OverMaster's Little Crummy Corner of Sub-Par Writing

No, I've never seen that show.

---

One for the Books.

"Good afternoon, Haruna," Negi said, approaching the front desk. "I come for a book on-- HARUNA!"

Haruna blinked at him. "A book on me?"

"What, why are you wearing that thing?!" he cried, pointing at her. "It's against the academy's dress code!"

"Oh, this," Haruna said, looking down at her solid black string swimsuit, a thin onepiece barely covering her vagina and nipples. "The Headmistress approved it."

Negi facepalmed hard. "This wouldn't have happened under Konoemon-sensei... Why, though?!"

Haruna smiled while Shiori passed behind her, sobbing inside of the paper bag covering her head, wearing a micro pink bikini mostly made of diminutive ribbons, and pushing a large cart of books. "Well, you know! We're in the digital era and nobody will come here for physical books anymore! The Philistines, they think just looking things up in the internet is the same..."

"And that's why..." Negi trailed off dryly, while a mortified Shizuka passed by, wearing a duo of spandex strips covering her breasts and crotch, and trying to hide her face behind the books she was moving.

"Yes!" Haruna grinned. "This is the only way we can get people to come here now!"

From where she sat filing reference cards with Nodoka, both clad in naught but copies of Kuroko's bikini, Yue sighed. "By the way, Sensei, we still aren't getting enough female visitors, so we were thinking of asking you to pitch in with help through weekends at the very least..."

 

JK Haru is Ala Alba in Another World.

"You brought a literal prostitute here?!" Louise yelled.

"I had to save her," argued Negi. "She was going to be killed by a gang of criminals..."

"But you had to bring her here afterwards?!" Chisame demanded.

"The criminals would just come back for her after I left," Negi said. "Unless you think I should have killed them...?"

"No, you should have taken me there, and I'd have killed them," Tsukuyomi said. "What were you doing in a brothel anyway?"

"It's Mr. Rakan's fault!" the exasperated Negi said. "I thought he was taking me for the local equivalent to a karaoke!"

"You wanted to sing in public?" Skuld said. "Have you gone that sociopathic? You'd kill dozens, your singing voice is hideous!"

"Really, even I wouldn't do that if I had a voice like his," Tsukuyomi agreed, nodding.

"And she also saved me, returning the favor," Negi continued, "so I'm indebted to her..."

"No, I'm pretty sure that if you saved her first, all that means is that you're even," Yue said. "How did she even save you?"

"Um, she took the captain of the guard who came to arrest the criminals away to a room and convinced him to let me go," Negi said, a bit more nervous now. "Think about it, if I was taken to jail, then I'd have transformed back before being let go! They'd know I'm Negi!"

Nodoka sighed. "We can't argue with that, I guess, but even so..."

"Hey, I heard Negi brought someone else here?" Rito said, entering the room from the side door. "Who is it this-- Eeeeep!" he gulped, stumbling and falling face first into Haru's bossom.

"That'll be twenty pieces," Haru said evenly.

"By the way, Negi," Kotaro said, "what if those guys are let out and they just kill the other women in that brothel out of spite? Did you even think of that?"

"Why do you even doubt your friend?" Haru asked, counting the coins Rito had just given her. "We left Madam, Kizuha and Lupe in the living room, how many guest rooms do you have here anyway?"

 

Just Another Beach Business.

Saruyama Kenichi stood behind a seaside stall. Only the upper half of his body was visible, but he clearly was thrusting his hips in place, as his eyes rolled back and his mouth drooled.

Kotegawa Yui stomped towards the stand and angrily slammed a hand on the counter several times.

Koyama Haru's head peeked out from under the counter, sporting a frown.

"What?" she asked Yui, wiping her own lips with the back of a fist. "Can't one just make some money during vacations, now?"

 

Konoe Konoka: Caster.

"Make way!" Mordred shouted, bringing an unconscious Ritsuka in her arms. "Master was wounded in that Singularity!"

Nightingale began moving towards them. "I will quickly evaluate this--"

Konoka outraced her. "I'll handle it!"

