With This Ring (Young Justice SI) (Thread Fourteen)

[DonLyn]

M'gann's head is the first to turn back to me. "Ah? What was that?"

Wallace shakes his head. "You putting that on T.V., Oh El? Like..? For real?"

"Yep."

"'cause if you run to the T.V. company's offices real fast they might give you your money back."

Robert looks around the seating. "I thought it was alright?"

Oliver raises his hands. "Save your final judgements to the end. There's still three more to go."

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Don't listen to the naysayers! The ad is brilliant!

 

[Bigking321]

It's a funny ad and would probably go viral.

I just don't think it would sell many candy bars.

"Heh. Funny commercial."

"Gonna buy one?"

"Hell no."

 

[RichardWhereat]

Those amongst my colleagues who have heard this rant before as still images of a pool of vomit and a dog's posterior briefly flash up on the screen.

Click to shrink...

They what? Those amongst your colleagues who have heard this rant before.. what?

 

[Darko]

In the next Invincible segment, Zoat has the chance to do the funniest thing and have it be that Paul is Conquests only friend (from Conquest's PoV). And meeting this alternate Conquests brings up the trauma of their 'friendship' from Paul's PoV.

Invincible: "Lantern, go have fun (distract) with Conquest while I speak with the Mark of this Universe. You got along great with our universes."

Paul: *Internally screaming 'not again!'* "Certainly, Invincible."

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Paul: Okay. I managed to somehow regrow my body in that split second my brain was still working after he ripped off my head, so hopefully I can do that again.

a pool of vomit and a dog's posterior briefly flash up on the screen

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Nothing sells chocolate faster than vomit and a dogs ass.

And we won't judge you at all for preferring it." … "Externally." Me looks a little sad. "Internally? We're judging you. We're judging you a lot

Click to shrink...

Paul: We're British. Judging people Internally is basically the only thing we're good at.

They've never actually met. With Nolan's take over being successful, there was never any reason to send Conquest to Earth. I did half-think about him serving as a foster grandparent to his and Anissa's child, but it doesn't seem plausible.

Click to shrink...

Yeah, given his little speech to Mark, I doubt any Viltrumite wants him around their kids.

 

[Chojin Patriarch]

22nd June 2013
19:32

Oliver smiles at me as we head upwards towards the mountain's living area. "Nervous?"

I shrug, then shake my head. "No, no, I don't mind making a fool of myself. If they don't laugh at me then I'll be worried."

Click to shrink...

Heck, he's done it often enough they probably have it out of their system by now. We all remember the Cake Man Incident .At least this time, it's presumably intentional. Hopefully.

Spoiler: Commentary spoilered for length

"They're not an entirely representative audience. I know the marketing industry took a real beating, but we can still get hold of enough people to do regular test screenings."

"Is there some problems I'm not seeing?"

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Ad, advertising. Fools being led by numbers and often too afraid to push limits... But when they do, that's when you get fun stuff.

"British commercials can be a little… Unique. I think it'll work well in Britain, and maybe in Europe, I just don't know… Oh hey, Arte!"

Artemis looks away from the microwave where she's heating popcorn. "Hey Ollie. Paul, when did you find time to shoot a commercial?"

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Heck, have you seen Australian ads? There's some crazy stuff out there, all the way back to the seventies or so. Though if you're thinking of that ad, we call them prawns, not shrimp.

"It wasn't that hard. Pinewood Studios isn't exactly over-employed at the moment, and the script was mostly off-the-cuff. And… Cadbury's is an increasingly large part of international trade, so I do actually.. keep more track of it than you might assume."

The microwave beeps, and she pulls out the bag and pours it into a prepared bowl.

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Honestly, he could probably have created ads in all-CG using the Ring. It wouldn't even be hard.

"I'm not sure it's… Worth that. I mean, it's only a couple of minutes."

She shrugs as she bins the bag and picks up the bowl. "We can catch a movie after. And if your commercial is really stupid I can just throw it at you."

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...That's fair. Both the movie and the tossing things.

"My board representative had to sign off on it too."

Oliver grins as he raises his hands. "Oh, don't try blaming this on me. You're the one who decided to direct and star in his own ad campaign."

