[RWBY] RWBY Shorts

[SharkCultist]

Fun and stupid idea.

Beacon learns that Velvet is a wild drunk. A wild and racist drunk.

*Velvet kicks in the cafeteria doors*

Velvet: Cardin Winchester you hairless chimp where the fuck are you?

Cardin: who you calling a chimp flopsy?

*Velvet shoots across the cafeteria with a rabbit jump and grabs him by the nuts*

Velvet: listen here you ginger chucklefuck you've been pulling my ears for two months.

Cardin: and you want me to stop?

Velvet: I want you to stop blue balling me you mistake.

Cardin: mistake?

Velvet: well you have aura so you've got a soul. Which you shouldn't since you're a ginger.

Cardin: that's racist.

Velvet: thanks for noticing. Now. Here's what's going to happen. You're going to take me on a date, and for your sake I hope it's good, and afterwards you're going to tell your team to fuck off for the weekend so we can use your room.

Cardin: and if I object?

*Velvet squeezes slightly*

Velvet: Don't.

Cardin: noted.

Velvet: good. I'm going to throw up on your shoes and pass out now.

*Proceeds to do just that*

 

[AndrewJTalon]

I dunno where this came from. I think it's from watching a lot of Westerns. But here is some badly needed badass and pathos for Qrow. Imagine him talking to his nieces when they're almost to Volume 1 about the reality of Hunting Grimm.

"You walk into town, a stranger. The people there look to you, fear and hope in their eyes. And the weight of what they face lies upon you. These people are trying to reclaim the world that the Grimm took from us, bring light to the shadow. Out of desperation, greed, idiocy, hope, religious fervor-They come out of the cities to scrape away at the darkness that surrounds us, make a little candle in the night. And you are supposed to keep that candle lit, no matter the storm blowing, trying to snuff it out."

"A Huntsman can be seen as a messenger of God, an angel. Or a demon from the cold hell, appearing like salvation but dragging everyone down into damnation. A supernatural quality is assigned to the man or woman with the gun and the Aura unlocked, striding into town. And I don't believe I am an angel or devil. All I do is what I can to keep that candle lit. To chase out the darkness. But if there is a God, then I hope I will be doing His work. I hope His power is my power, I hope His justice is my justice. Because in the end there will be times where you're the only chance that little candle has of not going out. Never forget that."

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Ruby Rose sat on the bus, blindfolded, her arms crossed over her chest. She had been pouting through it from the moment Jaune had asked her to go with him and put it on.

"Are we there yet?" Ruby asked.

"Almost," Jaune said reassuringly, squeezing her hand. Ruby sighed heavily.

"I mean, I'm glad you're taking me out somewhere. Especially given your fiances," Ruby grumbled.

"Fake fiances," Jaune sighed. Ruby scowled.

"Don't seem so fake to me," she grumbled. Jaune sighed. The bus finally came to a stop, and Jaune took her hand.

"I know, I know, "Jaune said, "It's a big mess. I don't know why everyone's gone crazy."

"UGH!" Ruby huffed, stomping her foot even as they went down the steps, "You're so unfair, you know?"

"Unfair?" Jaune asked, confused. Ruby huffed as they stood on a street, the sounds of traffic and pedestrian traffic filling her ears.

"Yeah! You-You stupid super Aura badass family line harem having jerk! I'm your best friend and you just keep doing all this stupid junk! Even Granny paid more attention to Yang over me cause you're engaged! So whatever you're doing to win me back had better be super, super good-!"

Jaune pulled her blindfold off. Ruby stared at the large sign before her.

FORT CELLIWIG: VALEAN DEFENSE FORCE BASE

Underneath this was:

WELCOMES THE ARMAMENT EXPOSITION OF REMNANT

Ruby looked over: The gates to the base were open, the guards checking a wave of people of all shapes and sizes walking in. Kids laughing happily with their parents, soldiers, teenagers… And beyond the gates, the base. Full of military aircraft, vehicles, and stands full of weapons.

Ruby slowly turned back to Jaune. He smiled and handed over a ticket badge. He held up his own.

"Full weekend passes," Jaune said with a grin. Ruby gaped, slowly taking the badge into her trembling hands. "Just us together. What do you say, Crater Face?"

Ruby sucked in a deep breath… And then squealed.

"HEEEEE! JAUNE!" She hugged him tightly, her arms tight around his neck. "I LOVE YOU!"

"URK! Heh… I love you too, Ruby," Jaune said, hugging her back happily. "Let's go!"

And that's the preview. There will be another Arc family member too. But the sisters are the main focus.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Another idea I had was a twist on Jaune becoming a superhero, based on Marvel. Because there's one Marvel hero Jaune really should be.

After he gets bit and gets his powers, Jaune goes into Vale with his sister Orchid and dad Nick. He shows off on a TV show to get money that he plans to use to get into Beacon, while his dad is on an errand and Orchid is buying a video game. The producer shorts him because his powers aren't really THAT impressive, so Jaune, in a moment of spite, lets a thief run out with the money from the show.

... Who then kills Orchid, by accident, while trying to steal the Arc family truck.

Jaune goes after the guy. He gets to him before Nick does.

Sees his face... Staggers back. It's the thief he let go. It's all Jaune's fault.

The murderer falls out a window and dies, right in front of Nick who had been about to storm the building.

Nick: snarl "I've been denied everything... Even my revenge..."

Nick goes into the building and finds Jaune. He assumes the guy took Jaune hostage, but Jaune says he tracked him down. So Nick agrees that Jaune should train to be a Huntsman, after some therapy.

Isabel isn't happy. And Jaune... Is even less happy. He's got his dream and it got his little sister killed. It's all his fault.

But he resolves to do his best to make sure he NEVER makes a mistake like that again, and to use his power responsibly to save others.

As the Amazing Spider-Man.

 

[CountvonBarnOwl]

Ruby Reacts to (not quite) Cursed Guns of Helldivers;
A Ruby Reacts to Cursed Guns - Whitley-borg AU Side-story anthology
Chapter 1.0001 - GATE Gala and Setting the Stage.

GATE Gala, Standing for Garments, Arms, Technology, and Equipment. The acronym had changed once again, but this time it had fortunately become more truncated. It was originally a convention to show off all of the latest developments in weaponry, for companies to attract prospective buyers. Such as Huntsmen, Huntresses, the armed forces of Atlas, the militias, paramilitaries and self-defense forces that kept the Grimm out of every town when a Hunter wasn't immediately on hand, and everybody who realized that a weapon was necessary to survive on a (to hear the Church of the Two Brothers tell it) Gods-forsaken world. Then, some tech companies got involved, eager to show off their latest not-strictly-weapons gear. And with that crowd of well-budgeted clientele, other companies and dealers soon got in on the action. The camping and travel industry, clothing and textiles, and so on. The prior iteration of the acronym had included the letters G,S,A,V,C,T,U,O, and B, but since coming up with new words was getting cumbersome the committee had cut things down to size.

The GATE Gala fell in Vale this year, and right before the Vytal Festival. Which, while any advertising effort would be overshadowed, six blocks roped off near a skydock and an MM terminal at the northwest fringe of the commercial district, where all the casinos are, was bound to draw the attention of the crowd that had already formed before and after the fights.

The armed forces of Atlas had their own set of exhibits, booths, and stands to show off all of the gadgets and goodies that they were set to procure, or had developed (at least partly) in-house. The AK-200 had made enough of an impression in the Breach, but the P-290 had been absent. Plus it would allow General Ironwood to try and salvage the reputation of the Atlesian army after the PR nightmare that had been the announcement of the SDC's Cute Goths and Cursed Guns Clearance Event, in which the head of the SDC Marketing Department had, in collaboration with a charming, intelligent, gothic beauty of a Huntress-aspirant who shared his interests in cartridge wildcatting and weapons design, put together a marketing campaign for the SDC. And, as it had happened, that marketing campaign turned the highest strata of Atlesian society, military, politics, and all, into the loudest, wettest fart of a punchline that Remnant had ever seen.

Which was why Warrant Officer Whitley Schnee, incidentally the head of both the SDC's Accounting and Marketing Departments, was stuck managing the series of tents reserved for the Atlas Army, and all of the cheap plastic folding tables therein, where were displayed current, prospective, and candidate weapon systems anticipated to enter service in the next year, sat at one of the aforesaid tables with an even cheaper, and yet more plastic smile stretched across his face as he scanned the throng of convention-goers. Literally, any object he focused on had its estimated size, speed, bearing, and range displayed across the top and right side of his peripheral vision.

Here he waited to treat with any curious convention goers, intent on sending them away with order forms and possibly a recruiting brochure.

But Whitley's thoughts were elsewhere, mostly centered on the silver eyes and thick thighs of a lovely Huntress as she danced across the moonlit interior of his mind, hoping to once again run into Ruby Rose as the very enthusiastic goth girl skipped and flew across the convention, firing off factoids, questions, and speculations like a CIWS.

Wait.

That wasn't a mere mental image he went in and digitally edited.

In the crowd Whitley could see a textured, angular bob cut, black and full with red ends that bounced with every step above the brilliant red of a rosenrot mantle so vibrant that it looked solemn against the dull world around it. Before he knew it, he had jumped over the display table, with the thud of his boots betraying the weight of his small frame as they hit the ground. 'I'm not abandoning my post to frolic with a woman, sir' he thought to himself as he rose, 'I'm merely engaging with an intelligent, and very attractive convention-goer and enticing her to our display.' He thought as he began to move. 'Besides, between pinging my skull sonar and sharing data with the security cameras, it isn't like I won't be able to catch anyone trying anything.' He justified himself as he began to jog.

"Ruby!" He called as he waved.

"Whitley?" she replied in her melodious natural soprano as she turned towards him. And while he was not of any religious persuasion, looking at her head-on, Whitley understood why the church of the Two Brothers always depicted the Elder - the greater of the two, and the patron of life - with Silver Eyes.

"WHITLEY!" echoed one of Remnant's foremost pop stars, ironically flattening the melody that the woman next to her had spun unto ruin.

"What are you doing here?" They both asked.

Whitley looked Ruby square in the eyes. "My CO wants me to help him run the Army's exhibit. To help, 'restore their reputation' after our little video together turned both public and private procurement in Atlas into a laughing stock." Ruby giggled, and Whitley took a moment to admire her.

"That still doesn't explain why you're wearing that uniform," there was, if Whitley had to guess, shock, no, surprise, that was more accurate. And distress in Weiss' voice. Why, he couldn't say. "Father didn't want to pay for my prosthesis," he answered in an even tone. "What?" "What?" "What?" Weiss responded first, then the dark-haired woman who was obviously Blake Belladonna wearing a bow, and then Ruby and the woman who must have been her older sister spoke at the same time. The former knew he was a cyborg, but he had not fully disclosed the circumstances surrounding his conversion.

"Prosthesis?" The daughter that Jacques Schnee hadn't disowned yet still sounded shocked. And for some reason, it looked like the veins in her neck were throbbing at a heightened tempo, in a pattern almost identical to the one displayed by Colonel Schnee when she found out whose brain was housed in the ICE Dragon frame. Odd. Weiss had no reason not to know who he was, and therefore no reason to be surprised. Hopefully this was not evidence of something hereditary.

"Correct. He tried to pass the loss onto the portion of the Army budget dedicated to cybernetics for wounded soldiers by threatening the Dust supply. General Ironwood did not like that. But he took pity on me, so I got all of the robot bits, but I only get to keep them pending two tours of duty and helping with the Advanced Projects Research Army Division's advanced projects and research. So who wants to see the procurement candidacy exhibit?" Whitley asked with a high note of forced enthusiasm.

"I DO, I DO, I DO!" Ruby started jumping up and down with some very real enthusiasm of her own.

"Wonderful," Whitley's didn't have to force it at all, as he turned around and started walking back toward the stands.

"Ooooo, it sounds like Weisscream's brother has a crush on you, Ruby."

"NO HE DOESN'T!" Weiss yelled back.

"She's charming, intelligent, attractive, and capable," Whitley interjected without missing a beat, "Why shouldn't I have a crush on her?"

He would just assume that the girl now hiding under her hood had only been picking her nose a few seconds ago because it would get on Weiss' nerves.

Whitley beckoned Team RWBY to a table with a very simple pistol. A VERY simple pistol. A single shot, break-action pistol, in fact. Hardly more complex than a muzzleloader. There was just one thing.

Spoiler: The Pistol In Question

The barrel was forty millimeters wide.

"This is the GP-31." Whitley explained, "Fires a 40 mil grenade at a hundred meters a second. It features high-vis iron sights, along with a mounting rail if you have other preferences," he tapped the frame of the red dot sight not quite at the back end of the rail. "Safety features; a primary selector on the upper receiver that you can switch between safe and fire. Fire being the position with the little bullet carving, and it is ambidextrous, so it can be accessed from a natural position, no matter which hand you hold it with. There is a secondary grip safety. And to reload, you press here, pull the barrel out, turn to eject the spent shell, load, reverse, and you're ready to fire again." He said as he went through the steps and mimicked loading in a grenade.

Ruby leaned across the table and whispered, "My birthday is on Halloween, in case you're wondering."

"Message received, and understood." Whitley replied.

"Boo." Yang mock-shouted while shaking her downward turned thumb. "Show her something fucked up again commercial man."

"Damn it Yang." Ruby muttered, "fine, let's fucking get this over with," she rolled her eyes. "What is the most fucked up gun you have on display here today."

Whitley paused, "I actually have to think about that," he muttered. That did not inspire confidence.

Ruby Rose was a sophisticated woman, possessing elevated tastes and refined sensibilities. Therefore, a gun would have to be chosen that offended both on the aesthetic and engineering levels. Something that combined absurdity of form with inconvenience of function. Nevertheless, it should be a good weapon, functionally, in most areas. A weapon that could not, on the merits, be called bad. But designed in such a way that it should be easy to misunderstand and misuse.

And with each criteria Whitley filtered through, he was led, intractably, to a single weapon.

"Whitley, what's wrong?" Ruby asked, concerned by the way his face shifted into both a grimace and a glower together.

"Just promise you won't hate me for this," he replied with exhaustion, before leading them on to one of the tables with a white/grey cloth draped over it with a red border The trifecta with the stylized odachi running through it on the top right corner marking the exhibit as belonging to the Stark Arms conglomerate.

"No problem," Ruby said, "no matter how mad I get I promise I won't hate you over it. After all, how bad could it beeee..." Ruby's voice trailed off into nothingness as Whitley pulled back the cloth

"Famous last words." Blake Belladonna noted.

"This," Whitley explained, is the Stark Arms SkA-52 urban warfare carbine,"

Spoiler: The most cursed primary in Helldivers, and it is a crossover

"Behold it's helical feed magazine, a staple of the past two generations of Stark design. It is offered in chamberings of both 5.5 mil with a 56 shot magazine, and an 8.6 mil with a 40 shot magazine. To release the magazine, you just press the button on the back of the cheek riser and flip it up like so." The orange barrel of a magazine dropped to the table. "You slot the new one in on the back," he continued, putting the magazine back. "Close it down, pull the charging handle, and you're back in business." We've got a select fire switch with single, five shot burst, or full auto with a cyclic rate of 790 rpm. It comes with an integrated carry handle with iron sights with replacement mounts for a red dot, a scope, or a hybrid optic. The muzzle has a built-in break and option for a suppressor, and a modular under-barrel mount with options for a forty millimeter grenade launcher, shotgun, or flashlight."

"That all sounds really impressive when put together like that." the presumed heiress of the SDC surmised as Whitley se the gun back down on the table and draped the cloth back over it.

