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SHINOBI: The RPG - New Game

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The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by...
Chapter 1: Character Creation

Fulcon

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The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *

I don't know how long it's been.

It was early in the morning. I was driving to work before the sun had even come up. Took my eyes off the road for one second to wipe them and when I looked back up, there was this pickup truck with red paint right in my way.

Don't quite know what happened next or how I wound up here. I vaguely remember some kind of argument? Though I don't know who I would be arguing with or what we'd be debating about after a fiery car crash.

But I do know I wasn't supposed to die. Not that young.

I feel oddly betrayed.

It doesn't matter now. I've been floating in this warm, dark abyss for a long time now. Occasionally, I get light shining through the walls, but the walls looked fleshy for some reason. So am I in an egg? How did I get in an egg?

Those glimpses gave me a chance to look at my body. For some reason, my hands are all stubby. Like instead of a real person, someone decided to remake my body out of beef franks covered in skin. Downright unsettling. At least it would be if I had the energy to just think about my problems for a single moment, but everything felt hazy.

Really hazy.

Like the last time I was on meds, hazy.

I didn't like it.

The only thing in this thing is the cable.

The cable perplexed me, just like everything else about my situation did. I couldn't tell if the thing was symbolic or what, but it was attached to my bellybutton and I couldn't get it off. Really annoying since it tended to get tangled around my limbs and I could barely move worth anything to get myself untangled.

The only good thing about it is that it's supplying me air, so I don't have to breathe. I don't know how it's doing that, we're underwater.

I think it has gills.

Which means that I have gills.

If I have gills, I don't need it.

So lets try to get rid of it and actually use my lungs and stuff. It'll feel really good to actually inhale and this thing won't let me inhale!

Come on...move!

Move!

Get off!

It's really stuck in there.

Now I'm upset.

Who put this here? It's a health hazard! One of these days I'm going to drift off to sleep and it's going to wrap around my neck and strangle me! I don't want to die twice!

Dying sucked!

At that point, I nearly had a heart attack as my first real intellectual stimulation in centuries arrived!

Welcome to SHINOBI: The RPG, a game set in the shadowy, sinister world of the Naruto manga! Fight challenging enemies, cast jutsu and work toward a brighter future in this Alternate Reality Ninja life-simulator.

The words came in an emerald box, that just...floated there. Like, not even floating in the abyssal fluid, because if it was doing that, it would started turning and changing with the current and I could grab it and see if it tasted like cabbage.

I was curious.

Then the windows changed.

Please select your gender: Male/Female.

I picked male because I saw nothing wrong with remaining as such.

Customize appearance?

Nah, I already looked amazing.

Please Enter Your Name.

The window gave me two empty text boxes, the first labeled 'surname' and the second labeled 'given name'. I appreciated the clarification, because I was going to put my first name in the first box and my last name in the second box and that would've been backwards! Next to the text boxes were two buttons saying 'random'.

So I'm going to be playing a Naruto RPG, which I'm really not sure how I'm going to play without a keyboard and mouse but I'm sure it'll show up somehow in my black abyss. Back on topic, I need something that sounds suitably Japanese-y. Uh...Naruto? No, that's the name of the main character. Idiot.

Ash? No, no. That's the English rename of dubbed anime. I don't know his Japanese name...heh, I remember watching that show as a kid. They had a bunch of rice balls arranged on a picnic blanket and called them donuts. Those were the weirdest donuts that I'd ever seen in my life.

Okay, uh...actually, speaking of renames, Digimon did that too. And I remember my favorite character from that entire series was Davis. I don't know, I just thought Veemon and his digi-eggs were the coolest thing ever, especially Raidramon. Plus, the guy chose of his own free will to get eaten by a giant monster to save all his friends, so he was just awesome.

The reason I'm talking about this is that Davis was renamed for the dub too; his original name was Daisuke.

So that's going to be my first name. Daisuke.

I thought it really hard and the name filled into the text box.

For my family name...I'm just going to hit random a bunch of times since I don't care that much. Miyamoto, Yamada, Yamato, Bucktoothed, butt faced, baby eating O'brian?

I'm kidding.

Bonus points if you get the reference.

...and I don't remember.

Wait, I don't get the bonus points from my own pointless game.

This is lame!

I kept using the random button when I finally landed one that I liked. 'Shimoda'.

Uh...yeah. That looks good.

Shimoda Daisuke. That's my name. I thought 'Accept' really hard and the window faded, taking with it the most light I've had in a long time.

It was then, that something changed.

Like a shift in the wind as I heard the sound of something weird. I couldn't place it until the walls around me started to close in and force my head toward...a tiny hole as I felt the liquid start to drain, leaving my feet up above dry.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh no.
* * *​

I don't really remember much about what happened after my...rebirth. Apparently my new birth donors didn't really want me, so I wound up in an Orphanage. From there, I went more insane than I already was because, well...I couldn't walk.

Because I'm an infant and infants can't walk. The only time I felt more frustratingly powerless is when I was a fetus but even then it wasn't constantly rubbed in my face like it is now, when I'm stuck in a crib.

But to make things even weirder, I don't need to sleep. I spent over two weeks just lying there in my crib completely awake twenty-four seven until I realized that I had to actually use the crib, like a video game character, to sleep. Then I could sleep for up to twenty four hours, so I slept all day, every day just to pass the time.

Of course, that didn't work out to well either, because when I slept for too long, people came to wake me up and take me out of my crib to...socialize. They placed us all in a play room together filled with childrens toys and I would watch the other rugrats crawl around and play or gnaw on stuff. Nothing wrong with infants and toddlers, they were adorable...but they weren't on my level.

What I really wanted was to learn how to read. You know how people, when they see a beautiful person of the opposite gender and they start ogling? That's how I was looking at that bookshelf in the corner. If I could read, I could stave off the boredomand immerse myself into this new world in a way that I actually enjoyed. This is supposed to be a game, for Pete's sake!

I mean, actually I'm a person reincarnated into the Naruto world with a video game system tacked onto him like this was a fan-fiction or something. So it made sense that I had to experience early childhood. But I sure didn't like it!

At least they used bottles. A wet nurse would be stupidly awkward.

Of course, as fun as the kids thought I was...I was able to sleep anywhere. Well, wait anywhere. In reality, I didn't get to sleep unless it was on a bed, but I could lay down on a couch and engage the Wait function, further proof that all the Bethesda's game budget went into figuring out how to break through dimensional barriers.

Personally, I thought it all went to Skyrim remasters, but boy have I been surprised!

The only difference I notice between waiting and sleeping is that I don't feel phenomenally refreshed after waiting like I do sleeping. I wonder why that is?

Another thing I noticed is that I don't have any hunger or thirst bars. Now, I don't ever feel hungry, but I wonder if that has more to do with the constant supply of formula I'm getting. If I had a manual, I could read up on this stupid game and figure everything out.

Like, is there SPECIAL stats that I need to worry about? This is clearly based on Fallout.

Oh. Wait.

What is that I spy?

That is a child's picture book, but all the other kids were ignoring it, almost like they couldn't even see it.

I crawled forward and felt my heart stop.

'You're Special!'.

It was a book made out of plastic instead of wood. On the cover was the title, written in big, black letters against colored squares. Beneath the title was a little, blonde baby Vault Boy, standing up in a baby carriage, holding a book and giving me a thumbs up. It was written in English. Blessed, merciful English!

Thank you, game!

I opened it and started reading.

S is for Strength, and that means that I am strong! I can carry lots of toys and swing stuff all day!

On the left was a graphic of the Vault boy with a herculean figure. On the right was the description with twin black arrows on either side, marked with a plus and minus. I was just smiling, so happy to have this tiny children's book in my hand that I could read.

...wait, this means that there are stats. Okay.

I began to turn the pages, reading each description happily.

P is for Perception, a long funny word! It means what I tasted, smell, saw and heard!

E is for Endurance, and that's how long I can play! I'm always really healthy and have energy all day!

C is for Charisma, it's why people think I'm great! I make my friends all laugh and smile, and never want to hate!

I is for Intelligence, it means I'm really smart! I use my brain for lots of stuff, like science, math and art!

A is for Agility, that's how I get around! I move real fast and easy, and I never make a sound!

L is for Luck, and it's simple, you see! It means that good things always happen to me!

I laughed at the last illustration, which showed a black cat getting out of the Vault Boy's way on his happy stride to wherever he was going. Then, on the last page, was Let's Review! On the left was a picture of the Vault Boy deep in a giant text book, sitting on two more. On the right were each of the SPECIAL stats arranged in order, with black arrows on either side of the numbers. All the stats were set to 5 by default and I had 5 free points to put wherever I wanted.

With a grin and smile, I went back to the beginning and read the book again. And again. Drinking in the illustrations, pondering the majesty of the rhymes within this book. I didn't want to let it go, because I had a sneaking suspicion that after I set my stats, this book would disappear from the world.

But if I kept reading the book, then someone might see me use it.

Looking around, I could see the adults still watching the kids and me. They were still talking and the kids were still playing. The world didn't pause just because I was holding this book.

So, I went to the back of the book and started allocating my stats.

In Fallout games, I always subtracted all the points from Charisma. Well, in Fallout 3 and New Vegas. Reason being that there weren't any charisma checks. In fallout 3, persuasion happened by a die roll and if you had a maxed out speech skill, that was always a 100% chance to succeed. In New Vegas, you could persuade people with an Intelligence check or a Strength Check but there were no Charisma checks. Period. For those times when you had to convince someone through raw diplomacy, you had Speech and Barter.

In Fallout 4, though, persuading people was actually directly tied to your Charisma.

But this book here is making me believe that I'm in something closer to Fallout 3, which means that Charisma is superfluous. So I took all the points I could out of Charisma, leaving it at 1 and giving me 9 free points to work with.

You know, I wonder if I could take a point out of somewhere so I can make two stats perfect 10's? I mean, I'm in Naruto and if I remember correctly from Tsunade and Sakura, physical strength can be perfectly substituted with just Chakra. So...one point out of Strength, bringing that to 4, giving me 10 whole free points to work with.

Both of those went straight to Intelligence and Luck.

Intelligence because that meant I'd get more skill points and allow me to patch the gaping hole in my social prowess that dumping Charisma left with me by leveling up Speech. Luck because I was in the world of Naruto, which if I recall correctly, had physical gods roaming around causing havoc. If I wanted to survive, I seriously needed the deck stacked in my favor and that was the best way to do it. If I ever needed money, I'd just walk into a casino and just take their money until they threw me out. Best way to pay for SPECIAL enhancing implants, which I will probably wind up finding, or making, with Chakra.

So my stats now sat at…

4 Strength.
5 Perception.
5 Endurance.
1 Charisma.
10 Intelligence.
5 Agility.
10 Luck.

Nice.

I closed the book and placed it on the floor ahead of me.

...it didn't fade away.

So I reached for it again but I blinked and the book disappeared.

Aw man…

Still, I wonder how long it'll be until I get to tag my skills.
* * *​

You cannot rest while there are enemies nearby.

Wait WHAT?!?

Are you joking me?

What is going on? This is an orphanage! I'm in a nursery for Pete's sake!

It was at that point that I heard the roar off in the distance. I remembered that it'd been about a year since I got stuck in this forsaken excuse for a game and put two and two together.

Yeah, I guess the Kyuubi had to show up sooner or later, huh? Great. The Fourth Hokage's gonna smack the fox and seal it inside Naruto and then everyone's gonna ignore the crap out of the kid because of misinformation and emotional trauma.

That's what happened in canon, right? Naruto wanted people to look up to him because he hated being ignored? I only watched the first season of the dub, so I don't know that much.

Wish I could go back to...to…

At that moment, something evil entered the room. Like a wave of crimson death, it washed over the room, painting the moonlight with blood. The presence was cloistered around me, and I felt like it wanted nothing more than to eat my very soul and destroy me utterly.

Immediately, the other infants woke up and started screaming and crying as loudly as they possibly could. It sounded like their lungs were going to run up their throat. But I was quiet, rapidly looking around the room, watching the walls, and trying to climb like a monkey over the crib walls.
I needed to get out and find help.

I needed to run, but I couldn't even jump over the crib bars.

I had to save my soul.

I had to let it out so it could run.

So I stuck my head through the bars of the crib and turned my head sideways. With my throat against the bars, I pressed in as hard as I could. In my vision, I could see an oxygen meter, usually reserved for swimming to keep track of how much air you had, appear and start ticking down.

Had to let the soul out, I didn't want to get eaten.

Don't get eaten.

Don't get eaten.

The oxygen meter ran out, and I started taking damage.

190/200 Hitpoints.

180/200 Hitpoints.

I could feel it getting closer, so I pressed harder.

160/200 Hitpoints.

140/200 Hitpoints.

Blood started to pour out of my eyes and things started to get fuzzy.

Have to get away.

Have to...get...away...

120/200 Hitpoints.

100/200 Hitpoints.

Don't get eaten.

Right as I hit half health, the door burst open and in came the Orphanage Matron. I didn't see her at first, but I heard her smash into the nursery and with a shout, she ripped the bars I was using to free myself out from the crib.

That was when I started screaming. I needed to get away, and I pushed against her, but her arms were wrapped around me like steel friggan bars and no matter how hard I tried, no matter how hard I pushed and kicked, I couldn't get out of her grasp.

I couldn't even get a look angle to continue my desperate flight from life on her arms and I noted with despair that my oxygen meter had already filled back up.

But just as suddenly as it came, the malevolent presence left and immediately I calmed down. My arms and legs went lax. The other kids were still crying, but I guess none of them were trying to commit suicide.

The Matron was singing some soft lullaby, but I couldn't fall asleep unless I were on a bed. Still, it soothed my nerves enough that I could actually breathe properly.

It was gone.

Eventually, a Shinobi, one of the Chunin on security detail here in the orphanage showed up. The Matron passed me over to him and told him to take me to the hospital. Because blood running down your cheeks is apparently cause for concern.

...well, if I'm good enough to joke, I guess I'm okay.

I don't quite understand what happened next. All I know is that I was put in a hospital bed on oxygen and left to sleep.

But I couldn't sleep.

Well, I could've.

But I didn't want to.

I curled my knees up around me and started sobbing.
* * *​

Fully healed and fully cognizant when I woke up. My head wasn't fuzzy anymore and the Doctor's were pretty surprised at that fact. I was allowed to go home the next day, mostly because they needed beds to help with the wounded in the aftermath of the attack.

I was surprised too, but this was a Bethesda game; resting heals.

The Matron kept a close eye on me since the attack, and I kept a close eye on her in turn. She did a good job at hiding them, but she slipped a couple times and I could see the large bruises on her arms.

I mean, I knew I gave her trouble, but her arms were black. Still, I owed her my life, so I did what I could to make things pleasant. Trying to convince the other kids of anything was beyond hopeless since they didn't care about words.

Still, the years went on and things were normal. I actually learned how to speak properly. Took me a bit longer than normal since my brain defaults to English but I got it. I learned how to read, too. Better than the rest of the kids, most certainly.

Was pretty difficult to get them to let me have access to the Bookshelf but once I did, I always had a book. Always.

Shame, they didn't have skill books. Did this game have skill books? It should have skill books. I always wanted to know what Lying, Congressional Style had to say about speaking to people. But I think 'You're Special!' is about as Fallout-y as the books get.

What books were available were all fiction. Feel good books that our caretakers could read to us during story time. Normally, I'd give these reads a hard pass, but when you're dying of thirst, you don't really care about quality of the water.

"Children! Gather around!"

I looked up and there was the matron and standing next to her was the friggan Hokage himself.

Dressed in his white robes and large, triangular hat, that was Sarutobi Hiruzen. Holy cow.

I joined the kids in assembly and we all bowed, like we were taught.

"Children, this is the Hokage," The Matron introduced the old man. "He's brought a new friend to join us today."

Around the Hokage, rubbing the back of his head with a giant grin on his face, was a blonde boy with whisker marks on his cheeks.

Naruto.

I remember idolizing him when I was a teenager. Well, a teenager the first time, since I'm going through it all again. But then I also remember getting bored with his show because of all the filler in the Anime and I kind of just...dropped it.

This is weird.

"Now everyone make sure you make him feel welcome," The told us all.

The Hokage looked down at Naruto like a kindly grandfather.

Ten bucks says its an act, but I can't tell.

Charisma Check Failed: Success not possible.

Never saw a Success not possible before. That's...a new one. Even in the old Fallout and Elder Scrolls games, if there was a check, it could be beaten.

Wonder what that means?

Feels like the game is cheating, though.

"Go on, Naruto-kun," Hiruzen told the blonde. "As you were, children."

We all bowed and went right back to our activities. I jumped back on one of the couches in the corner and reopened my book, a stirring read about a talking frog who fell in love with a slug and is fighting with a snake.

This place is weird sometimes.

I became aware that the chair next to me was occupied. I looked up and saw that Hokage.

"Hokage-sama," I replied politely, acutely aware that something was wrong. Because he came to speak to me directly. "How are you?"

"I'm well," Hiruzen replied, smiling gently. "What's your name?"

"Shimoda Daisuke," I replied, feeling vaguely uncomfortable with that introduction for some reason. Is it because I don't do it often?

"Nice to meet you, Shimoda-kun," Hiruzen replied with a friendly smile. "I'm told that you are a very strong little boy."

What did he just call me?

I'm not a little...ugh. Whatever.

"I didn't mean to hurt Nakazawa-sensei," I replied. "I just needed to get away."

He frowned. "You aren't in trouble. I was just wanting to meet you is all."

"Why?" I asked with a frown of my own. "No one talks to me unless they want something."

Being honest, the 1 charisma is a blessing and a curse. A blessing because it kept my contact with the kids down to an absolute minimum and a curse because it meant none of the adults really wanted to talk to me either.

"Well, that doesn't sound right," Hiruzen replied with a much more serious frown. "That goes against the Will of Fire."

I blinked. "What's the Will of Fire?"

That actually hasn't been explained to me yet, so this is cool.

"It means that the entire village is like a big family," Hiruzen answered. "And if we want the village to be strong, we all need to love and cherish each other like a big family, no matter who we are. It gives us the strength to fight against all odds, building up our strength of will and our character."

On one hand, that sounds oddly familiar. Like the concept of the human family, but much more localized. On the other hand, this sounds really cultish.

Which to be fair, that might not be a bad thing in a world like this.

"Oh, okay," I replied.

"Have you thought about becoming a Shinobi?" Hiruzen asked with a smile.

"Yeah." Why is he asking? That's the dream at this point.

"I'm glad," Hiruzen nodded. "We all could use someone strong like you defending our home."

Oh, recruitment drive.

Actually, come to think of it, where does that strength come from? My strength is 4. And I'm a kid...wait...oh. I get it.

My physical strength isn't dependent on my age, so I'm technically as strong now as I would be when I'm an adult. Packed into this tiny, five year old body of mine and wait, if that's true, why couldn't I jump over the crib bars when I was a kid?

Unless my jump height is tied to my character size and I'll need chakra or something to break that limit.

Stupid game mechanics. Making real life all buggy and stuff.

"Yeah, that makes sense," I replied with a shrug. "I just want the cool jutsu I hear people can do. Is it true that a Shinobi can cut a lightning bolt with a kunai?"

Speech Check Failure: 9/10.

Hiruzen's expression got oddly pensive. "Some can, yes."

What's his problem?

Charisma Check failed: 1/6.

Those checks have long since worn out their welcome.

"Is there something wrong?" Hiruzen asked.

"Nothing," I replied with a frown. "I'm just thinking."

"Well, I hope they're good thoughts," Hiruzen replied.

"Not really," I replied. "Just something's annoying me."

Charisma Check Failed: 1/7.

Seriously?

"I see," Hiruzen replied, standing up. "Well, I'll let you return to your book. It was nice meeting you."

"You too, Hokage-sama," I said with a bow in my seat.

He bowed back, turned and left.

I went back to my book, hiding behind it to see if I could stop anyone else from bothering me. But that plan was ruined when someone jumped up on the couch next to me, causing me to shake a little, even though our couches weren't connected.

"Hi!"

There saw Uzumaki Naruto.

"Hi."

"What's your name?"

"Shimoda Daisuke."

"Cool. Want to come play with me?"

"Maybe when I'm done with my book."

"Aw, but reading is boring," Naruto exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air like he was proclaiming the gospel truth.

I turned to him. "How old are you?"

"Four!" He announced triumphantly. "You?"

Let's try a joke. I put my book down.

"I'm five," I replied, holding up six fingers.

Charisma Check Success: 1/1.

"That's not five!" Naruto said with a laugh. "That's six!"

I put down two fingers.

"That's four!" Naruto pointed. Then he held up five fingers. "This is five!"

"Well, yeah," I said with a shrug. "I was just joking."

"Oh. Well, you want to come play Ninja with me?" Naruto asked. "Or did you really want to keep reading?"

Ah...fine. "Sure."
* * *​

Occasionally, people came into the orphanage, looking to adopt. These were anything from civilians who finally got over losing their child in the Kyuubi attack. Others were Shinobi who were looking for an apprentice to teach. But no matter who it was, none of them ever even approached me. Took one look and it's like they'd freeze for a second before pretending they didn't notice.

I didn't mind it one bit.

But Naruto was a different story.

The adults made every conceivable effort to ignore and avoid Naruto, who made repeated and more desperate efforts to get noticed by these adults and try to get adopted. Every time someone came by, Naruto seemed to get more determined and more desperate.

Not that I blamed him. Our caretakers tried to ignore him almost as much as they succeeded in ignoring me. Though I made it really easy for them to ignore me; I didn't even need to eat, I found out. Naruto, however, did not take it easy. In fact, the more he was ignored, the harder he tried to be noticed.

He never missed a meal. He was never abused and the other kids knew better than to pick on him...because if they picked on him, they'd have to deal with me.

None of them wanted to deal with me.

But I was the only one who didn't deliberately ignore him.

But I was surprised today.

Apparently an adult had come looking for adoption. While the other kids were all getting ready, making themselves presentable, I was sitting with a book in the couch. In the couch next to mine sat Naruto, who looked positively depressed.

"You aren't going to try?" I asked with a frown.

"What's the point?" Naruto muttered. "They all hate me."

That's not the Naruto I knew. The Naruto I knew never gave up and knuckled down on his goals until he either accomplished what he was trying to do or he died.

Did he have to grow into it?

He probably had to grow into that kind of bare-knuckle determination.

"Sucks," I replied with a shrug.

We looked up as the adult walked into the room.

Immediately, I got chills running down my spine.

The man had long black hair, immaculate and flowing down past his shoulders. He wore a green battle Kimono and upon locking eyes with Naruto and I, he smiled and made his way over to us. Up close, I saw that his eyes were crimson, and the scleroses were pitch black. On his robes had a floral pattern, but on closer inspection, those weren't flowers – they were scythes.

"Why hello there," He said with a friendly smile. "What's your name?"

Am I the only one who sees how creepy this guy is?

"Uzumaki Naruto!" Naruto immediately beamed, grinning like a madman.

"It's a pleasure to meet you," The stranger gave a bow. "And whose your friend?"

"C'mon, Daisuke," Naruto urged. "Don't you want to get adopted?"

No, but the matron would have my head if I were hostile to a guest. "Shimoda Daisuke. What's your name."

"Oh, I'm no one important," The stranger replied easily. "I just felt like coming to see the future of Konoha and I'm quite glad I did. I found the two most peculiar little boys I've ever seen."

I'm not a-

"What does peculiar mean?" Naruto asked.

"It means that you're quite special," He replied. "And that you're going to be making waves across the entire world."

"Yeah, I am special!" Naruto agreed, his confusion turning to happiness. "I'm going to be Hokage some day!"

"I know you are," He said with a grin that reminded me of a shark. "I will be following along with your career with great interest."

"Really? Cool!" Naruto said. "Are you going to adopt us?"

"I'm very sorry, but I actually am not in a position to adopt," The man replied apologetically.

"Aw…" Naruto frowned in crushing disappointment.

"But I did have a present for the two of you," He said, reaching into his jacket.

He's going for a gun to shoot us. No, this world doesn't have guns. Kunai. Yeah, he's going to grab a couple kunai and stab us.

The stranger pulled out a pair of small, black notebooks with a steel coil making up the spine. In those coils were a pen each.

"A notebook?" Naruto asked in confusion.

"Certainly," The stranger replied. "That way if you're feeling sad or angry, or something amazing happens to you...or if you simply want to keep track of something, these are great for that. That way, you can flip back on stuff and remember it."

"Thanks?" Naruto asked with a confused look on his face.

I opened the notebook and felt my heart stop.

On the first page was a vault boy, wearing a Shinobi hitai-ate walking forward. Engraved on the plate was the symbol of Vault-Tec and he was walking forward, animated. Near each limb was a health bar, reminding me that, yes, my limbs can be crippled.

I shut the book immediately – no one can have this. "How did you-?"

The stranger hummed then realized what I was asking. "Oh. Yes, it was going to do that the first time you got a notebook."

"Do what?" Naruto asked with great interest, surging forward and trying to take the notebook from me.

I stopped him from doing that. "Naruto, it's mine! Respect other people's property!"

This is going in my pocket and never leaving.

"But mine's boring!" Naruto whined. "It's not doing anything cool!"

I pushed him back into his seat and glared. "Naruto! No!"

He stopped and folded his arms, muttering under his breath, sniffing from being upset.

The stranger laughed and stood up. "Well, I think I've worn out my welcome and I'm afraid I must be off. It's been nice visiting with you two."

"Wait," Naruto said. "Are you going to be watching Daisuke too?"

"Oh, I've been watching Shimoda-kun," He said, getting that unsettling smile on his face again. "I've quite enjoyed the show. You two take care now."

He left and I let out the breath that I had been holding.

I don't remember him from the Anime.

"He seemed like a nice guy!" Naruto said. "I hope he comes back!"

Does he know I'm a game character?

I'm chalking that up to naivete. Shouldn't the Kyuubi be giving him super awesome bestial instincts that let him detect evil or something?

Or is that just fanon?

Who was that guy?
* * *​

I don't believe it.

It's the PIP-boy in Paper form. Not does it only have my stat screen, it has a list of all my skills.

Taijutsu (Endurance): 17/100.

Melee Weapons (Strength):15/100.

Ranged Weapons(Agility): 17/100.

Genjutsu(Perception): 17/100.

Ninjutsu(Endurance): 17/100.

Speech(Charisma): 9/100.

Barter(Charisma): 9/100.

Sneak(Agility): 17/100.

Pick Lock(Perception): 17/100.

Fuinjutsu(Intelligence): 27/100.

Medicine(Intelligence): 27/100.

Survival(Perception): 17/100.

Chakra Control(Intelligence): 27/100.

And a list of perks! I mean, I don't have any yet, but I can now officially start planning my build, which is probably going to focus a lot on survival. My survival, not the skill Survival. Which means fighting and murder in this crazed death world.

...I wonder if maybe when people start running when they're nearly beaten, if I can actually let them live instead of them getting up and then trying to murder me after showing mercy? I always hated that about Skyrim.

If that weren't enough, this incredible little book has the game manual, written into the chapter on Data, letting me actually understand this crazy world and how it all works.

Had to stop myself from leaping up on my chair and celebrating, I was reading this during play time for the kids, which meant I had my manual hidden behind the biggest book we had. I already read the thing so it's not like I look suspicious, but if I keep acting happy, people are going to know something is up.

Welcome to SHINOBI: A Naruto based Role Playing game. In this world...blah, blah blah. It keeps going, but I skipped it to focus on the more important spots, like how skill points are actually calculated.

Yeah, just like how I remember. Twice the skill's governing stat added to half my luck stat then you add two to the whole thing. How's damage calculated? Oh, it uses realistic physics. Well, that's interesting. Can you add more skills to the lineup?

No, and I didn't expect you to be able too. Fallout never let you invent skills out of nothing, why should a game inspired on it do that? That'd be stupid.

Now about Jutsu...oh, Jutsu is learned through Jutsu scrolls, books and taught by NPC's. Once I've learned the jutsu in question, I need to match it's appropriate skill and the chakra control to cast it. Need to learn the hand signs to pull of whatever it is I need. It also says that jutsu can be modified or invented, but doing so can make the jutsu cost more, especially as the modification gets more and more extensive.

Also the rules for making my own jutsu say I have to create it on my own and that it takes a lot of time. I don't quite know what it means by that...probably just code for 'you can't magic new jutsu out of a hat'. Which to be fair, that'd be completely broken and make things no fun.

Well, for a given value of fun. I'm trying to survive here, fun comes later.

Wait. I only get 15 skill points per level? Is this thing being serious right now? That's awful! I need like 10 more of those per level to get anywhere quickly. I'm going to need...actually, wait. I don't know how much Chakra Control and...Taijutsu? I'm guessing Taijutsu, in order to get Tsunade's megaton punch.

Because that thing will make my less than average strength irrelevant. Plus it'd be fun to have a Two-Step-Goodbye built into my fists.

If I wanted to increase my Charisma...that'd be the perk Intense Training. I can take that perk 10 times total, so I can take my Charisma to level 10 and still have one instance left over, which I can use to bring strength up to 5. The problem with that is that my maximum level, according to this handy-dandy manual, is 50. And also according to this manual, I only get a perk every other level. So I have 25 total perks, each of which I want to use to help my combat potential.

Besides, there has to be stat enhancing items, I'll just use those. If I can find one. I mean...actually do my current clothes affect my stats at all?

No.

Well, the shirt has a DR of 5, so that's cool. I take 5% less damage while wearing this shirt.

Oh, the intersection of real life physics and game mechanics is going to be fun to see.

As for the perks I actually want to consider for my level 2, there's Taijutsu Enthusiast, Swift Learner, Wall Crawler and Lady Killer.

Taijutsu Enthusiast would increase the power of my Taijutsu by 10%. Swift Learner increased all XP gain by 10% which, if this were a contained game with a definitive beginning, middle and end, that would look tempting. But this is, by it's own admission, a simulator. No real beginning, middle or end, so I've got all the time in the world to get to max level. Wall Crawler...immediately let me walk up walls without chakra. I mean, cool but why though?

Then there's Lady Killer. Increase your damage to women by 10% and improve your interactions with them.

...I'm going to be honest here, and just tell myself that I'm getting this perk at some point. I want to date, I want to get married and rear a family at some point. If Lady Killer can help with that then by all means, I think I can take a couple quality of life perks.

But it'll be a while.

As for the rest...I haven't even really been playing the game yet, so I don't know what's going to be useful.

Actually hang on, is there…?

Come on.

Please?

Can it be in here?

No.

It's not here.

Almost Perfect is not a perk in this game. My favorite perk in Fallout 3 isn't a thing in this Naruto simulation.

Blast it.

I'm actually upset right now.
* * *​

It's been several years since the man in green showed up at our orphanage and he hasn't shown his face since. Good thing too, I was getting massive 'final boss of the game' vibes from him. Actually no, not the final boss. He's more like a secret hidden boss that's dozens of times tougher than the final boss and everyone who can beat him earns bragging rights for the rest of their lives.

Anyway, it was now time for me to enter the Ninja academy.

Naruto was insanely jealous, but gave me a hug and said he was going to miss me all day.

Gotta say, I think the kid's my only friends right now and as far as friends go, I couldn't be luckier.
We were standing in the academy, the gates having been opened. Everyone was standing there in the center, ready to hear a speech from the Hokage.

To be honest, I was super excited. I was going to be a Ninja. I had wanted to enter the military in my old life, become awesome, see the world, all that stuff. But I just didn't have the stones. Now, with the game basically making it impossible for me to be exhausted, sore or even injured for more than a day, I was ready. I was going to learn how to jump stupidly high distances, throw fireballs and become an ultimate punch wizard.

It's probably not going to be ideal, but I'm immune to most of the garbage the instructors will throw at me. Worst they can do is mind games.

The Hokage's speech was on the Will of Fire, unsurprisingly. We're all family, love is the key to peace, that stuff. I mean, it's not wrong. Awful hard for people to want to wage war on everyone if everyone loves each other, but it takes a certain type of person who can overcome human nature and most people not only can't do it, but don't want to.

Well, maybe if everyone could reach each others minds or something, it'd be easier. At least, it'd be easier to identify people who threatened the public. Or something.

Once the speech ended, us first years were all herded into an assembly and told where our classroom was and who our teacher was.

For myself, I got a seat in the far back with my name on it, and my instructor was Sensei Okawa. He was an older man, a full head of gray hair and an eye patch. I knew his name because he wrote it on the black board. As for my class, I didn't see anyone I would recognize. Not Neji, Tenten or Lee at least, since the rest aren't coming to the academy for another year.

Our sensei stood up from his desk and clasped his hands behind his back. "Good morning, class. I'm Sensei Okawa Yuko."

There were some mumbled answers.

"What was that?" Sensei Okawa snapped. "I couldn't hear you!"

"Good morning, Sensei," We all chorused.

"Very good," Okawa replied. "Today marks the first day of your service to Konohagakure and the Will of Fire. You will learn the basics of how to defend yourselves and the Academy Three jutsu, Substitution, Transformation and Duplication. What you put into yourself, how much you train and how much you work hard will be how much you get out of yourself."

I wonder if training exercises will improve my skills while I'm here?

First guess is no, but I'm open to being wrong here.

"There are no shortcuts to success," Okawa continued, having everyone's rapt attention. "But we here at the Academy are going to help you along the road as quickly and efficiently as we can. To help us do that, I have a questionnaire. Each line of circles corresponds with an answer to the question above it. There are no wrong answers and you have an hour to finish before moving on to the basics of Taijutsu, Shurikenjutsu, History, and Chakra Shaping."

He handed the first stack of questionnaires to a boy with glasses, wearing a yellow shirt. "Take one, pass the rest."

I was in the very back of the glass in the corner, as far away from Sensei as I could possibly be, so I was the last to receive a questionnaire. I skimmed each of the questions briefly, and saw that it was mostly a personality test, with some interesting questions I couldn't quite tell why they would put it in a test like this.

"Begin."

I took the pencil on my desk and started filling it out. Only took me ten minutes. Once I was done, I got to the...back of the packet and immediately started looking around in a panic.

"Is there something wrong, Shimoda?" Sensei Okawa asked.

"No, no, Sensei," I replied, trying to smile. "Thanks for asking."

"Are you sure?" He pressed.

"Yep, I'm completely sure," I replied.

He shrugged.

Charisma Check Failed: 1 / 4.

Well that's annoying. I'm glad he didn't press it, but I'm guessing that he's still watching.

Shinobi are always watching.

On the final page of the questionnaire was a list of all my skills, written in black ink. Three of them were marked with a black arrow on their left side. This would be where I would tag my skills. In Fallout 3 and New Vegas, during character creation you would take three skills, which would give a free 15 point bonus to the skill. Presumably, that'd be what you're character chose to specialize in their backstory, before the game started.

The skills tagged were Melee Weapons, Ranged Weapons and Barter.

Going to be honest, that doesn't fit my plans at all. How do I untag a skill?

I lightly pressed my pencil on Barter, and the arrow disappeared, causing the skill to go from 24/100 to 9/100 on the sheet.

Okay good.

I untagged the other two and instead tagged Taijutsu, Chakra Control and Speech, bringing them to 32, 42 and 24 respectively. Taijutsu and Chakra Control because Tsunade's Megaton Punch, which is what I'm calling it, is going to be my main early game weapon when my chakra levels are low and I can't really afford to use chakra intensive jutsu to keep them at bay. Speech was entirely to patch up the hole I dug for myself in dumping Charisma. I should be able to communicate like a human being now, though I don't think I'm actually going to be able to get people to like me outside of strenuous situations.

There's got to be a way to raise my stats outside of Intensive Training. I wonder, since this is a simulator classified as a simulator, if I can use the Medicine skill to create some kind of therapy to increase my SPECIAL stats. I mean, Fallout: New Vegas had implants you could buy that would, basically, be an increase as if you used the perk.

Anyway, that comes later.

Right now, I just pressed the done button at the bottom corner and watched as the sheet disappeared completely.

Alright then. That's a good thing, I was really worried for a second.

An hour came and went and the bell rang for the next class.

"Leave your questionnaires on your desk," Sensei Okawa said as we were dismissed. "I will collect them. For now, follow me to your next class."

We all lined up together to head to the next class and I'm glad I was in the back of the line, because I wound up with another surprise.

Quest Added: (Tutorial) Four Long Years.
Complete Ninja Academy! (0/4)
Optional: Pass the graduation exam early.


Wait, why is the first objective divided up into four parts?

Oh, that's right, the Academy lasts for Four Years. Though I didn't think you could take the Graduation Exam early...actually, that makes sense, since Naruto took it a bunch of times before in canon, so I guess he was trying to get out early.

...which makes sense if he was being ignored by the adults and getting picked on by the rest of the kids.
* * *​

Character Sheet: Shimoda Daisuke.

Health: 200.
Chakra: 85.
S.P.E.C.I.A.L Stats:

Strength: 4
Perception: 5
Endurance: 5
Charisma: 1
Intelligence: 10
Agility: 5
Luck: 10

Taijutsu (Endurance): 32
Melee Weapons (Strength): 15
Ranged Weapons (Agility): 17
Genjutsu (Perception): 17
Ninjutsu (Endurance): 17
Speech (Charisma): 24
Barter (Charisma): 9
Sneak (Agility): 17
Pick Lock (Perception): 17
Fuinjutsu (Intelligence): 27
Medicine (Intelligence): 27
Survival (Perception): 17
Chakra Control (Intelligence): 42

Perks:
(None).
* * *​

Author's Note: Yeah. Yeah, I did this.

If everything went like it was supposed too, you should've read something in the previous rendition that said that this was coming. If it didn't, because I'm a fickle author, then let me give you the run down.

Every problem that I had with the first Draft's second Act was a natural consequence of decisions I made while writing Act One. The godlike power to drawn any jutsu out of thin air, the elimination of all stakes, his ultimately fairly shallow personal vendetta against the village...the story ended when Daisuke made his peace with how he died. Then...I kept going.

You all know I had plenty of issues continuing the story. I know that for many of you, it was your favorite. But I couldn't continue it. Not with what it turned into and what it became. Nothing was satisfying anymore. He leveraged his power to get everything he wanted. Then...what? Okay? So what? No threats, no stakes, no satisfaction in writing the story any more.

So...I made the difficult decision to do a rewrite. Yeah, I know. You see these all the time on FF, where people get dissatisfied with the story they wrote after like ten pages and then after they rewrite some small part, they give up.

If you want to tie it to the first draft, make it so the game went from Beta to release and Daisuke lost all his progress as often happens when a game makes that transition. You'll note the many, many nerfs I did on the gamer power as a result, including the removal of Almost Perfect, the first drafts big McGuffin. Because in order to keep that things power, I had to make a lot of decisions that hurt the plot and were nonsensical.

You'll also note that I'm trying to introduce some big Act 2 characters while Daisuke is still vulnerable so that their inclusion doesn't feel as jarring as before.

As for the character sheet, I understand it was difficult for you to keep up with the nonsense, so I made some formatting changes and whenever he levels up, I'll post the updated character sheet down at the bottom.

mce-anchormce-anchormce-anchormce-anchormce-anchormce-anchormce-anchormce-anchormce-anchormce-anchormce-anchor Shout Out goes out too Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Ventari, PbookR, Seij, ChristobalAlvarez, Apperatus, EPiCJB19, Seeking Raven, Handwran, Russel Beatrous, Richard Whereat as well as our newest patrons Juan Pendragon and Samuel Reed. Thank you all for your continued support!

...this will be worth it.

Until the next time.

~Fulcon
 
Last edited:
Chapter 2: One Short Year.
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *
We all arrived in the Taijutsu training hall and I noticed that Okawa left us the second we got in eyesight of our other instructor. The training hall had places marked in the floor for us to stand we did so to the loud and repeated instruction from the guy at the head of the room.

"Welcome everyone." I recognized our new instructor, with the bandanna tied around the top of his head and shoulder-length white hair. Or at least, he looked really familiar. "My name is Mizuki and I'll be your Taijutsu Sensei here at the Academy!"

Oh, right. The jerk who tricked Naruto into stealing a scroll of forbidden jutsu and then told him about the Kyuubi in just about the worst way possible.

You know, I think I might tell Naruto about the Kyuubi instead and help him pass his graduation exam to prevent that from happening. Because screw this guy.

"Just to start, I'm going to demonstrate a simple Kata," Mizuki explained. "You will follow along exactly. Then I will repeat until we've all learned five different katas. By then, the class will be over and you'll move on to the next period."

Oh, fun. For some reason, I thought we were just going to devolve straight into full contact sparring and try to straight up maul each other. I guess that comes later.

Just like he said, we learned his katas and then moved on to the next class. He escorted us straight to there. It was a large room with poles stretching up to the ceiling with targets painted on them. Here we had yet another Sensei, this one a woman with black hair tied in a bun.

She introduced herself as Nara Kumiko, which made me blink as I subconsciously tied her to Shikamaru. We got passed a small pack, and I opened it up to see that it contained a kunai and four shuriken.

"Class, this is a Shuriken," She said, holding up a four-pointed star. "It is really sharp and will cut you or someone you care about if you are careless-"

"Ow!"

Did someone just lose a finger?

"Like that," Kumiko said, exasperatedly, before running off to her desk to grab a tissue paper in the blink of an eye, before running to the student who got cut.

It was the boy with glasses and a yellow shirt, who was nursing a bleeding finger. She wrapped the finger up. "Hold that there. What's your name?"

"Nakamura Nichiren, Sensei," He responded.

"Okay, give me your kunai," She said, more snatching it from him than anything. As she examined the edge, she frowned, and called over one of the Chunin standing at the entrance. "Get him to the nurses office."

With that, he was escorted from the room. Curiously, I looked at my own kunai and noted, with disappointment, that my edges were sharp. Then again, they had to be if they were going to pierce the wooden targets.

Still, it's a good idea to ingrain into the kids heads early that these are not toys. They are weapons. If someone almost has to lose a finger to prove the point...well, so be it.

"As I was saying," Kumiko continued, holding the weapon in between her fingers. "It has four points. You hold them like this to prevent cutting yourself. The point does not come past the skin of your fingers."

She then went into an explanation about how to throw it.

What was my throwing skill, 17? Well, it's good enough, I guess, for the early game. For the tutorial, surely. In the games, you could have a skill as low as 9 and still be able to hit stationary targets if they weren't too far from you.

And those targets didn't look that far.

The Shuriken buried one of its points into the wooden target without a sound. Then, she drew a kunai, and went into an explanation. "This is a Kunai. It's main feature is the single point here at the top which you stab with."

Makes sense, trying to cut with that thing looks like a nightmare. Unless chakra fixes that little issue? I mean, it would neatly solve that logical conundrum. So it probably does.

Once she was done explaining every inch of the kunai, she threw it and buried it in the wooden target.

I noticed there were only four targets in this room, so only four of us got to practice. We were given a stack of ten shuriken and four kunai. We were told to hit the target, and not take too long aiming.

Presumably because there were a lot of kids and we couldn't really afford to take our time.

When it came to my turn, I picked up a kunai and took a breath.

"Today, Shimoda."

She startled me with that, but I still hit the target.

Then I hit it again.

Yeah, okay. This isn't that bad. It's a big target that's not moving. Easy to hit, something I proved by landing all my shots. On the final kunai, though, is when things got interesting. It buried itself in the post up to the ring, letting out a small shock wave that might as well been thunder for how startling it was.

I blinked. "Uh…"

Kumiko ran over to the post and put her finger in the ring. She tried to pull it up and failed. She tried again, placing a foot on the post, and pulled it out, taking some of the target with it as the wood had been pulled up by the kunai's bent tip.

She looked at the weapon and she looked at me. "How did you do that?"

"I don't know," I replied, growing keenly aware that the students behind me starting to whisper.

Charisma Check Failure: 1 / 4.

Yeah, I need to find a shirt or something that boosts charisma, because this is stupid.

Her eyes narrowed. "Alright. Next round of students, we can still use the target."

I moved to the back of the class.

...but seriously, how did I do that?



Wait.

That was a critical hit.

Hah, my Luck stat came in hot there. That's Hilarious! Well, I'll know when I get a critical hit when someone's head explodes from a Kunai.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/5.

Actually, hang on. I just realized that with my strength scaling with my level and that I'm really strong for my age...I might actually have to be careful when I'm sparring with people. No going all out. Because these really are just kids right now. Chakra might change that as time goes on, but right now?

I don't want to kill anyone.
* * *​

History was...I don't know.

I can almost guarantee that it was mostly propaganda. Because Konoha did nothing wrong ever while those huge bullies in Iwa and Kumo were mean and wanted war for no reason. That's...not how real wars go. Though if what happened with Neji's father did happen then Kumo is absolutely as viscous as advertised.

Doesn't mean Konoha isn't either.

Chakra shaping was, what do you know, taught by Okawa, who demonstrated sticking a leaf to his finger and just let it dangle, explaining it as slowly and as clearly as he could to those of us in the class who had never heard of chakra control in our lives.

Jutsu Learned: Chakra Shaping!

You can now use chakra for a variety of tasks, like sticking and connecting to things!

Okay, neat.

"On your desks, you each have your own leaf. Stick it to your finger."

I did so.

Chakra Control Check Success: 42 / 10.

Yeah, that was pretty easy. I even spiced it up by making it stand up on my finger and spin around like a vertical windmill. Made me snort and I tried challenging myself by pushing it slightly to flip it over so it would spin on it's tip instead of it's stem.

Chakra Control Check Success: 42/10.

The kid next to me, a red-headed girl saw what I was doing and hunched over her desk, muttering to herself. "Creepy weirdo."

Who needs you? I can make leaves spin. To prove the point, I flipped it over again so it's stem was connected to my finger, then I made it lay flat and made it spin like a propeller so I could pretend my finger was an airplane.

I did not make the noise, though, even though I really wanted too.

...I'm so bored.

Wish I had my laptop so I could play video games. Miss League of Legends so much.

Wait, wasn't there a technique where you could make strings out of Chakra? I think there was, because I remember a puppeteer ninja in the show, dressed up in all black. Yeah, let's try that out.

Chakra Control Check Success: 42/40.

What, no experience for that? Annoying.

I let the leaf drop just a little bit on a chakra zipline before I immediately snatched it up and looked around.

Daisuke, you fool. That puppet Shinobi was from Suna and he was competing in the Chunin exams! Doing something like that on the first day of the academy is guaranteed to get you all of the wrong attention!

But nothing happened, and I let out a sigh of relief, contenting myself with returning to boredom.

Soon, class ended and we were let out for the day.

You know, I'm wondering if maybe I should just rush Chakra Control.

Just because of how absurdly useful it is in the entire series. The only reason Sakura was really able to use Tsunade's Megaton Punch and be a good medic-nin was because of how impeccable her Chakra control was and if I can get The Punch in the first few levels of my play through, weaker enemies aren't going to stand a chance.

I may or may not be slightly biased since my Naruto waifu was always Sakura but it always bugged me how she got sidelined for Sasuke and Naruto. There were like a million ways to make Sakura relevant in the show with Chakra control like hers.

After several minutes of making the leaf do the Can-Can, the bell rang.

"Class dismissed," Okawa called out. "Homework for today is continuing the exercise. I expect you all to have mastered this exercise in two days."

I was the last to leave the classroom, simply because I didn't want to have to deal with the rush of students trying to get out of here as quickly as possible. I mean, I didn't mind, because it was way, way better than the grand total of nothing I got to do before today.

Got to wonder how long it'll be before I get tired of it, though.

Perception Check Success: 5 / 5.

As I left the classroom, I could feel Sensei's eyes on me. The fact that he didn't say anything only made the odd knot in my stomach worse.
* * *
For our next Taijutsu class, after we had practiced the katas for a week, making sure we could perform them without following along, we got broken off into full contact sparring. I find it interesting the Mizuki never showed anyone what the moves were supposed to look like with a volunteer, but then, maybe he doesn't want to program us into thinking our opponents were going to be cooperative.

Because they most certainly wouldn't be.

My partner was a girl. Her hair was tied into a thin ponytail with twin locks of hair falling down past her chin, framing her face and obsidian eyes. She was wearing a red jacket that seemed a couple sizes too big for her and was kind of worn.

"Hi, I'm Shimoda Daisuke," I said, introducing myself. "What's your name?"

"Yamada Hisako," She replied.

"Bow to your partners!" Mizuki called.

We did so.

"Start!"

We both went into our stances. I noticed that hers wasn't quite right, she left herself too open in the center and she had too much weight on her back foot. She threw the first punch, and I dodged to left and walked around her.

I didn't really want to attack her because I could accidentally break something. Having the strength of an adult in an eight year old frame was really dangerous. All that power in the small surface area of my fist could cause serious problems if I wasn't careful.

Need to limit test to see how hard I can hit and how much I need to hold back, but I haven't found a good opportunity to slip away so I could do it without anyone watching.

She threw a kick to my head and I just leaned my head back and watched her foot sail past my nose with a breeze following through after it. Walk around to the right this time, following her back as she tried to whirl around to face me.

This went on. She kept attacking and attacking and I just kept not getting hit. Back up, back up, duck under the leg and run forward out of her reach. Eventually, she winded herself, bracing herself on her knees as she panted.

"Aren't you going to try to hit me?" She asked with a growl.

"Not really," I replied.

"Why not?" Hisako demanded.

"Because I don't want to."

She glared. "We're supposed to be training. Now stop being an idiot and hit me!"

Okay, I'll give her one hit. After she's caught her breath.

She growled in frustration and threw a punch at my face, which I simply leaned to the side to dodge and threw a punch to her stomach.

It was a little bit too hard, though because the second it landed, she made a sound like she was going to be sick. I leaned back and she collapsed to her knees, clutching her stomach with tears dripping from her eyes.

I think she's going to be okay, she's just clearly winded.

Glad I didn't punch with everything I had, because then I might've ruptured some organs and that would've been bad.

I knelt down and patted her back. "Breathe. Breathe."

She took a deep gasp of breath, shakily panting as her breath returned.

"Everything okay?" Mizuki asked as he appeared right there.

"I just knocked the wind out of her," I replied. "I think she'll be fine."

"Look at me," Mizuki told Hisako, kneeling down to get to her level, grabbing her cheeks in one hand to look into her eyes. "Yeah, she'll be fine. Try to tone it back when you're sparring with your classmates, okay?"

I tried. "Yes, Sensei."
* * *


Finally, a moment of peace alone.

Since I started going to the academy, Naruto had been pestering me for details on what it was going to be like. He seemed really disappointed that there was a lot of reading books and stuff but still seemed keen on going. Maybe being prepared for what it was like will help him get better grades, who knows.

But still, I was allowed to remain behind this time as Naruto was summoned to the Hokage's office for something. I think he's just checking in on him, but I don't know the Hokage all that well.

Anyway, since I was alone in my room, that I shared with Naruto since we both became too old for a nursery, I could finally do some testing.

First, wall walking.

I put my foot on my bedroom wall and stuck to it.

Chakra Control check success: 42/20.

Just like that, I was anchored to the wall. I brought my other foot up and stuck it to the wall too. With a nervous laugh, I started walking up toward the ceiling. It felt so weird to have gravity pull me back instead of down but I guess you could get used to it.

Then I stepped up on the ceiling and noted, with glee, that not only could I walk on the ceiling, I could do it without it collapsing under my own weight.

All that chakra reinforcing the structure helps a ton.

Still, I can't help but feel a tad disappointed that I didn't get EXP for pulling this off on my own. Like, it's a new technique. Sure, I didn't get exp for the Jutsu chakra shaping...wait, I should've gotten EXP for that too.

Well, that's lame.

No EXP for skill checks, no EXP for new Jutsu...is quests the only thing that's going to level me up? I guess so. Need to go looking for quests when I can.

Well, I mean, I have one quest already. Four Long Years, which I can complete early by taking the exam. Can I complete the exam?

I think I can. I mean, so far the only skill checks I've seen are twenty and below. I just need to wait for them to host the final exams and then take them. See, that's the cool about the Konoha Academy is that when they held the exams, any one could take them and if you passed, you graduated, got a Hitai-ate and everything.

They hold exams at the end of the year, right? Just make it until then, make sure I can do everything and-wait I can't cast the jutsu.

Alright, looks like I'm making a trip to the Konoha library before I return to the Orphanage tomorrow. I've kind of been avoiding the Library, not because I didn't want to read everything, but because I'd probably give into temptation and read all the skill books before I was ready for them.

At level four, there's a perk called 'Comprehension', which increases the number of skill points I get from books by one, which makes those limited and treasured resources way more useful. Then at level six, I'd grab 'Educated', which gives me two flat additional skill points per level. So I grab comprehension at 4, hopefully hit four skill books which will pay for the points I missed by not taking 'Educated'.

Look, the only reason I'm prioritizing Comprehension at all is because this isn't a post-apocalyptic setting where all the books burned in nuclear fire; there's tons of stuff available, I just want to be able to use it to it's greatest effect.

I looked up to the floor and with a great deal of trepidation, let go of the ceiling.

Agility Check Success: 5/5.

Didn't even flip, I just turned in the air and landed on my feet. Which was good because I didn't want to land on my head there...but better to land on my head here instead of in the middle of a quest.

Okay, now for the real test.

I walked up to the wall, made a fist and tried to punch the wall, like I remembered The Punch being described: You bunch up chakra in your fist and release it the instant you make contact.

Chakra Control Check Failed: 42/80.

Taijutsu Check Failed: 32/80.

180/200 Health.

Ow!

My fist throbbed in pain at the impact and I held it with my other hand.

Okay, that's about what I expected. Still, I can get the required Chakra Control in three levels and then Taijutsu in another 3, so I'll be level 7 when I can throw around Tsunade's Megaton Punch.

...now I need a nap to heal my hand up because this is starting to annoy me.
* * *​

The Academy Library is a secure facility. It was a four story building for all of Konoha's needs. The first level was accessible to anyone, or at least, it was accessible to Academy Level students. Second level was accessible to Genin, the third Chunin and the last one could only be accessed if you were a Jounin.

At the entrance there was a Shinobi acting as librarian, sitting at the reception desk. She was an old girl with her gray hair in a bun. I don't know what her rank was, but she had a Hitai-ate and that was enough for me. "Hello there, young man. Please remember to stay on this level while you're here."

Luckily for me, I only needed the Academy three. "Thank you."

I walked around the desk and into the main library. Like I expected, there were books on books on book on books, scrolls tucked away in shelves, which reached over my head and reached the ceiling. Since the Librarian didn't offer to help and I didn't want to bother with asking, I decided to look for myself.

Check the labels and sections...luckily for me, they had an entire section on Ninjutsu. Also, luckily for me, it was literally just a tiny corner of the library with the sign 'Ninjutsu' hanging from the ceiling by chains and most of them were scrolls.

The shelves contained a lot of titles. Beginner's theory, Chakra Shaping for Beginners...here we go! A scroll marked as E-ranked Jutsu. Good stuff!

I grabbed it and moved to a table, unfurling it so I could read it all and I did.

Ninjutsu Check Success: 17/15.

Ninjutsu Check Success: 17/15.

Ninjutsu Check Success: 17/15.

You have learned the Transformation Jutsu, the Substitution Jutsu and the Duplication Jutsu!

Henge, Kawarimi and Bunshin. All important techniques, so let's test them out.

Chakra Control Check Success: 42/15.

That clone looks like a marble statue from hell. I mean, I saw him every day when I looked in the mirror, but this just solidifies it. He wasn't reacting when I was looking at him, because this wasn't a clone with any sort of free will.

I dispelled him to try my next technique.

Chakra Control Check Success: 42/15.

With my Henge applied, I dug my manual out from my pocket and looked up my stats.

Charisma: 4 (+3).

YES!

Okay, that makes things so much better.

Made another clone and yeah, that's way better. It's still pretty pale, and those hazel eyes still look way too blank for their own good, but it's not a moving statue made out of gray clay. With hair made out of wire.

Finally, let's test the substitution jutsu.

Chakra Control Check success: 42/15.

So I didn't even make a smoke-screen, though I could overfill the jutsu with chakra if I wanted one, but I was pretty disappointed in this one. All it does it create a chakra construct. A really durable one, but a chakra construct nonetheless. One that looks like me and lets me run away while the log takes the hit. In other words, it's meant to either be used with deliberately poor chakra control to create the smoke screen or with the Body Flicker, which is a D-rank jutsu that probably exists in written form on the floor above me.

Personally, I was hoping for teleportation like I thought it was. I mean, it sure looked like it, but it's like the predecessor to shadow clones; only you make a log that's transformed to look like you. Probably why Naruto didn't have trouble since this jutsu is designed to be overloaded.

Unlike regular clones.

Speaking of which, I wonder if there's a way to teach Naruto the shadow clone so he doesn't wind up fooled by Mizuki later...

Quest Added: Chasing Shadows.

Learn the Shadow Clone Jutsu.
Learn the Mass Shadow Clone Jutsu.


Teach Naruto the Shadow Clone Jutsu.
Teach Naruto the Mass Shadow Clone Jutsu.


Looks like it. So that's two quests I've got now, but I've got no idea on how to get the Jutsu scroll, then teach Naruto that Jutsu without also getting annihilated by the Hokage. Sure, Naruto beat the Hokage with the...Sexy Jutsu, but I also think Naruto is given a lot of leeway to go wherever he wants. I'm pretty sure the Hokage's going to give him an apartment when he gets into the Academy so he can leave the Orphanage.

This is also confirmation – no experience for learning Jutsu. This sucks. Actually, I wonder if I can modify Chakra shaping to replicate the Body-Flicker jutsu…

You do not know that Jutsu.

That's also a no.

Well, it was worth a shot.

I put the scroll back and started my walk out of the library, when I got to the door, I got stopped.

"Now hold on," The librarian said. "Who are you?"

"Oh," I said, turning in place. "I came in earlier? I'm wearing a henge right now."

"Wait...oh, right, I recognize you now." Recognition lit up in her eyes. "Why are you wearing a henge?"

"Because without it I look like a statue."

"...fair enough."
* * *
Okay, it's been a year and it's been...a painful one.

Not really because of all the stuff I learned or had to learn, but because kids could be cruel when they thought no one was looking. Sure, no one tried anything to my face because it only took one punch to send them to the floor. But they did talk about me behind my back and tried to pull pranks, usually to try to get me to drop the henge. Which, frankly, wasn't happening.

The only real exception to this was Hisako.

I honestly didn't expect her to come to me for a rematch, but she did. Every chance she got, she came to me for a rematch and every time, she lost. But she got better every time. She even asked me what she was doing wrong and I was able to help her out a little bit. Mostly it was just that she was an eight year old with the strength and speed of an eight year old trying to fight an eight year old with the strength and speed of an adult.

Honestly though, I think she relished the challenge.

I think, I don't know for sure.

I'm just glad the year is over.

But the year was up and they were hosting the graduation exam. Most of the exam takers were twelve year olds that towered over me, but there were some others who were closer to my age. Closer, I was the only one who actually looked nine.

But I passed the test. Sparred appropriately with Mizuki-sensei who was grading my Taijutsu. Hit all my targets with the Shuriken and Kunai and for the final evaluation, performed all the jutsu flawlessly.

"Well," Iruka was one of the evaluators, sitting behind a table with two other Chunin-instructors. On the side of the table were three boxes filled with headbands...and arm bands. And belts. I wanted a belt. "Shimoda Daisuke, you...passed the test. Congratulations."

"Thank you, Sensei," I replied with a bow.

"I don't think you'll get on a team, however," Iruka continued. "If only because you're so young."

"But other Shinobi got onto teams when they were younger than me," I pointed out.

Charisma Check failed: 4/7.

Oh, shut up, game.

"Well, that would be because we were at war," Iruko said, his eyebrow starting to twitch. "If we were at war, you'd have no trouble finding a place to land. But since we aren't starved for manpower, you aren't getting on a team."

"But I did get my promotion, right?" I asked quickly. "Because I graduated?"

"Yes, you are officially a genin of Konoha," Iruka said quickly. "Congratulations. But because there were enough graduates for even teams, there isn't really a spot for you."

"Okay good," I replied with a sigh of relief. "So I don't have to go to class anymore."

"That's right, you don't," Iruka's eyebrow twitching got even worse. "But I highly recommend you keep coming to class so that the other students can learn from your example."

"No thanks." I just shook my head.

"Come on, at least think about it!" Iruka finally exploded with a giant head. "They could really use you!"

"Nah. I only like one other student, the rest are jerks."

Iruka sighed and sat back down. "Fine."

"Can I get one of those cool belt protectors instead of my forehead?"

"Yes, check this box right here," Iruka replied, rubbing his eyes.

Quest Completed: Four Long Years.

Completed: (Optional): Pass the Graduation Exam early.

Bum-bum-bum-Bum!

LEVEL UP!

Level 5!

Wait, what?

I just leveled straight to level 5, what the heck?

Oh, I get it. The quest objective was divided into four steps and I was going to get an automatic level up for each year I completed. Okay, cool.

