deadliest look she had ever seen on his face. She started at the raw, naked rage and pain burning in his eyes. She scooted back in shock, and even some fear.

"Don't," Jaune managed in a tightly controlled snarl, "You want to hurt everyone just because you can't handle things? Fine. But don't. Bring. Her. Up."

Yang blinked a few times, and she bowed her head. Raw shame filled her.

"... I-I'm sorry," she murmured. "I… That was a bitch move. I-I'm sorry…"

The room was silent except for the sounds of their breathing. Jaune's breathing slowly returned to normal.

"... You should leave," she murmured.

"I promised I wouldn't-"

"I almost said… I almost said something we'd both regret," she choked out. She blinked back her tears.

"And I'm not… I'm not even mad at you."

"Who then?" Jaune asked.

"Myself… Life… I don't fucking know," Yang growled.

"We all are, Yang," Jaune insisted. Yang looked up and glared, her eyes briefly flashing red.

"You don't… You didn't fail like I did! I rushed in, I threw everything I had into it, and I…!" She bit back a sob, and clutched at the stump that was her right arm. "When I came to, Blake was gone, Weiss got kidnapped, Beacon and Vale are in ruins…!"

"That's not your fault!" Jaune stated, "It isn't-!"

"Then why does it fucking feel like it, huh?!" Yang snarled. "There are so many things I could have, should have done differently, damnit! I put in so much effort, I gave up everything but my life and it wasn't enough!"

She pounded her remaining fist on the mattress, making it creak and squeak loudly. She breathed hard, tears slipping down her cheeks as she glared at her knees.

"And she left me… She ran out on me… How the fuck am I supposed to deal with it, huh?" She glared at him. "Just shove it away and ignore it, like you?! Is that working out well for you?! Why do you even care?! You don't have to come here! You don't even have to be in this room talking to me! Why are you trying to help?! I didn't ask for it!"

Jaune closed his eyes. Again, she felt like the worst bitch in the world. She made to apologize, to try and head off his anger… Or hell, maybe she should let him take a swing at her.

She'd more than earned it.

Instead, Jaune slumped down. He looked… So godsdamned tired, like all his energy had vanished into the aether and what was left was a man staring in the abyss.

"... I'm trying to do something about it," Jaune said quietly, "Because… There is no one else to do it."

Yang stared.

"Jaune?"

"Nora and Ren needed leadership… Ruby needed a friend… They needed a plan," he muttered. "They needed to know someone was there for them. Someone knew what to do. Weiss was gone. Blake too. Your dad's trying but… He's got his own things. Your Uncle Qrow is running around, you barely see him… And you…"

He looked into Yang's eyes.

"I had to step up, because there was no one else," he stated softly. "All I can do is help her. Help them… Help you. Because someone has to. There's no one else."

Yang recalled these same words. Her thoughts when she had to step up after Summer died. How she had to take care of things when Dad was a broken man and Qrow was nowhere to be found.

There's no one else…

Jaune gritted his teeth.

"And if I suck at it, I'm sorry. I'm trying my best, Yang. I'm trying as hard as I can. All right? But then you get on your damn high horse, oh, I'm in sooo much fucking pain! I lost an arm! My partner ran off! You know what I lost?!"

Jaune took a deep angry breath.

"Pyrrha… She wouldn't let me fight with her. She kissed me, she told me she loved me, and then she shoved me into a fucking locker. I couldn't do a damn thing!"

He clenched his fists and glared down at them.

"And the worst part?! The worst part is that I know… I know… I would have just gotten in the damn way if I'd stayed," he growled, "I'd have been less than useless. I know all that… But I still would have stayed. Because if it came down to it? Her life was worth more than mine."

"Jaune, no," Yang tried, but Jaune shook his head.

"I could have at least been a fucking distraction! I could have let her win! If it took my life instead of hers?! Then that would have been worth it! As long as she… As long as everyone else was okay? I'd have been fine with dying! I know what I'm worth!"

He glared right at her.

"So yes Yang, I'm going to sit here, and I'm gonna try to help, because that's what's needed. I failed to be what Pyrrha needed. She died because of it. So I'm going to be what you, and Ruby, and anyone else needs! Okay?!"

Yang stared at him for a long, tense moment. He just kept breathing harshly. He closed his eyes and tried to calm himself. It was then her anger rose, and her eyes burned red.

She punched him. She couldn't use a lot of her strength since she was sitting down, but his head rocked back. He looked at her in shock and anger.

"You're such a fucking idiot," Yang snarled, "You really-You really think she'd have been happy with you dying?! You think any of us would have been happy if you sacrificed yourself instead of her?! How do you think Ruby would feel if she lost you, huh?!"

"I-I just-!"

"You don't get to pull that shit!" Yang snarled. "Ruby would be broken and lost without you! So would Nora and Ren! I-How would Pyrrha feel, huh?! You thinking that you should have died when she gave everything just so you would live?! You shitbag!"

They panted hard, their faces close together as they shouted at each other. Jaune swallowed, glaring into Yang's eyes.

"And Ruby's lost without you!" He shot back. "So you don't get to pull that shit with me, either! She needs her sister! She needs her team! I don't care if you think you're a jinx or cursed or whatever! She needs you, godsdamnit! We all do! Just because Blake ran off like that cunt of a mother of yours did and you lost your arm doesn't give you a fucking excuse!"

Yang's face went pale. Jaune panted hard, glaring angrily. He expected more abuse, more anger, even another punch…

He didn't expect tears to fall from her eyes and her to bow her head in defeat.

"Shit… Shit, Yang, I-I'm sorry-"

"You're so fucking blunt, you fucking stupid bastard!" Yang sobbed. Without anything else he could think of, he pulled her into a hug. She squirmed a bit, but he tightened his grip to keep her tight against him.

It was funny. Yang was always so tall, so loud, so strong and in charge. It was easy to forget how small she was, compared to him. Her face buried in his chest as she sobbed hard and ugly. He held her, and rubbed the small of her back as he had done to comfort his younger sisters in the past.

She cried, and cried, and Jaune couldn't say he didn't cry a little too. But he hid it, and held her, and let her get it all out.

Because he promised Ruby he would.

"You stupid… Fuck…" She muttered, still crying.

"I know… I know," Jaune mumbled back. He sighed softly, smelling her hair. Even in its frazzled state, it still smelled good.

He laid down on the bed with her, just holding her tightly as she continued to cry softly. He continued to stroke her back, and muttered anything soothing he could think of.

After a while, her breathing slowed, and she fell asleep. Jaune was pretty tired himself. He began to move to pull away… But her arm stayed wrapped around his waist.

"No… Don't go," she mumbled, "Please…"

Jaune slid back down and tightened his grip on her. He sighed and looked around the room. His eyes froze when he saw the door was partially open, and who was standing there watching.

Oh shit, Taiyang…

He opened his mouth to say something, anything, but Yang's father just smiled and shook his head. He held up a finger to his lips, before he shut the door.

Jaune held in a sigh. He kicked off his shoes, pulled off his armor and belt, and pulled the covers up over both Yang and himself. She snuggled in closer. He nuzzled the top of her head, and closed his eyes.

- - -
 
Isabel Wants Grandbabies!
Now, I don't mind Jaune Harems. I like them when they're well done, but I don't take them too seriously. This idea is that rather than Jaune starting it up... His mother, after learning he's at Beacon, storms in and makes things clear:

If he's going to be a Huntsman, he had BETTER give her GRANDBABIES!

And so she decides to "help" him...

- - -

Isabel: "Glynda! You're going to turn into a spinster!"

Glynda: "I'm only thirty-!"

Isabel: "YOUR EGGS ARE DRYING UP! HERE! MY SON IS VIRILE ENOUGH TO KNOCK YOU UP UNTIL YOU'RE FIFTY!"

Glynda: "But-But he's my student-!"

Isabel: "That's spinster talk! GIVE ME SOME GRANDKIDS!"

- - -

Weiss: "Ah, Mrs. Arc, I don't really-?"

Isabel: "Listen, I understand my boy didn't do a good job of courting you. I'm so sorry. But look!" Hands her photos and video "Take another look, hm? Now that you're at least friends?"

Weiss: looks at the images and video of Jaune shirtless and doing farm chores... Blushes "O-Oh... My... He's so... Filthy!"

Isabel: "Yes. He knows how to do a man's work! Get his hands dirty and rough, work up a sweat, and survive in the wild! Better than any prissy Atlasian noble your father's tried to force upon you, right?"

Weiss: "I-I well, um, I-I mean-!"

Isabel: "How about you hold onto these... And think it over, hmmm?"

Weiss: bright red "I-I just, I mean, oh...!"

- - -

Pyrrha: "Mrs. Arc, I... I'm so glad to meet you. Your son is my partner, my friend, he's such a wonderful person-!"

Isabel: "And you're in love with him but he can't tell and you can't say it, right?"

Pyrrha: "..." Bright red

isabel: laughs "Oh it's all right, sweetie! I was the same way with Jaune's father! He was so dense and I was so shy, it was ridiculous! But you know, there is a way to get past his obliviousness and your own fears."

Pyrrha: "Wh-What?"

Isabel: "Are you sure? You don't seem very strong willed-"

Pyrrha: leans forward, eyes wide "Mrs. Arc. I swear... I want him. I WANT TO HAVE TWELVE CHILDREN WITH HIM."

Isabel: "WONDERFUL! That's the proper attitude, young lady! It's very simple: Be absolutely direct. Sit him down and make it clear you love him and want to have his children."

Pyrrha: "That... That worked?!"

Isabel: "Of course it worked! ... Though some bondage did help."

Pyrrha: pulls out her notepad and a pencil "Tell me more, Mother-in-Law!"

Isabel: "Certainly my dear!"

- - -

Yang: "So, you're Vomit Boy's mom?"

Isabel: "Aw, you have pet names already? Wonderful!"

Yang: "Er, no, I mean, we're-we're just friends! Sort of-"

Isabel: "Yang Xiaolong, my dear. I was once in your position, long ago. A mere Double-Dee cup."

Yang: "Eh?!"

Isabel: "Just coasting through life having freedom and adventures and bar fights... But then I realized that what I really wanted? Was a family. My parents both died when I was young, I had to fend for myself. I was all alone... And then I met Nick. Here was a man who would never, ever abandon me. Who would love me and give me a home, and family. I mean, I still enjoy a proper bar brawl, but it's far better with a home of love and family to come back to. It really is."

Yang: sniffle "... H-How do you...?"

Isabel: "Raven Branwen is just that big of a cunt, Yang. She is the universal example of the worst mother in Remnant. It's okay." hugs her "It's all right... I'm here for you."

Yang: "Holy... Shit... What's happening...?" cries as Isabel comforts her

After a good cry and a pep talk...

Yang: "Thank you... I-I just... I could never put all that into words with anyone..."

Isabel: "It's all right, dear, it's all right... But of course, this is why I must forbid you from dating my son."

Yang: "Wait what?!"

Isabel: nods gravely "Yes, even though I think you two would be perfect together, there's no way a rebellious girl like you would ever be tempted to settle down with him, or share your life with him, or have nine children with him. Sorry, but I must forbid it. You're just not the sort of girl who would be interested in that kind of thing with him."

Yang: "I ABSOLUTELY WOULD BE! I-I'D BE THE BEST WIFE AND MOM EVER! AND I'D HAVE PLENTY OF KIDS WITH HIM!"

