KharnTheBrotrayer
Making the rounds.
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- Nov 9, 2023
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The power battery will fail in short order, a scant 100,000 years from now it will no longer function, please excuse the slapdash construction of the lantern.
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I'll bet the stuff they can't mass-produce were crazy things like 'planet-buster raygun' or 'clone-manufacturing biopod'. Things that would have little or no general use, or extremely iffy legal and moral issues with their use. Still, I can't imagine it's easy to get them out of hock...Earth 12
3rd February 2043
09:26 GMT -5
"Can you really trust them, Dad?"
Claudia, bless her, was able to organise my patently ridiculous request on impressively short notice. Probably from experience with trade shows or something. A lot of our back catalogue and prototypes spend their days mouldering in secure storage, with production models… Usually made to order. Getting them out, packed up, and getting the permissions we needed -both legally and practically- required an all-nighter from… A small army of people, including my daughter.
Well, they're not interested in those things now. Maybe when they were much younger..."Yes." I nod. "In the same way as we can trust the Guardians. They just aren't interested in the sorts of things that humans are."
"Y-."
To be fair, it does sound a little crazy. And given his age, she wouldn't be amiss for thinking he's a little loopy."Did I ever tell you about the time that narrowly dodged being abducted by Krona?"
She looks a little blank, and shakes her head.
I take it this version reformed, rather than the comics' continued villainy."It was when I first met Matthew Hagen. Clayface?" A slight pause, then she nods. "Must be half a lifetime ago now." Hmm. "Apparently, Krona was kidnapping different parallel universe versions of me and of a woman named Jade Nguyen and using them to do… Something or other."
"Jade Nguyen… Jade Harper, the assassin? Married Roy Harper…"
Wait, seriously? Who would block the use of weather control? Where they afraid of some loony taking control and holding the world for ransom? ...Then again, given guys like the Weather Wizard...I look over some of the crates, remembering faces… Mostly retired or 'departed', driven and often slightly mad people who built machines the rest of the world hasn't caught up to yet. Or that got banned by international convention, like the weather control system. We have to get… Oh, so many signatures when someone wants to turn down a hurricane now. And we charge for that, but I can't but-.
Heh. At that age when he can get easily distracted by random thoughts..."Dad?"
"Hm? Oh." I nod. "Yes, that's the woman. The two of them did some freelance work for me. Professional introductions, bodyguarding… Haven't seen them for a while, actually. Wonder how they're doing."
Because of course Cadmus did crazy stuff like that... Still, funny to imagine superheroes getting taken out by something as mundane as a plane crash. Unless it was something like Green Arrow's death. (Not that that one stuck in the end...)"Ah." Claudia looks awkward. "They're dead, Dad. They-."
"Oh!" I blink. "Yes, the… Plane. Sorry, slipped my mind." I snort. "I think I need to take another one of those cognitive acuity tests. I didn't miss Lian or Gwen dying, did I?"
Given that she'd be in her sixties by now, it's a bit late for that."Not as far as I know, but I can check." She looks at me awkwardly. "Dad, are you okay?"
I shrug. "I'm old. I don't recommend it, if there's an alternative."
And knowing the DCAU, 'bioware' like carbon-fibre mesh sheathes for his bones or stuff like that are probably illegal under the same laws as Splicing was."Rani said you were thinking about full-body prosthesis. Those aren't… Safe."
"No, I know. But brittle bones and a failing musculature aren't safe, either. The main issue would be surviving the operation."
True. His long term is a lot shorter these days. Unless something happens to change that."Then you'd have the psychological problems. We don't have a lot of data on the long term effects."
"Haha..!" I smile. "Oh, Claudia, why would I be worried about the long term? Besides, someone's got to go first."
"Then why not just-."