For perks, like I talked about, I went Taijutsu Enthusiast and Comprehension. Since I was level five, I had 60 skill points to mess around with. So I immediately dumped 38 of those into Chakra Control, bringing it straight to 80/100. For other 22 points, I put them all into Taijutsu, bringing it to 54/100. Another 26 skill points and I can get Tsunade's Megaton Punch.

Experience until Level 6: 0 / 12,000.

...should I be worried that apparently this game is apparently supposed to start you off at level 5? Because going by RPG logic, I'm in for a bad time.
* * *​

"You graduated?" Naruto asked in shock.

"Yup!" I replied with a really big grin.

"But I start the academy tomorrow!" Naruto whined. "You're not going to be there?"

"Well, I'll be in the library," I reassured him. I did need to go check for all those skill books and see if I could get Tsunade's Megaton Punch faster than level 7. If I could find seven Taijutsu skill books, that'd be ideal since I could just get it relatively quick. "So you can come see me in there."

Sneaking suspicion that I won't find seven.

"Okay I will," Naruto said, folding his arms together. "But you better be there."

"I will," I said with a nod. "I am going to be studying though...and spending lunch outside of the library."

"It's only going to be a year, though," Naruto replied with a grin.

"Why do you say that?" I asked.

"Because I'm going to graduate in a single year," Naruto bragged. "Just like you!"

"You'll have to work and study really hard," I told him, knowing full well that he was going to do neither of these things. He's a kinesthetic learner, so he was only going to get better after he graduates and can start doing proper training exercises.

It's why Taijutsu is his best subject, there's a lot of physical practice. Actually, giving Naruto exercises that he can do to improve his chakra control might allow him to actually use the regular clone technique. Maybe.

"Pft, it'll be easy!" Naruto said. "I'm going to be Hokage someday, so this should be a breeze!
* * *​

Of course, even I can get bored in the Library with all the books, so I would come out and stretch my legs.

The academy was let out for recess, so the grounds were all filled with people and...way out in the distance, I could see a little girl in a red jacket sitting against a tree.

Oh, I haven't seen Hisako in months. I wonder how she's doing.

She looked up at me as I approached. "Wait, Daisuke?"

"Hey."

She stood up and threw a punch. I caught the punch and twisted her arm behind her back.

"Don't do that," I said flatly.

"They-ow-told me that-ow-you graduated," She grit out. "Let go of me!"

"Are you going to try to hit me again?" I asked with a frown. I do not like that a girl hitting a guy is considered funny by some here in Konoha.

"No!"

I let her go. "Now, are you okay?"

"Yeah," Hisako said, shaking her arm out. "Did your grip get even stronger or something?"

"No," I said. "Just got better at grappling."

"Cool," Hisako said. "But they told me you graduated. Where have you been?"

"Library," I answered. "I'm not allowed on a team yet since they're all even or something. I don't know, it's kind of stupid."

"So you did graduate," Hisako asked to confirm.

"I did," I said with a nod. "Pretty easily, too."

"Congratulations," Hisako said with a smile that looked kind of off, but I couldn't place why. "I'm really happy for you."

"Thank you," I beamed. "So, why are you out here by yourself?"

"I just didn't want to hang out with anyone right now," Hisako asked.

"How come?"

"Because," Hisako said, sitting back down and letting out a breath.

Charisma Check Success: 4/4.

"Well, I mean if you don't want to talk about it, that's fine," I said with a shrug. "I just wanted to see how you were doing. It was good seeing you."

"Wait!" Hisako started. "I didn't mean for you to leave, I just...I don't know. I'm not in a good mood right now."

"I'm sorry," I said, taking a seat. "You want to talk about it?"

"Well," Hisako started. "It's my Dad. He's a Shinobi and he just left on a long term mission. Really long term."

"You must miss him a lot," I replied with a frown.

"Yeah," Hisako replied. "This is the first time he's been gone for this long since I was born. I wish he didn't have to go."

"Do you still have your Mom?" I asked.

"Yeah," Hisako replied. "But she misses him too."

...I'm starting to wonder if maybe he died and her mom hasn't told her yet. Maybe?

Charisma Check Failed: 4/7.

Shut up, game.

"So I'm just not feeling good," Hisako said.

I hummed. "Well, I mean, I'm not the best company, so if you want me to go…"

"No, no. You're fine," Hisako replied earnestly. "We can sit and talk about...I don't know. How'd you graduate?"

"Just aced the test," I replied with a shrug. "No team, though."

"I'm sorry," Hisako sympathized. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Nothing to say," I answered. "It just sucks."

She hummed. "You want to spar?"

I blinked. "Sure, I guess."
* * *
Chakra Control increased by 4.
Chakra Control increased by 4.
Chakra Control increased by 4.


I managed to find the skill books, but reading a different copy of the same book didn't work. I mean, I didn't expect it too, but it's just a drag.

Taijutsu increased by 4.
Taijutsu increased by 4.
Taijutsu increased by 4.


Still, it didn't take long for Comprehension to pay for itself. It's already netted me six extra points to compensate for the four that I lost by not taking Educated. Good stuff. I honestly wish I knew which books were skill books, I didn't get the increase until I had finished reading the book in full and not every book here that looks like a Skill Book is a skill book. They're informative, sure, but they don't give me skills based on what they're about.

There's not even really a thing they all have in common; some of the 'books' are scrolls.

Ranged Weapons increased by 4.
Ranged Weapons increased by 4.
Ranged Weapons increased by 4.


Pretty annoying, I have to say. Still, my life could be a lot worse. Since I don't have to go to school any more, I spend most of my days either in the Library, going to meet Hisako during recess or sleeping since I could sleep on demand.

Ninjutsu Increased by 4.
Ninjutsu Increased by 4.
Ninjutsu Increased by 4.


Really is peaceful. Seems to be going a lot faster to boot. Kind of weird that there was only one book on each subject on the student floor of the library, but then again, I think that has more to do with how not every book is a skill book. Thankfully, the Genin floor had more material.

Genjutsu Increased by 4.
Genjutsu Increased by 4.
Genjutsu Increased by 4.


Genjutsu, as a branch of study, is kind of screwed up. You can take someone's sense of reality, their ability to perceive their environment, and just force them to hallucinate. And the brain believes it! A person's first instinct when they're hit with a Genjutsu is to believe what they're seeing, no matter how insane it is. Part of our training in the Academy was recognizing when we were in a Genjutsu, but there was no way it was going to be enough until we've been in one. And we haven't.

Survival increased by 4.
Survival increased by 4.
Survival increased by 4.


There were plenty of books on survival in the student section. Like, a lot. Given how survival information is really important no matter what grade you were, it made sense. Especially if the village got invaded and the students had to go into hiding.

Rounded up that brings my Chakra Control to 92, my Taijutsu to 66, Ranged Weapons, Ninjutsu and Genjutsu to 29 and my Survival skill to 33. Honestly a really good haul. Downright incredible, as far as games are concerned, but I've got 886 points to go before I max out all my skills. Since I'm getting Educated next level, which gives me 17 points per level, and I'll have 44 more levels to go, that's 748 skill points just from leveling. At the end, I'll be 138 points short of full skills, which isn't the worst thing in the world, but it will bother me. I'll need to find 35 more skill books to finish that off.
* * *
Today was the day Naruto failed for the first time to graduate from the Academy early.

I mean, he hasn't come to tell me about it in the Library yet, but that's what's going to happen. I know this because he can't produce a Clone and he can't produce a clone because he basically told me that he didn't want my help when I offered while he was telling me about how unfair it was that he couldn't make a simple clone.

The guy's got way too much chakra to properly manage.

Currently reading the one book by Jiraiya that I can actually stand: The Tale of the Utterly Gutsy Shinobi which...is okay. So okay, it's average, in fact. I'm reading it because I've been curious as to why the guys been locked into the erotica industry and I see why.

Not a lot of talent here, which makes me sad.

I was pulled from my book when Naruto pulled himself up a chair and held his head in his hands.

"So, how'd you do?" I asked with a smile.

"Not good," Naruto grumbled.

"That's too bad," I replied.

"It's just can't make one stupid clone," Naruto slammed the table. "I don't know what it is and don't say it's because of chakra control, I do all the other jutsu fine."

"Doing a jutsu with tons of smoke is the opposite of fine," I pointed out to him. "That's only a good thing in one case."

Charisma Check Failed: 4/9.

"It's totally fine," Naruto argued hotly. "It happens with the other two jutsu and they work perfectly."

"Yeah, but overloading the Bunshin just causes chakra bleed as the chakra shape can't contain everything you're putting into it," I replied with a frown.

"But that's not my fault," Naruto glared. "No one will help me develop my chakra control!"

"Hey, I gave you three different exercises you could do to improve your control-" It was at that moment that the Librarian's killing intent flooded the room and made us regret living.

Then it faded when we shut up.

"Whatever, you're no help," Naruto whispered, standing up and stalking off. "I'll figure it out on my own."

Alright then. I'm trying to figure out in what world I wasn't helpful. I even did the exercises with him at first to make sure he knew what he was doing.

Charisma Check Failure: 4/6.

Alright then. There is clearly something going on that I don't understand. So, best thing to do is find a way to figure it out, because it's already been a year since I graduated and I still haven't been put on a team. Not entirely sure I trust the official explanation I was given. Wonder if it had something to do with how the Hokage and I spoke all those years ago. Back when Naruto and I first met?

Charisma Check Success: 4/4.

I tweaked him somehow. That's a little annoying, but whatever. I think it'll pass. Once the rest of my class catches up to me, I'll be on a team and doing quests like a good RPG. Or I can start looking for a quest or something to do while I'm waiting, but the issue is that I've got no idea where to start looking. And to be honest, I kind of don't want to. I don't want to die again and traveling around with a team is a great way to avoid that.I've just been sleeping most of the day away since the Library's not open all day, every day, 24 / 7.

Makes things go really fast.
* * *
Ninjutsu Check success: 29 / 25.

Jutsu Learned: Body Flicker Jutsu.

By super charging your body, you can move at blinding speeds! Disclaimer: Vault-Tec is not responsible for injury sustained while moving at blinding speeds.

That one actually got a chortle out of me.

Ninjutsu Check Success: 29 / 25.

Jutsu Learned: Temporary Paralysis Jutsu.

Medusa's got nothing on you! With this technique, you can paralyze someone with eye contact alone!

Well, as long as there weren't anyone with a reflective shield around, I guess I should be safe, shouldn't I?

I rolled up the scroll and put it back where it came from, using that new, nifty body flicker technique I got today.

Figured today was as good a day as any to actually pick up the two jutsu publicly available to Genin. I've been putting it off because I kept getting absorbed into another book and, well, they weren't going anywhere.

Today was the day. As I expected, I wasn't allowed to get a team until my classmates caught up with me...three years later. So, as I walked the Academy, as I felt a tinge of nostalgia for...ah, who am I kidding, I hated this place.

Still, I was able to make my way from the library to classroom where teams were assigned without getting lost. In I walked and I noted, that it was a pretty mixed bag. Not even half of the kids in this room were kids from my class, though I did note Hisako and...what was his name...yellow shirt? Nichiren! Nichiren was here.

"Daisuke!" Hisako called with a giant smile on her face. She waved, and then patted the seat next to her. "Come sit by me!"

I don't see why not.

"Hey, good to see you," I said with a smile.

Not a very good one, but a smile nontheless.

She returned it, and I noted that her jacket actually wasn't so loose on her anymore. "Same! Do you think we'll be on a team together?"

"I hope so," I replied with a smile. Wouldn't mind that at all, actually. She was really cool.

"Good morning, Genin," Okawa, who hadn't gotten any older since last I saw him, started. "Good to see some new and old faces joining the Shinobi force. We need you. I know it's been said a lot, but it's true. Konoha cannot stand without new Shinobi like yourselves joining the ranks. Thank you for the sacrifices you've made and the ones that you will make in the future."

I don't remember it being said a lot to me. But then, I graduated in a single year because screw the rest of the class. Except for Hisako.

...and maybe Nichiren, now that I think about it. Did he do anything to tick me off?

No, he didn't.

So screw everyone but Hisako and Nichiren. Well, the guys in my class. I didn't share a class with Neji, Rock or Tenten, who are also in the room right now.

"Now, for teams."

As the teams were announced, each Sensei entered the room like they had been called and collected their genin. Biggest entrance was Team 9, who had Maito Gai enter the room with a flying kick, landing on a turtle that appeared from nowhere.

People like to dump on his bowl cut, but honestly it looks fine in real life. Reminds me of Bruce Lee, which was probably intentional, but I don't remember.

Then...Team 13.

"Shimoda Daisuke, Yamada Hisako and Nakamura Nichiren," Okawa rattled off.

"Yes!" Hisako threw her hands up in happiness and then gave me a tackle hug. Which I returned. Because...I like Hisako, and I like hugs. I didn't get many hugs since I was reincarnated, so this was really nice.

"Sensei: Hatake Kakashi."

Wait.

Uh...you know, this might be a golden opportunity. I mean, canon was screwed already just because I'm friends with Naruto, so it's not like there's much reason to cry that canon is getting messed up. I mean, if I can help, I will.

The only real issue is my Charisma being below average.

But that's just a few inventory items away from being rectified. An amulet, a ring, a shirt, whatever.

Quest Added: Shinobi, Assemble!

Meet your Jounin Sensei.

Right now, my main concern is...helping my teammates survive the wait for Kakashi to finally show up.

* * *
Name: Shimoda Daisuke.

Health: 220.
Chakra: 85.

Strength: 4
Perception: 5
Endurance: 5
Charisma: 4 (+3)
Intelligence: 10
Agility: 5
Luck: 10

Taijutsu: 66
Melee Weapons: 15
Ranged Weapons: 29
Genjutsu: 29
Ninjutsu: 29
Speech: 30 (+6)
Pick Lock: 17
Fuinjutsu: 27
Medicine: 27
Survival: 33
Chakra Control: 92.

Perks:
Taijutsu Enthusiast
Comprehension
* * *
Author's Note: Well, at the time of this writing, I haven't posted anything so I've stayed the course. So far. A key difference between this draft and the first one is the presence of Hisako's mother. In the first draft, both of her parents left her to return to active duty but here, only the father did. I made this choice because I wanted a Hisako that wasn't so starved by loneliness that her crush on Daisuke became her single, defining feature.

Basically, I gave her a boost to her mental health so I could have a more dynamic character. Hope it works!

Second key difference, and likely the one you all are more interested in, was that Daisuke got out of the academy really quickly. Much faster than the first draft. The reason for that is that...well, he could've gotten out the first time and chose not too. Here, I had him take steps to remove himself from an unhealthy situation and then do things that were actually productive. All the books he read took a long time to actually plow through and were a lot more productive than the training he would've done normally. Also, Daisuke kept sparring with Hisako and because she's in a much healthier place, doesn't necessarily mind that he's ahead of her.

Hope you all enjoyed!

Shout out to Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Ventari, PbookR, Seij, ChristobalAlvarez, Apperatus, EPiCJB19, Seeking Raven, Handwran, Russel Beatrous and Richard Whereat, your continued support blows me away. Thank you so much.

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
Last edited:
Chapter 3: The Bell Test
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *
Seal Learned: Storage Seals.

How does it work? It's a mystery for the ages! No one quite knows...except for you. You can now create your own storage seals.

I mean, I could explain how it works right now, but I've got more reading material to get to. Those bombs aren't going to learn how to make themselves.

Seal Learned: Explosive notes.

Add a little boom, a little pop, a little explosive energy to your combat encounters! You can now create your own explosive notes.

Again, really sad that I don't get EXP from learning Jutsu but then, game balance really ruins things some times; if I could just get EXP from any jutsu I learn, especially if I could make them? I'd be a god before the end of the year.

I'm only halfway joking.

It took me several hours to read both of those scrolls and Kakashi still hadn't shown. I mean, I knew he was going to be late, but this really is annoying.

"He's seriously still not here," I said, shaking my head.

"Nope," Hisako replied with irritation. She had been spending the time with a whetstone, sharpening her kunai. Unusually, she carried two and I think she wanted to dual-wield them. Wasn't going to turn my nose up at it, it wasn't that impractical for a pair of knifes...but if she were going to dual wield swords, she and I were going to have a debate.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/5.

"Yeah," Nichiren finally spoke up with a laugh; a short, light sound he made as if he were somewhat short on breath. He had been tightly holding his hands together, tight enough that his hands had gone white on several occasions that I could see. "I wonder what's keeping him? Hope he's okay."

"Wait, Hatake Kakashi?" Hisako asked, her voice lighting up in recognition. "My parents told me a bit about him. Apparently, he's late to everything and always comes up with the dumbest excuses."

"Your parents used to work with him?" I asked curiously.

"Not with him," Hisako clarified, pulling her red jacket tighter across her chest. "They just heard about him. They let him get away with it because he's supposed to be amazing."

"Well that's good," Nichiren said, adjusting his glasses with a smile that seemed...a little odd. Like it was too wide.

Charisma Check Failed: 4/5.

Well, at least the failures are getting less frequent. Still, I'm going to need to find Charisma improving items. As soon as I collect my first paycheck, I'm going on a shopping spree...no, I'm getting an apartment and then I'm going on a shopping spree.

Actually, wouldn't I be able to figure out his deal by using Psychology?

Medicine Check Failure: 27/30.

Well, that's annoying. Still, that opens up another avenue to solving problems. I like having more options to fix stuff; you get enough of them and your poor decisions don't matter which is the whole point of RPG's having checks everywhere: player convenience.

"Hey, are you okay?" Hisako asked with a frown. "You seem a little nervous."

Thank you, that explains a lot.

"Nervous?" Nichiren's voice got oddly high there for a moment. "No, no, I'm not nervous. Why would you think I'm nervous?"

"Because you obviously are," Hisako pointed out, her lips pressed into a thin line. "And that's making me nervous. So what's the deal?"

"I'm just…" Nichiren took a deep breath. "Hoping to make a good first impression, you know? I'm the first Ninja in my family so I hope Kakashi Sensei likes me."

I believed him.

Charisma Check Failed: 4/8.

Shut up, game. I guess I don't. Or is the check to tell that he's telling the truth and that there's more to the story? See, failed checks don't even tell me and that's not even getting into the perception checks, which don't tell you they failed until the thing you didn't notice shows up and jump-scares you.

Hisako hummed. "Well, just take a deep breath and relax. Worrying about it isn't going to help anyone."

"Right," Nichiren nodded, taking another breath. "Right, you're right. This won't help anyone."

Nichiren was breathing and Hisako turned up to me. "Are you still reading up there?"

"Nah, I finished," I replied, holding up the explosive note scroll. "You want to read it now? Learn how to make bombs?"

"Nah, I already know how," Hisako answered with a smile. "Why don't you come join us?"

"Can I read it?" Nichiren asked. "Maybe that'll help sooth my nerves."

"Sure," I said, jumping up on my desk and skipping down to the front row where my two teammates were sitting. I took a seat next to Hisako and tossed Nichiren the scroll. "Here you go."

Nichiren bungled the catch, causing the scroll to jump one, twice and then three times out of his grasp before he snatched it with both hands. "Thankyouverymuch."

"Not a problem," I replied. "It's a library scroll, so be careful with it."

"I will," Nichiren said, rapidly unfurling the scroll and drinking in the contents with his eyes.

"So is that from the second floor?" Hisako asked with curiosity. "I haven't been to the library since the exam yesterday."

"That right," I replied. "The one restricted to Genin and up."

I honestly can't wait to see what's on the Chunin and Jounin floors. The number of skill books would probably make me start salivating.

"Figures," Hisako nodded. "I don't know how you lived there, they had nothing interesting on the public floor."

"Well, their selection of fiction wasn't that bad," I debated. "They had some nice adventure novels in there."

"I guess." Hisako shrugged. She looked at the door, her pony tail swishing with the momentum and flipping back as she turned to me. "I'm not much of a fiction girl."

"Oh, then what do you like to read?" I asked.

"Well I like…" She stopped for a second. "You know, I like training and stuff. No time to just read for the sake of it."

Charisma Check Failed: 4/6.

Shut up game, it's obvious she doesn't want to talk about something. I just can't quite see why and without that little bit of knowledge, I can't get her to open up. It doesn't really matter if she doesn't want to tell me or not, though. She can have her secrets.

"What kind of training do you do?" I asked.

"I've been doing a lot of work with these," Hisako answered, drawing her kunai, twirling them around her fingers before grasping them with a snap. A smile had painted itself across her lips. "Dual-wielding kunai."

"Nice," I nodded. "How does it work?"

"Well, it's all about misdirection," Hisako replied, standing up on the desk. She performed a few mock-swings with her blades held reverse-grip. "You perform an obvious strike with your off hand or block an attack and with your main hand, you go in for the kill."

I nodded, watching her go. "So are you going to have a ton of kunai on you at all times? You might have to throw a couple while we're on mission."

"Actually, I really don't like throwing kunai," Hisako replied, getting back down off her desk. "They're slower than shuriken so it's really only useful if you've got an explosive note tied to it and they're distracted. Or you're preparing a trap."

"Right, but a kunai isn't that good for cutting either, right?" I asked with interest.

"No, it's not," Hisako nodded in agreement. "I'd rather have a pair of actual knives."

"Trench knives?"

"Yeah!" Hisako replied, nodding again, this time with more enthusiasm. "I saw a pair of really cool ones in the store when my Mom and I went window shopping, but Mom wants me to buy them with my mission money."

Smart. Get her to value them by making her earn them. "How much were they?"

Hisako's enthusiasm immediately faded, her shoulders slouching. "Over a hundred and twenty thousand ryo."

I whistled. "Must be some knives."

"Yeah," Hisako nodded with a grin. "They had the same black steel we use in our kunai, but they had red leather on the grips and when they shined, it's like I could hear the light coming off the tip. So cool!"

"Is red your favorite color?" I asked.

"Oh! Uh, yeah," Hisako immediately looked a little taken aback. "Why do you ask?"

"You're jacket's red and the leather on the knives you want are also red," I replied with a shrug. "Just curious."

"Yeah, it's my favorite," Hisako replied. "What about you?"

"Blue," I replied with a nod.

"How come you aren't wearing it?" Hisako asked, looking at my wardrobe up and down.

Yeah, I was wearing a white t-shirt, a pair a light tan shorts and the blue sandals that everyone in Konoha wore, so they didn't count. "I haven't had the chance to go shopping yet."

"Why not?" Hisako asked with a frown.

"No cash."

She blinked. "Oh. Right, sorry. I forgot you were an orphan."

"It's okay," I shrugged, a frown etching itself on my face. "Once I've done some missions, I'll be able to afford some better stuff."

I miss my old family.

Grieve later, Daisuke.

"Maybe we can go out shopping together?" Hisako offered, looking at me with her face pointed towards the floor.

Not on first paycheck, that's already spoken for. But later? "Sure, maybe sometime."

Charisma Check Failure: 4/7.

Shut up, game.

"Something wrong?" Hisako asked, looking concerned. "You look annoyed."

"Oh, it's nothing," I answered, a little flustered that I was being called out. "Just remembered that I have something to take care of as soon as possible."

Speech Check Success: 30/20.

"Oh, yeah, I hate it when I forget stuff," Hisako nodded. "Like yesterday, I forgot to tell Mom that I passed the exam when I got home because I was too excited."

"Yeah, it's annoying," I agreed.

Actually, speaking of gear, I was going to need to get as heavily armored as I could as fast as possible. According to the game manual, the maximum Damage Reduction that I could get was 85%. So if I couldn't find anything in the store that would bring me up to that standard, I was going to have to make my own. And fast. Before the C-rank curse kicks in and we get thrown into an A-rank mission for some reason.

Hisako looked over to the door and groaned in disgust. "Where is he?"

"Running late," I replied.

"But this is ridiculous," Hisako whined. "It's been like an hour!"

"You think he's going to cut into our lunch break?" Nichiren asked over his scroll.

"We're not in school anymore," I replied with a raised eyebrow. "You can have lunch whenever you want."

"Oh." Nichiren frowned and buried himself deeper in his scroll. "Okay."

Charisma Check Failure: 4/5.

See, I actually do understand where I went wrong there; I wasn't trying to use my Speech skill, so the game defaulted to Charisma and I wound up letting that out more harshly than I intended.

Skills are active, SPECIAL Stats are passive. I figured that out a while ago, but I apparently, I need the reminder.

Hisako kicked her feet up on the desk and leaned back in her chair. She dug out her whetstone and started sharpening her shuriken now that her kunai could split a hair down the middle.

As for me...I didn't have any more reading material and I was starting to get bored. So I dug out my notebook and started making notes.

See, learning how to make a storage scroll gave me an idea. It stored things, so I wonder if you could put two things into the seal and then have them come out of the scroll mixed. Like putting iron ore and raw carbon into a scroll and have them come out as a steel alloy. Because if I could do that, then there's some nutty stuff I'll have in the pipeline.

First, I need to see if a mixture is possible, so obviously, the seal has to be centered around two input circles and an output circle. From there, the storage scroll...does...okay hang on.

No skill checks?

Hm. I guess that's what the game manual meant when it said I had to do it the hard way.

I started making notes, possible set ups, methodology. Just working on putting two things together. Until...wait, that almost makes sense. I'm...no, I got it. A mixing seal.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/8.

Seal Learned: Mixing Seal.

With the power of invention, you invented a seal that adds two and two together! You can now create a seal that mixes things together.

Nice!

It was then that the door opened and in walked Hatake Kakashi.

He looked just how I remembered him, just in real life this time. Face mask, Jounin uniform. Hitai-ate over his Sharingan Eye. His hair stuck up.

"You must be Kakashi-sensei," Nichiren stood up rapidly and bowed. "It's good to finally meet you."

Hisako pulled her feet off of her desk and also stood up, bowing. I followed suit, if only because I wanted to be polite to one of the coolest mentor figures I've ever known in the realm of fiction.

Of course, this wasn't fiction any more.

"Well, it's nice to meet all of you," Kakashi replied with an eye-smile. "I'm Hatake Kakashi, and I've been assigned to be your Jounin-sensei. Now, if you'll all follow me up to the top."

He's being oddly friendly.

We followed him up to the Academy's roof. He sat us down on the AC unit, a crate and a pipe that went up over the roof while he took a seat on the wall. "Now, we're going to introduce ourselves."

He pointed to Nichiren. "Starting with you. I want to know what you like, what you hate, your dreams for the future, and any hobbies you have."

"Uh," Nichiren looked like he was going to break out in a cold sweat from his seat on the crate. "I'm Nakamura Nichiren. I like my parents and reading. And playing Shinobi's and Shuriken."

That sounds like a D&D analogue. Please let that be a D&D analogue. I miss D&D.

"What I hate?" Nichiren phrased, looking up like he was trying to find the answer in the clouds. "I don't really hate...much. I don't like being scared. And I want to be a Medic Nin! Way too many people die because they don't have a doctor on hand!"

Kakashi was slowly nodding along, his eye half-closed. "Hobbies?"

"...I like reading and playing Shinobi and Shuriken," Nichiren repeated, looking down.

"Right. You in red?" Kakashi pointed to Hisako.

She stood up from the AC unit. "My name is Yamada Hisako. I like my parents, training and using the Tree-Climbing technique. I don't like that my dad is on a long term mission and I don't like people who are tardy."

Kakashi hummed and his eye-smile changed a little bit, but I can't put my finger on how, exactly.

Charisma Check failed: 4/6.

Shut up, game.

"I want to join ANBU Black Ops," Hisako finished, folding her arms with a nod. "So I need to be the best."

"And what are your hobbies?" Kakashi asked with an odd cheer in his voice.

"Training," Hisako replied with conviction.

"Work doesn't count," Kakashi chided. "Come on, what do you do when you're not being a Shinobi?"

She looked down and then left to Nichiren, and then right to me. I just shrugged. "I, uh...I like...I like writing poetry."

Her face was beet red.

"Maybe you could turn that into a career," Kakashi offered, before turning to me. "How about you?"

"Name's Shimoda Daisuke," I began. "I like Chakra and I like figuring things out. I don't like upsetting people or dying. Dreams for the future involve amassing a fortune and retiring comfortably."

Speech Check failure: 30/35.

"You don't like dying," Kakashi chuckled. "Well, I think that's something we all have in common, don't we?"

Well, it's better than failing at Charisma. Again.

Kakashi didn't even stand up, his just narrowed slightly.

"I'm Hatake Kakashi," He began and I felt a cold shiver run down my spine. "Things I like? Things I hate? I'm not going to tell you that. Dreams for the future? Never really thought about it. As for my hobbies? I've got a lot of hobbies."

That was it. Hisako glared at Kakashi, but didn't say anything. I was kind of annoyed too, I wanted to see how he'd justify reading the Icha Icha series.

"You may think that you're Shinobi because you passed your exams like good little academy students," Kakashi continued, that uncomfortable feeling getting stronger. "But you aren't Shinobi. No, you've still got to pass my test. The bell test. So you'll meet me tomorrow at training ground three. Be there at five AM sharp...and don't eat breakfast. Because if you do...you'll throw up."

Then the feeling faded.

"See you tomorrow!" Kakashi bade us farewell with an eye-smile and a wave, before disappearing in a body-flicker.

Quest Updated: Shinobi, Assemble!

Completed: Meet your Jounin Sensei.

Pass the Bell Test.

Right. The bell test. See, I've got an unfair advantage here because I understand the test's actual purpose but frankly, he annoyed me. So I'll try to take the bells the hard way just so I can go 'neener-neener, Kakashi, your test sucks'.

...well, I'll only try like once. Maybe twice. Because the only way I'm actually going to be able to get the bells from him is because he's going easy on us and if he doesn't want me to get the bells solo, it's going to be way harder.

Much easier to pass the test by going along with what it's actually trying to do.

Still, what's a game without a self-imposed challenge?
* * *​

Luckily for me, the Orphanage had leftovers. Some Beef Teriyaki, Shrimp and Noodles, stuff like that. I didn't need to eat, but the other two did and Kakashi was going to be late. At least, it stood to reason that he was going to be late so we'll be nice and hungry.

If I remember correctly, he always went to the memorial stone in training ground three, which made him late. Something about his Genin team? I don't know, I never watched Shippuden, though I really wish I did.

Before I went home last night, I scouted the area. The memorial stone wasn't even inside the Training Ground, and was far enough away from the entrance that I had felt comfortable doing what I was about to do. Which was good.

What I really wished I could do was come up with a seal that functioned as a proximity alarm. I could place it on the memorial stone and if someone were standing there, I'd get alerted. I've got no idea where I'd even begin if I wanted to make one, though.

I got there an hour early. The orphanage had some old survival supplies donated to help keep the kids alive in case of invasion and I was allowed to borrow them. The portable stove was really nice, as were the pans. I wanted to make another storage seal variant that warmed up it's contents, but…

You do not know that jutsu.

The only way I could think of doing it was by sealing up a heating jutsu and then combining it with the meal, but I don't know any fire techniques. The explosive notes don't count, those are almost entirely smoke and shock-waves.

So here I was, pulling a portable stove out from a storage scroll I made and getting to work reheating the meals.

Something else I did last night was I gave myself a refresher on some of the tricks I came up with over the last few years. I remembered reading about the puppeteers from Suna, who used Chakra Strings to guide puppets around to fight for them.

Since I already had the strings, it gave me plenty of inspiration for a plan to get the bells, especially once I figured out how to turn them invisible; still a little annoyed I got no EXP from that but whatever.

Chakra: 84/85.

Chakra: 83/85.

I looked over my shoulder, looking for anything that might be watching. Any sign of Kakashi?

No perception check?

Obviously there's a lot I'm not seeing. But...let's just look for Kakashi.

Perception Check success: 5/5.

At least I can confirm that no, Kakashi is not here yet.

Something I knew I could do was I could use the storage scroll I had to keep the smell of the food heating back up contained by holding it up to the stove. I didn't want it getting away.

After a while, the food was nice and reheated, though I'm going to learn a fire jutsu for next time because keeping the smell down was stressful. Just holding the scroll up and slowly storing the vapor inside while keeping a look out for masked ninja looking to ruin our day made it hard not to start hyperventilating or something.

Survival Check Success: 33/30.

Still, it was looking delicious and I couldn't wait for my teammates to try it.

Finally, Hisako showed up.

"Daisuke?" She looked surprised. "Why did you bring breakfast? Do you want to throw up?"

Choose your words carefully, Daisuke. "I think Kakashi-sensei is going to be late again."

Speech Check Success: 30/15.

Yes!

Hisako blinked. Then her eyes widened. "Wait, that actually makes sense. Get us hungry to make the test as hard as possible."

"My thoughts exactly," I replied. "Now grab what you want, but leave enough for Nichiren."

"What about you?" Hisako asked.

"This is just leftovers, I had plenty last night," I answered, keeping the scroll up.

"Last night?" Hisako asked in surprise.

Whoops. "Oh, uh...heh. Look, I have a kekkei-genkai. It lets me not eat for very long periods of time."

Speech Check Success: 30/20.

Charisma Check Failure: 4/7.

"You have a kekkei-genkai?" Hisako asked with surprised, pulling up a seat and grabbing one of the plates I had. "How come you've never told me?"

"I don't know, it just didn't seem important," I answered. "But seriously, since I'm not hungry, you and Nichiren need to keep your strength up."

I handed her some chopsticks and she scooped up some of the delicious beef with some noodles.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

Soon after, Nichiren showed up.

"Wait, you guys are eating?" Nichiren asked, looking panicked. "Are you guys crazy? We're going to get in trouble!"

"No, Kakashi-sensei just said we'd throw up," Hisako pointed out. "Not that we weren't supposed to. Besides, he's going to be late to make the test harder."

Nichiren froze for a second. "...you mean he told us not to eat breakfast so we'd be doing the test hungry?"

"Yup," Hisako nodded.

"That's just mean," Nichiren pointed out, sitting down and taking the offered plate and chopsticks. He had the shrimp and beef, with the noodles. "Have you already eaten, Daisuke?"

"Yeah, I don't need to eat," I replied with a smile. "Seriously, dig in. This is for you guys."

Speech Check Success: 30/15.

I'm assuming that the harder checks are when I'm trying to negotiate, with higher stakes bringing higher checks? Because so far, I haven't really failed any speech checks...I can communicate like a normal human being.

"Wow," Nichiren said. "Thank you."

"I know, right?" Hisako replied. "Daisuke's awesome."

Well, now I'm blushing. "Thanks, guys. But eat fast, I don't want there to be any evidence."

They did, scarfing it down like rabid dogs who just got their first meal in days. They finished, and I stowed everything in the storage scroll, leaving not a trace.

"How long do you think he'll be this time?" Hisako asked, yawning and stretching out her arms above her head.

"Hopefully a few hours so we have time to..." Nichiren was interrupted by just the biggest yawn. "To digest. You know?''

We were right.

"Hello, students!" Kakashi eye-smiled, waving at us as he entered the Training Ground from the road. "Sorry I'm late, there was a cat stuck up a tree."

"It took you six hours to help a cat stuck up in a tree?" Hisako asked incredulously.

"It had a death grip on that branch," Kakashi responded shamelessly.

Come on, game. Even I know he's lying to us.

Charisma Check Success: 4/1.

Shut up, game.

"Now, for the test," Kakashi said, directing us further into the training ground.

We came to that famous spot with three wooden posts dug into the ground. It was here, that Team 7 proved themselves worthy to be Shinobi by demonstrating the teamwork necessary to fight as Shinobi of Konoha, by feeding a Naruto who got tied up at the post.

I don't want anyone to get tied up at the post, so we're going to get those bells.

"I have in my hand two bells," Kakashi started. "The test is simple; get the bells from me. Anyone who fails to get the bells will never be Ninja."

"There's only two bells!" Nichiren pointed out with alarm.

"That's right, Nichiren-kun." Kakashi eye-smile, bouncing the bells into his palm. "So no matter what happens today, one of you is becoming a civilian. Forever."

I know it's a lie, but...I turned to Hisako. "Can he do that?"

"He can, actually," Hisako said. "If Kakashi-sensei deems us completely unfit for service as Shinobi, we can be immediately discharged."

Unfit like mentally ill and a danger to others and themselves? Makes sense.

"So you best try hard to get the bells," Kakashi replied. "At noon, we'll break for lunch."

He held up two lunch boxes.

"So, who doesn't get to eat?" I asked with a frown.

"The one who does the worst will be tied to that post," Kakashi pointed to the post. "And will have to watch the others eat in front of them."

"Well that sucks," I said, folding my arms.

"Well, then I'd try not to be the one who gets tied to a post."

How about we finish this test before noon?

"So," Kakashi started, tossing the boxes on the ground next to the post. "Test starts now."

Both Hisako and Nichiren ran off to opposite sides of the forest, hiding in the trees like we were instructed too in our tactics courses. I passed my tactics class with flying colors, thanks Intelligence. So while I didn't just run off like they did...I had a plan.

Still pretty proud that I figured out those chakra strings from memory alone. They'll be very, very useful going forward, even if I never build a puppet.

"You seem confident," Kakashi said, looking at me with a half-closed eye. "Then again, I suppose you would be for a Genin who graduated three years early."

"I think I can get those bells from you, yeah," I said with a grin. "I don't think it'll be that hard."

I'm not trying to kill him, I'm just trying to get the bells from him.

Charisma Check Success: 4/4.

Wait, why? I wasn't really trying to do anything, I was just saying...

"Oh you don't," Kakashi asked, taking a breath. "Then I guess I'll have to use desperate measures."

Crap.

He reached into his pocket and before I could even raise my hands to defend myself, he drew out...his Icha Icha book and opened it right in front of me. The horror.

I'm being sarcastic.

"Whenever you're ready," Kakashi said with a dramatic sigh.

Chakra: 80/85.

Chakra: 79/85.

So I let the invisible strings flow out across the grass and I started stepping forward, then to the side in an orbit around Sensei. Slow and steady. I wasn't in a rush, the drain was just my chakra being outside my body and not being expended, per se.

The real question is, should I grab the bells? Sure, I could grab them and give them to Hisako and Nichiren but the point of the test was to demonstrate teamwork. If I just do it for them, would the point of the test be lost on them?

Maybe.

So...alright, fine.

But just to prove the point.

Chakra: 25/85.

Okay, I had very little chakra, but I was just going to be using Taijutsu. The strings were lightly touching the bells, now I just needed to distract him so I could seize them. Anything else I need to keep in mind?

Since my records from the Academy are from when I graduated three years ago, he has statistics from me when I was level 1. Now I'm level 5, so...I've got that going for me. I guess.

Chakra: 5/85.

With body flicker, I surged forward, delivering a spin kick to his head. As expected, he ducked and my invisible chakra strings snapped the bells right off of his belt and into my hand. I landed on the grass behind Kakashi, sliding on the grass and slowly spinning to face him.

"You'll have to try harder than that," Kakashi said with an eye-smile.

Did he get the bells from me? No. No, he did not. I brought them up where he could see them, letting them dangle from my fingers. "You sure?"

His eye was bugging out of its socket. "Well. Congratulations, you passed the test."

...wait, I just had a fabulous idea. "Cool."

I tossed the bells back to him.

He caught them. "What?"

"Now Nichiren and Hisako have a chance to get the bells too," I replied with a grin.

"No they don't," Kakashi said.

"Sure they do," I replied. "The test is to get the bells from you. It wasn't to be the first to get the bells."

Charisma Check Success: 4/4.

Speech Check failure: 30/40.

At least I'm getting a break here.

"You...can't just…" Kakashi was actually speechless, trying to make words come from his mouth and failing.

That's hilarious!

"Besides," I said, sliding up to him and continuing in a low voice. "We both know that the test is on teamwork."

Then I body-flickered out of sight.

* * *​

Survival Check Success: 33/30.

Tracking Hisako was proving to be a no-go. She liked using the Tree Walking technique so she didn't leave tracks in the soil. But Nichiren's footprints were clear, disturbing the dirt in clear sandal prints.

"Hey!" I looked up and there was Hisako, sticking to a tree-branch upside down.

"Hey, I'm glad I caught you!" I said with a smile and a wave.

"Yeah...what was that?" Hisako pointed at the clearing where I had fought Kakashi.

"What was what?" I asked.

"You got the bells from him!" Hisako demanded. "Then you gave them back! What gives?"

I can't tell her what the test was on. That's part of my unwritten agreement with Kakashi, the one that exists primarily in my head. "It wasn't challenging enough. I kind of did something sneaky."

"You're a Ninja," Hisako snapped incredulously, dropping from the branch to land in front of me. "Sneaky is what we do!"

"Yeah, but it didn't feel fair," I replied with a shrug.

Charisma Check Success: 4/4.

Speech Check Failure: 30/35.

Well, she bought it. But she wasn't happy with it.

"Who cares if it's fair?" She threw her hands up in the air.

"I do!"

"That's just going to get you killed!"

"This isn't a life or death situation."

"But we're training for life or death situations," Hisako pointed out with a glare. "The training's no good if you aren't taking it seriously!"

I shrugged. "Point. Now lets find Nichiren."

"Wait, but there's two bells," Hisako pointed out. "We can't take him with us."

"Why not?" I asked with a raised eyebrow. "He deserves a shot too."

"Because of how nervous he is," Hisako replied. "With how weak his mental state is, he'd probably freeze up the second we went into a real combat encounter and then he'd probably die."

She had a point. "Yeah, but I'd bet all new Shinobi are like that. That's what the training's for, isn't it?"

Charisma Check Failure: 4/5.

Speech Check Failure: 30/35.

"Not like that." Hisako's frustration had hit a peak. "He looked like he was going to pass out from being spoken to yesterday!"

"Okay, but he still deserves a shot to pass," I replied. "Seriously, you can't just make that decision for him. That's Sensei's call, not yours."

Charisma Check Failure: 4/7.

Speech Check Success: 30/20.

She huffed in irritation. "Fine. Let's go get him so he can fail on his own."

"Thank you."

She can be mad all she wants, but we either pass as a team or we fail as a team. I'm surprised she hasn't picked up on that being the point of the exercise, but then, no one in Team 7 did either and only picked up on it when they fed Naruto against Kakashi's instructions.

So I can shelve my own frustration. For now.

We did eventually catch up to Nichiren and the state we found him in...did not help his case at all.

He was curled up in a ball against a tree crying his eyes out. His glasses were on the ground next to him, so I picked them up and folded them up.

"Hey," Hisako gently kicked him. "What's the matter?"

"Wait," Nichiren said, his unfocused eyes blinking. "You're both alive?"

"Oh. Must've gotten hit with the Hell Viewing Technique," I surmised with a nod. I did not know how to do the Genjutsu, but I have read about it. Extensively. Since the entire field of Genjutsu made me so uncomfortable, I think I'm mostly going to be creating defenses against it.

"That was a Genjutsu?" Nichiren asked, his jaw on the ground. "I can't believe that I'd be so stupid!"

Hisako took a breath. "Yeah, it's pretty bad. First time my Mom hit me with it, I didn't come out of my room for a whole day."

"What did you see?" I asked curiously.

"Just you two dead," Nichiren said. "And it was my fault because I wasn't ready to be a Ninja."

"I think you should try to pass the test first," I told him. "Then you'll be able to tell for sure."

"But," Nichiren started, gulping. "That's the thing. I'm not ready to be a Ninja."

"Why would you think that?" Hisako asked sweetly.

"Because," He took a deep breath. "Because I cheated. On my exams."

Hisako and I looked at each other. Then back at him.

"How?" Hisako asked incredulously.

"I made a soldier pill at home," Nichiren answered. "I didn't have enough time to train Taijutsu, so I used that to pass that portion of my exam. I only passed the shuriken exam because of luck."

"You used a homemade soldier pill," Hisako echoed.

"Yeah," Nichiren replied. "My Taijutsu's awful."

Hisako looked at me and pointed at him. "He's a genius."

"I am?" Nichiren repeated in confusion.

"You are," Hisako replied. "You snuck a soldier pill into the academy and used it to pass an exam with instructors who are trained to see this sort of thing. How did you do that?"

"It was a small thing," Nichiren said. "Kept it hidden behind one of my teeth and crunched on it when I needed it. But I still cheated, so I don't deserve to be Ninja."

Hisako face-palmed. "Why do I have to keep explaining this?"

"Explain what?" Nichiren asked.

"Here's your glasses, by the way," I said, passing those onto him.

"Oh, thanks."

"We're ninja," Hisako said with great emphasis. "Sneaky? Underhanded? Fighting Dirty? Cheating? That's our job. That's what we do. We. Are. Shinobi. Nichiren, you shouldn't feel bad. By sneaking a Soldier Pill through the academy, you proved you were more Ninja than almost anyone else who graduated yesterday. More than Daisuke, anyway."

"True," I nodded. "Very true."

"How is Daisuke not a Ninja?" Nichiren asked. "He graduated three years early. Three whole years!"

"He got the bells from Kakashi-sensei," Hisako pointed out. "Then handed them back to him because he felt bad about using a dirty trick!"

"What was the trick?" Nichiren asked.

"I'll tell you later," I replied flatly.

"But...but…" Nichiren asked with his eyes looking even wider in those abnormally thick glasses. "I don't understand...I mean...okay. Fine. Fine. Whatever. Another chance for us other two, I guess...but I'm confessing."

"Why?" Hisako asked.

"Because the point of the test was to make sure I had could hold my own," Nichiren replied. "Shinobi or not, I still need to be on the level with you two, or I'll just hold you back."

"You know we can do remedial training, right?" Hisako asked, her eyebrow raised and her hands on her hips. "Seriously, it's not the end of the world."

"But Sensei should know," Nichiren replied. "So he knows that I need more training than you other two, or that I need to go back to the Academy."

"Don't they do tutors at the Academy?" I asked.

"I don't know," Hisako shrugged. "But fine. Whatever. Just at least try to get the bells. Put that clever brain of yours to good use."

"But you two earned the right to be here," Nichiren said. "You shouldn't be held back because of me."

"If we lose to you, then we deserve to go back to the Academy," Hisako replied, utterly deadpan.

"Okay. Daisuke, whatever you did, do you think it can work twice?"

"No," I shook my head. "Because he'll be keeping a hand on the bells this time."

"Okay, well," Nichiren began, adjusting his glasses and pushing them back up the bridge of his nose. "If that's the case, the only way any of us get those bells is by working together."

You're a genius.

"But there's only two," Hisako pointed out with a glare.

Perception Check failure: 5/7.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/6.

"What's the Will of Fire?" I asked her.

Charisma Check Failure: 4/8.

"The Will of Fire is Konoha," Hisako replied with confusion, looking at me. "We're like a massive family and we're all trying to work together to protect our home and love each other."

"What's a part of loving each other?" I asked with a small smirk.

Charisma Check Failure: 4/6.

"Making sure we don't get unqualified people killed," Hisako folded her arms.

"Like me," Nichiren piped up.

"No, you're fine," Hisako replied. "Well...the nervousness was just you not wanting to be found out, right?"

"Yeah," Nichiren nodded.

"So, you're fine."

Come on, one more try?

"So do we give up on our teammates in the middle of a mission?" I pressed. "Do we abandon them and let them die if they can't hack it?"

Speech Check Success: 30/15.

Charisma Check Failed: 4/5.

"No!" Hisako looked affronted. "We don't leave anyone behind. Our comrades are a part of the village, so we do our best to protect them and help them accomplish the mission. What the heck is wrong with you, Daisuke?"

"What was that last part?" I asked, my smirk returning.

"We do our best to protect them and…" Hisako froze, her eyes growing as wide as dinner plates. "...help them accomplish the mission."

She buried her head in her hands. "I'm such an idiot!"

"So this really is just a test of our teamwork?" Nichiren asked, blinking. "That...actually explains a lot about this test actually."

"How did I not see that?" Hisako asked. "My parents always go on and on about protecting your teammates and making sure to never leave a man behind."

"I guess letting Nichiren fail is one way to protect him," I said with a shrug.

Charisma Check Failed: 4/6.

Hisako froze and glared at me. "Daisuke!"

"I'm just saying," I replied more than a little annoyed that I failed yet another check. "You didn't think he could make it so you thought the best way to not let him die would be to let him fail. You were trying to protect him."

"But you didn't have to say that in front of him!" Hisako barked, pointing at Nichiren, a little red in the cheeks.

Oh, I embarrassed her. Whoops.

"I am not offended," Nichiren shook his head, standing up. "It makes complete sense and I'm glad you didn't want me to die."

"Sorry," Hisako replied.

"No, no. It's fine," Nichiren said. "But now we need to worry about getting those bells."

"Just one more thing," Hisako stopped Nichiren right there, turning to me. "How did you know what the test was about?"

Ah crap. How...oh, wait. Duh.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/6.

"It was kind of obvious," I replied with a shrug. "All the teams in Konoha are in threes. If this test actually played out the way Kakashi-sensei said it did, we'd have had a few cells running around as duos and that doesn't happen because there is no way he is the only person to use this as a test."

Hisako blinked. "Oh. Wait, yeah. That makes total sense."

"Wow," Nichiren shook his head. "It's a pretty cool test, though. Not going to lie."

"That's why you gave Sensei the bells back," Hisako stated, her eyes going wide. "Because you knew that wasn't the real test!"

"That's right," I nodded. "But I felt the need to make a point."

"So why didn't you tell us about it?" Hisako asked with a frown.

"Because that would undermine the point of the test," I replied. "And I wasn't kidding, Hisako; I do care about what's fair. I wanted you guys to actually pass the test fairly. We can be sneaky all we like, but if we can't count on each other to watch our backs, then we're not really Konoha Shinobi, then are we?"

Speech Check Success: 30/25.

Hisako got quiet, looking down on the ground and kicking the dirt.

Actually, to be honest, fairness is kind of subjective, isn't it?

"And I think you guys passed it," I continued. "Nichiren, you figured out that we needed to work together to get the bells and Hisako figured out that that was the point of the test. You got a plan for us, Nichiren?"

Nichiren adjusted his glasses. "Well, since this test is supposed to measure our teamwork, we all rush him and whoever gets the bells, if we do, passes them to the other two."

"Good," Hisako said, twirling her kunai and catching both of them with a snap. "Let's finish this test and go home."

* * *
The three of us quickly darted back to the clearing where we left Kakashi, and there he was, just standing there, reading his book.

"Ten ryo says that's just a clone," Nichiren whispered.

"If that's just a clone, then the real one is looking for us somewhere," Hisako whispered back.

Like right behind us?

Agility Check Failure: 5/8.

Perception Check Success: 5/5.

"There he is!" I pointed directly up since he was jumped up to the trees.

"There you all are!" Kakashi said with an eye smile. "I lost track of you, my cute little Genin."

Perception Check Failed: 4/6.

I blinked, and pointed at the clone down on the valley. "Nichiren, go rush the clone."

"Why?" He asked.

"Because we might be looking at a shadow clone," I replied.

I couldn't tell for sure.

Ninjutsu Check Failed: 29/65.

Charisma Check F-

Shut up, game.

"And you can't tree climb," Hisako pointed out.

"Good point," Nichiren said, before running off to go do just that.

Hisako and I looked at each other and we both started running up the tree.

As he closed distance on Kakashi, he made to grab my punch, but I used body flicker to dive to the side. As I collided with the other tree, I noted that it was starting to bend. I used that motion to launch myself back at my Sensei, who just caught Hisako's wrist and spun her off the tree trunk.

My breath caught, but she landed on a branch and started rushing back into the fight.

Lot of fight in that girl.

But as I came to Kakashi, I turned in mid-air to do a double kick right to his chest. He ducked, causing me to miss completely, but I collided with another truck, so I could jump right back at him like a pinball.

He jumped off the tree, and I caught the same, using chakra slide to spin around the trunk and then launch myself with the saved momentum back down at him. I passed Hisako on the way down, who simply jumped down from the branch.

With my fist cocked back, I prepared to lay one right into Sensei's masked face. He...simply leaned back, sticking upside down to the same branch...while I landed top-first into the ground.

100/220 hitpoints.

Left Arm Crippled.

Torso Crippled.

Ow.

"Daisuke!" Hisako screeched, running over to me. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," I said, breathless, noting that, yeah, I had broken ribs and a broken arm. Still stood up, even though it hurt like crazy. "I'm good. Landed wrong is all. Just need some rest."

"Absolutely not," Kakashi said, sounding deadly serious. "I heard those bones break, you're going to the hospital."

"Wasn't there something about my healing factor in my record?" I asked with annoyance.

Kakashi blinked. "No, there wasn't."

"Hm, must've been forgot about," I said with a shrug. "That's fine, I guess."

"How would they forget about something like that?" Kakashi asked.

"That last time I was in the hospital, the Kyuubi attacked," I answered. "They were swamped and I was fine...even though I should have severe brain damage."

Nichiren came running up to us. "Hey, you were right. That was a clone in the field. Wait, what happened?"

"Landed wrong and took a whole lot of fall damage," I replied with a shrug. "It's okay though, just need a nap. Did we pass the test?"

Kakashi blinked. "Yes, you passed the test. With flying colors."

"Yes!" Hisako cheered with a fist pump. Then she almost hugged me, but stopped.

I appreciated that.

Quest Updated: Shinobi, Assemble!

Completed: Meet your Jounin Sensei.
Completed: Pass the Bell Test.
Listen to your Sensei's lecture.


"So how long does your nap have to be?" Nichiren asked.

"Eh, about an hour," I replied with a shrug. "I brought a bedroll just in case."

"Where?" Kakashi asked seriously.

I took my other storage scroll from my belt and tossed it in the air, catching it on the flip.

"Okay," Kakashi sighed. "You have one hour. After that, if your bones are still broken, you're going straight to the hospital."

"Thank you," I said, unfurling the scroll and taking out the bedroll. "See you guys."
* * *​

"So...you didn't know about his healing factor, Sensei?" Hisako asked.

"No, I did not," Kakashi replied with a sigh. "I knew he was strong, fast, very intelligent and that he graduated three years early, but being able to mend a broken bone with a nap? That's...a new one."

"So, Sensei," Nichiren began. "Something you should know."

"You cheated," Kakashi said automatically.

"You overheard us in the forest?" Nichiren asked.

"I did," Kakashi replied. "But the rule is that if you cheat and you aren't caught, you keep your status as Genin."

"Wait, seriously?" Nichiren asked.

"Yes," Kakashi nodded. "We're Ninja. We are supposed to operate in shadows and lies. If a cheater gets through our proctors, that speaks very well of him. So...good job, Nichiren."

"Told you," Hisako muttered under her breath.

"But I will be running you into the ground to get your Taijutsu up to snuff," Kakashi warned with an eye-smile. "I hope you're ready."

"I am," Nichiren nodded with a smile. "I feel so much better."

"That's good," Kakashi looked over at the Genin sleeping on a blue bedroll, shaking his head. "I still don't know how he got the bells from me. It didn't look like he even tried to go for them."

"Wait, seriously?" Hisako asked. "That's crazy!"

"I know," Kakashi replied, pulling his book. "So, since he's sleeping, you guys have off time. Go ahead and eat lunch."

On cue, Hisako's stomach rumbled, but the two Genin looked at each other and then at Daisuke. "I don't know, I think Daisuke should get lunch."

"Yeah, same," Nichiren nodded.

"That's decent of you two," Kakashi said with pride in his eye. "He is the reason you both passed."

"Not just that, Sensei," Hisako started. "He made us breakfast this morning."

"He did?" Kakashi asked with a wide eye. "But I told you not to eat anything!"

"He kind of figured you'd be late again," Hisako replied. "My parents heard about you and how you're late to everything, then I told him and then he...guessed that you wouldn't show for a while."

"And he was right," Nichiren nodded.

Kakashi rubbed his eye, thinking horrific curses upon his reputation.
* * *​

Ah, I feel refreshed!

I pulled my book out and yeah. Full health! Nice!

Need to not take fall damage ever again.

"Well, glad to see you're awake," Kakashi said happily. "How's your arm?"

"Fantastic!" I replied, standing up quickly and giving it a good rotation and shadowboxed for effect. Then I thumped my ribs. "Good as new! Thanks for that."

"No problem," Kakashi's eye was bugging out again. "You keep that bedroll on you for missions, you understand?"

"You got it!" I said, putting my book back in my pocket.

"That's incredible," Hisako breathed out.

"I wish I could do that when I broke my thumb," Nichiren replied.

"You broke your thumb?" I asked curiously.

"I was five and dropped a box on it," Nichiren explained.

"That sounds like it sucked."

"It did!"

"Daisuke, if you'd put your bedroll away," Kakashi started. "There's something I need to show you."

I put the roll away quickly and we all followed Kakashi to the memorial.

It was a large, obsidian thing, shaped like a kunai that stabbed its way out of the earth as a reminder of those who gave their lives for Konoha.

"This is Konoha's memorial stone," Kakashi introduced it. "On it are the names of every Shinobi who has died protecting their comrades."

He said nothing and let us take in what we saw. I thought it was a nice touch that the stone was reflective. A way to say 'this could be you' or 'you're here because of them'. In a way, it's true.

"That is why my Sensei used the bell test to measure us as Ninja," Kakashi continued. "And his Sensei before him, and then his Sensei. Without teamwork, we are nothing. Those who would abandon their comrades are worse than trash and you are the first team that seemed to intrinsically grasp that concept."

"Daisuke figured out it was a test, though," Nichiren pointed out.

"Nichiren!" Hisako snapped.

"I'm just saying," Nichiren replied. "It kind of undermines the secret teamwork test if someone knows about it already. Right, Sensei?"

"This is true, Nichiren-kun," Kakashi nodded. "But you were going to confess to cheating because you didn't want to drag your team down. Hisako, your desire to see Nichiren fail was more about protecting him than ensuring your own success. And Daisuke? Your stunt in giving your teammates breakfast softened the conditions of the test...which is something preparation can do for an actual mission. So, good job."

"Thank you, Sensei." They must've told him while I was out.

"So congratulations, my little Genin," Kakashi told us with a thumbs up. "You're shinobi. We'll meet here again on Thursday, seven o'clock sharp."

"So, around eleven?" I asked.

I got little spike of killing intent. Just a little. Provoking someone like twenty levels higher than me is a bad idea, just a little note to self.

"No. Seven. In the morning," Kakashi said. "See you then."

Then he disappeared.

Quest Completed: Shinobi Assemble!

3,000 / 12,000 EXP.​
* * *

Author's Note: Third chapter. Again, all is going well. I haven't posted anything at the time of this writing, so I'm going to celebrate. I took a very slow approach to writing this chapter, instead of trying to get it all done in like an hour or so, and I'm really happy with how it turned out.

Decided to elaborate on Team 13 passing the bell test. I was torn as to whether or not Daisuke could actually get the bells from Kakashi. I decided in favor, just because he had the Chakra Strings and had the control needed to turn them invisible. But that wasn't the point of the test, so it really didn't do that much good.

One of my goals for the second draft is to use Nichiren and Hisako more. Since Daisuke's game abilities have been horrifically nerfed, I want to use them to do things that Daisuke could do normally in the first draft and let them be a much more coherent team.

For skills, 0-25 is Genin, 26-50 is Chunin, 51-75 is Jounin and 76-100 is Kage. Yes, I am saying Sakura has Kage-level chakra control to pull off Tsunade's Megaton Punch. For levels, this goes 1-10 is Genin, 11-20 is Chunin, 21-30 is Jounin, 31-40 is Kage and 41-50 is Sage of Six Paths. If you'll recall, Level 50 is when Daisuke achieved godhood by figuring out Creation release. Creation Release is now a perk, level 50, and requires the 5 basic elemental perks in order to learn.

Finally, the rules for Daisuke creating a new jutsu are as follows.
  • No EXP for Jutsu.
  • He must put in the effort to actually develop the jutsu. Once the jutsu is developed, his skills let him learn it.
  • He has to actually know how the effect of the jutsu is achieved. The most obvious way to do that is to learn a jutsu with the desired affect.
  • No EXP for Jutsu.
  • Modifying a Jutsu to suit his purposes has a lower skill check than creating one out of whole cloth.
  • No EXP for Jutsu.

I think that covers it.

Shout out too Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Ventari, PbookR, Seij, ChristobalAlvarez, Apperatus, EPiCJB19, Seeking Raven, Handwran, Russel Beatrous and Richard Whereat. Thank you for your continued support!

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Chapter 4: Missions and Quests.
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *
Bum-bum-bum-Bum!

Level 6!

Finally getting EXP again, which feels good. For my perk, I grabbed Educated like I had previously planned, which gave me two extra skill points. Spent 14 points on Taijutsu to bring it up to 80 and the last 3 on Fuinjutsu, bringing it up to 30.

0/15,000 EXP to level 7.

I thought it'd be good to start making some overtures toward my late game. Seals galore. I think for my next perk, I'll grab either Toughness or Taijutsu Enthusiast, depending on how Tsunade's megaton punch worked out, I might not need the percentage increase from Taijutsu Enthusiast. Then at level 10, I should be able to grab Chakra Seals so I can make seals without ink and activate them without blood.

D-Ranks, thankfully, were a great source of EXP. 1000 exp per mission. Sure they were boring and monotonous, but I was willing to take anything at this point.

The ryo I earned per mission didn't hurt either. In fact, I was actually happier about that than I was about the EXP, because it let me get an apartment.