---

"Hmmm," Nightingale took Beowulf's pulse, and then his temperature. "I believe I will have to amputate."

"That's fine, I can fight on with only one arm! It's just going to make it more of a challenge!" the Berserker said.

Konoka moved to the bed. "No need, Beo-sama! I'll heal you immediately!"

---

Nightingale took the candy from Jack and Nursery Rhyme, wagging a finger at them. "No, no. These sweets have no nutritive value, and they are hazardous for your health."

Konoka came, smiling and holding a tray of pastries. "That's fine, girls! These homemade treats are sugar free!"

---

"... is that it?" Kiara asked after listening to her story. "You should have sex with her so you can settle your feelings of inadequacy towards her. Naturally, I offer myself to mediate."

Nightingale frowned and got up from the couch. "We really need to summon Doctor Freud or Jung already!"

"I quite agree!" said Saber Sakurazaki Setsuna, who had been listening from behind the door.

 

How not to Organize a Six-Way.

Negi and Shirou sat naked on the bed, side by side, watching and also bare Asuna and Luvia fight the likewise unclad Rin and Ayaka.

"You know," Shirou said eventually, "it's kinda funny, I'd thought that Rin would side with Asuna-kun, and Luvia would team up with Ayaka-kun."

Negi shrugged quietly. "Have you ever heard of 'Too alike for comfort'?" He sighed. "Girls, what if we just decide who goes first with a nice game of charades, or scissors-paper-ro--"

Luvia swung a leg back and her foot forcefully closed his mouth.

 

OverMaster Writes for Every Franchise in Existence.

---

The Flintstones.

"Oh, Fred, Fred!" Barney lamented as they walked back home from the bowling hall. "What are we gonna do?! No matter how much we try, Betty and I still can't have children! Have I failed as a husband?"

Fred sighed very heavily. "Barney," he said. "If it's any comfort, it's not your fault. Don't berate yourself for it! If Betty could have kids, she would have had them by now. Trust me on this."

"Oh, Fred!" Barney said. "Thank you, you're a real friend!"

"I know, Barney, I know..." Fred said, and walked into his own house.

Barney approached the Rubble front door, then paused right before opening it.

He stroke his chin thoughtfully, frowned, and a large question mark appeared over his head.

 

Technicality.

"Momo," Nana said while frowning. "Don't you think that bikini is too small?"

"Of course not, Nana!" she told her twin. "This isn't a small bikini!"

"But it barely covers your--"

"It's spray paint!" Momo said with pride, turning around to show her goods off.

"DAAAAAAAD!" Nana called out angrily.

Alas, Gid was too busy checking out Hakubi Ryoko's own spray paint number.

 

A Question of Convenience.

Yamanaka Ino stared at them over her sunglasses. "No," she told them. "Not only it doesn't work that way, but I can't teach it to you over the course of a weekend!"

"Awwwwww!" Anya Cocolova and Passionlip said.

 

We can Find You anywhere.

Ikari Shinji sat on the sand, smiling as he saw Rider and Zazie Rainday talking. Rider did most of the talking, of course.

Then something rose from the sea, startling him. It was a towering, Cyclopean, inhuman, collossal, oblong, marble-like, twisted yet smooth, awesome ship of sorts, shaped like pillar or rather a humanoid figure. Yes, it was that alien and difficult to describe. I've lost 59 San points attempting to do it.

A tall man in ancient garments, whose lower face was a thick mass of gray swarming tentacles, came out, stepping from inside the object, and standing on it. He gestured at the trembling boy and said "Grrrrhhhtt thhh! Thhhhyyyayth sygurez mrakkha! Rrraahhhhs!"

"What, what is he saying?!" Shinji said.

Zazie hummed quietly. "He says 'Shinji, get in the fucking robot'."

Shinji got up and ran down the surf, screaming.

 

What's the Big Deal, Though.

"You've got to do it," Rakan told him, pointing at the hole in the wall.

"Why? It's unbecoming," Negi dared challenging him.

"It's the manly thing to do!" Rakan huffed.

"Kotaro fancies himself very manly and he agrees with me that it's rude and vulgar," Negi said.