And I'm picturing it like a comic-book panel slowly drawing itself into existence. Pencils, then inks, then colours...I wince as the same flickering, wind-gusting thing from yesterday happens, raising my right hand to shield my eyes. This time I'm looking in the right direction to spot the Controller appear. He sort of… Appears from the middle of his torso, the bit of him that's 'here' spreading out until I can see all of him. Takes a moment for the colour to catch up. I wonder why? Seems like the sort of thing a Controller should be able to manage on their own, but I got Green Lantern Kai-Ro to check and apparently the Controller really was a Controller.
I suppose Earth Bullshit™ might well surpass even what a Maltusian could create..."Lantern Peter Wynne."
I moue, then reach into my jacket pocket and pull out the ring. Still just as dead as it's been for decades. "Technically. As per your order, we've assembled everything that might interest you here, and a-" I point to a small quantum drive in a secure case. "-digital copy of our entire archive. I'm not sure what use any of it will be to a Controller, but it's all yours."
Certainly, the fact he's, you know, old should also have been a clue."A digital copy would be inefficient. Simply transmit the data from your power ring."
"Ah. Well, yes, I'd like to do that. One small problem there."
Ironically, he probably had very little to do with the actual building, so 'assembling' would probably be more accurate..."If your desire is insufficient, state what you want to make the exchange."
"No, no. I owe you this for… Everything. I just don't have a way to recharge the ring. It ran out of power long before I assembled… Before I built any of this."
And I'm surprised he's actually surprised by that. More likely he's just playing dumb.The Controller regards me levelly. "Your ring has no charge."
I nod. "I'm afraid not."
Joy of burning most of your charge on asteroid mining."Where is your personal lantern?"
"I didn't ever have one. And I couldn't find one in this parallel." I shrug. "I've been stuck on Earth for almost my entire life, so I might just have missed it-."
'Almost', though. Not everyone manages it. And those that didn't generally found other options. In your case, you took the Luthor route. Minus the whole 'go nuts, try to fistfight superman in a purple-and-green battlesuit' angle..."That is surprising. Almost all alternate versions of you find some way to recharge their ring."
…
Ouch.
As if he didn't look there first chance he got..."Well… I… Didn't. If you can tell me where I can find one, I can send a team to pick it up, but-."
"Okaara, in the Vega System."
Most of which have moral issues or limited supply. Like eating magic or other Ring user's charge..."I checked there." I shake my head. "No myths relating to a 'Beast', and no Forbidden Forest of Weeds. I suspect that your forebears just didn't build an orange lantern in this universe."
"There are other ways to recharge a power ring."
On the other hand, you've had a long life, a happy one, and avoided most of the difficulties of existing in a superhero world."I didn't want to take a chance on learning them when I had finite power reserves and a ring that has a reputation for driving the user insane. I was cautious, and I'm a little surprised that you're telling me that my alter egos behaved so differently."
But I'm… Kind of bummed out that he's telling me that… Everyone else did… I mean, okay, not 'better', but-. It would have been nice to have. I remember the Despair Squid episode of Red Dwarf, where the team were told that they only got 3% in their own lives.
Heh. Even the Controller getting annoyed by his easily-distracted moments...Gosh, I haven't thought about that for years.
"Lantern Wynne."
"Sorry. Sorry. Happens to humans at my age. I-."
Plus, fixing the whole 'old' problem would extend his operational time."Would your effectiveness at collecting useful resources be increased if you had a personal lantern?"
"Ah." … "I'd have access to the rest of the universe, so, probably? But, I… I'm not sure I could-."
A little bit late, anyway. Peter's a little bit old for gallivanting and righteous face-punching right now."Every version of you has mastered their ring, except you." Oh. Ow. Right in the pride. "But I accept that a percentage of you that exist in the multiverse would be unable to achieve that due to circumstances beyond their control, and you have clearly prospered despite that."
"If you going to give me directions-."
Interesting. A temporary offering, presumably with a more permanent option possible in future, contingent on delivery of what's promised?The Controller holds out his hands, winds gusting once again and orange light glowing between them. A moment passes, and then-.