I stood in my apartment's doorway with a giant grin on my face, rubbing my hands together with glee as I brought my key to the knob and opened the door, stomping inside like I owned the place.

Because I might as well have.

In front of me was the great room, no furniture. To the right along the wall was my apartment's balcony. On the left was the kitchen, divided from the great room by a half-wall bar. The kitchen was lined with cabinets and had a fridge, oven and stove. Sadly, it did not have a dishwasher but I'm only washing the dishes for one person so it's not that big of a deal.

Directly ahead was a mini hallway, a small closet at the end. To the right was the door to the bathroom, to the left was my bedroom. I moved my way over there and opened the door, coming to a room with a large window looking, and a small closet tucked away in the corner.

Of course, there was no furniture. Obviously. But that comes later.

First thing I did was open my storage scroll, place my bedroll on the floor and plopped on it with a huge smile on my face. My arms and legs were shaking as the tension of living in a communal home with a bunch of other kids evaporated from my body.

As far as everything goes, this is a massive improvement over the Orphanage already. In a way...it was even an improvement over my previous life as well.

...then I felt all sad all of a sudden.

I mean, I missed home. I did. I miss my parents, my siblings, some of my friends. But...I'm out and living on my own at twelve and learning how to be a Shinobi. I've also had time to get over the loss.

Still hurts though.

Nothing for it, though. Going back home, after all this time...I couldn't do it. I really couldn't do it. Going back to living at home trying to figure out how to leverage my skills into a boring, mundane career? I...why?

Why would I do that?

I mean, I would've taken the opportunity back in the womb, but this is like a giant restart button on my life, even if I didn't have the game system. So...I'm sorry, family. I miss you. I'll always miss you.

But I think getting back together really isn't in the cards.

...ah, I'm crying now.
* * *
4000 / 15,000 EXP until level 7.

Nichiren hit the ground face first.

Kakashi-sensei was having us spar. I didn't mind it too much, we needed Nichiren to be the absolute best that he could be, but it was kind of sad. The part where his repeated failures were amusing had passed.

"You really need to keep a better eye on your spacing," Kakashi instructed as Hisako helped pull Nichiren up to his feet. "Back up when Daisuke attacks, don't just stand there and block."

"Spacing," Nichiren gasped in deeply, checking his glasses to make sure they hadn't broken. They hadn't, but I didn't expect them too; he got issued Shinobi-grade glasses when he got made a Shinobi and those things were tough.

Still, you'd think that Konoha would've figured out contact lenses a while ago.

"You're not mindful of your footwork," Hisako said, looking him up and down to make sure he hadn't broken anything. He hadn't. "Like you forget that you can move your feet and so you just freeze."

Nichiren's talent for Taijutsu is nonexistent. But he at least needs to learn to dodge. I don't quite understand why he's having this problem, so I'm leaving it up to Kakashi and Hisako.

"Footwork," Nichiren repeated, nodding rapidly. "Right, need to move. Got it."

"Daisuke, why don't you take a break?" Kakashi offered. "Hisako, you take over."

"Yes, Sensei."

Hisako and Nichiren got into position and I took a seat on the ground next to where Kakashi stood.

We finished our D-rank mission this morning, running errands for some old lady. Gave me a thousand EXP and some extra cash to throw around, so now it was just training like this until we called it a day.

Nichiren waited, so did Hisako.

Hisako was a lot more patient than I was. She didn't even blink, while the nervous energy often prompted me to act quickly. The longer the fight goes on, the more chances that it can go sideways, you know?

His nerves gave out first.

He ran forward, throwing one punch, then a second. Hisako ducked under the first one and parried the second, planting a fist in his face and hopping back to avoid the hasty counter attack Nichiren launched, trying to do a round-house kick and getting nothing but air.

"See?" Hisako pointed to the ground between her and him. "Spacing."

"Daisuke doesn't really give me much room to move," Nichiren countered defensively.

Well, that's because if I'm letting you get away, something is wrong.

"Well, that's a problem to deal with later," Hisako replied. "Right now, we're working on you."

Attack, attack, attack!

I mean, we're only sparring so it's not that big of a deal but yeah. If we get into an actual fight, it won't be that big of an issue because I only need one punch.

Which is exactly how I like it.

Hisako charged in and threw a punch, which Nichiren ducked under. Hisako carried her momentum through for a sweeping kick to the feet, which Nichiren tried to dodge by flipping back into a handstand. I think he was going to follow it through to land on his feet, but Hisako kept up her momentum and span around a second time, landing a kick right in Nichiren's back.

"Alright, I think we're done for the day," Kakashi said, hopping over to Nichiren to help him up.

"What'd I do wrong that time?" Nichiren whined.

"You didn't jump her while she was spinning," I piped up from the sidelines. "You had time and I know you're fast enough, you could've gotten her while her back was turned."

"I was going to say he turned his back to me," Hisako replied, crossing her arms.

"Well, you did that too," I pointed out. "Twice."

She grunted in annoyance.

"I hope you won't be trying moves like that on an actual mission," Kakashi said. "Trying to be overly flashy without purpose will just get you killed."

"I won't, Sensei." Hisako quickly nodded. "I just thought it was cool move and we're sparring, so..."

"You have to take the training seriously," Kakashi replied, deadpan. "Or it doesn't do you much good."

Hey, Kakashi said what Hisako said to me during the bell test. Irony!

"Yes, Sensei."

"Alright, dismissed, everyone. Meet up here again tomorrow at six am."

The rest of us have taken to showing up at around nine so we didn't waste so much time, but that's going to bite us in the rear one day. Think I'll be punctual tomorrow. Just in case.

Actually, wait just one second.

I walked up to a tree and cocked a fist back.

Chakra Control Check Success: 92/80.

Taijutsu Check Success: 80/80.

My fist impacted the tree and it exploded. It was like I punched it with a claymore explosive and it shattered into a thousand tiny splinters.

I found myself laughing like a madman, throwing my fists up into the air with a triumphant cheer.

That's my early game taken care of. Now to work on Fuinjutsu so I can start scaling into the mid and lategame.

"What was that?" Hisako called behind me. I turned to her and she looked positively bewildered. Nichiren's mouth was on the floor and Kakashi's eye was bugging out of its socket.

"Oh, you guys know Tsunade-sama's incredible strength?" I asked with a grin.

"Yeah," Hisako slowly replied, dragging the world out.

"I figured out how she does it," I finished explaining. "Turns out, it's just a weaponized Tree-Walking technique!"

"What." Nichiren was flabbergasted.

"Seriously!" I insisted. "I don't recommend you try it, I nearly broke my hand the first time."
* * *​

Something I missed about my old world were the Malls and Supermarkets. The ones that had everything you could want all in one building, just because it seemed like a more efficient use of my time.

Still, at least there were stores. Right now, I was looking in the bargain section because I needed new clothes. I was basically running around in starting equipment and that felt like a black mark on my record as a gamer.

There were shirts, pants, ties, outfits. I saw a gray suit that I really wanted to buy just because I thought it looked cool, though I didn't because it was outside of my budget. The big thing that determined whether I bought something depended entirely on if it had any stats.

Most of the things I saw had no statistical value whatsoever.

I wasn't surprised. Realistically, this was the garbage section of clothing. I checked out armor earlier and it was all so far out of my price range that I had to stop myself from laughing. Ludicrously expensive. I'm guessing it's because most Jounin prefer to use the uniform they get for free and don't have to pay anything to maintain, meaning that any armor has to sell for a lot to be worth the risk of making it in the first place.

The only thing that was actually affordable was the mesh undershirt, and I'm going to go grab one as soon as I've finished assembling my wardrobe.

I parted the hangar for something I thought would look cool...no, that's a woman's blouse. Hm.

Let's check a different shelf.

I reached in, parted the overstuffed rack of clothes and found...it.

A blue jumpsuit. Long sleeved, no trimmings and zipped up the front. Gives me a DR of 5% and for a piece of non-armor clothing, that's really good. But the thing that really drew my eye was the bonus.

+2 Charisma.

Yup, right here. On a piece of clothing. A pretty expensive piece of clothing, as far as my budget goes but a piece of clothing nonetheless. Insta-buy.
* * *​

With this jumpsuit equipped, I definitely looked different.

I was looking in the mirror, admiring the change that came over me because of my choice in gear.

First off, I wasn't pale anymore. My skin was a perfectly healthy shade of pink. Bone structure of the face was different too, more natural looking. I wasn't a male model or anything but I was better. The good thing was that I was still recognizable.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/8.

It was going to be kind of hard to play off the sudden improvement on my looks. Well, actually, I could just say I improved my Henge which...I mean, from a certain point of view, it's true. I'm improving the stat bonus.

Still, I'm glad the mesh shirt I bought fits well. Can't see it beneath the jumpsuit, but that's an extra 10% DR. All damage I take is reduced by a total of 15% now. Not a lot, but that number is going to climb.

I had a Charisma of 6. Isn't it just wonderful what some equipment can do to patch up your weaknesses? I never really did that when playing games in my old world, I just didn't see the point. But here? Yeah, there's a point.

Though with my blue sandals, I was definitely too blue. Though I was going to fix that when I got my armor. Alright, now what can I put this increased Charisma to use for?

Oh, I know.

I left my apartment with a skip in my step.

Ichiraku Ramen was a place I dined in occasionally. Naruto brought me there to meet the only two people aside from me and occasionally the Hokage who didn't actually ignore him. My target today was the girl, Ayame.

Not like that...well, mostly not like that.

Ayame was whip-smart and from what I've seen of her, good at reading people. She was also really, really attractive. So it was really a fifty-fifty thing. I needed some help understanding something and I was hoping she'd help me out.

I caught sight of Ichiraku Ramen and stepped in under the flaps. Sure, I was technically only twelve but that...wasn't nearly as important in the Elemental Nations as it was in my old world. See, when you have twelve year old weapons of mass destruction that can lead armies and become trillionaires through S-rank missions, things like 'maturity' stop mattering as much to a person's lizard brain. Emotional stability was right out; this was Naruto. If you had the power, you got the babes and in vast quantities.

But I think I've been spared the fan-club treatment thanks to my dumped Charisma. Something downright unnerving about my clay skin and unblinking eyes.

The place, thankfully, was empty, so I'd be able to get some privacy. Up at the counter was Ayame, letting her beautiful face serve as the front while Ichiraku-san made the ramen in the back. "Hey, Ayame-chan."

"Hi there, welcome to Ichiraku Ramen," Ayame began, before doing a double-take. "Wait, I'm sorry, have you come in before?"

"It's Daisuke," I replied, taking a seat with a smile.

Ayame blinked, staring at me for several seconds, causing me to wonder if maybe two points of extra charisma was too much at once. "Oh, yes, Daisuke! Naruto's friend. I'm very sorry, you look very different."

"I hope so," I replied with a grin. "I, uh...well, I increased the strength of my henge."

"Ah, that would explain it." Ayame nodded, her eyes getting tinged with something odd.

Charisma Check Success: 6/6.

Sadness.

Sadness! Yes, I read her! Hallelujah! Stat enhancing gear works!

And it was sadness on my behalf! That's even crazier!

"I'm pretty happy with it, personally," I said with a grin. "Hopefully this will make my life a lot easier."

"Well, as long as you're happy with it," Ayame replied with a smile. "Now, what can I get you?"

"Get me a Shrimp," I said, taking some money out of my storage scroll to pay for the meal.

"One bowl coming up," Ayame said happily. She took the money and passed me a bowl. I split the chopsticks and took one, giant, appreciative slurp.

I'm not that big a fan of ramen, but Ichiraku's was perfection. "Thank you, it's delicious!"

"You're welcome," Ayame replied with a smile. "So how's being a Genin?"

"It's about what I expected," I replied, looking up to maintain eye contact. "Just doing yard work and chores on behalf of Konoha to build up discipline and get used to the mission system. Nothing too fancy."

I even remembered to switch which eye I was looking into every couple of seconds.

This is awesome!

"Oh yeah?" Ayame asked, actually looking right back into my eyes. "I hear a lot of new Genin who come in here and they sound really disappointed."

"I think a lot of them were expecting to dive into the covert operations right away," I answered with a shrug. "You know, assassinate foreign Daimyo's, stealing scrolls of forbidden Jutsu from the other villages, that stuff?"

Ayame nodded. "I think it's the instructors fault. They just go on and on about how important Shinobi are to defending the Land of Fire and tell stories about missions they had to perform and it just gets their hopes up."

"They've got to be doing it on purpose," I replied.

"I know." Ayame shook her head in exasperation and then coming right back to that eye contact I was trying so hard to maintain. "Imagine my surprise when my old classmates came into the ramen stand and told me that their first mission was to hunt down a lost cat."

"The Daimyo's wife?" I asked with a grin.

"Yes!" She snapped. "I remember Hiroyasu was so mad because it scratched his face up really bad."

"That cat just hates being touched," I said with a smirk. Thankfully, I knew to pick it up by the scruff of its neck; induced paralysis in felines, so no scratches. "So what was that about your old classmates?"

"Oh," She immediately stopped, rubbing the back of her neck. "I had to drop out of the Academy to help with the stand."

"Really? I almost dropped out myself a couple of times," I replied truthfully. Those failed checks had a way of really grating on your nerves. "What happened?"

"Well," Ayame started, looking down. Then she looked back up to me and I resumed eye-contact. "My Mom passed. Illness. Doctors said they couldn't do anything, so when she didn't get better, Dad needed help."

"I'm so sorry," I said, as sympathetically as I could. "Losing someone like that has got to be hard."

"It was," Ayame said quietly. "My Dad and I are really close now, but I still miss her."

I nodded. This conversation was making me wonder how my family took my own death so long ago. Mom must've been heartbroken. "Tell me about her."

She got this fond, nostalgic smile on her face.

"Mom taught me how to cook while I was growing up," Ayame began. "She fell for Dad when he shared with her his secret recipe and they just hit it off from there. I remember she'd let me help stretch out the dough to make noodles and would let me stir the pot while I sat on her lap."

"That sounds awesome," I said with a smile of my own. "Must've been hard to stop you from burning yourself."

"I only burnt myself once," She said, her smile getting wider. "Mom and Dad would always tell me, 'don't touch the stove', 'the fires burning, don't touch it'...and then I touched it."

I just smirked.

"But I learned my lesson," Ayame finished with a nostalgic sigh. "Don't touch a hot stove."

"That's what ladles are for," I replied quickly.

"I know, right?" Ayame said, her smile turning enthusiastic.

I took another slurp of noodles and she broke eye contact to stir the pots she was nursing on the burners beneath the counter.

Ayame's awesome. I mean, really. What a girl! Such a shame about her Mom. Wait, I came here for a reason...oh, right.

"Ayame, can I get your advice on something?" I asked.

"Sure!" Ayame said, flashing me a bright smile. "What did you need?"

"A few weeks ago," I began, not actually sure how long ago it was but it was before I got assigned to a team. But that didn't matter. "Naruto came up to me and complained about how he couldn't get a hang of his Chakra control. We'd gone over it before, and I reminded him that I'd given him several exercises which would improve his control. He told me that I was no help and left."

"Okay," Ayame slowly nodded. "So you want me to help you understand what's going on with Naruto?"

"Yes," I said with a nod.

Ayame turned a burner off. "The first thing you need to understand is that Naruto does not want help. Your help, in particular."

I blinked and frowned. "I hope you're going to explain."

"I am," Ayame replied. "Naruto's biggest dream is to become Hokage. That way people will respect him and look up to him. In order to become Hokage, you need to be the strongest Ninja in the village."

I made a finger-tent and leaned forward as I processed her explanation.

"In his eyes, his biggest competition for the role of Hokage," Ayame began, pointing at me. "Is you."

"But I don't want the hat," I protested.

"Alright." Ayame nodded. "But does Naruto know that?"

"I've told him a couple times," I said. Whenever he brought up his dream of being Hokage, I told him to go for it because I sure as heck didn't want the position.

"That helps," Ayame said. "But I don't think it matters. See, you graduated three years early, acing the exam. Naruto tells me that you do everything you try perfectly the first time. He even tells me you cracked the tree-walking technique on your own. That's incredible."

"Thank you," I replied with a smirk. "But it's why Naruto sees me as competition?"

"Maybe not competition," Ayame amended, putting a finger to her lip in an oddly cute way. "More like a goal. A mountain to climb over and surpass. Does that make sense?"

"Well, this mountain wants to help him get his goal," I replied with a shrug.

"And that's really cool of you," Ayame said. "But the thing is, you suggested training. Naruto doesn't think training works."

"He doesn't," I said with a frown. "Why is that?"

"Because he never really saw you train," Ayame pointed out. "He said that the only thing you'd ever do when you got home from the Academy was curl up with a book."

...oh crap.

"Is that true?" Ayame asked.

"It's true," I answered. "I never really needed to train, I just understand things and can put them into practice."

"Well, he thinks that if you don't have to train, he doesn't have to train," Ayame explained. "And you telling him he needs to train rubs him the wrong way. He thinks you have some super special secret that lets you just get it right away."

"I mean, I do," I said with a shrug. "It's my Kekkei Genkai. But Naruto doesn't have my Kekkei Genkai."

Well, I can't just go saying I'm a video game character, the people in the Elemental Nations don't even have a context for what that is. But me having a Kekkei Genkai has to be on record now.

"Then you need to tell him that as soon as you can," Ayame said. "Because aside from being unable to cast the Duplication Jutsu, he passes all the other parts of his test."

...him becoming a Genin while thinking he doesn't need to train would be a really bad thing. Impossibly bad. Isn't Naruto supposed to be the Champion of Hard Work? I mean, he does have the Kyuubi inside him to provide him with endless endurance, great genetics by being the Son of the Fourth Hokage and...probably some other stuff that I don't know yet.

Okay, all of his talk in canon about hard work was nonsense, but at least his heart was in the right place. Unlike here, where he had me to show just how unnecessary hard work was if you've got the right tools in your corner.

"Yeah, I'll take care of that next time I see him," I said with a nod. "I haven't seen him since that talk, though."

"He comes here pretty often." Ayame looked around and, unfortunately, an orange-jump suited blonde did not magically appear like he was summoned. "Usually after the Academy lets out for the day."

"Oh, I'm late," I replied.

"He'll be here tomorrow," Ayame replied with a nod.

I finished my bowl in a single, large slurp. "Thanks, Ayame-san. You've been a big help."

"You're welcome," Ayame said with a smile. "Any time."

I stood up to leave.

"And Daisuke?" Ayame said. Turned and she had an odd smile. "Thank you. Not many people really ask about me."

"Well, they're missing out."

Charisma Check Success: 6/6.

She's been wanting to get that stuff about her mother off her chest for a while.
* * *​

"Daisuke?" Hisako asked, rubbing her eyes. "Is that you?"

We had met in front of Training Ground 3, the sun having barely finished rising up over the horizon. It was early and I found the cool breeze of the forest really extremely refreshing. Hisako, to her credit, didn't even look tired.

"Yeah," I said with a nod, glad my teammate at least recognized me on sight. "I increased the strength of my henge."

"Your henge?" Hisako got confused for a second. Then her face lit up in understanding. "Oh, right. I forgot you wore that thing."

"That's a good thing. Still," I began, giving her a thumbs up. "You like it?"

"I do," Hisako replied with a smile. "You look good. Really blue, though."

Before I could answer, she got this odd startled expression on her face. "The blue's good, though! It looks good. I like it."

Charisma Check Failure: 6/7.

That's really annoying.

"I do too," I replied, trying to keep the irritation at my failed check from seeping into my voice. "But it is way too blue. I'm thinking of getting more stuff to add onto it just to break it up."

"You don't have too," Hisako said hurriedly. "I was just saying, it's a lot of blue. But it looks really good."

"And I was just saying, I need to break it up," I said with a frown, looking at the sandals which were a brighter shade of blue and clashed horribly with my outfit. "It doesn't look the way I want it to."

"Well okay," Hisako was nodding rapidly. "As long as you want to, that's good."

"Wait, Daisuke?" That was Nichiren showing up, just a minute late. He, on the other hand, looked tired, with light bags under his eyes. "That is you, wow! You look different."

"He increased the strength of his henge," Hisako immediately said.

"Increased the strength of what?" Nichiren asked. A yawn overcame him and he raised the back of his hand to cover his mouth.

"My henge," I replied with a frown. "I wear a henge to cover up looking like a statue."

"Wait, really?" Nichiren asked. "I had no idea. I mean, wait...yeah I did. But I forgot."

"I consider that a good thing," I said, deadpan. "How long do you think Kakashi-sensei is going to be late by this time?"

"That's very disrespectful, Daisuke," Hisako said, folding her arms.

"Yeah. But seriously, how long?"

"We've got two hours at least."

"Money's on five," Nichiren countered, yawning again. "He seemed kind of depressed before he took off."

"How can you tell?" I asked with bewilderment.

"You can see it in his eye," Nichiren replied. "It seemed kind of glazed over and it was half closed, looking down. That means he'll be a while."

"Do we even know why he's late all the time?" Hisako asked. "I don't care how much he insists, getting lost on the road of life does not mean being five hours late to a meeting. We've got things to do!"

He went to the memorial stone all the time and was late because of it. The death of his team really hit him hard. I wonder if there was a way to undo that, actually. I mean, chakra can pretty much do anything and I remember people being pissed because the end of a Shippuden arc involved a mass resurrection.

I had no details though, I was watching it from the outside as someone who couldn't get into Shippuden. I only watched the first season of the English dub. Thankfully, I kept my English skills sharp by writing all of my notes down in my old, forgotten language.

Also made decrypting my notes a nightmare for anyone who manages to get a hold of them.

Hisako groaned in irritation. "Do either of you have a way to pass the time?"

"You bring any poetry?" I asked. I had been curious ever since Kakashi-sensei had squeezed that little secret out of her.

Hisako immediately went pink. "What? No, no, no. Nope, uh-uh. It's not even that good, why would I bring any?"

"I just curious," I replied with a shrug. "I never got into poetry myself, so I was wondering if you'd share."

"Nope," Hisako shook her head. "Sorry, not sharing. It's just something dumb I do while I'm waiting at home. I'm not even all that passionate about it."

She really is down on her poetry. "Well, I'd still like to hear you read it."

"Never."

I blinked. "Okay."

As confusing as it was, I understood. You write something or you work on something for a long time, put your heart and soul into something and then you deliver it to something, someone that you care about and the idea that they hate it? It's easier to give it to the ghosts on the internet that know nothing about you and will never know. Then it's just message in a bottle drifting in an ocean of messages in bottles.

"What kind of poetry do you write?" Nichiren asked.

"Listen, Nichiren," Hisako began with a glare. "My poems are not that good. Stop asking for them!"

"Oh, haiku," I identified with a nod.

"That was on the spot too," Nichiren said with a happy smile. "Impressive!"

"It's not a Haiku!" Hisako snapped.

"The morae was on point, though," Nichiren responded with a frown.

"Getting Nichiren to stop and your claim of your poems lack of quality make up the Kiru," I added, thinking more on it. "Only thing missing is the Kigo."

She glared at both of us sputtering to get more words out, only to sit down and bring her knees up to her chest with a loud, embarrassed groan.

Nichiren and I kind of just kept going; teasing her was turning out to be kind of fun.

"Well, actually, getting to stop asking for her poems is like trying to – I don't know," Nichiren gave up with a shrug. "I forgot where I was going with that."

I was hopeless there too.

Charisma Check Failure: 6/7.

Shut up, game.

Hisako groaned and hid her face in her knees. Then she looked up. "You don't need a Kigo to make a Haiku anymore."

"Oh, so it was a Haiku," I replied with a nod.

Hisako took a breath. "Yes, you were correct. My poetry is private, so please just stop it."

Now she has to be doing it on purpose. But I can take a hint, even if it annoys me.

"Hey, another one!" Nichiren said with a grin.

Hisako face-palmed.

"Sorry," Nichiren said sheepishly.

After that, we kind of just fell into silence. Nichiren and I were smart, bringing books to read. Nichiren brought a battlefield tactics manual, which his eyes were glued too. I brought a cookbook. Because if I had to eat to restore my HP, I was going to make something delicious to take away from the pain of being injured.

I think dango were going to be my favorite dessert; they reminded me of doughnut holes. On a stick!



On a steek.

I chuckled at my little private reference. That jalapeno was funny.

As the sun rose higher and higher into the sky, Kakashi still had not shown. I had just gotten through this incredible recipe for Duck. I haven't actually had duck yet, most of my bird experience was with Chicken. The fried kind. From Kentucky.

I understand it's good though!

Eventually, though, my food-related musings came to an end as Kakashi finally showed up.

"Sorry I'm late, my cute little Genin," Kakashi said, pointing to the road behind him. "Someone turned the map in my apartment upside down so I was walking the wrong way for most of the morning."

"Was most of that time spent finding the guy who broke into your apartment?" I asked, standing up and putting my cookbook into the storage scrolls.

"Sensei, we know you're always going to be late," Hisako grumbled. "It's okay, just please just stop trying to give us dumb excuses."

"But I'm-" Kakashi's eye turned very sharp, looking me up and down as I walked up. "Daisuke? You look different."

"Yeah, I increased the power of my henge," I said automatically.

"You mean you put together a more natural disguise," Kakashi replied.

"Yeah, that's what I meant," I said with a nod.

"Well, it looks good," He said with an eye-smile. "Now, I've got a mission for us today. Another D-rank, but this time, we're cleaning a house."

"Oh, I thought we had already covered all the household chores with our D-ranks," Hisako said with a frown. "Guess I forgot one."

"Who are we cleaning it for?" Nichiren asked.

"That's a great question, Nichiren-kun," Kakashi eye-smiled. "There's a wealthy business man who lived in Konoha, he's moved out and is selling his mansion. But before he starts showing it to potential buyers, he wants it cleaned spotlessly."

"A mansion," I asked with a small, wistful smile. "I wonder if I could buy it…"

"I mean, you could," Kakashi began with an eye-smile, rubbing the top of my head. "We've done enough D-ranks by now, right?"

Not even close. "Right, it was a dumb question. So are we following you?"

"Yes you are," Kakashi said. "We might be there a while, though, so I hope you brought lunch. It's a big house."

"I brought snacks," Nichiren said, unzipping his fanny-pack and withdrawing a large pack of protein bars. "We'll be fine."

"Nice," Hisako said, standing up. "Let's get this done quick."

"Another day, another mission," I said with a smile.

Quest Added: Nevermore.

Follow Kakashi to the house.

...wait.

That's not a procedurally generated, random D-rank quest.

That is an actual quest. A quest with a story, characters and more importantly, enemies. As in, this D-rank which we have right here is going to be our first actual combat encounter. At least it's going to be really, really likely.

And that title is really ominous.

I thought this was supposed to be Naruto; things aren't supposed to go off the rails until C-rank missions, not D! This is madness! This is insanity! Hisako and Nichiren aren't ready for a real fight and in Konoha's own walls?

"Daisuke are you okay?" Kakashi asked, his eye growing narrow.

"Uh…" I froze. How exactly do I explain that I just got a quest update that told me that this mission is going to be much harder than advertised. "I've...just got a really bad feeling about this mission."

Speech Check Failure: 34/45.

Ah crap.

Kakashi actually looked kind of perturbed. "It's just a house. Are you afraid of abandoned mansions or something?"

"No," I said with a frown. "Just...I don't know, just forget it."

Kakashi glared down at me for half a second, then shrugged. "Alright. Just follow me."

Hisako looked at me oddly and muttered. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I think we'll be fine," I said, trying to force a smile. "Just a flash of nerves is all."

Charisma Check Success: 6/6.

"Well, don't worry," Hisako said kindly. "We'll be there the whole time. Promise."

"Yeah," Nichiren nodded quickly. "Besides, we've got Copy-Wheel Kakashi with us and we're in the middle of Konoha."

He's right, it can't be that bad.

"What could possibly go wrong?"

NICHIREN YOU FOOL!
* * *
Name: Shimoda Daisuke

HP: 225
Chakra: 85.

Strength: 4.
Perception: 5.
Endurance: 5.
Charisma: 6(+5).
Intelligence: 10.
Agility: 5.
Luck: 10.

Taijutsu: 80
Melee Weapons:
15
Ranged Weapons: 29
Genjutsu: 29
Ninjutsu: 29
Speech: 34 (+10)
Pick Lock: 17
Fuinjutsu: 30
Medicine: 27
Survival: 33
Chakra Control: 92.

Perks:
Taijutsu Enthusiast.
Comprehension.
Educated.​

* * *​

Author's Note: Chapter 4. I'm noticing that this is way more compressed than the first draft. I like it, less meandering around and I can just get into the nitty-gritty. I hope you all don't mind the brief detour I took with Ayame's mother, I wanted to show off how Daisuke's increased Charisma benefited him and help explain just how contrived the first drafts set-up with the Charisma was.

Another thing I noted was I was able to show off more of Hisako's added depth. In the first draft, I didn't even mention Hisako's love of poetry until the second act, here its a part of her character from the get-go. I hope that's not intrusive, I just think it adds a nice touch to have the Sasuke of the group to have such a lyrical hobby, while also letting it be subtle enough to actually fit such an archetype.

Shout out goes out too Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Ventari, PbookR, Seij, ChristobalAlvarez, Apperatus, EPiCJB19, Seeking Raven, Handwran, Russel Beatrous and Richard Whereat. Your unwavering support makes this possible.

Until the next time!

~Fulcon

 
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Chapter 5: Nevermore - Room Full of Crazy
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *​

The house blended in so well with Konoha's architecture that I never would've guessed it was a mansion. It had more in common with an apartment building, and maybe that's what it was at one point before getting bought and remodeled.

"I'm just saying," Nichiren-baka began, sounding pretty annoyed. "That's a stupid superstition and you all know it."

I know that you said the cursed phrase and this is a video game.

Well, I'm a video game. The rest of you are manga characters, which isn't any better.

"Normally I'd agree with you, Nichiren," Kakashi replied neutrally. "But I've seen, first hand, that superstition play out."

"Well, I haven't," Nichiren said crossly. "Well, except when I'm Mission Mastering for my friends."

"Mission what?" Hisako asked with a chuckle.

"It's a Shinobi and Shuriken thing," Nichiren answered enthusiastically. "I usually Mission Master and when they say something like that I try to punish them that session for it."

"Why?" I asked.

"Because it's a game and I enjoy making my players suffer."

"Is that why you have no friends?" I asked with a glare.

"Daisuke!" Hisako clapped me on the arm with the back of her fingers.

See, I prefer to PC in campaigns, and every single time I had a disagreement or bad time with the game, it was with the Dungeon Master. Because they seem to think my characters should be responsible for the apocolypse.

Nichiren glared. "Hey, I have friends! Lots of friends! Just none of them are Ninja."

Okay that was a little harsh. Sure, he probably doomed this mission and all our lives by invoking the raw, unfiltered power of Murphy who is cackling down at us and rubbing his hands together in anticipation, but I didn't need to exacerbate the issue.

I'll apologize once we make it out alive.

"Daisuke," Kakashi said with annoyance. "You need to watch your tongue. Especially on missions. If the team isn't working together because of unnecessary drama, it could cost lives."

I know that, you- "Yes, Sensei."

"Now apologize."

"Sorry, Nichiren."

Charisma Check Success: 6/4.

"Good," Kakashi nodded, sounding satisfied. He knocked on the mansion door and it was quickly opened.

At the door stood an older gentleman. His hair was done up in a top-knot and he wore a formal kimono. He was clean shaven. Beneath the kimono he was a really skinny man, but that didn't mean anything.

Basically, he was the picture of a stereotypical Land of Fire butler. Which is probably what he was.

"Ah, Hatake-san," the man said with a bow. "A pleasure to meet you."

We all bowed back.

"That's right," Kakashi replied. "You must be Nagahama-san."

"And this must be your Genin team," He said, looking at all of us with a smile. "Come in, come in."

The mansion was empty. We came to a massive great-room and there was nothing. No furniture, not even a chair. The carpet was a light gray, making the whole house seem like it was made of concrete. No, wait. Not completely empty, there were cleaning supplies piled up in that corner there.

"The house itself is mostly clean," The butler said. "The only things left are the windows and the master bedroom. The basement has some rats that need to be cleared out."

He handed Kakashi the key. "Once you're done, please leave and lock up. We have a team of Realtor's ready to sell the mansion back to Konoha in a few weeks."

"Why in a few weeks?" I immediately asked.

"I do not know," Nagahama replied. "He was also emphatic that I must not return once the mansion was clean. The master of the house was always very eccentric. I would finish the cleaning myself, but I must report to my new position in two hours."

Oh, scheduling conflict. Perfectly explains why he had to hire us.

I'm even more suspicious now.

"Do you know where he is living now?" Kakashi asked.

"He neglected to say." He turned to the door. "Please do not stay overlong. This house has always made me quite nervous and I am glad to be leaving it. Thank you for taking this mission."

Oh no.

"You're welcome," Kakashi said.

We bid the butler farewell and he left immediately without another word. Immediately, I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up straight.

I'm going with my gut here and saying that something is wrong.

Quest Updated: Nevermore.

Completed: Follow Kakashi to the House.

Clear the basement of rats.


"Alright," Kakashi began, rubbing his hands together. "Nichiren and Hisako, you both go up to the master bedroom and clean it up. I'll wash the windows. Daisuke, take care of the rats in the basement."

Thank you, 10 Luck.

"Wait, do we have to clean the bathroom?" Hisako immediately asked.

"Yup!" Kakashi eye-smiled. "The sooner you get it done, the sooner you don't have to smell whatever atrocities have been left up there."

"Aw man," Nichiren replied, following Hisako with his shoulders slumped over to the cleaning supplies.

I looked around. "Where is the basement?"

Kakashi stopped. "Huh, that would've been good to ask him."

"He seemed like he was in a hurry," I said with a frown. "I blame the jinx."

"Daisuke," Kakashi rubbed his sole eye.

"I'm serious!" I said throwing my hands up in wild gestures. "There is something wrong with this house. Even the butler said so!"

And butlers are usually closet murderers, if you believe the movies.

"Look, Daisuke," Kakashi said, putting his hand on my shoulder. "I promise I won't let anything happen to you. I can keep an eye on all three of you from here. The second anything happens, I'll be there. Okay?"

I took a breath. Kakashi was an awesome Sensei, even if all the training he had me do was ultimately useless. "Yes, Sensei."

"Good," Kakashi said with a smile.

"I guess I'll go find the basement, then," I said, walking toward a small hallway that went off into a shadow. Hisako and Nichiren were walking up the stairs.

"I think the master bedroom is the one with these massive double doors," Hisako said. I heard the click of a doorknob as she pushed the door open. "Yeah, here it is."

Nice.

The doorway to the basement didn't have a door, just a set of empty hinges and a long stairway to the concrete.

Huh, the basement wasn't finished. Well, okay then. You'd think a super wealthy individual would do that. Guess not, this time.

I slowly walked down the stairs, trying to avoid making sounds with my steps. My boots rested on the concrete when I came to the bottom and I looked around. The window wells let sunlight in through the windows.

My lips were pressed into a thin and anxious line as I looked both ways, trying to find the basement monster that surely lived here. To make it less nerve wracking that I went into the basement of a clearly haunted house, I flipped the light switch.

To my surprise, the lights worked, casting a yellow glow onto the empty room.

With that, I got to work.

The rats were all hidden in little tunnels they made in the insulation. To my dismay, killing them offered no EXP, of which I felt fairly starved. Sure, I was only a few weeks into my service as a Genin but I shouldn't still only be level 6.

Quest Updated: Nevermore.

Completed: Clear the basement of rats.

Reunite with your team.


It was at that very second that I heard a shrill, ear-piercing scream come from upstairs and I bolted. Hisako had apparently found something and if she dies, I'm never forgiving myself!

Hurriedly, I got to the top and wrapped around to the second stair case, going up three floors until I came to the massive double doors that lead to the master bedroom. Turning right through the last set of doors and I came to the bathroom, with a large stepladder having folded out from the ceiling that was way to high for a non-Ninja to get to.

I'm sensing that this was a monster in the attic, not a basement monster.

My final ascent and I joined my team in the attic. There was Hisako, Nichiren and Kakashi-sensei, all standing ahead of me and in the attic.

...oh boy.

Hanging from the rafters were bodies. Human bodies. Three of them on the left, two on the right. Hung from the rafters, they were naked and disemboweled, with blood having dripped and dried on the attic floor. The smell of death, a rancid and stomach churning miasma hung in the air and I had to suppress the urge to vomit.

On the support beams for the roof and on the floor, there was writing. The ravings of a madman, begging for forgiveness, saying that he had done grievous wrong...I had seen a couple of room full of crazies on TV, but experiencing them was something else.

I almost threw up.

Almost.

"What happened?" I asked once I swallowed my vomit, leaving a burning feeling in my throat.

"I smelled something disgusting in the bathroom," Nichiren, who did vomit, turned to tell us. "But it wasn't coming from the toilet and we couldn't get rid of it no matter how hard we scrubbed, so Hisako decided to look up here."

"This merchant guy is obviously an insane murderer," Hisako said with a gasp, she having been holding her breath.

Don't blame her, the smell is death.

Kakashi turned to me, not even phased by this display of death. "Daisuke, did you know something about this?"

"No, I didn't know anything," I replied, shaking my head rapidly. "This is all news to me."

Charisma Check Success: 6/3.

Kakashi closed his eye, and opened it again. "Okay, but what did you know?"

I make a questioning noise.

"After I told you about this mission, you went pale as a ghost," Kakashi explained. "So you might not have known about this, you did know something."

Hisako and Nichiren were both looking at me without saying anything.

...well...I mean, it had to come out sooner or later. I guess. Maybe I can just tell them some chunks.

"I didn't want to say anything because I wasn't sure you'd believe me," I began, shuffling uncomfortably where I stood. "Because it's weird."

"Well, let's get out of this attic to someplace we can talk," Kakashi started, looking back at the insanity Hisako found in the attic. "Daisuke, I can promise you, I won't let anything happen to you."

See, I believe you, but the Hokage's word is law and he might be more than a little freaked out by my quest notifications.

It was at that second, the stepladder that lead up to the attic snapped shut and then I heard movement. From down below. Not a little movement, not a medium amount of movement, but a lot of movement. As if the world itself shifted beneath the attic we were standing in.

"Sensei?" Hisako asked quietly.

Kakashi-sensei walked over to the door and stomped on it. It fell open and his eye started to bug out of it's socket.

I ran over and saw...oh.

That's not good.

Instead of a bathroom, it was a hallway. A concrete hallway with a blood trail across the floor, as if someone was being dragged across the floor.

Well, I'm annoyed. I thought I signed up to play Fallout, not Amnesia.

And I'm beyond terrified, but that goes without saying.

Kakashi pulled his Hitai-ate up, revealing his crimson Sharingan. He looked into my eyes, and crouched down. "Okay, change of plans. Daisuke, tell me everything you know."

"I don't know anything, that's the truth," I replied rapidly. "I only knew this mission was going to be really hard."

"Okay," Kakashi nodded. "How?"

"When I get missions, I get a text notification," I was full-on explaining at full speed and there was nothing I could do to stop it. "The mission gets a name and I get a to-do list on how to complete the mission."

Kakashi didn't say anything.

"So what made this mission different?" Nichiren asked quietly.

"Usually, the missions are labeled D-Rank: Weeding at Yoshimitsu's or something," I said. "You know, very bland names that don't say anything."

"But this one was different?" Kakashi asked, turning my head to look into my eye with the Sharingan again.

"Yeah," I nodded.

"What was it called?"

"Nevermore," I said, then froze.

I just used it's English name. Why do I even get quests in English? What's a good translation? Crap, crap, crap, craaaaaaaap…

Kakashi repeated the title, sounding confused with that thick accent I knew he'd have if he ever tried to pronounce an English word. "Is that some kind of code?"

"Yes!" I said with relief. "It's code. The code I get all my notifications in."

Because when you think about it, all language is code.

Charisma Check Success: 6/6.

Speech Check Failure: 34/40.

Oh come on, game.

"And what is it code for?" Kakashi asked, his eye narrowing.

I provided him with the direct translation for the expression 'never again'. Less poetic, but clarity was more important than panache. "I don't know why it's named the way it is."

"It's probably just a mission naming convention," Kakashi explained. "Broken Steel, Point Lookout, Wolf Queen? All names for actual missions and combat actions I've been on."

Wait, shoot. He's just providing me with a perfect explanation for everything. Thank you, Luck Stat!

"So what does your to-do list tell you to do right now?" Kakashi asked.

"It told me to reunite with my team," I told him with absolute honesty. "It hasn't updated yet."

"Why not?"

"Because we haven't finished with this conversation yet," I replied immediately. "It's finnicky like that."

Kakashi's single eye blinked. "Alright. Is there anything else about this mission we need to know?"

"Aside from the title, this mission is just as much a mystery to me as it is to you," I told. "That is the honest truth. I've got no idea what's waiting for us."

Kakashi sighed, then stood up. "Listen up. Normally, a team has to wait to leave the village for a mission to go completely sideways like this. I guess we're unlucky."

I was not going to point out that Nichiren jinxed us again; it wouldn't help.

But I wanted to.

"Just keep calm, follow orders and don't try to be a hero," Kakashi directed with the decisiveness of a veteran. "Once we leave the house, the ANBU is going to go over the whole place with toothbrush's to figure out how this place wound up in the middle of Konoha the way it is."

Ooh, making our escape seem guaranteed from the outset. He is good!

"We will make it out," Kakashi said. "I swore I wouldn't let anything happen to you, and I will keep that promise. Do you understand?"

"Yes, sensei!" We all chorused.

"Good," Kakashi said. He pointed down at the far wall. "Now, I need you to stand back, I'm going to try to break through there."

Smart. Just sequence break our way out of the level entirely and skip the quest inspired by Dunwich. Seriously, the theme of those places are great, but it is not 'first quest of the game' great. And they're only great when you're on the other side of the screen!

We all moved out of the way. Sensei flew through handseals so fast I couldn't even see them.

Perception Check Failure: 5/9.

Yes, game. I just covered that.

After Kakashi was done, he was holding a literal fist-full of lightning. Then he lowered it to the floor and charged forward.

"Chidori!"

Fun fact, the reason you shout the name of the technique you're doing is so your allies know what you're doing and if they need to get out of the way, in addition to it's help as a focus. According to the books, the fact that your enemies know what you're doing is an acceptable trade-off.

I hard disagree, but I can't deny that it looks cool.

He ran forward so fast that I could've blinked and missed him, thrusting the jutsu right into the wall.

Sadly, and I should've guessed this would've happened, the Chidori did not break through the wall. When the jutsu made impact, the entire attic lit up as previously unseen seals made themselves known by illuminating us with crimson light.

Kakashi looked around the attic and sighed. "Of course, that would be too easy."

"That should've worked," Hisako said, looking up at the seals as their light slowly dissipated. "I've read about that Jutsu. It cut a lightning bolt! It should've worked. Why didn't it work?"

"Kai!" Kakashi snapped harshly, cutting off Hisako's complaining, his fingers in a hand sign.

Nothing about our environment changed.

"We go the long way, then," Kakashi said. pointing toward the trap door. "Follow me."

Quest Updated: Nevermore.

Completed: Reunite with your team.

Find a way out of the house.


"Hold up, just got an update," I chimed with a raised finger.

"What does it say?" Kakashi asked.

"It's telling me to find a way out of the house," I replied with a nod.

"That's not helpful," Hisako remarked, completely deadpan.

"It's really not," I agreed with a nod.

"Does it tell you how to find a way out of the house?" Nichiren asked curiously, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose.

"No." I shook my head.

"That's annoying," Nichiren said, looking over his head at the bodies. "Can we...leave the attic, please?"

"Let's go, everyone," Kakashi said, gesturing for us to follow him.

We dropped down into the hallway. Ahead of us was a door, made out of steel. Behind us was a wall, nothing there.

Kakashi took a spot next to the door and at Sensei's hand-sign, we lined up on the opposite wall. Before Kakashi could do anything, we heard a loud snap.

I turned my head just in time to see that the attic stairs had retracted into the ceiling and the door to the attic was swiftly covered by concrete that flowed like it was alive.

Okay then.

Hisako gulped. Nichiren huddled in on himself, trying to make himself small. I don't know what my nervous reaction was, but something inside me had gone very cold.

Kakashi snapped with his fingers, signed for us to keep focused on him and the mission.

Take a breath.

Everything is going to be okay.

I'm being escorted by one of the highest level npc's in the setting.

I mean, he's a person, not an NPC but...he's high level and can protect us. We'll be fine. Right?

Kakashi opened the door slowly and my ears were graced by the grating, piercing sound of steel grinding on steel. At that moment, Sensei threw the door open and jumped in with a kunai drawn. After an eternity of holding my breath…

"It's clear."

We walked in through the door, shutting it behind us. I saw that we had entered some kind of prison block, with cells of iron bars on both sides. At the end was another door.

"They used to keep people in here?" Hisako asked, sounding shaken.

"Looks like it." I don't know if it's better or worse that there's no skeletons in the cells. Better in that it means no one literally starved to death in here. Worse because...that means something happened to them.

Judging from the smears of black and red, they had definitely been occupied at one point.

"The real question is why," Nichiren said, his voice shaking.

"Focus on getting out," Kakashi-sensei immediately cut in.

At that second, something lunged out from one of the cells, an arm reaching out for Hisako. She screamed...but she also buried her kunai in her attacker.

Her attacker was a...blob. A gray, cement blob that that had arms and legs in the crude fascimile of a human. The featureless head which Hisako had buried her kunai in closed around the blade, and then her hand. With another scream, Hisako yanked her hand out and backed away as the thing, walked through the bars like a monster made out of mush.

It's movements were slow and erratic, even as Kakashi surged forward to put himself between us and it. With another jutsu, he threw a lightning bolt directly at the thing's torso and it exploded into a thousand pieces.

Ten Ryo says it pulls itself together.

...no?

Alright, I owe myself ten Ryo.

I whirled around as the sound of mud sliding across metal and found myself face to face with another one of those things, reaching for me and trying to attack me.

Uh...crap…

My heart was pounding in my ears. I could feel my eyes trying to escape their sockets as this thing lunged after me.

...wait…

I ducked, then ran around the cement thing as it tried to tackle me. I tripped over my shadow and found myself inching away on my butt, trying to get away from this thing.

...what was I supposed to do?

Then Kakashi made it explode with another lightning bolt.

Okay!

Life is okay.

I'm alive.

I'm safe.

We're good.

"Daisuke, are you okay?" Hisako immediately asked, running over to me and helping me up.

"Yeah," I said with a nod. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just kind of…"

"Froze?" Hisako asked kindly.

"Yeah," I nodded again, more rapidly.

"Mom and Dad both say that happens to everyone on their first mission," Hisako said quickly. "Don't worry about it, nothing to be ashamed of."

"Uh, guys?" Nichiren cut in, pointing down the hall. "We've got company."

I looked down the hall at the cells we passed and watched as a flash mob of cement facsimiles walked out of their cells and started quickly lumbering toward us.

"Everyone through the next door," Kakashi barked, pointing at the door we had been walking towards. "Hisako, keep your kunai ready and be ready to close the door behind me."

"Yes, sensei!" Hisako said.

We ran for the door, listening as lightning cracked and snapped behind us, destroying the things as they charged in on us. Hisako pulled over the door with great protest from the rusty hinges. Nichiren and I dove through the doorway.

A second later, I heard the door slam shut and Kakashi was standing in front of us. Nichiren and I quickly stood up.

We found ourselves in some kind of...concert hall. Yeah, it was a concert hall. There was a stage with music stands left on it, some knocked over, another missing it's top. Opposite the stage were chairs and way up near the roof was a booth. What was in there?

"Well, that was interesting," Kakashi said with an eye-smile. "They were basically harmless. Too slow."

"Uh, Sensei?" Hisako said, sounding a little panicked.

I turned to the door and saw that the concrete was leaking in through the edges of the doors.

Kakashi ran forward, going through seals faster than the eye could blink-

Perception Check Failed: 5/9.

-shut up, game! And slammed his hands on the ground. Then the room lit up in scarlet seals, much like in the attic.

"That's a little annoying," Kakashi muttered to himself. Then he paused, did another jutsu and this time, he placed his hands on the door.

Perception Check failed: 5/7.

Seriously, game?

But then this time, the jutsu went through, the door electrifying. On the other side, I could've sworn I heard an explosion, maybe a chain of them. Kakashi took slow, cautious steps away from the door, to make sure the monsters from the jail cells really stopped.

They weren't trying to eke in through the door cracks.

"Okay," Kakashi let out a breath.

"How did the jutsu go through?" I asked with confusion.

"The door didn't have any seals on it," Kakashi replied with an eye-smile. "Lucky for us."

It didn't? Must've been what I missed. Made sense, though.

"I wonder why," Hisako asked curiously, looking at the steel door with her fingers on her chin.

"I don't think we should question it," Kakashi chided lightly.

"I think we should explore the room before we leave," I suggested. "You know, because we don't want to miss anything important, like a key to the front door."

"I have the key," Kakashi replied, fishing the key out of his pocket and showing me with an 'eye-smile'.

"Oh, right." I felt kind of dumb. "But there could be other doors."

"That is true," Kakashi replied.

"Like that booth up there," Hisako said, pointing upward. "Let me take a look."

She placed her foot on the wall and tried to walk up. Tried, because when she did, the wall lit up in red seals and she couldn't stick, her foot slipping as she tried to take a step. Thankfully, she caught herself before falling straight on her back. "What is going on?"

"The walls eat chakra," Nichiren pointed out blandly.

"Yes, I can see that, Nichiren!" Hisako barked back in annoyance.

"Hey, hey," Kakashi cut them off. "Take a breath. We'll make it out. At least we're not dealing with an enemy Shinobi."

Yet.

"There is a door," Kakashi said, pointing to, well, one of three doors. One leading further on directly ahead of where we came out of, another just to the right of that door, a little further in and then the third door was in the right wall. I think that's the one he was talking about.

Charisma Check Success: 6/6.

Yes!

"That one might take us to the booth," Kakashi said. "We will go as a group."

The door was mercifully silent as it opened, and the stairs it led to did bring us to the booth. Inside was equipment, the kind that you'd see in musical production booth with it's buttons and knobs….I didn't know the name, though.

But on the top of the console was a tape player; something I had forgotten existed. But then, earpieces and walkies-talkie's existed, so why not a tape player?

"Nothing," Nichiren said, shaking his head. "Well, at least we checked."

"I'm keeping the tape player," I said, pointing to it.

"Why?" Hisako asked with confusion, nervously twirling her remaining kunai by the ring.

"Because it might be useful later," I replied, trying to smile in spite of everything. "Besides, I want one."

"Daisuke, lugging around a tape player is only going to slow us down," Kakashi admonished, sounding very tired all of a sudden.

"Storage scrolls."

Kakashi froze for a second, then shrugged. "Alright, but don't take it out until we leave."

"Yes, Sensei."

I put the player in my scroll and the scroll back on my belt.

"Can we go now?" Hisako asked with a frown, looking around the studio with an anxious edge in her eyes.

"Yup!"
* * *​

Author's Note: The chapters are getting shorter and shorter as I'm finding it hard to keep up the gargantuan size of the first couple chapters. But, I am really happy with this chapter and I hope that, when you get the chance to read it, that you'll like the chapter too.

The first time around with the Monster House, I slapped Daisuke into a Genjutsu. I thought it'd be a cool mind-screw and that everyone would catch on immediately that Daisuke's mind was being messed with. Instead, it wound up being confusing and I never really talked about it again so it wasn't that important in the grand scheme of things.

This time around, I'm exploring the house as more of a living entity in its own right. It feels like the rules are established much more clearly here in this chapter; the house rearranges itself and spits out clay monsters. No Genjutsu because things like that don't really work without proper foreshadowing and I didn't feel it necessary this time.

Something new is the tape player. I wanted this thing to be a straighter, video game dungeon and in modern games, that includes 'apocalypse logs' or journals left by the people who came before. It's a pretty interesting device and with it, I'm going to be able to throw in some additional foreshadowing that I couldn't do in the first draft simply because I was trying to make my foreshadowing as subtle as possible; the problem with subtle is that most people miss it and then complain when the thing I was trying to build up slaps them in the face while they weren't paying attention. So I'm going to avoid that this time around by spoon-feeding it to you, by comparison.

...I needed to get that off my chest.

P.S: I had to delete the post when I realized that there was a formatting issue. Sorry for the inconvenience.


P.P.S: Wait, holy cow. There's a remove formatting button! I'm going to use that! Forever!

Shout out to
Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Ventari, PbookR, Seij, ChristobalAlvarez, Apperatus, EPiCJB19, Seeking Raven, Handwran, Russel Beatrous and Richard Whereat. You guys are amazing! Thank you for your continued support!

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Chapter 6: Nevermore - Audio Diaries
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *
We checked both the other doors. One was a closet with nothing in it and the last door was a staircase, going downward, the curved in a spiral. The fact that there was enough room for a large spiral stair case unnerved me. How deep does it go?

Going to be honest, if this isn't a Genjutsu, and it isn't, we've all done Kai several times now, then it means that the house itself is rearranging it's insides and everything we've seen is stuff that already existed. Existed where? Going to say down in the foundation of the house, just floating in the concrete or whatever.

Didn't the butler guy say he wasn't supposed to come back? Pretty sure that him leaving was the trigger for the house to rearrange itself. Did the butler know? I'm going to guess not. Because if he did know, he'd have to have a reason to not tell us and there's no way he knew which team was going to pick this mission. So it's not like it was a trap or something for me.

Actually, that's kind of scary to think about. If someone that wasn't our team picked this mission, they'd be walking straight into this without even the game context to prepare them.

"Hisako, take up the rear," Kakashi ordered. "Nichiren and Daisuke, form up between her and I."

We did so with an acknowledgment of his order.

Actually, the house didn't rearrange itself until after we all got in the attic. But why was that? Was it because because everyone was in the attic? But that would make more sense if it was a game trigger instead of it being something that someone deliberately made to serve a purpose in the game world.

I think.

The staircase seemed to go down forever. It reminded me of that one staircase in The Sands of Time that was stupidly long just so you could listen to the amazing guitar solo they had prepared. I remembered that level being cool once. Then on replay it was just long and boring.

Though in real life, I'll take long and boring over dangerous and terrifying any day.

You think if my teammates and I shared some banter, it would make this easier? Maybe it would. But it didn't seem like any of us had anything to say. We were keeping our corners checked and our rears covered and that absorbed all our mental capacity.

Or in my case, it overwhelmed me and I kind of checked out.

Focus, Daisuke.

Don't get taken by surprise, your teammates are counting on you.

Eventually, we came to a door. Kakashi pulled it open and looked around inside. "Clear. Everyone inside."

We did.

This was a library. A giant, circular room with shelves going all the way up. I guess I can see why the staircase was so tall, it was only as tall as the library itself. The shelves were filled with books and scrolls, enough that my eyes wanted to cry at the sheer beauty. This was a repository of knowledge. I love knowledge.

"WHOA!" Hisako shreiked, pulling me out of my observations.

I found myself looking down and caught sight of the cement monster that had decided to grace us with it's presence. It was shambling after, slowly dragging it's feet, leaving a trail of mud with each step.

Kakashi-sensei was using lightning to take these things out permanently. I should be able to manufacture a similar jutsu. Right?

You do not know that jutsu.

Oh come on, it's an emergency!

You do not know that jutsu.

Crap...would an explosive note work?

I mean, I haven't written any yet and I don't have chakra seals…

A lightning bolt shot out from Kakashi-sensei's extended fingers and it exploded into inert cement. He went through the jutsu again, and fired at a second cement beast That had emerged behind us.

We had grouped up, looking around. I noticed that Kakashi's breathing was starting to sound ragged.

Medicine Check Success: 27/25.

It was the Sharingan. He was using it to analyze our environment to figure a way out and it was starting to drain him.

There were no more cement monsters.

"That's it?" Hisako asked with a suspicious frown.

"Let's not question it," Kakashi admonished. "We need to keep moving."

"Uh, sensei?" I started. "I think maybe we should take a brief rest."

"Daisuke-kun, we don't have time for that," Kakashi replied. "We need to keep moving if we're going to get out of here."

"But you're the only one with a reliable way of taking those things out," I rebutted. "And you having the Sharingan eye out is draining you fast. We need rest or you're going to be dragging your feet by the end, and I don't want to think about what else we might have to face without you being able to fight it."

Speech Check Success: 34/30.

Kakashi took a gulp of air and sighed. "Alright. Five minutes. But then we need to move."

"Great," I said with relief. Not only would he get a chance to catch his breath, I'd be able to peruse the library for a minute. Actually, wait. I've got a better idea. "Sensei, can you try teaching us a lightning jutsu? Just so you wouldn't be the only one who can depose of those cement monsters?"

Kakashi blinked as he covered his Sharingan. "Sure. But it's going to be really simple and if you get it right in the time we have to rest, I'll treat you to lunch."

"Awesome!" Hisako said, getting on her knees in preparation to learn.

Nichiren followed suit and...then so did I.

"This is called the Lightning Kunai," Kakashi said, starting the instruction. He showed us the handsigns. Bird. Rat. Dragon. "I obtained it from a Genin from Kumo. It fires a small blast of lightning directly ahead."

He told us how to redirect the chakra to make the jutsu, and then shape it to come out of our fingers.

Chakra Control Check Success: 92/25.

Ninjutsu Check Success:29/25.

Jutsu Added: Lightning Kunai!

There's nothing like holding a fist full of lightning! You now know how to use the Lightning Kunai.

The jutsu reminded me of Star Wars. Specifically, Attack of the Clones. You know how clones blasters show little blue bolts of laser or whatever it was at its target? Yeah, that's what this is doing. Except it was a bit more bright white instead of blue, but you get the picture. It fired a blaster bolt for three hand signs.

Come to think of it, I could use this jutsu as the basis for a blaster. Wasn't there even a lightsaber in this universe? Yeah, the Sword of the Thunder God. So there's even precedent for it.

But I pulled the jutsu off the first try.

"Okay," Kakashi said with a nod that seemed like it was part surprise part satisfaction. "Daisuke earned everyone lunch. So we're going to be relying on you to help fight them off."

"Okay then," Hisako blinked and frowned, going through the hand signs. She threw her fingers forward, causing only a minor electrical spark to flash out of her fingers. With a wince of pain, she withdrew those fingers back. "Ow!"

Nichiren tried the jutsu, and wound up holding his hand with a pained look in his face. He did not, however, cry out...though I could see that he really wanted too. The tear coming out of his eye said it all.

Charisma Check Success: 6/2.

Yes, I know, game.

"That's enough," Kakashi held his hands up to stop the other two from trying again. "I don't want your hands to be put out of commission."

"It's not like we're using them for much right now, anyway," Hisako grumbled, folding her arms and glaring off to the side.

You know, speaking of hands, I'm kind of annoyed I didn't get to test Tsunade's megaton punch out. Well, I did, but I choked at my only opportunity. Something told me that once I had splattered the cement monsters all over the wall, they'd just slowly reform and start coming after me. The only reason they stayed dead after getting hit with a Lightning Jutsu was because lightning counters Earth.

Still, if we're just taking a breather, I was going to look around the library.

"Alright, I'm rested up," Kakashi said, standing and looking a little bit more rested than last time.

"But it hasn't been five minutes yet," I said, utterly baffled. I didn't even get to see if there were any cool books here yet!

"Doesn't matter," Kakashi said, noticeably leaving the Sharingan covered. "We can't sit still for very long."

Fine, he has a point.

"Hey, wait. What's that?" Nichiren said, pointing to one of the shelves.

Kakashi zipped over to where Nichiren was pointing and picked up a cassette tape.

Neat!

"Hey, we can use the tape player," I said with a grin. "Might tell us a bit more about our situation here."

Kakashi stopped, then stood up straight. "Alright, we'll sit and listen. It's important to gather information when you're on a mission, especially when you're in a foreign country or otherwise incredibly dangerous situation."

"Like when you're in a house that spits monsters out of its walls," Nichiren surmised with a slow nod.

"When we get out, the Hokage is going to level this place to the ground," Kakashi assured us.

"Which is really a shame because I'd really like to get a look at the seal work on the walls," I said, taking the tape player out and opening it.

"Some things just aren't worth the hassle, Daisuke," Kakashi replied, sliding the tape into the player. "Always try to keep things to a good risk-reward ratio. If you don't, you'll wind up with a hollow victory at best."

A Pyrrhic Victory.

Kakashi pressed play and the tape started.

The microphone being used to record the tape was obviously either low quality or damaged in some way; it had a static-sounding underlay to the audio that was audible right from the start.

"Preparations have been made." The voice on the tape was clearly male. Older. He sounded very tired and weary. "Susumu has been told to leave the house and not return. It would not do for him to get tied into this."

Who? Is that the butler?

Interesting that the butler got exonerated in the first tape we collected.

"Once he leaves, the cage will be locked," The voice said. "Never again will the Avian be allowed to roam free."