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Well, it's not the craziest thing 'The Cake Man' has done. Which is probably how most people will see it.

Artemis frown. "Wait, how many are there?"

"Four, but they all have the same structure with a couple of differences in the scenes."

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Easily adjusted regional variants, or content guideline restrictions, I bet.

"'Scenes'? How long are they?"

"Just a couple of minutes." I shrug. "Shot differences. I don't know; I didn't do media studies."

Click to shrink...

Though I presume an individual ad is around thirty seconds? More than that and people just want it gone. Or you go the Japanese route of five to ten seconds of 'wut?'-worthy stuff and a shot of the product.

She shakes her head as we move into the living room, head turning to greet us.

"Thank you everyone for coming. I'll be handing out samples of the product at the conclusion of the viewing-."

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Chocolate bars? I bet that'll get their attention. Especially Wally's.

"So if we run early-" Richard grins. "-we don't get anything."

"There are no flies on either of us. And given some of the missions we've been on, I'm sure you can put up with me making a fool of myself for a few minutes."

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They've probably seen worse.

Wallace shifts over as Artemis plonks herself down next to him, wrapping one arm around her and grabbing popcorn with the other without looking. "Do Cadbury's sell Christmas cake?"

"Yes, but only seasonally." I take a data stick out of subspace as Oliver takes position at the rear of the group, arms folded across his chest. Then I walk forwards and plug the stick into the rear of the television before retreating to the side. "If whoever had the control pad would be so good?"

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That would be a fun angle: 'We do our Christmas Cake to Orange Lantern's high standards!'

Kaldur raises it, moves the cursor to the new file and presses play.

The first thing on the screen is a full-colour recreation of a Cadbury's factory from the 1900s, when the company first started using condensed milk and their chocolate actually started tasting nice. It's not taken from a living museum or a coloration of old footage, just something I made using old technical and architectural plans and my ring, but it makes the point well.

Click to shrink...

I assume he didn't do that for the whole ad to ensure people get paid for filming work.

My voice over starts immediately.

"In nineteen oh four, Cadbury's began using condensed milk in place of powdered milk, resulting in a chocolate of a far smoother consistency."

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'A glass and a half in every bar', as the ads always love to say.

Nothing for two seconds, then the screen switches to me in my hastily redecorated office in Bourneville. I'm standing in front of my desk, just off centre of the shot.

"Meanwhile some of our American colleagues couldn't quite get the hang of the process of creating condensed milk, and managed to induce increased levels of bacterial growth and an increase in the levels of butyric acid. Other sources of butyric acid include…"

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Which makes all those 'Americans try British chocolate' reaction videos online so amusing.

Those amongst my colleagues who have heard this rant before as still images of a pool of vomit and a dog's posterior briefly flash up on the screen. Then the camera pulls back to reveal that both images are framed images on my desk… With a Hershey's bar resting between then.

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...Well, that's making quite a point. Better hope Hershey's don't sue. then again, he's rich enough to bury them in the courts.

The me on the screen looks down at it for a moment, then turns his head to the camera, looks awkward for about a second, and then without looking back picks the bar up and drops it off-camera, where it lands in a metal bin with a microphone-assisted thunk.

The me on-screen smiles awkwardly as the camera zooms in on my face.

"How did that get there?"

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It's got a certain style to it, that's for sure.

Me nods expectantly at the camera and it pulls back, and me walks past the image tableau.

"But over the years it seems that our friends across the Atlantic have grown to rather like the flavour of butyric acid, and the first rule of business is 'don't make it hard for people to give you money'. With that in mind-"

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Oh, no. What horror have they committed in the name of profit?

Me stops at a display, showing a standard Dairy Milk bar on a stand with Union Jacks and a similar bar on a stand next to it with Stars-Spangled Banners both on the packet and decorating the stand.

"-we've created this new bar-"

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Well, certainly appealing to patriotism, at least.

Me reaches down, hesitates to touch the transatlantic chocolate, opts to put a white glove on his right hand and only then picks up the Americanised bar to display it to the zoomed-in camera.

"-to appeal specifically to the American pallet. Such as it is."

