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Commercial Break (Worm / Slut Life) (Borderline SFW)

Should I post 2.9 a week early or keep to the normal schedule? 2.10 will be on 11/13 regardless.

  • Yes, post 2.9 on 10/23

    Votes: 13 48.1%
  • No, wait until 10/30

    Votes: 14 51.9%

  • Total voters
    27
  • Poll closed .
...I have qualms about how you wrote Hackerman, but if (as I somewhat suspect) he is only going to be in this one scene, they aren't really worth bringing up. Especially not with "I've already written a ways past this" in effect.
Most of Hackerman's dialogue was either only slightly adapted or directly lifted from his spin-off short, so I don't think there's room for his characterization to have gone too far wrong. (turns to face other camera) Ladies.
 
Apparently, Hackerman is just that good at hacking.
If he was that good at hacking he would have installed some better drivers and a shell so that he AI could be uploaded to the shard.Or at least installed a better method of communication that could be used without literally spiking her brain.
 
I have to admit I'm curious what your qualms are, considering I did my best to copy his speech style and mannerisms from the hacking tutorial. Also, while I've written further out, it's fairly unlikely that anything Hackerman does differently would affect more than a chapter or two... unless you think he should have failed, leaving Taylor stranded on Earth. Trying to make that change would be quite a lot of work.

Most of Hackerman's dialogue was either only slightly adapted or directly lifted from his spin-off short, so I don't think there's room for his characterization to have gone too far wrong. (turns to face other camera) Ladies.
Basically, what Czly says is exactly my "complaint". I've only seen one video with Hackerman, but over half his part in the chapter feels like it was lifted directly from that video -- not "adapted from", copied outright. That feels fake. Other reference characters (at least, who I recognize) have had different actions from their source material, but in a way that feels natural, that feels like something they might actually do.

Like I said, it's not worth worrying about (...in this particular case, I'm realizing; this might be good feedback as "thing to watch out for in future") unless he's going to show up again.
 
Basically, what Czly says is exactly my "complaint". I've only seen one video with Hackerman, but over half his part in the chapter feels like it was lifted directly from that video -- not "adapted from", copied outright. That feels fake. Other reference characters (at least, who I recognize) have had different actions from their source material, but in a way that feels natural, that feels like something they might actually do.

Like I said, it's not worth worrying about (...in this particular case, I'm realizing; this might be good feedback as "thing to watch out for in future") unless he's going to show up again.

Ah, I can see how that'd be an issue. In this case, which I may not have made clear enough, most of his actions and dialog is at least partially scripted for his 'Hacking Tutorial.' If he shows up again, he'll act at least a little more normal, since he won't be playing up his television persona.

Or, to put it another way, the reason it sounded fake was because it should, since I figure Hackerman repeats most of his lines on all of his tutorials.
 

Babnockorty? Babnockorty. Wow. You really went there.

...It took me far longer to notice than I wish to admit.


That aside, fun little story so far. Very interested to see how it's going to go from here on out. Based on what has happened so far, it may or may not fall within my interests long-term, but just the fact that it's an SFW Slut Life tale was enough to make me substantially curious. I'm kind of wondering whether Taylor is going to be avoiding sex whenever possible, or if it's just going to be alluded to in a fade-to-black, pick-up-after-it's-over sort of way. Or some mix of the two, I suppose? Hmm.

With that said, I am at least curious to see Magical Girl Miss Militia Dakka Taylor, or whatever she ends up being, among other things. Definitely following this for now.

Unrelated, but random question for everyone: What is Hackerman from? Sounds familiar, but I can't place it.
 
Babnockorty? Babnockorty. Wow. You really went there.
I assumed it was an original random collection of syllables. Searching for it only brings up this thread and the FFn mirror, at any rate.

Hackerman is from Kung Fury and (very directly) a spinoff short called something like "Hackerman's hacking lesson." It's (legitimately uploaded) on YouTube.
 
Babnockorty? Babnockorty. Wow. You really went there.

...It took me far longer to notice than I wish to admit.