"And it was designed by a Faunus," the princess of Menagerie incognito noted. Which was true. General Stark liked girls with wolf ears. Which meant a lot of wolf-Faunus maid-concubines. With his death at the end of the Great War, his human descendants had to grapple with the sons and daughters from all of the new and lupine branches on the family tree, the four that could inherit legally anyway. One intrafamily internecine power struggle later, and the new patriarch of the family, Schatten Stark, rebuilt the family fortune by sinking his teeth and claws as deep into the arms, technology, and shipping industries as he could. However the Stark name was forever tarnished. First by General Alexander's defeat at the hands of the Last King of Vale, and second by the shadow war fought between Schatten Stark and all of his half-siblings. The name that had meant an unbroken record of honor, as old as man's first steps on Solitas, was dead. And Schatten Stark was also dead, leaving his oldest daughter, Siarka, the head engineer, chief designer, and now, owner, CEO, and Chairwoman of Stark Arms to resurrect it.

Of course, Whitley made note of exactly where Blake Belladonna's interest in the platform started and stopped, before he moved on.

"How much?" Yang asked. "When they hit convention shelves in a couple of days, asking price is set to be 72,900 Lien for a model with adjustable feed, as well as a swappable barrel and chamber. Suppressor and optics, as well as under-barrel attachments sold separately. " Whitley explained.

"Good, I'll take-" Yang was interrupted by a crack of skin on skin that sounded almost like a pistol going off inside of the tent.

"No. You. FUCKING! Won't." Ruby, who had been ramrod straight and stiff as a board since Whitley had unveiled the gun, said as she massaged her palm, that had somehow ended up redder than Yang's cheek.

"Why not?!" Yang fired back, her eyes flickering red. "You're the one who is always telling me that I need another ranged weapon, and this thing seems pretty top-shelf with all of its attachments. It even has another shotgun. A forty millimeter shotgun, that's almost double Ember Cecilia's bore diameter."

"I'll fucking tell you why Yang." Ruby bit back in a tone mirroring her sister's. "I get the decision not to include a trigger guard. You need to wear big heavy gloves in Solitas, and you need to fit your finger around the trigger. That is okay. What is absolutely not okay is a 56 shot magazine with a FIVE shot burst. Five does not go into fifty six evenly. What you have there is a gun that in 8.6, has eight bursts, so far so good, or in 5.5, has eleven-point-two. They both divide evenly by eight, and I get that. But then what is the point of not making the burst two, or if you really, really, needed to above three, four shots. Those numbers multiply evenly into eight. Why not those?"

"And then there's the height over bore. You could have had the iron sights mounted into the carry handle, but no. That makes too much sense. Instead let's stick the charging handle on top of the chamber, mount that into the back of the carry handle, and put the iron sights on top of that. WHICH YOU DO NOT NEED TO DO, BECAUSE THERE'S ANOTHER CHARGING HANDLE ON THE BOLT EDIFICE ITSELF, RIGHT BEHIND THE FUCKING SELECTOR SWITCH." Ruby's gesticulations were picking up in pace and scope. She went from flailing her arms to curling up on herself to flailing again as she paced back and forth between her teammates.

"And the bottom is hardly any fucking better." Ruby seethed more and more, "The GL, I get. The shotgun, I kind of get. BUT A FORTY MILLIMETER FLASHLIGHT?!?!?!?! You have a FUCKING PIC RAIL ON THE FUCKING SIDE OF THE FUCKING GUN! Why not mount a normal size flashlight on one side, and a laser on the Other? Huh? ANSWER ME!"

Whitley's expected joy at getting a face full of Ruby was mixed with an equal measure of fear.

"Well, you're right about the flashlight," Ruby let out a confident "hmph," as he conceded the point and a step back. "But I know that they're investigating the viability of installing a laser integrated into the optic."

Ruby blinked, twice, "that's actually really nifty. And very considerate in light of how fucking hard it is going to be to zero this fucking thing. GGGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! This gun is so fucking cursed but it is also so functional. I definitely wouldn't mind seeing a lot of the avenues that this platform explores developed on further... FUCK! This gun keeps giving me reasons not to hate it, no matter how much I should. It doesn't feel right. I feel icky inside, I'm gonna need a shower after this..."

"In and out Ruby, in and out. Just breathe in... and out." Yang said as she walked her sister who had gone from flailing, to thrashing, to stomping, to rolling around on the ground.

Ruby composed herself and she got up. "Because... haaa... hhaaa... I cannot forgive... the whole back end of that fucking gun." She composed herself. "The whole fucking cheek riser hinges up in order to release the magazine. Wear and tear is going to compound on every reload, and there goes your accuracy, I do not care that this gun was designed for sub-200 meter firefights. Because the second you re-shoulder the gun, and look down the sights, what is the most prominent feature of the gun that you can see? Huh? TELL ME! WHAT IS IT?!?!"

"The exposed recoil spring?" Whitley answered.

"THE EXPOSED RECOIL SPRING!" Ruby yelled back in his face. "How the fuck does this gun even cycle in anything less than perfect weather???"

"I do not know, but I have seen them fire just fine in blizzard conditions." Whitley answered, silently thankful for his audio-receptor system's volume editing function.

"You're lucky I think you're cute." Ruby muttered, before clamping both hands around her mouth and flushing the color of her cloak.

"Oooo, looks like little Ruby is finally starting to show interest in boys." Yang leaned on her sister.

Blake Belladonna appeared to jot something in a notebook before departing from the tent.

"Yaaang..." Ruby groaned.

"You can't just like him, you dolt!" Weiss shouted in a mixture of shock and disgust. And Whitley resolved to double his efforts of courtship.

"What if I showed her some nicer guns. Could she like me then?" Whitley asked.

"I need to see some nicer guns after that." Ruby replied, while holding out her hand, and Weiss' face did the best impression it could of a computer's crash screen.

Whitley vaulted the table once again, "Then come this way, Miss Rose." He accepted her offered hand and led Team R__Y to another table (Weiss.exe had not yet rebooted). This one was dominated by a massive, shoulder-fired weapon.

Spoiler: The massive, shoulder-fired weapon

"It is a relatively simple design, drawn up and commissioned by a certain party that wants the armed forces to further economize. It is a reciprocating barrel, and toggle-lock action housed in a box that mounts the grips, optic, and the fixed magazine that gets fed via stripper clips. Chambered in 20x102mm, it can fire APHE-T, frag, or flak rounds. Other calibers and rounds are being studied, but nothing else produced satisfactory results in time for this year's convention. This thing had some problems in the initial testing phase, because it was originally intended to be an anti-material rifle, but people soon discovered that you needed at least a 20-mil cartridge to operate a toggle spring this powerful on recoil alone." Whitley explained.

"It weighs nothing at all," Ruby said as she picked the weapon up and shouldered it, before looking it over. She had expected something in Crescent Rose's neighborhood, with this gun's caliber and size. But not so. It was, just by feeling estimation, somewhere between a fifth and a third of her son's weight.

"Indeed," Whitley commented. "So I don't recommend firing it on full auto unless you're being charged at close range by a Goliath or a very large Death Stalker. Unless there is also a Nevermore swooping down on you from overhead when you engage the other target. And also completely surrounded."

Ruby nodded, the weapon wasn't front-heavy. It wasn't heavy at all, but the weight of both the magazine and the firing mechanism were neatly aligned with her shoulder. So any sustained fire without training or considerable strength meant that the shots would be going all over the place. "This looks like a very viable platoon or company-level support weapon," she surmised. "It cannot do the work of a machine gun, or a rocket launcher. But it is a nice in-between, I imagine that this could enable a single person, without Aura, to go toe-to-toe with a beringal, or a geist that got into something large."


As always, Ruby's analysis was fast and comprehensive. Rockets existed, as did MGLs or AGLs, but the robust physiology and dynamism of the beringal, and the geist's capacity for concealment and maneuverability made their muzzle velocities a liability without the advantages of considerable range or surprise. But Ruby recognized instantly what kind of a battlefield game-changer this weapon would be. She also quickly identified the level of support it would need to be deployed alongside to be viable. A calculation that matched Whitley's own.

Then Ruby's stomach growled. "Uh, which way to the food?" She asked.

"Concessions are one block down to your left and make a left turn. I think they let a few restaurants stay open on the upper floors of some other buildings near the far side of the convention if you feel like sitting for something more substantial though." Whitley responded.

"Thanks." Ruby replied back, "I... mean we... will be back later to check out more guns."

Whitley bade her farewell and the sisters departed, with Yang carrying the still-unresponsive W of their team under her arm like a wooden plank.

------

This one was a difficult beast. I basically scrapped everything I had after writing 1700 words because the characters weren't working with me. Then I started from scratch again after 1500 words because I didn't like the pacing. My main problem was that I wrote this with two different minds going in two different directions. I wanted to introduce concepts, ideas, and even a few characters that you'll get to meet sooner or later. But I also wanted to write about Ruby and the guns of Helldivers. Now, since I was not explicitly requested to do the cursed guns of Helldivers, I had a bit of fun and gave Ruby a pair of nice guns for a change. And believe me, before and after the StA-52, she needed them. Because there is a real gun that works like the StA-52. Well. There is a real gun that has its bolt carrier group and feeding system set up in the same way that the StA-52 would need to be in order to work.

The gun that I am talking about is the Korobov TKB-022. German Korobov is a bit of a legend, and a contentious subject, over whether or not any of his guns actually qualify as being cursed. His first gun lost to Mikhail Kalashnikov's design in 1946, and I think he was submitting prototypes (almost all of which had exclusively Bakelite furniture) all the way through the 1980s. None of which were accepted, and just looking at a few of them, you would see why. But because the designs themselves were so innovative (the TKB-022 kind of being an FN F2000 built 40 years before the F2000) some hesitate to simply label his designs as cursed and be done with it. I said all of that to say that while I love the Killzone games, in order for the StA-52 to work, with what we are shown, it would basically have to be an upside-down TKB-022 that couldn't decide if it wanted to go as a G36, an M16, or a FAMAS for Halloween, and it does not help that as the Killzone series rolls on that barrel shroud looks more and more like it came from an MG-42. I had to write in all of the extra features as a way of translating in all of the ways that the StA-52 changes from one game to another, from damage to fire rate, to the silenced model with the five shot burst.

Of course, I didn't have it in me to give Ruby another cursed gun before or after the StA-52. So I gave her a utility pistol that I think she would like, and the gun that is essentially Russ Robinson's SR-9 Anti-Material Machine Rifle that has been up-gunned from .50 cal to 20 mil, and uses a toggle lock (like on the Luger) rather than the bike-chain sort of system that I think the Lahti and the Solothurn used.

I have a few more guns in Helldivers that I know are cursed, and a few that are cursed enough, and one that I am tentatively putting in the "cursed" box because it has this one singular design feature that turns its everything else into a liability and ham-strings it in its designated role. Jaune and Yang's Payday 2 themed adventure is going to incorporate that.

As for the whole cyborg-Whitley thing, I kind of wanted to do something with one of my stories that I haven't yet fleshed out, and this piece wouldn't manifest without it. So I feel, again, as I sometimes do, like I owe my readership an apology for making it all the way through to the end. I hope the characters came across as coherent, my little sideshows of lore didn't substantively derail the plot, and that my editing was as good as it has been recently, and that you all enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Editor von BarnOwl here. Caught and fixed mistakes. Could have sworn I saw one more, but I can always get it later.

Editor von Barnowl Note #2: Please forgive the esoteric dating system and the mammoth of a title block. The .0000 system is just to suggest relative time of all of the vignettes that I write have to each other in the series. I suggest Ruby's storyline is the only one that I expect to be linear and consistent for the time being.

 

[SharkCultist]

James: you have got to be hands down the worst undercover agent I have ever seen.

Qrow: well fuck you too.

James: look at your last fake identity you made! Bud Weiser father of two daughters Molly and Mary Jane.

Qrow: I'm a great agent!

James: how hasn't your identity been leaked yet? There is absolutely no conceivable way you haven't been discovered infiltrating places with these piss poor disguises.

Qrow: you ever think maybe it's a act and I'm actually good at my job?

James: you got so drunk yesterday that during a bullhead flight into vale you confused your piss jug, why do you have that, with your flask.

Qrow: the jug makes it so I don't gotta stop on long trips. Anyway, I haven't been revealed on a job, so I gotta be good at my job right? Logic.

James: you can't even spell logic.

Qrow: sure I can, there's a K in there somewhere.

Glynda: oh for- listen. He sneaks in as a bird and everyone is too embarrassed that someone this incompetent snuck past them somehow. And logic with a K is a musician.

Qrow: hurtful.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Honestly, May teaching Ruby how to be a proper sniper could be fun. May being a badass sneaky assassin because she's so shy and quiet is something I really like. But Ruby doesn't really fight that way.

So Ruby sucks at being sneaky, and covert. She's got the math down just fine, of course, but to her, all the calculation required for shooting is a bit boring compared to the math that goes into Crescent Rose.

Ruby: "I mean... taking out Grimm at 1200 meters would be lame!"

May: looks indignant "It-It is not lame! I work very hard to shoot that good! Watch!"

She sets up her shot carefully, does the math...

Across campus... Professor Oobleck's coffee cup explodes in the middle of his lecture.

Oobleck: "... That was unexpected."

The class blinks. Oobleck calmly gets another mug, pours himself more coffee, and sips it.

Oobleck: "Now, where were we? Oh yes!"

Back with May and Ruby. Ruby stares at her.

May: blush "I-I'm sorry... I shouldn't have gotten mad... Oh no, I shot his coffee mug! What if it was his favorite-?!"

Ruby: gasp "That... WAS AMAZING!"

May: "R-Really?"

Ruby: "REALLY! TEACH ME!"

May: "Well, um... Okay!"

Ruby does eventually just stick with her fighting style, but trying to learn how to be sneaky is fun. And she does pick up a few things. Same way that May picks up a few things from Ruby when it comes to her fighting style.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

This is a commission I wrote.
- - -

Ilia slowly woke up from a painfilled, troubled sleep. She was sore, and felt the lingering effects of Aura transfer. She opened her eyes cautiously, and took in her surroundings.

She was in a hospital room, hooked up to medical sensors that projected her vitals. And a young blond human boy was sitting at her side, looking bored. He couldn't be any more than 15 years old, though he was tall for his age. He looked over and noticed her. He smiled.

"Hey! You're awake!" he said cheerfully. "How are you feeling? What do you remember?"

Ilia scowled.

"Where am I? What is this place?! Who are you?!"

"Oh, uh, this is Arc-En-Ciel Hospital, in Radian, Gallia, Vale," the boy said, "And I'm Jaune Arc! I'm just an intern nurse right now but I'm here to help! What can you tell me about what happened?"

The op had gone bad. They had been trying to steal a shipment of Dust from an SDC train. Something had gone wrong, there was an explosion… She scowled at the unassuming boy. It would be just like them to put an innocent looking kid in here to get her to lower her guard.

"I won't tell you anything," she hissed, "human!"

The boy sighed.

"Well… The chart says you got caught in a Dust explosion," Jaune said, "Suffered a concussion and a lot of burns. Can I check to see how you're doing?"

Ilia continued to glare, her skin turning red in anger. He smiled.

"I just want to make sure you're okay."

"My people will come for me," Ilia growled, "They'll get me out of here."

She tried to sit up… And immediately slumped back down, nauseous. The boy held up a sick bag and she vomited into it.

"Yeah, you're definitely still suffering from a concussion," the boy sighed. He took the sickbag and put it into a medical waste bin. He got her some water in a bottle with a straw sticking out of the top. "Here."

Ilia glared. Jaune shook his head.

"It's all right. It's just water."

Ilia was thirsty. Very much so. She couldn't exactly make her escape if she was weak. So she sipped the water, glaring all the time.