It was at this moment, is sounded like something hit the desk the microphone was sitting on, and the voice was grunting and groaning in pain.

"It knows something is wrong," The voice gasped. "This accursed bird is clawing at the walls, trying to get free...but I must not let it go. It must not get out."

This reminds me of something, but I can't quite put my finger on it.

"Shimura-san and his minions have been invaluable in creating the cage, even if they will never truly know the extent of the cage's creation." He chuckled, then laughed a little too long, causing the sound to trail off into a wheeze. "They have no idea what I've built here in the center of Konoha, and it is just as well. So long as the boy in blue never enters the attic, the secrets of this house will never see the light of day."

The boy in what now?

I literally got this jumpsuit yesterday.

My entire team turned to look at me immediately with varying expressions of alarm.

I held up my finger and pointed to the tape player, just so I could figure out what I was going to say in response to this.

"And if he does, well," He took a deep breath. "I hope he brought friends."

With that, the tape ended.

"I bought this jumpsuit yesterday," I said quickly. "And I never met whoever was speaking before in my life."

"Daisuke, calm down," Kakashi admonished, putting a hand on my shoulder. "I believe you. But that doesn't explain why you're the reason the house decided to become a labyrinth on us."

"I don't have an explanation for you," I immediately interjected.

Well, not an in game explanation and this was supposed to be a simulator. Things weren't supposed to happen simply because I exist. Like this whole thing just doesn't make any sense.

"Okay, okay," Kakashi-sensei said. "Again, I believe you. You don't have anything to worry about. We're going to get out of this and then the Hokage is going to get to the bottom of it all. Don't worry."

"You sure the Hokage's not going to lock me up in T&I?" I asked him with the deepest frown.

Kakashi blinked, and rubbed his eye. "Look, you can trust the Hokage and you can trust ANBU. Whatever insane stories you heard in the Academy about people being locked up in T&I for the most asinine of things are just that; stories. He won't lock you up in T&I. Period."

Charisma Check Success: 6/4.

I believed him, which made me feel a little better. But only a little.

"The real question is why Daisuke would be the trigger," Nichiren said, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. "If he wanted to keep all of this," he started gesturing to the room at large. "...secret, then why not disable the trigger entirely?"

"And why kill Daisuke?" Hisako asked incredulously. "Like...Daisuke? He's the nicest guy ever! What did he ever do to deserve this?"

"Well, I try," I said, going red in the face.

"They're not going to kill you," Hisako said with a viscous glare if I ever saw one. "Promise. We'll get out of this, just like Kakashi-sensei said."

"Let's move on," Kakashi ordered. "Daisuke, stow the tape and player in a storage scroll."

"Got it," I did so and we moved on.

There was another door and we went through it. Through it was a hallway, stretching out with a fork going to the left.

"We'll check the side path first," Kakashi said, slowly leading us forward. "Daisuke, take up the rear and try to take out the cement hostiles before they attack us."

"Got it."

I walked backwards part of the way, keeping an eye on our tail and looking forward only when it was time to turn. Right at that second, I saw a cement monster drip out from the ceiling with a plop before solidifying in a vaguely humanoid shape.

Lightning Kunai!

Three seals and the bolt shot forward, faster than any kunai I've ever seen before. The monster immediately recoiled as it hit the shoulder, the arm breaking off. But then it started forward again.

Lightning Kunai!

4,100 / 15,000 EXP.

On the one hand killing those things gives me EXP where's the rest of them I need to kill them all CEMENT MONSTER GENOCIDE RUN!

Ahem.

The second part...was that felt awful.

Not the committing murder part, but the fact that I had to go through three hand signs to cast a single blaster bolt. It goes fast, sure, but it's just one and with how fast Shinobi can go, a scatter-gun strat with Shuriken would be way more effective; or for Kunai, using explosive notes.

Unless your aim was just that good. And I guess mine could...but still. Three hand signs? No. I'm not using this thing in the future unless I can figure out a way to optimize it. Like create some weapon similar to the Sword of the Thunder God. Which I'll be able to do...so let's keep this in my tool belt for now.

"Good shooting, Daisuke," Kakashi said with approval.

"Thanks," I replied, walking along with them.

But I think I just hate casting jutsu in the middle of combat in general. You have to stop what you're doing, go through a bunch of hand signs and then cast some spell you think is going to turn the fight around; why go through the trouble when you can just walk up to them and hit them? I mean, sure, I'm speaking as someone who theoretically can splat someone across an entire room with one punch, so maybe I'm biased here, but...casting Jutsu in the middle of combat just doesn't feel fluid.

It goes against my style of play.

At least it does until I have Sealless Jutsu at level 40. Then I can literally do whatever I want with Chakra.

At the door, we took positions around it. I was next to the door where it opened to have a clear shot at anything we saw inside while Hisako and Nichiren were placed such that they could be covered by the door itself if anything came out.

I prepped a Lightning Kunai, feeling the electrical chakra pool together in the tips of my fingers, which I kept close like I was using a pistol.

We all nodded to each other and Kakashi threw open the door.

We came to an auditorium, seats built on a ramp going up that overlooked a large pit separated from us by a wall of completely transparent windows. On the seats were Cement monsters that I desperately needed to find a different name for.

Wally?

Because they come out of the wall?

Yeah, I'm calling them wallies. The name amuses me.

There were four wallies in the auditorium, all sitting in seats. I took a shot, then a second causing one to be blasted forward across the seats ahead of it in massive clumps of dust.

4,200 / 15,000 EXP.

I turned to try to take out more, but Kakashi-sensei had already taken them out.

Fie! Fie on you, overpowered companion! Stealing my kills!

I'm not that mad about it since there is obviously enough EXP to bring me to max level and then some but...still. It's really annoying, I haven't had the ability to really gain EXP without completing quests in a while.

"What's down there?" Nichiren asked, pointing toward the pit.

I flickered my way over there to look down. It was an operating theater, with a gurney, spotlights and lots of various tools hanging down from the ceiling. No wallies, but there was a tape down there.

"There's another tape down there," I said, pointing down.

"Okay, but how are we going to get it?" Hisako asked, cupping her hands on the glass like a pair of binoculars and looking down at them.

"Let me try something," I said, winding a punch up.

Hisako apparently figured out what I was going to do and leaped backward quickly.

I let the punch fly and...red seals lit up along the surface.

Because of course they would.

This dungeon is so railroad-y, I swear. Like, I can understand not wanting us to just break through the walls to get out, but come on, it's glass. I should be able to break out of it.

Good thing I held back on the physical power of the punch, I didn't want to lose any HP breaking my hand.

"That's so annoying," I groused.

"It was a good try," Hisako said with a nod.

Down in the pit, I saw another entrance, which I followed to find a mini-staircase going downward to a door. "Door's over there."

"I think we should let that tape go," Kakashi said. "It looks like a trap."

I almost said he had nothing to worry about, but the more I looked at it, the less it looked like an operating theater and more it looked like an arena. The kind where waves upon waves of enemies spawned while the door out was locked until either all they were dead, or you were.

"Yes, Sensei," I replied.

See, normally I'd be all over it, but my only real way to kill them, as far as I know, is extremely clunky and unreliable since I'm not built for ranged combat. I wonder if by increasing my Ninjutsu skill, the Lightning Kunai would do more damage? Probably. If I'm using a jutsu that requires a lot of precision to get any value out of it, I'd like to take them out in one shot instead of two.

We left the auditorium with my gaming instincts screaming at me that I wasn't going to get all of the story because I missed that one tape. The completionist is ranting and railing about how awful it was that I wouldn't be able to 100% my first dungeon and how everything was horrible and how dare Kakashi keep me on rails.

But my self preservation is busy stuffing the completionist into a tiny chest labeled 'do not open'. So we left the auditorium and while I was curious as to what kind of surgeries were performed in this house and who would be watching as an audience...oh, who am I kidding. I'm dying to know.

We took a left and proceeded to the next door. Inside here, however, was a lab.

There were chemistry tables, sinks, beakers, nozzles all over the place. On the tables themselves were actually what I would call predecessors to the wallies that I have gotten to know over the past few hours; vaguely humanoid shapes crumbled in concrete with ink running down along their skin in smeared seals.

Right in the center was a large, thick column of bookshelves and chalkboards. On the shelves, notes and data-sheets were hastily thrown together without a hint of organization, while chemical formulae were scrawled on the chalk-board. Even from here, it was clear he was trying to decipher some kind of genetic code.

Perception Check Success: 5/5.

Also on the tables of this large, round room, were tapes!

Four of them by my count and there's no enemies in this room. But I am noting some medical supplies, white boxes mounted on the wall.

Which told me that the next room was probably the boss room.

Oh boy.

"Sensei, can we take another break?" I asked, raising my hand. "I'd like to listen to these tapes."

"Sure," Kakashi said, sitting down with a bit more weight than I was expecting.

He must've been more tired than I thought.

"I can't keep waiting," This second tape started. "I can't keep it contained any longer. I haven't even seen this 'boy in blue' but he was supposed to at least come by the house once years ago. It...it's getting restless. I'm...I'm so...tired. Weary. Keeping it out from the eye of ANBU and Root is slowly becoming impossible. Eventually, the Avian will come out in public and then my shame will be complete."

Years ago?

Like when I graduated the academy?

Well, that's...lucky, I guess, that I didn't get on a team for so long.

But what's Root?

I saw that Kakashi's eye narrowed to an almost imperceptible slit.

Then he immediately cried out in pain. "Not now...not now...stop...he's not here. I know you're hungry...stop…"

The tape ended.

"Sensei, what's Root?" Hisako asked with a frown.

"It was a branch ANBU," Kakashi stated, his words slow and careful. "They were disbanded, I thought. If these tapes are telling the truth, then Root is still active, against the orders of the Hokage."

Oh. This is Shippuden stuff that just got blown open because of my game stuff.

"Next tape?" I asked.

Nichiren passed it to me and I put the one we just finished in a storage scroll.

This one didn't start immediately.

"...master…"

The voice was not human. It sounded like scratchy and high pitched, driving a pick through my eardrums. It was an animal mimicking human speech.

"...I can't find him, Master. I can't...I tried," The voice continued. "The mask people keep getting in the way. I can't find the boy in blue..."

Nichiren and Hisako looked as disturbed as I felt.

It was sobbing. "But...master...I made a friend. I met a man in green."

Man in Green.

That sent chills down my spine because I had met someone very similar to that years ago.

"He was so nice," The voice said, sounding oddly happy even through the tears. "He said I only needed to be patient...but it's hard, master."

Oh boy.

"...please help me, master...please help. I'm so hungry…"

Hisako gave me a hug. Slowly, I matched her, wrapping my arm around her waist as I stared at the recorder.

Nichiren pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose again. A nervous tick, not because he glasses didn't fit him. "This is terrifying."

"Yeah." I nodded. "Pretty terrifying."

"The more I think about it, though," Nichiren started. "I think the bodies we found in the attic were planted."

Hisako and I both looked at him.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"What was the first room we came to after the mansion rearranged itself?" Nichiren asked with a glare. "It was a cell block. Whoever lived in this house didn't need to store bodies in the attic. Not even a little bit. But we found them hanging there."

Wait, he's right. That doesn't make any sense.

"You think the butler killed those people?" I asked.

"He's our only suspect," Nichiren answered. "Because the butler, according to the tape we found in the library, didn't know about the house rearranging itself, so it made sense."

"Or maybe he did," Hisako said, her face taking a dark look. "And he was trying to lure Daisuke to the attic so the trap can spring."

"He didn't specifically hire us," Kakashi replied. "And there was no reaction to Daisuke's jumpsuit. No, I think Nichiren is right; the Butler was trying to plant the bodies and frame the master of the house for murder...only he didn't realize what else the owner was involved in."

"Third tape?" I asked, holding it up.

The tape started with the beast. Wonderful.

"No more," It rasped out. "No more hiding."

"We have to hide!" The normal voice demanded. "We can't just run out onto the streets of Konoha you stupid bird! You are no where near strong enough to fight an army!"

"But master said we have to devour the boy in blue."

"I don't care what that psychopath said." It was normal, and it was a snarl. "You are not throwing away everything I worked for just to fulfill your asinine purpose in life! Look what I built! Look what we get to enjoy because I was able to operate!"

"It doesn't matter," The bird replied, as disdainfully as it could with it's screeching voice. "Throw it all away. Hunt in the Leaf. Kill the people in masks. Find the boy. Fulfill our purpose."

How on Earth did it even leave the Mansion without getting immediately detected and deleted by ANBU?

"No! No, no! We talked about this. I am the one who hunts! I am the one who goes onto the streets so you don't get seen. I am..." The human sighed. "I-I can't do this anymore...I'm tired of this. Tired of you. Tired of being your minder. Tired of having to always fight to keep things together."

The bird was about to say something else, but the recording stopped.

So we are looking at a classic case of Jekyll and Hyde syndrome, a disease that, until today, I had assumed was complete fiction. Dissociative Personality Disorder was about as close as you get and that's really not close.

"Why would they want to kill you?" Hisako sniffed. Was she crying? No...but she was close. "This doesn't make any sense, you haven't done anything wrong!"

"I don't think the human guy wants me dead," I said, popping the tape out of the player. "It's just the bird and whoever its master is. For some reason."

There are RPG's, like Planescape, KotoR 2, New Vegas? That give the player character an entire past or something and the plot of the game is dealing with your characters past. I didn't like it then because it usually caused issues with the backstory I wanted to give my characters and I certainly don't like it now because there is no way I have a past of any kind that warrants this.

"Whatever the reason," Kakashi-sensei himself was oddly still. "We need to take them out."

10 Ryo said that the bird was right through that door over there. But I didn't say that because I had no idea what I could say without ruining my life for the rest of it.

"But the owner of the house left," Nichiren pointed out with a frown. "He's not here anymore. So he could have left Konoha to look for Daisuke in other villages."

"Good," Hisako snarled. "Let him look there."

"Let's...put in the last tape?" I suggested holding it up.

"Do it," Kakashi ordered.

I placed the last tape in the recorder.

Well, as far as video game plots went, this was acceptable. Contrived as all get out, but...it did it's job justifying the game play, even if that justification was as substantial as a shoe-string.

"The cage is finished." The human's voice was scratchy and rough. "I will lock myself within and let the Avian out. But he will be unable to leave. Since I will no longer feed him, he will starve. He will starve and I will be free."

Nichiren blinked. Hisako was gripping her kunai tight enough to make her knuckles turn white.

"If I somehow survive the birds death, it will be a stroke of good fortune," the voice continued. "If the boy in blue, whoever he is, reaches us before our death, the key to the front door is within the raven's stomach. Use it and the mansion's defenses will disengage. Be swift in dispatching the Crow. You cannot afford to make any mistakes, for your death at it's hands will not be a quick affair and it delights in causing pain. To the one who made the beast, I say this: I hope whatever abyss spawned you swallows you whole."

The tape ended.

Quest Updated: Nevermore.

Completed: Find a way out of the house.

Defeat the Avian.

So I have to kill the boss and loot the body.

A perfectly acceptable and time honored game mechanic. I approve.

I put the tapes and tape player in the scroll.

"So," I started, standing up and rolling my shoulders. "We've got a bird to go kill."

"You will not be joining the fight," Kakashi said flatly.

"Fair enough."

I mean, I don't want to die. It's a little disappointing to have to skip the boss fight but hey, it's better than dying because I screwed up somehow.

We ran over to the door and took our usual positions. Kakashi attempted to turn the knob...it was locked.

"Uh…" Nichiren started.

It was at that moment a steel portcullis dropped from the ceiling, barring the door off from us and behind us, things where sliding.

The column was sliding apart and slowly descending into the ground. On the back of the column walls, I could see bronze-looking bars. As the column finished descending, I saw a black, feathery thing curled up in the center of the podium.

It slowly stood up, it's bones creaking from stiffness, revealing a humanoid form. It's legs were claws, as were it's hands, with large feathers growing out under the arms. The head was all bird, its beak shining in the orange light of the lab.

The Crow spread it's wings and let out a massive screech that forced me, Hisako and Nichiren to cover our ears.

180/225 HP.

I felt my hands get wet as my ears began to bleed from the sheer screeching volume of this thing's cry.

Then it stopped.

It's head instantly snapped to look at me. Then it dropped to all fours.

Without a sound, the bird charged at full speed.
* * *​

Author's Note: Being honest with you guys, I'm really happy I was able to turn the mansion into a proper dungeon, with railroading and all. It sets a better tone of what to expect in the future and really sells the video game part of Daisuke life, with all the insanity that comes with it.

I'm also pretty glad I was able to much more directly incorporate some plot elements into this draft that, previously, were extremely subtle. I like subtle as a creator, but a lot of people missed it last time, like I said, so I'm doing away with the subtlety so it doesn't blindside you.

Also, I'm really liking Hisako and Nichiren more here. They're really coming together to help their teammate and they make me happy. Also letting Kakashi teach Daisuke jutsu, something he never really had to do in the first draft, solidifying his role as Sensei as opposed to assistant conflict ball.

I think that's it!

Shout out goes out too Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Ventari, PbookR, Seij, ChristobalAlvarez, Apperatus, EPiCJB19, Seeking Raven, Handwran, Russel Beatrous and Richard Whereat. Thank you all for your continued support!

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Chapter 7: Nevermore - Werecrow
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *

My first instinct was to Body Flicker out of the way and I made it! Mostly because Kakashi-sensei tackled the thing mid jump and kicked it to the ground, propelling himself backward. He landed on a back flip, smoothly uncovering his sharingan eye in a single motion.

I was on the other side of the room at this point, so the bird...man-bird...werecrow. The werecrow locked eyes on Kakashi and charged again. Everything seemed oddly muted, like I expected the Werecrow to weigh something and it's footfalls weren't making any sound.

Oh, right. He already popped my eardrums. That's actually a good thing since that means he can't just screech me to death.

Kakashi flew through a series of hand signs. "Lightning Style: Thunder Ring Technique!"

From Kakashi's hands flew four loops of lightning, snapping and cracking as they flew to the werecrow in an instant, who leaped into the air, wings spread. With a single flap, he let loose a storm of feathers right down on all of us.

I jumped to the right, watching with more than a little trepidation as the feathers completely embedded themselves into the concrete floor where I was just standing. Looking back up at the werecrow, it flapped it's wings and dove right for me!

Body Flicker away from him and wind up on the opposite side of the lab.

I wasn't thinking, I wasn't coming up with a plan, I was just scared.

The small, sane part of my mind said that I should stay close to the thing so I could pop him with Tsunade's Megaton Punch. I was specced for Taijutsu, running away was the antithesis of using it.

There wasn't a save game I could load if I screw up and this thing was terrifying. I wasn't sure I could fight it.

Come on, you coward! At least use Chakra Strings!

...wait, that's genius. Thanks, me!

I span around and saw that Kakashi had caught the werecrow's attention again, this time with a thrown kunai which exploded some point behind it as it charged my Jounin-sensei. Hisako and Nichiren were both out of sight, so I had to assume they had taken cover underneath tables in the lab, meaning it was just me, Kakashi and the werecrow.

"Lightning Style: Defensive Static Technique!"

Kakashi was surrounded by a lightning field. Arcing from his body, bolts of lightning struck the werecrow, who immediately jumped away with it's powerful legs and into the air. It faced toward me and started flapping it's wings.

Once, twice, thrice.

That was a lot of feathers.

148/225 HP.

Your head is crippled!

MY EYE!

WHY?

WHY DID IT HAVE TO HIT ME IN THE EYE?

OW!

OW!

JEEZEWHYWHYWHY-

99/225 HP.

It was at that moment that something large, powerful and angry land on top of me, slamming me into the ground and pinning me there. Massive talons dug their way into my torso, causing massive tides of blood to gush out of my heart and arteries. My whole world became pain, even as the thing span me around to look me dead in the eyes.

Your torso is crippled!

The only thing I saw in it's obsidian eyes was my reflection, seeing an eye that was popped and leaking red. It outstretched it's arms and started flying upward.

...I was going to die.

I was going to die and I was too scared and too hurt to do anything.

No.

It was going to drop me down on the ground and that was going to be it for Daisuke.

Wouldn't matter if I had armor, either, fall damage ignores things like Damage Reduction to prevent people from falling into black abysses and be unable to get out.

No!

Come on Daisuke, you've got a good shot at it's torso! What was the point of grinding all those skill points if you weren't ever going to use them?

At the top of the lab, the werecrow let go.

That's when I was able to act.

60/85 Chakra.

I created a series of chakra strings to tie me to the beast and pulled me, feet first into the bird, channeling chakra into my heels. With a splattered shower of blood and gore, I flew through the thing's midsection like a hot knife through butter.

Quest Completed: Nevermore.

Completed: Defeat the Avian.

9,200 / 15,000 EXP.

At that second, I realized that I could just use chakra strings to pull me to the ceiling, so I did and...when I tried to use the strings, the walls glowed with crimson seals, slurping them up like spaghetti noodles.

Oh.

Right.

Well, it was worth a try.

I think my heart would've stopped if I weren't so...not tired, but weary.

So I dropped.

I felt the blood I still had seemingly change direction as I started to fall. I was going to hit the ground and – Kakashi-sensei caught me thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou.

79/225 HP.

Great, I'm bleeding. That's...that's great.

Kakashi had also taken a few feathers, they stuck out of his flack jacket, circled by crimson blood stains. He was talking to me, rapidly, it seemed, but I just tapped on the side of my head. "I can't hear you."

After a moment, he gently passed me to Hisako's waiting arms, who cradled my head against her chest, tears running down her face. Looking off to the side, I saw Kakashi hold a gleaming, silver key that had bits of gore still caked to the ring.

He dashed out of my view, presumably to go unlock the door.

...why did it have to be my eye? I always hated eye-patches. I don't want an eye-patch.

We immediately went through the unlocked door. Wasn't there a portcullis? Probably retracted at the monster's death. Through the door was the cool breeze of the outdoors. Only a few minutes later, we were surrounded by ANBU.

Kakashi directed them inside the house. I carefully looked over to the door and saw that, indeed, there was still a lab through the mansion's front door. Thank goodness it hadn't rearranged itself after we left.

Well, good to see that the investigation was going to happen fast.

59/225 HP.

Kakashi took me from Hisako and he bolted it to the hospital. My head was the consistency of pate right now, or I'd be protesting this as unnecessary; I can't afford a hospital visit. I mean, I can, but there were other things I wanted to buy. Like furniture for my apartment.

...oh, it hurts…

I was placed on a gurney and finally, I was able to go to sleep. I'm sleeping for hours because I know the surgeons are going to want to do surgery or whatever.
* * *
As expected, when I woke up, I was not in pain anymore. Quickly, I reached for one of my storage scrolls and came up empty. I was wearing a hospital gown.

"You're awake!"

Hisako stood up, looking at me with a huge, relieved smile. She reached in to hug me. "I almost thought we lost you!"

I returned the hug and felt really warm inside for some reason. Just..I don't know.

"How are you still alive?" Nichiren asked, his eyes wide as ramen bowls. "You lost so much blood!"

"Don't question it," Hisako muttered, letting out a pleased hum as her hug got tighter.

"Believe me, I'm happy too," Nichiren replied. "But...I thought for sure you'd bleed out on our way to the hospital."

"Was it really that bad?" I asked.

Charisma Check Failed: 1/3.

Wait, failed?

Oh...shoot. My henge dispelled...and I was in a hospital gown.

"Does it matter?" Hisako asked with a huff.

"I mean...kind of?" I just shrugged, quickly reapplying my henge. "I'm just curious is all."

Hisako immediately frowned.

Charisma Check Failed: 4/6.

Okay, when I get my jumpsuit back, I'm going to think really hard on this encounter to find out exactly why she's upset. Maybe it's the same reason Ayame was upset and that it's sadness on my behalf? That would melt my creepy little heart.

I think I lost most of the blood during the initial attacks, then the Damage Over Time effect of the bleed affected me after the fight. Then combined with the particle affects of the bleed, if that even is a thing. Or maybe it's simpler than that and I just lost hitpoints as I lost blood.

Let's go with the latter.

"Though to be honest, I'm glad we made it out alive," I said with a smile. "Pulling a success out of a mission like that? Says good things about the future."

"No kidding," Nichiren replied. "I'm never asking the cursed question again."

"The mission was already going to be terrible," I rebutted, my brow furrowing. "You asking the question just annoyed me."

"But still."

"So, Daisuke?" Hisako asked. "Why are you using your old henge?"

I blinked and thought in confusion what she was talking about...oh. Right, I said I increased the strength of my henge. "Habit."

"He's probably still exhausted from the fight, Hisako," Nichiren came to my defense. "Just reverting to habit is all."

"Oh okay," Hisako nodded.

Then the door to my hospital room got kicked in.

"Where is he?" It was Naruto. He looked like he had just seen a ghost, rapidly looking around and eyes settling on me. He let out a massive sigh of relief as color started to return to his skin. "Daisuke! There you are! Are you okay?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Nichiren said, standing up and barring Naruto's path to me. "What are you doing here?"

"That's my best friend," I immediately said, hopping off the gurney. Not going to lie, seeing that Nichiren bought into the whole 'Naruto is a demon fox' thing really annoyed me. "Yeah, I'm fine Naruto."

He pushed past Nichiren and tackled me with a hug. "I was so worried! I heard you lost your eye and there was this haunted house and a giant bird and…"

Word travels fast.

"Who did you hear that from?" I asked.

"I heard the guy in the cool mask telling the old man about it," Naruto immediately said. "Before he told me that you were in the hospital. But...wait…"

He stepped back, looking me up and down with suspicion. "How come you look fine?"

"Bloodline," I answered immediately with a nod.

"You have a bloodline limit?" Naruto asked with shock.

"Yeah," I replied. "It's why I never had to train. I just learn things really quickly."

Naruto got this weird pensive look on his face.

Charisma Check Failure: 4/7.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/6.

Naturally, I knew this was probably because I blew up his world since he thought that training was unnecessary from what Ayame told me. Thank you, Intelligence, for coming to Charisma's rescue.

"And apparently, you can regrow eyeballs," Hisako said, taking out a kunai and a whetstone. "Really useful."

"Anyway, let's get on introductions," I said. "Naruto, this is Yamada Hisako and Nakamura Nichiren, my teammates. The guy in the mask was our Jounin-sensei, Hatake Kakashi."

"Neat!" Naruto said, adjusting the goggles he wore on his head. "I'm Uzumaki Naruto and I'm going to be Hokage! Believe it!"

Never understood the hate Naruto's little catchphrase got. He didn't use it often and when he did it was a way for him to assure himself that it was actually going to happen.

"Sure," Hisako said, slowly nodding. "You'll be Hokage after Daisuke."

"Nah," I immediately said. "I don't want the hat, Naruto can have it."

Charisma Check Success: 4/4.

Hisako blinked. "You don't want to be Hokage?"

"Nope," I said, shaking my head quickly. "I want to get extremely rich then retire in comfort. Wearing the Hokage's hat is the exact opposite of that, being constantly worried that the village is going to be okay, constantly thinking about protecting it and stressing over whether you made the right decision when push comes to shove? Pass. So if it gets offered, I'm turning it down."

Charisma Check Failure: 4/6.

Speech Check Success: 34/30.

"Exactly," Naruto said with a nod. "That's why I'm going to become Hokage and everyone will have to respect me and treat me like I'm somebody!"

He didn't listen to a word I just said. Then again, that's what happens when your Charisma doesn't make someone pay attention.

"I'll believe it when I see it," Hisako replied. "Still, it was nice meeting you, Naruto-kun."

"You guys taking off?" I asked with a frown.

"We need to file our mission reports," Hisako said, holstering her kunai and stretching out her back, pushing her chest forward so her shirt tightly hugged her burgeoning chest.

Charisma Check Success: 4/2.

She did that on purpose.

If she's doing things like that...I think she's got a crush on me.

"Yeah, Kakashi-sensei ordered us to get those done as soon as possible," Nichiren added, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. "You too, when you get out of the hospital."

"I'm walking out as soon as I get dressed," I said, rolling my shoulders. "See you all later."

Hisako and Nichiren walked out. Naruto turned to me.

"So your bloodline limit-thingy is why you don't train?" Naruto asked with a frown. "Seriously?"

"Yeah," I said, nodding. "Ayame told me you haven't been doing that?"

"I've been training," Naruto groused. "Just...not chakra control."

Charisma Check Failure: 4/7.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/7.

"Is it because I'm the one who gave you those exercises?" I asked with a frown.

"What?" Naruto immediately looked at me in shock, speaking quickly. "No, no, no, no. It's just that, you know, uh...I can't do the exercises! Yeah, that's it!"

Given how I watched him do those exercises when I first taught them to him, I don't believe him for a second.

Charisma Check failure: 4/6.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/7.

Obviously, he doesn't want to hurt my feelings or something. At least, that's my best guess.

"Okay, well, I can only reiterate that I don't want the hat," I said with a nod. "And that if you do those exercises, you'll be able to do the clone technique with no problems."

"Yeah, well, okay," Naruto said. He folded his arms and started to mutter to himself in what was clearly annoyance. "Why can't I be like you, who can just do things without any help?"

"Because I got lucky," I answered. "But hard work trumps luck every time."

"But you never worked hard," Naruto pointed out with a frown.

"Yeah well," I began with a glance off to the side, pressing my lips into a thin line. "Given recent events, that's got to change."

Naruto stopped muttered. "Okay. Well...if you need my help, come find me. I'm usually out by that old swing during lunch."

...that sounds like an opportunity.

"I'll do that," I said with a nod.

Quest Added: With Friends Like These…

Meet Naruto at the swing for training.

Oh. That's...actually, given my last quest, that's really ominous sounding. I hope things don't go sideways with this.

"Hey, are you okay?" Naruto asked with deep concern. "You got this weird look on your face just a second ago."

"I'm fine, just..."I shook my head. "It's fine. But I do got to get dressed so could you…"

"See you later!" Naruto said, turning on his heel and waving goodbye on his way out.

Finally.

My jumpsuit was folded up neatly on a table next to the gurney, on top of which were my sandals. After making sure the door to my room was locked, I got dressed.

I'm going to have to come up with some ideas because while I could say 'I'm just not good at the game' or whatever, I almost died. I need armor and defensive techniques. Using Tsunade's Megaton Punch, I was able to one-shot it, but I should've tried to use the Lightning Kunai. It was just too scared to even think about it.

...that's the biggest thing, here. I froze under pressure. It will not happen again. If I died, whose to say if that thing wouldn't have immediately gone after Hisako and Nichiren or finished taking out Kakashi.

I unlocked the door and...didn't walk out because I remembered that I needed to be discharged first or the Hospital would throw a fit

That sucks, I want out.
* * *​

The Hokage and Kakashi were sitting in the old man's office. A storm had brewed over Konoha over the past hour, with rain and the occasional flash of lightning and rumbling thunder. On the desk was a tape player, which both men were listening to intently.

"Play the third one again."

The Hokage's face was cold and impassive, puffing on his pipe while he listened to the creature's whimpering at the impossibility of his task. His finger tapped on the pipe in deep thought.

The tape ended and Kakashi leaned back in his chair.

There was a knock at the door.

"Enter," Hiruzen called.

In walked the Hokage's secretary.

"Kurogane Kumiko is here to see you."

"Send her in."

The secretary walked back out and in walked perhaps the most trusted woman in Konoha, the matron to Naruto's orphanage. She bowed. "You wanted to see me, Hokage-sama?"

"Yes," Hiruzen said. "I want you to tell me about Shimoda Daisuke."

"Well," She began. "He was always a quiet child. Stayed out of the way and kept his head down for as long as I knew him. He didn't even eat very often, but I guess it got much more pronounced after his Kekkei-genkai activated."

"Activated," Hiruzen said. "Explain."

"Shimoda-kun didn't always look like a living statue," Kumiko explained. "There was a time when he looked like any other infant. A little larger, perhaps, but that wasn't a bad thing. But after a year, he changed. It took us an entire day to figure out that the pale monstrosity before us was Shimoda Daisuke. That was when we alerted everyone."

"Did anyone come to the orphanage to speak to Daisuke?" Hiruzen asked, face impassive. "Anyone that struck you as strange or intending ill will?"

"I filed a report on the man who brought him to the orphanage," Kumiko said. "Did you want me to recount it?"

"I never received your report," Hiruzen replied. "So please do."

The room grew even more solemn and serious, punctuated by a lightning strike.

Kumiko cleared her throat. "The man who brought Daisuke to the orphanage...I had never seen anyone like him before. The tallest man I've ever seen. He was wearing a white lab coat and beneath it was a black, button-up shirt with a glossy, red tie. His hair was brown and he kept a well trimmed beard. But the strangest thing about him was his glasses."

Neither Kakashi or Hiruzen spoke, allowing her to collect her thoughts.

"It was like they had a permanent glare on them, blinding me if I looked at them from the wrong angle," Kumiko continued. "I remember this being strange because all the curtains were drawn; there was nowhere for his glasses to get such an omnipresent shine."

"What did he do?" Hiruzen asked.

"He simply deposited him here and told us his name," Kumiko replied. "We asked if he was the boy's father and he just laughed on his way out. When we tried to chase after him, he simply disappeared."

Kumiko shivered. "I'll never forget that sound. If ever there was a laugh that was truly horrifying, it was that one."

Hiruzen did not speak for an impossibly long moment, shadows cast over his face by his hat hid his eyes. "Were there any other visitors? Shimura Danzo, perhaps?"

"No, the Shinobi of Darkness has never come to my orphanage," Kumiko replied. "But there was one person who specifically asked to see Shimoda."

"Describe him," Hiruzen ordered.

"He was a handsome, respectable looking man," Kumiko replied with a nod. "Long black hair. Crimson eyes to put Kurenai to shame. The whites of his eyes were black."

"What was he wearing?" Hiruzen asked.

"He was wearing a green kimono," She replied. "Green and black. Across the shoulders and down the chest were imprints of scythes. He looked at the registry we keep of orphans at the front desk and he asked to see Shimoda. So he spoke with them and afterwards, he said he thought both boys were fine young men and that any sane parents looking to adopt would choose them as soon as they could."

Hiruzen puffed his pipe.

"But they were the only two," Kumiko finished. "And I have never seen either of them again."

"Thank you for your report, Kumiko," Hiruzen said. "Your assistance has been invaluable. Dismissed."

"Yes, Hokage-sama."

She left and Kakashi sighed.

"It appears that Shimoda-kun has made some powerful enemies," Hiruzen said. "Enemies that I believe he has been aware of for quite some time, if his mistrust of Konoha is any indication."

"Do you believe Danzo is this master the thing was talking about?" Kakashi asked.

"No," Hiruzen shook his head. "I believe that Danzo, the man in green and this 'master' the beast spoke of are all three separate individuals."

Hiruzen puffed his pipe, while Kakashi waited for Hiruzen to finish.

"But it is clear that Danzo is still running Root against my orders," Hiruzen continued. "He will be arrested, his assets seized. This insubordination and possibly seditious behavior must not be allowed to continue."

"Then maybe the man who brought Daisuke to the orphanage?" Kakashi asked. "But that doesn't make any sense. Why would he deliver Daisuke to Konoha just to try to kill him?"

"I don't know," Hiruzen replied. "But he is on our short-list of suspects, if for no other reason than because he is apparently involved somehow. I will make inquiries to see if we can find anyone that matches the man's description and if we cannot, we can only assume that Konoha was infiltrated and we'll need to make finding the hole in our defenses our highest priority."

"What about Daisuke?" Kakashi asked. "We can't just assume that the Avian was the only thing in Konoha trying to kill him. There could be other things."

"I am aware, Kakashi-san," Hiruzen replied. "I have had ANBU watching that boy since I first met him years ago. For the wrong reasons, it turns out. As a show of good faith, I will assign Shimoda-kun a body guard. A constant guard should cause any would-be assassin's and kidnappers some pause."

"Thank you, Hokage-sama," Kakashi said, standing with a bow. "That helps put my mind at ease. This is the first team that ever passed the bell test...I can't fail them."

"I understand," Hiruzen replied. "A boy like Shimoda must be protected at all costs."

"Is there anything else?" Kakashi asked.

"Beyond a standing order to report any sightings of this man in green or the man with the shining glasses if you see him?" Hiruzen rejoined, standing up. "No. Dismissed."

Kakashi disappeared through the window, leaving the Hokage to his thoughts.

Hiruzen walked over to the window, rain pouring and cascading down from the clouds. Lightning struck somewhere out of the village.

Shimoda my boy, Hiruzen thought, shaking his head. I believe I've had you all wrong for the past few years. I wasn't annoying you, you were scared of me.

The even rhythm of raindrops on the windows was almost soothing, in a way. Though it all worked out in the end. If I had allowed you on a team, your favored blue wardrobe would've made you a target long before you could've handled this.

He took a long inhale of his pipe, exhaling the smoke through his nostrils.

But I have to wonder where you've got these enemies from, The Hokage continued to himself. You've only been on a team for a short while and have killed no one before this.

Lightning struck right in front of the window, and Hiruzen didn't so much as flinch.

He couldn't shake the feeling that if he knew where Daisuke truly came from, where the man with the shining glasses brought him from, everything would make sense.
* * *

Author's Note: And that's the end of Nevermore!

I must say, I am much, much happier with how this rendition of it turned out compared to the previous one. I'm going to try to have a couple of breather chapters before diving into the Organ Trail, just to have Daisuke and Naruto patch up their friendship and have some character bonding between Daisuke and his bodyguard.

...I don't really have much else to say.

Shout out too Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Ventari, PbookR, Seij, ChristobalAlvarez, Apperatus, EPiCJB19, Seeking Raven, Handwran, Russel Beatrous and Richard Whereat! You guys are awesome! Thank you for your continued support.

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Chapter 8: Getting It Together
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *
If there was anything in the world I was grateful right now, as far as the game goes, it's that I never have sleepless nights.

I just plop myself down on a bed, engage the sleep command and I wake up refreshed and rested in the morning.

Still had nightmares, though. They were annoying and reminded me of what happened when you became a Vampire in Oblivion; terrifying dreams.

Last night? I had a nightmare about the Brotherhood of Steel nuking Konoha and attacking it with Liberty Prime. Naruto died in my arms from Radiation Poisoning...but I didn't wake up until the game made me wake up.

So a good and bad thing.

Logically, I know that having a Nightmare means that my brain is processing what I've gone through by whatever insane scenarios it causes. But it was still unpleasant. Still, I'll take the nightmare over lying in bed for hours at a time trying to get to sleep.

As I was walking around, pacing, thinking. I was too stressed out to even think about breakfast and since I didn't need to eat, there was no over powering urge to sit down and eat a bowl of instant ramen at least.

Yesterday, Kakashi-sensei came to see me as I was discharged. He told me that I was to report to the Hokage's office this morning at nine. Apparently, I'm being assigned a body guard, which had me on edge. The more someone is around me, the more likely they'll notice that I am not of Konoha and then I'll really be up a creek.

It's just nerves, but nightmare scenarios are easy think about, especially after the House.

Is it time to go?

I've still got a few minutes.

Okay, look. Daisuke. Relax. Focus on what you want to accomplish. What's a good thing that happened today?

Well, our mission got bumped up to A-rank and we're being paid as such. Which means that I get to go on a shopping spree and finally get some furniture for my apartment. Might get some armor, but frankly, furniture is cheaper.

Besides, I think I'll be able to make my own armor in another level or two, maybe earlier if I can find some Fuinjutsu skill books. With carbon nanotubes, because I can.

When it was time to go, I took to the streets. Looking around, keeping a close eye out for any other horrifying monstrosities that would run out of the midday shadows to grab me like the werecrow had wanted to do.

Then the thought occurred to me that there might be a sewer level at one point.

My nose twitched and my nostrils flared just at the thought as I hurried along to Konoha's headquarters.

The Academy was the same as I remember it; I need to remember to scour the Genin section of the library for skill books tomorrow. Today is furniture and planning day, tomorrow is progress day.

Up the stairs I went until I came to the Hokage's receptionist. A pretty girl with long purple hair, which was different from the last time I had been by here, where it was a brunette with her hair in a bun. I think the ANBU run different shifts or take turns if they want something boring.

"Hi," I said, waving to her. "Shimoda Daisuke, here to the see the Hokage?"

The receptionist looked up. "Go on up, he's expecting you."

"Thank you."

The Hokage's office was up a bunch of stairs on the highest level of Headquarters, which shared a building with the Academy for reason's that aren't exactly clear to me. Honestly, I'm just wondering why the Receptionist's desk is way down here because…

I came to the office and knocked.

"Enter."

Open the door and came to the office, which was just one desk in a massive room that could easily be renovated to let the receptionist have her desk up here so people didn't have to run up a million miles after talking to the receptionist.

At the desk sat the Hokage, and across from the desk was...well.

I can't tell whether I should be happy or frightened.

If I'm reading the room right, my body guard was Mitarashi Anko. Her short purple hair was tied in a spiky and pointed bun. She wore a tan trench coat over her transparent mesh...those abs are amazing. Just...wow.

Anyway, Daisuke, don't ogle. You remember how she cut Naruto's cheek open with a kunai and licked up the blood; she's crazy.

I walked up and bowed. "Hokage-sama. Reporting as Ordered."

"Shimoda-kun," The Hokage said with a wide smile. "Now, I believe that Kakashi-san told you that you were being assigned a body guard? Allow me to introduce Mitarashi Anko, she'll be your daytime bodyguard."

"Nice to meet you," Anko said with a grin, bowing herself. "Hokage told me to blew a bird-thing clean in half."

"I did," I replied with a nod. "So if you're my daytime bodyguard, whose got the night shift?"

"I have ANBU watching over you while you sleep," The Hokage replied easily. "You don't need to worry about anything."

Perception Check Failure: 5/6.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/7.

Nice way of saying he already had people watching me without admitting to it.

"So is this a temporary arrangement?" I asked. "No offense, Mitarashi-san, but…"

"It's until we can be sure that threats to your person have been dealt with," The Hokage replied.

"You're stuck with me until we've killed the bad guys," Anko answered with a smug grin.

I shrugged. "Fair enough."

"Hey relax," Anko said, trying to go for a more friendly smile. It worked. Kind of. "I'm going to stay quiet and out of the way. The Hokage just wants you to have a public face to your protection. That's it."

"So you're just going to be hanging around me all day?" I asked.

Honestly, it's not that bad. Reminds me of my mission, actually. The two year long one, back in my old life before that car crash.

"Pretty much," Anko replied, nodding. "Hanging back, on the constant look out for threats, ready to eviscerate someone at the first sign of trouble. You know, bodyguard stuff."

Charming.

"Alright, well, I guess we can get going after I get my payment," I said.

"Yes, that's right," The Hokage said, reaching for something in his desk and pulling out a voucher. "Here you go. You've been well compensated for your work at the house."

I took it. Yup, A-rank. "Thank you, Hokage-sama. Is there anything else?"

"Nope, both of you are dismissed."
* * *
I...well, we, went back to the streets. First destination was a furniture store, so I was walking...and turned around to face Anko while I was walking. "Could you walk beside me, please? Having you trail behind me is freaking me out."

This actually made Anko pause. "No can do. Keeping you in my sights is the best way to do my job. Some one jumps you, I got a clear view."

I mean, facts. "Okay, but what if someone jumps you?"

Anko stopped, then laughed. "Look, kid-"

"Don't call me kid."

My response was automatic a little more hostile than I had wanted it too be, but still.

Anko stopped. "Look, Daisuke. You don't need to worry about me. You're the one who needs guarding. I'll be fine. Behind you!"

Easily, I slid around the obstruction, an old man moving forward with his walking stick. He looked at me like I was crazy, but I ignored him. "Thanks. But seriously, it makes me feel weird that you're trailing behind me."

"Well, that's too bad," Anko replied with a frown. "I've got a job to do."

I blinked. "Fine. Just don't trail too far behind."

Anko smirked. "I won't."

Right. Not my missionary companion, my bodyguard. Don't know how I slipped into that pattern again, it's been over fourteen years since I got home. Anyway, furniture store.

I walked inside, grabbed a sales person immediately. Grabbed a single sized bed with it's appropriate frame, a sofa, a recliner. A dinner table small enough to fit in my kitchen with four chairs. Night stand, lamp, alarm clock that I didn't need with my internal clock...aesthetics, you know?

The entire time, Anko trailed behind me, uttering not so much as a peep as she watched me go through furniture. Eventually, we finished and I was able to store it all in a set of storage scrolls that I had labeled Grand Room, Bed Room, and Kitchen.

With that done, I still had enough cash to grab some office supplies from the store down the block. One sheet of Chakra Induction Paper, which was more expensive than the other types of paper by far, a collection of pens and several clipboards.

Those will make sense later.

Last place? Lunch.

Not Ichiraku Ramen, I just wasn't in the mood. An Akimichi restaurant because they had the best food. We were sitting down with a waiter taking our order. Placed my order of steak and looked across the table to Anko. "Alright, what do you want? My treat."

"Oh, I don't need anything," She hurriedly said, waving me off. "Don't worry-"

It was at that second that me, the waiter and Anko all heard the impossibly loud sound of a stomach rumbling.

I grinned. "That wasn't mine."

Anko went pink, her eyes wider than the plates here in the restaurant. "I...uh…"

My grin just got wider.

She let out an embarrassed sigh. "Knew I was forgetting something…"

"Seriously, I want to treat you," I said. "Think of it as a way to get to know each other since we're stuck together."

Anko pressed her lips together in a thin line. "Alright, I'll take the Seared Marinated Duck. If it's not too much trouble."

"Nonsense!" I waved it off. "No trouble at all."

After we took our orders and I paid the whole thing before Anko could even take her wallet out. Because screw it, I felt like being generous.

"So," I said, leaning back. "What kind of mission is this? B-rank? A-rank?"

"S-rank, actually," Anko said with a nod.

"Ah, that's why you signed on to babysit me," I replied. "Makes sense. How often do you get paid?"

"Every other week," Anko replied, folding her fingers together and laying them on the table. "So yeah. It's a pretty awesome mission."

"A little boring, though," I suggested as our orders were delivered "I don't think anything is going to happen for a while."

"Hope so," Anko said, taking up her chopsticks. "So...just so we're clear, Shimoda-kun, I want to keep this professional."

...I really hate it when people refer to me by my last name. Just irks me. "Same. I'm not looking for a relationship right now."

"I'm glad we're on the same page," Anko replied. "I don't want to insult your generosity or anything, it just seemed like you had other intentions."

"Nah, I don't think it'd be a good idea," I agreed, nodding and slicing off a bit of steak. "I really don't think you'd be my type."

Anko got this look on her face. "Have you heard about me before?"

Speech Check Success: 34/30.

"I heard one crazy story that you like to cut people open and drink their blood," I answered, remembering that scene in the manga right before Naruto went into the forest of death. "Sounded like garbage to me, but I didn't know you personally."

She let out an irritated breath. "Alright, who did you hear it from? Was it Hatake? Maybe that old man Okawa?"

"It was a while ago," I said, hoping she'd take that as meaning that I didn't remember. "But is there any truth to it?"

Anko picked up a piece of duck with her sticks. "Sometimes I intentionally freak people out if they're annoying me. I like pulling pranks. I'm kind of morbid. But I'm not a bloodthirsty snake-demoness or anything. Honest."

"I believe you." I nodded, plopping the piece of steak in my mouth and reveling in the taste.

Yeah, I need to learn how to cook. Stuff is delicious.

"Good," Anko replied, looking down at the plate with a frown.

"Still, if I'm annoying you, why haven't you tried freaking me out?" I asked because I just had to know.

"Call it a gut feeling," Anko started with an overly sweet smile. "But I think I'd find myself out of a mission if I tried."

I smirked. "Gotcha."

From what I remember, she was Orochimaru's apprentice. I'm not going to ask about it just because I know she despises him and is on the side of angels...sort of… but maybe she might be of help when I'm working on my seals.

I'd like to pick her brain, at least.

Anko moved to take a bite, but stopped once again to look at me. "Thank you for lunch though...I really appreciate it, I don't want to sound ungrateful."

"You're welcome."

She took a bite and moaned from the delicious food. I found myself wondering how it would sound in a...different context.
* * *
After lunch, I just had one more think to buy. A gallon of milk and some chocolate syrup.

Because we had chocolate and syrup and it had been way too long since I had chocolate milk.

And because I needed to do an experiment.

We came to my apartment and I opened the door. "Come on in, make yourself at home."

For me, I got to work setting up the furniture. My grand room quickly had a sofa and recliner in it, with a coffee table sitting between then. The kitchen table and chairs set up and then I walked to my bedroom and got the bed and everything set up there.

Next, it was time for me to work.

I returned to the grand room and saw that Anko had taken a post by the glass door to the balcony. She hadn't removed her shoes, but the carpet didn't register any footprints.

Well, that was polite of her, I guess. First thing's first...I need the coffee table out of my way. I just sealed the table back into the scroll and placed the scroll on the sofa. With that, I unsealed the milk, syrup and seal paper.

...then the Chakra Induction Paper.

Time to see what element I am.

With the slip of paper stuck between my fingers, I channeled chakra into it.

The world around me got blurry and a green text box showed itself.

Choose an Element:

Fire.

Wind.

Lightning.

Earth.

Water.

Oh, that's neat. Is time paused? Yeah, time is paused, I'm not breathing. Alright. Uh...lightning. I love lightning. Lightning is awesome. Lightning means electricity, which paved the way for the modern world and the internet, which I missed horribly.

I picked lightning and the world immediately cleared up. The piece of paper in my fingers quickly shriveled up into a ball.

Element Affinity: Lightning.

You've got a shock in your system! Lightning Jutsu now cost less chakra and are more effective.

With a satisfied nod, I tossed the crumbled up piece of paper over my shoulder and started work.

I unsealed the stack of eight-by-eleven paper and the sheets of seal paper I bought, as well as the pack of pens, hurriedly torn open. With several clipboards to write on, I got to work.

Chakra: 0/85.

Chakra Strings hoisted the seal paper, getting the sheets into position while grabbing the regular pieces of paper to hold around me, also lifting the pens and clipboards so I could write and take lots and lots of notes.

First thing is first.

Melee needs to be my weapon of last resort. Not because it's weak, but because it's situational. The werecrow was fast and it could fly, making melee a bad choice until I could catch it by surprise. If it weren't for it's sadism wanting me to die from fall damage, I would be dead.

Then there were the wallies, which had demonstrated immunity to melee period. I couldn't reasonably fight until Sensei taught me the Lightning Kunai, which is a cool jutsu, I guess, it's just something that needs to be spammed and it taking handseals to have one bolt come out just makes it a terrible jutsu.

Good for beginners, I guess.

But I can convert the technique to Fuinjutsu, which means that I just feed the chakra into the seal and it can spam the jutsu out as much as I want, allowing for machine-gun action. That would make the jutsu go from borderline useless to the Most Effective Tactic Available.

Well, I'd have to be careful of wind users, since it's a lightning Jutsu. But still. I wouldn't have to worry about running out of shuriken since my chakra comes back really, really quickly. Empties quickly, comes back quickly, like in Fallout, where I had Action Points instead of Chakra.

In essence, it means that my jutsu aren't necessarily limited by my chakra pool, but are instead effectively limited by a timer. Since draining my chakra meant I was up a creek until it came back, large, chakra intensive techniques should be saved for the end of the fight.

What I intend to do is use my Mixing Seal as the basis for an assembly line seal. I put in raw materials in the input and then in the output, I get a finished product. In this case, a blaster pistol.

I started drawing a rough sketch of the pistol I was going to build, with the dimensions needed to house the Lightning Kunai seal. I think a revolver-esque design would work best; the empty chambers in the cylinder where bullets would normally go would make for a lot more surface area for writing seals on.

Being honest, I'm going to need a lot more skill points in Fuinjutsu before I can create this assembly line thing that I'm envisioning, but books for Fuinjutsu shouldn't be that hard to find. At least, we should have some in the Library on the Genin level.

For armor, I know that Jounin wear Flack Jackets and those are okay, their nylon inserts provide a little protection. But for me, I'm going to go with a more modern looking bullet proof vest with inserts with, again, carbon nanotubes. Way more protection than ballistic nylon.

With luck, I can use the seal to repair and maintain my gear. Because while I was able to find additional jumpsuits after I was discharged, I'd rather not have to replace things every time they break. I should be able too.

Moving on from there, I need to start working on supplies. Medical kits to fix up my crippled wounds, canteens of water for raw HP regeneration, bandages, antivenom and other medicine. Seriously, I have no business being caught out in a combat encounter without healing items. A bedroll is not good enough. Sure, we don't have Stimpacks, but that doesn't mean I should ignore the medical field entirely. And of course, I should ask Kakashi-sensei for medical jutsu. Even if I can't cast it, just knowing it would be enough for me to create an item or something that lets me heal myself and turn Chakra into health. Chakra regenerates, health does not.

From there, there's more esoteric tools.

...like Genjutsu.

Look, I've always thought that the mind is sacrosanct. I don't want to mess with someones brain, especially not throwing how they see the world into chaos. But...these are people that want to kill me. They want me dead. If Genjutsu is what's going to save my life, I need to use it.

But I am not going to sleep well on the night that I finally use it.

Still, it gives me an idea; Genjutsu operates through you sending your chakra into another person's chakra system to send faulty signals to the brain. Well, what if instead of sending signals, I'm just analyzing what's already there? Like mind reading.

That way it's more like eavesdropping on a person's plan to kill you and it's less stomach churning. For me.

And then, if you're just analyzing what's already there, you don't even need to directly focus on one person, you can send a wave of chakra out to everyone around you, like how killing intent makes you think your very soul is in jeopardy.

...come to think of it, could you use an opposite of killing intent to keep people calm?

Like a Calming Intent?

And then, what else could you use it for? Happy Intent? Sad Intent? Erotic Intent?

...I blame Anko over there for that last one.

Anyway, let's shelve the easily abuse-able techniques for much later. Mind Reading would be a serious boon. You know who already has a monopoly on mind screw jutsu? The Yamanaka clan. Isn't Ino in Naruto's year? Yeah, she is. Pity she's so wrapped up in trying to win Sasuke over.

Anything else?

There has got to be a way to weaponize my henge.

I mean, beyond the sexy jutsu which Naruto nearly lost a tooth over when he tried it on me. What could I turn into that would make the partially illusion, partially literal transformation an actual weapon to use in combat? Turning into your opponent's is good, just a little situational and I don't think I can pull it off.

Turning into an animal is mostly illusion and doesn't bring with it the benefits of, say, flying if you turn into a bird.

My mind briefly flashed back to the lab with the werecrow and I hurriedly shook it off.

Well...could I turn invisible? Basically, turn into myself, just completely transparent.

There's got to be a reason no one's really tried it before. I know that the Second Tsuchikage was a terror for how he could turn invisible, a technique so powerful that even the Hyuuga couldn't see him. But a henge would be a purely visible change. Sure, it'd still leave a chakra signature but most Shinobi as I understand it wouldn't be able to take advantage of that.

I took a moment to review all the notes I took on the pieces of paper, going over the blueprint I made of the gun, then the notes I took of the assembly line seal.

Yeah, this all looks good. Now for the experiment.

I quickly laid all the paper down on the sofa and drew in my chakra strings.

Chakra: 85 / 85.

From the kitchen, I withdrew the milk and chocolate syrup, along with a bowl and a glass. Back in the grand room, I placed them all down on the floor and brought a seal sheet to the floor in front of me.

I saw Anko look on with interest but I just continued on. I created a mixing seal with a marker, and placed the glass and bowl in the input circle. In the cup, I poured the milk. In the bowl, I squirted out large amount of chocolate syrup.

Fuinjutsu Check Success: 27/25.

And then beside the assembly line, I started working on the reversal, bringing over the pieces of paper with a pen and started trying to engineer how to do the mixing seal process in reverse.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/8.

That was a bit more complicated than I thought. Not because it was more complicated, necessarily, but because I had to change more than I expected. Whatever, we should be fine now.

I stood at the right spot and placed my hand down, storing the milk and chocolate in the seal and started to combining process.

If all goes well, I should have an empty bowl and a cup full of perfectly mixed chocolate milk.

Then in a small flash of light, out came the cup and bowl. The bowl was completely empty. The cup, however, still had white milk in it.

Well, it was a partial success.

Perception Check Success: 5/4.

The liquid level in the cup was higher than when I poured it, so something happened.

I went to the kitchen to fetch a spoon and came right back to dip the spoon in the cup. When I withdrew the spoon, it was coated in chocolate syrup, which was in turn coated with a thin, white film of milk.

"Huh," I heard Anko say in response.

"That's a little disappointing," I replied. "Still, it kind of works."

"Yeah," Anko agreed with a respectful nod. "It's impressive, though. I wouldn't have thought to try that."

"Thank you."

I used the spoon the manually mix the chocolate and milk and placed it on the next seal...the seperator. With the bowl since the goal is to get the syrup back in the bowl. I started the process, causing both cup and bowl to disappear and then reappear on the opposite end of the paper.

It was a success, kind of. The bowl now had half the chocolate milk from the cup, with no meaningful separation between milk and syrup.

Back to the drawing board, I pulled the clipboards in front of me. I need to increase the power and effectiveness of the array, obviously, but I need to figure out how to do that. Maybe by taking this line over here, expanding this section?

But if I expand this section, then I need to reinforce this part and then make it smaller. But then if I do that, I'd need to rearrange the I/O circles. But then if I do that, then the array needs to completely change.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/7.

Fuinjutsu Check Failure: 27/45.

After a while, my plan for the array turned into this massive, incomprehensible blob and my eyes were starting to go cross-eyed. At the end, I simply had to give up because I didn't know enough about Fuinjutsu to create a better seal.

I was rubbing my head with groaning. The chocolate milk only soothed my nerves, it did not do anything about this headache.

"May I take a look?" Anko asked, stretching out her hand with a small smile.

"Sure," I said, handing it too her.

She looked over the design, rubbing her chin with narrowed eyes. "I think you should shelve this for the day."

"Why do you say that?" I asked, standing up and stretching.

"Because," Anko began, handing me back the clipboard. "If you're finding yourself adding complexity and then trying to compensate for that complexity to solve a problem, it means that you're missing the simple solution and if you come back later, you'll find it."

She doesn't have a failed Skill Checks telling her she sucks and everything is horrible.

"I guess," I replied with a shrug, throwing the clipboard on the sofa. "Who told you that?"

"My," Anko began, her expression darkening. "My old Sensei."

Charisma Check Success: 6/6.

"You know, I wouldn't mind talking Fuinjutsu with you," I diverted quickly, sensing a need to change the subject. "Not even in a teaching capacity, I just think it's fascinating."

Anko smirked. "Well, we can certainly do that. Actually, I have a book on Fuinjutsu that I could let you borrow."

"Yes!" I fist pumped.

Anko's eyes got a little wide in surprise.

"Oh, uh," I started, a little embarrassed. "I really like books is all."

She just started laughing.

I sighed. "Alright, well. I got some more planning to do then we got to go. I'm meeting my best friend once he gets out of the Academy today."

"More planning?" Anko asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yup."

She grunted, a little surprised. "That mission really scared you, huh?"

I stopped, unsure of how to respond. Because, well, duh, but how do I actually articulate it? Do I even want too?

Speech Check Failure: 34/50.

Shut up, game.

"Sorry," Anko immediately said. "I shouldn't have said anything. It's just...it happens, you know? It's fine. Nothing to be ashamed of."

I was quiet as I cleared a place to sit on my new sofa. "Thanks."

My little black book had a permanent home in my back pocket, along with a pen that I used to write in it. It also had a note section, but I found that since it was so small, it was insufficient for my note taking before hand. It was here that I'd plan my level ups. All the other stuff is replaceable. This...this had to be in English.

This was where I planned my progression as a character.

I was going to leave my Chakra Control where it was, and wait to find two more skill books to raise it to 100 or failing that, I'll raise it to 100 when I've got the other skills up to 80. I'll have enough skill points to max the good number of them out.

My mid-game priority is to get Fuinjutsu to 80. Once that happens, I can work on Ninjutsu and Genjutsu for late game, when I can cast multiple jutsu at once without hand signs. At that point, I might as well grab that snazzy gray suit I saw while clothes shopping.

Level 7 will bring my Fuinjutsu to 44, by dumping all 17 points into it. Level 8 will bring it to 61. Level 9 will have it be 78. At level 9, I'll finally have it to 80 and then I can start putting points into Medicine. Why Medicine?

Because in the original Fallout's, you could get implants that permanently increased your SPECIAL stats. I think I've covered this before, but since I'm writing it down, I want to make it official. Given Elemental Nation's obsession with Genetic Engineering and making the strongest Shinobi ever, there has got to be a way to make a Genetic Therapy which will permanently raise my stats. It might take a while to actually complete the therapy, but Medicine will at least allow me to make my own in the event that I can't find it.

The perk for level 8 will be Fuinjutsu Enthusiast, which increases the general power of my Fuinjutsu by 10%. Because more powerful seals are a good thing. Then there's Tattooed Armory, which I can get at level 10; that basically does the same thing a Fuinjutsu Enthusiast, but only for seals written on weapons and armor and it's a 15% bonus.