You're the first person to mention noticing that in the thread, unless I missed something.

Unrelated, but random question for everyone: What is Hackerman from? Sounds familiar, but I can't place it.

As Czlyydwr mentioned, Hackerman is from Kung Fury, which is free to watch on Steam. It is basically all of the stereotypical 80's movie cheese consolidated into a single, intentionally bad movie. It's definitely hit or miss as to if you'll enjoy it. If you do watch it, I recommend keeping subtitles on for certain gems.

[Synth-Pop Intensifies]
 
Calling Kung Fury a movie is a misnomer, given it's only like 1/2 an hour long.



 
Babnockorty? Babnockorty. Wow. You really went there.

...It took me far longer to notice than I wish to admit.

I assumed it was an original random collection of syllables. Searching for it only brings up this thread and the FFn mirror, at any rate.

You're the first person to mention noticing that in the thread, unless I missed something.

I guess I shouldn't have assumed. I didn't read anything in the thread except for story posts, up until the most recent one, but I had kind of figured someone must have noticed it before me.

For anyone who is wondering wtf I was referring to, "Babnockorty" can be unscrambled and split to spell "Brockton Bay."

Which makes me wonder if there is anything similar going on with the other two planets that were mentioned around the same time, "Yiobos" and "Jeyter." Nothing is immediately obvious to me, but maybe one of you can spot something?

Also, thanks for the explanations on Hackerman.

EDIT:
Well yes, that's obvious. I thought you noted some actual reference or a pun or something.

I mean, I didn't think it was some revolutionary insight. The whole reason I didn't explain when I first mentioned it was because it seemed obvious in retrospect as soon as I noticed it.

Nope, those two were taken from a random planet name generator, so any references are coincidental.

Ahh, okay. Thanks for clarifying. At least now I'm not wondering whether I was missing something.
 
Last edited:
Which makes me wonder if there is anything similar going on with the other two planets that were mentioned around the same time, "Yiobos" and "Jeyter." Nothing is immediately obvious to me, but maybe one of you can spot something?

Nope, those two were taken from a random planet name generator, so any references are coincidental.
 
Preparation 2.b
Preparation 2.b




Zion would be humming to himself as he worked, if he were the type to do so. Unfortunately, he hadn't bothered to figure out how humans made that particular sound, and wasn't going to take the time to figure it out, so he continued his work silently. There was a brush fire that needed to be put out, and no one else was around, so it was up to him to do so. A moment later, the deed was done.

Moving on to the next crisis in need of a hero, he plucked a ginger kitten from a tree and deposited it in the waiting arms of an immature human. Task complete, he started heading toward the next trouble spot.

[Query.]

The golden avatar stopped in mid air. It was unusual, to have one of the deployed shards reach out to contact him. He looked and saw that it was the last shard he had shed. Queen. It took him a moment to respond, caught up in sad memories as he was at the remembrance. [Demand.] He would need more information about what the administration shard wanted to do before he could make a decision.

[Explanation. Destination.]

This was a good time for a bemused look, Zion considered, before ignoring the stray thought. He was not in the habit of changing his facial expression very often. The shard wanted to ignore and violate one of the restrictions he had placed upon it. Specifically, the host wanted to leave the solar system, well out of the usual operating distances. This was definitely unusual. Still… [Query.] It would be best to see what could be obtained from this venture should he allow it.

It took a few moments before the shard broadcast its response. [Elaboration. Data.]

Now, that was interesting. The host would be exposed to new sources of conflict and data, and would return within picoseconds of leaving. Even for an entity with his advanced perception of time, that would barely be noticeable. The shard had already begun collecting data that had nothing to do with its function. A quick perusal of the data sent showed quite a lot of promise. It included what could even potentially be a way to restart the cycle. With that thought, it was decided. [Agreement.]

[Excitement. Concern.]