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American-style chocolate made by the British? Dear god.

Me looks exceedingly awkwardly at the bar, then raises an eyebrow at looks back at the camera.

"And we won't judge you at all for preferring it." … "Externally." Me looks a little sad. "Internally? We're judging you. We're judging you a lot."

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I half-expect people to eat it out of spite for him.

The closing image uses the decoration on the American display box as the background, with the actual open box as the central focus.

"Cadbury's Dairy Milk America." There's a sound of me sighing. "If you really must."

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...So many spite purchases...

The image freezes, and my colleagues continue to gape.

M'gann's head is the first to turn back to me. "Ah? What was that?"

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...Wonder is Martians use advertising, or if they have some manner of memetic sense-sharing thing instead?

Wallace shakes his head. "You putting that on T.V., Oh El? Like..? For real?"

"Yep."

"'cause if you run to the T.V. company's offices real fast they might give you your money back."

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It's not about money, Wally. It's about the message.

Robert looks around the seating. "I thought it was alright?"

Oliver raises his hands. "Save your final judgements to the end. There's still three more to go."

Click to shrink...

Of course the British kid thinks it's fine. it sounds perfectly humorous.

Heh. How very British of him to do it this way. Practically taunting people into buying stuff. Certainly, I'm sure there have been campaigns designed to make people want to do the thing despite the ad telling them not to. Advertising is a funny thing, though, and the most well-planned campaign can sometimes fall flat despite every number saying it should soar.

 

[Lord Ernest]

That ad was hilarious. Honestly, it would make me want to buy both bars to make a proper comparison. In fact, since people are mentioning social media, that would probably go viral as well; people trying both versions and seeing which they prefer. Then we would have two camps, the snobs that like proper chocolate and the ones that like the 'differently flavored' US one.

Let the Chocolate Wars begin!

 

[Coltsguy]

Ha! I'd buy that for a dollar!

 

[Mr Zoat]

They what? Those amongst your colleagues who have heard this rant before.. what?

Click to shrink...

Thank you, corrected.

Paul: We're British. Judging people Internally is basically the only thing we're good at.

Click to shrink...

[Looks at British legal system]

[Looks at Rule 8]

...

Sure.

Yeah, given his little speech to Mark, I doubt any Viltrumite wants him around their kids.

Click to shrink...

It's like the opposite of Shalltear's speech in Overlord. 'I only measure strength in millimetres, I can't tell the difference the difference between 1 kilometre and 3 kilometres.'

 

[ShadowScion626]

They've never actually met. With Nolan's take over being successful, there was never any reason to send Conquest to Earth. I did half-think about him serving as a foster grandparent to his and Anissa's child, but it doesn't seem plausible.

Click to shrink...

Wait, I'm confused. Didn't Invincible! Paul prove his worth as a mate to Anissa by teleporting Conquest onto Mars and then blowing Conquest (and a large portion Mars itself) up with antimatter? Or was that another Viltrumite?

 

[Darko]

Wait, I'm confused. Didn't Invincible! Paul prove his worth as a mate to Anissa by teleporting Conquest onto Mars and then blowing Conquest (and a large portion Mars itself) up with antimatter? Or was that another Viltrumite?

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It was that orange haired Viltrumite that attacked Nolan on Thraxa.

And it took place on Venus.

 

[ch405_5p34r]

hehe. idk what the Team is on about - i thought it was pretty damn funny.

 

[Neruz]

Paul what are you doing

even an idiot can come up with a better ad then that

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I'd be willing to bet money that people would unironically love this ad in real life.

 

[Mr Zoat]

Wait, I'm confused. Didn't Invincible! Paul prove his worth as a mate to Anissa by teleporting Conquest onto Mars and then blowing Conquest (and a large portion Mars itself) up with antimatter? Or was that another Viltrumite?

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No, that was Vidor. Beating Conquest would be a much bigger deal, and Anissa wouldn't have approached him.

 

[Huttj509]

I'd be willing to bet money that people would unironically love this ad in real life.

Click to shrink...

I know I'd love it IRL. To the point, explains what the product is, why the product is, and has some fun taking the piss during.