At level 10, grab Chakra Seals, because being able to write seals without ink and proc a Summoning Contract without blood is amazing.

Level 12, I'll grab Toughness, which will increase my Damage Reduction from it's current 15% to 25%. Taking a quarter less damage is good.

Level 14, there's Adamantium Skeleton, which will literally infuse and coat my skeleton with an indestructible metal.

Going further, I'd like to unlock One Handed Jutsu, but that has a requirement of 60 Ninjutsu, Genjutsu and Chakra Control and I'm not going to have the requirements for it until much later. So...put that on the back burner. Level 16, I might as well grab Lady Killer.

Because I'm male and I firmly believe that any woman in my position would be perfectly within her rights to grab Black Widow.

Then there's Elemental Affinity, which...there's a ton of them. There's the basics, allowing me to have the rest of the basic elements. From there, there's the combinations. Yeah, there's combos. They have level requirements, though. So if I wanted to use Fission Release, for instance, I'd need Fire, Air and Lightning perks, and then I'd need to take the perk for Fission Release itself.

There's only one that's got my eye right now, and that's Creation Release.

Toy with the very powers of creation and laugh as you warp the very laws of the universe! You now have access to Creation Release.

I'm going out on a limb here and say that it's Level 50 requirement is justified. Of course, I think that's a perk you get once the game is over and you're ready to just start screwing around. The idea of anything that can challenge a player when they've effectively got God Mode on is terrifying.

I mean, what could do that?

One of those BS bonus bosses that make the main villain look like a chump?

The biggest Kaiju ever?

Another god?

...I'll have to keep my eye out.
* * *
Author's Note: I wanted to keep going with Daisuke's future plans, but I don't have them all planned out myself. Because he's not leveling up so quickly and because his leveling curve is so different and toned down from last time, a lot of the timing of the previous perks has been shifted to late game. Besides, it seems like a good place to leave it off.

I got a question about Daisuke's rest – does he heal rapidly over the course of an hour when he takes a nap, or does he only snap to healing at the end of his rest. To this I say...thematically, the latter works, but because it makes more sense, we're going with the former. He heals rapidly over the course of an hour.

I hope everyone enjoyed Anko's introduction in this draft. In the previous one, she wound up drifting too far, too fast away from what she was and frankly, canon Anko would've laughed at first draft Anko in a fit of condescending rage. So here, I'm recalling that Anko sliced up Naruto's cheek with a thrown kunai and licked the blood off his face to shut him up when he made fun of her. So...yeah. Far cry from the woman that Daisuke married in the first draft.

Any thoughts on any of this, or in general, would be appreciated.

Shout out goes out too Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Ventari, PbookR, Seij, ChristobalAlvarez, Apperatus, EPiCJB19, Seeking Raven, Handwran, Russel Beatrous, and Richard Whereat. Your continued support makes this possible!

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Omake: Galactic Plumber - Daisuke, the foodie?
So... I've been racking my brain to come up with what hobbies a less mission/training obsessed Daisuke would fill his free time with, and I think I've got something. Foodie. Consider that his initial sealing experiment was making chocolate milk, that in the old draft one of his just for fun actions was bringing pineapple into existence, and that Konoha has access to some of the most diverse and plentiful food resources of the elemental nations.

Most importantly though, it creates a jumping off point for the audience to create food omakes that can easily be made canon at any time, boosting the mood of the thread, and introducing people to stuff they may not have tried. Observe.
-

Croque Madame

The hardest ingredient to find was the Gruyere cheese, but Konoha's market was thankfully up to the task.

Preparations began with a simple bechamel, white gravy, with just a little salt, and a LOT of pepper. This was followed by grating a truly hilarious amount of gruyere cheese. From there it was on to construction in a nice hot skillet.

Simply butter and toast up a couple slices of a nice thick, crusty loaf of bread. First layer of the sandwhich was a generous coating of bechamel. Second was a the first pile of gruyere set to melt. Third was a healthy serving of sliced ham. Fourth was the second pile of gruyere. Fifth was the other buttery toasted bread with a slathering of the bechamel on both sides, but it still wasn't done.

Sixth was the last pile of Gruyere to melt over it all, and finally seventh was a simple fried egg with a runny yolk to amp the rich savory flavor to the max. A truly powerful breakfast option.
-

Okay that was the first attempt at a food omake. I went for an impersonal writing style, because convincingly conveying the mannerisms of a character you didn't create, and haven't written for is hard. Hopefully it's the start of something beautiful.
 
Chapter 9: With Friends Like These...
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *
Now that my plans were all settled, for the most part, I had some time to kill before I went up to Naruto for With Friends Like These. I had some cash left over so I was hoping I could find some kind of nick-knack like an amulet or something that could boost my stats more. Charisma was always welcome, but something that boosted my Perception wouldn't go amiss.

Getting killed by a sneak attack is probably one of the worst ways to die in all of gaming. Frustrating as dying can possibly get.

So I made my way down to the clothing store. We passed by the armory and that incredibly shiny armor available in the window pulled my attention the entire time I was passing by the window.

Anko was, of course, trailing behind me. It still unnerved me, but I was going to have to get used to it. She had some very good reasons to be back there, after all.

Inside the store, I quickly got over to the clothing section, started digging through the bargain bin.

Sure, none of what was held inside had anything resembling Damage Reduction, but I was looking for miscellaneous stuff anyway.

At the bottom, I found a pair of goggles.

No Damage Reduction, but it had a +2 to perception.

"Nice," I muttered to myself, slipping them onto my forehead.

Immediately, my vision felt like it was wiping away a slight fog over my eyes that I never noticed was there. My ears were filled with pines and needles for a brief moment and my tongue was coated in electricity. Last but most impact, my skin started to crawl. All of this happened at once and was over really quickly, but not before a shiver went through my spine that shook my whole body.

Immediately, Anko's hand on was on my shoulder and she turned me around to look into my eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, actually!" I replied with a grin. "Something just went really right."

"And what was that?" Anko asked, blinking in confusion.

"Eh, maybe I'll tell you later," I answered, shrugging and turning to head to the cashier.

Bought the goggles, took off the price tag and stuffed the receipt in my pocket. If I remember correctly, there was a jewelry store off in the Konoha's town square and if I wanted to find an amulet or something that would be the best place to find one.

I found it, moved inside and immediately got the impression that I was too poor to even know that the store existed. Diamonds and gold everywhere. Still, I got to browsing.

Behind me, I got a glimpse of Anko looking around, her eyes lingering on the display counter filled with diamond rings to the right of the entrance. Engagement and wedding rings. After just a moment she turned back to me and, upon seeing that I was watching, glared. "What, kid?"

Perception Check Success: 5/5.

Charisma Check Success: 6/6.

She was embarrassed at having been caught looking. But... "Don't call me kid."

She took a breath and let out an irritated sigh. "I'm sorry. Is there something wrong, Shimoda-kun?"

"No, I just thought those rings were pretty." And they were! But she's not allowed to call me kid.

"Okay," She replied, looking past me to return to her vigil.

Now, to get back to shopping.

The cool part about all this jewelry is that almost all of it had Charisma Boosts. Sizable charisma boots. That ring over there would be enough to drop my henge with it's +7 bonus. But they were also ludicrously expensive. As in, several S-class missions worth of pay expensive. But there had to be something I could actually afford here.

"Can I help you, sir?" The woman behind the counter was dressed in a beautiful dress kimono.

"No," I replied flatly, watching as my HUD showed me the items on the rack, their stats and their price. Really handy.

"Very good," She replied with a bow. "And you, Madame?"

"No, I'm just with him," Anko replied, sounding annoyed.

"Are you two together?" She asked hesitantly.

"She's my bodyguard," I immediately said to head off any misunderstandings.

I didn't need charisma to remember how annoyed I got at plots that required them.

"Ah, I see," She replied, nodding. "Please don't hesitate to inform me if I could help you with anything."

"I'll be sure to-found it," I said, plucking the amulet off of the display rack.

Unlike most of the product here on sale, it was made entirely out of bronze, from the chain to the amulet itself. As for the centerpiece, it was a small circle barely bigger than my thumb with a blank space for a character. It was easily the cheapest thing in the store, and it was the cheapest by far.

It also offered +1 Charisma.

"That thing?" She asked skeptically. "Are you sure?"

"It's the only thing I can afford right now," I replied wryly.

"Ah, well then, let me ring you up," She said.

"Can I get it engraved?" I asked, wondering if I could increase it's stat value.

"Certainly, I can put a design on the amulet, but I will need to charge a fee. What would you like?"

I cupped my chin in thought. "The Kanji for 'Heaven'."

Because if there's anything that could increase stats, it has to be something cool and dramatic like that, right?

"Of course," The lady behind the counter slowly went through a series of hand signs and placed her hand on the amulet. After several seconds of of chakra throwing sparks into the air as it cut through the metal, it was done.

Sadly, it gained no statistical advantage. But I liked it, so I went through with the purchase anyway.

I left the jewelry store with my amulet in hand and...wait, is this a good idea with Anko standing right there? I mean, she's bound to see something just because she's always around me and, to be frank, it's dumb to think I can pull one over a Jounin with a Sneak of 17. But then, I wasn't arrested or anything on account of my 'Premonitions' so...I think maybe I can get away with a little bit more. I slid the amulet on. Immediately, I could feel the usual shifting of skin tone and vocal cords, as well as my bone structure shifting slightly.

Anko walked out in front of me, her head tilting. "Shimoda-kun, excuse me if I'm overstepping my bounds, but what just happened?"

"Well, I put on an amulet and it made me look better," I replied with a grin, trying to not let it show how my heart stopped.

"I saw that," Anko began, scratching her temple, her eyebrow raising higher with every syllable. "That wasn't your henge getting stronger, either."

"I'm going to be perfectly honest with you," I said leaning forward. "I've got no idea."

Wasn't a lie, either. Just because I know I'm a video game character doesn't mean I understand the scientific quirks of how I operate.

She let go. "Huh. Well, I can see why the Hokage is interested in keeping you safe."

"Yeah," I said, keeping the relief out of my voice.

You know, it just occurred to me that regular S-rank pay is a lot of money to be paying someone for a long term mission, which means that the Hokage's is expecting something bad to happen sooner rather than later.
* * *

The academy was about to let out for the day, which meant that it was time to go see Naruto.

At the end of every day, I could find him sitting on the swing, sideways, being depressed about his lot in life. Honestly, it was sad...and annoying. The kid had the tools to turn his life around. He had the ability to pass the tests, but he passed with a C. A C! And for some reason he thinks that's good enough. Many people said that he didn't get the right instruction from teachers that ignored him, but he's got Iruka now and he's always had me.

Besides, the main reason the other kids didn't like him was because he talked.

A lot.

All the time.

I mean, the whole reason he pulled pranks on people was so they'd stop ignoring him, but the kids at school ignored him because he'd go on and on about becoming Hokage without backing it up with test scores. I remember the fandom being really, really nice to Naruto, saying that his incredible chakra levels were just too much to handle at such a young age.

I mean, the guy had the chops to master the Rasengan, a jutsu that requires such ridiculous chakra control that I don't believe for a second that he can't do a regular clone.

Even if he had to use an extra set of hands at first.

Naruto's my friend, but he's a blowhard. Sure, he's trying to cover up for feelings of low self worth, but that's what he is. And I'm afraid he'll keep being a blowhard until he gets drenched in the cold water of desperation and the near death experience that is Mizuki and then the follow up with the Land of Waves.

...listen to me complaining. Come on, I told Naruto I don't want the Hokage title, he should've started the exercises or maybe I just need to try a different tact.

Charisma Check Success: 7/6.

Or maybe his pride will only let him accept help from someone that isn't me. If that's the case, then there simply isn't anything I can do. The only person who can convince Naruto he needs to change is Naruto.
...come to think of it, why are Naruto and I still friends?

We don't have any similar interests, pretty sure he still thinks I'm an obstacle to his life's mission and we don't even talk anymore. Screw it, let's see if Naruto and I can rekindle our friendship. If not, well, that's okay. I guess.

Kind of hurts, but it's what happens when people grow apart.

...seriously, he was my only friend for years, this feels kind of like a betrayal. But people grow apart, don't they? It happens. Naruto and I...grew apart. I'm very sad now.

No, no. One more chance.

Quest Updated: With Friends Like These…

Talk with Naruto.

Complete: Meet Naruto At the Swing for Training.

I got to the Academy and saw Naruto on that one swing.

"Hey, Naruto!" I called with a wave.

He perked up and waved back. "Hey, Daisuke!"

As we closed the distance, his eyes narrowed. "Daisuke, you have a stalker."

I chuckled. "Nah. Uzumaki Naruto, this is Mitarashi Anko, my bodyguard."

"Wait, what?" Naruto croaked, looking between us two in shock. "You got assigned a bodyguard?"

"Yeah, apparently, the Hokage doesn't want people just running up to me and trying to kill me in the middle of the day," I said with a shrug. "I have no idea why, it sounds like fun."

"Sounds like that's why," Anko wryly cut in with a smirk. "Nice to meet you, Uzumaki-kun."

"Oh, nice to meet you too," Naruto replied, sounding surprised.

"How was the Academy today?" I asked.

"It was okay," Naruto shrugged. "I'm getting better at the Bunshin, though!"

Charisma Check Success: 7/7.

I blinked.

No, he most certainly was not.

"So you can make a working one?" I asked with what I hoped was a friendly smile.

Naruto got this sheepish look on his face. "N-no, not exactly. But I am getting better at it!"

No, no. I am not getting into this argument again. "Well, I can't wait to see it when you finally pull it off."

"Yeah, it's going to be awesome!" Naruto agreed. "And I don't need any stupid chakra control exercises to do it!"

I frowned. "You do you."

Things fell kind of quiet, until Anko stepped in.

"Naruto, do you think I could get your help, really quick?" Anko asked innocently.

"Uh…" Naruto started, looking surprised. "Sure? What do you need?"

"It's been a while since I've used a Bunshin," Anko replied, rubbing the back of her head with an embarrassed smile. "So long that I forgot. Do you think you could teach me? I'd like a reminder."

Charisma Check Success: 7/7.

Intelligence Check Success: 10/6.

She's lying through her teeth, but she's doing it to see if Naruto's missed something when he was learning how to do the Jutsu.

...Anko is smart.

"Wait, seriously?" Naruto asked, his jaw agape. "How could you forget one of the academy three? It's like one of the most important jutsu we'll ever know!"

"Yeah, it's pretty embarrassing," Anko agreed sheepishly.

"Okay, so in order to do the Jutsu, you have to..." Naruto went through the motions. Except half way through he got confused, and he got confused because he forgot a couple steps.

...he was probably paying attention in the same way a kid fantasizing about all the stuff he could do with the jutsu would be; half and half.

After a few minutes, Naruto slumped forward in shame and sighed. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Anko said with a smile. She took a second to look around. "Now, if I remember right…"

She went and added the few steps that he missed to cast the jutsu as a question, like she was asking a smart and experienced Ninja if that's how it was done, which he agreed. Then he tried again and…standing right next to him was a perfect Bunshin.

Naruto's jaw was agape. "I did it...I did it! I DID IT!"

He shouted and cheered, jumping up and down while pumping his arm around this inanimate holographic copy of himself.

"Thanks for the reminder," Anko told him with a congratulatory smile. "It helped me a lot."

"Oh, you're welcome, Mitarashi-sense- I mean Mitarashi-san," Naruto replied, bowing rapidly.

For my part, my jaw was on the proverbial floor.

See, I had been assuming that Naruto's chakra control was poor and that's why he couldn't do it. I didn't realize it was straight up because he didn't actually know how to do it properly. I thought he was paying attention in class. He said he was!

...and my crappy charisma-deprived self believed him.

Holy cow I am dumb.

"I'm going to go show the old man!" Naruto shouted, dismissing the clone in a puff of smoke. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

His disappeared into the academy doors leaving a trail of dust that reminded me of the Road Runner.

Anko was chuckling under her breath and shaking her head.

"Mitarashi-san?" I asked, standing up.

"Yeah, what is it, Shimoda-kun?" Anko asked with a smile.

"You're a genius."

She straight up laughed and gave me a thumbs up. "That's right! And don't you forget it!"

"I won't," I replied with a nod. "The way you got to the root of the problem without making assumptions and then completely disarmed his pride so he'd accept help from you was the most brilliant social maneuvering I think I've ever seen. You've got a real gift for teaching."

Speech Check Success:36/35.

Her bravado was gone and she started scratching the back of her neck with a pink face. "Well, I mean, yeah, but, I mean, I don't think it was that good and...yeah."

"Have you thought about teaching at the Academy?" I asked. "They'd be lucky to have you."

"You think I'd do good at the academy?" Anko laughed. Her face was starting to graduate from pink to red. "I've always wanted to teach at the Academy, but I don't think they'd let me."

"How come?" I asked curiously.

"Too much baggage," Anko answered with a sigh, wistfully looking at the Academy doors. "But maybe someday."

"Well, even if they're too dumb to accept you," I started. "You'd make a heck of a mom."

Then she just laughed, a harder, bitter sound than the one before hand. "Yeah right, Shimoda."

"I'm serious," I assured her.

"Please. No one wants to have kids with me," Anko growled with a shake of her head. "Anyway, I think we should get moving."

Charisma Check Failure: 7/9.

I'm not even going to try to dissect her reasoning because I know now that my best guesses are completely wrong.

My musings were interrupted by an explosion. I looked up to see that the Hokage's office at the top of the Academy had been blown to smithereens, pieces falling to the ground below. Kids in the playground scattered at the large stone pieces collided with the slides and climbing walls, throwing up dust everywhere.

Quest Updated: With Friends Like These…

Get to the safe house.

Completed: Talk with Naruto.

But Naruto!

Perception Check Success: 7/7.

Jumping down from the tower, I saw the Hokage, his robes flapping in the wind. Falling and landing opposite the old man, was a Ninja I had never seen before, a man in black robes, his entire right arm coated in bandages.

Great. Two S-class Ninja fighting in my village. Who cares about the collateral damage, am I right?

Anko grabbed my arm. "Daisuke, we need to get to the nearest safe house. Now!"

"But Naruto!" I shouted back, pointing up at the Academy.

"The Academy is filled with ANBU," Anko said quickly. "I swear to you that he's fine. But you need to follow me now, okay?"

...she had a point and there's no way he was able to get to the Hokage's office in time to be there for the explosion. He was probably getting shepherded to the safe tunnels inside Hokage mountain as we spoke.

"If he's not fine, I'm going to be upset," I growled.

She nodded. "Come on!"

Taijutsu Check Success: 80/65.

I twisted out of her grasp and hopped onto her back, my feet sticking to her spine. "Move, it's faster this way!"

There was this odd hesitation, but then she took off like a rocket.

It's a good thing that I had my hands free, because the second we started taking off, we started getting attacked. By Leaf Shinobi. Shinobi that I had never seen before, at least I don't think I did, were coming out of the woodwork, charging at us with Kunai. Shuriken whistled over and past my head and I could here the sound of jutsu being discharged in the distance.

Anko let loose an army of small snakes that slithered at her feet, biting the Ninja attacking us and sending them into convulsions.

I looked up and saw ANBU soldiers charge the aggressors with kunai, leaves orbiting them like shuriken and a pair of Wakizashi. On the opposite side of the street, up on the roofs, we were being pursued in parallel by these traitorous Nin.

They threw a series of shuriken at us.

Chakra: 60/85.

With invisible strings, I grabbed the shuriken and threw them off course and fired a Lightning Kunai up at them, hitting one in the shoulder, creating a charred crater through the uniform.

Note to self, put points into Ranged Weapons; that was supposed to be a head shot. But I can see why this Jutsu wasn't really seen in Canon; by the time you have the precision to use this Jutsu effectively, you had more effective options by the truckload.

Directly behind us, a Nin was chasing after us, dodging and stepping around the snakes. But the second he stepped on the sewer cover, said sewer cover flipped open like a coin that had been tossed and the Shinobi disappeared.

Perception Check Failure: 7/10.

I didn't even see what happened.

What was that?

Anko stopped suddenly, immediately turning down an alleyway and stopping at a plain wooden wall. She bit her thumb, ow, and drew a circle on the wall in her blood. This activated a seal network on the wall, causing the planks to separate and reveal a door, which Anko pulled open and ran inside.

Quest Updated: With Friends Like These…

Defend the safe house.

Completed: Get to the safe house.

The inside was two rooms, a front room on the left, a large couch and two recliners arranged around a table which had mats arranged around it. On the right was a kitchen and dining room combination, and I wondered how well stocked the kitchen was.

Dividing the two sides of the safe house was a staircase that went up and ended at a fork with two rooms on either side.

"Okay, we should be safe here," Anko said and I noted that her face was just a little bit flushed, and not all of it was from her mad sprint to get us here.

Charisma Check Success: 7/7.

It's because I was standing on her back? Weird.

"So what was that?" I asked, rolling my shoulders.

"Well, the Hokage told me he put out an arrest for Shimura Danzo," Anko explained. "Apparently he's been running some super-secret-black ops group that the Hokage ordered disbanded years ago. Hokage-sama expected him to make some kind of move on you or Uzumaki for collateral. The Hokage's had Naruto watched over by ANBU for years, so I know for a fact that he's fine."

"Thanks," I said. "Now let's start barricading things up, we aren't out of the woods yet."

"This safe house is completely secret," Anko said with a raised eyebrow. "No one but the Hokage and I know about it."

"Then how did he get it built?" I asked with a frown.

"I helped build it," Anko replied with a raised eyebrow. "This morning."

Oh. Huh. "Well, I'm sure you read my file. Did you get to the part about Premonitions?"

"I know you sometimes get text-prompts on future events," Anko told me. "I also read that it's mostly a to-do list."

"Well, you know what the next item on my to-do list is?" I asked rhetorically. "Defend the safe house."

Anko sighed. "Alright, well, let's pile up in one of the rooms and wait it out. I guess."

"Cool," I said, jumping up the tall staircase in a single bound. Open the door on the left, then the one on the right.

They were both the same bedroom. No windows, a single bed and a nightstand. The one on the right was interesting, it had a book on the nightstand.

Shuriken Interception: A Practical Treaties.

Skill book for Ranged Weapons? Score.

I turned to Anko, who was standing in the doorway. "Is this one yours?"

She nodded. "Yeah, but you can borrow it. I asked the Hokage to help me get some books in here since you love to read."

I beamed. "Thanks!"

"You're welcome," Anko replied. She got a little pensive, looking to her right and then back to me. "So, what kind of books-"

She didn't get to finish her question, as the safe house rocked like an earth quake was going on.

"You're joking," Anko breathed, getting her balance. "Okay, stay here. I'm going to put those Root idiots in their place."

She threw open the bedroom door, snakes emerging from her sleeves like she was possessed by the Darkness and she charged down the stairs, to the sound of battle. I stuffed the book into a storage scroll and made a mental note to return it when I got back.

...you know, every person she kills is EXP that I could be getting to level 7. But I don't want it on my record that I'm uncooperative, that could make my life difficult later. Besides, I will get to level 7, I'm not going to stop getting missions and stuff, so.

At that second, the door to my room flew open, and two Leaf Shinobi charged forward.

Chakra: 75/85.

Chakra string myself to the ceiling and pull myself up. Dodge their grabbing hands. Use strings to pull myself back down to them and plunge my knife-hands onto their necks.

10,200 / 15,000 EXP.

Their necks exploded like shaped charges all over the floor, coating it in a thick spaghetti sauce like slurry of gore. Their bodies fell straight to the floor and the heads rolled over their backs and onto the floor. One of them wound up under the bed, the other facing toward the wall.

My hands started shaking again, by body coursing with adrenaline and I felt like I was going to be sick. It's okay, Dai. They were trying to capture you and do who knows what to you. It's okay Daisuke. You're fine.

You know, that was enough EXP to make me think that the only reason that worked was because I'm as specialized as I am and I caught them by surprise. If they were a bit better prepared for what I could do, this would've been a tough fight.

The sound of footsteps drew my attention, and I saw Anko, blood splatters dotting her cheeks and staining her hair. She saw the corpses at my feet and she immediately paled. "Shimoda-sama I…"

Downstairs, we could hear more people showing up. Anko got ready with her kunai, and then relaxed. "Hokage-sama! I'm glad to see you."

"Mitarashi-san," The Hokage arrived, in black jumpsuit and armored helmet, carrying a staff. Upon laying eyes on me, he smiled. "Shimoda-kun, I'm glad to see you're well!"

"Thanks, Hokage-sama," I said, bowing. Time for me to help Anko save face. "Mitarashi-san is so cool! She ripped these guys heads off and then charged down stairs to feed them to her snakes. It was so awesome, Hokage-sama! You had to see it!"

Charisma Check Failed: 7/10.

Speech Check Success: 36/30.

The Hokage didn't believe a word of it, I'm sure. But he simply smiled. "I'm glad that Mitarashi-san is doing so well in her duties."

He turned to her. "Move to safe house B with Shimoda-kun and await further orders and double time it. The streets still aren't safe."

"Yes, Hokage-sama," Anko replied with a bow.

Quest Completed: With Friends Like These…

15,200 / 15,000 EXP.

Bum-bum-bum-Bum!

Level Up!

Well...that's interesting. I thought this would be a more involved quest. I wonder if there were different ways it could go, like if I followed Naruto to the Hokage's office or something. Or maybe the quest is in reference to how we had to hide in a bunker when the Hokage and Danzo had a falling out?

I think it's that last one. Huh.

I wonder what more I could've done in this quest? Maybe if I took the initiative, I would've gotten more quest objectives?

Maybe.

I put all 17 points into Fuinjutsu, bringing it to 44. No perks this level, sadly. I couldn't wait to get Fuinjutsu Enthusiast next level.

200 / 18,000 EXP until level 8.

"Hey, what happened to Naruto?" I asked immediately when the world unpaused. "He was on his way to see you before everything went crazy!"

"He's in a safe house guarded by ANBU," The Hokage answered. "He is perfectly safe and unharmed, Shimoda-kun, you may rest easy."

"Good," I said, nodding. "Good."
* * *
Safe House B was four blocks down and behind another blood lock, which made me wince in sympathy even though she didn't seem to mind it at all. As the entrance closed behind us in the very similar safe house, Anko spoke up.

"Shimoda-kun?" Anko asked.

"Yeah?" I asked.

Anko bowed. "Thank you so much for sticking up for me with the Hokage. I didn't deserve it for letting those two get past me. I apologize and I assure you, it will not happen again. I will do better."

I blinked. "Thank you. But seriously, I don't think they got past you, I think they blew a hole in the room across from us while you were distracted downstairs. You were totally fine."

"Be that as it may," Anko replied. "I still made a poor judgment call and it compromised your safety."

I shrugged. "Being honest, I'm glad it worked out this way. I was hoping to see some action."

"You did amazing," Anko pointed out, almost sounding reverent. "Root has some of the most intense training I've ever heard of and you took them out flawlessly. I can't even."

"There's a reason I'm being guarded," I said wryly.

"Do you even need a bodyguard?" Anko asked with a frown.

"I like having a bodyguard," I said with a grin. "You're fun to talk to."

Her frown turned upside down, her face going pink again. "Thanks. I, uh, well, um…"

You know, her attitude changed drastically from 'let's keep this professional'. This is like the third time she's blushed in the last hour.

"Anyway, I'm going to go upstairs and read," I said, pulling her book out. "Let me know if any more of Danzo's goons show up, I could use a proper workout."

"Ah ah." Anko shook her head, making to follow me. "I'm not letting you out of my sight again."

I just shrugged. "As you wish."

You know, this did prove the power of Tsunade's Megaton Punch. The sheer importance of having a Disc One Nuke in your possession in a world like this one really could not be overstated and is the only reason I am alive right now. It's like finding the Alien Blaster in the first ten minutes of Fallout 3 like my dad did somehow; makes even supposedly difficult encounters a breeze if you play it right.

Being a good little explorer, I checked both bedrooms again. In the first bedroom was a skill book. Sealing Ninjutsu: An examination of Fuinjutsu Theory.

Score.

I jumped on the bed, and cracked open the book on Shurikens. Anko took a post by the door and smiled when she caught me looking. I smiled back and started my book.

The most important difference between a shuriken and a kunai is that…
* * *​
Character Sheet: Shimoda Daisuke.

Health: 230.
Chakra: 85.
S.P.E.C.I.A.L Stats:

Strength: 4
Perception: 7 (+2)
Endurance: 5
Charisma: 7 (+6)
Intelligence: 10
Agility: 5
Luck: 10

Taijutsu (Endurance): 80
Melee Weapons (Strength): 15
Ranged Weapons (Agility): 29
Genjutsu (Perception): 33
Ninjutsu (Endurance): 29
Speech (Charisma): 36
Barter (Charisma): 27
Sneak (Agility): 17
Pick Lock (Perception): 21
Fuinjutsu (Intelligence): 44
Medicine (Intelligence): 27
Survival (Perception): 37
Chakra Control (Intelligence): 92

Perks:
Taijutsu Enthusiast
Comprehension
Educated​

* * *​

Author's Note: Giant announcement.

I deleted Patreon.

Before I go into why, I want to thank everyone for their support. Don. Darkama. Chris, Melodychii, Niluka Satharasinghe, Sackthananban Kounlavong, Tlavoc, Zeroharm, Megrisvernin, Miu, Chris, Raven Uzushi, A Person, Nex19, Paloswag, Cole Deucalion, Jacob A Bridgewater, ladiciusevol, Steelcondor, Anonymous, Perseus Red, Trashmage, Ryan, Axodique, Vladtheinhaler, PostLifeSyndrome, Juane Pendragon and Samuel Reed as well as the Super Patrons Melden V, Anders Kronquist, Ray Tony Song, Volkogluk, Aaron Bjornson, iolande, Martin Auguado, Julio, Hackerham, Tim Collins-Squire, Maben00, Ventari, PbookR, ChristobalAlvarez, Apperatus, EPiCJB19, Seeking Raven, Handwran, Russel Beatrous and Richard Whereat. Thank you all so much for your continued support, it helped me out a lot. Words cannot describe my gratitude toward you and my love to you.

The reason it's gone is because, well, I've fallen below the bar. My writing schedule has fallen to pieces. I haven't updated weekly in months and I felt like I was letting everyone down. To say nothing about how I never wanted to make money off of my Fanfiction in the first place. I firmly believe that trying to profit off of my fanfiction did more damage to my writing than I will ever be able to quantify. I will never make this mistake again. If I want to monetize, it will be original fiction and I will do it by designing and selling shirts or something. That way the people who love the fic will be getting more than just a spot in the credits and I won't feel like I'm begging anymore.

I love you guys; you deserve your fanfics for free. That's the whole point; fanfiction is free entertainment.

Words cannot describe how relieved I am right now. Thank goodness, thank gracious, thank everything and their mother that it's gone.

...yeah, that's it. I think my schedule is going to pick up now since that stressor is gone. Writing can go back to being entirely my passion project. For my patrons, thank you. You guys helped me learn a lesson that I should've just known a very long time ago.

Have a cookie, all of you. You guys are the best.

Until the next time.

~Fulcon


 
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Informative: Naruto's Summon Animal - GalacticPlumber
Less of an Omake than it is a semi-serious theoretical ramble, but summoning jutsu without a contract is a fascinating look at both how someone is characterized, as well as how the given author characterizes the animals in question.

Naruto is primarily a good-natured prankster with severe loneliness, boundless energy, and with a touch of darker emotions like jealousy.

A good pairing to that would be foxe- WAIT don't scroll past while rolling eyes on the typecast I'm going somewhere with foxes.

If we bring foxes as depicted in Japanese mythology, where Naruto as an anime gets MOST of its references, we stumble on the trickster foxes known as kitsune.

Like Naruto, mischief and pranks are their bread and butter. Like Naruto would very much benefit from kitsune are often depicted as fiercely loyal to those they form close bonds with, and breed in large numbers with fluffy tails, doting personalities, and emotional support. They also have a ruthless streak a mile wide, because foxes breed quickly enough to naturally outpace their common food sources. This leads them to view the kits of OTHER foxes as simultaneously a food source, and the removal of competition for their own kits.

This is interesting from a character standpoint, because it gives Naruto everything he wants, but also encourages both the best, and worst parts of his personality at the same time.

This is interesting from a mechanical standpoint, because it allows the presence of foxes in story who are actually good at things they're generally depicted as being good at as opposed to just big shows of power with no subtlety.

Again foxes are all about pranks and deception, which is borne out by kitsune unilaterally being good at things that would be called genjutsu in ninja parlance. Illusions, mind effecting of various flavors, improving one's own senses, and direct sensory manipulation of others.... you know the whole nine yards. Yes illusions and sensory manipulation are different. You can make a clone jutsu that looks like you that everyone sees. That's an illusion. Putting an image of yourself overlaid on someone's senses, that is specific to them, is sensory manipulation.

Getting back on point why is this good with Naruto specifically as opposed to just correcting a horrific wrong of fox portrayal? Their skill set natively fills the deepest hole in Naruto's skill set. It would also give him access to be terrifying effective at the only discipline Daisuke almost completely neglects which would only make it more attractive to him.

As for if he'd get in? Kitsune are pragmatic, alarmingly intelligent, observant, and self-serving. He has the highest chakra reserves for his age of most any human alive, looks like the child doppelganger of his father the late hokage, has status as the container of Kyuubi as the worst kept secret of all time, and has active ambitions to become the ruler of one of the strongest human nations. What self-respecting, self-serving mastermind wouldn't want to get on his good side, help him reach his goal in any way possible, and proceed to have the ear of one of the most powerful people alive?

Naturally they don't open with looking that cynical. Friendship, cuddles, free training, the benefits of partnership, and all that good shit. The loyalty I mentioned earlier would even be legitimate. Relationships that start for transactional reasons are still relationships, and kitsune can be relied upon to keep the spirit of deals with people they form relationships with.
 
Chapter 10: Interlude - A Larger World
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *
Hiruzen entered his room feeling and looking more tired than he had ever been.

His black bodysuit was torn, his old, wrinkling skin showing through the gash near his side. Hiruzen removed his helmet, letting it fall and roll across the floor.

Today was, unequivocally, the worst day of his life.

Starting when Danzo had the gall to stomp into his office. His old friend demanded to know the meaning of his assets being seized and why his arrest was ordered.

But his old friends single eye narrowed and he went unnaturally still as Hiruzen had explained it. The jig was up. His deception had been exposed. Root was being dismantled to the core.

The old man still remembered the exact moment things had turned violent. He was pressing herbs into his pipe. After a puff, he started talking. Hiruzen was angry, of course. Having been lied too and betrayed not once, not twice, but three times now.

Orochimaru. The Uchiha.

And now this.

A mansion which siphoned many children to Root.

A monster that should never have been able to find safe haven within Konoha's walls.

There was no end to the vitriol he felt.

At the end of his explanation came this gem of a line.

"So run. Run away and we'll all pretend that you died making the sacrifice you didn't have the spine for all those years ago."

That was when it had turned violent.

Danzo's rage had surpassed any rational thought, much like Hiruzen's own. But, Danzo was a one trick pony, whose entire style was built around wind jutsu.

One trick ponies were Hiruzen's favorite opponents. Because their chosen method of fighting always had a weakness, usually one beyond the lack of versatility. Danzo's was a crippling inability to fight melee, which meant that all Hiruzen had to do was call out his monkey in a barrel.

But Danzo had gotten away.

He had gotten away and Hiruzen, again, had failed.

He stumbled forward to his bed, collapsing forward onto the soft matress with an aggravated sigh.

Ever since Minato died, Hiruzen had done nothing but fail. He failed his village when Orochimaru was performing experiments on its citizens. He had failed when Danzo had systematically isolated the Uchiha before executing them for their eyes.

And then he had failed here.

Hiruzen had retired for a good reason; he was unfit for duty. It was as simple as that. He was not a young man anymore and he was keenly aware that his mind was failing. He feared it, dreaded it, did what he could to keep himself sane enough for the job, but senility was rearing it's ugly, ugly head.

The old man simply couldn't perform anymore.

But what could he do?

The people who everyone agreed were qualified for the job didn't want it. Others who understood the responsibility were politically contentious or, in the case of Nara Shikaku, too lazy. Those who were eager for the job, such as Hyuuga Hiashi did not care for the responsibility to the village as a whole and would grant his clan even more special privileges after Hiruzen had spent years trying to take those privileges away.

He had hoped the nonsense with Kumogakure would finally break them of their Caged Bird Seal tradition, or at least bloody their nose by forcing them to brand their Clan Head. But Hizashi stepped in and stopped the clan from actually learning anything from the ordeal.

Because of course he did.

Hiruzen slowly rolled over in his bed, face up.

Yet more evidence that his mind was failing and undoubtedly, the clans all knew it. That's why they wanted to keep him in this position, to take advantage of it.

Oh, why did Minato have to die? Hiruzen impotently raged, glowering at the ceiling. Why did that accursed fox get loose and take Konoha's brightest hope for the future away? Why does such an evil thing get to still live while the greatest Shinobi that Konoha had ever known must rot in the bowels of Death itself?

But still, he must press on.

This latest failure was the last straw.

Jiraiya, Tsunade, someone had to take the hat. Someone had to step in where he clearly could not.

Kakashi? Probably, but only if his old wounds could heal. Chōza had the right temperament, but wasn't popular enough with the clans outside the trio they formed with the Yamanaka and Nara. Maito Gai was too eccentric in a village full of eccentric war machines.

Perhaps Naruto could do it?

Hiruzen snorted. The young man, full of hot air and grand ambitions, had a lot of growing up to do before he was ready for such an awesome responsibility. But one day, he would be a splendid Shinobi.

Shimoda?

Hiruzen almost dismissed this as quickly as Naruto, but then he thought. The boy was wise beyond his years, that much he had gleaned from his observations. Incredibly skilled and talented from study alone. From his attempts to remain friends with Naruto, to how he helped his team pass the bell test, and his kind demeanor toward his bodyguard, he had true empathy.

No, something beyond that.

Daisuke had something that was rarely instilled in in Shinobi, even in Konoha.

It was goodness.

If that was his eccentricity, his coping mechanism when society had effectively quarantined him to the corner like a leper, then it was the best possible outcome. Deciding in the face of isolation that he would be the best person he could be was not easy, but it was more than laudable.

But Hiruzen didn't think he was ready for the hat. Good though he was, he was still too insular, too removed from the village. The village council and clans would never allow him to govern. Plus, the boy had stated that he had no desire for the hat which oddly made him even more suited for it.

Perhaps he'd be the sixth or seventh Hokage, if it truly came down to him.

But then, Naruto might be ready for his Father's legacy, and that seemed oddly important to restore.

It's not like Minato could be returned from the dead.
* * *
"They actually survived."

Kakashi was standing at the memorial stone, as he often did.

It was early in the morning, the sun had barely risen over the horizon, it's ascent covered by the dense trees reaching for the sky.

He looked down at the memorial, a smile had painted itself across his face and hid behind his mask. His single eye was squinted but that didn't stop the sparkle from shining through it.

"I can't believe it," Kakashi continued. "Obito...and Rin, if you're listening, but they survived. All of them. The mansion, it changed when we walked into the attic. When I saw the dungeon, I thought for sure one of us was dead."

The breeze drifted along the grass, almost like the stone itself was humming in thought, listening intently as Kakashi spoke.

"I was going to do everything I could to make sure that if one of us died, it would be me," Kakashi continued. "Because I swore I'd keep them safe. Monsters were pouring from the walls. The house had been built by an enemy of Konoha. An enemy that appeared right when we got to the end. A bird-person."

The wind kicked up again, and died just as quickly. A nod, perhaps.

"I feel strange just saying that out loud," Kakashi muttered wryly. "But it's true. A bird-person who had been looking for Daisuke-kun for years, apparently. Years! Wanted to kill him. He almost did, but he survived."

He let out a sigh and the wind blew past his back, like it was reassuring him.

"I can't lose anyone else," Kakashi admitted quietly. "Not again. If you guys can help, from your spot in the pure world, please. Please help. I can't lose anyone anymore."
* * *​

"Is the lock down over?" Hisako asked, looking up from her spot on the bed.

"Not yet, Honey," standing in the bed frame was Hisako's mother, Yamada Sata. Sata, just by looking at her, you could see that Hisako had taken a great deal after her mother in looks, the only exception being the eyes, Sata's green contrasted Hisako's black. "Local ANBU are still combing the city for Root."

"I still can't believe something like that even existed," Hisako said, shaking her head. "Why would Konoha even need something like Root? We have ANBU."

"Well," Sata began, walking into the room and sitting down. "I believe it was said that Danzo could protect Konoha with greater ability if he had a division of Shinobi that answered only to him. The Hokage thought he could trust him."

"Yeah, that didn't blow up in his face at all," Hisako said with a frown. "No disrespect to the Hokage, but it needs to be said."

"Just don't say that out in public," Sata insisted with a worried look. "It could be misconstrued as inciting insurrection and that is the last thing we need right now."

"I won't, Mom," Hisako said. "So, I'm going to spend my A-rank money getting an apartment. As soon as the lock down is over, I'm moving out."

"My little girl is all grown up," Sata said with a sad smile on her face. "I'm so proud of you. We can go apartment shopping together."

"And then I can start inviting my team over and we can talk, maybe play games…" Hisako started smiling. "Mom, can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," Sata replied brightly.

"There's this boy," Hisako started. "A boy I really, really like. He's been my friend for years and we're on the same Genin team but I don't think I really know him at all."

"How so?" Sata asked.

"We spar all the time on Taijutsu, and he's really good," Hisako said, sitting up. "And he's a really good listener, but I don't know how to get him to open up and talk to me."

Sata hummed. "Well, you can't ask a boy about his feelings. Instead, ask him about his interests."

"His interests," Hisako repeated, blinking. "Why can't I just ask him to open up and share his feelings? You know, that's the important part."

"Oh honey," Sata began, amused. "He's a boy. If you try to get him to talk about his feelings before he's ready, his mind will just go blank. Instead, ask him about his interests and then carry the conversation from there. When he's ready to share, he'll share."

"Okay then," Hisako replied. "I guess I can work with that. I don't really know what his interests are. He doesn't really talk a lot."

"Then ask him," Sata encouraged. "That's the best way to find out how a man is feeling, if he wants to share. If he wants to share, then he'll share. If he doesn't, then there's no point in pressing any more. Unless you want to make him angry."

"Can I ask him if he likes me?" Hisako asked.

Sata laughed. "Only if you aren't afraid of rejection."

"So he's just going to reject me if I ask directly," Hisako replied with a frown.

"Not necessarily," Sata shrugged. "He might not know if he likes you or not. Or if he is, he's too nervous to just come out and say it. Or he might just like you back and reciprocate right there. So...be ready for anything is what I'm trying to say."

"Oh, okay," Hisako replied. "What do I need to do to get him to like me right now?"

"Be your best self," Sata answered. "And if he doesn't like you, then it was never meant to be. Also, don't be something you're not. If you do, he'll never like you, only the person you pretended to be."

"But what if he doesn't like me?" Hisako asked, laying back on her bed, and grabbing a pillow to groan into. "There's no way he does. He hasn't really tried to ask me out like some of the other boys in the Academy did. So maybe I'm just pining in the wind!"

"Well, he might not have liked you then and that might change as he grows older," Sata explained, shrugging. "Crushes like this can be so frustrating, huh?"

"You have no idea," Hisako said, spreading her arms wide, her pillow still clutched tightly in her hand. "Maybe if I ask him what he's thinking? He sometimes just gets this faraway look on his face and he disappears into his own little world."

"Your father always tells me nothing when I ask," Sata replied with a grin.

"Why doesn't he ever tell you?" Hisako asked, looking really concerned. "Is he just mad all the time?"

"No," Sata shook her head. "I used to think so. Before we were married, I'd get so terrified that I had done something to upset him because he'd refuse to open up. But I learned that it's usually because he's daydreaming and when I ask him that, he snaps out of it and can't remember what he was thinking about."

"Oh," Hisako blinked, laying back down. "Well, that's a relief. But Daisuke-kun!"

"You can't force love," Sata said with a shrug. "He might even like you, but want to focus on his career and not want a relationship right now. You can't force it."

Hisako pressed the pillow to her face and groaned again. "But I have to have him!"

"I'm sorry you're frustrated," Sata replied kindly. "If you want my advice, talk about his interests and use that to find out what kind of person he is. But don't ever press him. If he closes off, it's okay. There's other times. Trust me."

"Okay," Hisako sighed. "Thanks, Mom."

"Besides," Sata continued with a shrug. "For all you know, he might not be someone you want to be anything other than complete strangers with."

Hisako grunted in annoyance. "Thanks, Mom."

* * *
The store doors opened and Nichiren walked inside the grocery store with a relieved sigh. "Never thought I'd be happy to see this place again."

"Glad that the lock down ended," Nichiren's father, Nakamura Seihachi muttered. "Nichiren, get to the back room, we need to make sure that rats didn't get into anything."

"Especially not the beef," Nakamura Amaya added, shuddering. "That would just be the capstone to this terrible week."

Of course, it was not hard to be pessimistic. An armed insurrection causing a lock down on Konoha made things really tense. Even as the family walked past some of their regular customers, the Ichiraku's, the Yamanaka's, they could feel the anxiety and paranoia in the air like a cloud of smog that blocked out the sun.

"You'll need to get it done fast," Seihachi added. "You need to be at your training meet in a couple hours."

"Yeah, Dad!" Nichiren replied, heading over to the door behind the counter labeled 'staff only'.

The Nakamura store was small, but located in a key location that got a lot of traffic during the day near town square. They prided themselves on their constant supply of fresh meat and vegetables, which came from two large farms owned by Nichiren's uncle outside the village walls. They were hoping to one day purchase the store next door, which was an antique store with no good items for sale so they could expand the store to twice the size.

Nichiren opened the door and walked inside.

He came to a hall. On the right was the restroom, to the left was his parents office and break room. Straight ahead as the store room, which had rows and rows of metal shelves and a large refrigerator to keep the perishables fresh.

However, Nichiren could see that there was a lot of mess directly ahead.

Shelves had been knocked over and product had spilled all over the floor. Nichiren's blood ran cold as he rushed forward and beheld the most abhorrent sight a business man could possibly see; all of his product had been destroyed.

Immediately, large animal heads poked up over the wreckage and Nichiren froze on the spot.

Rats.

Giant rats.

Nichiren looked around and saw what had happened.

The steel safe filled with soldier pills had been chewed into and the crumbs were all over the concrete.

Aw come on! Nichiren thought, immediately drawing a kunai.

The rats started to shriek and Nichiren realized there were a lot more of them than there were of him, and they were larger than most house cats. They charged him and Nichiren threw his kunai, sticking one rat in the head while the rest charged after him.

Running back down the hall, Nichiren reached down to his waist for the present Kakashi gave him for completing his thirtieth consecutive day of training. A spool of Ninja wire.

Nichiren had always been gifted with Ninja wire, even back in the academy. He just had a head for how the wire could wrap around every possible vantage point they could and conduct jutsu like lightning or fire. But they could easily be just as dangerous weapons on their own. Like when it turned into a whirling cyclone of steel floss.

The rats chased after him, but quickly saw when the first couple wound up getting blended into a rat smoothie.

With a smirk, his glasses shined in a glare of light and he began walking forward, lashing out with his wire, chopping, cutting and dismembering the decidedly outmatched rodents, who were making a retreat back to the steel safe they had originally come through and couldn't fit in.

Some realized that it was hopeless and turned to leap at him, causing Nichiren to be covered in bloody rat paste as their remains turned to mush.

When at last, the deed was done, Nichiren wound the wire back up. He felt like he was standing just a bit taller after his accomplishment. He took a breath and let it out.

The sound of chewing caused him to whirl around.

The sound had come from a man. He was absurdly tall, almost two meters. Brown hair that was parted at the side, and a trimmed brown beard. Over his eyes he wore black, square glasses that were reflecting a nonexistent glare. He was wearing a white lab coat over a black, button up shirt and slacks, a crimson necktie shining in the light above them. In his hands was a bag of popcorn, and he was tossing bits of it into his mouth.

"Not bad," He with a slow nod. "This encounter wasn't meant for you, but not bad. That wire's disgusting."

"Who are you?" Nichiren asked in confusion.

"A hostile foreign infiltrator," The man replied nonchalantly. "You?"

"A...what?" Nichiren became completely confused. Then his brain processed what he just heard, and got angry. "You're a what?"

"A guy who plants dangerous beasties in random places for entertainment," He replied with a shrug. "Now answer my question. Who are you?"

"Nakamura Nichiren," Nichiren said, slowly backing toward the entrance.

"Wait, is Nakamura your family name or your given name?" The intruder asked, scratching his head in irritation. "This weeaboo stuff always confuses me."

"Weea-what?" Nichiren asked, even more confused. "Nakamura's my family name? I'm so confused."

"You and me both," He replied. "Anyway, I'll probably see you later when it's time to end the world. Toodles!"

Nichiren blinked and he disappeared.

"Wh-what?" Nichiren blinked.

Then he ran down the hall, shouting as loud as he could. "Mom, Rats got into the soldier pills! We're going to have to replace the whole stock and I need to report something immediately!"

"We're going to have to what?" His Mom shouted at the top of her lungs as Nichiren bolted out of the store doors.

As he ran to the Academy, to Headquarters, he slowly began to realize something.

That man, whoever he wasn't, was speaking in some kind of code. Not a cipher, or rhymes, but something with it's own set of rules...as if it were a completely different language.

And Nichiren understood him perfectly.

* * *
"Come back soon, Naruto," Ayame said with a happy smile. "It's always great having you!"

"Thanks, Ayame!" Naruto replied, walking out of the ramen stand with a wave, having only eaten a single bowl of ramen there.

Naruto felt oddly nervous, even at Ichiraku ramen, the closest thing he had to a home away from home.

The Academy had let out for the day, the instructors acting like nothing had happened, but he noticed that a couple of them were missing, including Mizuki for some reason.

He just had a bowl of ramen, he didn't know why he should be nervous. Things had settled. The ANBU that took him to the emergency bunker, Rabbit, said things were calm now. But he still felt like there was some danger close by that he needed to make sure he avoided at all costs.

"Well, if it isn't Naruto!"

Naruto looked up, to the table of some fancy restaurant and there sat the Man in Green. He hadn't seen him since the orphanage days, one of the few nice people he had ever met.

The Man in Green waved, and beckoned him over.

"Hey!" Naruto said, waving and coming over. "Nice to see you!"

"You've grown so much since I last saw you," The man in green said, giving a partial bow in his chair, which Naruto returned. "Why don't you have a seat, I'll treat you to supper."

"Oh, I already ate," Naruto replied, rubbing the back of his head with an embarrassed grin.

"Are you sure you aren't hungry?" The Man asked with a polite smile.

It was then that Naruto's stomach grumbled. In his hurry to leave the stand, he realized that yes, he was still hungry.

"I recommend the teriyaki pork," The man said.

"Uh, thanks," Naruto replied, sitting across from the man. "Hey, uh...I don't remember your name."

"Call me Satoshi," The man introduced himself. "I don't believe I did introduce myself all those years ago. My apologies."

"It's fine," Naruto waved it off. "I'm surprised to see you again. What are you doing here?"

"Well, I'm keeping an eye on someone," Satoshi replied, his smile fading somewhat. "But it appears that person...behaved themselves. Reasonably so. Then again, it's not like I can do much besides look disapprovingly if he does something. So, how have you been?"

"I've been okay, moved out of the orphanage," Naruto replied with a nod. "And I finally learned how to do the Bunshin Jutsu! So I'm happy!"

"That's wonderful, great job," Satoshi replied with a grin. "And! And you moved out of the orphanage. I knew someone would be smart enough to adopt you. Well done!"

Naruto's grin faltered. "Uh, well, uh...not exactly."

Satoshi blinked. "I see. That...is unfortunate if the people in the village cannot see value when it is staring them in the face."

"Yeah, you're telling me," Naruto said. "So what if Daisuke graduated early, I'm just as good a ninja as him, and I'm not even out of the academy yet!"

Satoshi got this strange ghost of a smirk on his face that disappeared when Naruto looked at him. "Is that so? Are you two still friends? I hope so."

"Yeah, we're friends," Naruto said, slowly nodding. "Just, you know, he's got Ninja stuff to do and I got the Academy. I think we'll spend a lot more time together when we're both Ninja."

Satoshi slowly started to nod. "Oh I see. That makes sense. Still, is Shimoda-kun the only friend you have? Certainly no one else can be that...blind."

"Well, there's Iruka-sensei," Naruto replied, pondering.

The waiter came and took their orders. Naruto looked at the menu and saw that, yes, they did offer ramen. "I'll take an extra large Miso Chasu Ramen, please!"

The waiter blinked, seeing Naruto's cheek markings. "I'm sorry, but-"

"And I'll have the same," Satoshi replied, his eyes lightly flashing for just a moment.

"Very good, I'll have it right out for you both," The waiter replied, suddenly immediately cheerful. He took both menus and went right back into the restaurant with a spring in his step.

Naruto looked pensive. "I thought he was going to throw me out."

"I'm glad he rethought that decision," Satoshi replied with a smile. "Still...that is concerning. For people to try to shun you like this...I hope you have protection."

"Eh, the old man has ANBU watching over me," Naruto answered with a nonchalant shrug.

"Oh, that's good. Do you speak with them often?" Satoshi asked.

Naruto got quiet again. "...not really."

Satoshi looked down. "Well. I think I have a solution."

"You do?" Naruto asked, immediately perking up.

"What if I told you there was a jutsu you could perform that would take you to a place where everyone would like you?" Satoshi asked hypothetically. "Where you could get a long with everyone?"

"A jutsu like that," Naruto asked, blinking and folding his arms in disbelief. "Really. What's it called?"

"The summoning jutsu," Satoshi replied. "If you do it without a summoning contract, it teleports you to the realm of the summon animal that you match the best with."

"Oh really?" Naruto asked, still doubtful. "Summon animals? What's the catch?"

"It can be quite dangerous," Satoshi replied. "Well, only if you're weak on your own merits. The summon clans don't take kindly to leeches...not even the leech clan."

"Well, I'm not weak," Naruto said with a grin. "So this should be easy!"

"I agree," Satoshi replied, slowly nodding. "You teleport there, impress their leader and they give you a scroll that lets you call on them whenever you want. Never again, will you be around people that don't like you."

Naruto slowly nodded, adopting a smile. "That...actually sounds really good. Do you have a summon clan?"

"I do," Satoshi replied.

"What is it?" Naruto pressed.

"Dolphins." At Naruto's confused expression, Satoshi elaborated. "They're a creature that lives out in the ocean. Very playful, smile all the time. Love to help."

"Like you," Naruto pointed out, pleased with his observation.

"Exactly like me," Satoshi replied, slowly nodding.

"So, can you teach me the jutsu?" Naruto asked, an eager look on his face, leaning forward.

Satoshi hummed. "No."

"No?" Naruto asked, sounding offended. "No? Why not?"

"Because I feel like just telling you would just cheapen it for you," Satoshi replied. "You're a good ninja, after all. You don't need me to teach you when you can find out for yourself."

"How do I find out?" Naruto asked, leaning in.

"In the Academy Library," Satoshi started. "On the fourth floor, on shelf directly across from the stairs is a scroll. This scroll is dark green, darker than my robes here. If you can get there, past the guards of each section of the library and pull the scroll out, you deserve that jutsu."

"I'll do it," Naruto said, sitting straight up. There was a fire in his eyes, a fire that demanded adventure and risk.

It was determination.

"It might be hard," Satoshi cautioned, an amused smile crossing his face. "But I believe you can accomplish hard things."

"Yeah!" Naruto nodded rapidly, turning to bolt. "See you, Satoshi-san!"

"Wait, wait, wait," Satoshi stopped him. "Don't you want your ramen?"

"Oh." Naruto froze with an embarrassed expression on his face. "Heh, right. Yeah, Ramen sounds pretty good."

"Ramen is always good."
* * *​


Author's Note: Well, here's an interlude. First one in a while, chapter 10. Got to say, I'm happy with how it turned out, because I was able to spend some time away from the immediate happenings of the chapter and cut to the larger narrative. Keep in mind, everything you have read was in the story since I posted it years ago. This is draft 1 content that I'm executing significantly better.

Well, actually Jashin is like previous draft content, but I like his character so much, I had to keep him.

Anyway, your thoughts would be greatly appreciated. The wait between chapters has actually done me a world of good, thank you for your patience.

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Fulcon's Notes: Thinking back and looking ahead.
Thinking back and looking ahead.

---

I want to type something about the fic. Updates have been slow to non-existant because, once my monetization was gone, I felt like I was finally able to take a much needed vacation from writing. My batteries are slowly recharging, and that means updates down the line.

In Act 2, I had a lot of things set up for Daisuke to wreck the world. But then Daisuke got over his issues and he rejoined Konoha in the biggest climactic let down of the century. I kind of want to go over why I think things happened that way.

Also, apologies if you guys are getting tired of me being endlessly self-critical. I'm trying to piece things together because there's stuff I need to figure out, so these are my thoughts.

---

Reason 1: Plans without synergy

The big conceit of act 2 was that I wanted Daisuke to become the bad guy. In order for Act 2 to work, Daisuke had to be the antagonist.

The reason for this was simple; Daisuke was too powerful. He had a Green Lantern Ring without any drawbacks. I knew, even back when I was first writing this fic, that this was how it was going to have to be. And it was going to be fine because Naruto would become the hero and bring Daisuke back down, convince him to stay and trigger the grand reveal of Act 2's finale. Act 2 was planned and built with Daisuke being a background force spending almost all of his time working on getting home. Act 2 was meant to have Daisuke become the BBEG (from Konoha's perspective) and force Naruto on the start of his heroes journey.

Well, if you were around before the first round of rewrites, you know how this turned out. It...was bad. Really, really bad. I tried to rush through things because I was letting my critics get to me. I was hoping to address all their complaints and finally finish act 1 (which I was beyond tired of) so I could get to the point of it all.

Now, looking back on it, I was not ready to write a shift this drastic. I was neither competent enough, nor emotionally resilient enough, to write it. I was hoping to examine every potential failing of a gamer fic. Act 1 was how min-maxing can screw you over. Act 2 was how a homesick SI would do everything in his power (even though he was tilting at windmills with that) to return home. Act 3 was how the SI would react to someone else like him trying to destroy everything he cared about.

I wanted to rock the heavens of SI-dome. I wanted to rip the whole concept apart and lay bare it's concepts for the world to see and condescend down with me. What happened was that my pride brought about my downfall. I was not nearly good enough, not nearly patient enough, not nearly wise enough, attempt a deconstruction on that scale.

I cannot tell you how much I loathe my first attempt at this fic for this exact reason.

However, when I started writing Act 2, Daisuke began taking more and more of a front seat until, well, I fixed my crap. Daisuke letting go was me letting go and then...well, we come to the next part.

Reason 2: Daisuke was weak.

Daisuke, in a way, is a deconstruction of an SI. At least, in the first draft. At the time of writing, I was a lazy, good for nothing person whose only redeeming attribute was that he could write moderately well. So Daisuke...embodies that. He was lazy. He had no problem solving ability, or even initiative (hello, Charisma stat!) and he had an uncanny ability to get people to like him for no reason. The only reason Daisuke was ever a good Ninja was because of the Game System. If he didn't have the game system, its likely that he never would've even considered being a Ninja and instead would've wound up doing...something. I don't know what. But he wouldn't be a Ninja. Too much dedication, too much risk of dying. Too much not being godlike.

Now take someone like this, someone who mostly does what he's told, whose main defense mechanism is to shut people away, and give him aspirations to change the world?

You know what happens?

He gives up and goes back to whats comfortable.

Let me reiterate.

He gives up.

This was the other reason why Daisuke had to be consigned to be a background character. I knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that if I focused on him for any length of time, my Daisuke as Villain paradigm would fall apart so fast I wouldn't have a fic. Its why or rather, how, Daisuke got over his stuff. Daisuke was pulled away from his support structures and soon crumbled and then wound up thinking that changing the world isn't all that good of a goal simply because he doesn't want to be in charge. He doesn't want to be in charge because he didn't have the will to actually see his designs for the world brought to fruition, didn't want to be blamed for the collateral damage his revolution would cause, didn't want to be at fault if he wound up making things worse.

Shimoda Daisuke was weak. Weak enough that a single heart to heart at the end of Act 2 would've snapped him out of villain-hood. Weak enough that he couldn't carry a story without his social issues burdening him.

Reason 3: Mitarashi Anko

Listen, the only reason Daisuke got married to Anko instead of Ino was because Daisuke is an adult in the center. A man-child, but a man. He's an adult and wants adult things from his relationships; and he saw Ino as a child. That sent all kinds of signals to me that it was wrong on every level imaginable so I...cheated. Anko was psychologically vulnerable and willing enough to give Daisuke what he needed when he really needed that emotional closeness after having spent so much time independent and walled off. Luckily for her, Daisuke was fairly benign and I would like to think they'd make a good match up. Cringe-y dialogue, sure, especially at the start (which I maintain was because they were trying to find their footing and thus was only natural; they just had no shame because there was nothing to be ashamed or bashful of - they were married for pete's sake), but a good matchup.