Isabel: "Pyrrha says she wants twelve kids with him."

Yang: "WHAT?! THAT SKANK-I'LL HAVE FOURTEEN WITH HIM!"

Isabel: "I'll believe it when I see it!"

Yang: "YOU'RE ON, YOU OLD HAG! YOUR SON IS GONNA BE CALLING ME MOMMY!"

Isabel: smirks on the inside "Sure you will~!" Kukuku... Just as planned!

- - -


Blake was reading in the library, trying to escape how weird everything had gotten...

Isabel: "Hello Blake!"

Blake: "Oh. Hello Mrs. Arc."

Isabel just sits there. Blake frowns but goes back to her book. Isabel keeps sitting there.

This persists for about two minutes before Blake sighs.


Blake: "... Can I help you with something?"

Isabel: "I just wanted to visit with you, since I'm getting to know all of my Jaune's friends."

Blake: "We're... I mean... We're sort of friends? But we don't really talk."

Isabel: "Ah. That's unfortunate."

Blake: "I'm not really in the mood to date, what with my ex being... Uh..."

Isabel: "A murderous psychopath?"

Blake: blinks "How does everyone keep finding out about that?"

Isabel: "Blake, dear, you didn't even change your name when you joined the school."

Blake: "Oh... Right..."

Isabel: "Hmmm..." Peers over to see the book Blake is really reading behind her book "Oh! I recognize that! Ninjas of Love, right?"

Blake: "I uh... Well, yes. I happen to like it-"

Isabel: "Oh good! So do I! My eldest daughter wrote it!"

Blake: jaw drops "What?!"

Isabel: "Saphron Terra-Cotta? That's my girl! She did need some references for some of the artwork and dialogue, so she used Jaune! Poor boy, having to go around in ninja gear..."

Blake: "W-Wait... Which character?"

Isabel: "Oh, um... Hmmm... Sora, I think?"

Blake: turns bright red

Isabel: "Dear, are you all right?"

Blake: The character I've written the most smut for...? Oh no...

Blake: "F-Fine!"

Isabel: "Well, I don't want to make it seem like I'm pressuring every girl to give me grandbabies, mind you. That would be ridiculous! I suppose that's the Faunus in me."

Blake: "Faunus?!"

She sniffs... Yes... Isabel has a trace of Faunus in her scent.

Isabel: "Oh, yes. We're distantly related to Lowe Aslan, the Lion Lord of the Faunus? It's not a big deal, really. His kingdom is long gone, after all, but it's a nice mark of pride for us. No pun intended."

Blake: slightly faint "Y-You... You mean you're descended... From Lowe Aslan, the Golden Lion Lord? The Breaker of Chains!? The one who started the Faunus Revolution?!"

Isabel: "Yes! We are very proud to have such a lineage. It's regrettable how things have gone between Faunus and humans in recent years, don't you think? It would be nice to make progress towards a more equal future again."

Blake: bright red "... Y-Yes, that would be good..."

Isabel: "But as I was saying, there's no need for me to push you at my Jaune. It would be completely unnatural and unfair."

Blake: "Y-Yes... Yes, very unfair..."

Isabel: beams "But you know, one whiff of a fertile girl and I can't help thinking about grandchildren. Sorry about that."

Blake: "D-Don't apologize for your Faunus roots! That's totally fine! Absolutely fine... Just out of curiosity, where is your son now?"

Isabel: "He's in training at the gym."

Blake: "Excuse me." She hurries off

Isabel: Waits... Then dials a number on her scroll "Kali?"

Kali: "Yes Isabel?'

Isabel: "Operation Grandkitties is go!"

Kali: "HUZZAH!"

- - -

How would Isabel try to convince other girls at Beacon? And naturally because she's kind of nuts, she'll just keep on going and going and GOING...
 
A Whiter Rose: First Attempt
On the subject of Whitley trying to court Ruby... He would probably have no idea how to go about it. And he's sure as hell not asking his DAD.

But since he is a Schnee, he will try to do things himself... And probably based upon romance comics and novels.

Ruby: "Hey Whitley!" Bounces up to him happily "How are you today?"

Whitley: "My soul is aflame with ardor for you, Ruby Rose!" poses dramatically

Ruby: "... Does that hurt?"

Whitley: "Uh... Kind of... I uh... My loins burn for you!"

Ruby: "Oh my gosh! Let's get you to the nurse's office! They must have a cream for that, Yang had a bad rash-"

Whitley: "N-No! No! It's uh... It's not that bad... Ummm... You are my sun!"

Ruby: "... Did I cause your burns?"

Whitley: "NO!"

Ruby: "Why are you upset, I'm trying to help!"

Whitley: "I... I'm sorry... Can we... Go play video games and work on guns?"

Ruby: "Errr... Sure? I was going to ask you to do that anyway?"

Whitley: "Oh... R-Right... Ahahaha... That's... Yeah..."

He tosses the romance book in the trash when Ruby isn't looking.
 
Knightshade Wacky Scheme
More ideas:

-Blake's parents come to visit Beacon before the fall as part of a diplomatic visit. In an effort to keep them off her back and think she's happy, she asks Jaune to be her fake boyfriend. Hilarity ensues.

Jaune: "Okay... So you want me to be your pretend boyfriend? Why?"

Blake: "If I'm dating a human then it will look like I'm really past Adam and the White Fang."

Jaune: "And why me?"

Blake: "Ren would be my preference-"

Jaune: "Gee, thanks-"

Blake: "But Nora would kill me."

Jaune: "Right, nobody would want to fight you for me, of course."

Somewhere else, Pyrrha sneezes.

Blake: "I didn't mean it like that! I... I trust you!"

Jaune: "Wait really?"

Blake: "Yes. If Yang trusts you to be friends with Ruby, of course you're trustworthy. And you don't mind Faunus, right?"

Jaune: "No, of course not!"

Blake: "And you don't have a Faunus fetish, right?"

Jaune: "Uh... I mean, no more than any other guy?"

Blake: sigh "... I suppose that might help."

Jaune: "I just, why do we have to do a wacky scheme like this-?"

Blake: "This is not a whacky scheme! This is a strategic psyop mission to deceive my parents into thinking I am doing well and allowing them to not worry over me! They will thus govern Menagerie more effectively without worrying over me! You pretending to be my loving boyfriend has geopolitical consequences, Jaune!"

Jaune: "... I don't even know how to respond to that."

Blake: "Respond by cuddling me and telling me I'm a good kitty!"

Jaune: sigh "Fine."
 
The Riddler in Remnant
The Riddler attempts to challenge RWBY and JNPR in a crime spree. He's in this new world, he has to prove himself.

Eddie: "How do you make the number 7 even without addition, subtraction, multiplication, or division?"

Yang: "... Uhhhh... Ruby? You're the nerd, you answer this."

Ruby: "I'm working on it, I've got calculus-!"

Eddie: "NO CALCULUS!"

Weiss: "That's not fair! It wasn't in the riddle!"

Eddie: "I CHANGED IT!"

Weiss: "How does this prove your superiority in any way?!"

Yang: "Let's not provoke the crazy man holding the city hostage with bombs and puzzles, okay?"

Jaune: "Let's see... Blake? You got anything?"

Blake: "Why would I know?!"

Jaune: "You read a lot?"

Blake: "Not riddles!"

Nora: "Punch!"

Eddie: "What? Punch isn't the answer!"

Nora: "I'll punch you unless you stop holding the city hostage! A lot! Is that a good answer?"

Eddie: "NO!"

Pyrrha: "Um, can we please not blow up the city and just play a riddle game?"

Eddie: "NO!"

Jaune: sighs "DustNet says we just drop the 'S' which makes 'even'..."

Yang: "Oh that's so lame!" grins "Even for me!"

Weiss: "URRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH!"

Riddler: "YOU GOOGLED IT?!"

Jaune: "You're threatening to blow up the city, of course I looked it up online!"

Ruby: "Is that even a riddle?"

Riddler: "UGH! Okay okay, I will... I will give you something simpler. Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?"

Ruby: "Do holidays count?"

Riddler: "THEY DO NOT!"

Jaune: "Do days in different languages count?"

Riddler: "NO!"

Ren: "That sounds very arbitrary-"

Riddler: "IT'S MY RIDDLE, I MAKE THE RULES!"

Jaune: "Uggghhhhh... Uh... Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow?"

Riddler: "YES! FINALLY!"

Ruby: "Does that count? One doesn't even have 'day' in it."

Riddler: "YES IT COUNTS!"

Yang: "Sheesh, okay guy, calm down."

Riddler: "I WILL NOT CALM DOWN! TELLING PEOPLE TO CALM DOWN DOESN'T CALM ANYONE DOWN!"
 
Other DC Villains in Remnant
How would other DC villains react to ending up in Remnant?

Poison Ivy: "So, this is a world where man is finally kept in check by nature!"

Ruby: "Not really. The Grimm aren't natural. They're magic. And they're destroying the biosphere, too."

Poison Ivy: "Oh?"

Ruby: "And they're led by an evil witch-queen."

Poison Ivy: "... Seems that Mother Nature needs a little help on this world..."

Captain Cold, of the Flash villains, would be just fine fighting alongside our heroes. Like most of Flash's Rogues, he's a practical, working class kind of supervillain with a code of ethics.

Captain Cold: "Wait wait wait... You'll pay me to kill as many of these horrible monsters as possible? In as gruesome and terrible of ways I can devise?"

Jaune: "Er, yeah, that's how being a hunter works."

Captain Cold: "I'M GOING LEGIT!"

Of course, mad scientists and megalomaniacs will have their own issues here.

Lex Luthor: "Honestly, I'm disgusted that humanity is reduced to this. Under my leadership, you will flourish."

Weiss: "And I thought my father had an ego problem..."
 
The Riddler in Remnant 2
The Riddler attempts to challenge RWBY and JNPR in a crime spree. He's in this new world, he has to prove himself.

Eddie: "How do you make the number 7 even without addition, subtraction, multiplication, or division?"

Yang: "... Uhhhh... Ruby? You're the nerd, you answer this."

Ruby: "I'm working on it, I've got calculus-!"

Eddie: "NO CALCULUS!"

Weiss: "That's not fair! It wasn't in the riddle!"

Eddie: "I CHANGED IT!"

Weiss: "How does this prove your superiority in any way?!"

Yang: "Let's not provoke the crazy man holding the city hostage with bombs and puzzles, okay?"

Jaune: "Let's see... Blake? You got anything?"

Blake: "Why would I know?!"

Jaune: "You read a lot?"

Blake: "Not riddles!"

Nora: "Punch!"

Eddie: "What? Punch isn't the answer!"

Nora: "I'll punch you unless you stop holding the city hostage! A lot! Is that a good answer?"

Eddie: "NO!"

Pyrrha: "Um, can we please not blow up the city and just play a riddle game?"

Eddie: "NO!"

Jaune: sighs "DustNet says we just drop the 'S' which makes 'even'..."

Yang: "Oh that's so lame!" grins "Even for me!"

Weiss: "URRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH!"

Riddler: "YOU GOOGLED IT?!"

Jaune: "You're threatening to blow up the city, of course I looked it up online!"

Ruby: "Is that even a riddle?"