"Kotaro's a brat! It's the manly AND mature thing to do!" Rakan grumbled.

"Eishun-sama is as mature as anyone I've ever met can be, and he says this is bad and--"

"Damn it! It's what your father would do!" Rakan screamed.

Negi sighed. "You only needed to say that." He fastened the towel tied around his waist, leaned down, and finally peeked through the peephole.

Eventually he turned back to Jack. "It's nothing I don't see already every time I sneeze!"

Rakan began pulling on his own hair. "AAAAAHHHHHHH!"

---

Decadent Spirou.

Fantasio chuckled, reading through the latest volume of Le Petit Spirou. "You were a riot when you were a kid! Hard to believe it's you, though! Back then you were so wild and horny, and now you're so formal...!"

Spirou blinked. "Huh? No, I think you're mistaken. That's not me. It's my son!"

Fantasio gaped. "You have a son and wife?! And you never told me?!"

"I thought you knew. I show up every so often, after all."

"I thought this guy was your father!"

"Why would I look just like my father? I'm not his clone!" Spirou said.

"You look just like your son, though! Dammit, Spirou! We've been friends since 1944! Yet you never talked to me about your family!"

Spirou rubbed the back of his own head. "You'll see... I don't like to talk a lot about my private life..."

Fantasio huffed. "And why does your wife also look just like you anyway?"

The rubbing became even more uneasy. "Why do you think the boy looks just like us, I never show my face up in that comic, and I don't want to talk about my family life?"

 

Onscreen Group Sex!

"Master," Hokusai said, approaching Ritsuka and Shielder in her white bikini. "I need you to help me find Father."

"You lost him?!" Ritsuka gasped, getting up from the beach towel.

Hokusai nodded.

"But how?" Shielder asked. "You are the same Servant! You should be able to feel him anywhere!"

"Well, maybe I should have phrased myself better," Hokusai allowed as she led them down the beach. "As a matter of fact, I know where he is right now, sort of, but..."

The Foreigner gestured to a large pile of squirming and writhing octopi by the seaside. "... perhaps we shouldn't have come to the beach during octopi mating season."

 

Summer Rains.

Shielder stood stoically, hefting the gigantic bulk of Lord Camelot over her head.

Under the shade of said massive shield, Artoria, Shirou, Mordred, Gawain, Lancelot, Bedivere, Gareth and Percival all sat, very closely and uncomfortably huddled together, but at least mostly dry.

"Fret not, my selfless daughter," Lancelot said. "I estimate this light rain will only last half an hour more..."

"I told you not to call me that!" the short haired girl said. "Also, I can't believe no one thought about bringing umbrellas!"

Artoria just kept on glaring angrily at Mordred and Shirou.

 

Drink before you Act.

"I must admit that you have more or less impressed me," Evangeline said, raising an eyebrow. "I'd never met anyone who could keep up with me without being a vampire."

Toga Himiko grinned. "Why, thank you!"

"But I will best you yet!" Eva boasted. "I still can drink a lot more!"

"Whoo! Hoo!" Toga said, lifting her glass and banging it against Eva's. "I like you already, Oneechan! Let's keep on drinking, drinking, drinking!"

Negi's hollowed pale husk began crawling away across the sand, desperately.

 

Universal Truths.

Betty Cooper and Veronica Lodge watched as Cheryl Blossom laughed and flirted with a very handsome black haired young man. Eventually, he excused himself away, and Cheryl smirked as she saw him go.

"Mmm, nice ass," she purred to herself.

Betty and Veronica approached her. "Cheryl, you've just dumped Alexander, and now you're after another guy already?" Veronica asked her.

"Can I help it? It's Dick Grayson! Ward of Bruce Wayne himself!" Cheryl said. "And he's got a thing for redheads. I can tell!"

"Yes, but do you even love him?" Veronica asked.

"Uh... no. What does that have to do with anything?"

"I can't believe you, Cheryl!" Betty said. "Are all of your relationships based on money?"

"Of course they are! That's the truest, most sincere and lasting form of love!" Cheryl replied happily.

"Say what?" Betty asked.