A… Personal lantern. But it doesn't look like a Green Lantern's lantern. It looks more like a construct, but…
Hmph. Perhaps arrangements can be made on that front, then. Delivering a Light Fountain, perhaps...I look the Controller in the eyes, waiting. Because he's got exactly what I want.
"This will give you the ability to recharge. Temporarily. Since your universe lacks an Orange Central Power Battery it will fade and fail in time. I will restore it if you prove that you are worth my time. Recharge yourself, so that I can direct you in opening the portal from your end."
And his daughter is like 'Holy cow, dad, you didn't say you were hot!' Because she's standing right here watching.Oh.
Right then.
I slip the ring on my left ring finger, and raise my hand.
But he also said, "Every version of you has master [sic] their ring, except you." Hard to master a ring you can't recharge.
No, that's something that Hinon might say, if sarcastically. Jevek would say something like 'if you want a better one then make it yourself'.The power battery will fail in short order, a scant 100,000 years from now it will no longer function, please excuse the slapdash construction of the lantern.
Well, if it's Anissa he could a lot worse.I nod. "If they inherit viltrumite powers from their viltrumite parents, logically you'd be looking for a father who could provide other beneficial characteristics."
"Or we could just nominate the one guy on the planet who's made himself useful." A.. h. "So I don't really know anything about what other viltrumites like doing on dates, but maybe you should pick out some restaurants and get some nicer clothes?"
"I… Can do that." And I'm not enough of a hypocrite to try and weasel out of it, not after what I said to Eve. "When.. is the woman in question arriving?"
"Couple of days, and the integration team is coming with her. Ships and guys from other client worlds to turn the Earth into something." He smiles. "Finally, right?"
I take a deep breath, and try and look happy about things.
"I just hope she finds my work satisfactory."
Honestly i'm hoping this will lead to a Kryptonian vs Viltrumite fight at some point, hopefully with Silver Age Kara as the Kryptonian.
Would be fun to see a Viltrumite's reaction to just how much more bullshit Kryptonians can be.
Real "Last King Of Scotland" vibes. From what I've read, actual dictators are often like this.Lmao Paul is going to have to do exactly what he suggested Eve do!
I'm loving this setting, the tension of uneasily cooperating with a warlord Invincible is great.
He reminds me of Stane in Iron Man 1. Really liked to do the shoulder arm thingy.Every interaction with Invincible here reminds me of the interactions with Hans Landa.
That should say GDA.Viltrumites don't work like that. The reports Eve was given before the GSA was destroyed claimed that Viltrumites are 100% exotic matter. They called them 'smart atoms', which sounds exciting but doesn't really explain anything. An effect based on the user's mental state, perhaps? And there's no real difference between Invincible and Omniman in that regard, so… Maybe that attribute is heritable, regardless of ancestry? I haven't seen any of Omniman's medical records, so I've got no idea-.
Only really a workable idea if you can control them once you thaw them out. Ideally, you'd try to rehabilitate them, but that might not always be possible... And no, nanotech bombs in their skulls aren't always the best option, Amanda.8th May 2024
12:37 GMT
"…kind strange, but I guess we all gotta have hobbies." Invincible shoves the blast door out of the way with brute strength. "Not like they're any use to us."
I wait for him to lead me inside… What I think was once a Global Defence Agency holding facility. Dimly reminds me of something Stormwatch used to use; sticking the most dangerous people on the planet in suspended animated just in case they need them.
...Not really something to smile at. Still, he's seeming less human every time we see him. Perhaps it's a Viltrumite thing to be able to disassociate things like that. To make people 'not people' they feel fine with reducing to chunky salsa.Here, they keep their parts.
The lights come on in rows as Invincible walks down the row, looking left and right with a faint smile on his face.
Given Viltrumite strength, everyone without superhuman resilience is basically made of plasticine."Dad didn't see the point, but the way I see it? There were the strongest humans alive."
I recognise scraps of costume, half a face where the skull was sliced vertically in half. But for most of the pods I have to scan the labels.