"Can you remember your name?" Jaune asked. "Where you were born?"

Ilia's skin flashed several different colors. His eyes widened. She scowled harder.

Here it comes, she thought, hatred and disgust and fear and-

"Wow! You're a chameleon Faunus? That's so cool!" Jaune gushed. Ilia stared, her spots turning red and pink.

"Wh-What?"

"That's so amazing!" Jaune continued, leaning forward eagerly. "That's really cool! Can you do all sorts of patterns and stuff?"

"I…" Ilia was taken aback. She'd… Never been asked that. Not once. Out of reflex, her skin color and patterns changed rapidly. Jaune beamed.

"That's incredible," he said. "And it proves you're healing well if you can do that! My mom's the best doctor around!"

"... I see," Ilia murmured. She looked over her skin: She remembered burns, so many burns all over her body… But she couldn't see a trace. Not even the hints of scar tissue.

A human… Did this for me…? Ilia wondered. Humans did this for me?

"So, what is your name? Do you remember it?" Jaune asked.

Ilia stared at him intensely. She took a breath.

"Yes… But I'm not sharing it," she said, "My friends will come for me."

Jaune shrugged.

"Okay. They'll just have to check you out at the front desk then," he said. "You wanna call them?"

He pointed to the phone by the hospital bed. Ilia sucked in a deep breath.

"... Sure."

It was risky, but she knew a burner Scroll to call in case of emergencies. Jaune stood up and walked out. Ilia scowled as he left.

One kind human… Two kind humans… What does it matter?

She made the call. She waited…

"What?" A cold voice demanded. Ilia felt some relief though-It was Adam.

"I need… I need someone to check me out-Get me out of here-"

"We assessed the possibility of doing that. It would take too many resources," Adam stated. A pit formed in Ilia's stomach.

"But-You can't just-I've worked so hard-!"

"You let yourself be taken by the humans," Adam scoffed, "Your weakness betrays you. Blake believes you are dead. That is far better than letting her think you betrayed us."

"I didn't betray you, I'm still loyal!" Ilia insisted.

"Then why would the humans treat you so well?" Adam demanded. "As I said, Blake believes you are dead. Stay that way. If you come back it will be in disgrace and death."

The line went dead. Ilia stared at the phone receiver. Tears began to fall from her eyes.

She heard Jaune enter again. She felt his arms go around her-Comforting and warm.

"Hey… Are you okay?" Jaune asked quietly, "What's wrong?"

"... Ilia," she sobbed.

"Huh?"

"That's… That's my name. Ilia," Ilia cried, pushing her face into his chest. Confused, Jaune hugged her tightly.

"Ilia… That's a pretty name… Did you… Did you reach anyone who could help?"

"... No," Ilia whispered. "Nobody… I-I'm… I'm all… Alone."

Jaune held her for a while. He shook his head.

"Not anymore, Ilia. I… I'll ask my parents to help. We'll get you a job, promise. And I'll be your friend. Forever."

Ilia sniffled.

"You promise?"

"Always," Jaune whispered.

- - -

Two Years Later…

Ruby Rose stepped off the airship, squinting a bit at the bright sunlight. She took in the expanse of Beacon Academy before her, grinning despite her nervousness. Sure, being abandoned by her sister was a bit terrifying but she… She could do this! She could-!

She bumped into someone, and Dust went off in an explosion. She slammed into the pavement, digging a crater out with her face.

"Owww…!"

"Careful, you idiot!"

Ruby looked up. A white haired girl in white clothing scowled down at her, getting her various containers of Dust organized. Ruby winced.

"I'm sorry-HEY! You shouldn't ship that much Dust anyway!"

"You shouldn't be clumsy, little girl!" The girl sniffed.

"Hey. Need help?"

Ruby looked to her right. She saw an armored hand reach out to her. She followed the hand up his arm to his face: A kind, warm face with blond hair and blue eyes. Ruby flushed and didn't know why as he helped her stand up.

"Everyone okay?" He asked.

"Um, y-yes," Ruby managed. "Just me, a normal girl with normal knees!"

Smooth, her mind sarcastically supplied.

"Cool," he said, "I'm Jaune Arc. You are?"

"Ruby Rose," Ruby said with a nervous smile. His smile remained warm and friendly.

Jaune looked over at the young woman in white.

"You could be more careful, you know," he gently admonished her. The white haired girl blushed and sniffed.

"She should be! I am a Dust Expert! The Dust Expert! Weiss Schnee, of the Schnee Family!"

"The same family that employs slave labor of Faunus in their Dust Mines?" A black haired girl with a large, prominent bow asked dryly, walking by while carrying several books. Weiss flushed angrily.

"That's-That's all in the past! We stopped doing that-!"

"Not according to the news," another girl stated. She was dressed in a hoodie which shadowed her face. She stepped up to Jaune's side and took his hand. They shared a warm, loving look, before the girl turned towards the Schnee girl. She scowled at Weiss too… Before she looked at the dark haired girl. Her eyes widened.

"Blake…?"

The dark haired girl gaped at her in shock.

"Ilia?!"

Blake drew her weapon, a ninjato machine pistol, and pointed it at Ilia. Ilia, in turn, pulled out a whip crackling with electricity and held it up threateningly.

Ruby, Weiss and Jaune looked between the two furious girls. Jaune coughed. Weiss winced. Ruby again displayed her amazing social skills.

"So… I take it you two have met?"

- - -

 

[AndrewJTalon]

I have also had some thoughts for Arslan. We don't really have a proper kuudere character in RWBY-Blake doesn't really count. So since Arslan has to control her emotions for her Semblance, let's make her our kuudere!

She wouldn't be to Rei Ayanami levels. She's more like if Starfire was in the body of Raven and had to keep her emotions under control at all times. And she's warm and kind to people. But her deadpan nature means she often assumes people understand what emotion she was trying to convey. She does have blindspots. But she also has a wicked sense of humor.

Arslan: "I cannot actually cause someone's heart to explode with my Aura techniques... But bandits don't know that and are often stupid. Well, not specifically. It's really hard to blow up someone's heart and I'd prefer not to do it. It's a hassle and if they surrender, they have a chance to redeem themselves."

And of course, she would tease Jaune.

Arslan: "Oh no. You have seen me nude, Jaune Arc."

Jaune: "AH! NO! I-I'm sorry-"

Arslan: "I can no longer be a bride. Will you take responsibility?"

Jaune: "WHAT?!"

Arslan: "... I am joking. Was that not clear?"

It could also explain why Pyrrha, who has terrible social skills, failed to pick up that Arslan wanted to be her friendly rival.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Beacon hosts a Soapbox Derby. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

Weiss : Ruby you can't put an engine on your car.

Ruby: Why not?!

Weiss: Because that makes it not a soapbox car, it's just a gocart! Also, you can't have a dynamic suspension system! The point is that it's supposed to be in budget!"

Ruby: "It is!"

Weiss: "You spent our budget on TIRES!"

Ruby: "WE NEED TIRES!"

Weiss: "NOT RACING CAR TIRES!"

Ruby: "Ugh, I suppose you want me to remove the rocket boosters too!"

Weiss: "YES!"

With Team SSSN...

Neptune: "GUYS! WE NEED TO GET THIS DONE! AM I THE ONLY ONE WHO CARES?!"

Scarlet: "Pretty much."

Sage: "Yeah."

Sun: "You won't let me touch anything."

Neptune: "YOU WRECKED IT BEFORE!"

Sun: "But you said you needed the frame assembled together!"

Neptune: "YOU DID IT UPSIDE-DOWN!"

Sun: "So? Can't you just pilot it upside down?"

Neptune: "NO! I WON'T LOOK COOL LIKE THAT!"

Team JNPR works as a well oiled machine... Though they have some hiccups.

Jaune: "We're not dropping grenades, Nora."

Nora: scoff "Well what am I even here for?!"

Team CMEN...

Mercury gets surprisingly into it.

Mercury: "My father had me enter a soapbox derby just so we could assassinate a guy. It was the only time he even acted like a good dad in my entire life. So we're gonna win this, not for him... But for me. ME!"

How does everyone else react to it? What do they build? And who wins the race?

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Jaune had returned to Radian. He had come to the crypt in Arcadia, the great stone fortress of the Arcs. It was after Vytal. They were planning to go after Cinder. He had come to the crypt to pray...

He stopped short. A familiar figure was standing there in the twilight, among the statues.

Jaune: "... Adam?!"

Adam: "..." He was staring at the statues "I remember... I remember coming here with you. To play at being a samurai, a great warrior. I learned the history of the great battles of the Arcs... And I found myself inspired."

Jaune is silent. He walks slowly towards Adam. He stops next to him, afraid, but... Something about Adam's tone is almost reassuring.

Jaune: "I remember. We had wooden swords. You were... Always better than me."

Adam: "... Yes... But you always got back up... And when our mothers were upset with your bruises, you always said you were the one who was clumsy."

Jaune: "I was... I wasn't good at blocking."

There is the tiniest hint of a smile on Adam's face.

Adam: "You threw me under the bus though... The pies at the fair? You took more than you should have."

Jaune: "What? No I didn't. You ate four! I only ate three!"

Adam: "..." chuckles "I ate five."

Jaune: "..." snickers "Me too... We both got in trouble for that. You took the blame."

Adam: "I was older. I should have taken responsibility."

Silence fell. Jaune sucked in a breath.

Jaune: "Adam... Why are you here?"

Adam: A long silence "... You're going after Cinder, aren't you?"

Jaune: "Yeah."

Adam: "You'll die in the attempt. Nothing can stop what is coming."

Jaune: "What is coming, Adam?"

Adam: "The final war. The war to end all wars. There will be a reckoning. A thousand years of slavery and misery will be repaid... And humanity will be no more."

Jaune: "No... You can't mean that, Adam! Not all humans are evil! You can't judge them all and sentence them to death!"

Adam: "I am not the one who chooses this. But I am bound to her decision. Bound to her will."

Jaune: "Who is she?"

Adam: "You'll find out soon enough."

Jaune: "She can't... You can't just sell yourself over to her, Adam! You swore you'd never be a slave again!"

Adam: "... In the end, we are all slaves, Jaune."

Jaune: "That's bullshit! Adam... Please. You wanted to be a hero of justice!"

Adam: nods "I did... But there is no such thing as justice, Jaune. Only power, and who wields it."

Jaune: "Then why come here at all?! Have you come to kill me?"

Adam: "... No. I just... I wanted to say goodbye. I'm sorry... The next we meet, I will kill you. Or you will kill me. There is no in between."

Jaune: "... I won't kill you. I refuse to."

Adam: "... Then you will die."

Jaune: "Adam!"

Adam: "Good bye, Jaune. I'm sorry... But childhood must give way to the future."

Adam flees into the night.

Jaune: "ADAM!" He holds up his hand "Adam..." He lowers his hand, and bows his head in sorrow

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Adam paced in his office. He considered everything from every angle, every permutation. He looked through all the intel they had on Jaune Arc. He hummed as he beheld his holo plot. He scratched his chin.

"Run simulation 224," he ordered the projector. The device complied, and holographic representations of Jaune and Blake appeared. Blake in a sailor fuku uniform favored by Menagerian prep schools, and Jaune in a suitable middle school uniform from Fuujin.

"Oh Adam, we are best friends, despite being human and Faunus," Adam muttered in Jaune's tone.

"I know," Adam said, "We are the truest of brothers. Our bond cannot be broken."

"Oh no!" Adam pitched his voice up to imitate Blake, "I love you both, Jaune and Adam! But my heart is set on Adam and liberating all Faunus kind!"

"My heart is broken, but I understand," Adam imitated Jaune, "My brother, please take care of her."

Adam nodded, bowing his head.

"Of course my brother..." He raised his head. "At least I was, until you betrayed me in the future!"

"You can't blame him for that, Adam!" Adam again imitated Blake's voice as best he could, "I have chosen my own path! It is destiny!"

"No," Adam cried, "It is not destiny! I shall break the wheel of fate and make my own choices!"

"I'm sorry my brother, but I must fight you to the death!" Adam said in Jaune's voice, "I too love her, and must take her from you!"

"Never!" Adam declared, "It is my regret that we must fight, brother. We could have been true friends. Forever... But I cannot forgive this."

Adam switched to his Jaune voice, sounding regretful.

"Standing here, I realize. You are just like me, trying to make history."

Adam nodded, his own voice full of sorrow.

"But who's to judge, the right from wrong. When our guard is down, I think we'll both agree... That violence breeds violence. But in the end..."

He switched to his Jaune voice and lifted up his sword.

"It has to be this way-!"

"LORD ADAM!" Trifa cried, as she burst in through the door. Adam immediately shut off the holograms and glared at Trifa.

"What?!"

"You wanted to know when preparations were complete for the plan, Lord Adam!" Trifa cried, terrified at Adam's rage. Adam growled.

"Knock! Knock on my door next time!"

"YES SIR!"

Adam paused and glared death at her.

"Did you see anything?"

"No sir! I didn't see you playing with your holograms again!" Trifa cried.

"GOOD!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

RWBY and the rest of JNPR were in the gallery over the main Council Hall, watching Jaune at work. He was at the podium, giving a speech on a bill.

Jaune: "... And as demonstrated on the holo, our military readiness has been drastically below historical norms, even accounting for the peaceful times we find ourselves in. Relying on Atlas and private Hunter Guilds is clearly not doing enough to deter bandit and Grimm activity in frontier settlements or even near major cities, and incursions by the White Fang and other rogue actors are increasing. Furthermore, our bases in Mistral have been getting by with second hand supplies in multiple instances, and our replacements for our frontline carriers are now three years behind schedule. Is this how we treat our fighting men and women? This anti-military sentiment may win votes but the reality is that the Valean Defense Force desperately needs more funding, and more respect. While I myself do hope to become a Huntsman in the future, I respect the fighting men and women who join the VDF to serve their country. They deserve better! Thank you, Madame Chairwoman."

Yang: "Huh... He's actually pretty good. He at least explained everything in an easy to follow way."

Weiss: "For you, clearly."

Yang: "Hey! I'm not the dumb blonde!"

Ruby: "No, just a traitorous one."

Yang: "What?! I said I was his girlfriend so he wouldn't get attacked by groupies, that's all! I'm just doing my job to protect him!"

Pyrrha: "Really?" Ominous smile "Don't you think you should have informed the rest of us before you did that?"

Yang: "What for?" Deadly smile "Seems like you had your shot and blew it, Cereal Girl."

Pyrrha: "Oh? Did I? Perhaps I can make my own luck with your misfortune."

Yang: "What kind of misfortune?"

Pyrrha: "Broken bones."

Yang: "Bring it on, Red! Maybe getting tended by Jaune in the hospital afterward would be worth it~!"

Weiss: "Would you two please stop?! Not here, have some decorum!"

Ruby: "Yeah!"

Nora: "Yeah! Whatever that is. Ooh! Look! The Puppy eating Lady is speaking!"

Blake: frowns deeply

Ruby: "Puppy eating lady?!"

Prunella Glocken takes the podium opposite Jaune, and smiles rather unpleasantly.

Prunella: "Thank you, Madame Chairwoman. While young Councilman Arc clearly has spirit, his inexperience is showing. Overall Grimm attacks have been falling in recent years, and our alliance with Atlas has ensured we don't need to spend nearly as much on our defense forces as in the past. Mister Arc may have grown up with tales of his Nana and Papa's heroic deeds in the Great War when Mantle and Mistral were our enemies, but that time is long past. Perhaps his love of battle, glory, and headlines with his delinquent girlfriend makes him imagine that fiscal and political realities don't matter. But they do. I hope the young Councilman will learn to temper his arguments with more wisdom going forth, and maybe keep his girlfriend in line. Thank you, Madame Chairwoman."