"Think about it!" Cheryl said. "Romantic love can end easily because of many things, big or small. He grows old, you grow old, someone else appears, the magic is just gone, you've become more like siblings, your life callings are too different... you name it! But love of money? That only ever fades if the money goes away!"

"And what if you just find someone with even more money?" Betty asked, sure that she had her now.

Cheryl smiled. "Oh, Betty, you silly thing! Then you love them both, of course!"

And she walked away, wiggling her thong clad ass.

After several moments, Veronica sighed. "I hate it when she's right...!"

Betty rolled her eyes back.

 

Demons are Different.

"Poor Zazie-chan!" Sakurako giggled. "She got sunburned!"

"Eh?" Misa said. "How could that even be?! She's a demon, and she's already tanned to start with! You're pulling my leg, Saku!"

Sakurako smiled and pointed. "See by yourself!"

Misa followed the finger with her eyes and saw Zazie standing by the sea, her skin fully white and her hair solid black.

"I'm not even trying to figure out how that works," Misa said.

---

Apex Predator.

Hakari approached her. "Kurumi-chan, we need to talk," she told her. "Greenpeace just called me. Since we brought you here, fifteen species of local sealife have entered the Endangered list!"

Haraga Kurumi looked up from the large grill of seafood she was preparing. "Eh?" she asked, blinking and still chewing on a tentacle.

 

Unequally Mundus Magicus, Alternate Epilogue.

"Oh, guys!" Ku Fei grinned. "Great to see you again, how have you, ummmm..."

She trailed off, seeing Negi smile meekly while Ayaka, Chisame, Konoka, Setsuna, Asuna, Yue, Nodoka, Haruna, Misora, Haruka, Yukino, Yuuna, Makie, Lala, Misa, Madoka and Sakurako all kept their hands on their large pregnant bellies. Ayaka and Konoka smiled proudly.

Chizuru facepalmed. Ako hiccuped, then fainted. Kazumi smiled and began taking pictures. Kaede let out a long whistle.

Mikan frowned at the also very pregnant Riko. "I'm sure there's a very interesting story behind this, 'Oniichan'."

"None that you can hear for the next six years at the very least!" Riko snapped.

 

The Archetype.

"Clark," Lois said, entering the room. "Clark, some people have come to throw you a Father's Day party..."

Clark blinked, and looked up from his computer. "Father's Day?" he said, confused, before staring out the window.

A-Ko, Apollo, Hyperion, Sentry, Captain Hero, Mighty Mouse, Underdog, Super Sam, Son Goku, Great Saiyaman, All Might, Saitama, Homelander, Captain Marvel, Miracleman, Bizarro, Steel, Superboy, Supergirl, Superwoman, Mr. Majestic, Icon, Captain Carrot, Gladiator, Super Soldier, Public Spirit, Supreme, Suprema, Stardust, Superduperman, Samaritan, Omni-Man, True-Man, SuperGoof, Comet Guy, Meteor Man, Super Rabbit, Stupor Duck, Major Glory, Metro Man and Lethargic Lad all stood on the lawn, waiting.

Clark took both hands to his head. "Tell them I'm off planet."

"Over half of them have X-Ray vision and superhearing, Clark..." Lois reminded him.

 

Father's Day.

Negi stood with his head low and a hand set on the trunk of the World Tree.

"Father..." he said, sniffling a broken sob.

Chisame approached him from behind, stopping a few steps away, along with Misa, Ayaka, Misora, Haruka, Yukino, Shiori, Louise, Yuuna, Yue, Natsumi, Touko and Collet.

"Negi," Chisame said. "Happy Father's Day."

He turned back to them. "Thank you, but... How can I feel good about this date, when my father is still--"

Each one of them took a hand to her respective belly.

Negi blinked a few times, and then he smiled slowly and widely. "I take that back," he said. "This is the happiest day of my life."

And he fainted.

Watching from afar, Haruna and Nodoka looked at each other. "Don't you feel bad now that Kikukawa-sensei takes part in this kind of scenarios while you don't?"

Nodoka sighed. "I'm still there, kind of, in a Noto Mamiko way, Paru..."

 

The Struggle of the People.