And from what I remember, there are some real losers in the superpower lottery..."They're worth remembering."
"Because they tried their best, despite their weakness?"
...Honestly, not a terrible idea, especially if the reassembly isn't instantaneous. Still..."No." He glances back, and under his cowl I can just about see his incredulous frown. "Because they failed. Oh." He flies up three levels of preservation pod, staring at the contents. Two arms, a leg and part of a torso are held roughly in the places they'd be if the pod contained a full body. "I remember this guy. Ex.. plodio..? Explo-dude? Something like that. I just waited until he blew himself up -and that barely even messed up my hair, by the way- and they stuck my arm into the space where he was reassembling himself."
That would suck so hard, realising that you're already dead, and just waiting for your body to catch up...He turns and looks down at me.
"I mean, seriously. He just looked down at my arm-. He wasn't even all there yet, and he couldn't stop it and he knew exactly what I was gunna do… Tch."
Good question. Orange Rings aren't exactly known for an ability to resurrect people, and these folks have been dead way too long for conventional healing.I nod. "If he couldn't hurt you, then it was a stupid position to put himself in."
He waves his right arm. "Ex-actly. So why did you want to come in here, anyway?"
And it's kind of worrying that he's revealing this, but considering he has few options to prevent them taking his Ring away...I shrug. "To recharge."
"Oh." He frowns. "I thought your powers were just… Your powers."
...Well, that was surprising. I suppose unless 'Matthew' betrays him, he's not really gonna care about him much."I apologise for inadvertently misleading you. There are things I can do without an external power source, but I usually need to draw power from… Well, there are a few things that work-."
"Ah, I don't care. Kinda disappointed, but… Whatever." He looks away, floating along the row. "So, do you eat them, or what?"
Ah, I see. He's here to get interesting data and samples, not to recharge.The honest answer would be that some sort of device from the subterranean levels of a mad science bunker only a little while after arriving on this Earth. But the Controller wanted this sort of thing, and… Sneaking around behind Invincible's back is a non-starter.
"No, it's something that the organelle's in their cells do; an energy they accumulate. I leach off it. Since they're dead they're not going to recharge, but I can build up a big charge like this."
I suppose if the agents were warned beforehand that might happen to them, I suspect they'd be okay with it, depending on their loyalty."Ah, fine. It's better than what the GDA was going to do. Did you know they made cyborg zombies out of their own agents?"
"No, but I can't say that I'm surprised. Um. Which of these..? Do you not mind me using?"
Man, imagine if he actually did make someone go through it all... Ew."The spare parts tank is down the end. I just sort of scooped up all the parts I could find. Kinda meant to have someone go through it, but all the GDA guys are dead, so…"
"I can sort it if you like? Match genetics, that sort of thing?"
Because I have no doubt the GDA kept DNA records on every superbeing, partnered or not.He gives me a puzzled look. "I thought you were draining them?"
"Just the exotic cells. Just about everything else will be left over. I can gene-match the parts…"
The best kind of heist. One you can pull off in front of the guards, and they'll even offer to help carry the loot out...He brow unfurrows, and he nods. "That would actually be helpful."
He points, and… Ah, yes, the spare parts tank. I fly over to it and lay my right hand on the transparent aluminium viewing panel. Extend a construct through and start subspacing the exotic cells.
And presumably it had safety features that prevented things like backflow. Especially if he could eject it at high velocity.As far as I can tell, just about all superpowers have some sort of physiological basis. Someone like Aquarius obviously wasn't making the water his… 'Water vomit' used inside his body. So while most of his physical abnormalities were just alien biology, there were just a little exotic matter in his mouth that appeared to let him conjure high pressure water from nowhere. It actually didn't, but… You'd need to be a lot more intelligent than me to understand what it was actually doing.
Until the fun parts of her powers kick in. Then things can get trippy.And it doesn't take that many. Even Eve, who has the highest proportion of exotic matter to normal matter ration of any human I've scanned, is still almost indistinguishable from a normal woman. Is a normal woman for most purposes.
