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I'm reasonably confident that a significant percentage of 7 year old boys across the world would, in fact, revel in being a humanoid dragon, at least initially.
What do you mean? Don't all parents want their children to become fire-breathing reptiles?
Ah, Doctor Cranius, head surgeon and master creator of the Un-Men. A modern-day Frankenstein with a taste for the aesthetic and unusual, if anyone doesn't remember him. Also no more than a head with limbs, so I understand him creating extra optional body parts.12th July 2012
07:12 GMT -8
I find myself pulling a face as I dock with the aesthetian and feel the slight pull as it connects with my ingestion hole. Perhaps I will be accustomed to it in time. Or perhaps I am too accustomed to my physical freedom to ever really get accustomed to something like this. Still, it is progress, and it is more… Respectful, than being thrown into a bucket of partially digested fish heads. Relaxing my face, I reach out with my mind for the neural interface made with the new types of synthetic flesh which is compatible with Un-Men…
Heh, I see his maker's programming is still there, and that he's well aware of that. And really? He considered the ability to eat and taste food superfluous? What a fool.**[Connect]**
At once the next texture and flavour of the air change as neural mechanisms which the-. That Anton Arcane considered superfluous to my design, connect to my brain. My innate capacity for the chemical analysis of air is usually limited to 'breathable', 'contains blood' and 'not breathable', but with a little help…
And yet that sense of humour is quite refined. After all, what better name than a pun on the act of eating?My brain can learn to do things that it was not designed to do.
With the connection in place the aesthetian… Since this is the final version I need to think of a name for it. It would not do to appear to be treating an Un-Man as an object after all, even if this is no more intelligent that a chipmunk. 'Bud' as in 'taste bud'? No, no, that makes it sound like a flower. Gus Tatory? Satisfactory, but I will check with Niko before I make it official. When you are a grotesque, your humour is grotesque. It does not always play well to others.
...Yeah, chocolate may be a bit much for a first run. After all, even the simplest taste can be overwhelming when you're not familiar with it. Chocolate, with its variety of possible tastes and textures? Could well cause catatonia or addiction...I tested it with crackers while I was experimenting with the design, but Grayven suggested try toast for the first 'proper' meal. And suggested that the taste might kill me and then laughed about it. Niko suggested chocolate, but despite the safety mechanisms it might be better to be cautious. While not being so afraid of my own creation that I simply go along with Grayven's joke.
Gus's tentacles reach out and coats the first slice of toast in a very thin layer of butter, then cut it in half. The first half is delivered into the 'taste' receptacle directly, while the second is held up to my own mouth. It is a-.
Careful, now, Cranius. Don't want to let that desire for more become an addiction. Next thing you know 'Gus' will be running around licking everything just to taste it for you...I shudder as the feedback from Gus's taste nerves begins to reach me, unfamiliar.. feelings… I have knows lipids since my first moment, but I feel that I have never know them at all until this moment. Butter! All of the animal instincts I have never had are delighted to be putting away fat for winter! The toast itself is a more complex sensation, but… Let us try texture!
Don't think about it logically, Cranius. Sometimes, you just have to let yourself feel.I command the tentacle to bring the mouth half closer and bite. I have only basic sensation inside of my mouth, but I do have teeth and I do get pressure feedback to a surprisingly generous degree. I suspect that is because Arcane wanted me to know when I bit something rather than any sort of consideration for me, but between that and the taste… I will check with a computerized axial tomography scan later, but I think I am effectively receiving the sensation of eating toast as an unmodified man would.
Ooh. You may want to correct that before you do this in front of, well, anyone else.Splendid!
Of course, the downside since I don't actually have an oesophagus…
Now, if you can install those sensory nerves in your mouth, you'll have a much easier time of everything...I open my mouth a little wider, wadding as much of the chewed bread material into the front of my mouth as I can. A tentacle reaches down and scoops it up to deposit in the taste receptacle, where a moment later it gives a sudden jolt as the masticated food decays faster than the solid piece and gives the taste buds a more intense rush of chemicals.
My word.
Heh. Admittedly, he has no shame to cover up. And no real shame anyway.There's a quiet knock on the door.
"Cranius? Are you..? Ah, decent?"
Good to know he actually can tell if something is too nasty for company... And fascinating outlook on smart tech. It's only natural that he would consider bio-technology superior... I can only imagine what he's been getting up to with the Atlantean Biomancy texts I remember Grayven acquiring for him... Unless Gus is exactly that."Niko! Eh." I have the tentacle holding the toast to my mouth swiftly redirect it to the taste receptacle. Much as she is willing to embrace the strangeness that is a part of our nature I think that her stomach would still be turned by my chewing. "I am as decent as I am likely to get!"