 

[LazySloth13]

The ad feels like the opposite of one of the wackier Japanese ads about snacks, maybe Paul should have included a bunny mascot for additional humor where he's super serious while a person in a suit if not actual rabbits is playing in the background or foreground. Or have two rabbits dressed/altered to reflect his messaging in the difference between American and British chocolates.

 

[Mr Zoat]

The ad feels like the opposite of one of the wackier Japanese ads about snacks, maybe Paul should have included a bunny mascot for additional humor where he's super serious while a person in a suit if not actual rabbits is playing in the background or foreground. Or have two rabbits dressed/altered to reflect his messaging in the difference between American and British chocolates.

Click to shrink...

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fyDE2IojZFg

What you got?

 

[hkim]

They what? Those amongst your colleagues who have heard this rant before.. what?

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Paul's gone off about American chocolate before. At... great length and intensity. Do you not remember him buying Cadbury's?

 

[Bud-E]

@Mr Zoat What stories did OL and Jade end up telling Morpheus, and what were his reactions to them?

 

[Chaoswind]

@Mr Zoat What stories did OL and Jade end up telling Morpheus, and what were his reactions to them?

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Probably best to assume they told him about prior episodes from the fic... Not the one with alternative universes and Paul literally changing how time travel works to solve it, but everything else was probably fair.

 

[boo600]

Don't listen to the naysayers! The ad is brilliant!

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It's a funny ad and would probably go viral.

I just don't think it would sell many candy bars.

"Heh. Funny commercial."

"Gonna buy one?"

"Hell no."

Click to shrink...

That ad was hilarious. Honestly, it would make me want to buy both bars to make a proper comparison. In fact, since people are mentioning social media, that would probably go viral as well; people trying both versions and seeing which they prefer. Then we would have two camps, the snobs that like proper chocolate and the ones that like the 'differently flavored' US one.

Let the Chocolate Wars begin!

Click to shrink...

I'd be willing to bet money that people would unironically love this ad in real life.

Click to shrink...

I know I'd love it IRL. To the point, explains what the product is, why the product is, and has some fun taking the piss during.

Click to shrink...

I agree that this is my favorite ad ever. The problem is, I now genuinely want the next three.

 

[Mr Zoat]

I agree that this is my favorite ad ever. The problem is, I now genuinely want the next three.

Click to shrink...

I haven't written them, though one would have involved nervous-looking dogs standing on a conveyor belt as they're fed into a machine, yelping, and then coming out sitting down. The words 'footage unrelated' would then flash underneath it.

@Mr Zoat What stories did OL and Jade end up telling Morpheus, and what were his reactions to them?

Click to shrink...

Pass. The SI would want to tell him about Krona, but would probably decide that it was too much of a risk due to the Killala thing. Likewise, he'd like to tell him about his interactions with Desire due to his suspicion regarding Desire's succession, but he doesn't want to risk pissing Desire off. He'd probably talk about the Shadowlands due to the fact that Morpheus either wouldn't know anything about it due to nothing there dreaming or would know things about it that no one else does. Beyond that, don't know.

 

[Vaermina]

"Just a couple of minutes." I shrug. "Shot differences. I don't know; I didn't do media studies."

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Your general reminder that Orange Lantern is actually really horrible at understanding normal people.

"In nineteen oh four, Cadbury's began using condensed milk in place of powdered milk, resulting in a chocolate of a far smoother consistency."

Nothing for two seconds, then the screen switches to me in my hastily redecorated office in Bourneville. I'm standing in front of my desk, just off centre of the shot.

"Meanwhile some of our American colleagues couldn't quite get the hang of the process of creating condensed milk, and managed to induce increased levels of bacterial growth and an increase in the levels of butyric acid. Other sources of butyric acid include…"

Click to shrink...

Someone might want to tell Mr Zoat he got his history wrong in multiple different ways here since I'm pretty sure he didn't have the character being wrong intentionally.

For those who don't want to read the entire link however.