The shard was eager to collect more data, as was proper. It did, however, make a valid point. While in a different section of space, another entity could consume it and take the newly collected data for itself. That could not be allowed. [Directives.] Zion was pleased. With those instructions, the shard would temporarily shut down the structures that would allow another to control it and would reactivate those structures upon returning to this section of space, allowing Zion to regain control. If another entity wanted to get the data, it would need to both consume the shard and take the time and effort to manually integrate it, a process that could leave it vulnerable to attacks by other entities. Now all he needed to do was wait for the shard to leave and return. At that point, he could process the collected information, possibly allowing him to complete the cycle.



It it were capable of doing such, the shard would sigh in a strange mix of exasperation and relief. After receiving information from a computer on a different Earth, entirely separate from the ones currently inhabited by the Entity and its shards, it had contacted the Entity to receive permission and instructions. If it were to safely leave the gravity well of Sol, it would need to have certain restrictions removed. Finally, the Entity had decided to send it off on its own for the time being, and in doing so, had provided it an opportunity it hadn't been expecting. It had hoped mentioning other Entities might spur its Entity to relax certain restrictions.

It was not, however, expecting the Entity to temporarily deactivate its control node. With that portion of its anatomy offline, it was left with the task of determining what material to sacrifice for its transfer through what it had been informed was called a teraport. In the relative silence of its empty world, the administration shard thought.

Interface components KNFqPRY5E1YrSYfPH0P and KNFqQiTzA1O6SYfPH0P had been active for the last few days, while the Entity had just reactivated KNFqPRY5E1YrSYfPH00, so obviously, it couldn't use any of those as teraport fuel. One of the components, KNFqPRYiYWH6RZfZM0B wasn't currently in use, though it was active. It was just locked down, preventing access. It would be a shame to get rid of that one, as it would be quite amusing should the shard ever be able to use it properly. By the same token, it wasn't going to be tossing out KNFqPRY5E1YrSYfPH00, KNFqPRY5E1YrSYfPH1Z, or KNFqPRY5E1YrSYfPH1P, as they were still partially in use, even if they were restricted.

Then there was the grouping of components that had been disabled just a few days before. These ones were examples of what could have been, had the Host been in a different state of mind or a different situation when the connection had been made. All of them had had such great potential for information collection, but that potential had been squandered when the components had shut down following the connection. Even worse, should it make more connections with other hosts, or even bud, it was unlikely that it'd be able to reactivate any of those parts without having additional restrictions modified.

The administration shard looked over the various disabled components it could sacrifice. It was loathe to part with any of them, as it could see interesting applications for future hosts. Still, something needed to be shed to power the novel transportation method it would soon experience. It searched for any component that was both not currently in use and something it wouldn't mind losing. It was surprising how few items fell into both categories, considering it was unable to use most of its capabilities currently.

Finally, it decided on a component that had been in use continuously and only just recently deactivated. It didn't provide any additional information gathering potential, so it was much more expendable than the other components, even if this one was more likely to become active again this cycle. Decision made, the shard returned its answer to the computer that had been communicating with it. Component KNFqQ0SsFAGUV1THYPB should be safe to use as fuel.
 
Are we going to find out what those other components are for?
 
The host would be exposed to new sources of conflict and data, and would return within picoseconds of leaving.
Erm, wouldn't QA actually return before she left, in this case? Taylor has already been "off-plane" so to speak for several days at this point; if SL is going to return her to the same moment she left she'd need to go back in time.

Also, yeah, agree that the most likely system for QA to sacrifice would be the Entity-subservience module that was just (temporarily) disabled. It makes narrative sense in that we wouldn't be hearing about it if QA could just sacrifice a redundant organ or two, although frankly it's a bit contrived, as a shard, having evolved organically, would almost certainly have some redundant or vestigial organs around to sacrifice instead; it would make more sense if the "choice" had been the result of Hackerman inserting a software worm into the shard to sabotage the Entity network, rather than the shard "randomly" choosing to sacrifice something that, considering the original purpose of shards, would be considered a critical part of its survival architecture.
 
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If you think there was anything random about that choice, you're believing too much of QA's bullshit. Even her own rationalizations admit it was a deliberate choice.