Given that the sum total contribution of 'smart atoms' involved on Omni-Man's part during conception is one sperm cell... I'm guessing they can convert other matter into more of themselves.Viltrumites don't work like that. The reports Eve was given before the GSA was destroyed claimed that Viltrumites are 100% exotic matter. They called them 'smart atoms', which sounds exciting but doesn't really explain anything. An effect based on the user's mental state, perhaps? And there's no real difference between Invincible and Omniman in that regard, so… Maybe that attribute is heritable, regardless of ancestry? I haven't seen any of Omniman's medical records, so I've got no idea-.
Ooh, useful. Data for a targetted virus, perhaps. Or perhaps infusing others with the same properties. Like the Danner formula on super-steroids.There.
Omniman and Invincible took on everything the world could throw at them and won, but not entirely without injury. Entirely without lasting injury, but they bled a few times and Invincible picked up a lot more injuries in his aborted superhero career. And one of these people either got good or got lucky or… Invincible really wasn't policing his battlegrounds well, because this blood sample is all behaving anomalously.
Let's hope he can't see what you're actually doing, and it just looks like scanning. Otherwise, amtthew's career ends here.It's useless to us; all the researchers who could do anything with it are very dead. But the Controller expressed an interest. And while it would look suspicious as anything if-.
Invincible lays an arm over my shoulders, and I freeze.
Phew. Just that. Still, smart of him to do so.If I started searching in the wards where he recuperated while injured, I… Thought that I could get away with this.
"You know I had that ward bugged, right? So I know Eve isn't exactly stoked about our relationship."
He's hopeful, certainly. With any luck it'll be a vain hope in the end."I'm sorry, but that wasn't a realistic prospect. The best I could do was-."
"Hey, hey." He inclines his head towards me. "I'm not angry. You're right. The only way she'd accept it was if you made it out to be some big self-sacrificing gesture. She'll come around. But my Dad…"
And since most of humanity hates him... Oh, this is the worst kind of wingman.He releases my shoulder and floats a little way away.
"I think he was hoping I'd hook up with a nice viltrumite girl. I told him I didn't see the point; a viltrumite's a viltrumite, so any of my kids will be viltrumites whether their mom's viltrumite or human or… Whatever. And hey, maybe they'll get Eve's powers as well. But apparently someone high up wants to make sure that viltrumite women can breed with humans, and if I'm not available… Then it has to be someone else."
...Oh no. Matthew, you'd better learn to heal yourself mid-coitus...I nod. "If they inherit viltrumite powers from their viltrumite parents, logically you'd be looking for a father who could provide other beneficial characteristics."
"Or we could just nominate the one guy on the planet who's made himself useful." A.. h. "So I don't really know anything about what other viltrumites like doing on dates, but maybe you should pick out some restaurants and get some nicer clothes?"
Good for the goose, good for the gander and all that."I… Can do that." And I'm not enough of a hypocrite to try and weasel out of it, not after what I said to Eve. "When.. is the woman in question arriving?"
"Couple of days, and the integration team is coming with her. Ships and guys from other client worlds to turn the Earth into something." He smiles. "Finally, right?"
And hope that it doesn't turn into that Futurama episode...I take a deep breath, and try and look happy about things.
"I just hope she finds my work satisfactory."
These were the strongest humans alive.
...and then stuck my arm into the space where he was reassembling himself....and they stuck my arm into the space where he was reassembling himself.
delete 'that'"The honest answer would be that some sort of device from the subterranean levels of a mad science bunker
delete 'ration'highest proportion of exotic matter to normal matter ration of any human
vultrumite-human Danner enchancile hybrid mass transformation is on the table.
Regardless, this might require artificial insemination. Human rigidity versus viltrumite muscles and whatnot. I guess adjusting his environmental shield to be permeable to semen could maybe work?
Progress. Not all of it the sort of progress you might want, but progress nonetheless.
Lmao Paul is going to have to do exactly what he suggested Eve do!