Riddler: "UGH! Okay okay, I will... I will give you something simpler. Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?"

Ruby: "Do holidays count?"

Riddler: "THEY DO NOT!"

Jaune: "Do days in different languages count?"

Riddler: "NO!"

Ren: "That sounds very arbitrary-"

Riddler: "IT'S MY RIDDLE, I MAKE THE RULES!"

Jaune: "Uggghhhhh... Uh... Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow?"

Riddler: "YES! FINALLY!"

Ruby: "Does that count? One doesn't even have 'day' in it."

Riddler: "YES IT COUNTS!"

Yang: "Sheesh, okay guy, calm down."

Riddler: "I WILL NOT CALM DOWN! TELLING PEOPLE TO CALM DOWN DOESN'T CALM ANYONE DOWN!"

After running around and defusing several bombs around Vale...

Riddler: "Congratulations, you imbeciles! You're not quite as stupid as you look!"

Ruby: "Seriously... You're such a jerk...!"

Riddler: "Now... Solve my last riddle, and maybe you'll have a chance to defuse the last bomb!"

Jaune: "Uggghh... Fine. Give us it."

Riddler: "What walks with four legs in the morning, two legs in the afternoon, and three legs in the evening? NO SEARCHING THE INTERNET!"

Jaune: "Ummmm..."

Pyrrha: "Come on Jaune, you got this!"

Weiss: "Yes, this is literally the most useful you have ever been, Jaune. Don't screw it up!"

Yang: bonks Weiss

Weiss: "OW! What was that for?!"

Yang: "Not. Helping."

Jaune: "Ugggghhh... It was a story my dad told me... Ancient legend... Out of Argus... Uhhhh..."

Ren: "Come on Jaune."

Nora: "You can do it!"

Ruby: "Go go go!"

Riddler: "Clock is ticking, boy!"

Jaune: "Is it... A man?"

Riddler: "... Yes! You are correct!"

Blake: "Wait, a man?"

Jaune: "Yeah. Four legs in the morning, crawling like a baby. Two legs when grown. Three legs in the evening, walking with a cane when you're old. My mom loved that one."

Blake: scowl "Why wouldn't he also accept a Faunus as an answer? Seems bigoted-"

Yang: "No one cares, Blake!"

Riddler: "Well! Since you've proven yourselves somewhat competent... I'll let you defuse the bomb!"

All: "YEAH!"

Riddler: "Upside down while reading the instructions in Hebrew!"

Jaune: "... WHAT?!"

Riddler: "Hey, who said I was playing fair-?"

Jaune: "YOU MOTHERFUCKER!"

Jaune barrels into the Riddler through the reinforced one-way glass and begins waling on him.

Jaune: "YOU! CHEATING! TINY DICKED! SON OF A FUCKING WHORE!"

Riddler: "OW! OW! OW! H-HEY, THIS ISN'T-OW! OW! OW! OW!"

Jaune: "DEFUSE THE BOMB OR JAUNE GO SMASH!"

Riddler: "OKAY OKAY QUIT HITTING ME!"

Riddler defuses the bomb, and he is hauled away by the police... After Jaune's teammates pull him off the annoying supervillain for making another smartass remark.

Ruby: "Wow... How did you know he was behind that glass, Jaune?"

Jaune: "I just thought... If I was the smuggest most annoying cunt in the universe, I'd be right there watching it because I'm such a tiny dicked asshole that motherfucker-Ahem. I'm sorry guys, I lost control."

Nora; "Don't be! That was awesome! The power of friendship and violence triumphed again!"

Yang: "Yeah! Who knew you had it in you?"

Pyrrha is drooling and giggling dreamily over how Jaune beat up that guy...
 
Paperwork Bitch
Ruby goes up to Jaune, looking desperate.

Ruby: "Jaune? Will you marry me?"

The rest of RWBY and JNPR react accordingly.

Yang and Pyrrha: "WHAT?!"

Weiss: "WHAAAAAAT?!"

Nora: "An unexpected twist!"

Blake: flush

Ren: raised eyebrow

Jaune: "... Why?"

Ruby: "Because my team has so much paperwork and I can't do it all by myself! Please, help meeeee?!"

Jaune: "We don't have to get married to do paperwork, Ruby."

Ruby: "With my team, this'll be a lifetime commitment! So we might as well make it official!"

Jaune: "... Yeah, yeah, I can't really fault you for that."

Yang, Blake, and Weiss: "HEY!"

Jaune: "But I can help you out with your paperwork. I got mine done already."

Weiss: "Wha-I've seen the Team Leader paperwork! An imbecile like you couldn't finish it properly-!"

Glynda Goodwitch comes in.

Glynda: "Mister Arc. You've been finishing your team leader paperwork very efficiently."

Jaune: "No problem, Professor! I helped my mom and dad with their paperwork all the time! They wanted me to become a CPA but I decided on a Hunter!"

Glynda: "A CPA you say?"

Jaune: "Yeah! I passed the exam but I headed to Beacon before I got certified-"

Glynda: "Mister Arc. From this moment onward, you are my assistant." Grabs him and drags him off with a happy smile "Yes... Mine. All mine!"

Jaune: "ACK!"

Ruby: "HEY! NO FAIR! I SAW HIM FIRST!"

Later, many people assume that, given how happy Goodwitch is with Arc (and how exhausted he is), their relationship is much more ribald than it appears.

Cardin: "Jaune?"

Jaune: "Yes?"

Cardin: "Nice."

Jaune: "What's nice?"

Cardin: nods "Good, good. You're keeping it cool. Classy, man. Classy."

Jaune: "Ummmm... Sure?"

Yang: "HOW COULD YOU?!"

Jaune: "EH?!"

Yang: "You really went after the old, hot blonde when you could have had the YOUNG hot blonde?!"

Jaune: "Which one? Who?! WHAT?!"

Yang: sniffles "Damnit... You heartbreaker! Why do I have to fall for bad boys?!"

Jaune: "ME?!"

Later...

Jaune: "Everyone's gone crazy, Pyrrha! Everyone thinks I'm-I'm sleeping with Professor Goodwitch!"

Pyrrha: "Oh... O-Oh... So you aren't?"

Jaune: "No! Of course not! What kind of chance do I have with a woman that hot?!"

Pyrrha: "I... I mean... Looks aren't everything, Jaune, and-and you look fine to me!"

Jaune: "Thanks Pyrrha, but feh. Everyone around here looks like a model. And me? I'm just... Ya know... I'm just Jaune."

Pyrrha: "Jaune is more than enough for me. I-I think you have a better chance than you think, with the women around here!"

Jaune: "Really?"

Pyrrha: "Yes!"

Jaune: "Even Miss Goodwitch?"

Pyrrha: "Especially Miss Goodwitch!"

Jaune: "... So you're saying I should go after her?"

Pyrrha: "Wha-NO!"
 
Volume 2 Preview
A preview for the fans;

"Jaune? Jaune! Come down here!"

He'd just finished packing his backpack, making sure Crocea Mors and his armor were strapped securely to it. He'd figure out how to smuggle them out later. He took one last look around at his room. The familiar posters from far off places Aqua and Tangy had sent him, the paintings by Verdy, the models he'd built with Orchid, the bookshelf packed with novels and comics Saphron and Coral had gotten him, the comforter Lilac had knit for him... All of it. One last time.

He headed downstairs, past the walls of photos and pictures of their many, many family members and friends. Right down to the living room. He saw his mother standing there in her usual green dress, her hair up in a ponytail, her glasses on. She glared at him, holding up an envelope as he walked up to her.

"Yeah Mom?"

"Don't you 'yeah Mom' me, what is this?" She demanded, waving the envelop at him. "It's from Beacon! An acceptance letter!"

"Oh, so I got in?" Jaune asked, trying to sound casual even as his mother began a slow burn.

"How did you get in?!" She demanded. "You were supposed to be studying for the Valean Medical Institute!"

"Yeah, I did," Jaune said with a shrug, not meeting her eyes, "I-I got in. I got accepted."

"Then why in the Gods' name is this letter here?!" Mom demanded, tossing it down onto the coffee table. Jaune looked up into her eyes, but could only lock onto her frowning mouth.

"You told me you wanted me to get into VMI. I did that," he said carefully, "But I want... I-I'm going to go to Beacon."

"You're not trained to be a Huntsman!" Mom growled, "You're trained to be a MEDIC! That's why I unlocked your Aura-!"'

"I got in, I took the exam and I passed," Jaune stated flatly, "I-I'll figure out the rest as I go along, okay? I've got six months, I'm in great shape-"

Her fist crushed the letter.

"You're not going to be a Huntsman, Jaune!" Mom snarled. "I won't let you throw your life away! You're going to VMI, and you're GOING to be a doctor!"

"Mom I can help people!" Jaune insisted. "I can fight! I can be a hero-"

Mom scoffed.

"Like who?!"

"Like Auntie Arturia?! Like Great-Uncle Adrian?" Jaune insisted. He bit his lip, but he was in too deep now. "Like you and Dad?!"

His mother's shoulders shook. She turned her icy glare on him, slow and dangerous.

"Is that what you think he was?" Mom demanded, angry and bitter. Jaune's jaw dropped.

"M-Mom... Everyone said... You said-!"

"Your father could have retired!" Mom snarled. "He could have stayed her, worked hard, done some real good! But he just kept going out into harm's way! He... He was SELFISH!"

Jaune's jaw dropped as his heart felt like it was in a vice.

"M-Mom, you don't mean that-!"

"He went off to be a hero and he DIED," Mom stated, anger dripping from every word, "He could have stayed with us and done some actual good! But instead, he decided to be selfish and stupid!"

"He was a hero-!"

"And all we were left was a statue!" Mom shot back. "All I was left with was grief! HE WAS SELFISH! You don't get to be selfish, Jaune!" She waved her finger at him, as his eyes sought out the floor. "You're not going to throw your life away for your stupid, childish dream!"

Jaune's shoulders shook, as a raw rage filled him. His mother kept talking.

"You're going to tell Beacon you can't make it, you're going to get ready for VMI-"

"Why do all my sisters get to choose, but I have to be your vanity project, huh?!" Jaune demanded quickly, still not meeting her gaze, "Why can't you let me choose what to be?!"

"Because you'll choose wrong!" Mom shouted back. "You'll choose the same thing that killed your father! Do you want to be selfish and stupid like him, huh?!"

"He wasn't selfish," Jaune whispered. He slowly looked up into her eyes, fighting back hot, angry tears. "He wasn't selfish, and he wasn't stupid!"

"Jaune, you're not-!"

"YOU WERE!" Jaune snarled. His mother froze, staring at him in anger and confusion.

"Wha-What do you-?!"

"I heard you talking the night before he left," Jaune managed, between ragged pants as the rage seemed to claw its way out of him, "In my room! He asked you to come with you! HE ASKED! You said NO! And if-If you had gone, MAYBE HE'D STILL BE ALIVE!"

His mother's jaw dropped.

"Jaune, how could you-?!"

"You got him killed!" Jaune shouted, the tears falling freely now, "And now you're just a scared, bitter old woman who can't accept it!"

She slapped him. He was nearly knocked right off his feet, but he stayed standing. He looked up, his face grim. His anger just solidified into a hard ball in his chest.

His mother was crying, guilt and hurt on her face. Her hand trembled. She reached out again.