She pushes her way into my workshop, computer tablet in hand. I am still not entirely comfortable with machines that can pretend to think, but I can appreciate the utility. She looks closely at Gus as she walks closer, then raises her eyebrows.
There's a big difference between existing and living, herr Doktor. Now you get to experience on of the fun parts of living."How is it?"
"I have nozhing wizh which I could compare it. It is intense and it is novel, which is the most I could hope for. I… Zhink zhat tomorrow I will experiment with zhings ozher zhan toast."
Nice that he realises his limits...
"Oh, yes. Just something I ate..."Of course, I still have to actually ingest. It feels like the digestion process is ready, so I trigger the egestion system, and… I feels the same as usual. Perhaps a little tidier due to the fact that I now have a dedicated mechanism for fulfilling the purpose.
"Are you okay?"
...And now I'm not sure whether to ask how the waste gets out... Let's hope he realises to disconnect his sense of taste before doing so, if it's the obvious method."Yes?"
"You looked a little… Constipated, there."
"My dear, I don't have a bowel. Or a gut."
She has no idea of what's involved, does she? Her sanity is probably thankful for that.But I make an effort to control my expression. I don't want to make her uncomfortable.
"I guess that's a novel experience for you too, then."
Ah, so it's like an exhaust port? Well, I suppose that's better than what I was reluctantly imagining...I close my pseudo sphincter and disconnect, rising up on my fingertips.
"Let us not go crazy."
Now, now, Doctor, when you're dealing with live patients, it's a table. Also, I can't wait until he discovers things like Ice Cream. HE might have to ration his eating time per week, if only to prevent addiction.I disconnect my mind from Gus, who folds up back into 'sleep' mode to minimise energy wastage until I need to eat again. Perhaps some fruit? I used the brain of a monkey as my guide when I designed his brain, so that should work well. Next, I call Otto over and have him pick me up and set me down between his shoulders.
"Who is on zhe slab today?"
Man, that's gonna be fun for the boy. Going to sleep feeling horrible, waking up as a cool monster!"A seven year old boy named Klahan Saelim. He has terminal leukaemia."
Oh? Oh. A publicity job, then. Otto sighs for me as-.
Define 'slightly'? After all, a lot can be hidden under clothes."His parents have signed off on you giving him… Slightly visible improvements."
Ah… That's a little better. No, wait.
Don't go too crazy with the freakshow stuff? I'm sure there are all manner of internal improvements he coudl make. A functioning appendix, for instance, and completely resistant to appendicitis..."Like tiger-strip hair, or somezhing useful or significant?"
She taps her tablet. "They.. haven't specified. So there aren't any restrictions. Just remember-."
As cool as that sounds, I'd still prefer to be able to see normally... What about hawk eyesight? Imagine his reaction to being able to read fine print from a hundred meters away?"Yes, yes. Nothing to scare zhe person doing zhe post-procedure interviews. I'm zhinking… Squid eyes, obviously, wizh the expanded visual range."
"Ah, if he can't navigate-."
"Yah yah, slightly expanded. I'm not going to make him see gamma radiation."
She knows you too well, Doctor.I learned that lesson after the third time. I thought it was pretty!
Niko looks like she doesn't completely believe me.
Sure, but his parents might have objections to that level of tweaking. I wonder, how many patients have been tempted to sue after he got a 'little carried away?'"Okay, I don't think they'll be any problem with getting them to accept perfect eyesight. Do you want to throw anything else in there?"
Yes. I want to give him dragon wings and scale-covered shin capable of resisting low calibre bullets and the ability to spit napalm. Don't 7 year old boys like dragons?
You'd think they'd jump at the chance to have soldiers who can go without sleep for weeks, spit acid or change colours. All of which are Astartes implants no doubt suggested by Grayven...Ah, the dreams of a better tomorrow. I honestly had believed that the American military would be more enthusiastic about modifications that have combat applications, but it seems that if they do not allow the soldier to tear through sheet metal they have nearly as many reservations as the FDA.
The Department of Energy doesn't have that problem. Their agents are daring each other to be the first to get the electric eel discharge system.
A project for growing bulk skin grafts for burn victim treatments, perhaps? Though knowing the Un-Men, it could be for nearly anything..."I zhink… I will see where the muse takes me. Wizhin bounds."