Yang: "What?! That bitch!"

Chairwoman Browning: "We will take a quick recess before final statements by both sides. Thank you."

Jaune headed off to his office, his bodyguards in tow. Nobody said anything until they were back in his office.

Yang: "Where does she get off mocking you like that?! I'd have punched her in her smug face!"

Weiss: "The nerve! She didn't even have a real argument, she just used ad hominen!"

Ruby: "Yeah! Ad what?"

Ren: "It means she insulted Jaune."

Ruby: "THE NERVE!"

Nora: "Want me to break her kneecaps, Jaune-Jaune?"

Jaune: sigh "No."

Nora: "Reeeeallly sure?"

Jaune: "Yes." He sits at his desk and rubs his eyes "I mean... I put a lot of work and effort into that presentation. But she just insults me, makes me look like a kid and she'll probably have the votes to beat down the bill."

Pyrrha: "Come on Jaune. You did a very good job. I think a number of Councillors were swayed. You laid out the facts and tried to appeal to their better natures!"

Blake: "Which seldom works in politics."

Ren: "Agreed. Most politicians are not like you, Jaune. They will be asking 'what's in it for me?'"

Jaune: "Hmmm... So, what's in it for Prunella Glocken to maintain things as they are now?"

Ren: nods "Yes."

Weiss: "Well, she does deal extensively with the SDC-I've seen her at many functions my father throws when he's doing business with Vale. So clearly, Atlas getting more defense contracts over Valean companies is in her interest."

Ruby: "That's despicable!"

Jaune: "But unfortunately, it's only rumors, not hard evidence-"

Blake hands over some documents. Jaune blinks and looks them over.

Jaune: "What the... These are emails where Prunella Glocken is communicating with how she'll get paid handsomely for suppressing the native Valean Defense industry?!"

Blake: "Yes. Sorry I couldn't get more but I believe this is enough."

Jaune: "Wha-Where did you get this stuff?!"

Blake: "Probably best not to ask such questions. Plausible deniability."

Ruby: "Blaaake! I thought we talked about you going all cat burglar!"

Blake: "Why do you think I got these documents by those means?"

Ruby: "So, can we send her to jail with this?"

Weiss: "No, that would require a lot more political capital than we have... We could blackmail her into voting our way."

Yang: "Seriously?"

Weiss: "What? That's politics!"

Jaune: "... No. No, I won't do that. Besides, if she demanded an investigation, that might get you in trouble, Blake. I'm not going to play by her rules and I'm not going to potentially sacrifice a friend."

Blake: smiles, pleased

Jaune: "I have a better idea."

One hour later, the Council reconvenes. Jaune takes his podium.

Jaune: "Madame Chairwoman, thank you. I would like for everyone to-"

Nora: "JAUNE-JAUNE!" She rushes up and holds up her Scroll "I HAVE WORDS THAT ARE IMPORTANT!"

Prunella: "What the-Why is one of your groupies disrupting proceedings, Mister Arc?"

Jaune: "Huh... If the Chairwoman would indulge me?"

Chairwoman Browning: raises an eyebrow "Perhaps a bit of indulgence is warranted for young Mister Arc."

Jaune: "I suggest everyone check their Scrolls and VNN."

They do so. Jaune helpfully projects it on the holo. Lisa Lavender smiled as she read the news.

Lisa: "-Once again, our top story: Councilwoman Prunella Glocken is implicated in a scheme to take bribes from the Atlasian Defense Industry to keep the Valean Defense Industry down. As these documents prove, and accompanying emails, the Councilwoman has been doing this for years and-"

Prunella Glocken, bright red in anger, glares at Jaune.

Prunella: "What kind of a smear campaign is this?! You arranged this-this fraud!"

Jaune: "Me? I've been here the whole time, check the security cameras. All my friend did was alert me to something I think everyone should know."

Prunella: "Of course you had something to do with this! The timing is too convenient!"

Jaune: shrugs "I think you have bigger problems than me, Councilwoman-"

Chairwoman Browning: "Enough. I believe we will adjourn for today. However, Councilwoman Glocken: Rest assured, we will be launching an investigation into these claims, as we would with any such news stories."

Browning hits the gavel on her podium, and she heads out. Prunella shoots Jaune a nasty look as she leaves with her caucus. Ozpin and Winchester come up to Jaune.

Ozpin: "A bit dramatic, Mister Arc."

Rufus Winchester: "And could have used better execution..." smirk "But well done."

Jaune: Poker faced "I have no idea what you're talking about."

Ozpin: chuckles "Of course. We'll have the vote on the defense bill tomorrow. I believe it will go better this time... But do try to be more discreet in the future."

Jaune leaves, meets his friends in his office... And sighs in relief.

Jaune: "Well... We got away with it. For now." He smiles at Blake "Thanks Blake. How can I repay you?"

Blake: "Well... I wouldn't mind if you took me out to dinner."

Yang: "Hey! I'm his girlfriend!"

Jaune: "Eh?"

Pyrrha: "I didn't hear him say that!"

Yang: "We might as well make it official since we've been on a date!"

Ruby: "It's not official!"

Pyrrha: "Exactly! Besides, I should be his-his pretend girlfriend! I'm his partner!"

Ruby: "I'm his best friend!"

Yang: "You're way too young! We don't need him getting associated with Repstein Island!"

Ruby: "I'M ONLY TWO YEARS YOUNGER!"

Weiss: "Honestly, you're acting like children. You should all calm down."

Jaune: "Uh, thanks Weiss?"

Weiss: "You're welcome. After all, I should pose as his girlfriend. I'm the most respectable."

Pyrrha: "Not by half you are!"

Jaune watches in disbelief as the five girls argue over him. He looks over to Ren and Nora, who are sitting on the couch.

Jaune: "Uh... You guys wanna jump in?"

Ren: "I'm straight."

Nora: "I love you Jaune but I'd only consider it if you brought Renny in, too!"

Jaune: "What?!"

Nora: "I have my limits!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

A very silly idea... And addition to the Arc Clan: An old friend of Nick Arc's. A famous showman, singer, and dancer... Kermit D. Frog.

Weiss: "Wait, how does a Paladin Hunter know one of the most famous showmen in history?!"

Kermit: "Ah, well... Nick and Isabel actually saved our bacon once during a Grimm attack! Quite literally, in Piggy's case."

Piggy: "And you haven't brought the bacon home yet, Kermie~!"

Kermit: "I keep telling you, Piggy, we're just friends."

Piggy: "Uh huh. That's not what you said last night~."

Kemit: "Ah, Piggy-"

Fozzie: "You might say Piggy a-boars you, ehhh? Ehhhh? Wakka wakka!"

Kermit: "Fozzie, please don't help-"

Fozzie: "You Lothario you, you swined and dined her! Ahhhh?"

Kermit: "Fozzie, enough-!"

Fozzie: "Honestly, with how often you pretend you two aren't together you might say you have... Ham-nesia? Ehhhhh? Wakka wakka-!"

Kermit: "Enough already, Fozzie!"

Piggy: "Honestly Kermie, why must you act so ashamed of me? Is there another woman in your life?"

Fozzie: "With you around, he doesn't have any more room! Ahhhh?"

Piggy: "HI-YAH!"

Fozzie goes flying.

Fozzie: "AAAAHHHHH!"

Weiss: "... Okay, now I can see it. They're just as weird as the rest of your relatives."

Jaune: "Weirder."

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Cinder: "And this is my plot for the Vytal Tournament! Any questions?"

Statler: "I'd call this a medium plan!"

Waldorf: "What's a medium plan?"

Statler: "It's not rare, and it's not well done!"

Waldorf and Statler: "DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Statler: "Boy that Cinder Fall is in a class of her own!"

Waldorf: "Sure is! Everyone graduated ahead of her!"

Waldorf and Statler: "DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Waldorf: "I gotta say, I think Emerald's barking up the wrong tree when it comes to Cinder."

Statler: "Really? I thought it was her performance was wooden!"

Waldorf: "Well let's face it, she's nowhere near as big a bitch as Cinder!"

Waldorf and Statler: "DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Statler: "You know, for an assassin named after the Greek God of speed, I'd thought Mercury would be quicker."

Waldorf: "On his feet?"

Statler: "On the uptake!"

Waldorf and Statler: "DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Waldorf: "Oh golly, I do love Neo. I always loved pantomime."

Statler: "You old fool! She's been talking this whole time, your hearing aid battery's out of juice!"

Waldorf: "What?"

Statler: "I said your hearing aid is out of juice!"

Waldorf: turns it up "Why, it's fully charged!"

Statler: "HA! Got ya, ya old coot! Every time you fall for it! Hahahaha!"

Waldorf: "Joke's on him! I was never watching her mouth!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

"Hey, look at Little Red down there with that scythe! Thinks she's Death himself!"

"With how often she trips over that cape, there's only one thing she's likely to reap!"

"What's that?"

"Herself!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Check out the Ice Princess! Thinks she's a ballerina with fancy swordplay!"

Statler scoffed. "Ballerina? Her footwork's so stiff, she's more like a figurine in a music box!"

"There's one difference between her and a music box!"

"What's that?"

"I'd want to listen to the music box over her!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Oh, look at Blondie! She's got more firepower in her hair than her fists!"

Waldorf chuckled. "Yeah, but her punches hit like a wet noodle compared to her ego!"

"Her Semblance lets her take hits and get stronger!"

"Well given all the losses she's been catching, she should be invincible!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Hey, look! The Cat Girl's being quiet and not yammering on about prejudice and what have you!"

"I guess that proves how catty she truly is!"

"How?"

"She caught her own tongue!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

"So, how's our great-nephew Jaune doing?"

"Well, he's not much of a knight or a squire, despite how hard he works. Poor kid."

"I think I know which role would suit him best!"

"What's that?"

"Court jester!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Still, how about that Pyrrha Nikos? Beautiful, talented, amazing! Bet she practices that hair flip in the mirror!"

"So do I, but you never compliment me for it!"

"You old fool, you barely have any hair left!"

"Still more than you, ya old coot! Hahahahaha!"

"Still, that Pyrrha Nikos might make Beacon into a wonderful institution of higher learning and defending the people!"

"So totally different from what it's been up til now!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Wow! Thunder Thighs down there's got enough energy to power a Dust mine!"

"Yeah but her brain's running a 3 watt!"

"A 3 watt? That's not too bright!"

"Neither is she!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Look at Mr. Zen, all cool and collected! Bet he's meditating to ignore how boring he is!"

Statler grinned. "Boring? His fighting style's so plain, it makes white bread look spicy!"

"Still, he's got the perfect Semblance! He's invisible to Grimm."

"Heck, he's so dull he's invisible to everyone!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Sun Wukong, tail swishing as he spun Ruyi Bang and Jingu Bang, flashed a grin at his team. Statler scoffed. "Monkey Boy thinks he's the star of the show! Bet he spends more time grooming that tail than training!"

"Ha! With how he chases after that Cat girl, he's not grooming! He's gooning!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

Waldorf zeroed in on Scarlet next. "Check out the Redhead with the pirate act! Thinks he's a swashbuckler, but he's more like a deckhand!"

Statler smirked. "Deckhand? He'd get seasick in a kiddie pool!"

"Also, how is he able to fly?"

"His Semblance lets him as long as he's thinking happy thoughts!"

"With his team, I know how he's gonna end up."

"What?"

"Grounded!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Big Green down there looks like he could crush a Grimm with one hand! Too bad his strategy's as dull as his sword!"

Waldorf nodded. "Dull? He's so slow, the Grimm'll die of old age before he swings!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

"Blue Hair's got all the swagger, but he's too scared to use a Semblance that makes everything wet?

Statler laughed. "Well, that explains his love life!"

"DOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

May Zedong approaches Kermit.

May: "Hello Mister The Frog? Um, sir?"

Kermit: yells in shock "Oh my, I'm sorry, I didn't notice you there."

May: "I get that a lot."

Kermit: "What can I do for you? And please, just call me Kermit."

May: "Oh Kermit, I don't know how to be more confident. Can you help me?"

Kermit: "So you want to be more confident you say?"

May: "Ah! Y-yes! Um... I mean my job is to be very stealthy and hard to spot... But um... I'd like it if... Certain people would notice me."

Kermit: "Oh well, I'd be happy to help you be more confident. You just have to hold your head high, stand up straight and walk like nothing can stop you. But you know, if you want someone SPECIFIC to notice you, it might help to know who it is?"

May: "U-Ummmm... Uhhh... Y-You know... Ummm..."

Jaune: "Hey Uncle Kermit! Robin and are I going to the pool!"

Robin: "Yeah! They have a big whirlpool!"

Jaune: "Hey May!"

May: "H-H-Hey!" Blushing

Jaune: "Would you like to come to the pool with us?"

Kermit: Sees the signs "Say May, this right here would be a good exercise for you. Why don't you join Robin and Jaune down at the pool! You both don't mind do you?"

Jaune: "Of course not Uncle Kermit!"

Robin: "Yeah! She looks nice!"

May: "U-Um... Um... I-I just have my school swimsuit..."

Kermit: "Well that's fine May, it starts with just that. Go on, go have some fun at the pool!" gently nudges her towards Jaune

May: "O-Okay! Um, let me go change!" She runs off, blushing happily

Ruby: "Hey Robin! Hey Jaune! Hey Kermit!"

Kermit: "Oh hey there Ruby! What brings you here today?"

Jaune: "Hey Ruby!"

Robin: "Hey Ruby!"

Ruby: "We're all going to the pool, right?"

Jaune: "Well, we're waiting on May to show up."

Ruby: "Oh?"

Jaune: "Yeah, she's getting changed!"

May: "O-Okay! I'm ready!"

May shows up... In a traditional Japanese schoolgirl swimsuit... Which is a tad tight around her generous curves

Jaune: "Uh... I uh..."

May: "Sorry... I think it's the wrong size... Um..."

Ruby: "Oh... Geez..." Fumes

Jaune: "Umm... N-No! It's uh, it's great!"

Robin: "Really great! Can you carry me? I think the ride would be a lot more comfortable!"

May: "Oh, of course!"

Robin is held by May... And the little frog looks very smug

May: "Let's go to the pool!"

Jaune: "Yeah!"

Ruby: "Yeah... Hey Jaune? Carry me there?"

Jaune: "Sure."

May: "H-Hey...!"

Ruby: "You made your choice!"

Kermit: "Oh geez...I'm not the only green one here today...."

 

[CountvonBarnOwl]

(DRAFT) Cyber-Whitley AU: Winter Finds Out (DRAFT)

Specialist Lieutenant Colonel Winter Schnee exited the strangely-shaped airship that had picked her up from a military skydock in Atlas and flown her to a base somewhere in eastern Rana Niejta.

Two men met her on the platform. "Specialist Schnee?" One of them asked as if they would not have shot her transport down if they had believed it was anybody but her.

She nodded along. The guard pulled something that wasn't quite a scroll, not with its full frame and the hazy red light that shone through its interior. He stared at her through it, looking up and down her body for a second. "Yup, she's clean, General"

"Right, come with us," the general nodded, shaking snow off of the scarf that he wrapped around his peaked cap and balaclava, and Winter had cursed herself for not wearing something at least little heavier than her ordinary mission wear. She could insulate herself with Aura, and the temperature wouldn't be a problem unless General Amzel held her out here on the platform for two hours, but that didn't seem to be a problem. Although part of her could not help but feel a small unreasonable pang of envy for the man.