"J-Jaune, wait, please, I didn't mean to-!"

He turned and ran. Right up the stairs. He grabbed his backpack and shouldered it. He threw open the window and leaped out, landing roughly just before his mother could burst into the room. He started running.

"JAUNE! JAUNE, WAIT! I'M SORRY!" He could hear his mother crying out from the window, "PLEASE! JAUNE!"

He stormed off into the night. And he didn't look back...

Coming soon.
 
Jaune Arc's Fantasy Parents
Honestly? I read one or two fics where Tifa and Cloud were Jaune's parents. In addition to adopting Denzel, they had EIGHT more kids and went by Cloud's old clan name, Arc. Jaune still ran off because Tifa and Cloud wanted him to grow up and have a nice, normal life.

Naturally once they learn he's in Vale, they set out to go bring him home. But then Jaune gives them a call... And asks his parents for help during the Breach.

While Grimm was pouring in through the Breach and RWBY and JNPR are fighting furiously.

Weiss: "OK... We need help. Anyone have any ideas?"

Juane:" Yes. I called Mom and Dad for back up. They should be here soon. Dad said he was bringing the heavy artillery."

Yang: "Your parents? How good could your old man be in a fight? Beacon is burning!"

There is the roar of a motorcycle. A blond man wielding a gigantic sword with a beautiful brunette woman behind him drive into the fray.

Cloud Strife drives his motorcycle up a ramp and lands on a Grimm. He then leaps up and slices through fifty Grimm without breaking a sweat

Tifa slid off the back of the cycle and kicked and punched through fifty Grimm before ending it with a Final Heaven to knock one more Grimm up into the air: Which Cloud cut through with a Climhazzard.

They landed and turned to face the Hunters-in-Training.

Everyone's jaws are to the floor... Aside from Jaune, who smiles gratefully.

Jaune: "Mom! Dad!"

Tifa: "JAUNE ARC STRIFE! You are in SO much trouble... After I hug you!" She did so. Cloud hugged his other side "I love you!"

Jaune: sigh "I know. I love you both too."

As the Arcs reunited, a massive shadow fell over the battlefield. Grimm paused, feeling something in the air... before a hail of cannonfire began to rain down from the massive airship. A good 80% of that was coming from a single man on a hanging observation deck; shots of pure energy pulsing from the sleek futuristic cannon grafted in place of his right arm.

Barret: "COME GET SOME YOU BONE-HEADED SONS OF BITCHES! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

A flight of Griffons rose to take the fight to the newly arrived air power... only for a trio of blurs, one green and cream, the other crimson and the last russet and trailing flames, launched themselves from the gondala. A trio of shots rang out, and three massive Nevermores that had been stooping at the civilians near the edge of the city dropped; stone dead. The lead griffon was bisected by a massive throwing star; while the trio following it had their necks ripped out at the spine by leonine claws.

Jaune: GASP! "Uncle Barret! Aunt Yuffie! Uncle Cid, Red, Vincent!"

Cid: "Thanks for that, kid!"

So, how would you fit these worlds together?
 
Jaune Arc's Fantasy Parents 2
Weiss: quietly "That woman has had eight children?! And she looks... Like that?!"

Tifa: smiles gently "Why thank you, Miss Schnee! That's very kind!"

Weiss: blush

Yang: "Holy shit... So cool..." Stares at Jaune "How in the hell are you like this with parents this cool?!"

Cloud: "We wanted him to grow up and enjoy a peaceful life... But since that's not what he wanted, I suppose we'll have to train him properly."

Tifa: "Yes." Grim look.

Jaune: "I... I'm sorry, Mom and Dad. I am sorry for running away... But I'm not sorry for pursuing my dream."

Cloud: "... I suppose I can understand that."

Barret: "A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do."

Tifa: "If this is what you want, Jaune? We'll respect it."

Jaune: "Thank you Mom, Dad... Everyone."

Tifa: "Now..." All smiles "Who wants to see embarrassing baby pictures of Jaune~? I've got plenty~!"

Jaune: "MOMMMMM!"
 
Jaune Arc's Fantasy Parents 3
Ruby hears Jaune talking to someone in the library. She peeks at him from behind a bookshelf. He's talking with a pretty woman with brown hair, green eyes, in a pink dress, red jacket, boots, and her hair up in a pink bow.

Jaune: "Are you sure though?"

Woman: "Very sure. You'll be fine, Jaune. I know you will be."

Jaune: "Thanks, Aunt Aerith."

Aerith: smiles "Don't worry about it."

Ruby: "Oh, hey Jaune! Hey... Uh...?"

Jaune: "Hm? Oh! This is my Aunt Aerith! Aunt Aerith, this is Ruby, my best friend!"

Ruby: "Oh, uh, hey!" Big smile

Aerith: warm smile "Hello dear. I was just checking up on my nephew here."

Ruby: "Wow. I didn't even see you come in!"

Aerith: "Oh, I come and go where I'm needed. Also?" She hugs Ruby

Ruby: "Ah? Uh... Oh... Hugs are nice...?"

Aerith: "Your mother Summer loves you and is very, very proud of you, Ruby. You and Yang both. Can you tell her that for me, Ruby?"

Ruby tears up, and she doesn't know why. She hugs Aerith back and sniffles.

Ruby: "I... I-I will... I will..."

Aerith: "Oh, I'm sorry sweetie. Jaune? You have a handkerchief?"

Jaune: "Yeah."

Aerith lets Ruby go. Jaune wipes her eyes with the handkerchief and hugs her too.

Jaune: "Hey, you okay?"

Ruby: "Y-Yeah... Hey, wait a minute, how do you know my mom-?"

Aerith is gone. Ruby gapes and looks around.

Ruby: "Huh?! What?! Where?!"

Jaune: "Ah, yeah... She does that..."
 
Cardin and Velvet Idea
- - -

It had taken Cardin longer than he would have liked to find time to corner Velvet when she was alone. He really could only blame himself for that: Ever since he'd bullied her, her team had stayed clustered around her. She'd stuck with them, and when he was around, they got even more protective: Just glaring at him the whole time.

It really was pure luck he'd seen her photographing things in the Beacon Gardens. He hadn't been able to muster up the courage to go up to her right away, he was too surprised. He'd hid immediately and watched her. When he'd finally pulled himself together, Coco had shown up and they'd walked off together.

So, for a week, whenever he could, he'd staked out the gardens, hoping she would show up.

He knew it was verging on the obsessive, maybe even stalker-like behavior, but... He had to.

He watched near a pillar, trying to focus on his homework, to look like he wasn't anxious about anything. He kept looking up, then down.

The image of a predator being nervous around a bunny entered his mind. He didn't laugh.

After who knows how long, he looked up... And saw her. She was walking gracefully through the garden, her photography gear with her. She stopped in front of a bed of red and yellow flowers, and began to set up. He waited, gritting his teeth.

Finally, she was so fully set up that even an Aura-unlocked person couldn't run away too quickly. He got up, and dusted himself off. He took a few deep, calming breaths.

He slowly walked towards her. He knew her hearing would pick him up almost immediately, but he kept his pace even and calm.

She looked up, locked her eyes on him. They went wide, and he held up his arms.

"Wait! Wait, please," he said, "I'm... I'm not going to hurt you or anything. I promise."

She still backed away from him, her ears twitching. He took a step forward, and she took one back.

"What do you want?" She demanded, quiet but angry, with her eyes were fixated on his. He opened his mouth, and tried to start. Nothing came out. He tried again... Still nothing.

"I..."

She scowled and turned away.

"I'm leaving," Velvet stated, reaching for her camera.

"I'm sorry!"

She froze. He took a deep breath and continued.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry for bullying you. I'm sorry for insulting you. I'm sorry for grabbing your ears and... And everything," he said. "It was wrong."

She was silent. She slowly turned to stare at him, still distrustful.

"... What do you want?" She asked. Cardin shook his head, and sighed.

"I... I don't want anything. I just... I wanted to say it. I... I had to say it. I wanted to say it sooner, but... Well..." He shrugged. "I kind of made that impossible."

"Why?" Velvet asked, blinking. Cardin shook his head.

"Does it matter?"

"Of course it matters," Velvet stated, "If you... If you want me to think you're sincere... If you want me to believe you, you have to explain."

Cardin sighed heavily. He looked down at the ground, then back up at Velvet.

"Okay," he said. "Can... Can we do it... Somewhere more private-?"

"N-No," Velvet said. He winced. She winced back.

"I mean..." She sighed. "Just... Sit here, okay?" She patted a stone bench near the flower bed. He walked over to it, slowly, calmly. He didn't want to spook her, then he might never get another chance like this.

He sat down on the bench, feeling a bit like a kid in timeout as she stood over him with a frown.

"Well? Why?" She asked.

He sighed. He kept his eyes on the ground.

"... My grandpa... My uncles... My mom's family... They all got killed by Faunus, most in the Revolution," he said, "I grew up hearing about what they did. What they faced. What they fought. My grandpa Absolom... He was seen as a mass murderer by Faunus. And Faunus kids in my schools... They called me the same. So did Faunus teachers. If they were all going to hate me... Why shouldn't I hate back?"

She was silent. He found it in himself to keep going.

"I talked to my parents after... After stuff happened in Forever Fall," he said. "Professor Goodwitch had told them what I'd done. All the bullying."

Velvet's feet shifted.

"What did they do?" She asked.

Cardin sighed.

"First... They smacked me around for being such an asshole," he mumbled, "And then they told me that... Everything aside? They didn't hate Faunus. They hated White Fang, because they're the ones who killed Grandpa. They hated the Revolutionaries for what they did, but... Not Faunus in general. Especially not ones who had never done anything to them... Or me."

He shook his head.

"Look... You don't have to forgive me, okay? But I... I had to apologize. Because... Because they're right. You didn't do anything to me. Just because I'm a Winchester doesn't mean I get to be a prick. I should be more than some bully."

She was silent. He very slowly pushed himself up to his feet.

"That's... That's all I have to say," he said quietly. He turned to go.

"... Wait."

He paused and looked back at her. She frowned, but it was a compassionate frown.

"I... My grandpa, well..." She clutched at her arm nervously, "He told me about the Revolution. How... How Faunus did terrible things to humans, sometimes. How he was glad we got our freedom, but... That some humans had every right to hate us back."

Cardin blinked. Velvet sighed.

"He told me... He told me to not judge people by anything but their character. And that people who realize when they're wrong, and apologize, with no expectation of a reward? Those... Those are good people."

She smiled softly at him.

"I... I just wanted you to know? I do forgive you, Cardin. And I-I think you're a good person."

She really had chosen a good place for photography. The lighting, the shadows... It all seemed to make her smile, skin, and eyes glow.

His cheeks turned red.

"Uh... Yeah, well... Thanks," he muttered, turning away.

"I'll uh, I'll tell my team you're okay now," she added.

Cardin nodded.

"That's good. Thanks."

"And uh..." She swallowed. "If you'd like to... To talk? Any time? I... I'm here every Wednesday same time. If... If you'd like?"

Cardin very slowly nodded and shrugged as he shoved his hands into his pockets.

"I... I guess?"

Velvet smiled.

"Great! Great..."

Cardin turned and began to walk away. It had gone better than he could have hoped for. She'd forgiven him, and that had felt so much better than he thought it could have.