“Doctor Mikado!” Sasami invited cheerfully. “Let’s go have some ice cream together!”

“I’m sorry, but I can’t,” the woman in the small black bikini said.

“Eeehhh?! But why?!”

“Nothing personal, but you are a princess of Jurai, and I call myself a sympathizer of the cause of universal freedom,” that other Ryoko lectured her. “I can’t partake in capitalist joys with a scion of a royal house spanning centuries. When was the last time your family ever staged any election? Why do they brand any opposition to them space pirates and slaughter them? In the big scheme of things, they are no better than Frieza, or Mongul, or—“

Sasami began making huge watery Bambi eyes.

Ryoko winced. “That won’t work! I won’t succumb to the elite’s emotional manipulation!”

---

They stood by the ice cream stand, a cone in each female’s hand.

“I’ll always regret the day I abandoned my principles for a pair of eyes,” Mikado-sensei said.

Sasami kept on smiling.

 

That Wacky Juvia.

"Hey, Negi!" Kotaro waved and grinned. "You finally got that Juvia chick to stop following you, didn't you?"

A small puddle of water on the sand behind Negi sprouted an eye that stared sternly at Kotaro.

Negi shuddered. "W-Well, not exactly...!"

 

Negi Ball Z- Fusion: The Movie.

"C'mon, Negi. Let's try it!" Kotaro said.

Negi sighed. "All right..."

They stepped apart from each other, did a little dance, and tapped the tips of their fingers together. "Fuuuu-sioooon... HAAAAAA!" they shouted.

Nothing... Nothing Happened.

"See?" Negi asked. "I told you it wouldn't work!"

"Aw, man!" Kotaro grumbled. He blinked at the approaching Skuld and Dana. "Hey, Megamichan, Prof, what are we doing wrong with the fusion dance? Why can't Negi and I fuse to augment our power?"

"What?" Skuld said. "You idiot! Are you believing what you saw in a manga again? There's no way something as dumb as that can ever work!"

"Oh, I know!" Kotaro said. "The dance's not the way, we need some Potara rings, don't we? I'm sure Prof can give us some...!"

"Nonsense, that's just cartoon folly as well," Dana said. "Why would turning you into a singular being multiply your power? That would only reduce it so it can befit a single body, or at best it'd leave the single you just as strong as the two of you were on your own!"

Kotaro blinked. "But... I thought Dragon Ball was canon for this continuity?"

"I sure would hope it is," Bulma commented from where she was sunbathing.

Skuld smiled. "Kotaro... if you want to share your body with Negi, there are other, easier, actual ways..."

That was when Juvia punched Kotaro in the face.

"I hate this mixed up alternate gag continuity!" he decided.

 

Negi Ball Z The Movie: Fusion Reborn.

Kotaro and Yue sat by the sea.

"Man, what a bummer!" the boy groaned. "It turns out fusing doesn't work after all!"

"It stands to reason that if it did, Ala Rubra and Cosmo Entelecheia would have done extensive use of the technique, doesn't it?" Yue asked.

"We had thought this really cool name for the fusion, too!" he kept on ranting, not really listening to her.

"Is that the kind of 'we' that actually means an 'I'?" Yue asked.

He frowned at her. "What are you trying to say here, Chibi?"

"Nothing. What was the name of the fusion, then?"

"Kogi!"

"And why not Negaro?"

"You crazy? It was my idea, why would I let him be on top?!"

"Skuld was right, this really is all about sharing your body with Negi..."

 

Grace Under(wear) Pressure.

"You know, Sylia," Priss began, "as a musician, I can understand the need to promote yourself and your product everywhere. But..."

"But, Priss?" Sylia Stingray said elegantly, sipping from her cocktail.

"You didn't have to come to the beach wearing your own lingerie instead of a swimsuit!" Priss answered.

"Hey, I'm not the only one doing it..." Sylia said. The men kept on staring and staring at her.

"Now, now! You paid us to help sell your brand!" Linna said, sitting next to the mortified Nene.

 

In All her Finery.

"Konoka-san, since you are an Ojou..." Negi began.