But ultimately; it came down to this. Daisuke wanted sex and Anko was the best match up that didn't send his conscience into a death spiral. Anko needed emotional connection and Daisuke came offering it on levels she'd never experienced before. Then you add in Ninshu and the fact that they are actually fairly compatible and you have a surprising recipe for a completely unnatural but happy and long-lasting marriage.

At least, I certainly hope so.

The main reason this was so jarring was because Hisako and Ino had much, much more screen time and Anko didn't have much characterization before suddenly being Daisuke's wife. This draft is already fixing that by setting them up early and quickly. If Hisako and Ino want to prove to Daisuke that they can be his...concubines (I don't like that word), they'll need to prove that they're adult enough to handle an adult relationship.

...come to think of it, why am I putting a harem in this fic when I find that concept so distasteful? Actually, why do I find that concept so distasteful? Mathematically, it's best for humanities gene pool. Questions for later.

Reason 4: Jashin and Shinigami.

When I abandoned the Daisuke as Villain paradigm (something I still wonder if I should've), I needed a conflict that could contend with Daisuke being a god. Enter Jashin and Shinigami. Since the three were immortal, they were always going to be at a constant stalemate. There was no winning in their conflict. Jashin decided that since Daisuke was wrecking the Tobi-Madara-Kaguya bomb he'd been poking and prodding for centuries, that he'd wreck Konoha by becoming Naruto's surrogate mentor. Honestly, I like these two, but some people mentioned that they didn't like them because they didn't see how a decisive victory was possible; I realized that, well, that was the point. When you get past a certain point, the world becomes a game and then the only thing to do when someone wins is to set up another game.

...wait, I think I might've stumbled upon why they've stuck around in the new draft. Their appearance having been sped up because I realized that a reincarnate person would be of great, almost obsessive, interest to the Shinigami and Jashin would then follow suit because it's something new and their game has hit a stalemate (their game being kind of like real world monopoly, Jashin being the only one really playing and Shinigami exclusively being the banker). So they're just waiting for things to explode and suddenly, there's the child of prophecy and...a reincarnated person slaved to a game system that warps how the world is supposed to run.

Seriously, if it weren't for Daisuke, Jashin was perfectly fine just watching Naruto plod along per canon with a smile on his face and a bucket of popcorn. But then Daisuke's very existence changed things and arguably made them worse.

Actually, making things worse somehow is a thing for a lot of my SI's. Wonder why that is?

---

Thank you for accompanying me on my ramblings on the story. I still hope that one day I'll be able to finish this thing so we can all read it and enjoy it.

Until the next time.

~Fulcon
 
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Chapter 11: Team 9
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *
Fuinjutsu 48 / 100.

Ranged Weapons 33 / 100.

As far as armed insurrections go, this one stunk. I was expecting to be bouncing from safe house to safe house while Anko ran herself ragged trying to keep me safe, but it was over in about a day and a half.

I'm offended by how little attention I was given.

Not from Anko, she was great, but Danzo couldn't have been bothered to sneak a few more agents my way? Come on, man.

It didn't take long for everything to go back to normal. Konoha's a tough city and it'll take more than crazy super soldiers with magic to leave anything short of a minor scar. That much was evident from the heavy and swift construction. In particular, team's three and four were assisting with the repair of some of the taller buildings in the Village, using tree-walking to walk up walls in lieu of any form of scaffolding to help repair shattered window frames.

As far as D-ranks go, it was a pretty good one. Wouldn't mind a mission like it.

I was on my way to the Hokage's office for an emergency meeting. Anko followed behind me like a welcome shadow. Not entirely sure what it was, but thinking she was back there made me smile. It'd make me happier if she was beside me but that'll have to wait until after her mission is over, if she even wanted to hang out with me anymore.

Up the stairs, past the academy, where I caught sight of Naruto's class walking down the hall to what I assume was Taijutsu practice in a line. Catching the backs of Ino, Hinata and of course, Naruto was kind of...surreal but hey. It's kind of cool.

Wish I watched more of the anime, though by the time Shippuden had finally made its way to an English dub, I had grown very sick of it.

Came to the landing for the office, where the Secretary waited, typing away at her typewriter, a device which made me blink. Both because the world I lived in was such a schizoid mess that I was still trying to figure out where we were on the Civilization Tech Tree, and because I had only seen a typewriter once before.

In my old life.

Yeah.

I walked up to the desk. The secretary was a red number with thin-framed glasses...the ring of a kunai strapped under her chair gave her away as ANBU. She was cute, I guess, but redheads never really did it for me. "Shimoda Daisuke, here to meet the Hokage?"

She looked up at me without so much as changing her expression. "Go ahead, he's expecting you."

As we passed, I heard the secretary acknowledge my bodyguard.

Charisma Check Passed: 7 / 5.

With barely concealed venom? "Anko."

"Miyoshi," Anko replied politely, yet stiffly.

Wonder if I can ask about that later without seeming nosy?

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

Eh, if I do it delicately, sure.

We walked up the stair and I knocked on the door.

"Enter."

Walked inside and there was...everyone. Kakashi, Hisako and Nichiren. Are we getting a C-rank mission?

I greeted the Hokage with a bow. "Hokage-sama. Everyone."

"Shimoda-kun," The Hokage said. "Mitarashi-san. I'm glad everyone got here in a timely manner."

"Hokage-sama," Anko bowed.

"Now, the reason I called you all here is because Nakamura-kun reported a sighting," The Hokage began.

"Of?" I asked, feeling very out of the loop.

"The man who brought you to Konoha," Hiruzen explained, puffing his pipe.

I was thunderstruck.

"A man two-meters tall," he continued keeping an intent gaze on my expression. "Neatly groomed brown hair and glasses reflecting a sun-glare no matter the angle or the lighting level. Wearing a white lab-coat with a black button up shirt and crimson neck-tie. Does that ring any bells?"

My eyes were wide and I think I was hyperventilating. Because he sounded familiar alright, but I couldn't remember a thing about him. "...no, Hokage-sama. He seems familiar, but beyond being very angry for some reason, I can't tell you why. I have no memory of him, that's the truth."

The Hokage hummed, his hat casting a dark shadow across his features.

"I believe him," Hisako immediately piped up. "I've known him for years, I know when he's lying. He's not."

"Yamada-chan, if you'd please hold your comments until I have finished with my questions?" The Hokage asked with a grandfatherly smile. At her nod and bow, he shifted his 'Gaze of the Fire Shadow' back onto me. "Nakamura-kun, if you'd quote, word for word, what he said?"

Nichiren then quoted back to me, in heavily accented but still audibly correct English 'I'm a hostile foreign infiltrator' and 'I'll be back when its time to end the world', which both increased my rage and forced my throat shut.

English.

English in Naruto.

Whoever you are? What ever you did to piss me off this much? I swear, even if I have to carve a bloody swathe through the streets of Konoha and burn down the entire Land of Fire, I will find you and kill you.

"Now, correct me if I'm wrong, but that's the same code that you get your premonitions, is it not?" The Hokage asked neutrally.

I gulped down the bile that had filled the back of my throat. "Yes sir."

The Hokage hummed, tapping his pipe and looking down in thought. "Shimoda Daisuke, are you loyal to Konoha?"

I am not. It is just the village I was dumped in to live with this hellish world. But… "No sir. But I am loyal to my friends and they're all in Konoha, and that's always been good enough for me."

Charisma Check Failure: 7 / 10.

Speech Check Failure: 36 / 85.

SCREW YOU GAME I WILL HUNT DOWN WHOEVER WROTE YOUR DESIGN DOCUMENT AND FORCE FEED HIM HIS OWN-

"Look, you have to believe me," I quickly cut in, sputtering as many arguments and defenses as I could think of out of my mouth. "I swear, I am not a sleeper agent or a spy or anything. Hokage-sama-"

"Shimoda-kun," Hiruzen held up a hand to stop me. He leaned backward in his chair, the squeak of which may as well have been the sound of a cannon going off for how tense the room was. He turned to Hisako. "Yamada-chan, you have known him the longest. Can we trust him?"

She gulped, her gaze rapidly switching between me and Hiruzen. "Yes, Hokage-sama. We can trust him. I have known him since we were in the Academy. After he graduated, he'd always come find me during lunch so we could spar or compare notes or talk. Someone who wasn't loyal wouldn't do that."

...thank you. Thank you so, so much, Hisako. I will never forget this.

"Nakamura-kun?" The Hokage asked.

"He figured out the bell test and did everything he could to help us pass," Nichiren said, taking his glasses off. "Even me. When he learned I cheated, he didn't stop trying to help me. He and Hisako-chan both believed in me when I didn't believe in myself. I admit I don't know him that well. But the man, the one in the white lab coat? He said he planted 'magical beasties' in random places for entertainment. That sounds an awful lot like that bird-monster in the House. And if he's trying to kill Daisuke, as in actually kill him, then I can't see how they'd be working together."

Wow.

...I'm speechless.

"Hatake-san?"

"Daisuke is, at his heart, an introvert," Kakashi started levelly. "He is a genius who prefers to be on his own most days. In Konoha, we've had a history of introverted geniuses turning into monsters. But with Daisuke? From what I've seen, how helpful he tries to be and how considerate he is in general? I think he is the exception."

Kakashi's visible eye narrowed in the Hokage's direction. "I am willing to stake my life on him being completely trustworthy."

Oh my gosh.

I...thank you, Sensei. I won't let you down.

My team is saving my life in a very literal way right now. I will return the favor as often as needed.

"And Mitarashi-san?" The Hokage looked past me to my bodyguard.

"I haven't known him very long," Anko said. "But I haven't seen him do anything suspicious and he's great company. So...I'll cast my vote for him."

Thank you so much.

The Hokage sighed, and puffed his pipe. After what felt like an eternity, he spoke. "Shimoda-kun, I thank you for your honesty today. An admission like the one you made might have gotten you killed in other circles. Circles that I am working to close. I swear an oath to you, today, that whoever this is will die."

"Hokage-sama," I cut in.

"Yes?"

"He's my mark, sir," I said. "I will be the one to kill him."

Hiruzen smirked. "And Konoha will support you. Now, final question."

I stiffened.

"A man in a green kimono came to see you several years ago," Hiruzen began. "Do you know who he is?"

Who is he…? Oh. That guy. I remember those red eyes. "I don't. I only know that he scared me."

"He scared you?" Hiruzen asked, his eyebrows raising up.

"He was very creepy," I replied. "Naruto seemed to like him, though."

...wait, where is Naruto? Oh, right. He's in class.

"I will have to speak to him once the Academy gets out," Hiruzen said. "Now what is on the docket for Team 13?"

"We were going to do some Taijutsu training by the Memorial stone," Kakashi replied easily, shrugging his arms like he was the epitome of chill.

"Excellent. Shimoda, Yamada and Nakamura? If you'd wait outside while I spoke with Hatake and Mitarashi?"

"Uh…" Anko looked really hesitant and I turned to leave.

"I assure you he will be safe in the lobby," Hiruzen cut her off with an amused smile. "It is well guarded."

"If you say so, Hokage-sama," Anko didn't look convinced, giving me a wave goodbye with a smile that was tinged with worry.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

Worry born of more than just failing a mission and losing a giant stream of income. That's...that makes me happy. I mean, I don't want her to worry, but her worrying is a sign that she actually cares so maybe we could keep hanging out after her mission is done?

We walked down the stairs, shutting the door behind us. No one spoke as we took seats up against the wall. The only sound was the typewriter clacking.

Nichiren was the one to finally break the silence. "So that guy helped a bunch of rats get into our stock of soldier pills."

"Wait, seriously?" I asked, turning to face him.

"Those things must've been massive," Hisako said. Then she paled and shivered in disgust.

"Yeah, they were like this big," Nichiren continued, giving an approximation of their size with his hands. "And I'm pretty sure they would've bit through my arm if I touched them."

"You know, rats are the only animal I know of that can develop a craving for human blood," I mused, stroking my chin in thought. You know, in my old world, with that being true, I'm surprised that rats weren't the patron animal of Vampires.

...that idea is mine. I'm taking it and I'm going to write a book about vampires that transformed into rats instead of bats.

"I did not know that," Nichiren said, his face paling.

"I didn't need to know that," Hisako added, her face twisting with revulsion.

"Anyway, how'd you kill them?" I asked, smiling with interest.

Nichiren strung up some ninja wire between his fingers.

"Nice." I nodded approvingly.

"I hope you diced them," Hisako added with a vicious gleam in her eyes that...did interesting things to my insides.

"By the time I was done? They were unrecognizable," Nichiren replied with a proud look in his eyes. "The guy even complimented my wire work, which...I'm not sure how I feel about."

I shrugged. "A compliment is a compliment."

After that, we fell to silence. Hisako looked like she wanted to say something, but I think she's...trying to become accustomed to silence? We can't talk on stealth missions, so that's a good habit to get into.

After a few minutes of waiting, the receptionist spoke. "You know that body guard of yours is a snake."

I blinked. I wasn't about to let someone talk badly of Anko. Not after today. "She's a pretty snake."

She glared at me. "I'm being serious."

"And it's really none of my business," I replied diplomatically.

Speech Check Success: 36 / 30.

She meant to continue, but Anko coming down the stairs stopped her, and she went back to typing. Anko was wearing a really satisfied smile on her face. "Hey, we're ready to go."

"Anko's accompanying us to keep an eye on Daisuke-kun," Kakashi said with an eye-smile. "I could keep you all in line by myself, but two heads are better than one."

"Besides, Daisuke can be a real handful," Anko added with a mischievous wink. "Can't you?"

"I'm the worst," I admitted with a smile.

Anko chortled as we all stood up to leave. Hisako glared at her before sharply turning away, walking forward faster than was strictly necessary.

What's her problem?

Charisma Check Failure: 7 / 8.

...you always show up at the worst times, game.
* * *​

Training was, well, training. Entirely for my teammates benefit, something I was completely okay with. Especially now. Me, I just needed to find a few good books and I'd get better that way.

Speaking of training, it appears that Nichiren really just needed a break. In the past few days, during the lock down, it appears that everything he'd been taught had some time to settle in his brain. His physical conditioning was still, well, not great, but his proficiency took a great leap forward!

He wasn't having spacing issues anymore, at least.

Like now, he just jumped backward to avoid a leg-sweep I purposely did slowly so he'd actually be able to dodge. Then he came in while my back was turned to throw a punch to the back of my head.

Progress!

I rolled forward to get away from the fist and spun around as I got to my feet, reasserting my stance. Nichiren was breathing heavily, his black hair stained with sweat.

During training, I tried to actively avoid sliding around like a greased Pikachu. Most enemies won't fight like me so in the name of effectiveness, I fought like anyone else. Honestly, it was a good exercise in restraint though sometimes it chafed.

Nichiren charged forward, throwing two light kicks aimed at my shoulder and chest. I ducked beneath his leg and grabbed it, pulling him off of his feet. His cry of astonishment rapidly turned to one of fear as I slammed him into the ground.

"Daisuke is the winner!" Kakashi called neutrally.

Down chest-first on the ground, Nichiren groaned in frustration. He adjusted his glasses and took my offered hand to stand up. "What'd I do wrong this time?"

I shrugged. "That was really just me being faster and stronger than you, not necessarily any mistake you made."

"Aw," Nichiren frowned, folding his arms in annoyance.

You know, if I don't find a way to increase my strength score, he's going to pass me soon. 4 Strength is below average and the way he's working?

"Hey, you're getting the hang of it," Hisako said with a supportive smile. "Seriously, you just need to get properly conditioned and you'll be a terror!"

"Thanks," Nichiren replied.

"Yeah, after all the progress you've made, you aren't allowed to be a downer," I said with a smirk.

Nichiren scoffed but shook his head with a bemused smile.

"KAKASHI!"

I looked over and...yeah. Figures he'd show up eventually.

Maito Gai! Haven't seen him since Team's were assigned, and he was carrying his own in tow. I recognized Neji, Tenten and Lee immediately and they looked indifferent, exasperated and enthusiastic, respectively. I was glad they seemed healthy. No disaster mission to take either of Neji's eyes, for instance.

Watching from her spot beneath the shade of a tree, Anko looked amused.

"It's good to see you, my eternal rival!" Gai beamed at Kakashi-sensei. "Where've you been? Heard you had a rough mission!"

"Oh, I've been keeping busy," Kakashi replied with an eye-smile. "Lot of paperwork, you know how that is."

"Well, if you've been cooped up doing paperwork that must mean you're ready to stretch your legs!" Gai shouted. Then he pointed directly in the center of Kakashi's mask. "I challenge you!"

Kakashi sighed. "Gai…"

"You're in the lead at Forty Nine since you won that Rock-Paper-Scissors game," Gai stated, fist clenched dramatically before him like he were swearing vengeance upon his mortal enemy. "And I am here to even the score!"

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 6.

Rivalries are actually quite common in Konoha. In the latest census I read, nearly 45% of the Village's citizenry, civilian and Shinobi, had a rival. Of the split, 63% of rivalries were Ninja. Just part of the culture. Reading!

Seemed fun, but not my cup of tea.

"Gai, can we do this later?" Kakashi asked, gesturing to us. "We're in the middle of training."

Gai blinked owlishly. Then he grinned. "Then I've got it! It'll be my students vs yours! Three Taijutsu matches! One of your students against one of my students! The Sensei with the most wins at the end wins the challenge! That way we can all get training in and we'll know who the better Sensei is!"

Kakashi blinked and sighed. "You have a good point. Alright, I accept."

Quest Added: Youthful Competition!

Watch your teammates compete: (0 / 2).

Win your match.

I'm down!

"Yosh!" Gai cried. He pointed. "Let's go!"

"Team?" Kakashi asked, looking at us...well, looking at me. "Don't kill them."

Right. No Megaton Punch.

"Ohohohoho!" Gai laughed. "You're confident! This is going to be amazing and shall bask us in the fires of youth!"

...youth.

Right.

We all walked down to a small Taijutsu arena that had been built into the training area, just a dirt-pit circled by a stone border. We took our seats opposite each other, respectfully.

"Alright, Kakashi! Call your first student." Gai enthusiastically gave a thumbs up, his teeth blinding me...wait, no. Teeth don't normally shine like that, how is he doing that?

Perception Check Failure: 7 / 8.

Shut up, game.

"Hisako? You're up," Kakashi instructed.

"Yes, Sensei," Hisako replied, standing up and walking into the center of the ring.

"Lee!" Gai called and his mini-clone stood up in a smooth motion.

"Yosh!" Lee chirped cheerfully, walking into the ring. He popped his knuckled with anticipation.

"Begin!" Kakashi threw his hand down and stepped back.

Lee threw the first punch, which Hisako dodged by tilting her head barely in time.

I got the feeling I was about to watch someone who outmatched me in strength and speed go up against my favorite teammate. But Hisako's got skill and a lot of it.

She kneed Lee in the stomach and brought and elbow down on his neck. Lee retaliated, elbowing her in the stomach and shoving her off into the air. Lee charged as Hisako landed, throwing a kick at her head. Hisako ducked beneath and Lee hurriedly spun and backpedaled away to avoid her attempted nut shot.

Geeze, Hisako. I thought Sensei said to not kill them.

Hisako was on the offensive now, throwing two punches that were both blocked and she took a counter punch to the gut. She responded with a punch to Lee's nose and jumped backward to dodge his leg-sweep. Lee's nose was bleeding, but the resolve of steel he wore on his face looked undaunted.

Lee charged forward, feinting a kick before slamming Hisako in the face with an exaggerated right cross.

Ow.

Hisako was almost knocked down, but she landed on her hands and she sprung back into the action, slamming both her feet into Lee's stomach and knocking him into the dirt. Contrasting the massive swollen lip she was going to be sporting, she was grinning like an idiot, wiping blood off her chin.

Well, I'm glad she's having fun.

Lee had managed to recover on his landing and assumed a defensive stance. That was the rule, you were down when you stayed down...within reason. But our Sensei's honor was at stake here so we were going to try a lot harder than normal.

Hisako charged and managed to his a face-shot with her fist, but Lee powered through it, slugging her across the cheek, then hit her twice more, causing her to go out like a light. Hisako looked disoriented and she was probably going to be feeling that over the next few days.

I had some medical supplies in a storage scroll. Need to figure out how to make Stim-Paks for my teammates; an injury in the field could cascade into multiple fatalities and Stim-Paks would make them way less dangerous.

"Lee is the winner," Kakashi called impartially.

Quest Updated: Youthful Competition!

Watch your teammates compete: (1 / 2).

Lee offered a hand of assistance to Hisako, who took it while rubbing her cheek. "That was very youthful, Hisako-chan! You were a worthy opponent and I am honored to have sparred with you."

"Yeah," Hisako nodded, seeming a little light headed. "You weren't so bad yourself. We should do this again."

"Yosh!" Lee said happily, blood from his nose dripping around his smiling lips. "We have a lot to learn from each other!"

"You fought great, Lee!" Gai called happily. "Next up, Neji!"

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 6.

Wait, isn't Nichiren wanting to be a medic-nin?

"Nichiren, you have any medical supplies?" I asked as Hisako walked back over to us. "Because Hisako looks…"

"Daisuke, you're up," Kakashi said.

I stood up and looked at Hisako.

"I got her, Daisuke," Nichiren assured me, digging into his pack for some bandages.

"Thanks Nichiren," Hisako replied tiredly. "Thanks Daisuke."

"You're welcome," I said with a smile, stepping into the ring.

"Be careful, Daisuke!" Anko called, walking up next to Hisako and Nichiren. "Hate to see you hurt!"

"Always," I replied, turning to face my opponent.

Neji looked stoic. The appearance of stoicism is not actual stoicism, though, and if I remember correctly, Neji was a ball of anger, pain and sadness. He was also a jerk, which made it harder to feel sympathetic for him.

I mean, I did.

"Byakugan."

But not enough to make this a fair fight.

His eyes narrowed. "You're in my trigrams."

"I can see you too." I folded my hands behind my back.

Neji assumed a gentle-fist stance. "You do not know what I mean. I will show you."

Self Imposed Challenge time!

The Gentle Fist style closes tenketsu by shocking the chakra points with carefully injected chakra, which causes damage to the internal organs due to their proximity. The swelling interrupts chakra flow through the tenketsu, causing the paralysis that is often associated with the Gentle Fist style.

The Byakugan lets you see tenketsu if it's developed enough.

But you don't need to see a tenketsu to close it.

So, that's my challenge: Before this match is over, I'm going to close one of Neji's tenketsu.

He attacked and I dodged, walking around him.

Perception Check Failed: 7 / 9.

Taijutsu Check Success: 80 / 75.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 7.

I couldn't just see where he was attacking, I just didn't have the eyes, heh, for it. I did, however, have the Taijutsu experience and Intelligence to make up for it. That attack was meant for my right breast. Good to know.

My challenge here was three-fold. First, I needed to figure out where my tenketsu points were by reverse engineering Neji's attack pattern since he could see my points. Then, I needed transpose my network of tenketsu onto Neji to figure out where his chakra points were. Finally, I needed to strike a point with enough chakra to close the tenketsu.

He swiftly adapted to my dodge, chasing after me, throwing chakra-enveloped strikes at my neck, shoulders and arms. But I dodged side to side, swept beneath a strike, then slid behind him.

The Gentle Fist style had so many ways to attack you. Honestly, if I need to take someone alive, I could use it as a substitute for Tsunade's Megaton Punch. Well, I could, if I could see chakra or knew enough about chakra networks to get a rough estimate.

Neji looked confused. With his defensive stance, he started orbiting me, while I kept myself facing him by sliding on the dirt beneath my feet. He charged forward, feinting a strike with his left palm while his right wrapped around to hit my leg. My response was to slide backwards out of his reach, then circle around him.

Actually, come to think about it, wouldn't someone have mapped out a general picture of a person's chakra network?

Medicine Check Failed: 27 / 85.

Yeah, figures. I only know the general details of anatomy and I'd need the finer points.

Still, Neji was feeding me valuable data. I don't think he's tried to attack the same point once and he is slow enough that I can get a good look at his form. A little disappointed that he's so easy to read, but it's understandable. He hasn't had the years of training under Gai-sensei that would turn him into the monster genin Naruto had to fight during the exams.

"Are you going to attack me?" Neji asked irritably.

"Maybe someday," I replied flatly.

"This is supposed to be a sparring match," Neji pointed out.

"You have to hit someone before you can call it a sparring match," I replied, keeping a straight face getting more challenging by the second.

Medicine Check Success: 27 / 20.

I knew for a fact that the human body had 361 tenketsu. By watching his attacks, I was getting information on where they were clumped up the tightest, since he clearly wasn't a master of gentle fist. Yet.

He attacked again, his frustration making him sloppy. I got to one knee and slid past him once again. From my new vantage point, I could see Gai-sensei, who was watching me. Surprisingly, he didn't look offended or confused. He was pensive, like he had figured out I was trying something and didn't know what.

Kakashi and Anko as well. Kakashi tried to hide it behind a cool meter of indifference, but Anko's eyes were narrowed in careful analysis.

Perception Check Success: 7 / 7.

Slide to the left! Slide to the right!

Cha-cha now, y'all.

...not really. But dodging Neji was fun, if only to watch him grow more and more frustrated.

Taijutsu Check Success: 80 / 80.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 9.

Okay, I think I've worked out where one of his points are. On his forearm, in the mid-point between his Radius and Ulna bones. Just need an opportunity to hit it and I've only got one shot at it or this'll go on forever.

He reached out to hit my left shoulder with a palm strike, the rest of his body primed to chase after me when I dodged this attack as well.

I grabbed his wrist with my right hand and with my left, I plunged two fingers where I thought the tenketsu point was.

Chakra Control Check Success: 92 / 45.

Taijutsu Check Success: 80 / 80.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 10.

...did I do it?

Because those checks are making me think I did, but if there's a hidden Perception check happening, I am going to be so tilted.

He stumbled backward, holding his arm, his eyes wide. He looked up at me, then back to his arm, then back at me, his Byakugan had deactivated as his eyes were blinking in rapid succession.

"You shut my tenketsu!" His eyes may as well have popped out of their sockets.

All around the arena, there were gasps. Not even normal gasps, either. These were proper anime grunts of absolute shock.

I threw up my hands. "Woo! Self-Imposed challenge completed!"

"How?" Neji asked, looking thoroughly creeped out. "How did you do that?"

"Well, I had to sit back and watch you try to hit me to figure out where the points were," I began to explain, taking my hands out from behind my back. "Because the Gentle Fist style is all about hitting these points, I used you as a measuring stick to figure out where my points were. Then I transposed this imaginary network onto you to figure out where your points were...and then I just had to hit you."

"But how?" Neji demanded. I swear, he looked like he was going to cry. "How did you do that?"

"I have a very large brain," I said with a satisfied smile.

"You...you," Neji was gritting his teeth. The veins around his eyes started to swell up and he brought his palms back up. "It doesn't matter."

I just shrugged. "I'm going to win the match now."

Then I charged. Wasn't holding back this time, so Neji's end was swift. Knee to the stomach, hook to the right temple. Twist on the dirt, trip him and send him down face first. Then, with a hand on the back of his head, I looked up. "I think that's game."

Quest Updated: Youthful Competition!

Completed: Win your match.

"Shimoda Daisuke wins!" Gai threw his hand up to call it. "I've never seen such fine Taijutsu in all my life!"

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 5.

That was just exuberant hyperbole, but I appreciated the compliment. Neji ignored my offered hand as he stood up. I went to sit with my team.

"Daisuke," Hisako sounded that awestruck, holding her hands together like a school-girl. "That was...that was amazing!"

"I didn't know you could do that," Nichiren said, alternated between rapidly pointing at the field and looking at me.

"That makes two of us," Anko added, looking down at me from her standing position. "That really was some of the best Taijutsu I've ever seen and I am not kidding."

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

She meant it.

That made me kind of warm. "Thanks!"

I turned to Hisako and Nichiren. "All of you."

"Tenten, show them the fires of your youth!" Gai cried.

"Nichiren, you're up," Kakashi said, looking down at me with confusion. A little pride, sure, but he knows for a fact that he didn't teach me that.

Eh, that's fine. I'm learning plenty just being on the team and he is teaching me stuff. Though I do want him to teach me more jutsu. I'll ask at the start of our next training meet.

Nichiren squared off against Tenten. I knew he was still a little tired from training, but Tenten was looking really apprehensive. Once Kakashi started the spar, she went over zealous. Punch to the cheek, leg sweep and bounced back on her feet away from him.

My teammate in the ring got back up slowly, but he didn't last long. Tenten got more confident and after a few minutes of trading blows, Nichiren was sent to the ground, and he couldn't get up.

"The winner is Tenten!" Gai called. "Two to one means we win the challenge! The score is now 49 to 49!"

Quest Completed: Youthful Competition!

5,200 / 18,000 to level 8.

Nice!

"Good old Gai," Anko muttered, shaking her head in amusement.

"Is he always like that?" Hisako asked with a frown.

"Absolutely," Anko answered, her smile getting wider with every word. "And since he and your Sensei are such close friends, you're going to be seeing a lot of him."

"Really?" Hisako's nose scrunched up. "I mean, it was fun, I guess, but…"

"You guess?" I asked with a smirk standing up with her to give Nichiren a hand when he didn't get up immediately. "You were smiling up a storm before you got knocked out."

"Hey, I really enjoy a good fight," Hisako pointed at me. "But there's too much of a good thing."

"I'll agree to that."
* * *​

With the competition ended, the training meet was called to a close. Kakashi-sensei gave us two days off in order to recover from our intensive inter-team training exercise, which is to say, Hisako and Nichiren needed time to mend their wounds since we went a little harder than we necessarily should have. Kind of a shame. I would've liked some more missions to get to level 8 faster.

Now, then! I had 48 Fuinjutsu, which meant that I could take a look at my Mixing Seal to understand why it wouldn't mix my Chocolate Milk properly!

Back at the apartment, I walked in and Anko took her usual post by my window outside.

...you know, I keep debating whether I should get a TV or not. I don't know if there's a lot of signals being broadcast so I don't know if it'd be worth it.

Whatever, that can wait.

I got everything together for my chocolate milk experiment.

"You think you got it figured out?" Anko asked with apparent interest.

"I guarantee it," I said with a grin, bringing up my old, failed seal array that I had nearly given myself a conniption trying solve, then force a solution, a few days ago.

Fuinjutsu Check Success: 48 / 45.

Immediately, I saw the problem. Just a small part of the framework that actually inhibited the items from mixing properly. It's there on regular storage seals to prevent items from getting jumbled together, but I'm overwriting its function with the mixing seal, so it literally doesn't need to exist.

So I created the seal, obtained some blood from my knuckles and started the mix. The glass of milk and bowl of chocolate syrup disappeared, then reappeared on the output circle. Well, the bowl with the syrup was empty and the milk was a healthy chocolate brown. I grabbed it and took a swig.

Ah...delicious.

"Nice work!" Anko said approvingly. "See, you just needed a few days to sleep on it."

...you know what, she's right in spirit. Needed a little boost. "Yeah. Thanks for your help."

"No problem!" Anko replied with a grin.

"Anyway, let me get you a glass," I said, standing up and running to the kitchen.

"Oh you don't have to-" But I want too, so I ignored her.

Got the glass and more syrup, used the mixing seal and handed the glass to Anko. She looked down at it, and smiled. "Thank you. But you didn't have too."

"You're right," I nodded. "But I wanted to, so...cheers."

"To future success," Anko toasted with a grin and clinked our glasses and drank up.

I placed the milk down on a side table and got to work replacing the coffee table. Once that was done, I sat in my recliner. "Why don't you sit down? Seriously, you can watch the door and window from that spot on the couch."

Anko thought about it for a second. "Alright. But seriously, I have a job to do."

"And I appreciate that you're doing it," I said with a smile. "So, how long have you been a Jounin?"

"Special Jounin," Anko corrected. "But...three years now?"

"What kind of missions do Special Jounin get to do?" I asked.

"Well," Anko started. "Body Guarding is one, obviously. Usually, though, I'm sent on stealth and recon in hostile countries when I'm not hunting down missing nin."

"I get the feeling you've been all over," I said, swirling the chocolate milk with my chakra to get a swirl in my glass.

"Oh yeah. Mostly the Land of Earth," Anko replied. She took a sip before continuing. "Lots of rolling hills and high plateaus. Trying to attack the place would be difficult because of the terrain alone. I mean, you might not think it because we can climb walls, but they build traps and scout nests into the walls to catch Shinobi doing just that."

"Like trap-door spiders," I said.

Anko shrugged. "If you say so."

"How do you counter them?" I asked, arching an eyebrow.

"You just watch as their little foxholes spontaneously develop snake infestations for no reason at all," Anko said, shaking her head in mock-confusion. "I just don't seem to understand how it keeps happening, but it does."

She grinned.

"Man, they sound like real menaces," I said with mock sympathy. "If only they'd stop trying, am I right?"

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

"You are right," Anko nodded. "Of course...if you've got good aim..."

Before I could blink, a kunai ripped through the air, flying right past my ear and embedding itself in the wall behind me.

I looked at it and noted that she had gotten a single one of my hairs that was floating on the breeze down on the couch.

With a whistle of appreciation, I turned back to her. "I imagine you've taken out your fair share of snipers."

"That I have," Anko said, balancing her head on her hand, swirling her drink in the other. It was odd, like her entire demeanor was shifting somehow. Her eyes were gently narrowing and she maintained eye contact as her smile curled up in a feline grin.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

I think I just passed some kind of test.

Works for me.

Then her eyes got wide and she cleared her throat, sitting up straight and leaning forward. "I'm sorry, I really shouldn't be throwing kunai at my clients. I just, uh...wow. Um. Sorry. Really."

"Anko," I held up a hand. "It's fine. To be perfectly honest, even if you hit me, it wouldn't have mattered."

Anko blinked owlishly. "Getting hit with a kunai doesn't matter? Really?"

"Healing factor," I explained helpfully. "Only thing I need is a bed and a nap."

"...right," Anko said, looking confused and analytical. "That's another part of your Kekkei Genkai?"

"It is," I answered with a grin. "But if you want to ask questions about that, you'll need to answer questions of mine."

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

Speech Check Success: 36 / 25.

Anko blinked and gave a grin that was much shakier than it appeared. "That's okay. It's totally fine, I was just curious."

Well, so was I.
* * *​

Fuinjutsu 48 / 100.

Ranged Weapons 33 / 100.
* * *​

Author's Note: Here you go. I think I got everything I was supposed too. Another thing I wound up having trouble with, even aside from the numbers, was remembering the game notifications. Those are very important for Daisuke's internal narrative so I hope I got the important ones, at least. It's been a while, so if you notice any jarring changes please let me know and I'll get too them.

Eventually.

Seriously, this fic was full of typos and I just went through the day before posting this and fixed as many as I could.

Now...as to why this is back, and I think it is back.

As you all know, I had a deep, deep dissatisfaction with Daisuke as a character. It actually stemmed from his character build. How he played at the start of the game and how he wound up playing later in the game were vastly different. The reason for this is that I have a favorite PC archetype.

The Gunslinger.

My problem was that Daisuke was not this at all and I was trying to figure out how to shoehorn him into being my favorite PC archetype. Well, that's just not what Daisuke was. Daisuke was a brawler, at home in the center of a massive, bloody fight with gore flying everywhere. He's not this and he's certainly not this. He's THIS. Accepting what Daisuke was enabled me to get over my issues with his character and write him correctly.

I had to accept Daisuke for who he was and not what I wanted him to be.

Secondly, and more importantly, I was just sick of this thing. Sick to my stomach. I couldn't even look at Naruto memes. This was due to Patreon, which I have removed myself from. I just had to keep updating and updating because that's what people wanted to read. I needed to keep my audience and I had no confidence that anything I wrote would ever be as popular and impactful as SHINOBI: The RPG. Then I started failing and I had a giant pot of resentment that boiled over. It wasn't good.

I blamed everyone when I really was just mad at myself.

Thirdly, I had an issue. The most compelling part of the original fic was the Charisma deficit and the problems it caused. When I was writing it, I wrote essays. Entire essays. To myself. About how to scheme to keep that a problem, but we've been over this. The main thing I wanted to talk about was that, given how utterly hollow a dilemma it was in the first fic, I couldn't keep it around for the rewrite. But I wanted to maintain the charisma deficit as a problem and source of strife, I just wasn't sure how.

Now, I've got an idea, but it's going to be a lot less dramatic of an issue as it was.

So there you are. It's back. I think. Updates aren't going to be weekly, or if they are, it won't be for long. Either way, thanks for the encouragement and well wishes, everyone. I'm happy to see all of you back and I'm happy to be writing again.

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Informative: Cell 13's theme music.
Alright, so as many of you know, I'm a League of Legends player. Not so much as I used to be, but I still enjoy a game here and again. The game has a lot of excellent music attached to it, stuff that I actually use to get me in the mood for writing. Most of this music was composed for the login screens; animated wall papers you'd get to see before logging into the game. I personally was a huge fan, though Riot themselves stopped making them.

So in the interest of sharing, I'm posting a few champion themes that bring some of the characters in my fic to life. In my head. They help inspire me, is what I'm trying to say.

Daisuke said:

Hisako said:

Nichiren said:

And, of course, I'd be very remiss if I didn't include the AMV that inspired a great deal of the first draft and allowed me to write the grand majority of it.

Kakashi - My Demons.

---

Not to mention English is one of the best examples of a language seemingly purposefully DESIGNED to be hard to reverse engineer. We have so many contradictory rules, and exceptions, and exceptions inside the exceptions that we often have trouble actively, and intentionally teaching our young to speak, read, and write it.

I'll be honest with you, I hadn't even thought about this. English is my only language, so I really don't have a lot of, well, context to how difficult English can be to learn. So I really appreciate the time you took to point all this out to help with story fodder because it painted an anticipatory smile on my face if Daisuke ever gets the chance to teach Konoha English.

Imagine a hidden stone code breaker thinking he has the holy grail of extensive examples of the code, proceeds to work on it for literal months and comparing it to recorded examples of the spoken form, only to burst a fucking blood vessel about C and K both existing, or the different rules for what sound CH can mean, or all the silent letters, or letters that make different sounds contextually with no consistent rule. Fucking imagine it.

Hehehehehehehehehe...

Have a cookie. :D
 
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Musings: Humans are just Featherless Penguins - GalacticPlumber
I've just had a terrifying realization. Humans are just featherless penguins.

We often propose to each other with unusually smooth rocks, we're one of the most aggressive fish predators, we've obsessed over finding ways to travel while laying on our stomachs, and we ARE adapted to multiple days in a row walking if necessary. We even have native adaptation for every form of travel but flying which we're really fucking salty about.

And like all birds we're obsessed with shiny things.
 
Chapter 12: Aquaphobia
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *

11,300 / 18,000 Until level 8.

A surprisingly good side-effect of Danzo's armed insurrection being so pathetic was that the lock down didn't last very long.

Lock downs were used in case of attack by enemy shinobi. If you couldn't get to a designated civilian shelter, you stuck in your homes. If you were a Genin, it was your duty to fortify your home so that any enemies that came by would lose numbers; an enemy army that swept in would slowly be grated like cheese through the endless sea of traps and hidden attacks.

Once lock down was lifted, you had to report to a Jounin in charge of taking inventory of the damages of your block or district. They weren't going to come find you, because the village would be a minefield. Once that was done, you could return to your every day life.

Since the lock down lifted, we had a surge of D-Rank missions, mostly centered around reconstruction. There were as good a source of EXP as ever, but I was hoping to be level 8 by now. At 1 to 2k a pop, they aren't going to scale well when it takes 50,000 exp to level up.

To my annoyance, though, we weren't even doing a mission today. Instead, we were training.

Or going to train. Kakashi was late, as usual.

We were told to meet at the posts of training ground. Hisako was leaning against one of the wooden posts in the ground, idly twirling her kunai on her fingers out of boredom. Nichiren had the right idea, though, and had used his ninja wire to string up a hammock in between a pair of pine trees. Standing beneath the shade of one of those trees was Anko, who kept watch for threats.

I don't think she's going to be on the payroll for much longer, honestly. S-rank missions are expensive and she's being consistently paid to do nothing.

For me, I was sitting on the ground, going through my little notebook and trying to optimize my late game since I've got my early levels on lock. It occurred to me that I haven't really hit up any civilian bookstores. Sure, I seriously doubted they'd have anything on Chakra Control or Ninjutsu, but Medicine, Survival, Barter? Speech?

I need those skills too.

"Hey, he's here," Nichiren said, pointing across the way from his hammock.

As he got busy disassembling his improvised spiderweb, Hisako and I stood up. Kakashi-sensei at least had the decency to look sheepish. "Hey, sorry everyone. There was a long line at the grocery store and their sale was going to end at noon today."

Hisako growled in annoyance.

"You know, that is actually the most plausible excuse he's given us yet," I said, standing up.

"These dumb excuses," Hisako grit through her teeth. "Should at least send us a clone. If he cares at all!"

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

She's been planning this.

"I don't need to send you a clone," Kakashi replied with an eye-smile. "Thanks to Daisuke, you all know I'm going to be late anyway."

Hey now...

Hisako looked apoplectic, red faced and I could easily picture steam coming out of her ears in frustration. She began sputtering her spicy rebuke. "Us knowing about it, that doesn't make it okay!"

"That one didn't have a kigo," Anko replied with a smirk.

"She says you don't need a third line for it to count," I supplied, impressed that she caught on to Hisako's character tic.

"Ah." Anko nodded.

"Might as well be late," Hisako sarcastically continued, her eye twitching. "Manners are draconian! No harm, no foul, right?"

"Precisely," Kakashi replied, still eye smiling. "But seriously, we should get started before we waste any more time."

Hisako spun on her heels in a huff and walked to join Nichiren and I in our trio.

"Now, this time we're doing something special," Kakashi said, completely unconcerned by Hisako's outburst.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

Call it a hunch, but he's going to talk it out with her later.

"Now, Nichiren, if you'll demonstrate what you've been working on on your own time?" Kakashi-sensei instructed.

"Sure!" Nichiren said, bringing his hands together in a Ram Seal. Then...he walked up the post.

"Nice!" I said with a grin. "Good job! Where did you learn that?"

"The Genin level of the library had a scroll on it," Nichiren replied, scratching the back of his head with a proud yet bashful smile on his face. "I've been working on it since that fiasco with the house."

"That's awesome!" Hisako said, giving him a thumbs up. "Great job!"

"And that brings us to today's training," Kakashi said with an eye-smile. "Water-walking."

Wait, what?

"Ooh!" Hisako brought her hands together, puppy dog eyes shining brightly.

"That's going to be cool," Nichiren said, eyes also shining.

Water walking.

As in, walking on...lakes?

Lakes with imperceptible depths that might have things living in them?

Large things that can swallow a man whole?

"Now, if you'll all follow me to the shore," Kakashi said, beckoning all of us...to the lake.

Yeah, that lake.

Sure, it's waters gleamed and shined with the light of the sun above, providing a tranquil, picturesque scene that betrayed how terrible the things that might lurk beneath the surface are.

I mentally sighed.

Yes, I knew that neither Cthulhu or his cousin, The Kraken lived in the depths of the lake of Training Ground 3. Intellectually. But I couldn't see to the bottom and that means that the voice that piped up in the back of my head made sure that I was perfectly aware that I couldn't confirm it with my own two eyes.

Plus, I'm a video game character. Might not be true for my game but our kind has a long, storied and exasperatedly stupid history of dying in water. Super drowning skills, they called it in my old world.

So we got to the shore and Hisako hurriedly shed her jacket and shirt, leaving only a black sports bra on her chest and conflicted feelings in me. Shedding her pants and tabi sandals left a pair of sport panties. Nichiren stripped to his boxers and I left my clothes on, thank you very much. I was not getting wet.

"Water surface walking is more difficult than tree walking," Kakashi started, making a Ram Seal with his fingers. "Just because water is a liquid, it makes for a more delicate balance to walk across than a tree. You must maintain a constant repelling force to remain above the surface of the water. If you give too little chakra, you'll sink. If you give too much, you'll sink. Any questions?"

We all shook our heads.

"Begin!"

I mentally sighed, and looked into the depths of the gross water filled with fish droppings, fish and who knows what swimming along the bottom waiting to devour my soul. Hisako and Nichiren took off at a run, channeling chakra and making it all of two steps into the water before sinking below the surface.

Couldn't chicken out, Anko and Hisako were watching. If I did, they'd worry about me and that idea was multiple shades of uncomfortable.

So, I took a breath. Rolling my shoulders, I sent chakra to my feet and did my best to appear nonchalant as I walked across the surface of the water.

Charisma Check Failure: 7 / 8.

Shut up, game.

Chakra Control Check Success: 80 / 25.

Only a twenty five? Really? Well, I guess if Genin are supposed to be able to do this, that makes sense. Figured it'd be higher to prevent a specialist like me from unlocking all the cool toys.

"Hey, Daisuke's already got it!" Nichiren said, stopping his swim to shore to point at me.

"Of course he does!" Hisako said with a grin that made me think that this wasn't really too bad. "He's Daisuke!"

"Well," I began, scratching the back of my head. "I try."

"Nice work, Daisuke-kun!" Kakashi-sensei called from the shore. "Try doing some Taijutsu Kata since you're already out there!"

Man, really? "Yes, Sensei!"

Charisma Check Failure: 7 / 8.

I went through a basic rotation. Hisako and Nichiren charged forward again and found themselves plunging beneath the surface. With a glance, I made sure neither Hisako or Nichiren thought it'd be a good idea to try to pull me beneath the surface to join them. Thankfully, they were both completely professional and swam back to shore to try again.

Need to bring towels, if there's a next time.

When I was finished with my rotation, I called across the shore. "Kakashi-sensei, can I come to shore now?"

Kakashi blinked. "Yes."

I body flickered to shore, causing a massive riptide of water to shoot out like a geyser behind me. Safely back on dry land once again, I sat down with my legs crossed.

Much better.

"Is there a problem, Daisuke-kun?" Kakashi asked, looking down at the lake. I could see Hisako and Nichiren looking at me with confusion.

Well, nothing for it I suppose. "I just...don't like large bodies of water. Can't see the bottom, so anything could be swimming down there, you know?"

Kakashi hummed. "We're going to have to work on that."

I blinked. "I can operate on the water just fine. Apparently. I'd just rather not."

"But if you get a mission to the Land of Water," Kakashi pointed out. "A fear of water would be...problematic, wouldn't you agree?"

I grunted and turned back to the lake, where Hisako and Nichiren were going for another pass. Wasn't sure they'd get water walking today, but Nichiren's already surprised me with tree walking so who knows?
* * *​

Bum-bum-bum-Bum!

Level 8!

About time.

I put all 17 points into Fuinjutsu, bringing it up to 65. Then Fuinjutsu Enthusiast for the perk, like I planned. Nice!

Level 9 will bring my seals up to 80 and then that's two points that'll go toward Medicine, bringing it to 29. The sooner I can get to genetic tampering and thus, permanent stat boosts, the better.

Just more D-ranks and more training. Literally nothing of note happened. In a way, I was surprised that Kakashi hadn't pressed me on my fear of water; then again, I think he might have put that on the back burner to focus on Hisako and Nichiren.

Anko was my ever present shadow, something that I realized grated on Hisako's nerves, but she eventually grew tolerant. I realized that her issue is that she has a crush on me and Anko might have been a threat to her romantic interest.

...I'm going to have to think about that issue later. One problem at a time.

Speaking of genetic tampering, I wish I could've asked Anko about it. I'm not going to because I'm mostly sure that Orochimaru and her past with him is probably a sore topic and not something I can ask about without throwing up a bunch of red flags and getting hauled back off to the Hokage's office.

I narrowly escaped death the last time, I'm not going to test my luck twice.

...that means that I'm going to have to actually perform my tampering away from Anko. Either late at night, or outside of the village entirely. Better to ask for forgiveness than permission, eh?

At least, I hope.

"Hey, Anko?" I started, turning from my little black book to face her. "You said you had a few books on Jutsu?"

"I did," Anko said, snapping her fingers and pointing at me. "Actually, it's almost time for lunch, you want to come over to my apartment and I can fix you something? We can pick them up over there."

"That'd be great," I replied with a grin. "Once we're done there, we'll head to the book store."

"Which one?" Anko asked with a light smirk. "Behind you."

I turned in place and circled around a lamppost before turning back to face her. "Thanks. And...actually, I don't know. I want to see if there's some books on Medicine I can buy."

"What, like Medical Jutsu?" Anko asked with an arched eyebrow.

"Nah, just Medicine in general," I said with a shrug. "I need more skills than just Jutsu, you know."

"That is true," Anko replied with a nod.

"Besides, when I'm done with them, I can give them to Nichiren since he wants to be a Field Medic," I said, turning forward to avoid almost running into something.

"I'm on the left," Anko directed.

Anko's apartment was on the second story of a complex, up a set of stairs and directly to the right. Once we got there, Anko flashed a set of silver keys and let us in. She rather insistently gestured for me to go inside first and I obliged.

After all, bodyguard, even if I did want to let the lady in first.

The apartment was small. It let in to a small great room with a kitchen table and mats right off the stove and counter space. Her sitting room had a table with kneeling mats around it, as well as a couch leaning against the right-most wall. Next to it was a three-shelve high book case. Halfway from the entrance was a hallway going left, where I assumed the bathroom bedroom would be placed.

"Welcome to my humble abode," Anko said cheerily, walking past me into the kitchen. "Go ahead and have a seat wherever, I'll have lunch ready shortly. Books are on the shelf, help yourself!"

"Thanks," I said with a grin, making sure to remove my sandals before stepping onto the carpet once I saw that she had removed hers. Over to the book case, I noted that not only were the books inside filling the shelves to the brim, there were books stacked on top of rows because no more room otherwise.

Finer Points: Chakra Control for the Discerning Shinobi.

The Five Elements and You: A Guide to Elemental Chakra Control.

Wait, hold it. These are Chakra control manuals that I haven't read.

I've been sitting at 92 Chakra Control since I graduated, so I am totally borrowing these! I'll have 100 in that skill and then I'm going to throw a party!

Or something.

Look, the point is that I'm going to be perfect at this one thing. As good as I can possibly be. It's definitely worth celebrating.

I was distracted from my ramblings when I heard the stove turn on in the kitchen. That's when I realized that Anko was going to straight up make something. For me.

...huh.

That's really cool of her.

Uh...well...wow.

I blinked owlishly, and stood up, walking over to the kitchen. She was grilling some beef cuts in a pan, as well as cooking some rice on another burner. "May I help at all?"

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

Anko turned to me and blinked owlishly. I noticed that she had shed her coat and was cooking in just her...transparent mesh armor. Wow. "Uh, sure. You can set the table for me. We're just using rice bowls, though."

"Alright," I said, looking around for the bowls.

"That cupboard," Anko helpfully pointed with a small smile. "You don't need to grab the trays if you don't want too."

I opened the cupboard and grabbed the trays anyway. If either of us spilled (by us, I mean me), it'd make the ensuing mess easier to clean up. Fast and efficient.

Setting a table in the Elemental Nations meant trays, which would then house a wide variety of bowls and plates which would contain toppings of various kinds. Such as a plate for that meat that Anko was grilling. "We want plates for the beef?"

She blinked. "You know what, yes. That'd be a great idea. I'm thinking of grilling up some onions with them too, now that I think about it."

"They in the fridge?" I asked, pointing to the white refrigerator against the kitchen wall.

"In the bottom drawer, I think," Anko answered, turning her attention back to the grill.

I opened the fridge and checked the bottom vegetable drawer and, like she said, I found some small, white onions. Nice. I grabbed two and closed the fridge. Placing them on the counter next to the stove, I moved over to the kitchen table, noting that Anko's coat was lying folded next to one of the seats. I placed a mat there, and…

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

A mat right across from her seat so we could look at each other while we talked. It's the little things.

Next came the bowls, then the trays, one in the eleven o'clock position for the beef, the next at twelve o'clock for the onions. Finally, the sets of chopsticks before each bowl.

See, I paid attention in my beginner's infiltration class. High Society is easy to meander with once you know the rules and can tolerate the sheer elitism emanating from the smug, punch-able carcass they call a face.

"Anything else?" I asked with a smile.

Anko blinked and gave an appreciative smile. "No, actually, I think it's almost done. You can have a seat or something and lunch will be ready soon. Thank you so much!"

"You're very welcome," I said with a grin, moving over to the seat.

I could kneel around a table. I didn't prefer it thanks to the Westerner in me growing up, the first time, with chairs. But I could do it. Wasn't even uncomfortable, since I've done it for so long.

After a few minutes of waiting, Anko served lunch. A bowl of rice with beef slices and grilled onions on the side. After a blessing, we started to eat.

"So you graduated from the academy three years early?" Anko asked.

I swallowed the mouthful of rice and beef I had eaten. "That's right. Wasn't put on a team until this year, though. How about you?"

"I graduated after four years like everyone else," Anko replied with a small smile. "I got promoted to Chunin in the same exams as your Sensei, actually."

"No kidding." I gave an intrigued expression, softly nodding. "What was the stunt that got you the promotion? I know they don't just hand it out to anyone."

"Oh, third phase," Anko started, looking wistful. "I was fighting this guy from Grass. He turned the entire arena into a grassy jungle. Blades taller than I am now and they were sharp. It was like a forest of knives."

I hummed in thought, leaning forward while she told her story.

"I could not fight this guy from Grass in the forest of knives, so I tunneled underground and set an army of venomous snakes loose in the arena," Anko replied with a grin. "At the end, he had bite marks all over him and everything was swelling. He looked like a living grapevine."

"You're so smart," I replied with a beaming smile. "Did he die?"

"Nah," Anko shook her head with a grin. "But he sure wanted to!"

We laughed. Anko closed her eyes and stretched her arms out over her head and I...started looking. The way her mesh was transparent around her navel and arms yet became infuriatingly opaque around her sensitive areas was a mystery I demanded to solve. She was athletic, her body flawlessly toned and shapely. She opened her eyes, caught my looking and turned her head with a small smile on her face.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

With that unspoken permission, my eyes just drank in her body. Her amazing chest, the gap in between her thighs. I could feel my pulse quicken as I thought of what it'd be like to be with her in more intimate circumstances. What it'd be like to have her. Eventually, she turned back toward me and I immediately made eye contact.

"You know you're gorgeous, right?" I asked flatly.

"Well, thank you," Anko said with a wide, toothy grin. "You aren't so bad yourself. Little young, I guess, but you'll grow out of that."

"I'd better," I replied flatly. "If I'm stuck at twelve forever for some reason, I'll go insane."

She chortled. "So, if I could ask..."

"Shoot," I said.

"I read a little bit about your mission inside that mansion," Anko started, looking down at the plate, then at me. "And I was wondering if you'd, well, tell me about it? How you got through it all?"

Leaning forward, I clasped my hands together in front of my mouth. "Well."

I told the story, starting from when I got the text prompt for the named quest. She sputtered in disbelief when Nichiren asked The Forbidden Question and her eyes got wide when I explained the bodies in the attic. She got very quiet as I told about the shifting mansion, the cells and music room. The lab, the tapes. Anko laughed at the name I gave the wallies and then grunted in surprise at the Werecrow being locked in the lab.

Finally, I got to the part where I blew it to pieces. "That was amazing."

"Thank you," I replied with a grin. "Honestly, I was just glad I was able to pull it off. If I hadn't, who knows what would've happened to my teammates."

"I noticed that Hisako likes you," Anko said directly. "Like, really likes you."

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

"She's great, but I'm not really interested in a relationship with her," I immediately stated, hoping to avoid a misunderstanding. "Not right now."

One at a time.

Anko hummed. "Yeah, teammate relationships tend to go down in flames. If you do pursue something there, I'd wait until you're no longer on a team together."

"I'm surprised you aren't trying to dissuade me entirely," I replied with an arched eyebrow.

"Well, you've got a strong new bloodline," Anko pointed out with a shrug. "I assumed you were going to have a harem."

"Ah."

Anko's eyes narrowed with concern. "What's wrong?"

"I haven't quite decided how I feel about that just yet," I answered truthfully.

Look, you don't live in the Elemental Nations long without getting an understanding of harems. Due to the constant Shinobi wars, women outnumbered men four to one, so supply and demand dictated a form of polygyny. A harem works like this; you get your first wife, whose place is assured no matter what and then the rest have to maintain their place by maintaining the Husband and First Wife's good graces. Depending on the Husband and First wife, the Concubines would either be treated as well as the first couple or treated like a stable of harlots.

"Really?" Anko blinked. "What are you conflicted about?"

"Well, I'm not sure I'd be able to keep the girls happy," I replied. "Putting aside all the feelings of envy and jealousy, maintaining a happy relationship takes time. Then you add in the envy and jealousy, political intrigue and it's a recipe for disaster. That's even if you treat them well."

Anko looked taken aback. "Oh."

"I don't know why you wouldn't treat them well, they might as well be members of the family at that point," I said, shrugging. "But then I've read stories about how Concubines poisoned the Husband because of how poorly he treated them."

She hummed in thought.

"So I'm still...thinking about it," I finished lamely. In truth, I wasn't thinking about it at all, because I've got 1 Charisma and being intimate is usually accomplished while naked – meaning I've got no gear on. So at the start I'd be looking like Fabio, she'd close her eyes for a second and then bam! A Weeping Angel's lying on top of her.

It's a funny problem, but a problem nonetheless. "Besides, I got to get my wife first."

"Well," Anko started, looking down. She looked like she was biting her tongue. "I know you'll figure it out. I believe in that large brain of yours."

I felt really warm inside. "Thanks, Anko."

She smiled, happily with her eyes closed.

"Now if I can ask you a question," I asked.

"Yeah, sure." Anko nodded.

"I don't think that body guarding me is the only part of your mission," I began, placing some beef and onions in the rice and using them to stick a clump together. "Otherwise I think your mission would've ended; S-class pay is expensive. So, what else are you supposed to be doing?"

"You're very perceptive, you know that?" Anko rhetorically asked, rubbing her eyes for a brief moment before answering my question. "You're right, guarding you isn't my only mission, I'm supposed to track down and either capture or kill the person who brought you to the village and whoever this 'Man In Green' is."

"And I'm your only lead, so you're sticking to me like glue," I said with a slow nod. "That makes sense."

"I am supposed to keep you safe, though," Anko added quickly, looking worried that she might have offended me in some way. "I'm not lying about that part of my mission. Not that I'd stop guarding you anyway."

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 4.

She's being honest. And I appreciate that.

"Well, if either of them show up, you'd better not think I'm going to stay behind you," I said with a smirk. "We'll take them on together, because I don't want you hurt either."

Anko let out a breath. "I don't think I could stop you, could I?"

"Nope!" I replied with a grin of my own.

She smiled lightly, looking at me with eyes that almost seemed to sparkle. "So...if you aren't thinking about Hisako, is there...I mean, are you seeing anyone right now?"

"You," I replied cheekily.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

Anko raised her finger to protest, then she got quiet. And pink. "Yeah, I guess we're dating, aren't we?"

"You're absolutely right."

Then we just fell to small talk. Not talking much about anything, but Anko's smile and sparkling eyes told me all I needed to know. As we both finished our bowls, something clicked in her head and she gasped. "I almost forgot! Don't go anywhere, I had something I wanted to give you."

Then she Body Flickered her way down the hall to her room. From the sound of ruffling, she was looking for something. "Now where did I put that thing?"

...you know, while she's doing that, I think I'm going to wash the dishes. Just because she just finished cooking this wonderful meal and I think she'd really appreciate it.

Chakra: 60 / 85.

Chakra strings stacked the dishes, silently, on top of each other and carried them over to the sink. I started the water and grabbed some soap.

Chakra Control Check Success: 92 / 65.

Interesting that my rigid chakra construct took so much control. It was just a dull, spiky chakra glove that could hold onto soap and smear it all over a dirty dish, pulling the leftover food off to wash it down the drain.

Aside from the dishes from our meal, there wasn't any, so my job was over quickly. I placed the last bowl in the drying rack and sent a wave of chakra to push the water from my hands to instantly dry them.

Right as I was unrolling my sleeves, Anko showed up with a book. She looked at the table, then at the dishes in the drying rack, then at me. "Did you just do the dishes?"

"Yup!" I said with a grin. "Figured you'd appreciate it."

"I," She started, blinking rapidly in surprise. "I do appreciate it. Thank you so much! You didn't need to...I mean, thank you. Really."

"You're welcome!" I beamed.

Anko's attention turned to the book in her arms. "This book...was a gift to me from my Sensei. I figured, since you're so interested in learning Fuinjutsu, you might like it. So here. You can have it."