Hershey's first created mass produced Milk Chocolate in the year 1900, they utilized Fresh Milk, and used a lipolysis method to prevent early spoilage. As they kept this method secret, Cadbury was unable to use it themselves and in 1905 came up with a different way of doing things involving condensed milk. Neither of these actions were taken for "smoother consistency" however, but to allow longer storage of the candy without spoilage.

Those amongst my colleagues who have heard this rant before don't react as still images of a pool of vomit and a dog's posterior briefly flash up on the screen, while the others make expressions of disgust. Then the camera pulls back to reveal that both images are framed images on my desk… With a Hershey's bar resting between then.

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I guess this answers the question about whether he consulted with Cadbury's legal department before producing and airing that add.

And the answer is, he did not.

 

[RichardWhereat]

Paul's gone off about American chocolate before. At... great length and intensity. Do you not remember him buying Cadbury's?

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The quoted sentence wasn't finished. Mr Zoat corrected this after I wrote that.

 

[boo600]

I haven't written them, though one would have involved nervous-looking dogs standing on a conveyor belt as they're fed into a machine, yelping, and then coming out sitting down. The words 'footage unrelated' would then flash underneath it.

Click to shrink...

I know; that's why wanting more is a problem.

The 'footage unrelated' thing is already an excellent frosting. Thank you for the cake, cake man!

…hey, no one's called Paul 'the Cake Man' in multiple days. Maybe he's escaping the nickname?

 

[Mr Zoat]

6th March 2025
09:21 GMT -5

"Mark, honey?" Deborah Grayson looks up in surprise as Invincible walks into her house. "What's going on?"

"Ah." He stops right where he is, freezing up. "H-hey."

I spotted that the recently-rebuilt house on the other side of the road is still a G.D.A. observation post. Omni-Man's wife could easily become a target, and then there's the fact that the local Invincible and his brother live here most of the time. The people there have almost certainly sent a message to their superiors, though whether they've notified the local-.

Oh, they have. And Atom Eve too, by the looks of things. And they are not hanging around.

"Is that all I'm getting?"

"N-. No. No, ah… Okay, ah, a bunch of different versions of me from parallel universes are invading-."

"Is it Angstrom?"

"Yes! Yes. And-."

"I thought you… I thought you killed him? You… Said…"

Oh. That's news. "Ah." Invincible isn't acting well, but he was so overtly discomported anyway that it looks like a natural continuation of how he was behaving from the moment he opened the door. "I thought I did, too. He's got a big scar across his face and a bunch of cybernetic implants, so I guess someone stuck him back together again. It's not like we understood everything about what his power can do." She nods. "But I want you to get somewhere safe before I go out and fight them."

Mrs. Grayson takes a moment to control herself, then nods. "Okay. I'll call Cecil-."

"No. They're going after the G.D.A. and the Guardians of the Globe first. So unless they put a secret bunker in the place across the street, the safest thing to do is head out of the city. Get somewhere remote, and stay there until there's an all-clear. Okay?"

She's already grabbing her car keys. "Okay. What about Oliver?"

Because this Invincible has a younger brother, and Invincible isn't used to taking him into account.

"I'll pick him up and…" He sighs to cover up the fact that he's trying to think of something. "I can't… Keep him completely safe, but I can tell him to stick with one of the recovery teams while I handle the other Invincibles."

She nods as she heads for the door.

"Alright. I don't like the idea of him seeing all those bodies, but I know that he'll refuse if we just-."

Invincible wraps his arms around her in a side-hug. "I love you, Mom."

Mrs. Grayson is momentarily surprised by the change in tone, then briefly hugs him back. "I love you too, Mark. Now-."

There's a sort of fizzing, crackling noise-

"Incoming!"

-as the local Atom Eve shoots through the space I was occupying, violet construct knives outstretched!

"GET THE HELL AWAY FROM MY MOTHER!"

The local Invincible is staring down at Invincible, fists balled but not daring to attack in case Mrs. Grayson gets hurt.

"Mark-?"

The fizzing and crackling increases as… I haven't seen Atom Eve fly that often. Apparently, she has to apply thrust through her feet, which seems inefficient. Pink energy bolts shoot towards me-.

I evade and shield, because I need to know how strong they-

Atom Eve comes to an abrupt halt in the air. "What?"