She raised a hand and smiled. "Please, Negi-kun, don't call me that! I'm just your friendly dorm companion Oneechan!"

"Well, yes, thank you very much, but can you do 'that'?" he asked her.

Konoka blinked. "Oh," she said after a moment. "You mean 'that' thing. Well, actually--"

"She can't do it, of course," Asuna said from where she sat playing her videogame. "She isn't that kind of girl!"

"In reality, I can do it, but I don't like it very much..." Konoka said sheepishly, rubbing the back of her head.

"I see," Negi said. "Forget I said anything, then, I was only curious."

Konoka sighed. "Well, if Negi-kun wants to see it, I can do it, I guess!"

"Would you do it for me?" Negi asked.

"Yes, of course!" Konoka smiled and then took a hand primly to her mouth. She let out a haughty laugh to match those of Kuno Kodachi and Luviagelita Edelfelt. "OHHHHH, HO HO HO HO! OHHHH, HO HO HO HO!"

"Wow...!" the awed boy said.

Asuna's jaw slackened. "Whoa! It's even better than Iinchou's. Or worse, I suppose... No offense..."

"None taken. Now if you excuse me, I'll go take a hot bath," Konoka said, and she headed for the bathroom.

 

Negima vs. Evangelion!

"Kaji-sensei? He's not bad, but he can't compare to Takahata-sensei!" Asuna said.

"What?! Dumb girl, take that back! Kaji-sensei is the smoothest teacher in this school!" Asuka said.

"Pffft, can he fight using martial arts? Is he muscular, or a scrawny mess? Look at him! Takahata-sensei not only is more cultured, he's also fit as--"

"Scrawny? Do you need those mismatched eyes fixed, skank?!" Asuka shrieked. "Besides, Kaji-sensei doesn't need that kung fu bull, he's a trained--"

"Girls, what's with all that noise?" Shizuna asked, approaching them along a curious Misato. "We could hear you all the way from the cafeteria!"

"Minamoto-sensei, you're the woman I wanted to see!" Asuna said. "You dated Takahata-sensei for a while, tell this loudmouth jerk how cool and strong and intelligent he is!"

"Misato, you went steady with Kaji-sensei for what, years?" Asuka growled. "Tell Princess Dumbass here how much more macho and suave he is than Death Glasses!"

Minamoto sighed. "Girls, actually, you shouldn't fight for something like that..."

"Yeah," Misato gave a nod. "There's a reason why we left them, after all."

The teenagers blinked as one. "Ah?"

---

Laying naked in bed together, smoking pensively after union, Ryoji and Takamichi shivered.

"You just felt it too, huh?" Takahata asked.

"Yeah. This can't be good. Guess I'll go ask Ikari to give us some urgent overseas assignment right now..."

 

Categories of Evil.

"Hey, Chisame," Mordred said, approaching her. "You're an Internet expert, aren't you?"

Chisame looked away from the screen reluctantly, fixing her gaze on the blonde. "N-Nooooo..."

Mordred squinted at Chisame's red eyes. "How many hours have you been sitting there?"

"What do you want to know?" Chisame asked curtly.

"Well, for starters, what is this 'Dark Web' I heard about?"

There was a pause. Then a sigh. "It's just some really messed up--"

"And while we are at it, what are NFTs?" Mordred added.

Chisame's face paled starkly. After several moments of silence, she squeezed the blonde's shoulders tightly. "That..." she said stiffly, "that is the greatest evil in the Internet!"

 

Negima vs. Fate Grand Order!

"Hey, Atalanta-sama!" someone called out.

She turned around, seeing a wiry girl with very short hair approaching her with a grin. "Um, yes, that's me. You are... one of Professor Negi's students, right?"

"I'm Kasuga Misora! Mo-san told me you're a legendary runner, so I want to ask for a race, please!"

"Mo-san? Oh... Right, Mordred. Um, listen, I'm not one to race just for anything, and not to boast, but I don't think you'd stand any chance..."

"That remains to be seen!" she said proudly. "My Pactio with Negi-kun gives me some REAL serious superspeed! I'm actually faster than him, you know!"

"That's fine, but even if you were a match, really, there's a good reason why I don't like to give matches, not that kind of matches anyway..."