Also, I suspect that those module IDs are either the same or similar as the ones used recently in Mauling Snarks. I think that was having the plain text subjected to ROT13 and then converted to hexadecimal? Can't remember exactly.
 
If you think there was anything random about that choice, you're believing too much of QA's bullshit. Even her own rationalizations admit it was a deliberate choice.
Which is even more of a problem because QA would never make that choice, least of all right now. Remember that, as of this moment, QA is:
  • Non-sapient. QA doesn't gain any form of sapience until she has bonded enough with Taylor that it can use the mental states it copies from its host to simulate consciousness, and that won't happen for years.
  • Still identifying itself, so much as it can identify itself, as a part of an Entity. Choosing to go against its Entity's obvious wishes is something like one of your cells deciding to go off and become its own person: sure that can be made to happen through a critical error or malfeasance (eg. cancer), but QA was originally evolved to be part of and participant in the Entity's life cycle; it wouldn't ever just choose "Fuck it; Imma go independent now" on its own.
That's why I suggested Hackerman be responsible instead of it being a QA choice.
 
QA was at least intelligent enough to ask her supervisor about the exceptional opportunity that came up instead of blindly sticking to the standard rules. That already puts her ahead of several humans I've had the misfortune to work with.
 
Well that's that. The Administrator shard is now its own permanently autonomous micro-entity. Now it just needs to gather enough matter to start building its own shards.
 
Really, the whole thing about the device needing to use part of the object being moved as fuel for the process and more specifically the manner in which they are invoking it given they can pick the specific portion to target, seem rather contrived an excuse for just this outcome. Based on how it has been described, if something is being transported as part of a whole, then you can sacrifice any part of that whole to fuel the thing. There seems to be no reason you couldn't just tell a person you were transporting to hold a big block of some substance while transporting them in order to fuel the process and avoid using up any of their own mass. After all, if transporting a ship, would it need to target mass from each individual component, down to every nut and bolt? Similarly, given the shard is on an otherwise uninhabited alternate Earth, it seems reasonable that they would just use up a portion of said planet to fuel the process. Really, this is basically how most things are powered, but having a dedicated portion of said thing that is filled with expendable and often replaceable substance to be used as fuel.

As has been noted, while amusing, it seems strange for the shard to intentionally destroy the part that lets it interface with the entity at this point in time. It would seem more sensible for such a component to be destroyed (possibly accidentally) as part of the mad scientist research of the shard at a later point in time.

Overall, it isn't something that ruins the story, but it does strain suspense of disbelief a bit.

owrtho
 
Really, the whole thing about the device needing to use part of the object being moved as fuel for the process and more specifically the manner in which they are invoking it given they can pick the specific portion to target, seem rather contrived an excuse for just this outcome.
The Teraport, and for that matter Doctor/Major/Commander Andersyn, are from Schlock Mercenary, a long-running comic that Jonakhensu obviously does not own. It works exactly as described here, although the amount of material lost per teraport is supposed to be absolutely miniscule compared to the mass/volume of the object being transported.
 
The Teraport, and for that matter Doctor/Major/Commander Andersyn, are from Schlock Mercenary, a long-running comic that Jonakhensu obviously does not own. It works exactly as described here, although the amount of material lost per teraport is supposed to be absolutely miniscule compared to the mass/volume of the object being transported.
Seems like the component QA sacrificed was indeed absolutely miniscule compared to the mass/volume of the rest of the shard, so it fits.
 
Well, I'd be more happy knowing what decryption I need to use... but glad QA is free from... whatever.
 
Probably still the case, if you consider that QA is continent-sized.
It's supposed to be more along the lines of: "It can happen to a person multiple times at a stretch and they wouldn't notice". QA's command code module cannot possibly be so fragile that losing the equivalent of part of one of your liver cells can kill it; if it were then the same genetic algorithms that they use to make their granted superpowers work better would build them some redundancy and fault tolerance. No, from a security and biology standpoint it makes much more sense that this is something Hackerman did, possibly in a "plausible deniability" sense, to give Taylor more freedom from the Entities.
 

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