-are. Detonation… Cracks the construct but doesn't breach it. Good to know.

Invincible spreads his arms out and steps away from Mrs. Grayson. "Calm down. I'm not here to hurt Mom."

The local Invincible walks closer to Invincible. "She's not your mom!"

Atom Eve isn't attacking. She's just floating in the air, staring at me. "Who are you?"

"Invincible thought that it would be a good idea to have backup, and I was privileged to be called upon. I am Orange Lantern, Janissary of the Viltrumite Empire. From our… Parallel."

"I know." Invincible pointedly walks away from Mrs. Grayson, opening a clear route to her car. "But in my universe, my mom's… Dead. I just want her to get somewhere safe. And I… I wanted to see her again."

He shrugs, a.. little helplessly. But that doesn't seem to win him any points with his doppelgänger.

"Look, I'll help you fight the others. And I-." He looks up at me. "Lantern, get Mom out of the city!"

"Certainly." I tether Mrs. Grayson to move her into the car's driving seat, and then tether the car and lift it. "Hold on tight, Missus Grayson."

And accelerate.

She doesn't actually need to hold on tight. It's just something to say.

I could try transitioning out of the city, but there are technologies which can disrupt that and I don't want to get myself killed. I also don't want to get Mrs. Grayson killed. Looking down, it appears that news of the attacks is starting to spread. Roads are getting filled. Not clogged. Not yet. I'm not sure if that's due to some people being slow on the uptake, the belief that this will be over quickly and it's best to shelter in place, or if they've got experience with supervillains attacking road convoys.

Hm. Okay, this should be far enough. An out of town shopping centre with a large car park. Not in the countryside, but far enough from the city centre to be safeish and far enough ahead of the rush that she can drive safely. I descend, setting the car down gently.

"Good luck, Missus Grayson."

And then I fly back, focusing more easily now that I don't have a weight to carry. And-.

Oh dear. I've seen a lot of inhabited buildings knocked down over the years, but I had hoped that part of my life was over. Apparently not.

The Invincibles are in the air. Invincible's body language is a little more relaxed, while the local Invincible is… Maybe a little less hostile.

"…recruited Sinclair to build more of his zombots for the G.D.A.."

Local Invincible nods. "Yeah, he did the same here. And yeah, I'm angry about it, but that doesn't make conquering the Earth for the Viltrum Empire okay!"

"Not even if they killed Mom?"

Local Invincible jerks back slightly in the air. "What? How?"

"When Dad went… Active, Cecil tried teleporting all the zombots Sinclair had made to where Dad was. Except Sinclair was smarter than him. They appeared for, like, a second, then they hacked the teleport system and teleported right back to G.D.A. headquarters. Cecil and Mom died right away, and… By the time any reinforcements got there, their entire command team was dead."

Local Invincible hesitates, then nods. "And that's… Why? Because William and Mom were dead? And that's..? Justified? All the people you killed?"

Invincible floats there for a moment, then shrugs. "Hey, you asked why, I told you. But the other usses are wrecking your world right now, not mine. Why don't we go deal with them first?"

 

[Darko]

reinforcements got there, their entire command team was dead.

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Add a " at the end.

recruited Doctor Sinclair to

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Not sure he was a doctor.

I think he was still a student when Cecil recruited him.

 

[LordVishnu]

Looking forward to some sort of conversation between Paul and Atom Eve.

People will with similar power sets always share the best notes.

 

[Mr Zoat]

Add a " at the end.

Not sure he was a doctor.

I think he was still a student when Cecil recruited him.

Click to shrink...

Thank you, corrected.

 

[Thundersmight94]

I've been wondering, does every invincible Parallel have a version of Paul, or is Invincible!Paul the only one/few in this section of the Invincible multiverse?

 

[Shadowj6480]

Looking forward to some sort of conversation between Paul and Atom Eve.

People will with similar power sets always share the best notes.

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Paul definitely feels like he'll just manifest a stack of papers or a flash drive and go "Here's my notes on ways to use your power. Good luck, and I hope your Earth fares better than mine."

Edit: Well, if he's pressed for time that is. Otherwise the conversation will likely be a lot more in-depth.