Now she wanted to see him more often? What the hell was that about?

Still. Maybe he'd take her up on her offer. Just so she wouldn't complain to her teammates about him being a jerk, or something.

The last thing he needed was to get in more trouble.

Yeah. That's all it was.

- - -

Because Tsundere!Cardin is Best!Cardin!
 
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Bad Kitty
"You won't get away with kidnapping me and Ren, Adam! Blake, and the others will find us!"

"That's precisely what you should be worried about, human. Here, let me show you the diary she left behind, and bear witness to what was born from that depraved mind. She had plans for me, and likely for you and your friend now as well...."

That, or her yaoi fangirl shipping tendencies piss Jaune off enough he loses his temper.

Jaune: "Damnit you horny kitty, I've had enough!" Yanks her onto his lap, and spanks her "BAD KITTY! BAD KITTY! BAD! BAD! BAD!"

Blake: "NYAAAAAHHHH~!"

Jaune: "Now... Are you going to be bad any more?"

Blake: "... N-No..."

Jaune: "Are you going to be good?"

Blake: "Y-Yes...!"

Jaune: Hugs her "It's okay... It's okay... Sorry..."

Jaune is remembering how he had to spank some of his younger sisters... And Blake isn't.

Jaune: "All right? I didn't want to do that. I'm sorry... If you want to report me-"

Blake: "N-NO! No! Not at all! I... Um... I did need that... And uh... I might need it again."

Jaune: "... Huh?"

Blake: "As... Reinforcement. To... To not do bad things anymore."

Jaune: "... I mean... Okay... If you think it can help, I... I'm willing to do it."

Blake: "Oh, it will."

Later...

Blake: "Jaune, I-I need to be punished again! For being a bad kitty!"

Jaune: sigh "Again? I'm sure it wasn't that bad-"

Blake: "It was! The worst!"

Jaune: "Fine. Hop on."

Pyrrha: "Jaune! I've also... Been a bad girl! You-You should spank me, too!"

Jaune: "No you haven't, Pyrrha."

Pyrrha: "... I lied about being bad!"

Jaune: sigh
 
After the Fall: Jaune and Neo
- - -

Reclaiming Vale was an arduous process. But before they went after Cinder, Ruby decided they needed to do as much as they could for Vale. Jaune had agreed whole heartedly, as had Ren, Nora, and Yang.

They'd fought like hell, and accomplished a lot in the last few days: They'd restarted Vale's automated defenses, cleansing them of the virus Cinder had uploaded. That alone had shifted the tide, driving the Grimm out slowly but surely. They'd killed that fucking Dragon: Not easily, and Ruby had to unleash her Silver Eyes again at great strain, but they'd killed the damn thing. That had let them reclaim Beacon, and the CCT was under repair.

Pyrrha had been half-avenged. It wasn't much in Jaune's mind, but it was a start.

Atlas had finally returned and provided reinforcements. And their exploits were being spread far and wide to give hope to everyone to further beat back the Grimm.

So now, Jaune and his friends were on search and rescue patrol. Going through the now mostly-Grimm cleared areas of the city to look for survivors, or slaughter remaining Grimm.

Jaune was in the warehouse district with Ruby. She had taken off to scout ahead, while Jaune swept through the mostly empty storage places. He was on guard, eyes peeled as he swept through carefully. His ears were alert for anything, a snarl, a growl, a cry for help...

He heard... Beeps?

Jaune cautiously entered a warehouse that had weathered the invasion almost perfectly. He walked through a maze of crates and boxes, spotting a faint light near the far wall.

He turned a corner... And saw a small, curvy woman in familiar clothing, sitting on a bedspread with her back to him. Her head was bowed as she texted on a Scroll, over and over again.

Neo, he thought. He held up his sword and slowly approached her. He knew she was incredibly dangerous. Hell, she might just be luring him into a trap to knife him.

He walked up right behind her, sword at the ready. He looked over her shoulder at her Scroll screen.

Are you there, Roman?

Where are you?

It's Neo. Please come get me.

Are you there, Roman?

Where are you?"

It's Neo. Please come get me.


Over and over and over. Jaune watched her for a while, as she robotically tapped out the texts and sent them. She slowly looked back over her shoulder at him, staring blankly.

She was filthy. Thin. And so small...

He sucked in a breath.

"... Roman Torchwick... Your boss, right?"

Neo didn't move.

"He's not coming back. He's dead," Jaune stated, more bitter than he meant to but... He still remembered finding Pyrrha's broken Milo up on the top of Beacon Tower.

Neo stared at him, and slowly nodded. She tapped out something on the screen.

I know that.

"Then... Then why are you...?" Jaune asked, but trailed off. The look of... Emptiness in her eyes was so haunting. She tapped out another message.

I'm a discarded tool. I have no master. So there's nothing to do but wait.

"Wait for what?"

Neo was silent. Jaune sucked in a deep breath. Slowly, he reached out and rested a hand on her shoulder. She flinched, but didn't do anything else.

"No... No. You can't give up," he said softly.

He knew what this woman had done. He knew what she was, and yet...

I already have, she typed out.

Jaune licked his lips.

"You... You said you're a tool, right?"

She stared at him. Jaune nodded.

"Then... Then you're my tool now. You're mine. I'm stealing you. You... You're mine now," he stated firmly.

Neo stared, uncomprehendingly at first. She tapped out another message.

Why would you want me?

"Because Cinder's still out there," Jaune stated, "And we both want her dead."

Neo stared for a time, silent... Before she smiled. It was both heartwarmingly innocent and yet terrifying.

"Work for me... And we both get what we want," he said firmly.

He reached out his hand to her. She stared at it for a moment, before she grasped it. He pulled her up. She clumsily clambered onto his back, and he helped her up.

She snuggled against his warmth, and he tolerated it despite how bad she smelled. She was very warm, and despite waiting to die, she still had soft curves-

Nope. not gonna think about that, Jaune thought.

He carried Neo out of the warehouse, just in time for Ruby to appear out of a cloud of petals.

"Jaune, where were you? I was about to call-" She hefted up Crimson Crescent, "Jaune?! How-What-?!"

"It's okay," he said quickly, "It's okay... She's on our side now. Sort of."

He hoped...

- - -
 
Ozpin the Shipper
That would be pretty OP.

I need Weiss and Winter battling over Jaune.

Ozpin calls Jaune into his office.

Ozpin: "Hello my boy. How are you finding Beacon?"

Jaune: "Oh, uh, great so far, Headmaster! Yup! It's challenging, uh, since-"

Ozpin: "You entered as a civilian with no training and falsified transcripts?"

Jaune: "Yeah, I-... Oh shit-"

Ozpin: "Hahaha! Relax, young man! Do you really think your friends Miss Valkyrie and Mister Ren could attend proper combat schools while living as wandering, homeless orphans? Or that Miss Belladonna had any formal education while she was a terrorist with White Fang? You passed the Initiation, and that's what matters!"

Jaune: "Oh... Oh thank God. So... So I'm not expelled?"

Ozpin: "Not in the slightest! However... I must request a favor."

Jaune: "Well... I mean, sure? I guess?"

Ozpin: "Jaune. It is a terrible shame your family didn't want you to become a Huntsman, because the Arcs have an incredibly powerful trait: Massive Aura reserves, and Semblances that massively increase Aura in general. Indeed, you have more Aura than me despite our considerable age difference!"

Jaune: "Wow, really?"

Ozpin: "Yes. Properly trained, you will become a great Huntsman, of that I have no doubt... But we must look to the future!"

Jaune: "The future?"

Ozpin: nods "Imagine Huntresses like Miss Nikos, Miss Rose, Miss Xiao-Long, Miss Schnee, Professor Goodwitch and Miss Belladonna. Their incredible Semblances and fighting abilities. Imagine if they had massive Aura reserves to boost their abilities. They would be unstoppable."

Jaune: "Oh... Oh! You think my Semblance might let them become even more powerful?"

Ozpin: "Yes! I suspect that it could! Once you unlock it, if my guess is right based on past members of the Arc family, you'll be able to supercharge them and act as both a Healer and an able Support, while also being tough enough to fight up close!"

Jaune: "Wow... I-I could be... I could be a big help?"

Ozpin: "You could be a tremendous help, Jaune! But you're thinking too small. Again, consider the future. What if there were dozens of such Huntsmen and Huntresses with your massive Aura reserves? Raised by kind, loving parents to protect mankind?"

Jaune: "Uh... Well that would be great, Headmaster. Are you asking me to donate my genetic material or something-?"

Ozpin: "No no no, nothing that impersonal, I'm not some Atlasian mad scientist! No, I think the old fashioned way would be best. And given your parents? You'll have no trouble handling it!"

Jaune: "Handling what?"

Ozpin hands over a book. Jaune reads the title.

Jaune: "... 'How to Manage a Harem'?!"

Ozpin: beams "What do you say?"

Jaune: "..."

Five seconds later, Jaune is at the elevator, frantically hitting the call button.

Ozpin: sighs "I see I'll have to be more persuasive..."
 
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Jaune and Yang: Confidence
jaune_x_yang_by_aoneko90_d7ccgk1-pre.jpg


Jaune: "Heh... Thanks Yang."

Yang: "Honestly, how have you not figured this out by now? What kind of a man doesn't know how to tie his own tie?"

Jaune: "Well... Maybe it's a man who wants to look into the eyes of a beautiful woman up close."

Yang stops, and stares at him. He blushes, but smiles back. She turns bright red.

Yang: "Maybe... Maybe you should save lines like that for Weiss, h-huh Ladykiller?"

Jaune: "Maybe I want to use them on a girl who might appreciate them more? One... One I really admire, and think would be a lot of fun to go out with?"

Yang: "... Y-You... You're asking me out?"

Jaune: "Yup."

Yang: "Right now? Just like that?"

Jaune: "Just like that."

Yang: "... I-I mean... But... Why?"

Jaune: "Why not? We both care about Ruby. We both like dancing... Does it have to be any more complicated than that?"

Yang: "I... I-I guess not... It's just... Weird, hearing you act so... So suave."

Jaune: smiles "I... Had a talk with my dad. Helped straighten me out. So... Is that a yes, or a no?"

Yang: "... S-Sure. This Friday?"

Jaune: "Sounds great." He takes her hands, and ties his tie "Pick you up at 7?"

Yang: nods "Yeah!"

Jaune: "Great. See you then." He smiles again, and heads off

Yang watches him go, still blushing


Yang: ... What the hell just happened, and why do I like it?

- - -


Again, I'm a sucker for Dragonslayer and this image inspired this snippet. Any thoughts on how this confident Jaune came to be, and where it might go?
 
Expeditions Into the Past
Here's a fun means for a lot of plots. Archaeological expeditions out to Grimm territory to explore things. Protected by Hunters.

Jaune: yawns "Another Grimm. Right flank. Nora, smash. Ren, shoot them up. Pyrrha, let's go and slaughter them. Mind the gully they're hiding in."

Much slaughter ensues and soon the team is returning to the fortress, which is in the center of a massive ruined city. The archaeologists are hard at work digging, studying, and cataloging things. Meanwhile, Jaune looks about the ruins, impressed.

Jaune: "Wow... They must have lived like gods!"

Nora: "Hmph! Some Gods."

Jaune: "But they had a monorail!"

Ren: "What's a monorail?"