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

This had to have brought up a bunch of bad memories. So I wonder if her giving this to me was also about putting the past behind her? That's fine.

Gingerly, Anko handed me the book. Seals and Tenketsu: A practical look into Chakra-based augmentation.

This book is beyond perfect. I carefully opened it and saw that the margins had been filled with kanji. "You've written all over it."

"Yeah, sorry," Anko said, rubbing the back of her head in embarrassment. "I used to keep all my notes and stuff in the margins so I wouldn't forget."

"What? No, don't be sorry," I told her, looking up with a massive grin. "Marked up books are the best! They've got all sorts of useful anecdotes and clarifications that make the book that much more useful. You are awesome for this and I'll cherish this book."

Anko smiled wide...and leaned forward to kiss me on the cheek.

My face immediately went beet red, I could tell.
* * *
"So, today, I thought my cute little Genin would be ready for a surprise," Kakashi-sensei explained with an eye-smile.

If this is the part where he addresses my aquaphobia in detail, I'm going to be upset.

We were standing in the hallway outside the mission desk room. We were the sole occupants of this hallway, save Anko who was leaning against the wall with her hands in her pockets, watching the four of us.

Hisako leaned forward in anticipation. Nichiren adjusted his glasses out of habit.

"We're doing our first C-rank mission," Kakashi announced, producing a mission scroll, helpfully marked with the symbol for C-Rank mission...which was the English letter for C.

...oh, right. English already existed in Naruto. I forgot.

"Ooh!" Hisako bounced up to her feet in excitement.

"Awesome!" Nichiren replied with a grin.

If there ever was a time for something to go horribly wrong in this insane, screwed up world, a Team's first C-Rank is it.

Kakashi's unfurled the scroll and began reading. "Requesting one team of Ninja to escort a wagon for the Soma Shipping Industries. Civilian Supplies will be distributed and gathered at three towns along the way. There will also be a shipment of Kunai and Shuriken that Hidden Grass has purchased from Konoha. We will be guarding the small caravan to the border checkpoint to Hidden Grass, were escort will be taken over by Grass Shinobi. Any questions?"

"How long will we be gone?" Nichiren asked.

"A week, maybe two," Kakashi replied.

"How much survival supplies should we each carry?" Hisako asked. "In case the worst happens?"

"General rule of thumb is three days worth of supplies," Kakashi answered. "You can do more than that, but only carry what you can spare to lose. I've seen Shinobi lose hundreds of thousands of Ryo worth of supplies because their storage scroll got destroyed during a fight or they lost them in a river."

Hisako nodded.

"Any other questions?" Kakashi asked.

I was waiting for the quest notification, so I shook my head.

"Excellent, we'll take the mission," Kakashi said.

Immediately, my team turned to me.

Quest Added: The Eyes Have It!

Rendezvous with the wagon driver.

Optional: Recruit a second Genin Team to provide backup.

I blinked.

"Well?" Kakashi-sensei started, looking at me expectantly.

"It's got a name," I reported, giving them the best translation I could think of for that turn of phrase.

Kakashi repeated the name to himself, then turned to me. "Any objectives?"

"There's meeting with the wagon driver," I continued, going from memory as the quest notification disappeared from my sight. "And an optional objective to recruit a second Genin Team for backup."

"Optional objective?" Nichiren asked, frowning in surprise. "Those are a thing?"

"Those are indeed a thing," I answered.

"Who would be a second Genin team?" Hisako asked rhetorically.

"KAKASHI!"

Speak of the Green Devil, and he shall appear.

Gai-sensei ran up to Kakashi-sensei from down the hall. "Fancy meeting you here, Kakashi!"

"Gai," Kakashi repeated. "It's...nice to see you. I actually need to go talk to the Hokage, so if you could watch my cute little Genin for me, that'd be great."

"Yosh!" Gai gave Kakashi a sparkling thumbs up which still don't understand how it works-

Perception Check Failed: 7 / 8.

Shut up, Game!

...and Kakashi bolted down the hallway.

Gai was slowly followed by his trio of Genin. The first was Tenten, who politely bowed. "Hello, Team 13."

Neji saw me and froze solid for a hot second before bowing himself.

Lee was enthusiastic. "Hello, it is great to see you all! I hope we can have another Tai Jutsu tournament soon to see how we've all improved."

We all returned the bows.

"Yeah, the tournament was fun," I said with a shrug. "Well, fun for me. I don't think Neji appreciated it too much."

Neji froze again, his face going dark.

"Well, I hope that you'll consider training with me," Lee said brightly, giving a thumbs up. "Because the spring time of your youth is the perfect time to hone your edge and be the best that you can be and I know that I can learn a lot from you!"

I blinked and smirked. "As long as we spar without training weights, I'm game."

Lee paused. "W-well, you see, I'm not supposed too…"

Kakashi returned. "Gai, Hokage wants to talk with you too."

Gai looked confused, and his trademark cheer was dampened severely. "Okay. What's this about, Kakashi?"

"I'll explain on the way."

Perception Check Failed: 7 / 10.

The two men pretty much vanished, leaving only a breeze down the hall.

"What is going on?" Neji asked.

"Our first C-rank," Hisako said dourly. "And there's extenuating circumstances that mean it's going to be a problem."

"And you're probably joining us for it," Nichiren replied.

"That would be most youthful!" Lee said with a grin. "But I don't think Gai-sensei believes we're ready for a C-rank just yet."

"We're not even competing in the Chunin exams," Tenten elaborated with a huff. "It's kind of annoying."

"Gai-sensei just wants to make sure he can teach us everything he can before we move on," Lee pointed out with a stern expression. "There is little point to being promoted to Chunin if we're going to compromise a mission because of ignorance."

"I know," Tenten muttered, looking to the side. "I'm just being impatient, I guess."

"It's irrelevant," Neji sniffed. "We will go into the exams when our Sensei says, and not a moment before."

"Of course, Neji-kun," Tenten replied. "You're right."

I shrugged. "A bit of impatience is natural."

"Where are the exams being held this time?" Hisako asked with narrowed eyes.

"Suna," Tenten answered. "Off to compete for clients in the desert heat...maybe it's a good thing we're being held back."

The desert?

Now I've got The Good, The Bad and The Ugly running through my head. Haven't heard that tune in so long.

"Do you think Kakashi-sensei is going to place you three in the exams?" Lee asked brightly.

"Probably," Nichiren said. "He's kind of anxious to be rid of us."

"Well that's rude," Tenten rebuked, placing her hands on her hips.

"No, it makes sense," I added. "Kakashi-sensei's had a full plate since we passed the bell test."

Then Kakashi and Gai reappeared.

"Alright, everyone!" Gai said loudly and brightly. "I've got a surprise for you! Our First C-Rank mission!"

Lee gasped in excitement. "Gai-sensei!"

"Now let's go to Training Ground 3 so we can give you the details," Gai-sensei ordered with great enthusiasm.



With the nine of us, Kakashi, Gai, Anko, Hisako, Nichiren, Neji, Lee, Tenten and myself, Training Ground Three felt crowded.

"So! Shimoda-kun here gets premonitions about his missions," Gai said, pointing at me. "Little explanations about what his missions entail. Usually, these missions have boring names. D-Rank, Pull Weeds. C-Rank, Escort Convoy. Etcetera. But today! Today, this C-Rank mission got a special name!"

He recited my translation of the mission name, The Eyes Have It.

"The last time a mission got a name, Team 13 got themselves trapped in a haunted mansion that spit monsters out of the walls," Gai continued, rubbing his chin with his fingers. "So, in the spirit of support, the Hokage has permitted us to share the C-rank!"

Lee was ecstatic.

Hisako fist pumped. "Yes! This is going to be awesome."

"I know!" Tenten replied with a giant grin of her own.

Nichiren adjusted his glasses. Neji simply sat there, emotionless.

"Our goal is simple," Gai continued. "Find out why this mission warranted such a colorful epithet and put a stop to whatever foul machinations would dare trample on the Springtime of our Youth! Any questions!"

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 6.

I raised my hand.

"Shimoda-kun!" Gai called on me.

"We're stretched too thin to get a proper shinobi team on this, aren't we?" I asked flatly.

Gai immediately looked downcast. "Yes. Yes we are."

"How are we going to explain to the client two Genin teams?" Nichiren piped up. "He only paid for one, didn't he?"

Gai turned to Kakashi.

"We're going to say that the extra protection is courtesy of Konoha," Kakashi explained. "The weapon shipment has to get to where it needs to go and there's been increased bandit traffic on the route. If you can't lie, let the liars talk. Understood?"

Everyone nodded.

"Anyone else?"

No one had any other questions.

"Then that's it," Kakashi said. "Meet us at Konoha's front gate at 0600. Bring three days of traveling supplies, a bedroll and tent. Meeting adjourned.

Quest Updated: The Eyes Have It!

Completed: Optional: Recruit a second Genin Team to provide backup.

Nice.

As the team went off, Anko walked up to me. "Looks like I have the next week or two off."

"Looks like it," I said with a grin. "What're you going to do with all that time?"

"Thinking of purchasing a new tea set," Anko replied. "My old one's starting to break. Maybe when you get back, I can...host a tea ceremony for you?"

"I'd love that," I said, looking into her eyes.

"I'm going to miss you, Daisuke-kun," Anko said with a sad smile.

"I'm going to miss you too," I replied. "Now come on, I gotta go grab some supplies or Kakashi will kill me."

Perception Check Success: 7 / 5.

Hisako had stayed behind to listen, and she was now running back to Konoha at top speed.

...uh oh.

Well, I think I'm going to have to deal with her crush on this mission, aren't I?
* * *​

Author's Note: In the previous draft of the story, this quest was called 'The Organ Trail' as I hadn't quite figured out what the main conflict or McGuffin of the quest was supposed to be until the second chapter of that quest. Here, since I know ahead of time what's going on, I can give it a more appropriate name, The Eye's Have It.

Also in the previous draft, I only wrote Lee and Gai once or twice. Writing them here, again, I realized why: I have such a hard time getting Lee and Gai's voice right. They're so eccentric that I have to twist my brain in an uncomfortable fashion just to fathom them. Lee and Gai are difficult for me to write so if they ever come across as OOC, I apologize. I'm trying to avoid turning them into caricatures even though that seems like that's all they are. Sincere caricatures, but caricatures.

Finally, there's the Anko shipping. I realize that Daisuke and Anko are moving somewhat fast. I'm trying to have their relationship grow organically, and I think it would be fairly quick because I feel that Daisuke and Anko have exactly what the other is looking for in a romantic partner. Daisuke is non-judgmental and is willing to hear her. Daisuke needs someone he can bounce ideas off of without being made to feel like he's crazy for having them.

If you're getting sick of the shipping, I plan for her to appear in the next chapter only briefly during the beginning before we have the next few chapters dedicated to Team 13 and Team 9's dynamic.

Thank you all for being so welcoming as I returned to writing. I admit that I was a little nervous people would be throwing my hesitance to write back in my face, but that wasn't the case. I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter.

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Omake: Darkama - Hotsprings with a Tattoo
A tattoo would be a situational boost, since there are people that love tattoos to death, and those that thing tattoos are grotesque. Me, it depends on the ink.
Hah! I can see that causing some very confusing result:

"Wow, that guy looks hideous, like someone slapped people colored paint on an amateur's statue."

"Are you blind?! He's the most gorgious man I have ever seen!"

"...are you two listening to yourselves, it just looks like a naked teenager to me... why are we looking a naked teenager anyways... is it a genutsu?!"

"What the hell is with these charisma rolls 1/10 Fail, 10/1 Success 5/5 success? I just want to enjoy the hotsprings damn it."
 
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Omake: Darkama - Anko's Board to Death
However, if you've got an Omake idea, there's a threadmark in it for you.

Anko was a board. That wasn't just a mistake or a turn of phrase. Sure she was bored, but... no, right now she was more than that. She was a board.

Frankly, it was a miracle it hadn't happened sooner considering the place she frequented on missions. Plenty of different opportunities to imitate wood planks, whether it be bamboo, pine, or mahogany. It just hadn't occurred to her until today. Sure the first half of the missions had gone well it a bit of a hair-pulling exercise but nowhere near as bad as tonight.

It wouldn't have even occurred to her if it wasn't for her observing That Girl and him being way too nice in her regard.

Following Daisuke, watching Daisuke, and not interfering for a week had been wearing on her sanity. Gai and Lee's exuberance was the start. Kakashi's lack of emotion made it worse. Watching Daisuke take on the bandits had been quite interesting. But it was afterward that drove her off onto the metaphorical plank.

He had to be nice.

Daisuke was nice to that ironing board-chested girl as he drank her tea respectfully. Drank it while politely fighting off the advances of that idea stealing saw dust-brained Hisako.

Briefly (just briefly!) she had wanted that girl to have poisoned him with rue or something just so she would have an excuse to interfere. But no the girl wasn't a yandere, so Anko just had to watch and mull over how to one-up that log of a kunoichi.

Everyone has a moment of weakness, and that was Anko's. It gave her motivation though.

Brushing up on her tea ceremony skills was going to have to take up a lot of her time now. Maybe even one or two kage bunshin to assist. Her usual just wouldn't cut it.

The only upside was she could read Icha Icha Paradise from over Kakashi's shoulder. Even if it was a re-read.

But every now and then her mission would take precedence.

After scaring the third green-clad noble half to death, Anko decided to try another tactic. Henge no jutsu sure was useful but it was times like these that she really, really, really hated its utility and flexibility.

First, it was taking on the log-chan's form. It made seducing the second green clad man she had found easy. Then it was taking on the form of a log... to roll her way stealthy in watch of the fourth green adorned fellow. Now? Now this situation took the cake or foot as the case may be.

Which was why she was now a bored floorboard in a pub tracking down the latest lead of another green-wearing individual. Though unfortunately, it was looking like it was another bust.

Only this time enui was denied to her from the pressure on her back and being forced to watch her target.

Just some insane drunk who kept claiming he was a literal god of death. For the last ten minutes, he had spent his time throwing back cheap shots of sake and building a hideously huge chain reacting puzzle made of chopsticks, shot glasses, and various other objects from around the pub.

He had guaranteed it would kill someone with its awesomeness.

How that was possible Anko couldn't see it. Not a single pointy object was used in its construction. In fact, the only redeeming attribute of either the contraption or the man was that it driving the foreign perv who was standing on top of her nuts. He kept muttering about mob spawn entity limits and it interfering with 'Console' whatever it was.

Frankly, the only person dying tonight was Anko. If only she had an excuse to interfere, then, perhaps she wouldn't have been board to death.

A/N
Badum tish! Okay not that funny but someone did practically dare me to write an omake.
 
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Chapter 13: The Eyes Have It! - Rivalries
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *

Fuinjutsu: 69 / 100.

It took me until 3:43 this morning to finish Anko's book. Sadly, the book only increased my skill points by four, even though the notes she left in the margins should be enough for a skill book in of themselves.

Maybe if I read it again?

Nah, skill books don't work that way.

I gingerly set the book on my nightstand, making sure that no part of it was damaged. Beyond the skill increases, it was exactly the information I needed to start theory crafting my stat-enhancing chakra therapies.

This book was perfect for what I needed and that...well, I can hardly believe my luck.

I made sure to place the Chakra Control manuals in a separate storage scroll. I was going to read them on the mission since, you know, I didn't need sleep. Lots of benefits when your brain didn't start shutting down from literature overload.

With that done, I was ready for my mission. I opened my front door and saw Anko standing there, hand raised in order to knock.

She and I looked at each other in surprise.

I smiled. "Hey, you're up early."

"Had to come see you off," Anko said, a small smile gracing her face. "May I come in?"

"Sure," I replied, stepping aside and gesturing inside. I thought about saying 'mi casa su casa' but she wouldn't have got it. "Come on in."

"Thanks," Anko said, entering my abode. "I'll be quick since you need to head out soon. I had a going away present for you."

I stopped for just a second.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

She's...not talking about something material, is she?

I turned to face her and her smile had turned a little...devious. "Close your eyes."

Oh, I think I know what she's doing so...I played along.

After my eyes shut, I felt a soft pair of lips press firmly against mine. For a moment, I held my breath, the blood rushing straight to my face as her fingers snaked through my hair to hold me closer. When she broke off, I'm sure I would've been mistaken for a tomato.

...that was amazing.

Anko's half-lidded eyes looked into mine and her smile eased to one of contentment. "You stay safe and there's more of that waiting for you when you come home."

"Oh, I will be back," I said, adopting a rakish grin as I looked back at those amazing lips.

She hummed in excitement, standing back up to full height...our height difference wasn't that great, just a couple inches since I was very tall for my age compared to everyone else in the Elemental Nations.

"We should, ah," Anko said, not moving from her spot in front of me, still looking into my eyes. "We should get going."

"We should," I agreed. Her eyes were like a pair of polished lavender stones. Like some in Konoha, they didn't have pupils and for some, that might be unnerving but here? I could just look in them all day.

Anko's face was starting to grow pink and her smile took on a bashful tone.

Chakra: 80 / 85.

I wrapped chakra strings around her back and pulled her to me, bending her head so her lips met mine again. She offered no resistance. In fact, she wrapped her arms around my back and used a pair of boa constrictors to complete her hold. Our lips pressed together, doing a tango of breathe and passion. My hands traveled from her wrists, up her arms and around her back as I finally was able to touch this vision of perfection that had been taunting me since the day we met. Her hands went to my legs, rubbing my inner and outer thighs in a near taunt in our passionate, iron-clad embrace.

My tongue rubbed against her teeth, demanding entry. Her mouth opened and her tongue raced to meet mine. The bitter yet sweet taste of her mouth drove me crazier, making my hands grip her shoulder and back tightly, respectively. A moan of pleasure escaped her mouth. She disconnected and I kissed her neck briefly before coming up for air myself.

She was breathing as heavily as I was, all smiles. "I haven't done that in so long."

"You could've fooled me," I replied, arching an eyebrow in playful fascination.

She giggled and let out a contented sigh. Then her expression shifted to one of slight worry, making me wonder what on Earth could be wrong that she's worried and how I could fix it. "Listen, uh...this is as far as I want to go. N-not because I don't want to keep going, but-"

"Say no more," I said, unwrapping my strings from around her back and moving them around to open the door. "I gotcha."

"Thanks." She let out a sigh of relief. "As long as we don't, uh...go any further than that? We can do as much as you like."

Perception Check Success: 7 / 7.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

The unspoken part of that is as long as I keep being as helpful and considerate as I have been. Because this is the first time in a very long while that she's felt romanced enough for her physical needs to come out in force.

I smiled. "Certainly! Now if you'd do me a favor?"

Anko nodded and paid rapt attention.

"Keep being appreciative when I do things for you?" I asked with a smile of my own. "I live for that smile of yours. It makes it so easy to be helpful, you know?"

"Oh," Anko replied, nodding and cupping her chin. "Yeah, I can do that. Absolutely. Remind me from time to time, okay?"

"Happily," I said, pulling the door open with my strings. "After you?"

She gave a small laugh and pulled ahead of me...then fell into lockstep behind me as her professionalism took over and she became my bodyguard again.
* * *
I was the first one at the meeting spot, which was odd, given how I was delayed. Well, I say first one, but the Carriage driver was here first, though he was napping, his chin resting on his chest. Fat man, overweight and snored very loudly. He wore a long coat like Anko's but instead of transparent mesh, thankfully, he just wore a t-shirt and cargo pants.

Perception Check Failed: 7 / 10.

So what did I miss? His beard is a little greasy and gnarly? The straw hat on his head almost perfectly covers his bald spot? That aside from that spot he had a mullet going down past his shoulders? The bandages wrapped all on his arms and hooking over his thumbs like he had been mummified?

...no?

Alright, fine.

Why does he even get 10 Perception check anyway?

He was sitting in the drivers seat of the wagon which was pulled by a team of oxen. The wagon was filled to the brim with crates with no spare seats for any of us; we would definitely be walking for the trip. The oxen didn't really smell, as far as I could tell, which I was surprised by. I don't know, I just always thought large animals like that smelled badly. They were looking around like they were bored, but they were too well trained to start doing something like wander off.

Quest Updated: The Eyes Have It!

Completed: Rendezvous with the wagon driver.

Wait for the rest of your group.

"Daisuke-kun!" I looked up and saw Hisako running up to me. She was accompanied by Nichiren and they both were carrying a pair of large storage scrolls on the back of their belt.

"Hey, Hisako. Nichiren," I said with a grin. "Now we just got to wait for Sensei and then Team 9…"

It was at that second that team 9 rounded the corner. Gai and Lee were talking animatedly. Tenten was rubbing one of her tired eyes and Neji looked as robotic as ever. Like me without my charisma boosts except he actually looks human.

Lucky...

"Hey you three!" Gai greeted with this gigantic smile on his face.

We returned his greeting with a formal bow. Team 9 similarly bowed to us and we started mingling.

"I guess we're just waiting for Kakashi?" Gai asked, keeping his voice surprisingly low given the early hour.

We all nodded.

"Mitarashi-san," Gai took notice of my bodyguard with a respectful bow. "Burning the midnight oil, aren't we?"

"Well, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything happened to my charge," Anko replied with a smile and bow of her own. "Besides, I couldn't just let him head off without saying goodbye."

And what a goodbye it was.

Perception Check Success: 7 / 5.

Hisako got really still, with an angry glare at the ground as her fingers clenched around her arms tight enough to turn white. In mid conversation with her, Tenten looked at her in confusion, then in enlightened sympathy.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

She is trying really hard to not attack Anko, verbally and physically. This is the first time I've seen her this aggravated besides when I graduated early and she didn't think she'd ever see me again and she's been nursing this crush for a long time, hasn't she?

Well shoot!

I...huh.

How to handle this?

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 6.

Well, I mean, Anko kind of pointed out that I didn't necessarily need to reject her yesterday. It'd be a really hard thing for all involved and I'd need to handle it delicately to make sure she wasn't miserable but...huh.

Need to think about it.

"Kakashi-sensei," Nichiren greeted our eternally late instructor. Everyone bowed as normal.

"Hey everyone," Kakashi replied with an eye smile. "Sorry I'm late, my alarm clock's battery came loose and I overslept."

Hisako groaned.

"Well, now that everyone is here, I feel like I can let you go," Anko said, looking at me with a smile. She gave me a hug I eagerly returned. "Stay safe, okay?"

"Always," I replied.

After we separated, she started walking off, but it was weird. It was almost like she was dancing. Walking a one woman waltz, her hips gently swayed to imaginary music. I mean, I hoped she enjoyed our time together, but I didn't think she liked it that much.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

Then again, if what she said about not kissing in 'many years' was literal, perhaps any kind of affection was going to put her on cloud nine.

"So," Kakashi-sensei pulled me from my thoughts. "Are we all ready to go?"

"Yosh!" Gai replied with a grin and thumbs up. "We just got to wake up the carriage driver and our C-rank can begin!"

Quest Updated: The Eyes Have It!

Completed: Wait for the rest of your group.

Escort the wagon on it's route to the border. (0 / 4).

What do you know, Gai was standing right next to the driver, so he just reached up and tapped the guy on the thigh. He woke up with a start, scratching his side and yawning. "Oh...s-sorry about that. I had a late last night. You're all…here."

The driver looked over all of us in surprise. "That's weird. I thought we only paid for one team?"

"Konoha's providing an extra one free of charge," Kakashi explained easily. "There's a shipment of weapons in your cart and there's been an increase in bandit attacks on the road to grass."

"Oh, really?" The driver asked, clearing his throat with a cough. "Well, alright. I feel safer already! We all ready to move?"

The large group gave their assent and he snapped the reins, starting the team on a slow trod forward.
* * *​

The trip was slow, but it was a peaceful slow. Kakashi and Gai brought up the rear on either side of the wagon. In the front, Lee and I both walked next to the drivers seat. Behind me, I could feel Neji's eyes burning holes in the back of my skull and behind him, Nichiren was reading a book, that he'd occasionally look up from the scan his surroundings.

On Lee's side, Tenten and Hisako were talking.

"But there's more poem types than Haiku," Hisako said, having just finished up a rousing lecture on Haiku and how it grew from simply describing the seasons and the changing thereof. Or something. On another occasion, I'm sure it would be interesting, but I really just wanted to take in the sights of the trail since this was the first time I've ever left the village since my birth. "Concrete poems, for instance. Designed to take a shape on a page, like a lantern or a kunai."

Tenten hummed in pure fascination. Then she gasped. "It's a blue bird!"

"Oh it's so pretty!" Hisako snapped from her focus of her subject of choice to mutually admire the bird as it flew through the trees and over the road ahead.

"Anyway, your family owns a weapon shop?" Hisako asked with clear interest. "That's where I got my kunai. I never throw these things, though, so I'm thinking of changing them out for something for suited for melee though."

"You might consider a set of trench knives," Tenten started. "Kunai are great mostly because of how disposable they are. They work but they chip kind of easily and are usually made with cheap steel just because they're meant to be carried into battle by the dozen."

"Wait, really?" Hisako asked. "I haven't noticed any chipping in mine."

"That means you take good care of yours," Tenten replied, sounding impressed. "But it'll happen sooner or later. Trench knives are made with a higher quality of steel, which means they're harder to damage and easier to take care of."

They continued along that conversation thread as effortlessly as they pursued the first conversation about poetry and demonstrated a yet unseen skill to talk about anything. And everything!

Maybe it's just my patience wearing thin, but I was hoping to see the sights and commune with nature or something since this was the first time I've ever set foot outside of the village since I reincarnated.

"Anyway, I've been considering improving my marksmanship," Hisako started a new thread. "Sensei taught us all a lightning jutsu, but I'd rather have something steel, you know?"

"How's that lightning jutsu coming, Hisako-chan?" Kakashi-sensei asked from the back.

I could tell Hisako jumped. "Uh...It's coming! I guess."

"You still can't do it?" Kakashi surmised flatly.

"I still can't do it," Hisako admitted in shame.

"We'll have to see to training it when we get back to the village," Kakashi said with what I assumed was an eye smile.

"Must be a really tough jutsu, huh?" Tenten asked, her voice lower.

"No, I'm just not that good at Ninjutsu," Hisako replied flatly. "Working on it, though."

Our trip continued much like that. Honestly, I was surprised by how quiet Lee and Gai were, but then that was just a testament to their discipline and how little credit I gave them on first impression.

Everyone made sure to drink a gulp of water every five minutes. Well, everyone except me. I kind of just forgot since thirst was a thing of the past and so was hunger. Catching Gai eyeing me oddly was what reminded me to take a swig just to placate him.

When the sun hung at high noon, the carriage was pulled off to a grassy knoll carved into the hillside and stopped.

"Why are we stopping?" Kakashi asked.

"Lunch time," The driver replied, whose name I still didn't have. I mean, it was in the mission briefing but I haven't read the briefing because Sensei had it. Details like that got glossed over when it turned out my mission had a name. "I'm gonna go take a leak. And a smoke. Away from all the feminine conversation."

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

Hisako and Tenten looked really irritated, because that meant they couldn't hold a simple conversation without annoying anyone. They were also embarrassed, because they hadn't meant to annoy anyone, they were just holding a conversation.

A really long one.

"I advise against wandering off into the woods," Kakashi said. "Bandits are really bad this time of year."

"I'm not going far," The driver said without even trying to care. "If I'm not back in an hour, you can say you told me so in the Pure World."

I found myself liking the man in spite of myself. But why is he so lackadaisical?

Kakashi sighed. "Fine."

He disappeared behind a tree and Kakashi started walking forward. "I'm going to tail him. Gai, if you'd keep watch for me?"

"You got it, Kakashi!" Gai beamed.

Kakashi bolted off faster than I could see and Gai turned to us. "Alright! I noticed that everyone kept a watchful eye out for anyone trying to sneak up on our wagon here, even Hisako-chan and Tenten-chan, who kept careful eye even while they were talking!"

Tenten scratched the back of her head with an embarrassed smile. "Thanks, Sensei."

"Now, lunch time!" Gai said, pumping his fist. "It is essential that we get all the proper nutrients in our bodies to fuel our youthful fires so we can see this mission through so eat!"

"Yosh!" Lee shouted enthusiastically. "After lunch, can we do some training, Gai-sensei?"

"Lee, the fires of your youth burn so brightly, it brings tears to this grown man," Gai replied, actually crying. "But no! Lee, we are on a mission, which means we cannot exhaust ourselves improving ourselves. Trying to do two things at once will leave us unable to accomplish either."

Lee was heartbroken. But he nodded. "Yes, Gai-sensei! I swear I'll put my utmost effort into completing this mission to perfection!"

"Then you must eat! Your! Lunch!" Gai instructed so sincerely, it sounded like he was still giving a motivational speech.

I will not laugh.

I will not laugh.

I will...not…

Endurance Check Success: 5 / 4.

Okay, the urge to laugh is gone. Whew!

I sat down and pulled some sushi rolls out of a storage scroll. After inhaling the rice-rolls, I stretched. Honestly, now would be a good time to use the wait command to get back to the mission asap for me. Hisako and Nichiren were chatting up Team 9, so it should be…

…fine?

You cannot wait while enemies are nearby.

I'm sorry?

I narrowed my eyes in spite of myself. I looked around, at the tree line, at the hill behind us. Down where the carriage driver and Kakashi had walked down.

You cannot wait while enemies are nearby.

Well, that's not good.

I stood up and leaned against the wagon. The sound of the oxen kicking at the grass to my right seemed really loud for some reason, even as the conversations of my fellow Genin seemed to get tuned out.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

I need to tell everyone we've got company. Obviously.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 10.

But the issue is that these enemies might not even be attacking us. They could just be hostile wild-life that doesn't know we exist. No lakes around so it's not like we're dealing with Tamriel's Slaughter Fish. The last thing I need is to get everyone riled up over nothing because of a random text prompt that didn't even update my quest. Especially since Neji's been making periodic sweeps with his Byakugan.

So the solution is to keep watch.

"Uh...Daisuke-kun?" Hisako asked, sounding concerned. "Is something wrong?"

"Just keeping watch," I said, trying to smile. "Something's bound to happen sooner or later, right?"

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

Speech Check Success: 36 / 25.

"Well, if you're sure," Hisako said. "Just let us know if something goes wrong, alright?"

"You got it, Hisako-chan," I replied with a more genuine smile, thankful that even though she noticed that I didn't deny that something was wrong, she didn't press me on it.

I tried waiting two more times while the other Genin finished up their lunch and started socializing. Both times, I was denied due to the presence of enemies. But Neji would've seen something, wouldn't he have? Especially with the sweep he did just now?

Really, confused here.

Which makes me nervous.

Which is making my team nervous.

Which is making Team 9 nervous.

"Shimoda-kun, is everything okay?" Gai asked warmly. "You seem nervous."

"It's probably nothing," I said, not taking my eyes off of the treeline. "Especially since Hyuuga's been diligent with his sweeps."

Almost on cue, Neji did another sweep.

"Are you sure?" Gai asked.

"Positive," I replied.

"I do not see anything, Sensei," Neji added. "Only Kakashi-sensei and the Driver."

Wait.

The driver.

He's the only one of us that isn't above suspicion, isn't he? But even then, why would he be setting off my enemy alarms? He isn't hostile, is he? That's typically how this thing goes in Bethesda Fallout's; you can't sleep when hostile, murderous NPC's are next to you because obviously. But Brutus wouldn't have stopped Julius Caesar from taking a nap until it was time for the assassination.

So maybe it's not him.

But then what's going on here?

Does Neji want to kill me for making a fool of him during the training exercise?

...

Wait, that almost makes sense.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 2.

Except no it doesn't, that's dumb.

Then...the Driver? Is he just biding his time? I mean, if there's anything that the armed insurrection taught me is that Konoha's got enough holes in it's security that they could easily let some kind of infiltrator in and coming as a client would be the perfect cover.

But would that stop me from passing the time with a wait command?

I don't feel like it should.

So now I'm back to square one.

"Good work, Neji-kun!" Gai said with a shining smile.

"Though I think it'd be a good idea if we all talked when we get to our first checkpoint," I let him know. "You know, while Kakashi-sensei is here and I don't have to repeat myself."

"Gotcha," Gai nodded firmly. "Say no more, I understand completely."

"Thanks, Gai-sensei," I replied.

Eventually, Kakashi returned and Gai...hurriedly passed him a note I didn't even see him write and they exchanged nods. A moment later, the driver pulled himself out from the trees, smelling of smoke and tobacco. "Alright, that's my business all taken care of. You all ready to go?"

There were nods of assent and we continued on.
* * *
Quest Updated: The Eyes Have It!

Escort the wagon on it's route to the border. (1 / 4).
We finally came to our first stop near sundown, a small town with high walls. There was a three-story motel that we checked into as a unit once we had overseen the wagon's internment in a warehouse owned by Soma Shipping.

One of the interesting things was that I noticed one of the crates was marked along the bottom by a seal, which Kakashi explained to me as being a security seal; that was the crate that contained the weapon shipment and those seals would prevent the crate from being moved by anyone aside from authorized personnel and I really wanted to get a closer look at that seal to see what I could learn from it.

We were all crowded into an apartment room and everyone was looking at me expectantly.

"So, we all know about my premonition," I began, not entirely sure how to talk about this without sounding crazy. But then, I've got some credentials from Nevermore, so maybe I can be a bit straighter. "There are other times when I get them."

"Like when?" Nichiren asked.

"Like when I try to go to sleep," I answered flatly. "Or when I try to zone out to pass the time, or 'waiting' as I call it. There's few things that stop me from doing either of those things. One of those being the presence of enemies."

Neji's eyes narrowed. "But I didn't see anything on our journey here."

"I know, and that's why I was confused." I took a deep breath. "...you don't want to kill me, do you?"

Neji arched an eyebrow. "No, Shimoda. I do not."

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 2.

"Yeah, I didn't think so," I replied with a nod. "Sorry, I thought that idea was dumb, but I had to ask. So that leaves us with the carriage driver, but then I'm still confused."

"Why are you confused?" Kakashi asked, his eye narrowed.

"Because he's not outwardly hostile," I explained. "That's the weird part. Unless he's actively acting on a desire to harm me or is otherwise actively antagonizing me, it shouldn't stop me from taking a nap. That's why I didn't want to bother anyone with this, because I didn't understand the situation."

Everyone was quiet for a minute as they processed this information.

"...how, exactly, do you know that?" Kakashi asked, looking confused.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 3.

I blinked. "Uh...last time this became a problem was the Kyuubi attack."

Kakashi gave a nod. "Understood. If we're act on the assumption that Arai is an enemy, we'll need to do some quick investigation. Gai, how suited are your team for stealth operations?"

Wait, Arai? Arai's the driver. Okay, glad the one person who actually read the mission brief could give us this minor detail.

"They're quick and quiet," Gai affirmed with a nod. "We can find and tail Arai. Yours?"

Sneak Check Failed: 17 / 25.

Wait, since when would a Sneak check happen now? I'm not sneaking!

"Daisuke has lead feet," Kakashi replied pointedly, offending me greatly. "Stealth is his worst skill. He'll be staying here."

Hey, I strenuously object to that accusation!

Melee Weapons is my worst skill, not Sneak. By Two! Whole! Points!

"Ah! Then in the spirit of camaraderie, Lee shall stay here with him!" Gai said.

Lee saluted. "I won't let you down, Gai-Sensei! I shall keep Shimoda company!"

"...you guys can just call me Daisuke," I said, trying not to sound exasperated.

"Yosh!" Lee gave me a thumbs up and a smile that didn't quite sparkle the way his Sensei's did.

Everyone turned to get started on their tasks, but then quickly turned to me.

I arched my eyebrow. "No, there was no update to the Mission."

"Just checking," Kakashi said.
* * *
So while the rest of my team went to go have fun and perform the mission to the best of their considerable abilities, Lee and I were left in the apartment. He had brought a deck of cards, so we were playing go fish.

"Do you have any twos?" Lee asked, six cards in his hand.

Quietly, I handed him my single two.

"Yosh!" Lee grinned, placing the completed set down on the ground in front of us.

"If you don't mind me asking Lee," I started. "Why did you become a mini-Gai?"

"Gai-sensei has become an inspiration to me in the short while that I've been a Ninja," Lee answered, his eyes sparkling happily. "He has encouraged me and believed in me when no one else did. He has called me a genius of hard work and I am proud to be his student!"

"Sounds like you admire him a great deal," I said with a smile.

"He is the best sensei ever and I will always strive to be worthy of the faith he has placed in me," Lee said with an enthusiastic grin. "I will defeat all obstacles and become a splendid Ninja!"

"Well, I mean, you're already splendid," I pointed out. And he was! A little extreme and enthusiastic, but you can't argue with the guys heart.

"Thank you, Daisuke," Lee replied, looking positively ecstatic. "That means a lot, coming from a Shinobi such as yourself."

"I'm nothing special," I said with a shrug. "Just overly specialized."

"How can you say that?" Lee asked, aghast. "You closed one of Neji's tenketsu without the Byakugan! Something I didn't even think was possible!"

"As a result of my overspecialization on Taijutsu," I pointed out. "But beating him isn't that hard. I imagine you've done it several times."

He blinked and looked somewhat ashamed. "No, I must confess that I've never beat him."

"Really?" I asked, confused.



Oh, right. That was a thing in the anime. I don't understand how it's possible for Lee to have never beaten Neji but...that's true.

"Yes, it's true," Lee said, acting like I had just brought up something he regret severely. "I have never beaten Neji. But one day, through training and hard work, I will surpass him in Taijutsu and then I will truly have earned the title of splendid ninja."

I frowned. "Okay, but there's just one thing wrong with that."

"Daisuke, please do not tell me that it is hopeless..."

"I wasn't going to say that."

"...or that hard work simply cannot match talent..."

"I wasn't going to say that either."

"...because I will not accept anything but the constant drive to improve!"

"Admirable. You'll go very far with an attitude like that. But seriously…"

Lee sighed. "Very well. Say what you were going to say."

"You're already better than Neji."

He braced himself like he was preparing an insult. But my words shook him and he looked at me like I had grown a second head. "Excuse me? I'm sorry, I don't think I heard you properly."

"You heard what I said," I flatly reprimanded. "You're already better than Neji. Even with those training weights of yours. I watched you fight and I watched him. You're faster, stronger and more tactically efficient with your moves than he is."

"I'm sorry, Daisuke. While I appreciate the kind words," Lee started, smiling but looking hurt all the same. "I cannot condone flattery, especially when it is so clearly untrue. If I were better than him, I would've beaten him before now."

"Well, I wasn't done," I cut in, annoyed at being interrupted again. "If you haven't beat Neji, then it's because you keep screwing up somehow. Likely a small mistake that's easily corrected. You mainly focused on the Strong Style, right?"

"That's right," Lee said, looking unsure of my words.

I stood up. "Come on, get into your stance."

"Gai-Sensei has instructed that we not train on a mission," Lee protested with a frown.

"We're not actually sparring," I said, sighing in irritation. "I refuse to spar with you while you've got those weights on. No, I'm just checking something. Come on, get into your stance."

Reluctantly, he obliged me, settling into a loose horse stance.

"Excellent. Now, pretend I'm Neji and do what you'd normally do when we're sparring," I said, settling into a mimicry of Neji's Gentle Fist stance.

Taijutsu Check Success: 80 / 75.

Lee's eyes widened slightly and I could see the muscles beneath his spandex tighten with anticipation. Or dread. I threw a strike forward and he blocked it with his forearm.

"Found the problem," I said, relaxing my stance. I sat right back down.

Lee blinked in disbelief. "Wha – just like that?"

"Just like that," I confirmed, nodding. "Sit down."

"So what's the problem?" Lee asked, almost sounding anticipatory.

"You can't block the Gentle Fist," I replied. "Neji doesn't rely on strong hits or breaking bones or whatever, he only needs to touch you. When you block and parry, all you're doing is giving him what he wants; physical contact with the tenketsu in your arms. If you want to defend against the Gentle Fist, there is only one sure way to do it."

Lee's eyes got wide. "To dodge."

"Precisely," I said. "Dodge and counter attack. That's how you win."

Imagine for a moment that Lee was a video game boss with a pulsating, glowing weak point. A great, green beast with an exposed heart, if you will. Neji would be the MC of this hypothetical game. Lee blocked Neji's attacks would be the equivalent of fighting this video game main character without once ever covering his exposed heart.

A bad idea.

Lee was quiet. His hands were shaking slightly and his breathing got deeper. "That's how you won. You used dodging to prolong the fight until you could reverse engineer the Gentle Fist. You did the one thing I didn't know how to do. Neji...the key to defeating him was in front of me the entire time."

"The smallest thing can bring a giant to their knees," I said with a smirk. "Glad I could help. But don't think you'll just beat him automatically, he is good. You'd need to train dodging."

"How do you recommend I train dodging?" Lee asked, his eyes on fire.

"Well, there's more Taijutsu Styles than just Strong Fist," I replied with a shrug. "For dodging? There's the Serpent Style, the Bamboo Reed Style...and the Drunken Fist."

That last one seems extremely appropriate, now that I think about it.

"Right," Lee sounded like his mind had been blown. "What about your style?"

"I don't really...have a style," I said, shrugged. "At least, not one that I can certainly call a style. I haven't set any kata or written any books on it. But if you wanted to fight like me, you'd need to master Tree Walking and have a good grasp of Water Walking."

Lee looked downcast for just a moment. "Okay. I will talk to Gai-sensei about other styles of Taijutsu. I confess, I hadn't thought of the possibility of training other Taijutsu styles, I just wanted to focus on mastering the Strong Fist."

"The Strong Fist can take a lifetime to master, so that doesn't surprise me," I said without hyperbole or exaggeration. There was a lot of material in the Strong Fist, even with its weaknesses. "Actually, if you're willing to memorize the human body and the position of the tenketsu, you could learn Gentle Fist. Turn the tables on Neji."

Lee laughed, and got a thoughtful expression on his face. "Neji has said that no two person's tenketsu network is the same, so all that would do is give me a general idea of where they are are."

"True enough, but a general idea is all I needed to close his tenketsu," I pointed out. "Besides, there's more to Gentle Fist than just shutting down a chakra system. Just like how there's more to the Strong Fist than breaking bones into splinters. If nothing else, it'll help you devise defenses against him."

Lee blinked. "You're right...you're right! That is true! There is more to the Gentle Fist than shutting down an opponent. I hadn't thought of that!"

"I mean, if you're going to master Taijutsu, you might as well master all of the Taijutsu, am I right?" I asked with a smirk.

Lee nodded. Then, his expression shifted from one of enthusiasm to one of solemnity. "I believe I have made a mistake."

I frowned. "How so?"

"When I was first placed on Gai's team, I had named Neji my rival," Lee intoned, the fire in his eyes having returned. "But this rivalry was one sided. He did not regard me as an opponent or a friend. But I see this is because he is not my rival. Shimoda Daisuke, I officially name you as my rival!"

Oh no.

"So we must challenge each other to see who is the best," Lee demanded, pointing at the ceiling. "So, my eternal rival, you gain the first challenge!"

I hate to do this, but I'd like to come back to Earth now.

"Alright," I said, sitting up straight. Lee looked at me with full anticipation. "I challenge you to finish this game of Go Fish with me."

"What?" Lee looked thunderstruck. "Come on, seriously!"

"A Shinobi should never commit to something he doesn't intend to finish," I replied with a wry smile.

Speech Check Success: 36 / 15.

"Oh, alright," Lee huffed. "Not like we can do a real challenge on a mission like this."

"Precisely. Got any fours?"

He looked at his cards with a new seriousness. A seriousness that bespoke decisions that would decide the course of war. Uproot armies. Annihilate civilizations. Then, slowly, he looked up at me. "Go fish."

Aw…
* * *
Right as Lee won our game, the door opened and everyone that was gone filed in. We stood and bowed to greet them.

"Gai-sensei," Lee said.

"Kakashi-sensei," I said. "How'd it go?"

"The driver did nothing suspicious the entire night," Gai reported enthusiastically. "He went to a bar, drank two bowls of sake, then returned here to sleep off the alcohol."

"It was so boring," Tenten complained. "How was the warehouse?"

"Same," Hisako replied, scrunching up her nose in distaste. "We couldn't find anything in the warehouse records of anything amiss and this Arai guy has worked for them for years. Literally hours of stress for nothing."

"Well, when you put it like that, I'm glad I didn't have to go," I said with a grin.

Hisako gave me a dark look. "And what did you two do all night, play War?"

"Go Fish."

Hisako rubbed her eyes in frustration.

"Uh, not to put too fine a point on it, but we've got an early day tomorrow," Nichiren pointed out. "So if we're done, could we head to bed?"

"I have to agree with Nichiren," Neji interjected. "We need rest."

Well, you need rest. I'm bored.

Kakashi nodded. "Alright, everyone, to bed."
* * *
I wound up sharing a room with Nichiren. A little unfortunate because I wanted to stay up and read and keeping the lights on would keep him up. But nothing was going to stop me from reading my books, so I head to the bathroom our room had, shut the door and turned on the light.

Chakra Control: 96 / 100.

Chakra Control: 100 / 100.

That conversation with Lee was illuminating to me, too. Mostly because I realized something.

The Gentle Fist used chakra in it's fighting style.

Such an obvious statement. Like hur dur, they use chakra when they fight. But it's really profound because the Gentle Fist style of injecting chakra has very little difference with Tsunade's Megaton Punch.

This means that, for as long as I've been a Shinobi, I've been fighting below my capabilities. Sure, my Ninjutsu skill is a barely acceptable 29. But my Taijutsu skill is 80 and there's a whole crap ton of stuff you can do with just Chakra Shaping.

Like...take the Rasengan.

Chakra Control Check Success: 100 / 80.

Chakra: 20 / 85.

This glowing ball of grinding death that I'm holding in my hand? It's just chakra shaping. And honestly, I'm kind of underwhelmed. Not because it isn't an impressive achievement by the Fourth, because it is, but because it wasn't created for someone like me.

The Fourth Hokage's innate Chakra Nature was Wind. I'm Lightning. I'd want is something like the Chidori, but Kakashi-sensei hasn't taught me that yet. Not that I've asked. Not that I'd be able to use it, with my Ninjutsu score being 29.

It's kind of a shame because the Chidori is more than a hand-held lightning spear. It basically straps a rocket to your back and yells Yahoo!, making you move so fast your vision blurs. But if I recall correctly, Kakashi-sensei created the Chidori for the same reason the Rasengan doesn't work for me; he's a Lightning user.

But I've got ingenuity, I've got lightning, and I've got time.

So, Bootleg Chidori!

Chakra: 75 / 85.

Much like the Rasengan, I started by created a chakra loop. The difference is that this loop hovers above my clenched fist and instead of adding more loops, I simply tightened this loop until I came as close to an actual point as I could.

Then I added the lightning chakra.

The sudden noise of the electrical sparks made me stop because I didn't want to wake up Nichiren. Or anyone else on the floor.

Chakra: 85 / 85.

I quietly hummed in thought.

What about, instead of trying to create a bootleg Chidori, especially when I can just ask for the real thing, I just take the techniques I already know and just add Lightning Chakra to them.

Way less complicated than trying to recreate other jutsu.

...I'm just going to sleep now.

With that, I shut off the light and headed to bed.

As I got beneath the covers, I had one last thought before I forced myself to go to sleep.

I wonder what the Megaton Punch looks like when it's been juiced up with lightning?
* * *​

Chakra Control: 100 / 100.
* * *
Author's Note: I think Daisuke's about to accidentally crack Lightning Release Chakra Mode. Not even kidding. From it's description, it's literally just wrapping your body up in Lightning Chakra and honestly, I'm here for it. Can't find any hand-seals for it, so it doesn't trigger a Ninjutsu check even though it is a Ninjutsu and 'you do not know that jutsu' doesn't apply because he isn't trying for a specific jutsu, he's just experimenting.

Still, we'd have to see where it goes.

I hope I did Lee and Daisuke's conversation justice. I just always thought that, even though he was always trying to get stronger through push ups and sit ups, he could've also been exercising his mind through deliberately trying to learn other styles of Tai Jutsu. As Daisuke points out 'why not master all of the Taijutsu'. I mean, he's got the dedication for it.

Last but certainly not least, Daisuke and Anko. Aside from voicing my awareness that they're moving fast, I'm kind of glad they can take a break from each other. Daisuke's about hit that spot where he just plain needs to be left alone so he can feel like himself again. Much as he likes Anko, he needs his Daisuke time.

I believe Hisako and Tenten count as having passed the Bechdel test? Let me see...two girls? Check. Talk to each other? Check. About something other than a man? Check. Also, I hope you appreciate that Hisako starting to grow out of her insecurity about her poems and is starting to talk about it.

Anyway, thank you for reading!

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Informative: Element Chart - prussian-granadier
what is daisukes other nature? he may as well develop a kekkei genkai with it

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if his second nature is fire, like its statistics most likely he would probably get some sort of plasma release, which would be interesting since plasma has way more interesting properties then "be really hot"

it can be used in things like lightsabers, atomic explosions, very precise cutting, plasma can also separate the atoms of things that come in contact with it, making it for a small version of particle style

plasma is also extremely corrosive, which actually make a lot of sense as the opposite fire element is lava style witch accounts for acid jutsu

then there is the combination of both wind and lightning, which I'm calling thunder release since there already is a lightning and storm release

it could be a style focused on the use of atmospheric electricity, with Kirin being one of the principal techniques.

You could also be subtle about it, using static electricity to spy on people like Garaa does with sand, making you the equivalent of a sensor type ninja

it may also give you access to other electromagnetic abilities that aren't available for either magnet release or storm release.

storm release is unlikely due to his aforementioned lack of wind chakra

and explosion style is extremely rare in its natural form, with Diedara's version being a bastardization that required extensive modification to use
 
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Informational - Naruto Power Levels - Numbers.
Behold! The internal rating system I use to rank Daisuke's abilities; bask in their numerical glory!

Genin - Levels 1 - 10, Skills 0 - 20.

Chunin - Levels 11 - 20, Skills 21 - 40.

Jounin - levels 21 - 30, Skills 41 - 60.

Kage - levels 31 - 40, Skills 61 - 80.

Chosen Ones - Levels 41 - 50, Skills 81 - 100.

So his Chakra Control is Chosen One, Taijutsu is upper Kage and everything else is around Chunin.

Except for stealth.

That is solidly upper Genin, which is pathetic compared to Nichiren and Hisako who are both phenomenally talented at it.

That, and Kakashi had high standards for Infiltration.
 
Informative: Age of Consent in Konoha is Wonky.
Anyone else slightly disturbed by the fact that Anko is showing such interest in Daisuke when he isnt even a late teen yet? Correct me, if I'm wrong, but he's like 13-15 right?

To reiterate what has already been said.

In the elemental nations, legal adult is Genin. Back in feudal japan, which Naruto is heavily based on, people got married and had kids as early as twelve. You won't find this sort of thing in the manga itself, for obvious reasons, but it is logical that it'd be there, especially with the constant wars whittling the global populations down.

In real life, my go two example is Ghandi, who got married at 13. Also in real life, the age of consent around the world fluctuates. In Sweden, for instance, it's fifteen. In Japan, the much more topical area, it's 13. Granted, it's thirteen on the US equivalent of the Federal Level. In the individual prefectures, however, it's different. Tokyo has a limit of 18 but in others, and both of Japan's Territories (Okinatori Islands and Marcus Islands) it's 13. Yeah.

As for real life anecdote, I have heard of a 12 year old having a child in passing. I have not met this girl, but I heard about it from someone I trust.

Disclaimer: I do not condone relationships with minors in real life. My own sisters, who are minors, constantly broadcast through their behavior that they are not ready for any such relationship and any man who comes near them will be summarily executed. This is fiction. Fiction taking inspiration from history, but fiction nonetheless. Relationships with adults are more fun anyway and, if you really need some motivation, there are no laws against having a relationship with a person of adult age whereas a relationship with a minor will get you imprisoned and then murdered.

Thank you for coming to my Ted-talk.

EDIT: My Sauce.
 
Chapter 14: The Eyes Have it! - Violence
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

* * *
You cannot wait while enemies are nearby.

It's the driver.

I can't think of anything else.

It's the wagon driver, snapping the reins of the oxen driving this cart.

Which begs the question, why is someone hostile to me driving a wagon escorted by my team?

Why is it stopping me even though he's not attacking me right now?

This is going to drive me crazy.

Hisako walked up next to me. "Still can't do your thing, Daisuke-kun?"

"Nope," I replied, aggravated. I dropped my voice low. "...you didn't happen upon anything about the driver while you were out and about, did you?"

Hisako shook her head. "We looked. He checks out. Maybe you're just being paranoid?"

That's not how this works! "Thanks."

She blinked and her face got red. "Th-that's not what I meant! Maybe, uh, maybe your just a little sick or something! A bug! Yeah, that's it."

She has no idea that her suggestion actually works on multiple levels. Doesn't have a clue. Still… "Sure, a bug. It's possible, I guess."

"Well, I hope you get over it soon," Hisako replied sheepishly. "So...uh, oh. The front of our formation's a bit exposed, I'm going to cover it."

She hung her head and speed-walked to the front corner of the wagon.

Well, that's unfortunate. But I am desperately hoping that she's wrong because if I've run into a bug, I am going to go paranoid. What if once I've hit 10 Charisma, it winds up flipping back to 1 Charisma because I tried turning a page and changing one of the settings at the same time? What if I clipped through the terrain? What if my Hitpoints are permanently set to infinity because I accidentally dropped my book in water?

...wait, that last one would be a good thing, but the point stands! Things could go very, very wrong in lots and lots of different ways. Unfathomably bad.

Whoa, whoa. Hold it, Daisuke. You're making yourself tense for no reason. Think of something relaxing.

Like Anko.



That's not relaxing.

"Daisuke," Lee walked up to me. "I was curious, when we were talking last night, about expanding our tools, you didn't mention anything you'd use."

"You're right," I said with a nod. "I didn't."

"If it's all right with you, I wanted to ask if you had any ideas," Lee said brightly.

"Well," I began. "I was thinking of trying to add Lightning Chakra to my punches. You know, give my enemies a little shock."

"A fantastic idea!" Lee beamed. "But are you sure you can do so without the Lightning Chakra damaging your fists?"

I blinked. "My own chakra can't do that, can it?"

Medicine Check Failed: 27 / 30.

"Ah, it can, Daisuke-kun," Kakashi-sensei piped up from the rear of our convoy. "It's why I created the Chidori. I had failed to introduce lightning chakra to a technique that my own Sensei had given me so...I improvised."

Wait, really?

"Uh...let me test that," I began, bringing my fist up. But before I did that, I turned to the Driver. "I'm going to do some Jutsu. Will that scare the oxen?"

"Nah," Arai shook his head. "We've been around enough Ninja that I don't think you could even startle them."

"Cool," I said, making the same loop I had last night...then I added Lightning Chakra.

Chakra Control Check Success: 100 / 45.

Chakra: 75 / 85.

Right, it's a way simpler construction than the Rasengan.

Ninjutsu Check Failed: 29 / 45.

Well crap!

215 / 235 HP.

They weren't kidding about the self damage either!

I broke the loop immediately and watched as my Chakra Bar refilled.

"Son of a-" I cursed under my breath as I dug a water canteen out of my storage scroll and took a couple gulps.

235 / 235 HP.

Banished the pain, and the burns along my hand, with a few chugs of water. No two ways about it, I'm a blessed man.

"Are you okay, Daisuke-kun?" Kakashi-sensei sounded a bit amused.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 4.

To be fair, I did just learn what he was trying to teach me the hard way and he thought it was funny.

"I'm fine, just a few burns," I replied, putting my canteen back where it belonged. "No big deal."

"What do you mean, just a few burns?" Hisako yelped in alarm, back pedaling to catch up with me. She seized my hand to get a closer look. "That stuff is serious! You could permanently...lose the use...of your...hand?"

No burns on my hand, and she was staring at it trying to find the evidence of damage that simply was not there anymore.

I smirked. "I heal quickly."

"B-but...but...but," Hisako stammered out in confusion. "I mean, I guess, but I thought it was…"

She was cut off by the sound of Kakashi-sensei clearing his throat. He made a slicing motion across his throat and pointed at Arai.

"Yeah, I guess you do," Hisako replied, voice shaking a little. "Anyway...back to the front."

She zipped ahead at a sprint, her face red from embarrassment. She probably thought I was annoyed by her and to be honest, she wasn't wrong. Though to be fair to her, she is concerned about my well being and I could have permanently damaged my hand there if I was, you know, normal.

Just wish she wouldn't worry; her worrying makes me feel guilty and I don't like that.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 7.

Hisako was also anxious because she was trying to figure out a way to get me to dump Anko and date her instead. Feels like the end of days is coming and she's desperately trying to fight it. So long as I showed due respect for her feelings and didn't try to fix them (and by extension, her) she...might be willing to share.

...seriously, the more I think about getting a harem, the more it starts to make sense. But I have to keep the girls and what they want into consideration. When I get back to Konoha, I'll request copies of harem law so I can piece together how to get this to work.

Because there's a way I want to do this and a way transcribed by law, and I want to make sure they're compatible.​

* * *​

"Whoa there," Arai pulled the oxen to a stop. "Nature's calling."

"Again, I have to warn against wandering off into the forest alone," Kakashi-sensei pointed out blandly.

"Yeah, yeah," Arai waved it off, standing up and hopping off the cart. "See you in a few."

He walked off and Kakashi followed after, leaving us behind. Lee started practicing Kata, Gai watched him. Hisako pulled out one of her kunai and started sharpening the blade. Tenten pulled out a kama and started doing the same, and they started chatting again. Neji sat with his legs crossed beneath him in a meditative pose. Nichiren started playing with his ninja wire.

I've got a theory.

The reason I can't Wait right now is because he is doing something hostile. Like a Genjutsu.

"Kai!" I quietly dispelled.

You cannot wait while enemies are nearby.

Wait, I just remembered. Things like slaughterfish in Skyrim or feral ghouls in Fallout would stop you from fast traveling or waiting even if they haven't yet aggro'd. That's my situation here.

That's really annoying.

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

Worst part is that my traveling companions don't necessarily believe me when I say we've got enemies around. Then again, what are they supposed to think? The guy is apparently on the level. I guess I'm just used to NPC's not being hostile until their faction tags are well and truly switched because that is when that stage of the quest has reached the kill the boss part of the plot.

And he is definitely a boss fight waiting to happen. The way he's so sure of himself, wandering into bandit infested woods by himself.

"Arai and Kakashi-sensei are wandering into an ambush," Neji announced, immediately standing. "Fourteen bandits have set up a trap."

Wait, there's fourteen people over there? Why aren't they over here?

Gai-sensei froze and clear his throat. "Kakashi probably has this, but just in case, I will move to assist him. Guard the wagon, we'll be back shortly."

Then he disappeared so fast I had no hope of tracking him.

Now, I've got a question.

Kind of bugging me.

Why is the boss of the mission tagging along on the top of the wagon that we're escorting? What's the plot of the mission? Is there something that's going to happen once we get to the end? A trap? A surprise dungeon, perhaps?

Is there something in the wagon?

"Hey, Hyuuga?" I turned to face bald-eyed Genin. "What exactly is in the crate that's sealed up?"

"It's a weapons shipment," Neji responded immediately, confused that I'd even ask.

"Yeah, but can you see what weapons exactly?" I pressed.

Neji stopped, then activated his Byakugan. "I do not know, it's sealed against my sight."

Wait, what? "Since when is that a thing?"

"The clan has always had such seals," Neji explained, looking at me like I was an airhead. "And when the clan joined the village, we donated them to the First to help preserve the secrets of the village; we didn't want just any Hyuuga with working eyes to glean Village secrets and sell them to our enemies."

"That makes sense," I replied with a nod. "...I wasn't the only person who didn't know that, was I?"

"I had no idea," Hisako immediately piped up.

"I confess I didn't know either," Lee supplied.

"Never even crossed my mind," Nichiren replied.

Tenten just shrugged.

"Okay then," Neji sighed the sigh of being surrounded by fools. "But that is the answer to your question. I do not know."

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 8.

Well, that's not suspicious at all.

Neji perked up. "We have bandits incoming from the wagon's seven o'clock position."

I cracked my knuckles in anticipation. "I'll take point."

Neji glared at me, but didn't say anything as I moved to the front of the group.

"Be careful, Daisuke," Hisako whispered quietly.

Seriously? Have a little faith in me, come on. "I will."

That was when they showed up. Seven, so we were already outnumbered. Stand out members were the giant tank of a man with a round mass that would make an Akimichi hide in shameful inadequacy and an old man wearing a headband over his eyes.

"Hey, look at the shrimp!" the Big One said pointing at us with a deep laugh. "Look at them! Little kids think they're Ninja!"

Excuse you?

"Hey, hey, look at that the yellow guy!" One of the others interjected, pointing at Nichiren with a dopey grin on his face. "He looks like he's going to pee his pants!"

"Focus, everyone," the Blind Man snapped. "We need to get this over with."

"You guys should just leave," I said, offering the olive branch even though I wanted to reduce them to red smears in the dirt. "This doesn't have to get bloody."