It would not be long before Winter was off of the skydock and walking into a vast monstrosity of a base that was nestled into a jagged, trailing crest of the mountain range. This building, on one of the few mountains that hadn't turned up any ruins of religious significance in Rana Niejta was the headquarters of the 9th Division, named Jotun, was a complex evocative of the architecture that had informed Valean horror movies of the early-mid post-war period, and the books from the thirty or fifty years before that had inspired those movies, but crammed into the skybox of a video game console of the kind that was coming out when Winter was ten or thirteen. Transformers that looked like they were modified into movie props stood imperious, connected to spires that concealed observation and security equipment, as well as weapon emplacements by cables. Jotun itself was one of four smaller complexes strung out around the sort of valley or box canyon down the mountain on her left side that made up the whole complex, the infamous Bell Tower - a source of about a third of the army's folklore and smoke pit spook stories - or as it was properly known, Jotun-4, sat at the back of the valley, farthest from what was generously called a "footpath" that could theoretically access the canyon if someone somehow braved the climb, and was the only entry way not mediated by Jotun-1's system of cable cars.

"How much of your assignment did General Ironwood actually give you?" Amzel asked once they had gotten inside, taking off his scarf and balaclava, and revealing the crescent shaped scar that adorned his nose and right cheek, before warping around his eye below the brow, and the vermillion collar tabs of a general, with two repetitions of the golden pattern, unlike General Ironwood's four, as well as the curly shock of auburn-orange hair that sat at odds with the grey goatee on his chin.

"Not a lot sir, I was merely told that I was coming here to help you gather data on one of your projects." Winter replied. General Ironwood had sounded like he had wanted to tell her more, but he had made it very clear that even he did not know everything and General Amzel was keeping a lid on everything for the sake of "information security." Which was a new turn of phrase for the mad scientist, whose eyes, even now, glimmered with the spark of childish enthusiasm at the prospect of sharing his latest accomplishment.

They were checked over at a security terminal before they boarded the cable car. In a sort of tunnel with a hydraulic door at each end, Winter and the General had been stopped by a desk clerk in full body armor, situated in a sort of ticket booth apparatus made out of angled steel and reinforced glass, adjacent to a remote-controlled machine gun mounted into the ceiling. Apparently, they took security very seriously at the Jotun base.

Most installations did not have inward-facing defenses.

"Name, Rank, and orders, please." The desk clerk said as Winter dropped her signed orders into the receptacle drawer. "Winter Schnee, Specialist-Lieutenant Colonel, my assignment is to help generate data for the general." The clerk nodded after scanning over her papers back into the drawer, before closing it on his end, and letting her retrieve them.

General Amzel merely dropped a badge on a lanyard that he produced from his pocket into the drawer. The guard stuck it into some sort of reader machine. "Very good, sir," the guard replied as he returned the badge. Then he disappeared behind the partition in his pillbox-cubicle. A second later the light on the door that had blocked their path opened.

"Forgive me, Miss Schnee, unfortunately, you won't get to see the Bell Tower's interior during this assignment." The general said, not that Winter minded. Everybody had heard the stories of the Bell Tower and the Faunus experiments that melded black magic with mad science to turn the tide during the Great War or the Faunus Revolution (depending on who you asked) either in Atlas Academy or basic training, especially around Halloween. And unfortunately, Andres happened to know the version where the prisoners lived... or, lived on... anyway. Winter suppressed a shiver. Because he had decided to tell it during a survival exercise during Team WAFL's second year. Winter would be lying if she said she got any sleep that night. Or if she had spent her turn on watch scanning the snowbanks for Grimm advancing on their encampment.

"I don't really mind," she said.

"We will instead be going to Jotun-2." The General gestured her to the bank of cable car docks farthest to her left.

Winter stared at the man, flat-faced. "And what is the ghost story about that one, I wonder?"

"Oh, nothing," Amzel explained, "in fact we're tying to come up with a name for it now. The men wanted to pay tribute to the place our base has in Atlas military lore by having a write-in contest for and ominous names for the other Jotun installations. 'The Cauldron' seems to be a favorite for Jotun-3, so far. But we're having difficulties with Jotun-2. Mostly because too many people, I think, want to sell the madhouse angle, but can't make it work without trampling on the atmosphere and traditions that made the Bell Tower work so well in the first place."

The cable car ride itself was spent mostly in silence, and partly in an awkward attempt at Winter asking why that large arachnid walker was climbing up the wall of the ridge near what she believed to be Jotun-3. To which the general told her straight to her face, that there were no plans to replace all non-reserve Colossus walkers with a more current, "and certainly, a more soundly designed," model. There were also no feasibility studies being conducted on hexapedal platforms in the fifty-meter range, and that what she saw was probably just a crashed weather balloon.

It would have been a standard military issue denial, had he not muttered something under his breath about... Winter decided not to inquire, not with that omen of ill fortune in her peripheral vision, sticking up like a black lightning rod silhouetted against the snow. So Winter let the rest of the ride sink into awkward silence.

---

Count von BarnAuthor - Interactions too static, dialogue too wooden. Feels more like the entry to Stahl Arms Deep South in Killzone 3. No elements of gothic horror. Don't give enough description of surroundings but cannot do more to avoid getting bogged down - Solution = Sever into prequel & develop therefrom?

---

There was another checkpoint terminal like the first one waiting for them when they had gotten off. Winter would have made a joke about something taking over the bodies of anyone riding the cable cars, but quickly thought better of it. She probably would not like the answer.

After being led through the disorienting interior of a compound that could be described as looking like three gothic abbeys conjoined by covered bridges and flak towers, crowned by an attempt to build a power station with no blueprints, Winter was led to a modest conference room that looked more like a converted break room than anything else, if the refrigerator, sink, microwave, pantry, water cooler, and coffee machine arranged around the countertop at the back wall were anything to go by.

Six other people were in the room. Starting at the left were man with black hair and yellow-green eyes, and behind him another man, smaller, with darker skin, and bald, holding a briefcase and scanning the room back and forth. Then there was a woman sitting down at the table, and enjoying her lunch, a cheeseburger, if the wagging of her lupine tail was anything to go by. The Faunus traits were pronounced in her, because she also had a second pair ears that poked out from the braided bun arrangement that she had pulled her purple hair into.

That did it for the people in suits. The other three looked to be men in some sort of powered exoskeleton armor that evoked images of the protective gear worn by the Mantle's Hellhound units during the Great War, complete with the glowing red goggles, that had been mixed with modern industrial HAZMAT suits. They were carrying some sort of peculiar looking guns and crowding around the woman who occupied the table.

"Mghmmgh, Schnee's girl." The woman tried to address her mid bite. Winter's brow furrows. "This is who you specifically requested to test our project, Overseer?" She gestured to Winter with the half-eaten burger.

"In order to be sure that we have truly bridged the Aura Gap, we need a Specialist Officer with a record beyond reproach." The taller man in the suit explained in a Balto accent. "And a General's adjutant, to be sure." The smaller man said, his voice flat and neutral. But Winter had not been paying attention to that. Winter let herself get distracted by the Overseer's claim that the Aura Gap had finally been crossed.

The Aura Gap was a term of art in strategic analysis and the measurement of combat efficacy. It measured the capability gap that existed between those with Aura, and those without. And it was vast. Average soldiers couldn't walk off a tandem HEAT warhead, lift and throw tons of concrete, outrun conventional vehicles, or summon dozens of phantasmal Grimm to fight by their side. So, naturally, the Army wanted to figure out just how to bridge said gap. And apparently, the 9th Division, 35th Regiment, based out of the Jotun Complex had succeeded. Division and Regiment of what? Winter did not know, and it probably didn't matter. The names written on the document that she had been passing back and forth with those desk sergeants were more for an administrative cover than a physical cover. Winter oversaw a training exercise with the 35th. That's what the mission and personnel records will say. So, Winter must have done a training exercise with the 35th, certainly nothing groundbreaking.

"Now the problem is that your boss, and the Council, want proof. And simulations won't cut it." The woman started gesturing at Winter with the remains of the burger in her left hand, showing off the armband with the downward-pointing red triangle that had a cut across each of its edges just to the right of each corner, with a sort of white odachi driven through the left side. The logo of the Stark family, and conglomerate, Winter noted, that explained how she knew Jacques. One of the armored men passed the woman a remote as she finished her meal. She dimmed the lights in the conference room, and brought the large holoscreen that dominated the wall opposite the kitchenette to life.

"Infantry Cybernetic Exoframe, Model: Dragon, or the ICE Dragon, for short. To enter production via pending a successful field test phase, which we will hopefully begin if everything goes well today. I wish I could take credit for designing this but honor has always been the Stark family's forte, so credit for the design must go to General Amzel, I just helped build the fucking thing."

"You're too kind, Chairwoman." The general by Winter's side replied. "As she said, colonel, this is the ICE Dragon. A mechanical replacement body for soldiers wounded beyond the prowess of medical science. An intact brain is placed into the skull-housing where it will interface with the Dragon's main processor, the Apogee System. This processor and its subsystems mediate dataflows, sensory information, and synaptic transmissions because no organic brain can handle all of it alone."

The general was not exaggerating. HUD, night vision, thermal vision, enhanced vision and hearing, 120 meter range sonar, 1 kilometer range radar, a two-way radio with a 25 kilometer range, and much, much more.

"The Dragon can also share sensory and tracking data with up to five other units, enabling it to coordinate with AK-130s, Spider Drones, and, once they hit production, other Dragons." The general went on. "All of this is done through two sensory booms mounted on the sides of the head, and partially covered by the two AR visor panels that slide down over the Dragon's face. These panels enhance the ICE Dragon's visual and radar tracking capabilities and offer an extra layer of ballistic protection."

"It tops out at just over 110 kph in a flat-out sprint. Its standing jump length is roughly 19 meters, and it can clear six at the apex of said jump. The armor is composed of ceramics with an extra ablative layer, a layer of high density plastic reinforced with high-level ballistic glass all over a layer of foamed steel with a titanium backplate. It is equipped with a pseudo-synaptic system of fiberoptic cables and the musculature is composed entirely of CNT fibers. Each forearm has two pop-up hardpoints for concealable weapons. Each shoulder contains a further articulated hardpoint for a launcher mount for eight fifty-five millimeter missiles." The general rattled off his new weapon's capabilities like an ecstatic child.

"Did you have any limitations when designing this thing, sir?" Winter couldn't help but ask with a half-suppressed snort.

"Size and budget." Amzel responded. "But at 244 centimeters, I'm just under the height limit. I admit I'm a little over the empty weight limit, but..." The general trailed off.

"The limit doesn't matter, not now, anyway." The Overseer cut in. "Your assignment, colonel, is to render the Dragon combat ineffective before it depletes your Aura into the red.

"And we want real fucking data, so go all-out." Chairwoman Stark ordered with a sweep of her arm.

"Excellent. Now let's go meet the Warrant Officer." General Amzel said with a clap of his hands.

Chairwoman Stark vacated the table and sashayed out of the conference room, followed by her bodyguards, then the Overseer and his aide, then Winter, and General Amzel.

The group soon entered a variable training room, where the layout could be manipulated from the observation deck. When she was greeted by the cyan lighting grid in the mostly black room, Winter marveled again at just how normal the Jotun complex looked from the inside.

---

Count von BarnAuthor - Atmosphere not tense enough. Again, should probably use saved space from Section 1 removal to flesh out character interactions. Differing interests should be at play here. Also Amzel's insanity, Lowenhardt's duplicity, and Stark's flippancy, and powerlust tinged with madness, should all come out here.
- Leave Stark eating, the others probably wouldn't let her smoke.
- Lowenhardt dialogue fine, pacing and spacing fine. Re-evaluate to see if I am missing anything.
- Set Amzel off, or save it for later if Winter wins the fight?

---

The only oddity was the avalanche of armor and servos that was the so-called Warrant Officer, sitting on one of the blocks, next to what looked like a portable 25mm gatling gun with some sort of cannon or large bore launcher mounted on the outer side, and examining an ikakalaka, a broad sword with an angular, spatulated tip that created an armor-piercing pick on each side.

"Warrant Officer, your opponent." The Overseer said.

The Warrant Officer grabbed his gun by whatever grip was mounted behind the handguard and dropped down. Winter got a look at the whole rig as the Warrant Officer fell. About 150 centimeters in length, maybe. Probably a bit less, and with a large ammo box situated high toward the rear of the weapon, behind the side mount, but even absent that, the weapon would be massive.

"Greetings, Specialist Schnee." The Warrant Officer's modulated voice came from behind his closed AR visor. He pressed a button on the side of his blade's handle, and it began to transform. Servos in the heavy-looking sword unveiled themselves and folded pieces of steel over one another until the blade had shifted into a large pistol, one with a hexagonal barrel, a ported muzzle break that looked like it belonged on an anti-material rifle, and a breechblock that looked like a field howitzer's. Then the Warrant Officer's arm bent the wrong way at the elbow, before his wrist spun in the wrong direction, and he held the gun to his waist. As soon as the Warrant Officer let go, the gun slammed into his hip. A magnetic holster, Winter noted.

She wasn't impressed, and she was already picking apart his design for comparative weak spots that Edelweiss could likely cut through. His joints, obviously, had the same weaknesses that plate mail needed to make the suit maneuverable. But also his waist and strangely, his upper arms, looked comparatively thin. Winter began piecing together her plan of attack.

"Alright. You both know the rules. Each of you will proceed to the designated corners of the training room. The terrain will adjust. You will maneuver and engage your opponent. The exercise will stop when the first of two things happens. One. Winter Schnee's Aura falls to 15% or lower. Same as the Vytal Festival. Number two, the ICE Dragon is rendered combat ineffective. That means all of its weapons are removed or disabled. It cannot fight and it cannot run away. Now, Warrant Officer, your anti-capture countermeasures do not count as a weapon." The Overseer explained.

"I am insulted at the insinuation Doctor Lowenhardt." The Warrant Officer replied.

"Good, proceed to your corner and prepare to begin." The Overseer ordered, gesturing to a far corner in the training room.

Without a further word, the Warrant Officer lumbered and clanked away, and Winter began pacing back to her own corner. As she did she thought of another weakness. The EOD collar that protected the machine's neck was low enough in front to not clutter his face-mounted radar. If she could get in close and drive Edelweiss and Galanthus down into his core to disable him The main issues would be the Warrant Officer's strength, his pop-up weapons, and most critically, his reaction time.

The General claimed that he and the Chairwoman had built an opponent that did not have, or need, Aura. She would have dismissed it as inter-service boasting and puffery, in any other case. But, here, in the Jotun Complex, where, even if the stories about the Bell Tower were not true, the bounds of possibility were driven ever further into the outer darkness. And that machine had every alarm bell that her time at Atlas Academy installed into her screaming. Just who was the Warrant Officer? Someone who lost almost everything besides his brain, obviously. But there was a smoldering resentment that his modulated voice hadn't fully hidden. The man was bitter. And why not? He was a brain in a jar. Granted, his 'jar' was built to go toe-to-toe with Hunters without the benefit of Aura. But the fact that he had ended up inside of it in the first place probably wasn't anything to be happy about. Not that Winter intended to give him any pity

"Ten." The Overseer's voice came over the intercom. "Nine..." Winter saw half a dozen figures standing behind the reinforced glass before redirecting her attention at the hulk that was lowering itself into a crouch.

"Five..." The blocks began to raise, lower and shift, building the terrain of their battlefield. The Warrant Officer disappeared from view as a wall of blocks slid in between them.

"Three, two, one. Begin." The Overseer's voice was drowned out by the sounding of a klaxon. Holographic displays reading Winter's Aura popped up high on the wall. 'Damn.' Winter thought, 'he's got a stream of real-time intel on my status.'