Jaune: "No idea. But it sounds awesome."

Nora: "A train with one rail, I guess. Didn't do them much good... since they're dead!"

Jaune: "Everyone dies, Nora. Stop being a downer."

Nora: "Being a downer? Nah! I'm actually making fun of these guys for having all this useless junk... and it not really helping when they all died."

Jaune: "How were they supposed to know unholy monsters immune to weapons without Dust were going to rise up and destroy everything they knew and loved? You wouldn't have known!"

Ren: "It is rather sad. Seeing all the ruins of what humanity once accomplished. With us now reduced to living in small, walled off cities. Where once our cities covered the world."

Jaune: "Geez..."

Pyrrha: "It's poignant to think that we're what's left of this."

Jaune: "Look, negative thoughts attract Grimm, so please-Lighten up!"

Pyrrha: "Yes, that's why these missions are so hard."

Ren: "Fine... Nora. Your hair looks lovely today."

Nora: "Thanks Ren, yours too."

Ren: "Maybe we should stop using the gimp mask so much if you have to work so hard to fix it in the mornings."

Nora: She laughs.

Jaune: sighs "..." Grim determination "Well one day... We're going to walk out of our fortress cities and the Grimm will be no more. And we can rebuild all of this."

Pyrrha: "Or we'll build something new." She smiles "Places with bad memories attract Grimm, too."

Jaune: "And we can once again listen to..." He rummaged in a pile of junk and pulled out a CD "... Stevie... Nix? That name isn't a color." Pause "Or is it?"

Pyrrha: "I like her Fleetwood Mac days." She takes the CD.

Jaune: "You know who that is?!"

Pyrrha: "The Queen of Rock indeed."

Jaune: "What else do you know about these ancient times?"

Pyrrha: blush "I um... I just collect music I find." She stuffs it in her satchel.

Jaune: "Wow..."

Pyrrha: "It's the things they created and wanted to share. They won't mind if we take it."
 
Uncle Jaune
Obviously, Jaune's sister Saphron had not been conceived of when the show started. But I love the idea of her visiting Beacon in Volumes 1-3 and asking Jaune to babysit little Adrian while she goes and does... Stuff.

Jaune; sigh "She handed me off to random family members when I was a baby too, kid."

Adrian: "Apuh!"

So Jaune lugs his baby nephew around Beacon, feeding him, taking care of him, and perhaps getting into misadventures/child endangerment.

- - -

Jaune sighed as he entered Combat Class. He could feel Professor Goodwitch's eyes on him, as intense and probing as an X-Ray machine. Adrian, given he was a baby, just babbled obliviously as his wide eager eyes looked around at the combat class from the baby carrier he was strapped into against Jaune's chest.

"My sister needed a babysitter and dumped my nephew on me again, Professor," Jaune said, "I swear he won't be any trouble."

"See that he isn't," Goodwitch stated in her usual calm, controlled tone. He walked over to his seat with Teams JNPR and RWBY, and unstrapped his nephew. He held him in his lap, and pulled out a pacifier. The baby whined a bit, but began to suckle contently as his uncle rocked him.

"You're very good at that, Jaune," Pyrrha said with a warm smile.

"Seven sisters," Jaune replied blandly. Adrian grasped onto Jaune's tie, and without looking, Jaune carefully untangled himself from his nephew and slid a baby toy into his fist instead, "You pick things up."

Weiss was already moving to try and sit next to Jaune, but surprisingly, Yang beat her to the seat. She scowled at the busty brawler as Yang cooed over Adrian.

"Aw... He's so cute," Yang murmured, "What's his dad like?"

"Don't know," Jaune said with a shrug, "My sister married a woman and they got an anonymous sperm donor."

"Really?" Ruby asked, peering over Jaune's shoulder, "Cause he looks a lot like you, Jaune!"

Jaune shrugged.

"My sister's wife carried him. I guess they got a good match?" He stroked Adrian's head, frowning. Funny enough, he had donated to the sperm bank for 'medical testing purposes' when he turned 16. Could it be that...?

Nah. That was ridiculous. Surely his sister and sister-in-law would have told him, right?

- - -

Somewhere, Saphron and Terra Cotta-Arc sneezed.

- - -

Still, maybe since he had his nephew, he'd get out of fighting-

"Jaune Arc, you will fight Cardin Winchester," Goodwitch stated firmly.

Jaune sighed. Of course, he thought to himself.

"Hey, uh-"

"I've got him," Yang said quickly, before Pyrrha could. She took little Adrian into her arms and rocked him. The baby squirmed a little, but settled down against Yang's chest. She beamed at him.

"Go get 'em, Daddy!"

"Thanks," Jaune deadpanned. He looked at Pyrrha, who smiled encouragingly.

"Don't fight for yourself," she said softly, "Focus on fighting for your nephew."

Jaune looked into his nephew's bright, innocent eyes. How he stared at him with open happiness. He smiled back.

"Yeah... Thanks Pyrrha, I will," Jaune said.

- - -

He'd gone to the locker room, changed, and entered the ring. Cardin faced him, the taller boy, as ever, ready to fight. Sure they'd sorted things out at Forever Fall (kind of), but he was still a dick.

That said... Jaune realized he was going to have to fight Cardin until he beat him. He glanced over at his baby nephew, looking at him as he sat in Yang's lap. Weiss, Pyrrha, and Ruby fussed over him, but the baby kept his eyes on him.

Jaune took a deep breath and got into his fighting stance.

"You will fight until your Aura falls into the red or ring out," Goodwitch stated, "Begin!"

Jaune immediately went on the offensive, just as Pyrrha taught him. He closed in and got in Cardin's guard, striking hard and fast! Cardin swung his mace around but Jaune ducked and got in a hit!

Cardin fell back, but rallied with an aggressive series of strikes, trying to force Jaune back. Again, he used his smaller size and improved footwork to dance around the blows. One hit his shield, but Jaune angled his shield to disperse most of the momentum, and used the gap to get in another hit!

"Ugh!" Cardin cried, swinging his fist at Jaune. Jaune fell back as he took the hit to his cheek, again grateful for training with his team and Pyrrha. That hit hurt, but he was still on his feet.

The fight went on, Jaune just barely able to see his aura level on the main screen overhead while he kept up his assault. Cardin was, for the first time, much lower on Aura than him! Cardin was even breathing hard, angry, incredulous at how things were going!

Cardin tried to unleash a blast of Fire Dust from his mace, to get a hit on Jaune, but he used his shield to bash the mace away. Even as the Fire Dust exploded deafeningly loud next to him, he swung his sword. Cardin tried to deflect it with his gauntlet, and caught the blade on the metal. But Jaune recalled Pyrrha's training, bent his elbow, and rammed it into Cardin's side. He then twisted his hips and slammed his pommel up into Cardin's chin!

The taller young man grunted and fell back. Jaune held back a grin. He was close, so close, he was going to win, for the first time he was going to win-!

"WAAAAAAHHHH! WAAAAAAHHHHH!"

Even over the ringing in his ears, he could make out Adrian's cry. He glanced over out of the ring: His nephew was crying, screaming in fear or need. His teammates were trying to calm him, with waving toys, funny faces, or rubbing his tummy-But Adrian wasn't having any of it!

Jaune glanced at Cardin. He was still staggered, on his last ropes...

Adrian cried again.

"I forfeit!" Jaune said quickly, running and jumping over the ring railing. He put down his sword and shield as he rushed over to his crying nephew. Yang gaped at him in shock as he pulled Adrian into his arms.

"There there, I'm here, it's okay," Jaune murmured soothingly, rubbing Adrian's back and head as the baby cried into his chest. The baby boy calmed down, his whimpers vanishing as he clung to Jaune's chest.

"There you go, everything's okay, buddy," Jaune whispered, kissing Adrian's head. "There you go, you're okay, aren't you buddy?"

Adrian sniffled and Jaune pulled him up so he could nuzzle against Jaune's throat. Jaune chuckled, and nuzzled his baby nephew.

"There you go... There you go..."

He finally looked up... And flushed. Everyone in class was staring at him. The girls in particular were giving him... Almost gooey looks? Some of the boys looked approving, in a manly sort of way. Ren included.

"... Winner, Cardin Winchester," Professor Goodwitch said, in a softer tone than she normally used.

Cardin groaned as he staggered up to his feet. He scowled over at Jaune, and sighed.

"Yeah, sure I did," he muttered, sounding depressed.

- - -

Obvious inspiration is obvious. Vendetta543's fic "Jaune's Baby-Making Arc". But it was too cute not to do.
 
Knightshade Visit
Let's see... Another stupid idea.

- - -

The fall of Vale and Beacon were horrible. And after Adam had maimed Yang and stabbed her? Blake just couldn't deal with it. As long as Adam was obsessed with her, none of her friends would be safe.

So she'd fled to Menagerie, like a coward. Her parents, despite everything, had welcomed her home. Doted on her. Forgiven her.

That was the worst part. That they... They could still look at her with love, and not hatred. Like she did when she looked at herself in the mirror.

She'd spent most of her time recovering from her injuries. She'd tried to keep up with the news as best she could-Even with the CCT down, radio and other forms of communication were being used. The situation in Vale had been bad, but it was getting better slowly. The CCT might soon be fully restored.

She didn't hear anything about her friends. She tried so hard not to think about what that meant, but her guilt fueled her nightmares.

It was during one night that there was a commotion at the gates to the Belladonna manse. Blake stirred from her horrible sleep, still wincing a bit at the pain in her side. Her ears perked up as she heard her mother approaching. She was on her feet before Kali Belladonna opened the door.

"Mother? What is it?" Blake asked.

Kali didn't look alarmed-If anything, she looked somewhat amused.

"Blake sweetie, there's a human here," she said, "He claims to be your friend."

Blake blinked.

"A-A human boy?"

Kali held up her Scroll, and showed a recent picture. It took a moment for Blake to recognize him, as the face was thinner and the eyes were narrowed.

"Jaune Arc?!" She gasped. She stared up at Kali. "H-How did he-?!"

Kali's amusement increased.

"Oh, so you do know him!" Kali beamed, "I think I'll let him explain it with you present. He's made a lot of trouble for the guards."

"Him?!" Blake asked in disbelief.

- - -

Blake dressed and accompanied her mother down to a meeting room just off the main entrance hallway. There, at least ten guards were holding the struggling young man down. Her father, Ghira, calmly sipped his tea as he sat and watched.

"Father, please, let him go!" Blake insisted, "I know him! He's a friend!"

Well... More a friend of a friend, but-That didn't matter.

"Release him," Ghira said, still calm. The guards, all with Auras activated, began to pull away from Jaune... But the boy shoved them all away as he stood up, panting angrily.

Blake's eyes widened. He'd certainly never been that strong back at Beacon.

"Good," Ghira said with a nod, "Now, leave us."

"Sir!" The lead guard protested, "He's a human, and he's armed! He snuck in and could be an assassin-!"

"And he fooled you all by wearing cheap cologne and this," Ghira stated, holding up a pair of bunny ears on a headband.

The guards all looked appropriately embarassed. Blake's jaw dropped, and she stared in utter disbelief at Jaune.

"How... Wha-?"

"I actually didn't think it would work," Jaune admitted, smiling with a shrug, "But my dad told me as long as you look like you know what you're doing and that you belong? You can go almost anywhere."