They all looked at each other, then busted up laughing, walking forward. "Ohoh! Look at the high and mighty baby, thinking he's so tough."

You are stomping on thin ice, pal.

"Aw, look at 'im though!" The Big One said with a vicious, sadistic smile. "He looks so mad. Like he's gonna cry if his mama doesn't get him a new toy!"

"Just kill the kids while we still can," The Blind Man urged. "When their Sensei's return, we are doomed!"

I pointed at them. "Like I said, I don't want this to turn bloody. But if you call me a kid again, I'll put my fist through you."

Shortest one in the group. Didn't see him at first. Distinctive by a head wrapping that covered one of his eyes. Patchy facial hair and missing teeth. Tanned, olive toned skin. Wide, toothy smile like he was going to do something he knew he wasn't supposed too, but he did it anyway for kicks. "Try it, kid."

I slid on the ground, gathering chakra into my knuckles. Pull back the fist, slide on my knees underneath the tree trunks the Big One called arms as he tried to run interference. Slip in between the raised, defensive arms, make contact with his chest. Keep going through as muscle, bone and sinew liquidated under the force of my blow.

500 / 21,000 EXP to Level 9.

The bandit was gasping, trying to breathe while coughing up blood. His hands trembled as he tried to grab my arm that had pushed through him.

"I warned him!"

Blood provided enough lubricant for the corpse to slide off my limbs. When it hit the ground, it was like a gunshot, signaling the start of the fight.

Slide forward, spin on the balls of my foot and slam a kick into the stomach of another bandit, bisecting him by liquefying his entire mid-section.

1,000 / 21,000 EXP to Level 9.

Two down, five to go.

Behind me, I was shocked to see that Hisako had jumped the biggest guy. She ran up his massive gut, slicing him up as she went with her kunai, jumped off of his head and then threw a kunai right between his eyes, landing on and riding his shoulders down to the ground. At the moment impact, she somersaulted on the ground and rose in a ready stance with the most amazing smile I've ever seen on her.

...you know, I had doubts. I wasn't sure if Hisako and I could really be compatible since, you know, she was kind of young. I was really conflicted about it all, I had a whole thing I was going to think about and decide if a relationship between her and I would even be ethical.

Forget all that.

Hisako's hot.

...and I want her.

"Watch your back!" Nichiren shouted.

I turned to literally watch one of the bandits literally fall into bloody pieces as he was running at me, being diced by Ninja wire.

I turned to Nichiren. "Thanks!"

Then I got back on task.

Neji had stopped the hearts of one of them. Lee did a flip-kick to the last one, sending him up in the air for Tenten to pin in the throat with a kunai.

That just left the blind man.

"So, it's just you," I said, rolling my shoulders.

"Surrender," Neji ordered. "And you'll live."

The Blind man's response was to bite his thumb and smear the blood down his chest. He flew through a series of handseals and whatever insane jutsu he had planned…

"Dynamic Entry!"

…was stopped by the return of Gai and Kakashi-sensei.

Gai kicked the man in the head, sending him to the ground and what I can only assume was breaking his neck.

I took a look at Arai.

Arai didn't even look winded.

Kakashi looked somewhat roughed up. Gai too. But Arai? Arai was perfectly fine.

"See, everything worked out," Arai said, gesturing to us. "Nothing to worry about."

"No more mid-trip bathroom breaks," Kakashi instructed him icily. "This is not going to happen again."

"Alright, alright, calm down," Arai raised his hands in surrender. "I guess I can hold it. Now let's just get going before more show up."

...now back to what I was talking about before Hisako gave me an erection by eliminating a man six times her size, why would a weapon's shipment need seals that protect from the Hyuuga's eyes?

Maybe I'm making something out of nothing, but the only village that I know of that has such dedicated detection measures is Konoha. I could be wrong about that, too, but why would a plain-Jane weapons shipment need that particular kind of protection? Enemy Shinobi are going to jack any wagon a team of Genin are guarding, and two teams have got to be guarding something good.

"So, how was guard duty?" Kakashi asked conversationally, stepping around a bloody chunk left by Nichiren.

"Eh, it would've been fine," I said with a shrug. "But they had to start throwing out insults and I just couldn't let that stand."

"He put his fist through a guy for calling him a kid," Hisako swooned. "It was incredible."

"Thanks," I said with a grin. "Watching you take out that big guy was the greatest thing I've ever seen in my life."

"You really think so?" Hisako beamed with big, doe eyes.

"I do!"

"And of course, my team held their own just as well!" Gai said, beaming.

"Oh yeah, they were invaluable," I agreed. "Neji saw them all coming and Lee and Tenten showed incredible teamwork."

"Yosh!" Lee said, his teeth shining in the sunlight.

"This was a triumph!" Gai shouted with uncontainable pride.

"Kakashi-sensei, I have a question," I said, turning to my mentor.

"What's that, Daisuke-kun?" Kakashi asked with an eye-smile.

"Is it normal for weapon shipments to be sealed up so that the Byakugan can't see what's inside?" I asked pointedly.

Kakashi blinked, and cupped his chin. "No, Daisuke, that isn't normal. Is that the case with ours?"

"Yeah, Neji can't see into it," I reported, pointing at the crate. "To...assuage my own anxiety, I'd like a peek inside."

Kakashi hummed. "Arai, do you have a problem with us performing a surprise inspection on the cargo?"

"Don't care in the least," Arai responded, waving us off. He leaned back in his seat and pushed his straw hat over his face. "Seems like a good time for a nap."

Okay then.

"Gai," Kakashi said. "Let's do an inspection on the cargo. Specifically, the weapons shipment."

"...is something the matter, Kakashi?" Gai asked, blinking owlishly.

"We're just trying to assuage Daisuke's anxiety regarding the trip," Kakashi replied with a shrug. "Plus, I think it'd be a good exercise in showing our students proper procedure."

"Good point, Kakashi!" Gai said. "So, proper inspection of a weapons shipment. First, you lay out a mat for the weapons to rest on. At no point do you want them to touch the ground, we want them to arrive in pristine condition! Tenten, if you please."

She pulled a white mat out of nowhere, because storage scrolls are a thing.

"Now, if you want to open a crate like this, remember, if you do it wrong, you will set off alarms back in Konoha," Gai continued, pulling the crate out so it was free of it's neighbors. "So you focus chakra in specified points to disable the alarms. The locations are chosen at random and come in the mission briefing. Since you haven't read the briefing, I'll just disable the alarms."

He placed the tips of his forefinger and index finger on the two upper corners facing us, then on the top of the lip.

Gai grinned and popped the lid. "Now, starting from top to bottom, we're going to take out each individual weapon and determine if it's in good condition. This is why most inspections only happen after the crate in question had been jostled or damaged, but it's a good learning experience, so we're doing it now."

There were groans from the other Genin, which made me annoyed. I hope this didn't turn out to be a waste of time.

"First off, we've got one kunai...tipped...spear," Gai said, grabbing said kunai stabbing straight up and pulling it out. Instead of a single spear, he pulled up the whole collection, as it was a collection of spear tips glued to a black false bottom.

I fist-pumped. "Yes! I knew it!"

Gai blinked, and knocked the crate's wall with a chakra empowered knuckle. The crate's walls fell open, revealing a glass case that fit snugly inside the crate. Inside that transparent case...was a person.

"Byakugan," Neji snapped at the sight. "Gai-sensei...that's Seiji. A Hyuuga branch member."

"You know him?" Gai asked, sounding deadly serious.

"Not personally," Neji replied, his eyes narrowing. "But he vanished on a mission over a week ago. We thought he had died, but apparently not. He's sleeping, and it looks like the case is keeping him alive."

"Think we should wake him up?" I asked, looking at the seals written on the base of the case.

"I don't think we should risk it," Kakashi-sensei replied. "If this case is keeping him alive, it could also kill him if it's opened by unauthorized personnel."

Makes sense to me.

"Is this the drivers fault?" Nichiren asked quietly, referring to the sleeping carriage driver.

Perception Check Failure: 7 / 10.

Seriously, how does a carriage driver warrant a maxed out stat check?

"We've got nothing besides Daisuke's suspicions," Kakashi pointed out, making me frown in annoyance at him. "He's proven accurate so far, so I'm willing to believe him, but we need hard evidence. So, I think our best option is to confiscate the box when we arrive in town this evening and send a messenger bird to the Hokage directly. Then we'll do a sweep of the company offices to see if we can find anything."

I'm just glad I'm being taken seriously.

If this were a fanfic or something, all my teammates would just brush me off as crazy until I was proven right in the end, and then they'd just keep doing it over several more arcs until the lesson stuck.

Quest Updated: The Eyes Have It!


Failed: Escort the Wagon on it's Route to the Border.


Guard the Box until help Arrives.

* * *​

The box containing the unlucky Hyuuga was confiscated and kept within Daisuke's room.

This time, the Genin was left alone, having proven his combat expertise and ability when he had killed not one, but two bandits single handedly. The seven Shinobi ran across rooftops, arriving at the warehouse where everything would be stored. They were silent, they were invisible, they were Ninja.

For the seven of them, getting inside was as effortless as tiptoeing through tulips. There was no night guard, the warehouse was empty.

In the back was their target, the managers office, filled with documentation. A quick pick of the lock, and they were inside. Neji was posted by the door, keeping an eye for someone, anyone who might detect them.

Filing cabinets were discretely picked apart. Nichiren got into the safe. A false bottom was removed to find evidence of corruption of the manager, but nothing tying anyone to the abduction of a Hyuuga clan member."

Eventually, Tenten found it.

"Sensei, everyone, I found something," Tenten said, whipping out the paper for everyone to see. "It's the Carriage Driver! Shimoda-san was right!"

"How do you mean?" Kakashi asked, his eyes narrowing the second he saw the discrepancy.

"Look at the picture," Tenten said, pointing to the paper. "This is his employment record, but that picture doesn't match!"

The picture of Arai was of a skinny, old man. Bald and so skinny that his skin seemed to sag off of his bones. This was a far cry from the heavy set, bearded man who had been driving the carriage of oxen for the past several days.

"How did you not see this before?" Neji asked with a glare.

"Better question," Kakashi growled. "How did none of the coworkers in the first town not see anything?"

"The records we found in the last town didn't even have...a picture," Nichiren's eyes widened. "I think we've got a bigger problem than we thought."

"We need to get back to Daisuke," Hisako snapped, standing, her eyes similarly wide. "Quickly!"

The feeling of urgency was punctuated by the distant sound of an explosion.​

* * *​

Being honest with you, I'm glad I was left alone to fight the boss. As much as I trust my team and as much as I respected team 9's fighting ability, I wanted a one verse one. In the bandit attack, there were seven bandits. Seven! I could be at 3500 EXP right now instead of 1000.

Kind of a petty thing to get mad about, except it really wasn't. I realize there's enough EXP in a living world like mine is to get to max level, but the plot is going to kick into gear next year, and I need to be ready.

Best part of this one verses one? They can't yell at me, because it wasn't my idea. It was Kakashi's, who asked me if I was comfortable standing guard alone.

So here I was, just sitting here on the box, waiting for the boss to show up.

My interest was piqued by the sound of footsteps. Slow, heavy, yet with purpose and in an even rhythm. I grew intrigued when 'a shave and a haircut' was knocked on the door. I got excited when it ended with an explosion that sent the door into splinters on the floor.
Standing in the door frame was Arai, who was looking up at me from beneath his straw hat with a dispassionate expression on his frame.

I smirked. "Got your box."

Happiness, thy name is Daisuke. Because I was right. I knew it. I knew it, I knew it, I knew it. My team will never doubt me again!

...not that they really doubted me in the first place, but it's the principle of the thing!

"So you do," Arai replied with a nod. "Give you one chance to hand it over."

"There's a person in this thing," I replied, pointing to it. "Can't do it."

"Is there?" Arai asked, with a shrug. "Didn't know. Don't ask much questions, don't much care. But one way or the other, I'm walking out of here with that Box. So move it, kid."

I stood up on the box and cracked my knuckled. "I'll give you a chance to apologize for calling me 'kid', and to walk out of here alive."

"Apologize for what?" Arai asked, biting his thumb and smearing blood on his bandages. "It's what you are. Kid. Now hand over the box."

I surged forward with a Body Flicker, aiming a spin-kick to his head. His bandages responded by unwrapping themselves off of his arms and twisting around my leg.

53 / 85 Chakra.

Oh no.

40 / 85 Chakra.

His bandages drain chakra!

Now that's just lame!

Said bandages lifted me up off of the ground and threw me into the opposite wall.

200 / 235 HP.

45 / 85 Chakra.

I collapsed in a heap, then immediately stood, dodging the bandages which had formed themselves into spikes and drove themselves into the wall around me like spikes. I threw my one kunai at his head and it...missed completely, embedding itself in the door frame.

Need a plan.

Sticking to the wall, I kicked my way out the window and used Chakra strings to pull myself back to the wall, running down the windows and breaking into one of the rooms. From there, I jumped and whipped myself back around to the hall, catching sight of my quarry, who hadn't moved.

He turned and caught sight of me right as I Body Flickered to him. Again, his bandages rose to his defense and I used Chakra strings to pull myself to the ceiling to dodge the spikes. With a bounce, I came down with a double haymaker, but he jumped out of the way toward the stairs.

"You're fast, kid," Arai complimented airily.

"Don't call me that," I snarled, sliding forward to strike, then sliding back to dodge the chakra-sapping bandages that made to impale me.

"I'll call you what I want," Arai defied, hands flying through a set of handseals. "Paper Release: Flight of Birds."

Paper Jutsu?

That's a thing? He uses Paper.

I mean, I guess so, since he's manipulating his bandages, but I can't tell if he's laughably weak or insanely cruel.

Out from his loose sleeves, a dozen folded paper planes shot out. Just by seeing them coming, I was able to dodge most of them.

190 / 235 HP.

180 / 235 HP.

170 / 235 HP.

160 / 235 HP.

But we're going to go with unspeakably cruel. The wings of these planes were razor sharp and cut just deep enough to draw blood, but not further. These cuts hurt and to make matters worse, I could see the planes turning around mid-flight to go for another pass.

….crap.

Crap, crap, crap, crap. I need an option. I need a way to kill this guy and kill this guy now, or he's going to murder me by a thousand cuts.

His bandages surged forward.

Lightning Kunai!

Immediately, like snakes on the hunt, they curled up to block the shot without pausing.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 8.

This won't kill me.

But it'll come close.

I used Chakra strings to pull myself to the ceiling, cleanly dodging the bandages, though all the paper planes behind me did is change course.

"Give it up, kid!" Arai said tauntingly. "You don't have to die."

"I am not a child!"

Chakra Control Check Success: 100 / 90.

Ninjutsu Check Failure: 29 / 90.

40 / 235 HP.

0 / 85 Chakra.

All Limbs Crippled!

11,000 / 21,000 EXP to level 9.

All I did was mix the Body Flicker jutsu with Lightning Chakra. I surged forward with such a ridiculous level of speed, I almost missed the punch I aimed at his head. The sparking and chirping of lightning surrounded me, filling my ears with what I felt in my bones was a glorious symphony.

But when my fist collided with his face, it disintegrated.

A wave of thunder ripped out from where I hit him and threw us away from each other, taking the floor out from both of us, and causing me to land on the floor below.

5 / 235 HP.

Fall damage is so annoying. Thankfully, I think the case didn't fall down with us, I didn't hear the sound of glass hitting the floor.

I tried to stand, but my vision blurred and my head...my head may has well have been in pieces. My arms and legs were covered in burns and my chakra bar was locked at 0 for some freaking reason. I was, quite frankly, toast.

Good thing he didn't...he didn't substitute in time. Yeah. I can't fight right now. Guy didn't have a chance! Serves him right.

No one calls me a child.

What's...uh...wait. What's...how many points do I need to get Ninjutsu? I…

Intelligence Check Failed: 7 / 6.

6? That's not right. That's not...right, I'm crippled, thingy. Yeah.

"Daisuke!"

Who was that?

Was that...yeah, that was Hisako.

"Hey...Hisako," Her name came out slithered, but I was doing my best, darnit! "Nice to see you!"

"I'm here, Daisuke." Sounded like she was crying or trying not to. Right? I think she was. I dunno, there was a moisture there in her voice.

"I can kind of see you," I said with a giggle. "Like...I like your jacket."

"Just hold on, Daisuke," Hisako said. "We'll get you to a hospital. Don't worry. Just stay with me. Focus on my voice. Please don't go!"

"Bed!" I snapped. "I need a bed! I really...really need a bed."

"Does anyone have a bedroll?" Kakashi snapped out, almost sounding panicked.

"I have one, Kakashi-sensei!" The...other girl. I know her name! I promise I know her name. "Lay him on this, we can use it to get him to a hospital!"

It's Nine-nine! No...no. Four-four? Eleventy-twelve.

I was picked up by Hisako and laid gently on something really soft. I think...I think...I wanna go to sleep.

Sleep for How Long?

Why does the meter only go to 24 Hours?

I wan...I wanna sleep longer.​

* * *​

Author's Notes: Well, that took longer than expected. Sincerest apologies, everyone, but I am happy with how it turned out.


The point of this chapter, I have discovered, was to highlight Daisuke's berserk button. In the previous draft, this arc was drawn out over more chapters and show Daisuke's inadequacies by having him screw up stealth and lock picking. This time, Daisuke's inadequacy would actually disqualify him from participating in the first place. However, he does excel in combat which I've only shown a few times up until now.


I'm noticing, as I'm going along with the draft, that it's much more compressed. A lot of the fluff that was present in the first time around is absent, simply because I have a better idea of what is actually important. In other words, this arc is shorter than the first time, now I just have the epilogue chapter to do. After that, we'll have that Anko-centered Interlude I planned on.


Hope you all enjoyed it.


Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Chapter 15: The Eyes Have It! - Retrieval
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.


* * *

Okay...my limbs are all attached, I've got full health…and my hospital gown is a mess.

Hate wet dreams. Even before I died, they were the bane of my existence. Worst part is that I'm going to be remembering this one for a while, too.

Started out with Anko and I getting it on. Awesome. Then Hisako joined in. Ayame walked into the scene wearing nothing but that headband of hers and a smile...then Sakura? Shippuden Sakura kicked in the wall like the Kool-Aid Man. Ino and then Hinata. For some reason after that, Tsunade and Shizune walked in. Then an Uchiha lady? I...got nothing. Then this horned woman with ghost-white skin and...it was just a weird orgy that's left me as disturbed as it turned me on.

I wonder if I can recreate it in real life? No, no, Daisuke. Having an idea of what you want isn't bad, but trying to force it never works. Not that you would, but focus on your self improvement and let the relationships happen as they come. Best way to be attractive is to have the worst day with you be better than the best day with anyone else.

Anyway, on to business.

First thing on the list is that I need a ranged option.

Effectively, mid-game is here. If Arai or whatever his name is is a sign of what's to come, I need a ranged option and I don't have the time to get points I need to focus on Ranged Weapons or Ninjutsu before the next fight, even if I abandoned Fuinjutsu and started pumping points into one or the other.

I've got Chakra Control and Taijutsu. This would be so much easier if the Rasengan could be thrown or something.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 9.

Wait, there is absolutely no reason a Rasengan can't be thrown. If you've got the control, chakra can easily persist in a shape even after it's been separated from your body. If it couldn't, Ninjutsu like Lightning Kunai or Sasuke's fireballs wouldn't be possible.

I don't want to use the Rasengan, though. Needs too much chakra. Ideally, this technique would only take as much chakra as the Lightning Kunai and I'd be able to add Lightning Chakra to it without burning my hands.

Then again, a simple, needle-like loop needed a Ninjutsu of 45, so let's not get our hopes up.

I got up out of bed, keenly aware that I was not wearing any of my Charisma enhancing gear. So if nothing else, I was glad that the door to my private room was closed. On a chair in a corner of the room, was all my gear. My jumpsuit, which was perfectly mended, my sandals and most importantly, my storage scrolls.

Among the survival equipment I kept on my person, I kept some office supplies. Multiple large, mural-sized canvas', pens and markers, and most importantly, duct tape. It was a trivial thing to tape them to the wall with Wall Walking. With the marker, I started working on a seal.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 7.

Fuinjutsu Check Success: 69 / 20.

Thankfully, it wasn't a complex seal. All it did was absorb incoming chakra, which I was going to need to avoid damaging the walls.

How to create a cheap, ranged jutsu with just Chakra Shaping that also still did damage? Well, the easiest thing I can think of is a needle.

So I created a needle, it's sapphire glow illuminated my hand.

Chakra 84 / 85.

It was only a third of the size of the loop and it wasn't a loop, it was just a needle, so that it only took a point of chakra was awesome.

I threw the needle...and it hit the very outskirts of the target.

Okay, before I start on the next phase of my problem, I need to understand what this problem is. This is definitely a Ranged Weapon skill deficiency, but Chakra is magic. I should be able to compensate if I understand what the problem is.

Perception Check Failure: 5 / 6.

Intelligence Check Success: 10 / 8.

It's not a hand-eye coordination thing. My senses are fine, even without the goggles +2 Perception buff. So the only thing it could be is my muscle memory is completely warped when it comes to weapons.

If that's the case, then I should be able to compensate for that deficiency with Chakra, right? It shouldn't be anything other than some variation of Body Flicker, since that rigs your body up with Chakra and supercharges it.

So...create another needle…

Chakra 84 / 85.

Then rig up your body with Chakra, but with the aim of correcting poor muscle memory.

Medicine Check Success: 27 / 25.

Taijutsu Check Success: 80 / 50.

Chakra Control Check Success: 100 / 50.

Chakra 64 / 85.

I'm ninety percent sure that the Taijutsu, which is all about understanding body mechanics and how to exploit them for maximum offensive gain, lowered the medicine check. But it works, so I don't care. I threw the needle.

Perk Obtained: C. A. T. S.

Chakra can connect anything, a pair of friends, a person with nature and a kunai with it's target! With the Chakra Assisted Targeting System, you now use your Chakra Control skill in place of your Ranged Weapon skill, if it's higher.

I'm a sucker for creative naming, and as a riff on VATS, I busted up on the spot. That's hilarious! And game-breakingly strong!

And the needle hit a bullseye.

Okay, so I've got my needle, I've got my Ranged Weapon skill deficit figured out, now I just need to figure out the fire-rate problem my needle has, because the way I'm doing it now, I can throw one at a time.

What if I used chakra to create a launching mechanism? Like using a pair of small loops to accelerate the needle to it's target. Let's...see…

Chakra Control Check Success: 100 / 60.

Chakra: 75 / 85.

My hand was coated with chakra. Above the knuckles of my clenched fist was my firing mechanism, a series of rapidly rotating loops that were collectively the size of a US quarter. To test it, I sent a needle. It flew a little bit slower than a kunai, but it flew and it hit the bullseye. Then I sent twenty needles, which only took me two seconds.

That solves the rate of fire issue, at least, but the projectile speed was atrocious.

If I could add Lightning Chakra, that would fix it, but...well, how many points of Ninjutsu do I need for that to not be a problem? Well…hold on, do I even need a needle? Lightning Chakra is the element of piercing, so I might be able to get away with something even smaller than this needle if I add Lightning Chakra.

To test it, I created a bolt, a little nub about a quarter of the size of the needle and not pointy. Ironically, it had better structural integrity than the larger needle, but that's just because it was so small and compact. It flew, but only half as fast as the needle.

Now...to add the lightning chakra.

Ninjutsu Check Success: 29 / 25.

Perception Check Failed: 5 / 7.

The bolt ripped through the air so fast I couldn't even see it, leaving a black and blue scorch mark on my paper. Closer examination revealed that it had actually poked a small hole in my chakra absorbing paper, though thankfully it had not not damaged the wall behind it.

Okay, awesome.

Now that that's taken care of, I'm getting out of here and looking for my team. This isn't Konoha's hospital, I knew that from the skyline, which meant that they were still in town. Thank goodness for Fuinjutsu, otherwise I would've had to wait until we got back to Konoha and I would've been a nervous wreck the whole time.

...hang on.

I just realized.

The Anko's personalized Fuinjutsu manual?

It brought my Fuinjutsu skill to 69.

If that's not a sign from God or something, I don't know what is.​

* * *​

"We're back!" Lee said with a chipper tone in his voice, a hollow sound that belied how he was trying to buoy up the spirits of his fellows. In his hands were three plastic backs, each containing bento boxes and bottles of elixir for everyone to enjoy.

The seven were all crammed together in a single hotel room, moved to the opposite side of the hall. The Hotel Owner was livid about his building being destroyed and demanded financial compensation. Since he was legally in his right, a missive for said compensation had been sent.

They were all crammed around the glass case that their comrade had all but died protecting. They were not going to leave it or anyone alone with it.

Hisako was sitting on the bed, legs dangling over the edge, hands clasped together as she looked at the floor beneath her. Tenten was sitting next to her, rubbing her friend's shoulders in sympathetic solidarity. She didn't move, and didn't look, when Nichiren deposited a box and bottle next to her.

"Hisako, are you going to eat?" Kakashi prodded kindly.

"I'm not hungry," She replied morosely.

"It's unfortunate that fate took a cruel turn," Neji said with a dispassionate look at Hisako. "But there was nothing we could do."

"Nothing we could do," Hisako parroted with hostility, her head snapping up to look at the other Genin. "Really? Nothing we could do. We could've left someone here to stay with him so he wouldn't have fought whoever that was alone."

"But we didn't," Neji replied. "Because he was fated to die."

Hisako immediately leaped to her feet and marched to grab him by his shirt, but was immediately stopped by Gai and Kakashi. She fell back onto the bed, not taking her murderous glare off of the Hyuuga that had earned her ire.

"Come on, now," Gai said with a reassuring smile. "We don't need to start a fight. Daisuke wouldn't be happy to see it."

"And he's going to," Hisako snapped past emergent streams of bitter tears. "He has to."

"Daisuke's snapped back from lethal injury before," Kakashi pointed out kindly, placing his hand on Hisako's shoulder. "He was a little closer before this time, but he'll make it."

"His hands and legs were black, Kakashi-sensei," Hisako protested. "I don't even think he had his feet still!"

"And his rib cage was exposed," Nichiren pointed out, his lips pressed into a flat line.

"Yes, Nichiren!" Hisako screeched, pointing at him. "Thank you! I had completely forgotten! What would I do without you?"

Kakashi gave him the most deadpan of stares, and Nichiren mouthed an apology before turning to his bento box.

"Hey, hey," Tenten said, pulling Hisako closer for a comforting embrace. "It's okay. Let it out."

Hisako started blubbering, first trying to make excuses, then apologies, none of which made it out of her mouth without being interrupted by the heaving sobs that were falling out of her like a dam had broken. She held her face in her hands.

Tenten pulled a piece of tissue paper out from her scrolls and handed it to Hisako, who blew her nose. "I just can't understand. He died because we screwed up. Someone should've stayed behind."

Kakashi held in his sigh. "Hisako?"

"I should've stayed behind."

"Hisako."

"Then he wouldn't have had to fight that guy by himself and at least we'd die toge-"

"Hisako!"

She froze.

Kakashi fell to one knee. "Don't. Don't think that way. Don't go down that road. The only thing there is ruin. If Daisuke lives, you're immolating yourself for nothing. If he does die, you are doing a horrible disservice to his memory. He wouldn't want you to think this way."

"But he shouldn't have died," Hisako whispered. "I mean...not died. He's not dead. Because he can't be. He can't...can't leave me."

"I hope he's not dead," Nichiren started quietly. "He was one of the few people that really believed in me."

"How so?" Lee asked, sounding interested.

"I come from a civilian family," Nichiren explained. "Mom and Dad were, well, nice about it, but they didn't think I'd do well as a Ninja. Didn't take it seriously. So I had a hard time finding time to train or do homework because I'd be spending all my extra time working the store front. When it came time for the exams, I thought my only hope was cheating."

"You cheated on your exams?" Tenten asked incredulously. "How?"

"Snuck a soldier pill inside for the Taijutsu exam and got lucky in the kunai exam," Nichiren explained sheepishly. "I felt so guilty, but then Hisako...and Daisuke. They said I deserved to graduate."

"You did," Hisako sniffed.

"Daisuke's helped me out more than I can think," Nichiren said. "He's helped both of us. So it feels awful to not, you know, have been there for him when he needed us. That's twice we've screwed up."

"Twice?" Neji asked with an arched eyebrow.

"The Monster house," Nichiren pointed out, taking his glasses off and wiping his eyes with his wrists. "Hisako and I hid under a table while that bird-thing tried to murder him. We weren't there for him."

The sound of someone coming up the stairs came to the edge of everyone's hearing.

"If anything, it's my fault," Kakashi admitted. "I'm the one who left Daisuke to guard the box alone."

"And I'm the one who agreed he was probably fine," Gai added, taking further responsibility. "And I thought that the warehouse would be where the trouble would happen. I didn't expect the carriage driver to be our biggest problem on this mission. This was a failure of your leadership, and we apologize."

"Mitarashi's going to kill us," Kakashi said with equal parts humor and dread. "She adored him."

"Well, we'd deserve it," Gai said, matching Kakashi's gallows humor.

There was a knock at the door, and then it opened.

Revealing Daisuke.

"Hey guys!" He was smiling. There wasn't so much as a scratch on him, burns were healed. His jumpsuit and boots were also perfectly mended without a thread out of place. No exposed rib-cage, no stubs for feet or blackened, crippled hands. Just a perfectly healthy twelve-year old boy that could murder a man with his finger. "Hospital discharged me so I came here."

The shinobi teams just sat there in open mouthed shock.

"Sweet, you guys got bento boxes?" He asked, doing a quick count and frowning. "Hey, where's mine?"

Hisako, using the Body Flicker technique for the first time in her life to tackle right into Daisuke, wrapping her arms around him. "You're alive, you're alive, you're alive!"

"Yes! Yes I am," Daisuke said, returning the hug. "Good to see you too, Hisako."

"Daisuke," Kakashi began, unable to contain his surprise. "...how? How are you-?"

"You're not burnt all over anymore," Nichiren said with shock. "You were black and smoking and…"

"Oh!" Daisuke said with a laugh. "I just slept it off. Anyway, don't worry about the bento box, I'm not actually hungry. Just giving you a hard time, no big deal."

"No big deal!" Hisako cried, relaxing but not releasing her hold on Daisuke to stare into his hazel eyes with her onyx colored ones. "No big deal? We thought you were dead!"

Daisuke blinked, telling the perceptive Kakashi and Nichiren that he had just received some kind of premonition. "Oh, right. Well, I almost did die! But my condition can't really degrade once it stabilizes, so all I had to do was get into a bed and sleep it off."

"Your jumpsuit's fixed," Tenten protested. "And it was damaged beyond repair."

"You didn't have feet," Nichiren similarly pointed out.

"And your chakra network was completely fried," Neji explained, his eyes narrowing. "Even if you somehow survived, you shouldn't even be able to breathe right now."

Daisuke blinked multiple times rapidly. "You...guys aren't going to let this go, are you?"

Hisako tightened her hug to press against his chest. "Never again."

Daisuke let out an amused sigh. "Okay, let me explain a bit about...well, my life. If that's okay?"

"I'm most curious, Daisuke," Lee said, quickly nodding.

Daisuke used his foot to kick the door closed and Hisako finally loosened her grip enough to let Daisuke move into the group and sit down, only to interlock her arm and his. He didn't seem to mind that much.

"Where to begin?" Daisuke asked thoughtfully, digging his black book out of his back pocket. "Okay. What I can do is not a bloodline. I called it a bloodline because that's the closest thing we've got to what I've got, but it's not a bloodline."

"So then what is it?" Kakashi asked, folding his arms.

"The way I interact with the world, the laws that govern my existence and dictate how I operate on a fundamental level are completely different from everyone else," Daisuke said, taking a deep breath to steady himself. He opened his black book. "When I was five or six, I don't remember which, I was given this book by a man in green robes. So was my best friend. His book was empty, mine, however, was not."

Inside was the drawing of a man in a similar jumpsuit to Daisuke, wearing a hitai-ate with a village marker that none of them recognized.

"Don't ask about the forehead protector," Daisuke urged quickly. "I didn't create this book, I don't know why that symbol is on there."

"But you know what it means," Nichiren pointed out.

"It's technically the symbol for a corporation," Daisuke explained. "But the corporation doesn't exist anymore, if it ever did."

"Why is there a symbol for a corporation on a hitai-ate?" Tenten asked, scratching her head in confusion.

"I don't know," Daisuke replied. "Which is why I didn't want you to ask about it."

"We're getting off focus," Gai pointed out. "Daisuke, if you'd get back on track."

"Right. So, see these numbers?" Daisuke asked, pointing to number aside words they had honestly never seen before. They recognized the S in the top one, the A in the second from the bottom, but the rest were a mystery. "These are my stats. Strength, Perception, Endurance, Charisma, Intelligence, Agility and Luck. From those stats, specifically Endurance, my Hitpoints are derived."

Daisuke moved his finger from the stats to the bar with a number inside. "I have 235 Hitpoints right now. As I increase in power, I get more. When I take a hit, or sustain in injury, the bar depletes. I lose hitpoints. But no matter how much punishment I take, how severe the injury, I can't die so long as I've got a Hitpoint left."

He looked across the room. "Are you all following me so far?"

"Let's pretend we do," Nichiren said, gesturing for him to continue.

"The fight last night reduced me to 5 hitpoints," Daisuke replied. "But because my condition remains stable after I take an injury, I was fine. Like Neji said, my chakra network was fried, you all saw how crippled I was, but I was fine."
Daisuke took in a breath. "When I sleep for at least an hour, my heath bar refills. All my limbs are restored and my gear, apparently, gets repaired. I don't know why my body acts this way. I don't know how it's possible, but that's how it works and I'm abusing the system for all it's worth."

"Huh," Hisako said, looking at the book. She placed a hand on the corner of a page and looked at Daisuke. "May I?"

Daisuke sighed. "Oh, sure. Might as well."

She turned the page. "What are these?"

"These are why training doesn't work to make me stronger," Daisuke replied. "These are my skills. I've got thirteen. Periodically, I get points to increase them. Bare minimum of any skill is five, which is so low the Academy would fail it. But the maximum, a hundred, is perfection."

Hisako blinked. "You're kidding."

"Not kidding," Daisuke rebutted, shaking his head.

"So what's the skill you have here that's maxed out?" Hisako asked.

"My Chakra Control," Daisuke sighed.

The room was silent as they processed this new information.

"I'm not asking for you guys to understand, because I don't get it either," Daisuke hurriedly said. "I'm just asking for your acceptance."

"Daisuke, this is…" Lee began. "Very unusual. Training doesn't work on you?"

"It does not," Daisuke replied with a nod. "It absolutely does not. The only way I can increase my skills is through the ones I get periodically, and reading manuals."

Hisako gasped. "That's why you spent so much time in the library?"

"When you say you get these skill points periodically," Gai began slowly. "What causes you to get the points? Is it a timer, or…"

"It's dependent on a mix of killing enough people and completing enough missions," Daisuke answered. "I get something called experience points which fill and experience bar and when it fills, I gain a level. When I get a level, I get more hit points and...more skill points."

Nichiren immediately knew he was holding something back, but his head was spinning, so he didn't care that much.

The room was quiet, only the sound of Daisuke nervously drumming his fingers against his leg. He was trying to remain chipper, but they could feel his nervousness.

"I think I get why you're so twitchy about your bloodline," Hisako said quietly. "It's weird."

"Don't I know it," Daisuke replied with a nervous smile.

"Wait," Nichiren said. "This is kind of like Shinobi and Shuriken. You...you're...Daisuke, are you an RPG character?"

"That's about the size of it," Daisuke said, relief flooding his voice. "Yes, that's exactly it. I'm like an RPG character."

"Oh, that nerd game," Tenten said, face scrunching up in confusion. "...your bloodline is the weirdest thing I've ever heard of, Shimoda-kun."

"I'm with you there," Daisuke replied, nodding authoritatively. "It is bizarre."

"If training doesn't help you," Lee said. "Then I must help you get better in the only way that you can! I'm going to scour the elemental nations for books that you can read to get better!"

"Thanks," Daisuke sounded like he was going to laugh. "You know what would help me the most? Medical Manuals. Need to up my medicine skill for...plans of mine."

"Yosh!" Lee said giving him a thumbs up. "Becoming a doctor is a most youthful goal!"

"So...any questions, accusations of being an eldritch abomination...anything?" Daisuke asked.

They had no idea what 'eldritch' meant, but since it was used in conjunction with Abomination, it couldn't be good.

"No," Hisako shook her head quickly, looking like she was going to cry again. "No, no, no. You're not an er...erd...you're not an abomination. Never think that."

"It's an odd bloodline," Kakashi confirmed. "But one with a lot of potential."

"Yosh!" Gai beamed. "I expect the Hokage is going to approach you about a harem any day now!"

Hisako blinked. "Harem?"

"Gai, really?" Kakashi asked, his voice thoroughly tired.

"Harem?"

"I...think I may have got a bit too far there," Gai said, sheepishly rubbing the back of his head in embarrassment. "Sorry."

"What do you mean by harem?"

"Don't...mention it to the Hokage, please," Daisuke said, pleadingly. "I mean, I think you're right, but I want a chance to go over the law first to make sure I agree with it ethically."

"Daisuke, is he being serious about a Harem?" Hisako asked, eyes wide in alarm.

"Probably, yeah," Daisuke nodded. "Doesn't sound like something you wanted to hear."

Her head twisted on her neck and she got this painful grimace on her face. "No."

"I'm kind of ambivalent about it myself," Daisuke agreed.

"It just doesn't seem…" Hisako paused to gather her thoughts. "I don't know. I'd have to think about it."

"Who knows, maybe he won't say anything about it at all," Daisuke said with a grin. "Anyway, you all look beat and I, well, I don't need to sleep. So, I'll take first watch."

"I'm not leaving you alone again," Hisako grumbled, tightening her hold on Daisuke's arm.

"Kakashi-sensei, do you mind if she stays up with me?" Daisuke asked.

"I don't think I can convince her otherwise," Kakashi said with an eye-smile.​

* * *​

Quest Updated: The Eyes Have It!

Completed: Guard the Box Until Help Arrives.

Talk with the Hokage and Hyuuga Hiashi.

Oh, boy. They brought in the big guns.

...I wasn't able to sleep. Not after last night. Coming clean, explaining hitpoints to them was the most terrifying thing of my life, if only because I wasn't sure they'd believe me or if they did, they'd believe me a portent of the end times.

Given Nichiren's weird visitor after the armed insurrection, perhaps they should.

Hisako didn't last long, falling asleep on my arm and finding her head resting in my lap. I had distracted myself by stroking one of the strands of hair she let fall around her face to frame her jaw. Wound up thinking about us.

...she was shocked by the idea of a harem. Hadn't even crossed her mind. She needed time to process it, couldn't decide if she was fascinated or repulsed by the idea, oddly enough. At least, that's why my Charisma check said.

Once first watch was over, I tucked Hisako into bed as Kakashi and Gai took over second watch and I went to bed and laid there, thinking.

Just goes to show that if it does happen, I need to do my absolute best to be-

There was a knock at the door.

-worth sharing.

I got up and opened the door. Standing there in his robes was the Hokage. "Shimoda-san. I can't tell you how pleased I am to see you alive."

"Thank you, Hokage-sama," I said with a bow. "It's pretty good to be alive, if I do say so myself."

He chuckled lightly. "Shimoda, I received a report about what you told your team following your remarkable recovery."

I stiffened. "Yes, Hokage-sama?"

"Though it's likely your bloodline is un-inheritable," The Hokage began. "Just from what you told them, I am still authorizing you for a harem."

Gai was right. "Uh...does the fact that I'm not even married factor into this?"

"It does," The Hokage replied. "It is not an order to take a dozen women right now, but rather I opened the door for you if you wished a large sampling of the fine women Konoha has to offer. It is still customary to marry a woman to be your main wife before you take sub-wives."

Sub-wives? That's interesting, I've been calling them concubines. I definitely prefer this new term, though. "So...why hasn't it been authorized for, say, Uchiha Sasuke?"

"What makes you think it hasn't?" The Hokage asked with a smirk.

Perception Check Success: 7 / 4.

"The tooth and nail fighting I've seen his fan-girls get into," I said, remembering a particularly memorable scuffle I watched from the academy library window. "Saying that they're the only ones that can have him."

"Young man, they'd say that especially if he could have more than one," Hiruzen replied like he was talking to a naive school-boy. To be fair, I kind of was in this subject. "But to tell the truth, I haven't done it yet as a means to protect the boy; he's too focused on revenge and too many would take advantage of it to get a Sharingan-bearing heir in their clan."

Wait, that makes it sound like the uninheritable nature of my bloodline enabled the harem instead of stopping it. "What about me?"

"You?" Hiruzen laughed. "I've half a mind to field promote you to Jounin after what you pulled. But I don't want to so you'll have a great performance in the Chunin exams!"

"Oh," I blinked in surprise. I'm only level 8, so I won't push the issue. "Thank you, Hokage-sama, but I'd rather stay with my team right now."

"And that resolves that little dilemma," Hiruzen remarked, taking a happy puff from his pipe.

"Hokage-sama, we are ready to leave," Hyuuga Hiashi walked up, flanked by ANBU. "And Shimoda-kun, out of the deepest gratitude from the Hyuuga, should you decide to take sub-wives, I have a daughter who is coming of age in the winter. You have my full permission to court her and, if it so pleases you, to marry her."

Charisma Check Success: 7 / 6.

Well...he said court, but I think that's mostly because he doesn't want me insulting the Hyuuga by just taking Hinata to my bedchambers like a common prostitute. He'd prefer a modicum of decorum before a marriage was arranged. Personally, I'd prefer a lot of decorum and a ceremony sealing the deal before we went any further than first base, but that's just me. Call me weird.

Besides, she's got a massive crush on Naruto. Can't just forcibly install myself in her life and stomp all over that.

"I'm surprised you aren't pushing for her to be my main wife," I said with an arched eyebrow.

"Forgive me, Shimoda, but I'm being realistic," Hyuuga Hiashi replied. "I have it on good authority that you and Mitarashi are very close."

"Spying on me?" I asked, a little startled and irritated with myself for not taking the Hyuuga's eyes into consideration.

"No, she's been talking about you since you left," Hyuuga Hiashi replied, leaning down slightly to get closer. "And according to some of the Kunoichi in the Branch Families, she's positively enthralled."

That's...that makes me feel good. "Uh...thanks for telling me. I guess we need to be more discreet in the future, huh?"

"Oh, a wedding removes that need," Hiruzen chortled. "But, Shimoda, I have to ask...and please don't take this the wrong way, but has she been forward with you? Extraordinarily so?"

Really? "She gave me a goodbye kiss when I left. We haven't done anything else."

"Then she has grown," Hiruzen stated with a nod and satisfied smile. "I'm quite glad. It's rare to see a happy ending like this in real life."

What has she done to earn a reaction like that? Obviously it's in the past, but what?

"Are we done talking about my dating life now, or…?" I started, eager to get a move on.

"Right," Hiruzen said. "Now, this mission was ranked up to S rank, and the eight of you will be paid accordingly. Also, don't talk about it, we have an investigation underway."

"Who was that Ninja I killed?" I asked with a frown.

"Comparisons from the photo showed he was likely a man named Mori Kazu," Hiruzen explained. "A-rank homeless-nin. apparently working smuggling for time now. We don't know who for yet, but when we find out, it'll be a weight off of everyone's shoulders."

"Great," I said with a grin.

"Now, all teams are heading back to the village now," Hiruzen ordered. "We need to be gone when the insurance agents come to examine the damage."

Quest Complete: The Eyes Have It!

20,000 / 21,000 EXP to level 9.

So close!

Turns out, I wasn't the only one out. Hisako's room was right next to mine and she was looking at me with wide, disappointed and almost fearful eyes.

I looked at her. "We'll talk when we get home, alright?"

"Okay," Hisako nodded, desperately pretending like everything was alright in her head. "Okay, I'd like that."

I hope she hasn't just had her heart broken into a thousand pieces. Or if it has, that I can put it back together.​

* * *​

Author's Note: That was a quick turnaround. I confess the reason for not leveling Daisuke up immediately was because I didn't want to do that level up calculations this evening since it's late and I'm tired.

I hope no one's disappointed that Daisuke's reveal scene was done in the third person. I confess that I had wanted to do something different and I felt like highlighting their confusion and emotional whiplash was more important than showing Daisuke's reticence. We all know Daisuke didn't want to share but he's already shared more, so it doesn't make for the best drama to highlight his reluctance when the most likely reaction to that is 'get on with it'.

As for the harem, I can't imagine being told by the village's supreme leader that you're probably going to have to share your crush because he's serious about someone else and he can have more than one is particularly easy. In her position, I'd be cursing up a storm and have to fight the conflicting urges to murder the Hokage and murder the Hypotenuse in her situation.

Anyway, let me know what you thought!

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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Chapter 16: Interlude - To Love is Good
The Following is a fan based work of fiction: Naruto and Naruto: Shippuden are owned by Shueisha, Viz Entertainment and Masashi Kishimoto. Please support the official release.

Author's Note: For those that haven't, please reread the previous chapter. I replaced the first section to hopefully be less contentious and remove the unfortunate implications. Thank you for your patience and feedback!

* * *
The moment Anko saw Shimoda Daisuke, she wanted him inside her.

That urge alone rang dozens of alarm bells and raised every single emotional defense she had. The only thing that followed feelings like that were of being used, heartache and a black hole of sorrow. He was her client, of course, so she had to be polite, but that didn't mean he wasn't getting anything out of her. No sir. She was done with that.

She was remembering this as she was examining a tea set in an old antique store. The cups were made of wood, the cloth a fine silk. An ancient but well cared for from what she could tell, reluctantly parted with.

But then Daisuke respected her space, which was decent of him. Kept things civil, beyond the request to walk beside him instead of behind him so he could catch a glimpse every once in a while. The thought was appealing in it's own way, but no. Mitarashi Anko had a job to do.

She set the set down, carefully putting it back in it's bamboo-weave basket with the reverence such a set was due, then placed it in the shopping basket slung over her arm. Then she went to the next one. This one was relatively new. Made of white porcelain, painted with flowers.

This, she put away immediately. Tea sets were meant to be simple, and she was a snob about her tea sets. It was meant to be simple, meditative. The ceremony, a spiritual experience. Hospitality, respect, all things she wanted to share with her new boyfriend.

Anko sighed contentedly.

The first hint that Daisuke, perhaps, might be different than her...other boyfriends, was when he had stuck up for her after she had foolishly left an opening for ROOT to kidnap him. She saw what she had done, then so did the Hokage. A normal genin would've taken credit for killing two highly trained ANBU division Shinobi, then she would've been taken off the mission, and likely Court Martialed.

Not her boyfriend.

He gave all the credit to her, acting like an excited twelve year old he supposedly was, saving her mission and her career.

Daisuke, if nothing else, was thoughtful. Something he demonstrated repeatedly by doing small, sweet kindnesses. Doing the dishes without being asked, sharing the fruits of his Fuinjutsu Experimentation by making her a glass of chocolate milk...the little things.

Of course, she was soon sharply reminded that she wanted to jump his bones, in spite of him being a little young, was when he sparred with a prodigy Hyuuga and blocked his tenketsu.

Anko still couldn't believe Daisuke did that. Then his brutally efficient take down once his challenge was completed...oh, that sent lightning bolts through her body in the best way possible. But, she had to make sure. No one was completely unflappable. Not really.

...so Anko did the stupidest thing she had ever done in her life and threw a kunai at her client.

He didn't even flinch.

He complimented her aim.

He stole her heart.

Anko smiled at the memory, the feeling of certainty that he was the one to make her happy, to complete her. Of their goodbye, feeling his lips against hers, his chakra strings pulling her in, demanding her touch, her snakes similarly encircling him, pressing them against each other. She remembered wanting to go further, but her oath of so long ago came to her mind and she...had to break it off.

Daisuke was nothing but supportive, which she appreciated. Anko was pretty sure her barriers to his touch were made of wet paper at this point, so his respecting of her wishes was beautiful... even though part of her wished he'd just grab her throat, force her to the ground and finally take what was his.

She was a bottom, and certainly not dead.

Anko shook her head. Time for that later. Maybe.

But it was this care in mind that she was looking for a tea set. Something that embodied the careful virtue they were cultivating together that could easily be destroyed the second he lost control, because she would not resist.

A set of wood. Daisuke was not wood. He was stone, and steel. Blue like lightning, relentless like thunder, unyielding like a mountain. Another set of porcelain, this one white and otherwise unpainted. Good, but not quite what she was looking for.

This one was a steel set. Automatically, she didn't like this one. Daisuke was steel, she was not. She was a snake. A pretty snake, as Daisuke put it, a temptress, a dealer of death by instant strikes and venom.

...Daisuke told her she'd make a 'heck of a Mom'. Children were something that she had always wanted. The title of Mother had an almost mythical allure to her that maybe was starting to get closer and closer to reality. In her mind, she used to figure that any child would be fine. Maybe. Someone to cuddle, love, dote on, mother. Now...she wanted Daisuke's children.

Physically, he was a little young. Sure. She admitted it made her feel a little awkward. Just a little. But he didn't act young. Whether it was that he was just an old soul, made more mature by his bloodline or what but with how he acted, it was almost easy to forget that he was fresh out of the academy.

Two cups, ladles, cloths to ceremonially clean the implements. Artfully placed in the box of bamboo.

On a practical level, she knew Daisuke was still human. He didn't seem like it most days, but she knew he had limits, personal weaknesses, just like she did. In particular his resistance to being called a child or a kid struck her as being of note. On the surface, it was a Genin being insistent that because he was technically an adult now meant he should be treated like one but it seemed deeper than that.

Like it was an open wound that got poked whenever he was called a child.

As much as Anko believed it would be helpful for him to come out and talk about it, trying to force the issue would only make him more upset, this she learned by hard experience. She had to use both hands to count the relationships she ruined by being emotionally pushy.

And she did ruin them. She was the one who created problems or contributed to existing ones because of her pride and unwillingness to accept his limitations.

It was a long night at the end of a bottle when she figured that out.

...why couldn't they change?

Well, why couldn't she change?

Anko took a deep breath and let it go.

It was a bad idea to get into that downward spiral of questions. No. She was here to get a new tea-set to host a ceremony for her boyfriend with. It was a new beginning, hopefully one with a happy ending.

The next tea set...was white, of course. But it had a single sakura blossom painted on both cups. A symbol of renewal, painted tastefully in a way that few of other other mass produced sets could match. A new beginning for her and, if Daisuke and her wound up marrying...for both of them.
Anko put this set away, and placed it in her shopping basket.

She had found what she was looking for.
* * *
"I told you to get lost, Naruto!"

Naruto rubbed his jaw in annoyance as he walked away from the academy. He felt depressed and down trodden as his crush, the prettiest girl in Konoha had turned him down. Again. With that impressive right hook of hers.

"Naruto!"

The boy looked and saw Satoshi, waving with a genial smile on his face as he caught up. "I'm glad to see you! How have you been?"

"I'm fine!" Naruto said with a smile, only to wince in pain as his jaw acted up. "Ow."

"Oh, did that girl hurt you?" Satoshi asked, frowning in sympathy. "The one with the pink hair?"

Naruto winced. "You saw that?"

"I'm afraid I did," Satoshi said with a nod. "So, how's the quest for that scroll I told you about?"

"It's...it's going okay," Naruto said with narrowed eyes. "You know, the Hokage asked me about you. Said you've been talking with enemies of the village!"

"Is that so?" Satoshi asked with alarm. "Who on earth would...oh, right. The bird creature. I remember it. I'm afraid I was only trying to save my own life."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Naruto asked with a glare.

"Well, I was walking down a dark alleyway here in the village one night," Satoshi began to explain. "When I was jumped by a large...bird-man. Truly massive, with it's beak shining in the moonlight. I can only assume it was some form of advanced Henge. I disarmed it and we talked."

"How did you disarm it?" Naruto asked, looking downright amazed.

"Why, with a compliment, of course!" Satoshi said with a smile. "I told it that I was impressed with it's ability to jump from the shadows with such stealth and finesse. It even thanked me!"

"It thanked you?" Naruto asked, flabbergasted. "It nearly killed Daisuke!"

"Did it?" Satoshi asked, looking aghast. "I am so sorry, I didn't know. The creature kept talking about a boy in blue. Is that-?"

"Daisuke? Yeah." Naruto glared, folding his arms. "He started wearing a blue jumpsuit a while ago. And the Hokage said that you had something to do about it."

"Well, I gave him some encouragement and that made him feel good enough to leave me alone," Satoshi replied, bringing his hands up like he was making a plea. "I truly didn't know who he was talking about."

"Okay, well," Naruto started. "You should go talk to the Hokage, get it straightened out. I can bring you too him."

"No, no," Satoshi shook his head. "That's quite alright, but thank you for the offer. I can make it there on my own. Perhaps I'll run into Shimoda-kun as well, and we can clear this misunderstanding right up."

"Yeah, you should do that," Naruto replied, nodding.

"So, about the scroll," Satoshi began.

"What about it?" Naruto asked.

"Well, if you haven't gotten it yet, clearly you have a good reason," Satoshi replied, his head tilting while a curious expression painting itself across his face. "I was wondering what your plans were to take it?"

"I don't know," Naruto shrugged. "The top three levels of the library don't have windows and they're locked by some kind of reinforced gate that the librarian closes when it's time to shut down for the night."

Satoshi hummed. "Quite a conundrum! Walk with me."

The two started walking side-by-side.

"So if one path is closed to you, that just means you need to find the key," Satoshi began. "What do you think that means, Naruto?"

"I need a jutsu to get past the door?" Naruto asked.

"Bright boy!" Satoshi beamed down at the blonde, making him feel really, really good. "Bright boy. Yes, that is the correct answer. You need another jutsu. Did you have a specific jutsu in mind?"

"No," Naruto said, kicking the dirt beneath his shoe. "I don't know of any other jutsu. Do you know? Can you teach me a cool jutsu?"

"Can I teach you?" Satoshi asked airily. "Of course I could. Easily. But this is about taking power for yourself. Without help, remember?"

"I just don't want to ask Daisuke," Naruto remarked with a surly glare. "He's always been better than me at everything, I don't need him rubbing my nose in it."

"Is that so?" Satoshi said. "Well, then. I have another test for you."

"Another test?" Naruto whined. "Come on! Really? Can't you just teach me right now?"

"Oh, don't be so dramatic," Satoshi gently admonished. "It's a very simple thing. Satoshi, you see, is not my only name."

"It's not?" Naruto frowned. "Are you like a spy or something?"

"Hardly," Satoshi answered with a grin. "Different people know me by different names. But, see, I am known throughout the Elemental Nations by one specific name. So the test is simple! Tell me who I am."

"You're famous," Naruto stated, blinking owlishly at the older man.

"Oh, quite famous," Satoshi replied. "Still, if you can't get it, then I can point you in the direction of a technique which will let you get to the Summoning Scroll."

"Really?" Naruto asked, his confusion forgotten. "Where is it?"

"Do you know what a Kinjutsu is?" Satoshi asked.

Naruto started to talk, but then lost track of what he was saying. Then he tried again, only to realize that this was the wrong answer. Satoshi, if he was annoyed at the blonde's slowness, didn't show it.

"It's a forbidden jutsu?" Naruto asked.

"Very good," Satoshi replied, giving a nod of approval. "Now, I believe you've got a glimpse of the scroll of Kinjutsu on the top floor of the academy? In the Hokage's suite?"

"I...yeah!" Naruto nodded. "Is that what the big black scroll is?"

"That's right," Satoshi answered with a happy nod. "Now I'm afraid the sheer amount of trouble you'd be in for stealing the scroll would be significant, I'm afraid. But in that scroll are several techniques that can get you to the scroll with the summoning Jutsu."

"But I can get it," Naruto said, adopting a meditative expression, cupping his chin and looking to the clouds. "Ah, I'd have to put the a fake in it's place while I'm learning it. But what kind of trouble would I be in?"

"Life imprisonment," Satoshi replied, to Naruto's shock. "But is it worth it to get to a place where people like you...for you?"

Naruto folded his arms and looked down and to the side, away from Satoshi's head. "I don't know."

"Assessing the risk is an important part of every venture," Satoshi nodded approvingly. "Caution is a virtue. Of course, if you figure out who I am, I can just teach you the jutsu on those scrolls, no need to take the risk, am I right?"

Naruto grunted. "Can I have a hint, Satoshi? Please?"

Satoshi hummed. "I'll give you two as a gesture of good faith."

"Really?" Naruto beamed. "Thanks!"

Satoshi snapped his fingers. In a plume of smoke, there emerged a scythe in his hand. The handle perfectly straight and so black that it made Naruto's eyes hurt just to look at it. The blade was of crimson steel, curving slightly and gleaming wickedly in the sunlight. "My favored weapon is a scythe."

"Okay," Naruto looked at it, feeling perhaps for the first time in his life an eerie chill rush down his spine like a spider made of ice. What's worse, there was a sick feeling in the pit of his gullet, like something was telling him to run and never stop.

"And I am very, very, very old," Satoshi said, snapping his fingers and making the scythe disappear, leaving only the memory of his feelings. "That, combined with everything else you know about me, should be enough to piece together my identity."

"So your name really isn't Satoshi," Naruto stated carefully.

"It is, actually, Satoshi," he replied. "But that is not the name the Elemental Nations know me by. Find that, and I will teach you anything you wish to know."

"Okay," Naruto said, looking from side to side, noting that the street was empty for some reason in the middle of the day. "Are you sure you can't teach me something now?"

"Oh, I'll give you one lesson," Satoshi replied. "A life lesson, not a jutsu."

"Yeah? What is it?" Naruto asked with a frown.

"The girl who nearly cost you a tooth," Satoshi began with an impassive expression. "You must never trouble her again."

"But she's the prettiest girl in the village!" Naruto debated hotly. "If I can get her to treat me like I'm somebody, I can get anyone in this village to respect me!"

"You obtain respect by treating yourself like you're somebody and training yourself to realize your potential," Satoshi corrected. "Earning respect is like punching a mountain, if you do not have the strength, you only break your hands trying to force it."

"Yeah, well," Naruto folded his arms and frowned deeply, like a child being scolded by a parent. "What does that have to do with Sakura?"

"She has repeatedly told you that she is not interested in you," Satoshi plainly stated. "You cannot force her to change her mind and every attempt to fight it will only fuel her resistance and add to her resentment."

"But Sasuke would be terrible for her," Naruto whined, trying to get him to understand his position. "She thinks she can change him but he's just going to treat her like trash because he's an arrogant jerk!"

"Then let her find that out for herself and find someone that truly wants you," Satoshi insisted. "You cannot teach someone a lesson they do not wish to accept and if you continue along this road, you will bring yourself nothing but pain."

Naruto harrumphed and walked ahead.

Satoshi simply shrugged, turned on his heels and walked in the opposite direction.

Naruto found himself startled when he nearly ran into someone standing on front of a merchant stall. Suddenly, the street was filled with people once again.

Where did all these people come from? Naruto asked in bewilderment. The street was empty!
* * *
Author's Note: Speaking of the mini-rewrite I did last chapter, I actually like it a lot better. I wrote the first iteration while I was really tired and after I vetoed another scene idea in its entirety – I actually initially planned on having Daisuke go see the town for a bit before heading back to the hotel and meet Tsunade and Shizune. Unfortunately, while this would be 100% in character for a PC to do in an RPG, in a real life scenario made him a giant douche, so I was trying to write stream of conciousness, drawing on the same, insane thought processes that I go through early in the morning in a haze before I get up. Sadly, this made him look like a giant douche.

Sadly, the scene didn't really accomplish much for the story and you guys all took issue with it, so I rewrote it into what it is now. I like it, it actually shows Daisuke making progress in response to a near death experience in a concrete way, as opposed to the abstract way of the previous draft.

Now, for this chapter.

I recognize that it's a bit short, but I really ran out of ideas. I had an idea for a segment involving a character that hadn't been properly introduced, but one of the rules of the fic is that a character cannot have an interlude until they've been introduced in the main story and I've already broke that rule once.

Hopefully, you guys consider this as having a fuller picture of Anko. Shopping for a tea set was an idea I got from one of you, though I don't remember who. Which is a tragedy, because they deserve all the credit for such a brilliant idea. The Japanese Tea Ceremony is something of fascination of mine since it's more than just a get-together; it's almost like a sacred ordinance in Japanese culture. The fact that it's listed as a hobby of Anko's makes her a fairly spiritual person, in my opinion.

As for Naruto, there was a time when I considered Sakura a terrible, terrible person for the physical abuse she heaps on Naruto. While some of the time, it may be undeserved, but I understand the habit developed because Naruto, strong personality that he is, would not take no for an answer and she's starting to run out of options for dealing with a boy that has limitless stamina and is otherwise insanely tough and will not take no for an answer.

Let me know what you think.

Until the next time!

~Fulcon
 
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