"Okay. After that, Crassus wants to talk to you about his synthetic skin project."
Ah, good to hear he can restrain his less conventional sensibilities."He is still working with wizh the laboratory staff?"
"Ah… Yes, no recent report of any problems."
What's the bet that's the Team, getting a professional opinion on the Young Arion case?I smile.
"And after that-. Oh. We've got a booking for an emergency consultation. They… Haven't explained the nature of the problem, but they've only asked for two hours."
And perform all manner of Science! upon his ailing young body!Ah, such is life. They will have paid well for the privilege, and perhaps they have dreams of something original?
A disembodied head can dream, can't he?
"Okay. Let us go and see zhe young man."
There's a Karen joke here, I know it.What do you mean? Don't all parents want their children to become fire-breathing reptiles?
Define 'slightly'? After all, a lot can be hidden under clothes.
You'd think they'd jump at the chance to have soldiers who can go without sleep for weeks, spit acid or change colours. All of which are Astartes implants no doubt suggested by Grayven...
Squid eyes do see what we would consider normally.As cool as that sounds, I'd still prefer to be able to see normally... What about hawk eyesight? Imagine his reaction to being able to read fine print from a hundred meters away?
... was that really necessary?Ah, Doctor Cranius, head surgeon and master creator of the Un-Men.
Thank you, corrected.know -> known
feels -> feel (or maybe this is just how his internal monologue talks)
Technically, Crassus is Head Surgeon.Ah, Doctor Cranius, head surgeon and master creator of the Un-Men.
It was superfluous to Anton Arcane's needs.Heh, I see his maker's programming is still there, and that he's well aware of that. And really? He considered the ability to eat and taste food superfluous? What a fool.
"No, no. Hawks have zhe same stupid backwards eyes as humans."As cool as that sounds, I'd still prefer to be able to see normally... What about hawk eyesight? Imagine his reaction to being able to read fine print from a hundred meters away?
Squid eyes? Much more efficient, though I think they have their own downsides?"No, no. Hawks have zhe same stupid backwards eyes as humans."
"Well, yeees, you have to be a squid. Zhis is where I come in."Squid eyes? Much more efficient, though I think they have their own downsides?
Grayven's new Light are Grayven, Lex Luthor, Queen Clea, Cranius, Circe and The Shade, right? Am I forgetting anyone?
Another look into members of the Light, and a very interesting perspective it is. The Good Doctor is having some self improvement time. I guess with a bit of Grayven rubbing off on him, that there might be more of an urge to expand himself, and not just his people as the Muse wills.
Nope. All positives. They're even resistant to retinal detachment.Squid eyes? Much more efficient, though I think they have their own downsides?
Two Jews: three opinions. Whether or not there is a hell in Judaism is a matter of debate, though I've never heard a Jewish person state that it would be eternal, just proportional to the amount of sin.
I can't remember the title off hand but there is a fic where that was done and the little boy got into a very angry argument with his mother about a month later and unconsciously started to change. If the guy hadn't been there she might have accidentally been killed.. I want to give him dragon wings and scale-covered skin capable of resisting low calibre bullets and the ability to spit napalm. Don't 7 year old boys like dragons?
Nope. All positives. They're even resistant to retinal detachment.
Reptile lungs are another example of a straight upgrade with no penalty.
The cross chamber connections create a more efficient airflow.
This is Raven." I generate a construct image of her mother. "This is Angela Roth, her mother. The hundred metre-tall four-eyed demon we all saw last week was her father. How did you think that worked
"I dunno." He blinks, his gaze growing distance and his head tilting to the left. "And honestly? I kinda wish I wasn't trying to picture it right now
Do you really think that because we're both humanoid you can get me pregnant? Because that's not how biology works."
Even if that was true, that's magic and your ring just does blood
in -> into (maybe?)
Thank you, corrected.
Are you suggesting that he's been sleeping around?They also help prevent STD's, and seeing as Raul has been traveling through space he may have picked something that can be sexually transmitted and his ring can't get rid of it.
No.
N/A
Yes.Or was he just asking about Tamaranean marriage ceremonies, and they haven't met X'hal?
No, the ice crystal surrounds the bush.
Huh, when Zoat made Blaze, in comics canon a half human half demon child of the wizard Shazam a 100% biological human woman with a 100% soul made out of demonic energy, well I thought that was going to be the norm for cambions in this fic.
Being a manifestation of Zoat knowing what species are while apparently DC writers don't. Or just don't care.
So the indication that Raven is actually half demon biologically here surprises me.