Rationally, she understood that it was a necessary safety feature. And she supposed it evened out. He did not have any Aura at all.

Winter jumped onto the closest pillar of blocks she could find. Her goal was surveillance, trying to find her enemy's location. She succeeded before she had landed. The Warrant Officer was also airborne, and he had jumped for what was probably the highest pillar he could access. She noticed his rotary cannon starting to spin up, and before either of them had landed, she could already see the backblast behind one of the pop-up batteries of a missile launching.

Winter threw up a Glyph to catch the missile. It was a miniscule thing thrown in the missile's way to make it detonate early, in fact, the cost to her Aura did not even register on the meter. Not that Winter was paying attention. She was already diving back behind cover. Her finely tuned senses could hear that the gatling gun's spin had reached its crescendo. And she did not want to be exposed for what came next.

Although what came next was not what Winter had expected. Instead of the double-BRRRRRT of a gatling cannon firing and its rounds exploding. She got a strange BABABABABA followed, and then intermingled with a clanking, clattering cacophony that almost sounded like chimes. Then she felt a fistful of impacts on her side and looked down. A partially deformed metal balls were rolling down beside her thigh. And that was when it hit her. The Warrant Officer had not been carrying a rotary cannon. It was a gatling auto-shotgun. And even though Winter was concealed, the fire showed no signs of stopping. Why..?

The answer hit her with another nine millimeter pellet. The Warrant Officer's sensor arrays! He was using his advanced senses to triangulate her position, and trusting his gun's volume of fire to generate enough ricochets to whittle down her Aura.

Winter moved. She couldn't stay still, not like this. She made a mistake, letting her strange opponent pin her down. But she could correct the error. She summoned a score of small Nevermores, and sent them along their way away from the dying barrage. Most would attack the Warrant Officer's flanks directly. But some would... occupy his attention.

The wurrr of the gatling gun sped up again as Winter ran behind another pillar and vaulted it. As she had assumed, the Warrant Officer's next volley shredded the majority of her summons, but as he walked the onslaught toward her, the rest came in low and struck not the Warrant Officer, but the pillar beneath him. As his footing crumbled, the Warrant Officer vaulted toward Winter again. He had given up finesse and control it seemed, and intended to leverage his superior size.

Winter responded by bringing the battlefield into the third dimension, completely. She created a series of Glyph platforms to jump up to. His response was predictable, and betrayed inexperience, not with his body, but with combat.

He had tried to launch another missile. Just as Winter had wanted. A flick of Winter's wrist and another trio of Glyphs had formed outboard of the Warrant Officer's flank and they launched a volley of Ice shards into him. One caught the articulated mount and exploded all over it, encasing it in ice as the missile took off. The missile exploded in that same instant, causing every other warhead in the battery to cook off.

The Warrant Officer let out a mechanical screech in frustration and anger as he unholstered his pistol and drew a bead on Winter, his ability to bend every joint every way letting him acquire her with ease. The pistol going off demolished the Glyph beneath her, but the shot diverted into the ceiling.

Winter created two more Glyphs to land on. And a pair of beowolves dropped out from the bottom side of each. The first dropped on the Warrant Officer, yanking the remaining missile pod free of its mooring, and weighing down the limb that held that giant shotgun, not just delaying his attempt to bring it up, but forcing him to land off-balance.

The Warrant Officer responded by pivoting a full 360 degrees on the joint that connected his leg to his torso, throwing the Beowolf clear, and positioning his sidearm hand in line with a second. 'But his gun is unloaded, that anti-material pistol needs to be reloaded after each shot.' And not only that, but the gun was starting to transform. However, two blocks of metal, each about the length of a subcompact pistol, and a little wider, had extended on small scissor frames from the arm holding what was again becoming a blade. 'Oh right,' Winter thought, 'two concealed guns in each arm.'

The second Beowolf was chewed up by a burst of AP rounds. But even through the rapidity of the machine pistols' discharge, Winter knew very well the exact kind of bang that a 12.7x55 made when fired in a training room. She let herself drop again, this time landing on a pillar close to the cyborg's, where she began charging a time dilation Glyph, and loading the Dust chambers in her weapon. For Galanthus, it would be Gravity Dust, and Hardlight Dust in Edelweiss. It was probably a poor decision to engage the monster up close, but her Aura probably could not survive if he actually got a hit in on her with one of that shotgun's barrages, and she wasn't eager to find out what kind of surprise was in its side-mount.

However, if her plan succeeded, she would be sending General Amzel and Chairwoman Stark back to the drawing board in the next exchange. Or, hopefully not. The ICE Dragon had proven as frightening a foe as its name had suggested. This was a good project. Just not enough to let a rookie knock a member of the Special Security Unit on her ass.

He proved more than a match for the Beowolves, though. He spun around like a top again, shredding them and filling the room with a sort of high-pitched hum as he did. With the benefit of her dilated time, Winter could see his trick. he was spinning his limbs like drills, but also vibrating them at high speed. Grinding hits like that would shred right through her Aura. Her decision to turn this battle into a quick-draw contest, had become even riskier, but apparently, it was the right decision. Playing the attrition game with an opponent wearing that much armor was a grim prospect. And if he could shred Aura in melee...

It would have to be one more blitz.

There was no way he could keep pace with her. Not with time dilation.

Except, he was.

His face moved. He was tracking her. BANG. His shotgun fired. BANG. Again, he was using the recoil to steer the gun's muzzle toward her. BANG. With time dilation, Winter could string together coherent thoughts in between each blast of a shotgun with a rate of fire around 1300 RPM. 'One more blast and all six of those barrels will be right in my face. Damn. Going to have to use Edelweiss early.' Winter made a snap tactical decision and swung her saber. The position of her blade, held presenting the point, rather than the edge, plus the odd angle at which the cyborg had balanced himself on one limb meant that none of his limbs were actually in line with each other. But that gun had to go.

Winter flicked and twisted her wrist, a hardlight barrier formed as an extension of the blade as it twisted, first passing through the lower receiver and part of the barrel assembly of the Warrant Officer's gun, and then through the calf of the leg he was balancing on.

The Warrant officer let out another mechanical roar of a scream in frustration as his weapon came to pieces. But he did not wallow. He was already moving, rotating on his hip joint, as he fell, counterclockwise. The weapon in his other arm, the sword with the spatulated head, let out an even higher pitched scream, like an oscillating saw, as it came down. It was an HF weapon. Winter was perturbed for an instant. By both the sudden noise, and by just how many anti-Aura weapons that General Amzel had managed to pack into the ICE Dragon frame.

Winter dodged instinctively, and fortunately, she dodged to her right. Had she dodged to her left, the Warrant Officer could have chained into an attack with his other leg. From here, she had a clear shot at his neck. She drove Galanthus down, a black propulsion glyph at it's pommel to make sure that it went through the ICE Dragon's armor. Even with a Gravity Dust charge in the blade, she wasn't taking any chances.

Time began to readjust to normal as Winter focused her power into something else besides her time dilation. But she had hit her target. Galanthus was now embedded to he hilt in a spark-spitting wound between where the jugular vein and the vocal cords would be on a normal man.

Then the spinning sword slammed into her side, taking a massive bite out of her remaining Aura, and launching her into another block.

"How is this not enough to call the match?" Winter said as she scraped herself the block that she had just scraped herself off of, while using her outer hand to slam a new Dust Cartridge into Edelweiss.

The machine man staggered toward her, not seeming very hampered by its missing foot or the puncture in its neck that coughed sparks and spurted gouts of molten blue fluid.

"Both of us remain combat effective. I recall that our instruction was to continue until one of us was rendered combat ineffective." The machine responded. "Scans of your heart rate, sweat volume, internal temperature, and skeletal integrity indicate that you are merely fatigued."

---

Count von BarnAuthor - Everything is coming apart here. No satisfactory-yet-plausible way to end confrontation.
Where did I go wrong?
Fight too drawn out. Definitely. But what to do away with? Tracking each blow and connecting it to the next is clearly exhaustive. But a symphony needs every note. What and where?

Lack of conclusion that is both satisfactory and plausible. Introducing an OC - or at the very least a canon character made RADICALLY different - by having them throttle a canon character that is not just a mook, unless played for comedy, is a tricky proposition. Therefore Winter's triumph over the ICE Dragon is more easy to write in a satisfying way. Plus, the story of Winter overcoming the machine itself is more satisfying. However, the ICE Dragon, in its current form, is clearly too much for a single AA-level Hunter. Solution = use a prior iteration. Set this earlier in the trial timeline.
> Idea - This fight, Winter's combat data, is what makes the ICE Dragon what it is when it faces the Ace Ops. - Added bonus, this is embarrassing. Something for Whitley to be ashamed of, knowing that he owes Winter for being where, and what, he is.
>> This opens the door to reconciliation between Whitley and Winter? No, they would have to learn to think about one another first.
>>> This will require a re-write

Aftermath - to be written - possibly as a Part 3? Points to hit:
1) Winter defeats the ICE Dragon Alpha-Iteration. Only as she is withdrawing her blade from the limbless stump of machine torso, does Overseer Lowenhardt address Whitley by name.

2) Winter's initial reaction is shock and horror. Whitley's is apathy - he is primarily afraid of being seen as taking his loss immaturely so he actively disguises the emotion that he does feel. Which is primarily inward-facing frustration.

3) Abruptly, their conversation cuts, and Winter fears for the worst. She runs to the observation booth to get Whitley's developers.

4) Winter comes into the observation booth only to hear Whitley again. He is shouting at, mostly General Amzel and Chairwoman Stark for not making him good enough. Amzel criticizes Whitley's usage of the tools at his disposal - Possibly, this is what gives him the idea to include so many backup weapons. Stark berates Whitley for losing his balls because he saw Winter.
> Conclusion = Have Whitley rely entirely on Hagelsturm & Panzerfaust. Panzerstecher and the on-board weapons will come later along with the top-tier composite armor.

5) Overseer Kirk plays peacemaker, first by agreeing that the ICE Dragon's present armament is inadequate and ordering Amzel to design more weapons, and go nuts with the armor, announcing that as Overseer, he is formally increasing the project's weight limit from 300 to 700 kilos, and telling him that the next iteration of the frame will not be counted against the Project's budget. He then promises to reimburse Siarka personally to make whatever the General comes up with. Finally, he unites the General and Chairwoman by stating their task is to come up with a machine powerful enough not just to bridge the Aura Gap, but to do so no matter how encumbered it is by an inadequate user.

6) In the First moment of sisterly protectiveness that she has felt for Whitley in about eight years (they have not even spoken since she started at the Academy), Winter decides that she is going to have words with the Overseer, Galanthus is going to help too. Only for her to be intercepted by Adler, Lowenhardt's personal attorney. Adler states that Winter has accomplished her mission and is to return to Atlas for debrief. The general draws his Saw-Cleaver and makes it an order. Things look like they're about to pop off when Whitley asks Winter why she's so insistent on being by his side now when they have ostensibly not meant anything to each other for nearly a decade. This is what breaks Winter and causes her to run off. Much to the Overseer's amusement and Whitley's own confusion.

7) Ending uncertain. Winter most likely decides that she wants to reconcile with her brother, but is at a loss where to even begin.

8) Continuation also uncertain

All told, that would probably be another 3.4 - 4.9k word snippet in and of itself.

---

Well damn, 6k words already and it is not even complete. This ever-growing tumbleweed here is the explanation of my lack of recent posting. I wanted to write for my Cyborg-Whitley idea just how Winter found out that her brother had been blown up by the White Fang and used as the test pilot for a government program to restore wounded soldiers to action. Jacques wouldn't tell her, obviously, and Willow would have been too drunk to even leave her wing of the Schnee manor - so nothing unusual there. I could be wrong, and this whole series of interactions could be avoided if Ironwood just mentions that General Amzel is doing everything he can for her brother, and Winter finds out that way, which eliminates the need for the twist reveal. And possibly the whole altercation. Lowenhardt, you can guess who he's based off of, is a bastard. And he's just doing this to gauge the emotional responsive capacities of Winter and Whitley.

I think I know, mostly, what I am doing wrong but I do not want to destroy all of my progress (even if I admit it was in the wrong direction). So I figure the best way to make up to you guys is to give you a look under the hood at what a Count piece looks like under construction. And to promise that I am not giving up. I will probably come back to this piece when my muse isn't fighting me and making me feel tired for every word I type.

I wanted to introduce a lot of things here. The Jotun Complex - that's going to be coming out as an Original Concept: Do Steal soon, I assure you. Along with Amzel, Siarka, and Lowenhardt, who are the power players involved with this project.

So that is that.

Also, feel free to give me your thoughts and your input on any mistakes you think I missed or haven't sufficiently addressed.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Kermit: makes his terrified yelling sounds "JAUNE!!!! Help me!!! I had several guests lined up for tonight, and they all cancelled on me last minute! I need something!"

Jaune: "Ah, uncle Kermit, don't worry about it. You always made me laugh when I was a kid. The least I can do is help you out. Hey everyone, you all interested in performing for a variety show?"

Everyone: "YEAH!"

Fozzie: "Hey Jauney!!!! How about you join your favorite bear for some stand up! Waka Waka!"

Kermit: "Um, Fozzie, maybe not. After all I don't want to umm...strain your talent with two of you up there. Besides, maybe Jaune would like to play some guitar? I hear you've been practicing Jaune?"

Jaune: "Yes, a lot. But I'm better at dancing."

Weiss: "Ummm...maybe Jaune and I could do a dance number together? I could use my semblance in place of special effects if that helps..." tsundere blushing "Not that I'm interested in anything but dancing!"

Jaune: "Um, of course!"

Yang: "I'll handle it! I'm very good at dancing and numbers! Hey Stud-You plus me equals good times~!"

Weiss: "Hey there, I suggested it first, besides I'm way more graceful than you!!"

Yang: "Please! I'm a lot more fun to watch and dance with!"

Weiss: "I can put on something AWE-inspiring!"

Yang: "You can put on something that will bore everyone to death!'

Weiss: "Please, your performance would be so low-brow, it'd be hitting the floor!"

Ms. Piggie: "Ladies ladies!!! There's no reason to fight over Jauney boy here. We have plenty of time and I'm sure Kermie here can schedule two dance numbers, isnt' that right Kermie?"

Kermit: "Ah, sorry, but Pyrrha got ahead of you both and she's doing a dance number with Jaune."

Weiss & Yang: "WHAT!?"

Pyrrha: "Oh my... Sorry~." She was not sorry

Nora: "OH! OH! OH! OH! Can I do a magic show!!! please please please!!!!"

Kermit: "Well what can you do?"

Nora: "Rennie! The Electric Eels!"

Ren: "Here you are."

Ren: sighs as he wheels in an aquarium with two giant eels

Nora: reaches in, and grabs both eels "And she said...let there be LIGHT!!!!" *eels zap Nora, causing her to buzz, but also glow brightly.

Kermit: "... I'd love to book you Nora, but uh, Gonzo did that act last week."

Nora: sad puppy noises "But I worked so hard on that trick..."

Gonzo: "I know what we could add in! How about... Quoting the Declaration of Indepndence while doing that act on an electric motorbike?"

Nora: "Can I power the electric motorbike?!"

Ren: "Nora, no!"

Gonzo: "NORA, YES!"

Nora: "NORA, YES!"

Kermit: *sigh* "Not easy being green..."

Ren: "Tell me about it."

 

[AndrewJTalon]

In the cozy, slightly cluttered common room of Team RWBY's dorm at Beacon Academy, the air was thick with the kind of conversation that could only happen among friends who'd seen too much and questioned even more. Blake Belladonna sat cross-legged on the couch, her amber eyes distant, a shudder running through her as she clutched a mug of tea. Ruby, Weiss, and Yang leaned in, their expressions a mix of curiosity and apprehension, sensing a story that was bound to be… unusual.