"Take that as a lesson, Captain," Ghira stated, "Now go, and write up a thorough report on your failure."

Properly chastened, the guards filed out, many glaring at Jaune as they went. Kali shut the doors behind them, and smiled pleasantly.

"Welcome to Kuo Kuana, Mister Arc! You mind if I call you Jaune?"

"Uh, not at all, ma'am," Jaune said, bowing, "Er, do I bow? You are king and queen, right?"

"Chieftain, and only if you wish to," Ghira said, as Kali went to a cupboard to put together snack trays. "I must salute you, Jaune. Making the journey here from Vale could not have been easy."

"Uh, thanks," He said. He finally turned to Blake. "Hey Blake."

"Hello Jaune," Blake murmured, unsure of how to respond. She'd barely said a few words to Jaune the whole time, and couldn't fathom why he was here.

"I have... Some messages," he said. "From Ruby, Yang, and some others."

"They're okay?!" Blake gasped. Jaune nodded.

"Yeah. They all are. From Ruby?"

Jaune walked up... And hugged Blake tightly. She stiffened at the contact, but... Melted into it. She hadn't had a lot of physical contact outside of her parents, and just getting hugged like this was... Kind of nice.

"She'll be very glad you're okay," he said. He pulled back and took a deep breath. He winced.

"And Yang..."

He sighed.

"She told you to hit me, didn't she?" Blake asked.

"No, she wants to do that herself," he stated. Blake nodded.

"... It's all right," Blake murmured. "I-I'm sorry-"

Anger flared in his eyes.

"Don't say it to me," Jaune stated, glaring at her, "Say it to them."

"Are... Are they coming here?" She asked.

"No," Jaune said, "We've been helping Vale recover. It's now mostly under control. So now? We're going after Cinder. And we... We need you. Ruby needs you."

Blake turned away.

"I... I can't do that," she murmured. Jaune's eyes widened.

"What?! Why?!"

"I..." Blake looked down.

"Why don't we table that discussion for now?" Ghira asked. "There is the matter of you sneaking into Kuo Kuana, after all. Friend of my daughter's or not, that is illegal for any human to do."

Jaune worked his jaw with a wince. He got on his knees and put his forehead on the floor before them.

"I'm sorry, sir," he said, "I made a promise to find her, and bring her back. I always keep my word. I'll accept any punishment-"

"Don't!" Blake said quickly. "Please, don't Father. He...He's my friend."

Ghira stared for a long moment before he nodded.

"Very well. I respect a man who keeps his promises. And we have never had a human guest for dinner before." He smirked slightly. "Especially a friend of my daughter's."

Jaune winced again.

"Ah, I mean... We're kind of-"

"We are friends, Father," Blake interjected, "We are very good friends."

She took his hand for emphasis.

"Well, any friend of Blake's is a friend of ours!" Kali tittered. "Especially such a handsome one!"

Blake groaned on the inside.

- - -

Again, just popped in there.
 
Knightshade Visit 2
Afterwards, Jaune gets a room at the manor. He can't sleep. He wanders around and meets Blake. And they just... Talk, as they look up at the stars.

Jaune: "... We never really did this, huh?"

Blake: "No... I'm sorry."

Jaune: "Don't. It..." sigh "It... Feels like a lifetime ago, huh?"

Blake: "Yeah... Yeah, it does."

Jaune: "We should have invited you to play board games with us more."

Blake: "We..... should have accepted more often."

Jaune: "It... It would have been nice."

Silence falls. Then:

Blake: "... How did... How did you help Yang?"

Jaune: "... We argued a lot. Actually hit each other..." sigh "She's a lot better now. It's all I could do..."

Blake: "Jaune-"

Jaune: "I just... Ruby asked me to do it. And I did it... Because no one else would. That's... This is all I can do. She was so lost, so hurt... Nora and Ren too. All I could do was hold them together, as best I could. Try to keep them going, to be strong for them..." sighs "That's all I'm good for."

Blake: "No, no! You're... You're so much more than that Jaune."

Jaune: "... I... You know... I just... I don't understand why you're blaming yourself. You... You could fight. You did fight... You knew what you were doing."

Blake: shakes her head, and lets out a scoffing laugh "Jaune... None of us knew what we were doing. I was running away from the White Fang and pretending I was a human, Weiss was trying to escape her father while being the perfect Schnee daughter at the same time, Yang just wanted to have adventures every day, and Ruby was fifteen and missed finishing middle school and wanted to live a fairy tail."

Jaune: "And how am I any better? I... I was the dolt. The deadlast! The weak link-!"

He's fighting back tears. Blake hugged him tightly.

Blake: "You've done better than I've done. Jaune... If more people showed kindness to others, if more people empathized about their pain and shared it instead of taking it out on others... We would live in a better world."

Jaune: "Blake..."

Blake: She smiled sadly "If Pyrrha saw that side of you, then she was right. She saw what we were all too self-absorbed to see. You're not the weakest, you might just be the strongest of us crazy, damaged hero-wannabe teenagers. You kept going... Where the rest of us just fell apart, or ran away."

Jaune looked away, blushing. He stared out at the faunus city.

Jaune: "... I just... I still wish it was me instead of her. Why should someone so amazing live... And someone like me just...?"

Blake: "Then.... you have to live for her. She loved you enough to risk fighting someone that strong alone. So live. I might have not known her that long. All of RWBY might have barely known her.... but everyone knew. She always shined the brightest around you."

Jaune: "I was too stupid to see it... She kissed me and told me she loved me before she shoved me in that locker... I... The whole time... I was too stupid to see it." sigh "... Or maybe I did, and I just... I didn't think I deserved it."

Blake: "And she was too scared to say. And there wasn't enough time. But do you regret knowing her?"

Jaune: shakes his head, says it with deadly certainty "Never."

Blake: "Then love her, even now, even when she's gone. Maybe you couldn't back then, but love her now. Your feelings matter, and if she's watching us, watching you... She'll know."

Jaune: "... Can I ask you something?"

Blake: "What?"

Jaune: "... Why did you run away?"

Blake bowed her head.

Blake: "... Because my best friend had gotten her arm chopped off and stabbed through the gut. Because she was my friend. Because I brought her into that fight, just by being around her."

She looked out at the night sky too.

Blake: "Everything I touch... was poisoned from the inside, by my presence. I try and try and... And all I do is fail." She sniffled "I failed to change the White Fang, I failed to protect my friends, I... All I can do is come here and try to help but... But all I do is-is fail."

Jaune: "Blake..."

Blake: sigh "You... You should go back. You think they need me? They don't. Everything you've done... They need you, more than me."

Jaune: "Blake... I made a promise to bring you back. They see something worth fighting for in you. If you... If you're telling me I'm worth something? Then trust me, you're better than me in every way. You... You're a princess, a freedom fighter-!"

Blake: "-And a coward. I meant it before, Jaune... You were the strongest of all of us."

Jaune: "I'm still a horrible failure."

Blake: cries softly, leans against him "... Then we're both failures..."

They turn to stare at the stars in silence.

- - -


Or something like this. Because again, we needed some goddamned catharsis.
 
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Goodwitch Needs a Drink
"PROFESSOR GOODWITCH!"

Glynda Goodwitch does not jump, she's far too controlled for that, but she does arch an eyebrow at the distraught Nora Valkyrie barging into her office.

"Yes, Miss Valkyrie?"

"I have a maiden's dilemma!" She cried, "And I was hoping you could help me?"

Glynda Goodwitch blinked, and mentally sighed. She gestured to a chair in front of her desk. Nora takes it, worrying her lower lip as she clutches at her skirt.

"I will help you if I can, Miss Valkyrie. What is it?" She asked.

Nora took a deep breath.

"Since Renny and I were orphaned, he's taken care of me. He's been there for me. When we hit puberty, I-I started feeling... Kind of the same but different for him," she explained, "Like, I still want to be with him and his wonderful pancakes, but also have his children and introduce them to the wonder of his pancakes!"

Goodwitch very slowly nodded.

"Yes... And?"

"And, well... He never seems to take any hints that I WANT to be his wife, mother of his children, and sex slave!" Nora cried. She shook her head vehemently, "But that's okay. I'm patient... Or at least, I thought I was!"

She shook her head.

"Then... Then we met Jaune-Jaune! And he was amazing! He listens, he cares about me, he takes care of me... And now... NOW..." She sniffled. "He... He made me crepes!"

Goodwitch was silent, and patient.

"... And?"

"And they're... They're good!" Nora sobbed. "Maybe... Maybe better than Renny's pancakes! I thought it was impossible, but... But no!" She cried. "I feel so terrible! Am I betraying Renny?! Should I explore my new feelings with Jaune-Jaune?! What do I do?!"

As ridiculous as it all sounded, Professor Goodwitch had been around the block. And it was clear Nora was in real distress. So she sucked in a breath and focused on why she had become an educator.

Not easy to do when your Semblance made you primarily a janitor for a bunch of super-powered teenagers.

"I suggest you talk with Jaune-Mister Arc and Mister Ren, and be as open and honest with your feelings as possible," Glynda said, "Air out things and resolve them. After all, keeping these things contained might build resentment and confusion: Those can be deadly to a team's cohesion, which can be fatal."

Nora nodded fervently, her eyes alight.

"I-I will, Professor! Thank you! That really helps!"

Goodwitch allowed a small but encouraging smile to show on her face. This was what made it all worth it. The joy of helping these children grow into good people. It gave her a warm, happy feeling in her heart.

"Thank you, Miss Valkyrie, I'm glad I could help."

"You must have a wonderful marriage if you're so knowledgeable about these things!"

Goodwitch narrowed her eyes.

"I'm single."

Nora blinked, looking... Disappointed and almost pitying?

"Oh... Well... It's still good advice!" A beat. "Probably!"

The warm, happy feeling was gone.
 
Goodwitch Needs a Drink 2
The next day, Goodwitch had another visitor in her office. One Jaune Arc, who looked apologetic from the moment he stepped in. Then again, he looked like that every time she saw him.

"Mister Arc," she 'greeted', peering over her glasses at him. "You need something?"

"Uh, yes," he said, standing in front of her desk like a naughty elementary school boy. He cleared his throat and then looked serious. It was a face she had seen on him rarely, but it was welcome. Every time he made it, it gave Glynda hope that he would grow out of his deficiencies and become a proper Huntsman.

"Thank you for speaking with Nora," he said, "I had no idea what she was going through, but we talked out the issue thanks to your advice and things are much better."

Glynda became less tense and nodded.

"That's good to hear," she said. "The team leader cannot know everything going on in his team, and sometimes an outside perspective is needed to put things right."

"Yes," Jaune said with a small smile, "She and Ren are going to try dating. I'm happy for them." He smiled warmly. "I know I'm... I'm struggling a lot in class, Miss Goodwitch, but I... I appreciate everything you do for me and my friends. It's not easy, I know, but you do it because you want us to not die. And I thank you."

Again, Goodwitch felt a warm, happy feeling in her chest. She favored Jaune with a small smile, a rarity to be sure.

"Thank you, Mister Arc," she said softly, "I would do it for any student who asked."

Jaune nodded.

"Also... I want you to know? If I wasn't your student and you weren't my teacher, I would absolutely date you."

Glynda blinked.

"I-What?"