"Ah, c'mon! It can't be that you're afraid of losing! Skuld told me that you'd never back away from a challenge, that it'd make Artemis-chan disappointed!"

Atalanta's eyes burned of a sudden. "And why do you call her '-chan'...?!"

---

"And she humbled you, right?" Chisame asked. "Good riddance."

"No no no no!" Misora whined. "I actually beat her! That's even worse! Now I'm engaged to her...!"

"I always told you that you should read more on mythology, especially once we began socializing with gods," Negi lectured sagely.

 

Remembering Muriel.

One day, Anya showed up on Nana's doorstep.

"Hey, good morning!" Nana smiled. She and Anya got along actually very well, other than Nana's disapproval over Anya's treatment of Chamo. They always bonded over being exasperated by dumb boys and busty cows. "What can I do for you?"

"Hello, Princess Nana," Anya smiled back. Uneasily, she handed him a small cute dog. "Um, you can talk to animals, so could you please look into what's troubling my familiar? Ever since I got him, he sometimes will get very sad for no apparent reason, looking towards the West and howling for hours..."

Nana blinked. "Um, sure, but can't you, Negi and Nodoka read his mind?"

"No, we can't read animal minds," Anya said. "They are a completely different thing."

From the corner where they were playing cards, Chamo, Artemis, Luna, Yoruichi, Blair and Felicia stared silently at her.

"I mean non talking animals, geez!" Anya growled.

Nana sighed. "Come back tomorrow and I'll have an answer by then."

The next day, Anya knocked on the door. Nana's twin opened it.

"Good afternoon," Anya said. "I came for Courage. Has Nana finished looking into him by now?"

Momo paused. "Yes. Yes, I think she has. But I don't think they are finished yet."

"What do you mean?"

Upstairs, in Nana's bedroom, she and the small dog hugged each other tightly and wept.

 

Dino Sore!

"... and what is this?" Chisame asked after several moments of silence.

"It's a goodwill gift from Lord Plunder..." Negi said meekly, still holding the tiny dinosaur before her.

"Who the heck is that?" Chisame asked, struggling hard to contain herself.

"Also known as Ka-Zar, Lord of the Savage Land," Negi gulped. The baby T-Rex squirmed in his hands. He held it still gently. "We'll need mining resources from his territories, so we have been negotiating with him..."

"He can't stay," Chisame said curtly.

"Actually, she's a baby girl..."

"Even less so, then! I don't know how and I don't want to think about it, but she'd end up falling for you! It's a freaking Tyrannosaurus, it's going to be bigger than this apartment in less than one year!"

"But I can't just return her, that'd be an insult to Lord Plunder!" Negi said.

Chisame frowned and tapped a foot down. "There must be a place where we can leave her..."

---

Nana blinked. "For me?"

Negi smiled and nodded. "Yes, for you."

She blushed, accepting the baby in her arms. "Oh, oh, Prince Negi! I, I'm flattered...!"

Mikan, Nao, Rito, Momo and Lala watched not so discreetly from the next room.

"Awwww!" Momo cooed to herself. "I know it goes against your harem plan, Rito-sama, but they look so cute together...!"

"I have no problems with this," Rito said magnanimously.

"Good. That means you're cleaning after its messes," Nao told him curtly.

Nana lifted her high and laughed. "I think I'll call you Tina!"

 

Harmful Cultural Stereotypes.

"It's beautiful," Chisame had to admit, even though she wasn't an outdoors person. "So very scenic..."

"Why, thank you!" Nekane smiled while guiding them through the wide fields. "We are very proud of having kept Wales traditional and comfortable no matter what. Some things have changed, of course, but..."

She trailed off as she saw Negi blinking and beginning to walk towards Ole Mc Connell's property, full of sheep peacefully eating grass everywhere in sight.

The blonde sighed, grabbed Negi by the head, and turned him around, so he was back on the same pathway as the girls. He kept on walking with a small blush.

"Apologies," Nekane offered for him to Chisame. "He's still a Welsh man, after all. The call of instinct."

"Uhhhhhh," Chisame said.