"You know," Blake began, her voice low, "among the many other reasons I broke up with Adam… I saw his diary."

Weiss raised a delicate eyebrow, intrigued. "Oh?"

Blake nodded, her face contorting as if she'd tasted something foul. "Yes… It was…" She shuddered again, her ears flattening. "Horrendous. Twisted… Even by my standards!"

Yang's protective instincts kicked in, and she clapped her hands over Ruby's ears. "What? What did he want to do with you?"

Ruby squirmed, indignant. "HEY! I WANNA HEAR!"

"No!" Yang said, her voice firm but wavering. "Actually, maybe we shouldn't even get into this—"

Blake's voice dropped to a haunted whisper, ignoring the interruption. "He wanted… T-To love and respect and cherish me!"

Weiss, Yang, and Ruby froze, their faces blank. "…Wut?" they said in unison.

Blake nodded gravely, her eyes wide with horror. "He wanted me to be his… His equal! He wanted me to be his queen, and to be my knight!"

Weiss blinked, her voice flat. "…Huh?"

Blake shuddered again, clutching her mug tighter. "And… And to give me children! Lots of them! He had names picked out!"

Ruby tilted her head, confused. "Um… But he would, like… Make you a slave or something, right?"

"NO!" Blake said, her voice rising in dismay. "He wanted me to live by his side as I chose! And be…" She made a face, as if the word tasted like ash. "Monogamous! Married!"

Weiss's expression was deadpan, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "The horror."

"It gets worse!" Blake said, her voice trembling. "He would be tender, warm, loving… And vanilla! With long romantic walks on the beach!"

Yang's brow furrowed, her hands dropping from Ruby's ears. "Um… While he smacked you around for disobeying him or something, right?"

"NO!" Blake wailed, throwing her hands up. "He didn't have anything like that! Or spanking! Or whips or chains or anything like that! He wasn't even going to put a collar on me! He thought that would be…" She shuddered violently. "SEXIST!"

Ruby's confusion deepened, her silver eyes wide. "So… He wanted to basically make you happy?"

"UGH!" Blake groaned, slumping back. "He didn't listen to a single thing I wanted from him! Or read any of my erotica! I left it in our room! Open! And yet he never even knew I wanted him to pick them up and read them! Who does he think he is?! He should have treated me like his—his pet. Made me submit! But nooo, he just wanted to be 'happily married' and 'respectful of my feelings' and 'build a happy family with me.' What a jerk!"

Yang stared, her jaw slack, then shook her head. "…But he still wants to massacre all humans, right?"

"Oh, yes, absolutely he wants that!" Blake said, nodding vigorously. "But this just put me over the edge!"

Yang stood, her voice flat. "…I'm gonna go hang out with Nora. I need some sanity in my life." She turned and strode out, her boots echoing in the stunned silence.

Weiss, recovering, leaned forward, her voice cautious but curious. "…So he's single now?"

Ruby's eyes bugged out. "WEISS!"

"What?!" Weiss said, defensive, her cheeks pink. "We could work out the whole 'kill all humans' thing!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

A fun idea: Whitley did manage to kill a Geist while doing some training with his Semblance. Nothing too strenuous, just enough to defend himself. And so he got the Geist as a summon, and he uses it to do all sorts of repairs on devices since he can have it possess objects.

Ruby: "So... You just have your little buddy do stuff?"

Whitley: "Yes. He can possess electronic devices which helps me trouble shoot them."

Ruby: "You... You think you could get into Crescent Rose?"

Whitley: "Ah... Are you sure?"

Ruby: "Y-yes... But be gentle?"

Whitley: blinks "Sure?"

Later...

Yang: "WHAT THE HELL AM I HEARING ABOUT YOU VIOLATING RUBY'S FLOWER?!"

Whitley: "NO! NONONO THAT'S NOT-THAT DIDN'T-RUBY HELP!"

Ruby: blush, holds her cheeks "Oh he was so thorough! So skilled! He did things with my Rose I've never even imagined before!"

Whitley: "STOP HELPING RUBY!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

The leadership classroom at Beacon Academy was a battlefield of a different kind, strewn with stacks of forms and the groans of beleaguered students. Coco Adel, perched on the edge of a desk with her sunglasses glinting, handed out paperwork like a drill sergeant distributing rations… On account of the fact that Simin Megister and Headmaster Ozpin had both skipped class. Again.

"And here are the WR forms for each team's monthly budget for weapon cost and upkeep," she said, slapping a thick packet into Ruby Rose's hands. "And the APC forms for allotted ammunition expenditures for each team member, yourselves included."

Ruby slumped over her desk, her silver eyes dull with despair. "Kill me."

Coco didn't miss a beat, tossing another stack her way. "And here's the Iron Bonds form for travel expenses, plus risk assessment forms for each team member, and the health forms that must be filled out before every mission."

Ruby's head hit the desk with a thud. "Kill me with a hammer."

"Oh, and here are the HTD papers for Huntsmen taxation," Coco added, dropping four more packets. "One for each kingdom."

Ruby's voice was a hollow whisper. "Do it slowly. It's the only way to make me feel alive again."

Jaune Arc, sprawled in his chair, ran a hand through his messy blond hair, his voice a mix of exasperation and disbelief. "Oh god, why do we have to do this paperwork crap? Isn't there, like, an automatic filler or something that sorts all this for us?"

Coco smirked, adjusting her beret. "Nope. If we had that, it probably would've shot itself from all the crap it has to sort through ages ago."

Cardin Winchester, slouched nearby, muttered under his breath, "Well, isn't that a tempting thought…"

Ruby lifted her head just enough to glare at the ceiling. "Oh gods, this is not what I signed up for. I came to Beacon to be a Huntress and fight bad guys, not sort through endless waves of forms and documents!"

Coco's grin was sharp as a blade. "Welcome to the reality of being a Huntress, kid. Why do you think Miss Goodwitch is so angry all the time?"

Cardin blinked, his usual scowl softening into realization. "…That actually makes a lot of sense."

Jaune nodded, grimacing. "Yeah, it certainly explains things."

Ruby's voice dropped to a mournful whisper. "Maybe this is why Mum left."

Arslan Altan, seated with her usual calm, clasped her hands and leaned forward, her voice steady but encouraging. "Come now, everyone. Jaune! Do you not recall Caspian Chapter 3, verse 9?"

Jaune's tone was flat, his eyes glazed. "'Give to the King that is the King's, and give to the Father that which is the Father's.' I know, but geez, this is a lot even for hospital paperwork."

Arslan's smile was serene. "I'm sure if we all pull together, we will get it done."

A loud snore interrupted her. Sun Wukong, slouched in his chair, was fast asleep, a half-eaten banana dangling from his hand. Arslan's elbow shot out, jabbing him awake with a yelp. "Ah! What? Is it lunchtime yet?"

Cardin snorted, leaning back. "Arslan? Thanks. You're helping to make me less prejudiced against Faunus."

Arslan inclined her head. "Thank you, Cardin."

Cardin's smirk turned pointed as he glanced at Sun. "Sun? You're also helping me, because now I realize most Faunus are just idiots."

Sun grinned, unfazed, popping the rest of the banana into his mouth. "Am not! I'm just carefree and too cool for school!"

Ruby groaned, slamming her forehead against the desk again. "Nobody says that kind of junk but dorks and my dad!"

Jaune tilted his head, a small smile tugging at his lips. "I dunno, I kind of like it."

Ruby's glare was instant. "Point proven!"

Jaune flinched. "Hey!"

Cinder Fall, who had been quietly observing from the corner, spoke up, her voice smooth as silk. "It really isn't that much work, once you know how to do it."

Jaune's eyes narrowed, a sly grin creeping across his face. "You snuck in pre-done paperwork."

Cinder's composure cracked, her amber eyes widening as she flushed. "Wha—How—?!"

Cardin chuckled, his voice low. "Don't bullshit a bullshitter."

Jaune coughed.

Coco's grin turned predatory, her sunglasses glinting. "But we'll cheerfully keep it quiet if you share how you did it."

Arslan's brow furrowed, her tone stern. "You know that would be highly unethical."

Ruby turned to her, unleashing her infamous puppy-dog eyes, her voice pleading. "Arslan…"

Arslan held firm for a moment, then sighed, her resolve crumbling. "…However, it would be prudent. As long as we learn how to do it properly."

Coco laughed, clapping her hands. "Wow, flexible ethics on you, Nun Girl!"

Arslan's lips twitched, her voice dry. "Hardly. But one can't take everything in the Good Book literally, because it was made by mortal hands, and thus prone to flaw and failure."

Coco's eyebrows shot up. "That sounds like a very easy way to make loopholes that work for you."

"Yes," Arslan admitted, her smile faint but sharp. "Yes, it is."

Coco leaned back, smirking. "I should read more religious texts, huh?"

Arslan sighed, shaking her head.

Sun, now fully awake, leaned forward, his tail flicking. "So, what's your method, Cinder?"

Cinder hesitated, then shrugged, her voice cool but resigned. "…I had my team fill out all the paperwork beforehand and got copies of it from our Headmaster before we came. It's standard paperwork for Hunters, after all. Nothing nefarious about it."

Coco groaned, then burst into laughter. "Of course! That's what I've been doing!"

Cardin's jaw dropped, his voice rising. "Seriously?! And you didn't share?!"

Coco winked, her grin unrepentant. "You didn't ask~!"

Jaune groaned, slumping in his chair. "I hate you so much."

Cardin nodded, his scowl deepening. "So much."

Ruby's head hit the desk again, her voice muffled. "That won't work for my team! Not unless Roman Torchwick or the White Fang are threatening to blow up something if we don't get it done!"

Sun leaned back, popping another banana into his mouth with a carefree grin. "Eh, I find the best approach is to just leave the paperwork to the responsible members of my team! And not stress too much about it."

Ruby's glare could have melted steel. "…Cardin? I'm starting to think you were right about some Faunus."

Cardin smirked, leaning forward. "See? I'm judging based on character, not them being animals!"

Coco's grin turned wicked. "Or how much you love your honey bunny~."

Cardin's face went beet red, his voice a strangled shout. "SH-SHUT UP! I NEVER CALLED HER THAT!"

Jaune's smirk was gentle but teasing. "Aw, that's really sweet, Cardin."

Ruby giggled, her despair momentarily forgotten. "Super sweet~!"

Arslan's smile was warm, her voice sincere. "I'm so glad you two are getting along so well, Cardin. I'm truly happy for you."

Sun, munching on his banana, shrugged. "Eh, cat girls are hotter."

Cardin's glare was murderous. "I hate you all. So much…"

Cinder, watching the chaos unfold, let a faint, sinister smile curl her lips, her thoughts dark.

Destroying this place will be easier than I thought…

(Naturally written with some help from Titanmaster_117. Thank you again!)

 

[AndrewJTalon]

A much darker idea: A discussion on my Discord was thinking about a Future!Weiss or Winter coming back in time, and among their Summons was a Rusted Knight!Jaune. How much of their soul would be left is a big question: If it would just be a mindless construct, or if some part of their consciousness would remain.

Well! Rather than another tired White Rose take on it (Seriously, that pairing would be nearly as bad as Bumblebee)... Have a Future!Whitley come back... With a Ruby summon.

This Whitley is older, battle worn, the sole survivor of a terrible future. All he has left... Is the summon of the woman he loved. A woman... Who asked him to kill her.

Ruby: "Use my power... It's the only way you can save everyone..."

Whitley stood over the dying woman... The light of his life... Tears running down his cheek as she lay in a pool of her own blood. He shakily held up his sword.

Ruby: Small smile "Whitley... I'll always be there with you..."

Whitley: "... I... I love..." He can't speak

Ruby: "... It's okay... I know... I love you too... Please, Whitley."

He bows his head to try and hide his tears... And he thrusts into her heart.

He shudders, feeling the Aura and his Semblance react. He stands up, and burns the body with a blast of Fire Dust. He would not let anyone take her body for a trophy.

Grimm Griffins land around them, snarling. Whitley turned around, his face shadowed. He summons a Glyph... And a ghostly Ruby appears, swinging her scythe, her Silver Eyes glowing.

Whitley: "... There's one significant difference between her and me... She was the nice one. I'm not."

They charged into battle.

 

[CountvonBarnOwl]

Count should probably explain what the ICE Dragon project is. Because the the ICE Dragon unit is key to understanding my Cyber Whitley concept, the AU, and all of the characters and places that I may introduce.

My principal sources of inspiration (pronounced: the shit that I am ripping off and tossing into a blender) here are Cyberpunk and Metal Gear, but there will be secondary references to Killzone, Halo, Helldivers, and maybe Ace Combat.

To recap, Cyber-Whitley is Count's attempt at exploring a Whitley that is forced to get his hands dirty. A White Fang rocket attack on a Schnee limousine leaves Whitley as little more than burnt burger meat. Jacques (pronounced: Jack-Ass) Schnee decides that he doesn't feel like paying for his son's prosthetics. This takes place around White Trailer (so on Weiss' farewell tour) so she's still the front runner for company heir. Jacques makes some very unguarded remarks about what will happen to the army's Dust supply if they don't eat the cost. (The reason that the Security Directorate doesn't beat the shit out of him is that the Council could always use an excuse to hamstring Ironwood, and Jacques' recklessness - though catalogued for later - will not be acted upon, and somebody very high up runs interference for him.)

To that end, the 3% of Whitley's body that isn't charcoal is given into the care of Lieutenant General Henryk Amzel, commander of the Advanced Project Research Army Division, or APRAD, currently designated as the 9th Division for administrative purposes.

Amzel - being an Edward Richtofen expy - is a deranged maniac who seems to be a whole bunch of stereotypes about Solitan scientists rolled into one. He's a Lieutenant General, and somehow he has his medical doctorate (he actually used to serve as a medical officer in the airborne troops before transferring to the R&D Corps to escape a scandal), as well as doctorates, in electrical engineering and physics. His weapon of choice is a heavy, thick folding saw-toothed cleaver that in his hand looks more like a tool to reprimand his test subjects than a weapon to kill things that fight back - although he is surprisingly able to do both. Of course, even his knowledge has its gaps. To that end, the Chairwoman of a company considered reliable enough by the state was brought in, in the way that military contractor companies and their designers are. Siarka Stark, Chairwoman and Chief Designer of Stark Arms, has been brought on and told to make Amzel's vision happen. She's the pragmatist to Amzel's visionary, and the reason why the ICE Dragon system is so rugged and durable. She's also willing to go along with Amzel from time to time, being a bit of a mad scientist herself. Not nearly to Amzel's extent, but all of the traits are there. Her philosophy on design is best shown in her products, such as the SkA-52. A high capacity, compact, high rate of fire, modular, multi-caliber rifle that continues to perform reliably whether the atmosphere is choked with spores, ash, sand, or snow.

Where Amzel wants to replace the ICE Dragon's MCFC reactor core with one that runs on heat captured by the decay of ultra-heavy metals (which if mixed with Gravity Dust, Amzel believes would generate the means for the people of Remnant to alter the fabric of reality, thankfully, few people take his ravings too seriously on this subject), Siarka is more the type to talk him into equipping the Dragon with novel systems and his own spin on technologies already emerging.

The representative of the State is the Overseer, Kirk Lowenhardt, a computer scientist given override authority to make sure that Amzel isn't overspending and Stark is not overbilling. However, if Lowenhardt likes to run roughshod over any project that he is given command of and he has an uncanny skill for turning people against each other. He'll get a floundering project to meet its goals, usually on time. But his idea of testing often leaves everybody else involved wanting to kill each other, and him. He's not one of Salem's but you would be forgiven for thinking he was.