"Nora told me you were feeling really down about being single," Jaune explained, "And I wanted you to know, you're super attractive! Not just physically, but as a person too!"

Her cheeks went red.

"Mister Arc-"

Jaune nodded fervently.

"Oh yeah! I'd do everything in my power to make you happy because you deserve it!" He went on, "I'd ask you to marry me! I'd be the best husband ever! And we'd have twelve kids! I know you'd be a great mom! Like, the greatest! And-!"

Goodwitch cleared her throat.

"That-That will be quite enough, Mister Arc! Thank you!" She said.

Jaune nodded, flushing a bit himself.

"Ah, uh, yeah... Kind of got carried away... I-I'm not hitting on you! Just want that to be clear! Not trying to ruin your reputation-And uh, yeah I think you're super hot and a great person but I would never-! I-I mean, not unless you wanted to-Why would you, right? You've got like dozens of men after you, probably, and I'm just-!"

"Thank you, Mister Arc!" Goodwitch said, face quite red. She waved her riding crop, and Jaune flew out the door.

"Sorry!" He shouted back.

Goodwitch grumbled to herself, summoning some tea to calm her nerves.

"Stupid, brash, feckless boy," she muttered. She sighed.

"Why can't more men be that direct...?"

Well... Maybe he'd still be interested after graduation?

Glynda rapidly shook her head.

"No! No! NO! I am not that desperate!" She hissed.

She was, indeed, that desperate.
 
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The Dense Dragonslayer
- - -

Yang found Jaune outside on the roof, staring out at the sun setting behind the mountains. She sat down next to him, in silence. He glanced up at her, then returned his gaze back to the mountains. He sighed.

"So... How mad was she this time?" He asked.

"Pretty damn mad," Yang said softly. "It was funny at first, but... Damn." She shook her head. "Are you a glutton for punishment or what?"

Jaune's eyes focused on the horizon.

"No."

"So... Why do you keep doing all this?" Yang asked, huffing a little. Jaune shrugged.

"It's... Safer," he said.

Yang blinked, and raised an eyebrow.

"Safer how?"

"Striking out against someone you have no chance against isn't as bad as striking out against someone you think you might have a chance with," he explained. He looked over at Yang and shrugged.

"I mean, Weiss is genuinely beautiful. Talented. Smart. But... Me? I'm just some no-name farmboy. Her family is the richest in Remnant. Mine? Thought I was a failure from the moment I was born."

"G-Geez, Jaune," Yang murmured. She reached out and rested a hand on his shoulder. "They... They're that bad?"

Jaune snorted.

"Every time I talked about my dream... They just told me 'that's cute, sweetie! But don't worry, we'll protect you!' As I got older? They outright told me I had no chance, and would die if I did it."

"I mean... You're here, right?" Yang asked softly. "You're struggling, but you're here, dude. Is that why you keep going after Weiss? Just... Just to prove them wrong?"

"Sort of?" Jaune said, shrugging, "The other part is... She just looked so lonely. And well... If I can make her feel better, then, hey. At least I did something."

"Jeez, Jaune," Yang murmured, "The hell did your family do to you?"

Jaune shook his head.

"They're not the problem. I am," he said softly. Yang ground her teeth. Normally, she would have just backed off and enjoyed the soap opera, but this? This was too much. She had to do something. And hey, Pyrrha would owe her.

She punched his shoulder, hard. He yelped.

"OW! What the hell was that for-?!"

"Weiss hates having to shoot you down!" Yang growled. "She hates having to look like a bitch! Maybe you have good intentions, Jaune, but you're going about it all wrong! If you're not into her, then shoot for someone you are!"

"But... But what if... I mean..." Jaune stuttered. Yang sighed heavily.

"Look. There are girls here who are genuinely into you," she stated firmly, "Girls who are just waiting for you to show any interest! Who do care about you, despite how much of a dork you can be! Hell, to some, that's a bonus!" She looked him right in the eyes.

"All you have to do," she stated, "Is be honest. Honest with yourself, and honest with them! I know you've got plenty of issues with your family-Hell, I can relate! But... Those issues aren't always true! You are not a miserable failure! You're working to realize your dream, and girls CAN care about you! It doesn't have to be love at first sight, either! If you give them a chance... If you give yourself a chance... You two might work out, and find love that way!"

It was something her dad had told her. She'd never really put it into practice, given she had to look after Ruby, but... It sounded right.

Jaune's eyes widened. A spark of comprehension ignited in his eyes as he gaped at her.

"You mean... Someone who's always been there?" Jaune asked. Yang sighed and nodded hard.

"Yes!"

"Someone who I can relate to?"

"Yes!"

"Someone I... I share a lot in common with?"

"YES!" Yang stated, glaring at him. Jaune nodded.

"And... Just push my fear aside, and-and go for it?" He pressed. Yang grinned, nodding furiously.

"Yes! Finally! Finally you're getting it!"

Now, all he had to do was go off, confess to Pyrrha, and everything would-

He leaned in and pressed his lips to hers. The contact was like a live wire, and she felt warm inside and out. It wasn't like she was a stranger to kisses, she wasn't a total virgin, but Jaune's lips seemed to just convey a warmth that hit her right in her brain.

What the...?

He pulled back, his cheeks bright red. He panted, and smiled widely.

"Sorry," he said, "Sorry I was so stupid... So blind..."

"Uhwah...?" Yang managed. Jaune rested a hand on her shoulder.

"So... Uh... Do you want to go to the dance together?" He asked softly. "Unless you already have a date?"

"I... Uh..." She found herself nodding in a daze. His grin made her tingle.

"Great! See you then," he said. He squeezed her shoulder, stood up, and headed off. It wasn't until he closed the door behind him that Yang's brain kicked back into gear.

"Wait, what?!"

- - -
 
The Dense Dragonslayer 2
I need more of this, and Weiss getting jealous of Yang & Jaune.

Weiss nothing, what about Pyrrha's reaction?

Yang: "Uh, hey P-Money. Sooo... Good news and bad news!"

Pyrrha: "Yes Yang?"

Yang: "Good news, Jauney Boy is no longer into Weiss-cream!"

Pyrrha: gasps, beams like the sun "You mean it?!"

Yang: "Y-Yeah! He was doing it for some kind of weird psychological issue thanks to his shitty family but he's over it-"

Pyrrha hugs Yang tightly.

Pyrrha: "THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!"

Yang: "Y-Yeah! Yeah, heh, no problem!"

Pyrrha: "And... And what's the bad news?"

Yang: "... Well... Uhhh... He thinks I'm in love with him."

Pyrrha: "..."

Yang: "And he asked me out to the dance."

Pyrrha: "....."

Yang: "And uh... I accidentally said yes?"

Pyrrha: "WHAT."

Yang: winces as Pyrrha tightens her hold, gasps "P-P-Money... Can't breathe... I can fix this... Can't if I'm dead...!"
 
The Messiah
Goodwitch: "Ozpin... I really have to know... What are all these plans you've asked me to edit?"

Ozpin: "... Shiiiiit..."

Goodwitch: "Ozpin, have you done something bad, again?!"

Ozpin: "Um... No! Not bad at all!"

Goodwitch: "Then why does it have lists of names, traits, and genealogies going back thousands of years?"

Ozpin: "Ah... Well... Ahem... You see Glynda, for thousands of years, my agents and I have worked on a breeding program. Crossing bloodlines in the hopes of creating... The One."

Goodwitch: "The One?"

Ozpin: "The emphasis probably helps, yes. At the same time, we also set up a series of prophecies and sought to figure out how to fulfill them. In order to unite all of mankind around a single savior."

Goodwitch: "... Okay, I mean... I suppose in principle that's... A good thing? Sort of? Though on the face of it, it sounds REALLY evil."

Ozpin: "It's to save mankind, not to control it, Glynda. Calm down."

Goodwitch: "When is it supposed to be fulfilled?"

Ozpin: "Hopefully very soon. Indeed, our Savior should be joining the school this year."

Goodwitch: "Who is it? Not Ruby Rose!"

Ozpin: "Ha! Ruby Rose indeed! No, not her Glynda. She's too flighty, too independent, not as easily molded."

Goodwitch: "You're sounding evil again, Ozpin."

Ozpin: "No, no... The Savior instead is someone who can be shaped, forged, made strong. Starting from weakness so he appreciates strength, and has compassion. No, our Savior is..."

Cut to Jaune Arc, stuck in a locker. Ruby knocks on the outside.

Ruby: "Jaune? You okay? Did Cardin bully you again?"

Jaune: "No, no... I just forgot to tie my shoelace."

Ruby: giggles "Again?"

Jaune: "Yes, again."

Cut back to Ozpin's office.


Goodwitch: "... We're in a lot of trouble, aren't we?"

- - -

Yes I saw Dune and Dune 2, yes I have read the books, and I also love "Life of Brian". So it's not exactly an idea for a Jaune Sue. More an idea of Ozpin and his agents having to make Jaune LOOK like the Messiah to unite all of humanity.

As Goodwitch says, we're in a lot of trouble.
 
The Messiah 2
Ozpin: "Miss Nikos, it's so good to see you. We need you for an important mission."

Pyrrha: "Yes Headmaster."

Ozpin: "It concerns Mister Arc."

Pyrrha: concerned "Is... Is something wrong with Jaune? Is he all right?"

Ozpin: "Well... He will face a great destiny. Have you read the prophecy of Verdant?"

Pyrrha: "'He shall come weak and ignorant, but once his Aura is unlocked, he will know your ways as though born to them?'"

Ozpin: nods "You know your ancient prophecies."

Pyrrha: "Wait... That is speaking of... The One."

Ozpin: low voice "See Glynda? She puts the emphasis on the right word, too."

Glynda: rolls her eyes

Ozpin: "Suffice it to say... What else do you know of The One?"

Pyrrha: "... 'He shall be the eighth son of an eighth son'... 'He will be a knight on foot, seeking a mare'... 'He will see the Silver Eyes as his friend'..." Her eyes widen "You don't mean...?!"

Ozpin: "It is possible, Miss Nikos, that Mister Arc could be... The One. We do not know for sure, but it is a possibility. Until then, I must ask you to help him, even protect him."

Pyrrha: eyes light up "Really?!"

Ozpin: "Within reason-"

Pyrrha: "Headmaster, if it involves the Savior of Remnant? I will do anything."

Goodwitch: "Miss Nikos! I will not have you become a martyr for Mister Arc!"

Pyrrha: "What?! Oh no, nonono! I'm not-That's not my intention! But uh... Won't he require a bodyguard AND a concubine?"

Ozpin: "... Yes he will!"

Goodwitch: "Ozpin!"

Ozpin: "What? Who am I to deny Miss Nikos her desires?"

Later...

Jaune: "Uh, Pyrrha? Why are you in my bed?"

Pyrrha: "Oh, I'm just keeping an eye on you, Jaune~! Plus this will help your muscles recover after our intense workout~!"

Jaune: "Well, if you're sure Pyrrha. I trust you completely."

Pyrrha: "Don't worry Jaune. I'll do anything for you. Absolutely anything."

Jaune: "... Riiiiiight..."

Pyrrha: "Now, why don't we remove our clothes for maximum skin coverage-?"

Jaune: high pitched "I think I'll keep my clothes on!"

Pyrrha: "As you wish, my beloved One."

Jaune: "Weird word emphasis but okay..."
 
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