---

Now that we have the players, we can get to the project itself.

The Infantry Cybernetic Exoframe has gone through a few models and iterations thus far, and multiple iterations have already grown out of it. Starting from the base ICE Dragon unit, the ICE Dragon alpha. Image for reference. It is easier to show what I am driving at than to write a whole paragraph or three describing it.

Spoiler: In hindsight, this is what I should have had Winter fight in my last Snippet

It would look something like this. I'd change the color scheme to something more Atlas Army standard of course, But you've got everything you need. Except the jaw would be distinctly less human, it serves as the housing for the radar. The visor is not two panels like MGR Raiden or what Whitley's visor will be upgraded to in subsequent iterations. Instead, a second set of eyes with compound cameras swing over the eyes in his skull, the modules synchronize, and Whitley goes from merely seeing in higher resolution, for greater distances, and so on, to getting the AR live feed that lets him see in visible light, infrared, thermal, and everything else all at once. The color-distorted face plate in this iteration is more a ballistic shield for his sensitive bits than evertything else, but it is darkly tinted enough that you can't pick out his features looking at him straight on. I didn't include any hair on mine because I was unsure of how that would effect the skull housing mounted sonar array.

Developed concurrently was a smaller, more discreet, lower profile body intended for day-to-day use. This body contains many of the sensory packages of the larger models, and similar speed, but inferior strength (as only so many CNT fiber muscles can be fit into a Whitley-sized body) and far less armor (because he's 5'3" and not 8'1"). In fact, the only tip-offs in this form come from metal detectors, the internal lighting of his eyes, and the fact that even in this body, he weighs about 130 kilos. Basically, he's like 9S wearing a white uniform instead of a black one. Interestingly, Whitley Schnee and 9S are the same height. Although I think in this body, Ruby would definitely be more into it if he went with a more 9S hairstyle.

The ICE Dragon beta, developed from the ICE Dragon alpha's failure in test runs against an actual Specialist Officer. Here's the eight foot tall abomination that I depict Winter as fighting in my snippet, but now I realize I want to be Amzel and Siarka's answer to Whitley's loss.

Spoiler: And now for the part where you all realize that Count is a hack.

This is a turnaround of Adam Smasher in Cyberpunk 2077, seen here wearing his custom IEC Dragoon frame. The Dragoon is where I got the Dragon's name, specs, and most of its abilities and on board weapons. I basically added an extra missile pod, swapped Adam's dual .50 BMG pop-up auto-pistols (which he can replace with a pair of AGLs on the tabletop) in his wrists for 12.7x55s in Whitley's, (but don't worry, I have a post-Vytal Festival upgrade idea). Kept the sensory booms that stick out of the sides of the head on the factory-issue Dragoons, (because Blake raging at Whitley for racism or cultural appropriation or some similar contrived horseshit because he's got two antennae sticking out of his head sounded funny to me), and added an MGR Raiden ballistic visor.

By the time the beta version rolled out, Amzel and Stark had scrapped the eyes-with-layover design completely, and just put the high power compound optic into Cyber-Whitley's skull casing directly.

There's a picture floating around of how to differentiate the Schnees by appearance, Winter with Black hair, Whitley with his father's eyes and jaw, Weiss looking like a carbon copy of her mother... I imagine seeing Whitley, eight feet tall though he is, with only the features that he inherited from his mother, even if it is artificial skin over armor, would give Weiss and Winter quite a start.

The only other aspect of note is my ICE Dragon's High Mobility Feet. They're like Raiden's high heel-looking configuration, with a pair of retractable spikes (such as on Metal Gear Rex) sticking out from the shins at both sides of the foot. This enables the ICE Dragon to functionally have the knockdown resistance of Elm's Semblance without the downsides, and if not run up sheer ice/rock walls, then walk up them at a good speed with his weapons free.

Editor von BarnOwl here, another thing about the High Mobility Feet and another reason why I specifically went with Raiden's high heel thing, is so Whitley can wield his weapons with his feet, much like Raiden.

So, onto the weapons themselves.

As Cyber Whitley is basically 70% Adam Smasher and 30% Raiden when he isn't in his 9S frame, his primary weapons is basically all of Adam's Cyberpunk 2020 weapons put together into one mechashift abomination. This is Hagelsturm - German for Hailstorm.

Spoiler: Again, from 2020.

Behold the Tsunami Arms Helix, a gatling auto-shotgun with a fire rate comparable to an MG42. However, that's not Adam's only shotgun, and it is only a 10-gauger. He has a 4-gauge shotgun that can mount a heat ray, AGL, flamethrower, or rocket launcher like a rifle mounts a grenade launcher. I just sort of ran with this concept and bulked up Hagelsturm to 4 gauge and gave it an outboard facing side mount in my head, like Scorch's GL, but on the right side, as opposed to the left.

Spoiler: Republic Commando was a great game.

As for what it transforms into, a rocket hammer. Like the Grav Hammer in Halo, like the rocket hammer in Alita, like Adam's hyper hammer that I do not think he has in 2077, and like Elm's too I think. But I went and made Whitley's unique. Because I have not forgotten about Metal Gear, and because there are probably a lot of moving parts in the motor that drives the spinning shotgun, this is the head that I came up with. The spinning, grinding effect, I think probably chews through Aura.

Spoiler: So if I say tricone, or mining drill, picture this on a rocket motor.

His sidearm, Panzerstecher - German for Armor Piercer, is an Ikakalaka designed not dissimilarly to the Youtuber Skallagrim's functional Ikakalaka. Which is just Armor Slayer from Fire Emblem. But because Metal Gear cyborg, and cyborgs generally, it is also an HF sword.

Spoiler: An Ikakalaka optimized for practical combat.

Video link should be here

And it transforms into an anti-material pistol like this

Spoiler: I admit I had a hard time settling on a pistol I liked and Talon had to help me.

At 16.9 inches/ 43 cm long and 5.44 kilos, it is a big boy. Which is fitting, because you need a lot of mass not just to manage recoil (which isn't much of a problem for machines) to get all of the metal that can get up to the size, and hold up to the high frequency oscillations of its sword form. Chambered in the Atlas equivalent of 50 BMG, initially, but because Whiter Rose is a thing, Whitley will be designing a personal, and absolutely massive cartridge to wow Ruby by the time she sees him again in the Atlas Arc (I settled on a 230 to 240 gram 17.8x115, so muzzle energy comparable to a 25x137 or a 30x173 AP round depending on what velocity I settle on. The gun itself will be properly elongated so its sword-form is a proper two-hander, and I will sci-fi my way to a muzzle velocity). He's got the body of a killing machine but the brain of a teenager, and he's lucky that Ruby's idea of either the perfect boyfriend, or male beauty standards, or both, probably does specifically call for multiple large caliber pop-out weapons.

One last thing. One of the many benefits of being a cyborg is that you can rotate and vibrate every joint at high speed. In Battle Angel Alita this gave us Panzer Kunst (German: Armored Arts) which went on to inspire Cyberpunk's Panzerfaust (Armor Fist). And they work the same way. You need to be a fullborg to do it. You spin to build momentum while simultaneously vibrating to channel vibrations and ignore armor (and in Whitley's case, deplete Aura).




One last thing. The final development of the project, the one I haven't touched on yet, because this is just a half-formed idea.

Now with what has already been set out, what with what has been written here with the likes of General Hardy, the 1k society, the planned war with Menagerie and possibly other places, and Remnant plunging back into conflict, I wondered, how would Amzel and Siarka future-proof their program. Simple. Build a plug-in.

In Cyberpunk there are things called ACPAs - Assisted Combat Personal Armor, or simply power armor. It is a bigger mech (3-5 meters, think kind of like a Knightmare Frame in Code Geass) that you have a character pilot. One of which is the DaiOni, which because of its wiring, lack of life support, and ultra-intense sensory package and everything else, can only be piloted by a fullborg.

So I've kind of come up with the ICE Dragon APC (Amphibious Powered Cavalry) Unit.

You plug an ICE Dragon (either Whitley in the prototype/test bed, or some other very wounded Atlas soldier that has undergone full conversion once the ICE Dragon - Serial hits full production) into a larger walker (maybe a 4 meter class, maybe a 20 meter class), and send him on his merry way. I'm imagining a sort of squadron of heavily armed walkers purpose-built to kill Hunters-level opponents and things like themselves acting as the spearhead of Atlas' military interventions.

I hope this sheds a little light on the vision that I saw in the absolute trainwreck previous, and sets up so I can kind of start cranking out more with this idea.

 

[SharkCultist]

Got this fun little bit stuck in my head.


Adam: any last words before I kill you?

Yang: why are your horns black?

Adam:....what?

Yang: why are they black? I mean bull horns are usually bone colored right? And even if they did have some black it wouldn't be completely solid like that.

Adam:....

Yang: oh my God do you paint your horns?

Adam: No!

Yang: you totally do!

Adam: shut up!

Yang: but why? I mean the sheer amount of nail polish and time that has to take.

Adam: the white didn't fit my color scheme.

Yang: oh but the Grimm mask is ok.

Adam:....

*Cuts yangs arm off*

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Team AARN is best described as... Well... They had Team 7 Wave Country Mission Syndrome. STRQ had it to a point as well (They're the parents of the protagonists after all) but Team AARN's tended to get much more chaotic.

Ozpin: "So... Your mission was to rescue a lost boy from a village..."

Isabel: "And it turned into a battle for the fate of the valley when the local warlord found a Pre-Moonshatter device that turned him into a raging Grimm monster."

Ozpin's assistant, a Miss Cellaneous, is staring in disbelief.

Nick: "I cut him in half when the local priestess let us transfer Saia's energy blast into my sword with her Semblance!"

Arjun: "Yes, but my arrow strikes opened up the hole for you to hit him."

Isabel: "That wouldn't have happened at all without my expert leadership!" A pause. "Also the ancient temple of doom was destroyed, which is a real shame."

Nick: "Yeah, uh, I kind of cut it in half."

Isabel: "Sooo... What is our next mission?"

Cellaneous: "... You're going to guard some bridge builders. Just a nice, easy escort mission."

Isabel: "Good! We could use a break!"

And later...

Isabel: "Sooo... The mercenary group ISIS tried to summon a Super-Grimm to unleash upon South Vale but we managed to kill it."

Nick: "There was a prophecy about it and everything!" grins

Arjun: "Yes, which I clearly fulfilled."

Nick: "Nuh uh! I was clearly the one!"

Arjun: "No! I was!"

Saia: "Technically any of us could have fit the role, but we only defeated it with the power of friendship!"

Isabel: "Also hitting it really, really hard."

Saia: "That too!"

Ozpin: "... I see." sips his coffee "Well! Good job!"

Cellaneous: frazzled "O-Okay! Okay! Here's... A very simple mission! You just deliver this package to Count Testoasa in Hispania! He's a respected noble! Absolutely nothing strange or death defying!"

Isabel: "Good! Honestly, all these missions are just crazy!"

Nick: "I thought they were fun!"

Isabel: "You would, idiot..."

They leave. Cellaneous looks over at Ozpin.

Cellaneous: "I-I'm sure this is just a bit of bad luck... Right?"

Ozpin: "Of course! Third time's the charm!"

Some more time later...

Cellaneous: "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DESTROYED THE COUNT"S CASTLE AND KILLED HIM?!"

Isabel: "He had addicted his people to drugs and was threatening to kill them all if I didn't marry him and help him make better drugs!"

Nick: "Yeah! Also we cut his castle in half... Again."

Arjun: "Only after I blew up the foundation."

Nick: "Saia didn't need that to cut it in half! Though I did help her by swinging her like a sword!"

Saia: "D-Don't remind me, I'm still woozy."

Arjun: "Yes, about that... Did he touch you inappropriately?"

Saia: "My Prince, of course not!"

Nick: "How could you say that?! I only want to touch Izzy inappropriately!"

Isabel: "IDIOT!" Bonks Nick on the head, blushing

Nick: "OW! That's what you said!"

Ozpin: "Hm... Perhaps I should have named your team ARSN-Arson."

Nick: "That's not a color though!"

Ozpin: "Good point. Well... You did stop the drug trade and freed the city so I'm going to call this mission a success. Now, for your next assignment-"

Cellaneous: "AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

Miss Celleneaous took an early retirement after this.

 

[AndrewJTalon]

Pyrrha was doing some training on her own in the training field, contemplating things... Mainly Jaune...

Morgan: "Ooooh... You want to make babies with Jaunnne~... You want to convince him to become my Dark Knight, oooohhh~!'

Pyrrha: "Um... Sorry, but that's not very convincing."

Morgan emerges from a bush with a scowl.

Morgan: "Come on! I could push him to go out with you, you know~!"

Pyrrha: bright red "St-Still no! Besides... My aunt's been pushing on that too!"

Morgan: "Uh huh, and has anything happened?"

Pyrrha: frustrated noise "... He is pretending nothing has happened. Given he has to sell the illusion that he's engaged to multiple girls, I understand that..."

Morgan: "But you want to change that, don't you~?"

Pyrrha: "W-Well..."

Morgan: "Come now... There's no need to hide it. You want my stupid great-nephew all to yourself, don't you?"

Pyrrha: "I-I, um... W-Well... Maybe..."

Morgan: "Yessss... Come on! I can make all your dreams come true~!"

Pyrrha: "I mean... You'd be more convincing if I didn't know you were single and had an OnlyFans-"

Morgan: "I'M GOING THROUGH A ROUGH SPOT!"

Pyrrha: "Also the rest of your family doesn't like you."

Morgan: "Artoria was always like that! Taking things that are mine, like my toys or my music tapes or my throne!"

Pyrrha: "Would you even be a good monarch?"

Morgan: "Being good at ruling isn't important! What's important is being able to have a harem of hot hunks and to get cake whenever you want! That's what being a Queen is all about!"

Pyrrha: "I-I don't need a harem!"

Morgan: "Okay, so let Jaune have the harem and you be first wife!"

Pyrrha: bright red "W-Well... Um..."

Morgan: "WHILE YOU HELP ME TAKE OVER THE WORLD!"

Pyrrha: Long pause "NO! ABSOLUTELY NOT!"

Morgan: "Come onnnn! Haven't you ever wanted to be the bad girl? The naughty girl?"

Pyrrha: "ONLY FOR JAUNE!"

 

[AndrewJTalon]

With Isabel...

Morgan: "Help me take over the world!"

Isabel: sigh "Same answer as last time, Great-Auntie: No. Maybe if you just made up with your husband-"

Morgan: "NO!"

Isabel: "Will you just think about the consequences of your actions?!"

Morgan: "NEVER!"

With Nick...

Morgan: "Be my Black Knight, and together we will rule the world!"

Nick: "Nah. Izzy would get mad."

Morgan: "Wha-Don't you have any greater ambitions than being a husband and father?!"

Nick: "What greater things to be are there than that?"

Morgan: "Being a great warrior?!"

Nick: "I already am! Boy, you're really bad at convincing people to work for you! I guess that's why Nana was the Queen and you weren't, hahaha!"

Morgan: "... How did the idiot destroy me so utterly...?!"

With Tangy...

Morgan: "Tangy... Dear... Don't you want to help Auntie take over the world?"

Tangy: "I want to be rich and prosperous, ruling the world is for suckers."

Morgan: "Why not seize things to make yourself rich?"

Tangy: rolls her eyes "That's the economics of a mentally retarded child, Auntie. Even communists don't believe in their economics, they just want to seize power and wealth while being praised for it."

Morgan: "What's communism?"

Tangy: "Another reason you shouldn't be ruling anything."

Morgan: "ARGH!"